nessangel



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    "Ilya had loved him through his worst moments. Ilya had helped him find a therapist when he’d collapsed on the floor of their hotel bathroom after losing a particularly brutal game, scratching at his chest. Ilya had held him, even when Shane yelled at him because there was panic crawling under his skin and he felt as though it might claw its way out. Ilya had told him it was okay; that it didn’t make him a bad player to resent the spotlight sometimes, that it didn’t make him a bad teammate to hate the team when they were too loud and too drunk and too physical, that it didn’t make him a bad person to need space to breathe. Ilya saved him.

    And look what you give him in return. You’re a shitty husband, Shane Hollander.

    You don’t deserve his last name."

     

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    content warnings: discussion of mental health, depiction of a panic attack, depiction of invasive medical procedure, depiction of violence (generally non-graphic), use of hate speech, depiction of a hate crime

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    33,828
    Chapters:
    3/3
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    26 Jan 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    All my Hollanov fics in one place, unrelated unless clearly stated otherwise

    Words:
    39,049
    Works:
    8
    Bookmarks:
    758

    24 Jan 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane can’t stand his college roommate and teammate, Ilya Rozanov. Can’t stand his arrogance and his messiness and his constant sleeping around.

    But then the entire team, Shane included, welcomes their families to campus for Parents Weekend.

    And Shane also can’t stand that Ilya is alone.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,937
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    280
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    6,682
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    23 Jan 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    It's Ilya and Shane's first Christmas together as an actual couple, and Ilya is a bit nervous to spend it with Shane's family. Of course, when he wakes up sick a few days before the holiday, that won't do. He can't ruin Christmas.

    Or, Ilya learns what it means to be cared for.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,354
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    356
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    6,710
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    1,382
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    62,114

    23 Jan 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya decides to make Shane jealous, and Shane won't let him get away with it.

    Or - the whiny, pathetic top Ilya fic where Shane makes Ilya beg for it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,400
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    255
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    14,501
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    149,196

    18 Jan 2026