Chapter Text
“Tooru! Hey - Tooru, what are you doing!”
“What does it look like?”
“Hey wait, wait! Stop this!” Iwaizumi gripped Oikawa’s shoulder.
Oikawa stopped and slapped Iwaizumi’s hand away, but locked eyes with him regardless. Panting through breaths, the exhaustion seemed to be hitting him all at once, Oikawa dropped his hands to his knees gasping his air in. So tired that he broke eye contact looking at the floor and tried gasping his breath steady.
Iwaizumi waited a moment before speaking. Although, Iwaizumi hadn’t been prepared to have to go looking for Oikawa after he wouldn’t answer his phone. His boyfriend was never hard to find. Iwazumi found him where he always found him after arguments, or when his boyfriend was stressed. Hitting serve after serve at the college volleyball court. Apparently to the point of physical exhaustion.
“You, okay?”
Oikawa lifted his head up and looked at Iwaizumi, eyebrows pinched together, face dumbstruck and dripping with sweat. “Really?”
Iwaizumi looked away, “Yeah, alright,” He palmed the back of his own neck, “I agree, dumb question.”
“What about you?”
Iwaizumi turned back, really looking at Oikawa, he wasn’t just asking to be polite, he had slowly regained his height, but still breathed heavily with his shoulders slack, looking at Iwaizumi, waiting to hear how he was doing. “Well, honestly I don’t know. I’ve kinda just been worried about you.” Iwaizumi shrugged.
Oikawa nodded. Part of him feeling warm at the idea, the other part unsatisfied, “Other than that?”
Iwaizumi scoffed. “You’re too much of a handful for there to be anything other than that.”
Oikawa grabbed one of the last balls in the sack and chucked it square at his boyfriend. Iwaizumi dodged it in time, easily, but not before irritation hit him.
“What the hell was that for?”
Oikawa’s hands now held locks of his own hair, pulling. “Ugh, I just wanted to have an opinion from you. What do you want to do about this?”
Iwaizumi stepped back, almost backing away. He really didn’t have anything to say to that, he really had only been thinking of Oikawa. Their (kid, baby, it, thing) was sort of an afterthought. A reason why they were freaking out. Sure Oikawa had told him in the morning, but then they had both agreed to go to class, think about things. But the only ‘things’ Iwaizumi had on his mind had been Oikawa. The child was too complex of an idea, “The kid," Iwaizumi started, picking his words, "it's just not fully real to me - yet.”
“Yeah, It's not real to me either.” Oikawa said in a sort of irritated tone, turning away, “But I can’t get it out of my head.” Oikawa had whispered the last part, taking on a sadder tone. Iwaizumi could have missed it, if he hadn’t been fully focusing on Oikawa, which he was.
“How long have you been here?”
Oikawa didn’t answer immediately, “I don’t know,” He tried dodging lightly before seeing Iwaizumi wasn’t convinced, “Over an hour I guess, maybe two.”
“Ugh,” Iwaizumi sighed, it was a mixture of many emotions, but not fully upset. Looking at Oikawa was taking years off his life, to say he looked exhausted was an understatement, Iwaizumi was half sure Oikawa hadn’t been sleeping well, not to mention adding in a two hour volleyball workout that had been doubling as a emotional-meltdown.
“I’m giving you my key, and you give me yours,” Iwaizumi said, and Oikawa’s eyes widened but Iwaizumi continued before he could question anything, “So you can go to my room and take a shower, and I can get you some stuff from your room and clean up in here, if you don’t let me in when I get back to my room there I’m breaking up with you.” The threat was mocking, a sort of trying-to-keep-things-light tone. Even though he was basically telling Oikawa to let him take care of him, or at the very least clean up his mess.
Oikawa would have argued, but his half-lidded eyes and fully-felt exhaustion was starting to set in. He walked up and exchanged keys, no warth came from Oikawa’s touch, he brushed by Iwaizumi and started to walk out. His footsteps were loud and echoed throughout the room. Once he opened the door to the brisk November air, Oikawa’s shadow filled the space between them in an oddly daunting way, crisp against the wood.
There was something final in the way the door creaked to a close.
Now alone, Iwaizumi scanned the room, putting together how Oikawa had attempted to clear his mind. He had gotten out only one bag of volleyballs, he probably went through the whole bag serving one after another. Then once the bag was empty, he’d walk to the other side and re-fill the bag, only to repeat the process.
It was many things: A decent workout, a good way to dull thoughts, and a great way to exhaust himself.
As Iwaizumi walked around the blindingly bright room, he squinted at the windows by the ground and could see the dark outside. Slowly, he began picking up the fallen balls mulling over his own thoughts.
First thing first. Iwaizumi was going to have to make it clear to Oikawa that his main goal was to be beside him no matter what. Other thoughts and feelings had to come later. Iwaizumi admittedly couldn’t imagine trying to figure out everything, not on his first day of knowing about the pregnancy.
***
Oikawa liked rinsing off at Iwaizumis, he always had. Typically he had to beg to get Iwaizumi to let him. Iwaizumi’s single was just like Oikawa’s single, except it was a mirror image flip with Iwaizumi’s room had all the furniture on the left side. But most importantly Iwaizumi had a fully furnished attached bathroom, shower included, unlike Oikawa's.
The water felt amazing but it seemed to tire him out even more, his own body mocking him for over-doing it. His wet hair plastered to his face, he let his arms outstretch and grip the wall.
“I’m a mess.” Oikawa whispered to himself.
It wasn’t until Oikawa was stepping out of the shower that the realization came over him that he hadn’t actually taken a shower in a few days. Even then, he had been kinda in a daze since taking a pregnancy test at the beginning of the week. So itt could have been nearly a whole week since he had taken a shower like the one he had just had. One that felt refreshing and warm down to his bones.
As Oikawa began to dry off he couldn’t help but look down at himself. While he still had defined-enough abs, he couldn’t tell if they seemed softer. He could probably stare for hours and still have no idea if anything was changed, at least for sure.
He swallowed hard at the thought. Part of the idea of changing in that way was nightmare fuel, enough to be considered minor body horror, but the other half of him felt oddly moved by the idea.
He toweled the bathroom mirror, it only briefly unfogged but it still let Oikawa get a brief look at himself before the mirror clouded back over.
It seemed his lack of sleep had caught up with him physically. He hadn’t needed to look at his stomach for the proof of being pregnant, but his face. His eyes were veiny-red from previous emotions, and his lack of sleep left his under-eyes more defined, purpled. Before the last of the mirror fogged up, he noted that even his skin seemed pale and dulled.
Oikawa sighed pulling Iwaizumis fluffy towel around himself and turned into Iwaizumi’s room, much cleaner and focused than Oikawa’s own. Not only had he always been cleaner, Oikawa’s room had also suffered from the previous week, its owners freak-outs and dazed movements having done a number on its already slim level of cleanliness.
But Iwaizumi’s room was clear, everything had a clear spot, even his trash seemed mockingly modest. Oikawa found his small pile of things on the ground easily, then grabbed his phone and sent Iwaizumi a quick text.
OIKAWA: Is it okay if I change into some of your clothing??
Oikawa briefly wondered if he should wait, growing cold, before getting a text back nearly immediately.
IWAIZUMI: Go ahead, I’ll grab your toothbrush and a change of clothes for tomorrow.
IWAIZUMI: Also, do you need your laptop or any school things - or any other thing for that matter?
OIKAWA: No
OIKAWA: and thanks for this
IWAIZUMI: Anytime
Oikawa smiled at the text before he began looking for pj’s for the night. He pulled open the top drawer of Iwaizumi’s dresser. Oikawa groaned, reminded that Iwaizumi was a boxer's guy, at least it was just for the night, Oikawa thought. Then he more gladly pulled on a navy top and pair of gray sweatpants that seemed both comfortable and smelt of Iwaizumi’s laundry detergent.
***
Iwaizumi opened Oikawa’s dimly lit dorm room, Oikawa had left his desk lamp on, which only highlighted the mess. Letting every mess cast its own haunting shadow. Oikawa could be a scatter-brained person, but Iwaizumi had never seen his boyfriend's room like this before.
His trash bag laid lazily against his desk - full to an impressive amount. Oikawa was at the balancing stage with his trash. Clothing covered the floors, random drawers were left half-opened and were either stuffed full or nearly empty. He had a bin that had been pulled from under his bed (Judging by the way it wrinkled the rug) that had held all his heavy winter clothing. He must have pulled it out this week with the winter taking its first real turn for the worst.
Before getting Oikawa a change of clothing for tomorrow and his toothbrush, Iwaizumi took note of the tissue box on Oikawa’s bed, turned sideways and nearly empty.
***
Iwaizumi was met with the odd experience of having to knock on his own dorm room, but the door opens quickly. Oikawa’s expression seemed kind, if not tired, even if he wasn't exactly grinning.
“Hey you.” Iwaizumi said in a quiet voice.
“Hey.” Oikawa’s lip turned up.
Iwaizumi took note that Oikawa did seem better from the last time he saw him, adorably, his wet hair just starting to flip up slightly, and he seemed more relaxed in some of Iwaizumi’s clothing.
Oikawa hopped up onto Iwaizumi’s raised bed, leaning tiredly against the pillow propped against the wall.
“I also grabbed these,” Iwaizumi said, holding up Oikawa’s glasses, still standing at the door, Oikawa’s backpack half-hung on his shoulder.
“Right, I forgot.” Oikawa said, his words almost sounded normal. Low in energy, but the right tone.
“I figured.” Iwaizumi nodded, dropping the backpack by Oikawa’s small pile and walked over to his own bed, joining Oikawa. Sitting next to him as they both leaned against the (carbon-copy) college white brick walls. “Do you want to talk?” Iwaizumi asked.
Oikawa was careful not to look at Iwaizumi, he turned his head up slightly, eyeing the ceiling. Thinking over his answer. “Have you come up with an opinion Iwa?”
“Not really, but I’m with you on whatever.”
“That's a cop-out.” Oikawa turned back to his boyfriend.
“No it's not, I’d be an idiot to bet against you. Besides, you have an idea, right?”
“Yeah, I want to keep it but -” Oikawa's eyes broke away from Iwaizumi, “But I don’t want to talk about it tonight.”
“Okay,” Iwaizumi exhaled, half-grateful to have a better idea of what they were going to do, but half-horrified by the impending countdown to being a dad, “Like I said, I’m with you on this, okay?” he gripped Oikawa’s hand.
Oikawa nodded, then turned his eyes back to Iwaizumi, his eyes were glassy but somehow his tears didn’t brim over. “Can you just hold me?”
Iwaizumi briefly felt as if he had too small of a heart to hear something like that. But he nodded.
They began laying in the middle of the twin bed, so closely holding one another that the bed didn’t seem too small, as if the bed was mocking all their earlier arguments of hogging space, because now the bed seemed like just enough - even too much space. They didn’t even go under the covers, just pulling one of Iwaizumi’s smaller Christmas blankets over the both of them. Creating most of the warmth they needed and craved by Iwaizumi holding onto Oikawa.