Chapter 1: Preparations
Summary:
The Doctor makes plans to take Rose on a romantic getaway.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
There were hundreds of places that the Doctor wanted to take Rose Tyler. Thousands of places. Possibly more: he’d never bothered to count, and ideas for fabulous destinations and things she may love kept popping into his brain. He had offered her the whole of space and time as her playground, and the possibilities were infinite. So many beautiful things to show her, so many places, so many people to meet…
But for this trip, this all-important trip, he knew exactly where he needed to go. There wasn’t really much debate about it.
The date that marked he and Rose travelling together for a year had passed three days before, and he’d wanted to take her somewhere special - somewhere he could show her in some tangible way just what she meant to him, just how much he cared about her. But he’d lost his nerve and had the ready excuse of the TARDIS needing a refuel, so they’d gone to the time rift in Cardiff during Rose’s timeline, instead. And although things had ended well - very well for him, considering she’d kissed him - it was certainly not the fun and possibly romantic trip he’d hoped for on that day.
But now, three days after Margaret the Slitheen, Mickey, and Rose snogging the breath out of him, it was time for him to pull his head out of his arse and take her somewhere special. Somewhere meaningful. Somewhere he could finally tell her just what she meant to him.
And, yes, it was time to tell her. He really couldn’t conceal how he felt about her anymore, especially after they’d kissed in her room seventy-three hours, twelve minutes and fifteen seconds ago. He’d almost told her then, but his brain...it just… When she’d tugged him down by the lapels of his jacket and kissed him, she’d literally snogged him senseless. Neurons misfired everywhere until all he had been able to think of was Rose: the softness of her lips and the way his own lips slid against the lip gloss she wore; the way she made the tiniest little sounds of pleasure, need, and want when he’d deepened the kiss; the way his senses had been overpowered and confused by her scent surrounding him, and her taste in his mouth. He’d pondered on it later, at length, and finally concluded that she tasted of joy, eternity, spearmint and Rose. She smelled of promises, warmth, jasmine and... Rose. Rose was, by far, the sweetest taste and most enchanting scent he’d ever known.
It was time to tell her. Well past time, actually. Time to give her a symbol of what she meant to him. Nothing she’d find overwhelming, mind - he was still worried about scaring her away. The emotions she’d been unwittingly blaring out towards him spoke of commitment and permanence, and oh, gods, how he wanted that. The primal male in him had been roused and he often felt like those caricatures of cavemen in 20th century cartoons. They were inaccurate representations, sure, but they certainly reflected his state of mind when he was near her. He just wanted to drag her into his room of the TARDIS and keep her there. Forever.
His lip curled up at the corner when he thought of it. Rather domestic, that.
Too damn right it was. Domestics with Rose Tyler? A lot like bananas. Both were good.
But before anything else happened (and before he lost his nerve) the Doctor felt compelled to tell her just what she meant to him, what she’d done for him. In hindsight, he was glad he hadn’t blurted his feelings out to her when they were kissing on the way to Raxacoricofallapatorius. Any stupid ape could just blurt out how he felt without thought. He was the Doctor, Time Lord of Gallifrey, and most intelligent being in the cosmos. Surely he was above just bursting out with three little words that her species applied to everything from coffee to shoes to each other. No, Rose was worth more than that. She was worth a little forethought and a meaningful gesture. Something to help him explain to her that his feelings went far, far beyond a simple I love you. This went way beyond that trite, little word that humans throw around like confetti.
And given that they had just passed the one-year anniversary of the two of them travelling together, he’d decided to make it a special trip that she could participate in. He wouldn’t just shove some trinket in her hand. Again, that’s what normal blokes did. The Doctor was anything but a normal bloke. He and Rose were anything but a normal couple. They were...they were more than that. Better than that.
Well, not that they were a couple-couple, really...but they were a pair. Right? Sure they were. Everyone knew it. Everyone had seen it. Even on their very first trip together - a year ago now - people had assumed they were a couple. Jabe had called her his partner that day (among other things) and he’d denied it.
Now, though, after a year together, the Doctor knew he’d been wrong to dismiss the title that described Rose as his equal, not just his companion or ‘plus-one’. Rose had been his partner from the moment she took his hand in Henrik’s and ran with him. He couldn’t imagine life without her. A life without her wouldn’t be a life. They didn’t need to label their relationship in human terms, surely. They could just be the Doctor and Rose Tyler, a pair of time-travelers and explorers. No need to identify themselves to the universe as a pair, a couple.
The Doctor scoffed to himself. Sod that! Rose was a human. There weren’t any Time Lords left, and if there had been they wouldn’t have approved of what he was doing anyway. There was absolutely no reason not to give Rose the pleasure of a traditional human courtship from her time. In his species, there really wasn’t a lot of precedent for what they were doing anyway, so it would be rather pointless to force her to play by non-existent rules.
They were a couple. And if they weren’t, they would be. Soon. The Doctor was finished denying himself what he wanted and needed, the contact and happiness he craved every minute. He was done pretending that his misery and loneliness was just the way it was meant to be. He wanted Rose, she wanted him, and that was that. The universe could fuck off.
He grinned to himself a little ruefully. Sweet Rassilon, he was besotted. Not all that bothered by it, either, him. He’d found someone that made him happy, even though just a year ago all he’d wanted to do was to die and never regenerate. She’d brought sunshine into his life at the same time she coaxed him out of his misery. She did both without any effort, just by being….Rose.
Yep. He was in love, and not a bit fussed what anyone thought of it. Jack would, no doubt, never let him hear the end of it, would crow about his matchmaking prowess for years. But Jack could fuck off, too.
It was time to tell Rose.
Mind made up, he set the coordinates for medieval Kyoto and called out to Rose and Jack.
~*~O~*~
The TARDIS had taken to Rose quite a bit, if her living quarters were any indication.
Rose’s room had started out looking like something of a hotel room: a single bed with some spartan furniture, all in neutral colors. Her bathroom had been similarly sterile, with just a shower stall, sink, and toilet. Rose hadn’t minded. She’d just been excited to come along on the trip.
It had been a surprise to her when she came into her room after she’d been traveling with the Doctor for a week or so and found that her bed was larger and covered with a duvet and pillows in a light turquoise color, accented with gold satin. A week or so after that, she discovered that her loo had been similarly upgraded. Two weeks later, she found two windows in her expanding room with a view of beautiful landscapes by day and the magnificent cosmos at night. And the expansion and upgrades still continued at the TARDIS’ leisure.
Today, her room was nearly as big as her mum’s flat. The large canopy bed still featured the same duvet, which was now matched by curtains on her windows and throw rugs all over the now-parquet floor. The TARDIS had provided her with a fireplace, bookcases and a pair of snuggly armchairs. Her en suite was large, now sporting a garden tub, spacious shower stall, and vanity to the right of the sink, all the surfaces being marble. A window appeared over the garden tub, which Rose had been hesitant about until she noticed the TARDIS shading the window every time she disrobed, then opening it again as soon as her modesty was preserved in the tub. Plush ivory and black towels were always available, always warmed, and always ready for her.
It would be nearly impossible to pin down the most impressive thing that the TARDIS had done for her, but her most recent addition was certainly in the running. Rose had spent a fair amount of time in the wardrobe room, playing dress-up or getting ready at the Doctor’s instruction. When she’d first arrived on the TARDIS, her closet had been a chifferobe against one wall. Over the course of the last year, it had grown from a chifferobe to a proper closet to a walk-in closet to nearly a dressing room. In the past month or so, the TARDIS had just begun bringing a selection of clothes for Rose directly to her closet, saving her the trip to the wardrobe room.
It was there in her expansive closet that she stood now, looking at the multiple silk and embroidered garments that were hanging there, waiting for her to choose.
“Knock, knock,” she heard from the doorway.
“Come in, Jack.”
“Where are you?”
“In the closet!”
Jack came around the corner and leaned against the door, grinning at her. “Well that’s no way to live,” he said with a grin. “You should totally come out of there.”
“Haha, Jack, very clever,” she said rolling her eyes and elbowing him. “You’re funny.”
“I try.”
“What’s he doing, Jack?” she asked without preamble.
Jack didn’t need any explanation to her question. He gave her a cheeky, knowing grin. “I think I have a pretty good idea. And he wants it to be just the two of you.”
Rose felt a jolt in her abdomen at these words. “Why?”
Jack snorted and stepped into the large closet with her, reaching for the sleeve of the nearest garment. “You don’t need to be coy with me, Rose. You know why he wants you to himself.”
“You think?” she nearly squeaked.
He chuckled without looking up from the racks he was sorting through. “Oh, yes. It’s time.”
Rose swallowed hard, willing her heart rate to slow down. She’d wanted this, wanted the Doctor for almost the entire year they’d traveled together. Month after month of soft touches and yearning looks had passed before she’d just thrown caution to the wind and finally kissed him, caving to the impulse when they were leaving Cardiff with Blon Fel Fotch in egg form. Apparently he’d thought, until that day, that she still wanted Mickey, and she’d felt a strong need to disabuse him of that notion. They’d only kissed, but oh, those kisses. She was both starved for more and sure she could live off the memory of his lips on hers for the eternity of time and space.
Rose had expected that everything would be different after they kissed, but she’d been terribly disappointed when it didn’t happen again. For the most part, they went back to the way they had been for months before - but there was an increase of heated glances, fingers lingering in each other's hands a bit longer than usual, and clandestine, knowing smiles. The feeling in the air was one of anticipation and excitement. It wasn’t a question of if they would come together again, it was a matter of who would flip the lever first.
Now the Doctor wanted to go to Kyoto. Jack was coming along, but the Doctor had made it clear that he could find some entertainment of his own. The implications were dizzying and Rose was afraid to believe them: the Doctor and Rose would be alone together, and he had planned it that way. A thrill shot down her spine at the very thought, and her heart raced.
“You should wear the pink one.” Jack burst into her thoughts and Rose jumped.
“Hmm?”
“The pink one,” Jack repeated, lifting the traditional garment from the racks. “It’s a good color on you.”
“What do I do, Jack?” she burst out.
“What do you do?” Jack gave a lewd smile. “You do that Time Lord. Do him for both of us.”
“Oh, stop.” She swatted his arm, blushing. “You know what I mean.”
The lothario Time Agent gave her a warm smile. “Quit biting your thumb, for one.”
Rose dropped her hand and immediately began chewing on her lip. Jack laughed and took her by the shoulders.
“Rosie, hon. Relax. We’re talking about the Doctor here. There’s nothing to be afraid of.”
“I’m not afraid,” she protested, not meeting his eyes.
“You’re nervous.”
Rose nodded and Jack pulled her into a warm hug. “Oh, Rosie,” he sighed with his chin resting on the top of her head. “I envy you. The man you’re in love with is in love with you and taking you on a romantic trip. You two are going to be so happy now that you’re pulling your heads out of your asses. I’ve never seen a couple that are more perfect for each other than the two of you.”
“We’re not a couple, Jack,” she muttered into his chest through sudden tears, the origin of which confused her.
“Bullshit. You’re more of a couple than any two people I’ve ever known.”
“What if he’s taking me somewhere as a farewell trip or something?” she cried irrationally. “What if he says kissing me was a mistake?”
“Never happen,” Jack reassured her. He kissed the top of her head and pushed her back, smiling at her bracingly. “Now, get dressed! You have a romantic getaway to get to, and I have to get myself ready to make some lucky medieval Japanese courtesans very, very happy.”
Rose blushed again. “You’re incorrigible,” she admonished.
“You love me anyway.”
Notes:
For those of you who like to see what you're reading about (I know I like a visual aid...)
Rose's closet (but imagine much more pink)
Chapter 2: An Evening in Kyoto
Summary:
The Doctor attempts to tell Rose how he feels while they visit Kyoto.
Notes:
I know virtually nothing of Japanese history, but a visit to Kyoto was very important to this story. I did a little research into this period and tried to incorporate it as best I could. I don't know of anything wrong (in this chapter), but I'm more than certain that there are glaring mistakes. I'm sorry for any you come across!
Once again, the biggest, hugest thanks go to tenroseforeverandever who is a saint.
For links to visual references, please see the end notes.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Kyoto was stunning. Absolutely beautiful.
They had landed in the gardens of what Rose learned quickly was the palace (or bakufu) of Ashikaga Yoshimasa, the Shogun of Japan, and she had a hard time believing that anything so beautiful could actually exist on earth. The trees were cottony pink with cherry blossoms, falling like snow all over when the breeze hit the branches. She could see several other types of tree, but the ones who caught her eye were the weeping willows, whose soft branches swayed in the light wind. Small benches and temples were navigated by narrow paths that wove themselves around the garden, and short bridges crossed the small stream in graceful arches.
Even Jack seemed impressed.
Rose looked over her shoulder to see the TARDIS sitting in the corner of the garden, pink petals falling all around her. Rose hoped that if danger lurked in these gardens, it would remain hidden long enough for her and the Doctor to appreciate just how beautiful the surroundings were. In an even more private thought, she hoped that Jack had been right and the Doctor had brought here specifically for the undeniably romantic setting.
The Shogun himself had come out to the gardens to welcome the trio, and upon the initial greeting Jack had made himself conspicuously scarce. The Doctor and Rose glanced at each other then away, smiling, while Jack scarpered and the Shogun went on in effusive greeting.
“Doctor, my old friend,” he said as he released the Doctor from an embrace. “You and your wife honor us with your presence.”
Rose felt her heart sputter at the word ‘wife’. She’d been called his wife (and other things) before, of course, but not since The Kiss. The word seemed to carry more weight this time. She wondered if the Doctor could feel her heart rate spike beneath where his fingers curled around her hand.
The Doctor didn’t blink at the title, although he squeezed Rose’s hand with just the slightest pressure. She wondered whether he was trying to reassure her or himself. Or perhaps he was telling her to ‘just go with it’ and not argue. It didn’t matter, really, what he’d intended. The signal was clear: they were to pretend to be husband and wife on this trip.
“It’s good to see you, old friend. I hope you are well?” the Doctor asked politely.
“Quite,” Yoshimasa said pleasantly.
“And no trouble with smoking mountains since I left?”
“None at all, Doctor!”
“Fantastic!” the Doctor said with a broad grin.
Yoshimasa looked a bit confused. “Was there not one more in your party? Another companion?”
“Ah, yes,” the Doctor said, a bit flustered. “My friend Jack, he... he likes to explore.”
Rose brought her hand to her mouth to stifle the giggle that had bubbled up and the Doctor squeezed her hand again. Behave.
“Please forgive him his rudeness, your majesty,” the Doctor went on.
The Shogun waved a dismissive hand. “Not at all. You, your companion and your lovely bride are most welcome, Doctor. My kingdom is open to you as long and as often as you wish to visit, and I hope you will consider the bakufu your home for as long as you like, until you must move on. Your welcome will not wane.”
The Doctor bowed formally, observing proper etiquette. “Thank you, majesty.”
Rose nodded from the Doctor’s shoulder, her hand still firmly held in his.
“Splendid!” Yoshimasa said, chuffed. “To what do we owe this visit?”
“I would like to show Rose,” he paused and indicated her, “about kintsugi.”
“Ah, excellent,” Yoshimasa said. “Our pottery is the best in the world, after all.”
Pottery? thought Rose. The Doctor beamed down at her and she smiled back, her lip between her teeth. She hoped that she’d been able to hide the disappointment that had welled in her when she heard the word ‘pottery’. She’d started to let herself daydream about time alone with the Doctor, what may happen and what it may mean. She’d envisioned the two of them in romantic embraces, maybe him murmuring declarations into her ear...something. But, again, she’d been wrong. The Doctor was as he always was - readying himself to teach her something.
Rose almost always loved when the Doctor gave her instructional lectures. She loved learning, and he was, by far, the most intelligent being she’d ever known. There was so much to learn from him, and she tried to soak up every bit.
But this once...just this once...she’d been hoping that he wouldn’t try to teach her anything. She wasn’t interested in a lecture on medieval Japanese pottery. She didn’t want to hear what he knew, she wanted to hear what he felt.
The Shogun was oblivious to her turmoil and went on with his greeting. “But first,” he declared, “We dine! A feast is being prepared in your honor, and our finest rooms are yours. My wife, Hino Tomiko, will take your wife to be prepared for the feast once you have selected rooms.”
Rose shot a look up at the Doctor. Being taken to be prepared for dinner made Rose feel a bit like a turkey to be roasted, but the Doctor smiled reassuringly down at her, then bent to her ear. “You’re to be taken with her majesty to relax and get ready for the feast. It’s a great honor.”
Oh. Well, that didn’t seem so bad.
As he pulled away from her Rose nodded and returned his smile, which seemed to have transformed from one of encouragement to something much more… heated? Possessive? She didn’t have a name for it, but she liked it.
“Rose will be delighted,” the Doctor told Yoshimasa.
The smaller man clapped his hands like a child. “Excellent! Let us go prepare!”
The Doctor bowed to him and put Rose’s hand in the crook of his elbow as he followed the smaller man.
~*~O~*~
As it turned out, getting ready for a feast with the wife of the Shogun was much less about pampering and relaxation and more about beautification. Rose was in no way opposed to feeling beautiful, but she had to admit that by the time she was stood in front of the doors with the Yoshimasa’s wife and other courtiers, she was quite exhausted.
She had been manicured, massaged, and made up, then dressed in an elaborate gown deemed suitable for the wife of a noble in the court. It sprung to her lips automatically to protest that she wasn’t in fact the Doctor’s wife, but thankfully Tomiko promptly talked right over her. It was just as well, Rose thought. She may have been shoved further down the social ladder otherwise. There was no telling how their relationship would be viewed here.
Their relationship that she thought (hoped) was about to change on this trip.
When she peered into the mirror just before leaving to go to the feast with Tomiko, Rose couldn’t help but be impressed with her own appearance. The gown she'd been given looked a bit like the kimono that Rose had anticipated, but was much more. It did not have the floral pattern she expected, was instead solid white with wide bands of crimson silk. A large blossom sat at her waist, at the end of three crimson sashes and on each sleeve, and gold silk trim adorned the edge of every bit of fabric. She looked...regal. Preparations for the feast had really just been several hours of doing as she was told, but the end result was beautiful - even if she only looked a bit like herself. The gown she’d been given to wear was heavy and magnificent, and Tomiko had had her own attendants perform double duties to get Rose ready, so her hair was perfectly styled.
Rose had caused quite a sensation with her painted fingernails and toenails, and even as she stood in front of the mirror now the attendants would occasionally reach up to touch her blonde hair before pulling away, telling her how beautiful she was, how exotic.
Rose did feel beautiful and exotic at that moment. She worried her lip in a smile, wondering what the Doctor would think.
“You are a special woman, Rose,” Tomiko said, picking at Rose’s dress in a way that reminded Rose of her mother.
“I am lucky, highness,” she answered.
“Yes, you are,” the beautiful young aristocrat agreed. “The gods smile upon you. You’ve a goddess within.”
It sounded like some platitude that she and her girlfriends told each other when they were feeling low, and Rose assumed that the Shogun’s wife was simply addressing her anxiety with kindness and reassurance.
“Thank you, your highness,” she said politely, inclining her head.
“You do not understand me, Rose,” Tomiko told her firmly but not without kindness, in a steady voice. “A goddess howls within you like the wolf, waiting to be released. Benevolence and wrath, truth and compassion, love and justice: all swirl and shine in your eyes with a light too bright to be of this world. You...you glow.”
Rose froze. ’Like the wolf.’ The wolf again. Mentions of a wolf seemed to follow them wherever they went. Where was all of this coming from?
Confusion and something a little like fear left her flustered, and Rose wasn’t quite sure how to reply. Finally, after a long, agonizing moment, she settled on, “thank you, majesty.” She couldn’t think of anything else to say - there really wasn’t anything.
Tomiko grasped Rose’s hands. “I do hope that you’ll forgive me my insight. I cannot always control it. And please, call me Tomiko.”
Rose nodded, stammering. “Of course. Thank you, Tomiko.”
Tomiko squeezed her hand gently. “Come. Let us go to meet our husbands, and see if your companion has returned from ...exploring.”
The conspiratorial wink that Tomiko gave Rose made her laugh, knowing that the other woman was under no illusions about what Jack was up to. “Yeah, alright then. Let’s.” Rose didn’t take to formal speech very well, but only a slightly raised eyebrow from the great lady was needed before she caught herself and corrected the slip. “I mean, yes, your majesty - Tomiko.”
~*~O~*~
The Doctor had forgotten that the Shogun kept his dining arrangements segregated by sex, meaning that he had very little time to speak to Rose before they were each escorted to different areas of the large hall. Not that he would have been able to say much to her, anyway: she’d left him speechless when she came into the room so exquisitely dressed. But that was just so …Rose, wasn’t it? Every time he thought he had her figured out, she would surprise him. Every time he’d thought he’d seen her as beautiful as she could possibly be, she blew him away.
Rose was surrounded by chattering women, all of them influential in the Court and all of them seemingly taken with his companion. Some of the women reached up to touch Rose’s hair several times, and Rose seemed outwardly pleased with the attention. The Doctor saw, however, with the eyes that knew nearly every expression on her beautiful face, that she was growing a bit weary of it all, that her patience with her role as a curiosity was wearing thin. It worried him; he had no fear that Rose would do anything unforgivably inappropriate, but he worried after her comfort and peace of mind. When she caught him watching her she sent him a small smile, her bottom lip between her teeth. He wasn’t sure what he did in return, but he was sure that it adequately revealed him as the besotted fool that he was.
But even though she was an object of intense curiosity and the occasional uninvited, awe-stricken touch, Rose handled herself with supreme poise and grace. She smiled and the other women smiled with her. She made a comment and the other women tittered their approval. His little human was the center of attention amongst the highest of nobility. Just as it should be, he thought. He was so proud of her - he always was.
He saw her excuse herself after dinner before the dancing and poetry reading and leave the hall, strolling in the direction of the gardens. The Doctor was still being monopolized by the Shogun and his discussion of cultural improvements he’d brought about in his kingdom, but interrupted their discussion long enough to ask a guard to follow Rose discreetly. He assumed she needed some breathing room after being treated as an exotic oddity for several hours. He could give her that.
He would give her anything.
But when she hadn’t come back in a half hour, the Doctor excused himself and headed into the gardens after her. Jack stopped him on the way, raising a hand in salute.
“Where have you been?” the Doctor growled.
Jack, as always, was unrepentant. “Oh, I met some lovely tea attendants. Very friendly.”
“Jack, we are at the court of a Shogun, enjoying his hospitality,” the Doctor warned.
“I know how to play this game, Doctor. I won’t create a fuss.”
The Doctor nodded, and Jack followed his line of vision.
“Rose went for a walk?”
“Yeah.”
“Don’t let me keep you." Jack made a shooing motion with his hands when the Doctor hesitated. "Go, Doc. I’ll cover for you.”
The Doctor looked at Jack with annoyance mixed with gratitude, then bit off a quick “thanks” before he stepped out onto the veranda.
~*~O~*~
He spotted her immediately; the moon was full and bright in clear sky, dappling the garden in a silver glow. Rose’s blonde hair glowed with reflected moonlight and tendrils from her traditional updo wafting around her face as she meandered over one of the small bridges. The Doctor’s hearts tripped over themselves at the sight of her, glowing goddess that she was.
It’s time, he told himself. Go tell her. Now is the moment.
He swallowed hard and started towards her.
~*~O~*~
She’d heard him coming, of course she had, but it was still a surprise when he stopped just before joining her on the bridge and spoke.
“A bit too much excitement?” he asked gently.
She smiled at him. “I’m better now.”
“Are you sure? I can go…” He gestured behind him towards the palace.
“No,” she blurted out, stepping forward and reaching a bit before she pulled herself back self-consiously. “Please, stay.” She felt his smile all the way down to her toes. “Come with me?” she asked, her voice a bit higher than normal. “There’s a little pool over here by the big willow. Do you think it has fish in it, like the stream?”
“Probably,” he mused, offering her his hand in what she hoped was a romantic gesture to help her to step off the bridge. She took it and the Doctor turned his hand just a bit, entwining her fingers with his, stroking his thumb over the back of hers. Rose’s breath caught excitedly and she thanked the night for covering her blush. Hand in hand they drifted toward the little pool she’d indicated.
The breeze had picked up just a touch when the sun went down, and the willow branches swirled around each other. Their slow fluidity reminded Rose a bit of the way her skirts had flowed around her legs the few times the Doctor had taken her to a ball and danced with her. He would hold her close, enveloping her senses, leaving little room for her to think about anything else. There was no music, they weren't on a dance floor, and he merely had his fingers laced with hers, but Rose still felt utterly, wonderfully surrounded by him.
She squeezed the Doctor’s hand in delight when they got to the tiny pond and peered in. “There are fish, Doctor. Look.”
“Those are koi,” he said, his voice a bit quieter than usual.
“The white ones look like they’re glowing,” Rose said.
“The Japanese believe that the coloring on each fish indicate your fortune.”
Rose peered into the dark, sparking water in the tiny pool and spotted a mostly black koi. It was beautiful; alluring, but a bit unsettling. Rose pointed to it. “Does that one mean death?”
The Doctor shook his head. “No, although I can see why you would think that. That’s a kumonryu, and it’s a portent of big changes upcoming in your life. Transformations.”
A little pulse of electricity raced through her veins, and she fought to control the trembling she felt when she pointed out the only other fish they could see right then in the dark water, this one white and sporting reddish spots.
“What does that one mean, Doctor?” she asked, her voice so low she wondered for a second if she’d actually said anything out loud.
“That’s the kuchibeni,” the Doctor answered her tenderly. “Legend has it that the kuchibeni brings love. Long-lasting love.”
Rose felt her eyes prick with unexpected tears. She blinked them back hurriedly, not wanting to take the time to analyze why her emotions were bubbling to the surface just now, and said the first thing she could think of that seemed appropriate.
“S’beautiful, Doctor.”
The Doctor hummed an agreement. “Yes. Beautiful.”
Rose flicked her eyes up to see that he wasn’t looking down at the little pond, watching the fish, he was looking at her. The intensity in his eyes startled her, and she drew a tiny gasp.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
“S’alright.”
“You’re safe with me, Rose. I’ll never hurt you. I promise.”
Rose blinked up at him, surprised that he even felt like he needed to tell her such a thing. She trusted him implicitly: she never doubted him with her health, with her life, with her heart - with anything. Even though the gardens were bathed in light from the heavens, his eyes remained dark and Rose could see the urgent plea in them for her to believe him. His vulnerability was unsettling, and Rose sought to reassure him. She slipped her other hand into his. “Of course you wouldn’t, Doctor.”
“Rose,” he began, then floundered, his mouth opening and closing a bit before he pursed his lips in frustration and looked down at her. “I, er...” he tried again. The second false start had him clenching his jaw and looking at her helplessly for a minute, as if willing her to read his thoughts and spare him whatever he was trying to say. With a sigh that sounded both resigned and determined, he released her hands.
“Have I ever told you about wabi-sabi?” he asked, reaching into his pocket.
Rose shook her head at him.
“It’s a Japanese philosophy; it basically means embracing damage and imperfection as part of a whole. They believe that the damage tells a story, and because of that the damaged item, made whole again, is even more beautiful than the original.” Rose nodded her understanding and he continued, “Wabi sabi says that just because something is broken, it’s not suddenly useless or ugly. Instead, the damage becomes part of that object’s aesthetic. Imperfection is something to be celebrated and embraced, not lamented and grieved.”
Rose nodded up at him again, trying hard to focus on what he was saying and not the way the willow branches cast dancing shadows across his beloved, angular face.
The Doctor paused in his discourse and pulled out a small turquoise-colored bowl covered in gold lines, criss-crossing it in every direction. He looked at it in his hand for a moment before he went on. “This tea bowl was shattered. Broken into pieces. The vast majority of all of space and time would have seen it as nothing more than shards of glass and tossed them in the rubbish. Maybe said a little something about what a shame it was for such a pretty bowl. But it would be ugly and have no function, so they’d’ve binned it.
“But the Japanese... they embrace breakage as a chance to make something good. So they take those shards of broken pottery and repair them, welding the parts together with gold, like so. When they are finished, you have this.”
The Doctor looked down at his hand again, then offered it to her. “It’s called kintsugi, or sometimes kintsukuroi. Repairing with gold.”
“Beautiful,” Rose murmured, looking at the small bowl in her hands.
“It’s me,” the Doctor said softly, and she snapped her head up to look at him. “I mean, metaphorically.” Rose thought she could see where he was headed, but wasn’t entirely sure. She waited.
“When I found you, Rose, I was a shattered mess of a man. I wanted to die. I didn’t want to go on. I was hopeless.
“But you, Rose Tyler...” He paused, taking the bowl from her hands and sitting it down on the bench beside them. He took her hands in his again and went on: “You fixed me. You took all of that damaged mess you found and put me back together, my golden girl. And because of you, I’m better than I ever dreamed I could be.”
“Doctor -”
“I love you, Rose.” The words stumbled and fell from his lips before she could interrupt and give him time to lose his nerve.“I didn’t expect to and didn’t want to - God knows I fought it…” Rose’s eyebrows knit a little at this revelation, but he rubbed his thumb along the back of her hand and continued, his Northern voice warm and melodic, “but that was just daft. You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me in nine hundred years. Loving you, Rose, it... ” He struggled for a second before he found the right words. “It’s beauty - you’re beauty on a level I never understood before. Like this little bowl. It’s wonderful. It’s amazing. It’s fantastic!”
Rose huffed a watery little laugh at the use of his signature word, then wiped a stray tear away quickly. He grasped her hand again as soon as it was available.
“You are wonderful and amazing and fantastic, Rose. You’re perfect.”
“I’m hardly perfect,” she protested.
“You’re perfect, Rose,” he said, bringing his hands up to cup her face. “There has never been anyone in this universe so flawless, never anyone so absolutely… perfect for me as you. And I want nothing - nothing in all of space and time - more than I want to be with you every moment I can.”
Another tear fell onto Rose’s cheek, and the Doctor wiped it away with his thumb, offering her a tender smile.
“I love you and I want to be with you, Rose.”
His voice was low and quiet, private, when he repeated the words she’d never dared to dream of, and if she hadn’t watched them spilling from his mouth in that beautiful Northern cadence, she never would have believed him capable of saying such things. She’d known that he cared about her, but this went beyond any of her wildest dreams.
The shadows made by the willow branches continued to flit across his face, but there was something in his eyes that couldn’t be touched by either the dark of the night around them or the light from the heavens above them. It was intense. It burned. It was all the Doctor. All for Rose.
“Is that alright?” he whispered.
She expelled the breath she’d been holding with a happy sound and nodded at him from between his hands. “Yeah. S’alright.”
She didn’t have time to smile before he was kissing her, softly at first then slanting his mouth over hers with barely-there restraint. She brought her arms up and laid her hands on his shoulders. He moaned a little and parted her lips with his own. Rose sighed into the kiss and he brought his hands to her waist.
The kiss grew more heated when Rose slid her small hand around his neck and carded her fingers through his short hair. She felt something in him give way, some restraint, and he hauled her body flush against his. Clearly, he wanted her as close to him as possible. She shared that desire and, to that end, she wound her arms around his neck and pulled their bodies impossibly closer. She took the sigh he gave into her mouth as approval and took on a bit more of an aggressive role, exploring his mouth and nibbling his lower lip.
The Doctor groaned and broke away. “We have to stop, or I may try to make love to you right here, right now.”
Rose’s heart was pounding wildly and she was immensely grateful for his body supporting hers, “Well, I’ll agree that the 'right here' bit is a little problematic, but what’s wrong with right now?”
As if to answer her, a voice called out to the Doctor from the terrace of the palace and he groaned. “It’s the Shogun. I left just as he was starting to natter on about the tea blends he’d had created.”
“We have to go back?”
“We should,” he said, then sighed and lay his forehead against hers. “But damned if I want to leave.”
Rose grinned and bit her lip, an idea hitting her. “Doctor?”
“Hmm?”
“We’re expected to do some dancing tonight, aren’t we?”
Something flashed behind the Doctor’s eyes and Rose felt a thrill run down her spine.
“Inside, I mean. At the feast.”
“We are,” he said in a low voice.
“Are... are the wives of the nobles and guests of the bakufu separated like at dinner? Even at night?”
The Doctor’s eyes darkened perceptibly. “No. You and I will be escorted to the same place when we want to retire for the night. If..." He paused deliberately before he finished. "If you want.”
Rose looked down at his jumper, the darkest possible green in the moonlight. She settled both hands on his chest, one hand over each heart, and bit her lip. Then she looked up at him through her lashes. “Well,” she said in what she hoped was a seductive voice, “why don’t you and I go do what’s expected of us for a while. Then... then we can go to bed.”
“Rose,” he almost groaned. “You can’t mean…”
“Or not,” she said hastily, looking back down at her hands. “I mean, we don’t have to. If you don’t want -”
He stopped her mouth with his own, nipping and sucking lightly at her lips before he pulled away and put his forehead back to hers. “I want. Oh, yes, I want, Rose. Very much. I want you.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
Rose looked up at him from beneath her lashes again. “I think you know how I feel about you, Doctor.”
“Tell me. Please. I need to hear it.”
She smiled and ducked her eyes for a minute, gathering courage. Time to lay all her cards on the table, she supposed. He'd been honest with her and laid himself bare, much to her heart's delight. Her being candid about her feelings and telling him she loved him, too, felt like protecting him, in a way. It was nerve wracking, but she was more than happy to reassure him. “I want to be with you, Doctor. And...I want to be with you. Always. Only you. Forever you. I love you.”
His mouth captured hers again with searing intensity, earning a little whimper from her. The kiss was heated, nearly frenzied, with hands beginning to roam and tug at clothing until they heard Yoshimasa call out again from the terrace. He pulled back with a sigh. “We should go back.”
“Yeah.”
“Later?”
Rose nodded, touching her tongue to her lip as she did.
“Rose?” he asked.
“Yeah?”
He grabbed her hand and smiled manically. “Run.”
Notes:
For some visual reference:
This is the garden the Doctor and Rose stroll through.
Here is Rose's gown.
This is a kumonryu.
These are kuschibeni.
Here is the bowl the Doctor gave Rose, an example of kintsugi (or kintsukuroi).
This is an explanation of what kintsugi is.
The next chapter will be posted on 12/24 and will be NSFW. ;)
Chapter 3: A Night in Kyoto
Summary:
Oh Rose, his Rose, savior of his universe. He was holding the greatest treasure in the whole of reality as she slept, and well he knew it. She was precious, priceless, and all his. She’d demanded him in return but that point was moot. He’d been hers for months, probably since he first lay eyes on her in that cluttered basement.
Notes:
Merry Christmas! Here, have some introspection and smut, with bonus gloating!Jack.
I have a version of this chapter with the smut edited out, if you would prefer to read it, please PM me.
All the thanks in the world to tenroseforeverandever, my beta.
Chapter Text
Rose stirred against him, and the Doctor took advantage of the moment to change his own position and get closer to her. With gentle nudges and soft pressure, he shepherded her into lying on her side with her back against his chest and her thighs against his. Her head rested on his outstretched arm and he nuzzled into the nape of her neck blissfully, slipping his other arm around her waist to anchor her to him.
The Doctor had spent most of his 900 years chasing experiences. He’d sought adventure in every way he could think of, on every planet he’d visited. He’d learned languages and cultures, met untold numbers of people, influenced countless events across time and space. He’d toppled regimes, halted wars, explored uncharted lands, been worshipped as a god, and reviled as a demon. He’d had friends, enemies, and the rare lover.
He’d had a hell of a good time.
Then the Time War had come along, and he’d transformed from lonely, wandering adventurer to hardened warrior out of necessity. Before the Time War, he’d thought he’d seen death and destruction. And he actually had; he’d seen it in spades. But it had always been impersonal. Those fates had befallen peoples and cultures inferior to the Time Lords: less advanced and much less...important. At least, that’s what he’d been groomed to believe by the Time Lords themselves. Those other cultures and planets were hardly more than the scurrying of ants to them. The Doctor had broken the rules of his people time and again to help other species he felt needed him, but the niggling voice at the back of his mind was never far away, telling him that these lesser beings were not worth his efforts. Despite his deep-seated teachings, he'd put himself in a position of being exiled to Earth by his own people for breaking their policy of non-interference.
The Doctor had never regretted his actions. He had done good work for those planets and people and he was glad he’d done it; peace was never not worth it, he believed. But it had all been a bit of a lark, really. With the exception of Earth, his pet planet, he’d had no stake in any of these conflicts beyond his knowledge of time. If a couple of warring factions on a backwater planet eradicated themselves, what was it to him?
But then the Daleks had come and he’d been forced to defend his own people, to watch Gallifreyan blood spill when he wasn’t fast enough or clever enough to stop it. Friends from his youth and members of his family died before his very eyes.
Detachment wasn’t possible for him anymore, and the Time War was far from a lark. This time, it was personal. The war had wounded him, had changed him fundamentally. He’d had some awareness of it at the time - an awareness that grew with each death. He was not proud of his naive beliefs about his home and people being called into question, or his faith being shattered. His impulse had been, as it always was, to run away. Still, he’d fought as was expected of him. He stood for Gallifrey.
Then, when it seemed hopeless, he’d been compelled to do the unthinkable. He’d found himself in a position where it was necessary for him to not only wipe out all of the Daleks, but to end everything. To light Gallifrey like kindling and watch it burn. To watch all of them perish.
He’d done it. Peace was always worth the price.
It had broken him. He’d wished over and over, with a fervency that only the desperate can understand, for his own death. He’d attempted to seek it out. It hadn’t come, hadn’t been allowed.
Instead, after the TARDIS had refused to let him end it all, he’d found this little human cowering in a basement corner, and everything had changed in that one little blink of time’s eye.
She’d been a miracle, Rose had. She’d been the gold that repaired the shattered remnants of him, putting him back together slowly and painstakingly. Her kindness and compassion had been more than a just balm when his soul had been flayed alive - she’d healed him and made him better than he ever was before.
Despite sentencing himself to a life of guilt and misery after he’d ended the war, Rose refused to permit him that. She’d brought him out of his shell and showed him how to live again. She’d taught him to love: not the taboo, aloof fondness he’d always experienced before, when he’d followed the Time Lords’ protocols regarding social interactions with lesser beings. Instead, Rose had taught him to love completely, wholly.
It was only once he found Rose that he’d realized that he had never truly loved before. He would never deny the affection he’d felt for his friends and companions, the people who had come before and during the war. He’d enjoyed the times he’d had with them and the handful of lovers he’d taken in nine hundred years. But always, always, he’d maintained a tight grip on his emotions with those people. He’d allowed himself to feel warmth and tenderness for them, but he’d refused to lose himself to those who held his affections. He may have been a renegade and a rebel, but he was still a Time Lord and was expected to be austere. Detached.
But he’d lost himself to Rose Tyler. She didn’t just hold his affections, she commanded them. His hearts were held in her small, soft hands, for her to do with them as she pleased. For some unfathomable reason, she’d handed her heart to him as well. Him. The Doctor. A broken old man who left destruction and chaos in his wake. She’d trusted him with her love, her faith, and her body. And he’d done the same.
The Doctor loved Rose recklessly and with abandon. It hadn’t started that way. He’d resisted and denied the way she made him feel, his Academy training insisting that what he was doing was wrong. Shameful. But he could feel no shame in loving Rose. She was...everything to him, and he needed her.
He had discovered that his will to resist her faded with every innocent touch until he was utterly addicted to her. He’d looked for reasons to hold her hand, to hug her. Her skin against his became his drug and he found himself seeking excuses to get a fix. He’d hugged her in celebration and sorrow, and eventually just because... She’d snuggled against him in the library when they would read or watch telly and he’d thought that maybe - maybe - that would be enough, that he would be able to survive with just the feeling of her snug and warm against him and not need any more. He’d thought that maybe, if he tried hard enough, he could control his desperate need for her.
But what started as Rose pressed into his side with his arm casually thrown around her had led to her burrowing closer to him and falling asleep, and him lying back instead of waking her. The Doctor had known, in the nights that she rested on him (she always lay with her legs curled beneath her, her torso sprawled comfortably atop him, snoring softly with her cheek resting over one heart and her hand resting over the other) that he was fighting a losing battle. There would be no compromise with himself, no point at which he would ever be satisfied. He was captivated by her. Totally enraptured, him. And the only thing that would ever make that bearable was if she were just as gone for him as he was for her.
He’d craved more: craved all of her. And last night, he thought he would finally be able to satisfy his need, but instead he found that each taste only made him long for yet more.
Sampling her lips only made him long to taste the soft, creamy column of her neck. Then he’d had to nip at her collarbones and trace his tongue over the place where they created the hollow of her throat to satisfy his own curiosity. He’d needed to know what the skin on the tops of her breasts felt like when he parted his lips and kissed her there. He’d explored her, sampled her, until he reached the very core of her. He would never be able to get enough of Rose Tyler.
The Doctor’s arm tightened around her waist as he thought of the way they’d made love just hours ago. She’d been shy and wanton in turn, and it had made him wild to claim her. Always, in the past, sex had been a thing to be enjoyed quietly, on rare occasions, and with no small amount of guilt. He’d allowed himself to slacken the iron grip on his mind and body in those times, but not to release it entirely. He’d never let himself go in such a shameful act.
Last night had been different. Just as he’d lost his hearts to Rose and adored her, he’d similarly lost his will to Rose and made love to her with headlong abandon.
The Doctor smiled into her hair now when he remembered how she’d pleaded with him as he’d licked her, how utter filth had poured from her sweet lips when he thrust his fingers in and out of her. He’d written his name with his tongue in English, Gallifreyan, and as many other languages as he could think of, intending to declare her as his and none other’s. He remembered the way she’d screamed his name when he curled his fingers in her and sucked hard, sending her spiraling into oblivion.
He smirked to himself now, just as he had a few hours ago, remembering how boneless and sated she’d looked when he’d planted one last, soft kiss on her and rocked back onto his heels. There had been a spark of hunger there when she looked at him from hooded, contented eyes. That spark had flared brightly when he cleaned his fingers with his mouth, never taking his eyes from hers. He’d crawled up her body, planting wet, open-mouth kisses to her skin every couple of inches, intending for no part of her to go neglected. When he’d arrived at her sternum and looked up at her, he saw that the spark had grown into a wildfire. He’d forgone the rest of the journey he’d intended for his lips and seized her mouth with his, draping his body over hers and propping himself on his elbows.
When her need for air had required it, the Doctor had moved his mouth from hers down to her chin, lower to her jaw, tracing a path to her ear and seeking to touch the pulse behind it with his lips. “Please, Rose? May I?” he’d asked when he nudged her entrance. “I want to make love to you so badly.”
“Thought you already were,” she’d said, and her breathy voice had sounded like a smile.
“Cheeky.” He’d rotated his hips, rubbing himself against her clit and eliciting a gasp that dissolved into a tiny moan.
“If you’ve the brainpower to give me cheek, I’m not doin’ somethin’ right,” he’d growled around her earlobe.
She’d purred when his mouth closed around her nipple and he’d felt her clutch his back, scrabbling against his shoulder blades, trying with desperation to grip him.
“I thought you - oh...” She’d interrupted herself with a little cry of pleasure before she went on, “I thought you liked it when I got cheeky.”
He’d grinned at that, closing his teeth gently on her raised nipple then kissing it deeply when she cried out. He’d released her nipple with a pop, earning a groan from Rose, then moved across her chest to her other, neglected breast.
“That’s true,” he’d said. “Love it when you get cheeky, me. But not just now…” He suckled for a moment, then matched his actions from the other breast: a nip and another suck. “Right now, Rose Tyler, I’m going to take you.” He had growled, and walked his lips back up towards hers. “I’m going to claim you. I’m going to ruin you for any other man and chase away the memories of any pretty boy who came before.” He’d worried her clavicle with his teeth while he slid his hand from her shoulder, down her side and lower.
“I’m going to make you mine,” he’d repeated before he’d slipped a finger into her wet center again. “You’ll be mine, this,” he indicated what he was talking about with a thrust of his finger, “will be mine. And I’ll never let you go, Rose Tyler,” he’d promised. He’d pumped his finger in and out of her, enjoying the little sounds she made before he’d slipped a second finger in and brought his mouth back up to her neck.
“And when I do,” he’d rumbled between hot kisses there, “I want you mindless. Senseless. Unable to think of anything but me and how I’m making you feel.”
Rose had begun bucking her hips into his hand and he’d carefully added a third finger, bringing his thumb up to her clit to stroke her slowly. His mouth had claimed hers again and he’d kissed her deeply, keeping her mouth on his until she pulled away, gasping for air and whispering, ‘fuck’.
“I want you unable to form a coherent thought, and not able to say anything at all beyond calling my name, begging for me, and cries to the deity of your choice.”
“What are you - hnngh - what are you waiting for?” she’d ground out.
“You,” he’d said simply. “I want to make love to you, Rose, but I want you to hear you tell me that you want me to - just once more. One more time for my own peace of mind. I need to know you’re certain, that you want this. When I do…” He’d ground himself against her thigh, letting her feel his hard length. “I’m going to drive you mad.”
“Already...there…” She’d panted, grinding against his hand.
He’d kept up the stroking of his fingers, keeping the pace slow and steady, not wanting her to go over just yet. She’d writhed beneath him until she seemed to make the connection and give him what he was asking for.
“Please, Doctor, please. Oh, fuck, please.”
“Please what?” he’d asked innocently, but he’d pulled his fingers out and positioned himself.
“Please take me. Please make me yours.” The Doctor had nudged himself into her just a little bit, teasingly, at these words.
“Please,” she’d cried. “Please. I love you.”
Those words had been the catalyst he’d needed. He’d pressed himself into her slowly, going as far as he could until he could bury himself no deeper. He’d waited for a minute while she adjusted, then slid himself nearly all the way out before thrusting back in. She’d given a little cry of pleasure, a wordless sound that shot straight through him.
“Say it again.”
“Please,” she’d whined.
“Not that,” he’d said as he slid easily in and out of her. “The last thing you said. Tell me again. Please, Rose.”
“I love you, Doctor,” she’d sobbed, clutching at his shoulders and rolling her hips to meet him. “I love you so much…”
They were the magic words, and he sped up with a groan.
She’d kept up her babble; inarticulate cries of his name mixed with declarations of her love and devotion, entreaties to God, and utter filth. Each time she cried that she loved him, the Doctor’s tenuous grip on control had slackened and he’d driven into her harder, faster. All of his good intentions about making slow, sweet love to her their first time had flown right out of the window and into the night. He’d thrust into her greedily, his rhythm building while he’d battled with his own will. He was powerless to slow down, he knew, and the impulse to press his fingers to her temple and create the connection he desperately craved was nearly overpowering, but he’d fought to master his own body. Eventually, he’d thought.
Rose had bucked and begged beneath him, clutching at his shoulders and biceps while she called his name, pleading interspersed with beautiful filth. He’d stopped her mouth with a kiss, leaving her unable to do anything but make little impact noises while he’d driven himself into her narrow, wet heat. The Doctor had been surprised when she’d come suddenly, clenching around him and clawing his back as she screamed her release. There were angry furrows on his back now from her fingernails, and he’d wondered if she’d intended to mark him. The thought of her claiming him had left him dizzy. His hips had increased their rhythm and urgency of their own volition.
“I love you, Doctor, I love you, I love you,” she’d sobbed through her climax, and this had cracked the last bit of control he’d had, making him even more desperate for her.
Mine, he’d thought, and it was the only thought he’d been capable of. Mine. Rose. Love. Rose!
“Mine,” he’d grunted out loud as he frantically sought relief from the coiling tension low in his back. “My Rose. I love you. My Rose.”
“Yours,” she’d agreed, then thrown her head back and reached down to clutch his bum. “All yours. Only yours. Always yours.” She’d bit her lip to tamp down a wail. “And you’re mine, Doctor. All mine.”
He’d flown over the cliff at that, her claim of possession sending him into rapturous climax he hadn’t known was possible without a telepathic connection. He’d rasped her name over and over when he’d come: prayer, plea and praise all wrapped into one fervent syllable, and she’d answered him: “I’m here. I’m yours.”
The Doctor had known somehow, through the haze of bliss, that her smile against his neck when he shuddered his release was the real experience he’d been chasing for over nine hundred years.
~*~O~*~
Rose stirred now, wriggling her bum against him. The Doctor slid his own hips backwards a bit to keep her from feeling the erection that had come about while he’d been reliving their first time. It would have been easy for him to let her feel what she did to him, to kiss her awake and make love to her again. She wouldn’t mind, he was sure, but they’d made love twice more before she’d finally fallen asleep; he knew she was exhausted and probably just a bit sore.
He couldn’t help the little, self-satisfied smile that thought gave him.
Oh Rose, his Rose, savior of his universe. He was holding the greatest treasure in the whole of reality as she slept, and well he knew it. She was precious, priceless, and all his. She’d demanded him in return but that point was moot. He’d been hers for months, probably since he first lay eyes on her in that cluttered basement.
He kissed the top of her head and let himself drift towards sleep while he breathed in her scent: jasmine and cherry blossoms from the beauty treatments she’d been given before the feast, the slight sheen of sweat they’d both earned, pheromones so strong they nearly overwhelmed him, and, best of all, his own scent. All of it tinged with the faint but unmistakable aroma of eternity.
The Doctor thought, as sleep claimed him, that he’d never smelled anything so good in any of his lives.
~*~O~*~
There was a loud knock at the door, and the Doctor snapped awake. Rose stirred and made a little moue in her sleep, and he kissed her forehead before shifting her off him onto her side. “Sleep, love,” he whispered. She gave a little sigh, a contented sound, and he smiled.
The knocking came again, and this time it sounded like the door was being hit with a balled fist. “Rose!”
The Doctor tugged on his trousers hurriedly, grabbing his jumper as he went to the door with quick strides. He swung the door open, still barechested, and hissed at Jack to be quiet.
Jack’s eyes widened for just a moment, then his face relaxed into a smirk. “What are you doing here? Isn’t this Rose’s room?”
The Doctor threw his jumper over his head, decidedly ignoring Jack’s randy gaze. “We were sleeping until you so rudely banged on the door like a bloody lunatic.”
“Sleeping? Is that what it's called?”
He tugged his jumper down to cover his bare chest. “Yes, Jack, sleeping.”
“Together? Naked?” Jack asked, his eyebrow raising and lip quirking. The Doctor gave him an Oncoming Storm-worthy glare and Jack chuckled. “Must have worn yourselves out. Not surprising.”
The Doctor shushed Jack but otherwise didn’t answer. He pushed the other man backwards, out of the doorway and into the grass in front of the guest quarters before he continued. The sun was just beginning to peek over the brilliantly pink and orange horizon, and the early morning sky was dotted with bright stars. The stream that ran beside their guest cottage babbled happily. Once the Doctor slid the door shut behind him, he asked in a low voice, “what are you doing here?”
“Apparently less than you are.” Jack crossed his arms and gave him a smug look, then his eyes twinkled with mischief. “Did you show her what a cunning linguist you are?”
“Jack,” the Doctor growled.
“Well? Did you?” the American asked, and the Doctor was fairly sure he would be bouncing in a moment. “You did, didn’t you? You dog!” Jack punched him on the shoulder in celebration.
“That’s none of your bloody business, Harkness, and keep your voice down,” the Doctor snapped. Then more quietly, “You’ll wake Rose.”
Jack actually let out a little giggle at this, and the Doctor told him to shut up. “Can’t help it, Doc,” he said. “Never thought you two would get your shit together. I figured one or both of you would chicken out at the last minute again. ‘Bout damn time.”
“Are you done gloatin’ yet?” the Doctor snapped.
“Who, me? Not remotely. I’ll be going on about this for months,” Jack promised with a toothy grin. The Doctor scowled at him and Jack’s put out a hand to knock the Doctor’s shoulder. “Seriously, Doc, I’m happy for you.”
The Doctor was rather happy for himself, actually, and sensed the younger man was being genuine - if more than a bit gauche. He decided to let Jack have his fun so long as he didn’t embarrass or hurt Rose. Or get too obnoxious.
“What’d you want with Rose?” he said, being a little short with Jack just so the other man wouldn’t have so much to pat himself on the back for.
“Was looking for you, actually,” Jack said, his voice taking on a more serious edge. “Should have known to look here.” The Doctor rolled his eyes. “I spent the evening in the company of a young woman who happens to be the daughter of Yamana Sozen. What do you know about the Ōnin War?”
“Started in 1467 over a claim to the Shogunate. Lasted a decade. Decimated Kyoto.”
“What year is it now?” Jack asked carefully, and the Doctor’s stomach dropped. Jack knew the answer. Somehow he’d managed to bring them to the wrong time.
“We were meant to land in 1462,” he nearly mumbled.
“It’s 1467, Doc. May. And Yamana’s daughter warned me that we need to flee Kyoto. She said that her father is loyal to Ashikaga Yoshimi and denounces Yoshimasa’s claim that his infant son should take the Shogunate. The army will be marching in soon.”
The Doctor swore bitterly. “This is a fixed point in Japanese history, you know. We can’t interfere.”
Jack nodded. “I know. Kenshi said that she and her mother would be alerted of the Army’s arrival in time to flee Kyoto safely, that they were to stay here to avoid arousing suspicion until they were called away. She warned me so that we could get away before we were trapped and hurt. She rather took a shine to Rose.”
The Doctor smiled a little at that. Once again, Rose’s easy popularity with the people she met was saving the day. His remarkable Rose. “Everyone Rose meets ‘takes a shine’ to her, as you say.”
Jack nodded with a little smile of his own, then asked the Doctor what his plan was.
The Doctor heaved a sigh and scrubbed his face with his hands. He’d really hoped for a couple of days with Rose, just a couple of peaceful, romantic days. It was just his bloody rotten luck to land on the cusp of a decade-long civil war. He shot a dirty mental look at the TARDIS.
“It’s dawn now. We’ll make our excuses and leave at noon.” Jack nodded and the Doctor went on. “Keep an eye on your Kenshi. If she disappears on you, head to the TARDIS immediately and we’ll meet you there to leave.”
“Gotcha,” Jack nodded.
“In the meantime, go enjoy yourself.”
“We could leave now, you know. Might be more prudent.” Jack’s voice held a hint of amusement.
“Could do,” the Doctor agreed. “But I’m not quite ready to go. And since when do you give a rat’s arse about ‘prudent’?”
Jack chuckled, “Oh, I just bet you’re not ready to go.”
The Doctor scowled again and tried to ignore the reddening he felt on his cheeks and ears. “Shut it, Harkness.”
The other man just laughed and clapped the Doctor on the shoulder again. “Go back to bed, Doc. I’ll see you at noon.”
~*~O~*~
It occurred to Rose first, as she swam up from the murky confusion of sleep, that she heard birds singing. That confused her. The TARDIS gave her a visual display in her windows each morning, but never an auditory accompaniment.
A cool breeze wafted into the room, kissing her bare skin and causing her to shiver.
Well now, that was downright unusual.
Rose opened one eye and raised her head a little to look out on the room she was in. Mounds of stiff fabric stood on the terrace, marking the final resting place of her dress from the evening before. The memory of how that dress came to be in a pile while she lay in bed naked washed over her and-
The bed sank behind her, and Rose spun her head. The Doctor was tugging off his jumper, tossing it aside carelessly. He gave her a seductive grin as he slid in the bed behind her and put one arm around her waist, bringing his nose into her neck. She bit her lip against the sensation when he inhaled deeply.
“Mmm...I was hoping to get back to you before you woke up. Had plans, me,” he said in a low, dark voice.
Rose closed her eyes with a smile and counted to three with as much brainpower as she could command. “Yeah?”
“Mmmhmm,” he purred against her shoulder. “I can touch you now. See?” He lay one hand on her thigh and let it slide up her side lightly. “We got rid of that boundary. And I find, Rose Tyler,” he growled, nipping at her neck, “that now that I'm allowed to touch you, that's all I want to do.”
His hand skated over the dip in her waist and she shivered again.
Chapter 4: Bad Wolf
Summary:
The Doctor, Rose and Jack visit the Gamestation and face the Daleks.
Notes:
We deviate from canon in this chapter. So I suppose we're AU from here on out..?
Thank you for reading!
Chapter Text
Jack waltzed into the control room just after noon, nodded greetings, and, with a smirk, sauntered into the corridor to his room. He dropped his bag off in his room, tossing it unceremoniously onto his bed, then turned and went back to where his friends were with a little spring in his step. His eyes flitted back and forth between the Time Lord and Rose, noting the intangible change between the two of them. There was tension in the air, but it wasn’t strain at all. It was… anticipation. Suspense. It was the mostly-happy and slightly-awkward newness between two people who had changed the status of their relationship very recently.
As happy as the two of them undoubtedly were, Jack was certain that he was at least nearly as happy for them. The sexual and romantic tension on this ship had almost driven him nuts.
“So…” Jack said, smirking and sauntering towards where Rose was settling herself on the jump seat.
She blushed and bit her lip endearingly, darting her eyes towards the Doctor. She’d just come back into the console room after changing from her period Japanese clothes and was now wearing her much more comfortable jeans-and-hoodie combo that was nearly a uniform by now.
The Doctor narrowed his eyes at him from behind the console, a silent and unheeded warning, then went back to work.
“What?” Rose asked, feigning innocence.
“I need to know all the details,” Jack said, perching himself beside her. “All of them. Especially the juicy ones.”
“Leave off, Harkness,” the Doctor called out without looking up.
Jack lowered his voice to a near-whisper and otherwise ignored the Time Lord. “There are sayings about big hands, big ears and big noses indicating a big…” He made a lewd gesture and Rose giggled.
“I can hear you, Jack,” the Doctor grumbled.
Rose giggled again, darted her eyes over to where the big-handed man in question stood with also-big, slightly-pink ears, then whispered conspiratorially, “It was wonderful. He’s amazin’.”
The Doctor, of course, didn’t respond to this. He made a show of ignoring the two of them, and the only indication that he’d heard was the darkening hue of his ears.
Jack let out a big laugh, picking her up and spinning her around in a circle. The Doctor peeked his head out from behind the controls and let the corner of his lip quirk up at the sight of them.
“Oh, my Rosie, atta girl!” Jack crowed.
Rose was beaming, but her face fell suddenly, confusion mixed with a little fear. Jack stood her on her feet.
“Rose? You alright?”
“Oh!” She reached out to steady herself on Jack’s forearms.
“Rosie?” Jack said, worried. “What’s happening?”
The Doctor was beside her in an instant and she looked at him with frightened eyes. “It feels like somethin’s pullin’...” Her sentence ended on a yelp as she was dragged towards the TARDIS wall by an invisible force.
“Rose!” The Doctor grabbed for her hand and so did Jack, but both missed. She slid closer and closer to the wall, reaching out for them. “Hold on, Rose!” the Doctor yelled.
But she was gone, and Jack made a startled sound when he felt the same tugging sensation in his abdomen she had described.
“Uh, Doctor?”
Jack saw the Doctor turn wide eyes his way for just a second before he gave a panicked yell, was dragged backwards forcefully, and knew no more.
~*~O~*~
Have a great life. Will you do that for me, Rose? Have a fantastic life.
Angry tears pricked the backs of Rose’s eyes. He’d tricked her. He’d lied to her. They were supposed to spend forever together, dammit! He’d rescued her from the middle of the Dalek fleet, and she’d been sure everything was going to be okay. He always made everything okay.
Now he’d sent her away. He’d tricked her and sent her away.
Anguished fury ricocheted within Rose’s every cell, and she screamed.
“NO!” She pounded on the doors, shouting at the Doctor, willing him to hear her. “You can’t make me leave you! You can’t do this to me! You said you loved me, you prat! Let me out! Let me out!”
The doors to the TARDIS did not respond to her pleas, and it occurred to her that she would need to actually control the ship if she were to get back to the Doctor. There must be some way to reverse course.
She ran to the console and looked around at the bewildering array of levers, knobs and buttons for only a second before she started slamming all of them. “Take me back!” she yelled, her voice rapidly becoming a shriek. “Take me back! Now!”
The TARDIS groaned and wheezed, then settled herself more gently than usual, as if deferring to Rose's already shaky emotional state.
Rose staggered out of the TARDIS doors, despair flooding through her when she realized she was back in London and not with the Doctor, where she should be. She leaned back against the TARDIS, her knees bent and eyes cast upwards, desperate to make some kind of connection with the Doctor. The clouds prevented her from seeing into the sky above, but she figured that it wouldn’t have mattered. He was so far into the future, she wouldn’t have been able to see him anyway.
Tears stung her eyes and she sunk to the ground on a sob, curled around herself and wept for the man she loved, currently dying, thousands and thousands of years in the future.
~*~O~*~
“Rose!” Jackie called out when she and Mickey rounded the corner, spotting her.
Something was wrong, Jackie knew. Terribly wrong. The Doctor was nowhere to be seen and, while Jackie would have ordinarily considered that to be a good thing, Rose was on the ground sobbing. And that was definitely not good.
“Rose!” Jackie yelled again when she ran forward and knelt beside her daughter.
“He’s dying, Mum.” Rose didn’t look up, just cried into her knees. “He’s dying right now.”
“Who’s dying?”
“The Doctor!” Rose cried. “We were in this place and the Daleks were coming...they’d already kidnapped me once but the Doctor got me back safe...but they were going to kill us all, all of us... he was making the Delta Wave to get rid of them once and for all, but he sent me away…” She stopped, her weeping making her nearly unintelligible. “He sent me away, Mum! He’s dying and I’m not there!”
“Rose, oh Rose, my sweet baby.” Jackie’s heart ached to see her daughter in such pain and she dragged Rose into her arms. Rose clung to her and wept. Jackie looked up at Mickey whose face was concerned but otherwise inscrutable.
“He sent me away, Mum! He made me leave!” Rose wailed into her mother’s chest. In a ragged, broken voice she cried, “He tricked me, Mum. I would never have left him, but he tricked me.”
“He sent you back to me, Rose. He wanted to keep you safe. God knows I have hated that man, but right now, I love him and do you know why? Because he did the right thing. He sent you back to me.” The warmth that bloomed in Jackie’s chest was unbidden and unexpected. The Doctor had put Rose above himself. Jackie had been right all along - he did love Rose. She didn’t know quite how she felt about that.
“I don’t want to be safe if I’m not with him!”
“Shhh, now…” Jackie soothed. She kissed the top of Rose’s head and rocked her as best she could sitting on a street corner and against the TARDIS. “Shhh, sweetheart. It’ll be okay.”
Rose accepted the comfort for a few moments before she sat back from her mother, wiped her eyes and stood. The grief was gone, leaving only Rose’s puffy, red eyes as evidence she’d cried at all. There was no more crying now. Only Rose, pacing restlessly with a determined set of her jaw. “I have to go back, Mum.”
“He doesn’t want you there, Rose. You could die.”
“I don’t care. I don’t care what he wants. I’m going back.” Rose wiped her eyes, clearing them of residual tears and spun around to glare at Jackie. “He and I can defeat anything. Together. I know we can. I’m going back.”
“C’mon, now. How about a cuppa? I could murder a cuppa, I could.” Jackie slapped both hands on her velour-covered knees and stood, false cheer radiating from her. She attempted to coax her daughter with a light tug to the elbow.
Rose shook off her mother’s helping hand and Jackie could see barely-restrained anger bubbling to surface. “Is that your solution to everything? A cup of tea? Two hundred thousand years in the future, he’s dying. He’s alone and he’s dying, fighting to save all of us! And you think a cuppa will make it all better! ”
“Don’t be daft, Rose. B’sides, all that is happening years in the future. That’s a long way off.”
“You don’t understand! That’s now! He needs help, now. He needs me. I’ve gotta get back to him, Mum.” Rose reached for the TARDIS door.
“Don’t. Please don’t go back there, sweetheart.” Jackie stopped Rose’s hand with a gentle touch. “He wanted you safe. If he sent you away, he must have had his reasons, yeah?”
Rose tilted her chin up, refusing to meet Jackie’s eyes. “I don’t care.”
“Alright then, Little Miss Clever,” Jackie said, hoping her annoyance would disguise the fear in her voice. “How are you gonna get back? Eh? Can you even fly the TARDIS?”
“No. But I’ll figure something out. I’m not gonna just give up and walk away.” Rose pushed open the TARDIS door and stepped inside.
Jackie followed her. “Rose, listen to me!”
“No!” Rose spun on her heel and faced her mother, fire glinting in her eyes. Jackie took half a step backwards in surprise before setting her jaw and putting her hands on her hips. Rose didn’t miss a beat. “Dad wouldn’t give up. He’d believe in me... and the Doctor. He’d tell me to keep tryin’. And that’s what I’m goin’ to do: I’m not givin’ up, either!” She turned away and began to pace around the TARDIS console, peering at the switches and buttons, trying to figure out what the Doctor would do.
Jackie started to speak but her voice wavered. She tried again. “What if you die, sweetheart?”
Rose shook her head and waved her hand, dismissing the the notion. “I won’t, Mum. I know I won’t. I can just feel it. Does that make sense? Probably not, but I just know that… that this isn’t it for me.” She came to a stop and turned to face her mother, crossing her arms.
There was a moment of stillness between the two women. Jackie broke the silence: “You’re determined to do this, aren’t you.” It wasn’t a question.
“Yes.” Rose lifted her chin, lips pressed together..
Jackie looked at her daughter, and while there was grief, anger and loss there, there was also acceptance. “Okay.”
Rose eyed her skeptically, “You’re not gonna try to stop me?”
Jackie shook her head. “I’ve no idea what I’m thinking, but you’re right. Something’s telling me this is not the end. You’re in love with that daft alien, yeah?”
“So much, Mum,” Rose said on a watery breath.
“So, how do you plan on getting back then?”
“Well,” Rose peered under the console, “this ship, she’s alive, yeah? She’s telepathic. I just need to talk to her, convince her to make a return trip. I just need to get her to listen to me.”
“What, is she listening, now? You’re just going to talk to her?”
“No, not like this!” Rose exclaimed as the pieces of her plan seemed to coalesce. “I gotta get inside. Gotta open this panel, here.” She pointed to the panels under the console. “That’s the heart of the TARDIS, in there. If we open it, I can make contact. Tell her what to do.” Her eyes flitted to her mother’s, beseeching her to understand.
“I’ll help you,” Mickey spoke up, startling Rose.
Jackie knew that Rose had always been hyperaware of her surroundings; growing up on the estate had not allowed her to zone out and ignore things that were going on around her, and Jackie’s own teachings to her young daughter had encouraged Rose to remain vigilant of whatever environment she found herself in. Yet here, in this moment, she’d forgotten Mickey was even present. The fact gave Jackie greater insight into the grief and loss that Rose was experiencing. She sighed. “I’ll help you, too –“
“Oh, Mum!”
“- on one condition…”
“What’s that?”
“You make him bring you back more often. Come home and let me see you every now and again. If I’m sending you back to him, that’s the least the two of you can do for me.”
Rose launched herself into Jackie’s arms and held her tight. “I promise, Mum. I swear.”
Jackie felt Mickey’s arms wrap around both of them awkwardly for a second, then the three of them broke away.
Mickey put his hand on Rose’s face and he peered at her intently. “Babe, I’m doin’ this for you. That wanker could sod off for all I care, and I’ve hoped he would a million times because I love you. But I don’t want him to die, and more than anythin’ I want you happy. So I’m going to help you get back to him, even if it kills me. You remember that, hear? I want you happy, no matter what.”
Tears spilled down Rose’s cheeks and Jackie felt a couple slide down her own cheeks. Mickey’s sacrifice was enough to solidify her own resolve. She was going to send her daughter into an incredibly dangerous situation. She’d never been a religious woman, but she prayed right then that her Rose would come home safe. Even still, she couldn’t help thinking that Pete would be proud of her giving their daughter over to this kind of love.
~*~O~*~
There was a loud groan of wrenching metal and Rose heard the TARDIS’ door slam. Then she felt a warm light on her face and turned towards the console.
Swirling, brilliant light surrounded Rose and she heard singing. It’s beautiful, Rose had time to think before she was engulfed.
Rose Tyler, she heard a smooth, feminine voice sing inside her head. I see your heart. I see your desire. It pleases me.
“All I want is the Doctor,” Rose said.
You love my thief and he loves you.
“I love the Doctor.”
Yes.
“Your thief is the Doctor?”
Yes.
“Please take me to him.”
I owe you a great debt, Rose Tyler. You saved my thief. You healed him. Made him whole again.
“All I want is him. Healthy. Happy. Not alone. Only him. Forever.”
Yes, the Vortex sang. I see that.
“Please take me to him,” Rose repeated.
I see your desires and share them. My thief desires you. He needs you. I have the power to give you both what you want. You can become the Bad Wolf, and I can set the timeline in motion. Or I can take you home, and the current timeline can continue.
“Please, not home. Don’t take me home.”
Very well, but if you do this, you must understand the life you are choosing, the timeline you’re setting yourself upon. It is all your choice...
~*~O~*~
Minutes later, the Doctor stumbled backwards when the doors to the TARDIS opened and the Bad Wolf stepped out.
~*~O~*~
Rose woke in the medbay of the TARDIS and blinked, confused. “Doctor?”
“Rose!” he called out, running to her side and taking her hand. “You’re alright! Oh...oh gods... you’re okay.” He ran his hands over her arms, her face, feverishly touching her in various places as if to test her corporeality, then crushed her into a hug.
“M’alright, Doctor. M’alright,” she murmured, as much to reassure herself as him.
“You shouldn’t be!” he snapped, his mood shifting in an instant. He pushed Rose back and held her by the shoulders, peered at her with blazing eyes. “What the bloody, sodden hell were you thinking?”
Rose was startled and blinked up at him once before her eyes narrowed accusingly. “You were dying, you prat! What else was I supposed to do!?”
“You were supposed to do as you were told and let me!” he bellowed.
Rose laughed and crossed her arms. “Yeah, as if I were going to do that.”
“Of all the stupid…”
“Oi!” she snapped, knocking his hands away, where he’d reached to embrace her again. “Mind who you’re callin’ stupid, Time Lord. And what the ruddy hell were you thinking, sending me away?”
“You were about to die, Rose!” He paced in front of her like a wounded lion. “There wasn't just a chance. It was more than a probability; it was certain!”
“But I didn’t! I saved all our lives!” She yelled, then she snorted and her voice turned sardonic. “You can’t be happy about that, though, no….”
“You can’t have expected me to keep you there when I could keep you safe! At home!” he roared.
“This is my home!" she yelled with equal fury. "Wasn’t your choice to make, was it?” she demanded. “It’s my life! I own it!”
The Doctor crossed his arms and sneered. “Is that right? Your life, huh? And your life matters so little, it’s so insignificant, that you could just throw it away to come back for me?”
“Yeah, that’s it! That’s exactly it!” Rose shouted, her eyes flashing.
He turned away from her, pacing again, running his hands over his close-cut hair in frustration and snarling to himself. She huffed, ignoring his bluster. She was too tired to argue with him just now, but apparently, he was done arguing as well, because he whirled suddenly and tugged her into his arms, holding her so close she could feel the beat of his hearts against her own chest, through his jumper. “I love you,” he proclaimed into her hair. “I love you so bloody damn much, Rose.”
She smiled against his chest, hearing the words that she knew would be the closest she would come to an getting an apology or forgiveness. Putting her arms around his waist, herself, she adjusted her face a little so that she could breathe and speak more easily.
“I love you, too, Doctor.”
He didn’t answer, just held her tight. After a moment, he pulled back and lay his palm against her face, his blue eyes piercing into hers. She tilted her head, resting her cheek in the cool, slightly rough comfort of his palm. He smiled down at her, then bent to give her a soft, chaste kiss.
“Thanks for that,” she smiled at him when he pulled away. He smiled back, and his eyes twinkled a little. “How did I get here?” she asked.
“You took the vortex inside of you, Rose. You came back to save us. Oh, that was so bloody stupid, love, I’m tempted to lock you away for your own good. But you were fantastic!”
Rose refrained from rolling her eyes at him, choosing instead to ignore the argument-bait. “I don’t understand,” she started, and tried to focus on what had happened rather than the aftermath. Her memories on the matter were blurred and maddeningly just out of reach. “I don’t remember…”
“You looked into the Heart of the TARDIS and came back to me. You became the Bad Wolf...all this time we’ve been hearing those words, Rose, following us around everywhere? It was you. You were leavin’ yourself messages so you could get back to save us. You were a - a goddess of Time, Rose. You destroyed all of the Daleks: turned them to atoms and shot them out across the universe. And you brought Jack back to life.”
Rose’s mind reeled. Goddess? Her? She tried again to recall what had happened for herself, but she couldn’t remember anything past the door to the TARDIS closing, shutting out the Estate. All that would come to mind was a soft singing and a golden warmth: nothing else would coalesce in her memory, so she latched on to the Doctor’s words. His last statement startled her enough to bring her out of her reverie. “Jack died?”
“He did, but you saved him.”
“Is he alright?”
The Doctor nodded fervently. “He is. I’ll run some tests on him - and you too - but everything’s alright, Rose. We lived!” He pulled her into his arms again. “Oh, Rose. I was so scared…Please, please don’t ever do that again. You could have died, Rose.” He deflated onto her shoulder. “I could have lost you.”
She nuzzled into his neck and closed her eyes. She took a deep breath and inhaled his comforting scent, her fingers feeling the soft, short hairs on the back of his head, basking in the fact that they were together again. “M’alright, Doctor.”
“You’re alright,” he agreed, his voice muffled in her hair. He spoke almost as if he were confessing his greatest weakness, and Rose wondered if perhaps he was. “I needed you safe - need you safe. Always.”
She pulled away from him. “But what about you?” she said, her eyes welling with tears. “You sent me away, leaving yourself to die.”
“Aye, I did. And I would do it again if I thought it meant you were going to be okay and live a happy life.”
“But how could I ever have been happy?” she persisted, raising her head so he could see her tears welling up. “You can’t honestly think that I would ever be alright again if anything happened to you!”
The Doctor didn’t say anything to that. He just looked at her, his wide blue eyes searching her damp, caramel brown ones. “Rose, I -”
“Don’t ever do it again.” Her voice broke on a sob and she buried her face in her hands for a minute, crying. “Please don’t send me away again. No matter what. It’s no life if it’s not with you.”
“Oh, Rose,” He gathered her close again. “I couldn’t live with myself if something happened to you.”
“I couldn’t stand it, either,” she blubbered. “I thought you were gone forever. It was the worst four hours of my life.” He rubbed her back and rocked her back and forth. “Promise me, Doctor. Promise me you won’t make me leave.”
The Doctor closed his eyes tight. “I never want you away from me,” he said.
“That’s not the same thing.”
“I know, but I can’t promise… I have to know that you’re safe, Rose.”
She cried into his chest, wrapping her arms around him and clinging to the leather. “I love you, Doctor.”
“I love you, too,” he murmured into her hair.
“Rose? Rose!” Jack came to the door of the infirmary and hesitated for just a second to take in the scene, then barreled into the room, reaching for Rose. The Doctor stepped back, smiling a little, giving Jack the space he needed to hug Rose.
“Oh, Rosie, I thought I was never going to see you again.”
Rose cried into his shoulder, the tears she’d been holding back with the Doctor finally breaking free. “You died, Jack.”
“You brought me back. I’m alright because of you. You saved me.”
“Bad Wolf saved you. I think…?” She looked to the Doctor for confirmation. His face was much more serious now.
“What happened? What do you remember?”
“I was back at the Estate,” she said slowly. “Mickey and Mum came when they heard the TARDIS, and I told them I had to get back to you. They helped me.” The Doctor blinked at this, but Rose went on. “Mum got a tow truck and we put a chain on the console to make it open.”
“Your mum?” the Doctor asked, with a cocked brow.
Jack looked puzzled. “Where’d your mum get a tow truck?”
“Oh, I could hazard a guess…”
The Doctor’s eyes were twinkling when he spoke and although Rose was relieved to see it, she smacked him. “Oi!”
“Ow!” he said, rubbing his offended shoulder. “What’d you do that for?”
“S’my mum you’re talking about!”
He scowled for just a moment, but there was no heat to it. Rose went on.
“When it popped open there was this light all around me. Kind of like the light that shone on Margaret, but it was different. It was...swirly, yeah? And singing - the most beautiful singing I’ve ever heard.”
The Doctor listened to her attentively, then shook his head. “I still can’t believe it! The Vortex,” he said, awestruck. “You actually looked into the Vortex, Rose. No one is ever meant to do that, not ever. Time Lords are only meant to look at the Vortex once, and it drives many of them mad! It’s too strong, too powerful... especially not humans.” He paused for a moment, then went on in a whisper. “But not you. Not you, precious girl.”
Rose blushed under the weight of his awestruck gaze and the soft touch of his hand on her cheek.
Jack broke into the moment. “Do you remember anything else?”
“All I remember was being desperate to get back to you, to make sure you were safe and alive. Mum brought the tow truck and we hooked it up, Mickey stepped on the gas and the next thing I remember is waking up a few minutes ago.”
The Doctor scooped her up again, holding her close to him. “You were amazin’. The Dalek emperor sassed you, so you pointed your finger at him and separated his atoms. Fantastic!” He grinned with pride, but quickly sobered again. “You were burning, Rose. No one was ever meant to have that power. I begged you to let it go and for once, you listened. You just turned around and released the Vortex back into the TARDIS. You saved yourself. You created yourself, saved us, then saved yourself.”
“I did?”
“You did.”
“Am I going to be alright?” She worried her lower lip between her teeth. “Is Jack?”
“I’m alright, Rosie,” Jack said. “I wouldn’t be if it wasn’t for you, but I’m alright. But what about you? You okay?”
She nodded. “I feel fine. Just knackered! Like I could sleep for days.”
“So, everything’s back to normal then?”
“Oi!”
“Right, let’s get you to bed then.” The Doctor held out a hand to her and she slid off the gurney to her feet. She wobbled a bit and he steadied her with an arm around her waist. "I’ll run some tests on both of you in the morning.”
Jack leaned over and kissed her forehead. “Go sleep, Rosie.”
“I’m glad you’re alright, Jack.”
He smiled and hugged her, but the Doctor didn’t release his protective arm this time. “Thank you.”
“Thank Bad Wolf,” Rose said.
Jack smiled and shot the Doctor a look that Rose couldn’t quite read before he left the room.
“C’mon, Rose. Let’s go to bed.” His arm around her waist tugged a bit, and they started out into the hall.
“Doctor?”
“Yes, love?”
“I promised my mother we’d visit more if she’d help me.” She grimaced in anticipation of his repsonse.
The Doctor chuckled and stopped in the middle of the corridor, tugging her to him again. “Don’t worry, Rose. Anything you want, love. We’ll go tomorrow if you’d like. I’m just grateful that she helped you come back to me...I’d do anything. ...But not leave you behind. Never that.”
She laid her head against his chest. “Will you…” She stuttered, hesitant. “Will you stay with me tonight?”
He smiled down at her, his soft, genuine smile. “I don’t think anything could keep me away from you, frankly. I was so very frightened, Rose. But you became a goddess.” She flushed and he bent his head to press his lips to hers. He kept the kiss chaste, but she could feel his lips trembling like the rest of him. “My goddess,” he whispered against her lips. “I love you.”
“I love you, too,” she said.
The Doctor brought up his hand and pushed a tendril of hair behind her ear, tracing his fingers along her cheek. She leaned into his touch.
“You’re exhausted,” he said quietly. “Let’s put you to bed.”
The Doctor took her to her room and helped her out of her hoodie while she toed off her shoes and tugged off her jeans. He went to her drawer and pulled out a pair of pajama pants, handing them to her. She put them on and crawled onto the bed as he removed his jacket, jumper, and jeans.
She hummed when he slid between the covers behind her, pressing his body flush to hers and wrapping his arm around her waist. He kissed her shoulder and she sighed, a small, pleased sound.
“Doctor?”
“Hmm?” he said, nestling behind her so that his forehead was lying against her back.
“I want to make love tonight, but…”
“Not tonight, love.”
Her shoulders slumped a bit and her voice was small. “You don’t want to?”
“Oh, I do, Rose. I do.” He kissed her shoulder then adjusted his arm around her to tug her a bit closer. “I always want to. But you need to rest and recuperate, and all I need right now is to hold you, to know that you’re okay. Tomorrow I’ll take you to see Jackie and thank her personally. We’ll stay as long as you like, and I’ll stay put, too. Happily.” He blew out a shuddery breath. “I may never let you out of my sight again.”
“Good,” Rose murmured. She nuzzled against him a little more snugly and drifted to sleep, safe within the Doctor’s embrace.
Chapter 5: Christmas with Jackie
Summary:
After the events at the Gamestation, Rose, the Doctor and Jack head back to Jackie's only to find it's Christmas.
Notes:
Oh wow, you guys. I didn't expect a big response to this fic. This is the most-subscribed DW fic I've ever published, and I'm honored beyond words. You guys are the absolute best in the entire world, and I appreciate every one of you. Your comments, subscriptions, bookmarks and kudos have helped me (mostly) sort through a crisis of confidence with this fic.
Speaking of being the best and appreciation, tenroseforeverandever is the best beta of all time. Thank you for helping me "spanx" my words, and get rid of unnecessary adverbs! :D
I hope that you all had the Merriest of Christmases last week, and will have the best New Year anyone ever did!!!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
“Mum!” Rose threw open the door of the flat and ran inside. “Mum! Where are you?”
Jackie stuck her head out of the kitchen. “Rose? Rose! You’re back!”
The two women wrapped each other in a fierce hug, each of them with tears running down their cheeks. “I thought I’d lost you forever,” Jackie cried.
“M’here, Mum. M’alright.”
The Doctor felt a deep pang of guilt as he closed the door behind himself and Jack, then led the younger man into Jackie’s lounge. Rose needed her mum and Jackie needed Rose. No matter how he felt about the older woman (and his feelings were decidedly warmer since she’d sent Rose back to him the day before), he figured he should probably follow through with what Rose had promised and get her back here more often. It wasn’t just good for Jackie to see her daughter, Rose benefited from the visits, as well.
The Doctor pondered the situation - it’d be easy to stay away for long periods of time, really. They could just time their landings and space them out every couple of weeks in Jackie’s timeline. They could avoid coming here for weeks, months, even years if they wanted. Jackie need be none the wiser.
As if she sensed what he was thinking, Jackie looked up from Rose. It wasn’t a pretty sight. Her mascara was running from red, puffy eyes, and she swiped her hand across her cheeks in an attempt to dry them. She leveled her gaze at the Doctor, who felt his insides tighten. “You,” she said.
The Doctor did his best not to take an involuntary step back, bracing himself for another slap.
Instead, Jackie threw herself into his arms. He stood there, looking at Rose with wide, disconcerted eyes, while her mother sobbed her thanks and relief into his chest. Rose just smiled at the two of them, wiping her own tears. Seeing that he would get no help from her, the Doctor patted Jackie on the back awkwardly.
“You brought her back to me,” the woman in his arms wailed. “Thank you...thank you. I don’t know what I’d have done…”
Seeing Rose’s relief at being reunited with her mother and the hopeful, happy look she was giving the two of them, he knew that he couldn’t just take Rose away and come back sporadically, allowing Jackie to think they’d only been gone a short while. It would be unfair to Jackie - not to mention how much it would hurt Rose. She loved her mum, and he, himself, was indebted to her a great deal.
With an inward sigh, he resolved to make more stops in London, early 21st century, and not just let Jackie believe they were doing so. It would please Rose. That’s all that mattered; Rose’s happiness was all he needed. Jackie Tyler had never been his favorite person. The two of them had never gotten along (current happy-crying notwithstanding), but she was Rose’s family. Rose loved Jackie and wanted her in her life. And for Rose, he would make a sacrifice and concerted effort.
Perhaps that would even begin to mend the rift between himself and Jackie. He knew that Rose would appreciate that.
“Who is this?” Jackie pulled back from the Doctor’s chest suddenly. The Doctor released her without hesitation, leaving his hands raised in the air as he stared at his own chest and the wet spot she had left behind, like he had no idea how it had gotten there or what to do about it. Jackie mopped her eyes and mascara-stained cheeks again and actually gave a coy, little smile at the tall, handsome man in her lounge. The one with a dry chest.
“Mum, this is Jack.” Rose laid her hand on his bicep as she presented him to her mum. “I told you about him, ‘member? He travels with us now.”
Jack put on his most charming smile. “Captain Jack Harkness, ma’am, pleased to meet you. And may I just say, I now understand fully how Rose turned out so beautiful.”
“Jack,” the Doctor warned, but Jackie preened.
“Oh, go on then,” she said, blushing when Jack raised her hand to her lips. She looked to Rose and lowered her voice to a stage whisper. “I like him!”
Rose was looking around the flat, spotting a tree in the corner. “Mum, is it Christmas? How long have I been gone?”
“Two months,” Jackie answered, her voice taking on a flinty tone. “Not a call, nothing!. I’ve nearly gone spare, I have, worrying about you.”
Rose looked a bit ashamed and the Doctor felt another pang. It certainly wasn’t Rose’s fault they were two months late. He sent a mental admonishment to the TARDIS, who didn’t dignify him with a response.
“M’sorry, Mum.”
Jackie sniffed and wiped her eyes one more time, her fingers black with makeup when she pulled them away. The Doctor cringed when she put one of those hands to Rose’s cheek. “No matter, love, you’re here now. And just in time for Christmas!” Realization hit her. “Oh, but I don’t have anything for himself or the Captain.”
Jack raised his hands, “Oh, Mrs. Tyler, you mustn’t worry about us...we’re certainly quite alright without any gifts.”
“Nonsense,” Jackie declared, crossing her arms. “It’s Christmas Eve, shops are still open.”
“Jackie, really -” the Doctor protested.
“Hush, now. I’m taking my daughter and we’re going Christmas shopping for the two of you. You’re all stayin’ for Christmas, and I won’t hear another word about it.”
Rose was biting her lip to try to hide a smile, looking at the Doctor and Jack.
Jack didn’t seem all that perturbed by the idea. His face was open and even… pleased. The Doctor looked from him, useless as he was, to take in Rose and Jackie’s hopeful looks.
He snorted to himself. Like he could ever deny Rose anything when she looked at him like that.
“Oh, alright. But don’t spend your money on me, Jackie.”
“S’my money, I’ll spend it how I want,” she said with a mulish expression and hint of humor.
The Doctor sighed in defeat.
“Rose? Are you ready to go? I just need to clean myself up a bit.”
Rose shook her head at her mother. “I’d like to sit down and at least have a cuppa, if we can. It’d be nice to relax a bit after yesterday.”
Jackie looked at her watch. “The shops start to close around one, and it’s half-ten now.”
“We won’t take long, Mum. Just let us get off our feet a mo’.”
“Alright. Maybe you can tell me what happened...you were in such a rush last time. I’ll go fix you all a cuppa.” Jackie gave Rose’s cheek a fond pat and started towards the kitchen, but turned back around and pulled Rose into a hug instead. She murmured something that the Doctor couldn’t hear, but Rose’s eyes were wet again.
Then Jackie turned around and crushed him into a another hug. “Thank you, Doctor, for bringing my baby home for Christmas. Thank you.”
The Doctor actually hugged Jackie back this time. “My pleasure, Jackie.”
She stepped away, her face shining with tears again, and brought her hand up. The Doctor flinched, but she simply patted his cheek with a smile. “You’re not such a bad sort after all, are ya?”
“Well,” Jack said, breaking the moment. “I keep trying to make him into more of a bad sort, but he’s just so darned good.”
The Doctor scowled at Jack, but Jackie grinned at the American. “Oh, that accent is gonna do me right in, it is. Alright then, I’m off to make that tea. You lot settle in, put your feet up.”
Jack watched Jackie leave with a smile, then wasted no time in doing what he was told. The Doctor tugged on Rose’s elbow as soon as Jackie was out of sight and dragged her towards the door for a little privacy.
She wrapped her arms around his neck, and he pulled her as close as possible without thinking on it. “Thank you, Doctor. You’ve made her so happy. S’means so much to her,” she whispered into his neck, and planted a little kiss there.
The Doctor tamped down a not-insignificant flare of desire at the feel of her lips on his neck. “How about you?” he asked.
She arched herself against him, pulling her face away to look at him while leaving the rest of her body pressed intimately against his. He stifled a groan and did everything he could to suppress his body’s reaction to her.
She smiled. “Of course it means the world to me to be with my mum at Christmas, but it’s better ‘cause you’re here. And you need to behave,” she said with a cheeky grin and flick of her eyes downwards, to where he pressed against her abdomen..
“Bit difficult when you’re around. Trying to, though, me.”
She giggled, then stood on tiptoe to kiss him sweetly. “Good. Good that you’re tryin’ and good that it’s …hard.”
He narrowed his eyes at her and pursed his lips as if to admonish her, but Rose just giggled again.
“I don’t want to tell your mum about us just yet, Rose.” He said it abruptly, without preamble, and it had the effect of cold water on both of them.
Rose frowned and took a step back from him. He flexed his fingers to keep from grabbing for her, to tug her back where she belonged. “Why not?” she asked in a small voice. “You ashamed?”
“No, no, nothing like that. I just...this is the first time she’s ever looked at me without looking like an angry xohan about to charge. Don’t want to bollocks that up, me. Kinda nice, her not wanting to kill me.”
Rose gave him another cheeky grin, her tongue between her teeth. “You sayin’ you like my mum?”
“Let’s not push it.”
She tittered and put her hand on his chest. “I won’t tell her, but I dunno how I’m gonna keep my hands off you.”
The Doctor groaned. He’d been wondering the same thing.
He changed the subject, reaching into his coat pocket and pulling out a small, rectangular bit of plastic.
“Here,” he said, handing her the psychic credit card. “Go shopping with your mum, and have a nice day together. Jack and I will be in the TARDIS when you get back.”
Rose nodded. “You coming to tea when we get in?”
“Will if you want me to.”
She offered him a brilliant smile. “Course I do.”
“Then I’ll be here. And I’ll behave.”
“Pity that.”
“Oi, you two! Tea!” Jackie called from the lounge. The Doctor gave Rose one more smoldering look when Jackie turned away, then the two of them returned to the lounge to have a cuppa and tell Jackie a bit about the last 24 hours - two months for her. The Doctor plopped in a soft armchair and pulled his tea to him: Rose perched herself on the arm of his chair and winked down at him when nobody was looking.
The heat in her eyes sent a tingle down his spine. It was going to be a long holiday.
~*~O~*~
“So what does himself like?” Jackie asked when they got off the bus and started down the pavement.
“What do you mean?”
“The Doctor. What does he like? Jack, too, I suppose. Can’t leave him out; he helped bring you home.”
“That he did,” Rose agreed. She entertained the thought of telling her mother how she’d actually been the one to save them for a moment, but elected to keep that information to herself for the time being. If it garnered favor for the Doctor and Jack in her mother’s eyes, she’d let that sleeping dog lie.
“So, what should I get them?”
“Mum, you really don’t have to -”
“‘Course I do,” Jackie protested. “You can’t have a guest at Christmas without a gift.”
Rose sighed and went along with it. Truth was, she wanted to pick up a little something for each of them, too - even if it was with the Doctor’s psychic credit card.
“Alright, mum, but you have to let me pay for it, yeah? You didn’t budget for this.”
Jackie scowled for a moment and said, “We’ll see” just before she ducked into a shop. Rose followed with a rueful shake of her head.
~*~O~*~
Rose steered her mum in her purchases, and they ended up with a couple of jumpers for the Doctor (”That’s boring, Rose, surely he must want something more interesting than jumpers”). Rose tugged her Mum into a used bookstore and searched the old, leather-bound editions, hoping something would jump out at her. She found a book of Japanese folklore and fairy tales, blushing just a little at the memory of their night in Kyoto less than two days ago, and hoping maybe the Doctor would read it to her. Biting her lip, she stowed the purchase in her bag and set out to find more gifts for the two men in her life. They stopped at a coffee shop and she and Jackie each had a hot cocoa, setting their bags down for a bit before they trod on. The two women decided to each pick up a little something else, and Rose picked out a new razor for the Doctor and several pairs of socks for Jack with amusing little patterns on them. Finally, they headed back to the flat.
The Doctor and Jack weren’t there, of course. She hadn’t expected them to be, but she sent the Doctor a text.
[Rose] 24/12/06 - 1:24pm: We’re back
[Doctor] 24/12/06 - 1:26pm: Have fun?
[Rose] 24/12/06 - 1:29pm: We did. :)
[Rose] 24/12/06 - 1:29pm: When are you lot coming up?
[Doctor] 24/12/06 - 1:30pm: What time should we be there?
[Rose] 24/12/06 - 1:33pm: Half six? Mum’s turkey is always good
[Doctor] 24/12/06 - 1:34pm: Looking forward to it
[Rose] 24/12/06 - 1:34pm: You are not, haha
[Rose] 24/12/06 - 1:35pm: You lot could come up sooner tho if you want. Don't have to
[Doctor] 24/12/06 - 1:38pm: Spend the day with your mum. I have you all the time, but she doesn’t see you much
[Rose] 24/12/06 - 1:40pm: I have more fun with you, tho.
[Doctor] 24/12/06 - 1:42pm: Go on, have some beans and toast with your mum.
[Rose] 24/12/06 - 1:45pm: Haha you’re funny
[Doctor] 24/12/06 - 1:46: Impressively funny, me
[Rose] 24/12/06 - 1:46: Arent you just
Rose giggled and slipped her phone into her pocket, turning back to the dough her mother had her kneading at the counter.
Jackie cut her eyes at her daughter. “What’s himself say, then?”
Rose shrugged, trying to hide her smile. “Just talkin’ about what time he should come up.”
“And that’s all, eh?”
Rose blushed a little, but kept her face passive. “That’s all.”
Jackie kept her face deceptively smooth as she chopped the potatoes. “How long have the two of you been shaggin’?”
Rose whirled around with wide eyes and a slack jaw. “What?!”
“I asked how long the two of you have been shaggin’?” she repeated as she continued to prepare the potatoes.
“We’re not -”
Jackie turned then and put her hands on her hips, one of them holding the large knife she’d forgotten to put down in her fist so that it pointed out from her body. “Don’t lie to me, missy. I’m your mother and know you inside and out. I was there when you came home and told me you had a crush on Chad Andrews when you were a kid, and I’ve been there every time you’ve been ‘in love’ since.” Her tone was derisive, almost mocking on the words ‘in love’. It grated Rose. This was absolutely nothing like a crush she had when she was fourteen.
“I know that look you’ve got, like you’re eyein’ the best thing you’ve ever seen in a shop window and you’ll do anything to get it. He’s wearin’ the same look. Either you’re shaggin’ or you will be soon.”
Rose was mortified and her mind raced. Jackie must have noticed the wheels turning behind her eyes because she sighed and forged ahead. “M’not cross, Rose. Don’t understand it, but m’not cross. I just don’t want you to do something stupid.”
“Stupid like what?” Rose challenged.
“Like going off and getting up the duff with an alien’s baby.”
Rose shook her head and turned back to kneading the dough, using a bit more force than necessary. “You’re barmy, you are.”
“Rose Marion Tyler, look me in the eye and tell me you’re not sleeping with that man.” Rose pounded the dough with a bit more force and said nothing. “S’what I thought.”
“We can’t get pregnant, mum. His DNA is different from mine, we’re not compatible.”
“Seems you’re compatible enough,” Jackie muttered, turning back to her potatoes. Rose’s face grew hot.
She turned around to face her mother. “It’s not like that, mum. It’s not like he’s some...some exotic space shag. Nor am I.”
“What’s it like, then? He your boyfriend?”
Rose realized in that moment that there was no definition for the two of them or their brand-new relationship. They just...were.
“He’s not my boyfriend. He’s better than that. He’s….”
Jackie’s voice softened and she turned her head to look at Rose. “You really love him, don’t you?”
Rose looked at her mum’s face for a few minutes, then nodded. “Yeah, Mum. I do.”
Jackie just stared at Rose for a second, and returned to chopping. “Tell me this, Rose. Are you ever coming home?”
It would be easy to toss out a flippant remark about coming for visits, Rose thought, but that’s not what her mother was asking and she knew it. She decided it was best to be honest. “My home is with him, now, Mum. I’ll go where he goes and live on the TARDIS. With him.”
“Until he gets tired of you and sends you back to me.”
“It’s not going to happen, Mum,” Rose said with a bit more confidence than she felt. “We talked about it. He wants me with him, and I want to be with him. He gave me a necklace that’s unbreakable to hold the TARDIS key. No one can ever take it from me, not even him. It was useful and symbolic, see? The TARDIS is my home, as long as I want it. And I want it forever.”
Jackie didn’t look up when she nodded but sniffed a moment later, and when she tipped the cutting board into a bowl, she wiped her eyes.
“Hey,” Rose said, wiping her floured hands off on her apron. “Mum, s’okay.” She tugged on her mum’s shoulder until Jackie turned around, then pulled her into her arms. “S’okay, Mum. The Doctor is going to take care of me. Jack, too. They’re very protective.”
“He told me once he would do everything he could to keep you safe. And I know he sent you home when he was afraid you’d die, but I just...I can’t help but worry. And I miss you so much.” Jackie’s cries rang in Rose’s ear and twisted at Rose’s heart.
“I know, Mum.” Rose rubbed circles on Jackie’s back and fought her own round of tears. “I know. I miss you, too.”
~*~O~*~
Rose recognized Jack’s knock at the door and went to get it, wiping her hands on her now-filthy apron. When she pulled the door open she found Jack standing there with the Doctor beside him, a pie in his hand. He gave her a brilliant smile.
“Can’t go to dinner without bringing something!” Jack said cheerfully, nudging the Doctor out of the way and pecking Rose on the cheek. Rose smiled at him, then stepped aside to let the two of them in. Jack came by her first, smirking down at Rose’s dirty apron. “Aww, Rosie, been slaving away over a hot stove?”
“Git,” she muttered with a smile. The former Time Agent just laughed and headed into the kitchen, where he commenced to flirt outrageously with her mum.
The Doctor came in and closed the door behind himself, smiling down at Rose. She rested her hands on his shoulders, then stood to kiss him slowly, trusting Jack to keep her mother busy, nibbling his lip before she pulled away.
“What was that for?” he asked, looking over Rose’s shoulder to make sure they were alone. “Not that I mind…”
“To soften the blow, I reckon. Mum knows.”
The Doctor swore. “I told you not to tell her, Rose!”
“I didn’t!” she retorted. “She guessed! Apparently, it’s all obvious when we look at each other.”
His face went blank for a few seconds before a slow grin spread across it. She wanted to snog it right off of him. “Yeah, I suppose it is. Is she cross?”
Rose shook her head. “No, doesn’t seem to be. She’s a bit sad because she thinks she’ll never see me again, though.”
“Ah,” the Doctor said. “That’s where this comes in.” He pulled a square, flat package from the bigger-on-the-inside pocket of his jacket and told Rose what he intended to give her mother. She looked up at the Doctor with wide eyes.
“D’you mean it?”
“Yes. But I wanted to run it over with you, first.”
She leapt forward, wrapping her arms around him and beaming.
He returned her smile. “So I’m guessing s’alright with you, then?” he asked dryly.
“Mmmhmm,” she said.
He turned his head to kiss her hair, his smile softening. “Good.”
~*~O~*~
The Doctor was surprised to find that Jackie really was a good cook and that Rose had been right - the turkey was superb. He and Jack both had seconds (and Jack had thirds) of the sweet potato casserole, saying he hadn’t had any sweet potatoes since the last time he was in the States.
“S’always been a favorite of Rose’s,” Jackie said, looking at her daughter with fondness. “Shireen’s mom is from the colonies and had them for dinner one night when Rose was there. Rose called them ‘candy potatoes’, and I’ve tried to make them for her on special occasions ever since.”
“They’re delicious,” the Doctor said sincerely.
Jackie smiled, pleased. “Good.”
Rose looked around the table at everyone’s plates, then asked, “Gifts then pie and tea, yeah?”
“I suppose,” Jackie said. “Oof, I’m full.”
“You sit there, Mrs. Tyler,” Jack said, both his words and actions smooth and suave. He got to his feet, flourishing his napkin as he did. “The Doctor and I will clear the table. Don’t you worry.”
He shot the Doctor a little raised eyebrow. The Doctor was puzzled, but got up from his seat anyway. “Yes, you just sit,” he said to the ladies. “We’ll be right back.”
In the kitchen, he cornered Jack. “What’re you doing?”
“Helping you out, pal. Trying to get you in good with the mother-in-law.”
The Doctor rolled his eyes. “She’s not my mother-in-law, Jack.”
Jack put the turkey on the counter and smirked. “Not yet...”
~*~O~*~
Just as the Doctor and Jack came back in to join the ladies, there were two short raps on the front door and they heard it open. A voice called out, “Jacks? Happy Christmas, Jacks!”
“It’s Mickey,” Jackie pronounced. “Did you ring him today to tell him you were here?”
Rose shook her head, “No, I was with you!”
Mickey entered the room and stopped short when he saw Jackie’s company.
“You’re back,” he breathed.
“I am,” Rose agreed with a smile. She barely got the words out before he had crushed her into a hug. The Doctor did his best to ignore the spark of jealousy that arose at seeing Rose’s friend with his hands on her, or Rose’s obvious joy at seeing him again.
Mickey stepped away after a second (a second too long for the Doctor) and turned around to look at the other two men. “Doc,” he said, putting his hand out. “Welcome back.”
“Thanks, Mickey,” the Doctor said, shaking the young man’s hand. Rose smiled over Mickey’s shoulder, and he knew she was aware of the level of restraint it took not to call the boy an idiot.
“And Captain Cheesecake!” Mickey put his hand out to Jack.
“Mickey Mouse!” Jack smiled back.
“You’re just in time for gifts and dessert, Mickey,” Jackie chimed in. “Plenty to go around. Still loads of dinner left, too.”
“Oh, yeah, I’ll be havin’ some of your turkey. I came by here to take you to dinner if you wanted, but you got that covered.” He smiled at Rose. The Doctor’s insides tightened again for a second.
“Well sit! Eat!” Jackie said, now in mother-hen mode. “Here’s a cracker for you...oh, good, it’s blue. You like blue. We’ll wait on you to finish, then have dessert!”
The Doctor saw Rose wipe a stray tear when she thought nobody would notice and felt better about his decisions. The decision to visit today, to stay with Rose, and to visit more often - all were good ones, he thought. He settled back down into his chair to chat while Mickey ate. Rose’s hand slipped under the table to grab his, and he gave her a squeeze and a smile.
Domestics with Rose? S’not so bad. Not bad at all.
~*~O~*~
Rose’s excitement through the exchange of gifts was overwhelming: she felt as if she were vibrating a little. The Doctor liked the jumpers she got him, even though the blue and burgundy were a bit lighter than he usually wore. Jack laughed at the socks patterned with hearts and cupids, then dragged a giggling Jackie to the mistletoe to prove just how much of a cupid he was. Rose’s mum had bought her some new earrings and a few articles of clothes. Rose was grateful: running for your life with the Doctor and Jack tended to be rough on one’s fashions.
She wanted to give Jackie her gifts after everyone else had opened theirs, not wanting to miss her mum’s reaction to the alien jewelry she’d bought at one of the festivals they had attended a few weeks prior. Her mother gasped, claimed it was the most beautiful thing she’d ever seen and squeezed Rose in a tight hug.
Rose turned her eyes to the Doctor expectantly, and Jackie looked between the two of them.
The Doctor cleared his throat. “Erm, yeah. I’ve got a little something for you too, Jackie.” He pulled the square package out of his pocket again and handed it to her.
Jackie tore the paper and looked at the gift. It was a monthly calendar, and the pictures were all of astronomical objects. “A 2007 space calendar?”
“Aye,” the Doctor said, looking to Rose for reassurance, then back at a confused Jackie. “See, Jackie, I want you to go through that calendar and mark any special events or holidays coming up this year so I can be sure not to forget to bring Rose back for them. And I’m-” he hesitated for a second. “My gift to you is that I promise to bring Rose home a couple of times each month to see you.”
Jackie moved too quickly for him to react more than to raise his arms, and she knocked him to the back of the couch with the force of her hug. Rose’s own eyes watered when she watched her mum right herself and wipe her eyes, smearing the makeup she’d so carefully repaired. “Thank you.” Rose sniffed a little and looked at the other two men who were beaming, too, and tried not to giggle at the Doctor’s little scowl in Mickey’s direction.
“S’my pleasure.”
“Right!” Rose announced. “Dessert! I’m ready for Mum’s pie!”
~*~O~*~
They stayed through Christmas and Boxing Day, and Rose really did appear to be having fun. On the 27th the Doctor informed Rose that if she wanted to stay through New Years, he’d be happy to, as long as he got the midnight kiss. She gave him her tongue-touched smile and promised.
When she turned away, he kicked himself a little for lying to her. He didn’t want to stay.
It wasn’t the domestics of the thing, surprisingly enough. He was a little stunned to find that he didn’t mind that so much. Jackie was much kinder to him since he’d sent Rose back and she seemed to accept that he and Rose were...whatever they were.
Mickey was obnoxious but no more than usual, really. Less so, if the Doctor were being honest about it (when it came to Mickey, he’d rather complain internally than be honest). The younger man seemed to have accepted that whatever he had once had with Rose was over. In a burst of pity that surprised him, the Doctor had resolved not to touch Rose at all while Mickey was around. No sense rubbing salt in the Idiot’s wound.
Rose didn’t seem to be on board with the plan he’d set for himself and carried on just as she always had. The contact was casual and no different than the other times Mickey had seen the two of them together: no passionate snogs or copping a feel. Mickey seemed to get the hint anyway; Rose had moved on.
The Doctor had also been hesitant to display affection to Rose in front of Jackie, citing propriety but actually fearing retribution. This wasn’t going so well for him. He’d become accustomed to touching and holding Rose at his leisure, even before Kyoto and the change in their relationship. The lack of contact with her was damaging his ability to think clearly. Jackie had decreed that if Rose was at home, she needed to stay at home. This prevented him from dragging her to bed with him every night so that he could wrap himself around her and satisfy his addiction to her touch, her nearness. After three days of not touching Rose at all, he planted himself beside her on the couch and put his arm around her, tugging her against him where she belonged. He’d heaved a sigh of relief at her proximity before looking at Jackie with a stubborn, daring look in his blue eyes. The older woman had just snorted a laugh and shook her head at him, as if he were an old fool.
He was, of course, but that was beside the point.
Not being as near to Rose as he wanted was a recipe for a slow, painful death, he thought. He’d been on his best behavior while they were in London with Jackie, keeping his hands, lips, and other interested body parts (mostly) off of Rose for an entire week. It became a habit for him and Jack to join Rose and Jackie in the flat to watch telly or play Cluedo for a couple of hours each night before the women went to bed. After the first couple of days, the Doctor had bent his own rules enough to steal a kiss every night when he and Jack went back down to the TARDIS. It wasn’t nearly enough; he was used to more time with Rose, he craved more time with Rose, but he made do. Rose was enjoying the time with her mother.
Were it not for that constant craving for her, he thought this might have been quite a pleasant holiday. As it was, he wanted to drag her back to the TARDIS, shut the doors on the rest of the world and keep her there. With him. Indefinitely. But the TARDIS needed repairs after he’d flown it into the middle of a Dalek fleet and Rose had torn the console open to look into the heart. It just made sense to do those repairs somewhere she would be occupied and happy.
He was surprised when he found that he missed her incessant chatter, and that the silence she usually drowned out was much more distracting than he remembered. He called out to her sometimes, asking for a tool, beginning a story or asking where she’d like to go next, just expecting her to be there. The fraction of a second’s worth of despair and fear he felt when she didn’t answer was a little worrying.
When had he become so utterly addicted to her?
The ‘when’ didn’t matter so much, he supposed. The fact was that he was hers. And he was addicted.
Jack and Jackie were getting on like houses, flirting outrageously with each other. The Doctor was amused to watch the Lothario Time Agent putting a modified version of his skills to work on Rose’s mother, and it was even more entertaining to watch Jackie flirt back. They enjoyed each other and never hesitated in their suggestive banter, even under the watchful eye of Rose. There didn’t seem to be any genuine feeling behind their flirting, however, and the Doctor got the impression that Jack was just keeping himself in practice.
Finally - finally - after seven long days, six even longer nights, and a haircut for Rose, the clock struck midnight and the Doctor had made it. He got the first kiss from Rose all week that wasn’t stolen (he studiously ignored Jackie’s pursed lips and furrowed brow), and he, Rose, and Jack flew off into the Vortex the next day after a goodbye lunch with Jackie, the first day of a New Year.
Notes:
Coming soon: Back to the TARDIS, a handful of adventures, and "What's that smell?"
**Notice: the following is possibly a touch spoilery? But not really, I don't think. Sorry for the long note!**
The Doctor is going to remain head-over-heels in love with Rose; he got all of his angst, doubt and confusion about being with her out in this fic's prequel, Healing. He is - and will remain - a besotted old fool in love. Besotted!Nine is my favorite thing in the world, and I'd like to play with it a bit.The next couple of chapters aren't going to be very adventure-heavy, they are a bit introspective, quite fluffy and set up the main plot. If I could change anything about canon, the first would be that Nine and Rose never actually got together (which, of course, would lead to TenRose), and I'd eradicate Donna's memory loss. When I set out to write this, I really, really wanted Nine and Rose to have a little period of happy, fluffy togetherness without any life-threatening conflict or regeneration. I hope you'll humor me and let them have this happy little time.
That said: This fic is getting pretty long. I've got four more chapters written after this, and am working on another one. At this point, it's looking like it's going to top out around 20-ish chapters. The chapters, to me, are like one-shots that build on each other. I can condense it by taking some chapters and just making them one-shots in this 'verse, but unless I get a groundswell of support for that idea, I'm just going to leave it as it is. Let me know what you think? :)
Chapter 6: Olfactory Realization
Summary:
Something was off. Something had changed. The Doctor felt it in his bones with a certainty he’d rarely felt before. He couldn’t put his finger on what it was just yet, but it gave him a slightly ominous feeling. Oddly, the vague fear he felt was mixed with something like excitement.
Notes:
Happy New Year!!
A little bit of business:
I'm going to be working towards updating every Tuesday and Friday. I may miss one every now and then, but to be honest this fic has my full attention right now. I'm working poor tenroseforeverandever into the ground, bless her heart.Your kudos, comments, bookmarks, subscriptions, reblogs, and likes are everything to me, and I appreciate every single one. The DW fandom has spoiled me beyond redemption, and you may be stuck with me from here on out. You guys are sweeter than a baby's kiss, and I love each and every one of you. Thank you, from the bottom of my little black-as-coal heart.
As a reminder: I own nothing. BBC owns it all.
If I may ask another favor, please see the note at the bottom.
As for this chapter: Behold, the tags.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Well, you took me in, you stole my heart,
I cannot roam no more.
Because love, it stays within you,
It does not wash up on a shore.
But a fighting man forgets each cut
Each knock, each bruise, each fall,
But a fighting man cannot forget
Why his love don't roam no more.
Oh, reel me in, my precious girl,
Come on, take me home.
'Cause my body's tired of travelling
And my heart don't wish to roam.
Murray Gold, Love Don't Roam
Doctor Who Series 1&2 Original Soundtrack
~*~O~*~
Something was off. Something had changed. The Doctor felt it in his bones with a certainty he’d rarely felt before. He couldn’t put his finger on what it was just yet, but it gave him a slightly ominous feeling. Oddly, the vague fear he felt was mixed with something like excitement.
His new relationship with Rose could account for the hopefulness and contentment he felt, but the undercurrent of worry that came along with it was troubling. He was a bit anxious about what it could mean: for him, for Rose, and for the two of them together.
Oh, Rose. He’d honestly never been happier in his long, long lives and he thanked every deity he was aware of for the unbelievable gift of having her in his life. He was unworthy, undeserving, and he knew it; everyone who met them knew it, probably. She’d saved him, she’d healed him, and now he knew she loved him. The Doctor had seen some unbelievable, miraculous things in his 900-plus years, but Rose Tyler loving him, wanting to be with him, going so far as to take the Vortex into herself to save him... that blew his frankly magnificent mind.
He’d spend the rest of his lives trying to prove to her just how much he loved her, just what she meant to him. He didn’t want to know where he’d be without her, was doing his best to shut that behind him. The Time Lords had taught him that emotions were weakness, and after the Time War, he’d believed them. Rose had changed all of that. She’d pulled him out of the black hell he’d been living in his mind and given him a hope he didn’t deserve, a joy he didn’t believe was possible before. And if it took lifetimes, he’d justify his being by becoming the man Rose already thought he was.
But something was off. Something was coming, he could feel it in the proverbial wind.
~*~O~*~
When they’d left Jackie’s, Rose had complained of being tired and asked to stay in for a bit instead of jumping right into an adventure. The Doctor had been disappointed, as had Jack, but neither of them were willing to say no to her. Both figured she just needed a day to recuperate from the exhaustion of spending a week with Jackie.
The idea of a quiet evening on the ship wasn’t at all unappealing to the Doctor, so after he piloted the TARDIS away from the Estate, he told her to go take a nice, long bubble bath and meet him and Jack in the library. When he’d told her that they would watch whatever she wanted, she’d grinned and told him to prepare for something romantic.
The wink she gave him just before she gave him a light kiss said clearly that she wasn’t just talking about the film. He shivered.
Rose wandered into the library an hour and a half later (ninety-three minutes and fifteen seconds, actually...he always marked the time that she was away from him; couldn’t seem to help himself) wearing flannel sleep pants and a camisole top. Her hair spilled over her shoulders and her face was clean of makeup.
His hearts stumbled when he saw her: she was stunning. Rose was always beautiful - he’d never seen her as anything but - but when she was at her most relaxed and natural state, she was devastating.
“Feeling better, Rosie?” Jack asked as Rose settled in next to the Doctor.
“Much,” she answered him with a smile. “Bubble baths cure all manner of ills.”
The Doctor chuckled and tugged her a little closer. She plucked at his pajama pants and t-shirt, grinning. “Seems like everyone is dressed down tonight.”
He shrugged. “Figured snuggling up against leather and jeans all the time was probably a bit uncomfortable for you, so I changed into something softer.”
Rose beamed up at him. “You’re so sweet.”
“Oi! Take that back,” he protested, unable to conceal the smirk that curled his lips.
“Nothing doing,” she replied, sticking her tongue between her teeth. “To me, you are sweet.”
The Doctor leaned down and gave her a soft kiss.
“Ugh, get a room, you two,” Jack called out, a smile in his voice.
Rose pulled back and looked at the Doctor with a happy expression and he was quite sure that the look he gave her in return was nothing short of blissful. The barking, joyful laugh he let out when Rose turned around and stuck her tongue out at Jack was involuntary. He had his Rose back on his TARDIS. Very soon she’d be wrapped in his arms in bed for only the second time. He’d waited a year for the first taste of her, and a week for the moment he knew was coming tonight. He had every right to act like a giddy old fool.
Jack laughed, too. “So, what are you planning on putting us through tonight, Rosie?” he inquired, drawing his friends’ attention back to the blank screen before them.
Rose rolled her eyes. “A little bit of romance won’t kill you, Jack.”
“‘Course not!” he said, indignant. “I’m quite romantic.”
The Doctor snorted. “Whatever it takes to get the knickers off.”
Jack gave a dignified sniff. “I’m a gentleman all the time, I’ll have you know.”
The Doctor opened his mouth to retort and Rose interjected, “I was thinking about watching The Holiday.”
“Suits me. I’ve never seen it,” the Doctor said.
“I saw an advert for it last time we went to Mum’s. It looked good.”
“Is that the one with the blonde American in it?”
“Cameron Diaz, yeah.” she answered Jack.
He grinned wolfishly. “Oh, I like her.”
The Doctor rolled his eyes. “Down, boy. You like everybody.” He plucked his sonic from its resting place beside his feet on the coffee table and aimed it at the screen: within a few seconds the movie started.
Rose gave a happy sigh and nuzzled into the Doctor. The sweet floral-sugary-fruity smell of her shampoo coupled with the warm, spicy scent of her lotion swirled around him...but there was an undertone of something else. Something different...something he hadn’t ever smelled on Rose before.
That’s when it hit him: Rose’s smell was off. He smelled hormones: new hormones, at a higher level than he should. Hormones he shouldn’t be smelling, not coming from Rose.
Human pregnancy hormones.
He stiffened and Rose looked up at him. “You alright?”
“‘Course I am,” he answered her with a tight smile. “Always alright, me.”
She cocked an eyebrow at him but seemed to accept his words. She leaned up, gave him a quick kiss, then nestled back into his broad chest. The Doctor’s smile faded as soon as she looked away and he sent a message to the TARDIS to run a scan on Rose. Eleven seconds later, the old girl, his faithful ship, sent an affirmative response through their telepathic link, and her own happiness.
Rose was pregnant. Terror washed over him… but behind the terror, bright joy and some mad hope.
~*~O~*~
Rose fell asleep midway through the movie, and he’d smiled at her: her blonde hair was falling over her face, she was softly snoring, her head nuzzled against his chest.
Pregnant, he thought when he drew a tendril of her hair back to tuck it behind her ear and caught another whiff of her hormone-laden scent. It should have been biologically impossible! Gallifreyan TNA and human DNA weren’t supposed to be compatible. The triple strands from him were simply not meant to mix with the double strands from her.
And yet, here she was, snuffling in her sleep, lying in his arms and throwing off human chorionic gonadotropin left, right, and center. Nine days after the night they’d made love, a tiny, fertilized egg had implanted into her uterine wall. The very beginnings of a baby.
A baby. The thought rocked him. Rose was pregnant with his child. Even if that child were nothing more than a ball of cells right now, it would grow and develop and become a tiny...what? Was her DNA or his TNA dominant in this child? Would it be human or Gallifreyan? The Doctor had no way of knowing; this was something he’d never experienced before. In new, uncharted territory, he was.
The sense of dread and foreboding he’d felt earlier suddenly made sense and he knew that this had been the change he’d felt on the wind: he was going to be a father again.
Oh, sodden hell, what were they going to do?
It wasn’t that he didn’t want this. He’d found himself craving a domestic-type life not long after Rose had come along. Traveling was still appealing, certainly, and he was sure the day would never come that he didn’t enjoy a good adventure. But it was nearly impossible to beat the feeling of Rose in his arms, content and safe. For the first time in all of his lives, staying out of trouble didn’t seem boring, or like a bad thing. Life as a nomad didn’t hold the same appeal it always had. All of the sudden, his life up until now felt like a string of incompletes. He didn’t want to run away from this.
The concession to domestics was never a consideration when he had contemplated a relationship with Rose. He’d thought, when he condemned himself to the loneliness and misery that he’d believed he deserved, that he wanted a stark, spartan life. But her warm touches around his TARDIS were fantastic and he was happy with them. He was happy with Rose, and he wanted her and everything that came with her. If that meant that someone else besides the TARDIS knew precisely how he took his tea, or how to make him smile , or when to call him on his bullshit, or any other of the myriad things that came along with being a couple, well, he was in for a pound. If it gave him a weakness, he was fine with that. Rose was his Vesta, his goddess of home and hearth, and he loved nothing more than worshiping at her feet.
But a baby! Did he want to be a father again? Well, quite frankly, fatherhood hadn’t suited the first time around. He had no reason to believe that he’d be any better at it now, in this gruff, grumpy body. It hadn’t even been an idea he’d had to dismiss: it simply was not something he’d ever considered or thought about, or even wanted to consider or think about, really. He never believed he’d have another chance at fatherhood. Now, though, Rose’s womb was cradling a tiny little bunch of cells that he’d helped put there and the question was on the table.
The film ended and he put on an action movie for he and Jack. Rose readjusted herself, lying his head in her lap and he caught a whiff of her hormones, intoxicating him. Rose made a happy little sound when he stroked her hair idly then sought out her hand with his, lacing their fingers.
Domestics with Rose really was fantastic.
It shocked him when he realized then that he did want this baby after all. He was sure that he did - or would, when the shock wore off. He had always regretted his earlier shortcomings as a father. Now he had a chance to do better. Rose - beautiful, amazing Rose, his precious girl - was impossibly pregnant. And he was certain that once the thought settled in, he’d grasp at that chance with both hands.
The thought of Rose, her body blooming with child and radiating happiness sprung to mind. He imagined her, rocking a tiny bundle with a pink face, her head bent low to nuzzle the baby. Their baby. His hearts clenched with desire.
But how would Rose respond to the news? She was only twenty, and even in Earth years he knew that was young for motherhood. A baby would change everything: for each of them and for them as a unit. He knew that Rose loved traveling, exploring, adventuring with him. Would she be willing to give that up for a baby, his baby? Would he be willing to give it up?
Well, yes, he would. He’d meant what he’d told Lynda-with-a-Y on the Gamestation - all he was after was a quiet life. Somehow, in a way he couldn’t quite put his finger on or explain, this felt right.
But then, they’d been properly together for barely a week. They’d kissed for the first time not quite two weeks ago. Now this? The two of them had orbited around each other a long while, months and months of longing looks and not-so-accidental-or-innocent touches while they worked up the courage to do something about the attraction, but they hadn’t been a - well, a couple (might as well call it what it was) for long at all. It was too soon, he thought. Much too soon. If she had this baby she would be stuck. Stuck with a baby and (if he were lucky) stuck with him.
Would she want that? Would she accept his baby? He’d respect whatever wishes she had, but he was afraid. He was well-acquainted with the fear that she would leave; although he’d had a bit of a respite from that fear since they’d confessed their love for each other.
Now the fear that she wouldn't want this child and would leave him was nearly overwhelming. He really couldn’t stand the thought. If she decided that he had lied somehow about his ability to get her pregnant and got angry with him… It didn’t bear thinking about. Already, guilt flooded him and he dreaded the negative reaction that she would surely have.
She would notice changes in her body very, very soon. He had to tell her, he knew, no matter how terrifying the prospect was... and his time was limited. Besides, it was her body that this was happening to. By rights, she should have been the first to know, and then come to tell him. The Doctor attempted to assuage his own guilt, telling himself that it wasn’t his fault he could smell human hormones. But if she found out that he had known all along and never let her in on the secret her body was keeping...no. He had to tell her, and soon.
The Doctor took a deep breath and scrubbed his face with his hands. He was surprised to find that now, after thinking things through, he wasn’t a bit unhappy about having a baby with Rose, and had a sneaking feeling that given more than a couple of hours to mull it over, he’d be overjoyed.
His fear lay in her response. The question now was how Rose would react.
His eyes flicked up to Jack, sitting in an armchair with his legs draped over the side. He’d like to ask his friend for advice, but to let someone else know before the mother seemed wrong. He’d have to do this on his own.
Tomorrow, he thought. I’ll take her to dinner tomorrow night, maybe on Raeter, and tell her. We’ll get chips, and maybe that would soften the blow. Maybe she won’t hate me. Maybe she won’t leave me.
~*~O~*~
As it turned out, the Doctor didn’t tell her over chips while they were on Raeter. Nor did he tell her the next day on Simag II when he took her shopping. He didn’t tell her when they lay curled together each night or in the afterglow of their lovemaking. It took three days before the Doctor could work up the courage to tell Rose that she was pregnant, and when he finally did it came in a single burst of courage. Time was running out before she missed her period and he couldn’t wait any longer. He shouldn’t have waited at all, he chided himself. This was happening to her body, and she deserved to know.
He made up his mind that he simply had to do it. There was no avoiding this topic, it was going to come up eventually. But with each hour, his fear of her reaction grew - as did the baby.
“Rose,” he blurted as she slid into bed beside him on the third night. “I need to tell you something.”
She grinned and cuddled up next to him. “Mmm. Sounds ominous. What’s going on?”
He swallowed hard and looked up at the ceiling, as if to get reassurance from it. “Before I tell you this, I need you to know that I love you.”
Rose gave a little giggle. “I know that, and I love you, too. What’s so wrong that you have to reassure me?”
“Nothing is wrong, per se,” he hedged, then proceeded to stumble all over his words. “Or maybe it is. I don’t know. It depends… You may think... But it’s not wrong. Least, I don’t think so.”
She sat up, edging away from him, looking at him warily. “Okay, now you’re scaring me, Doctor.”
The Doctor sat up beside her, searching her face, willing himself to just spit it out. “You’re pregnant, Rose.” He slammed his eyes shut, then; he couldn’t bear to see her reaction.
She was silent for a moment and he opened one eye to look at her. Her face was blank, then her lips quirked up. “Nah,” she gave a disbelieving snort. “You’re taking the mick. I can’t be.”
“You are,” he murmured, instinctively reaching out for her then pulling back. “If you...well, I guess you could say we are.”
“Pull the other one.”
“I’m not kidding, Rose. You’re pregnant.”
“But I can’t be,” she insisted. “You said it wasn’t possible.”
He winced a little. “It wasn’t supposed to be. But you are.”
“I haven’t missed my period or anything.” There was the tiniest hint of desperation in her voice.
“The blastocyst implanted three days ago - er, the baby. The beginnings of a baby.”
Rose narrowed her eyes. “How would you know this?” she probed.
“I can...” he sighed before he went on. “I can smell the pregnancy hormones on you. As soon as a fertilized egg implants in a human, certain hormones are released. They started three days ago.”
“But I can’t be, Doctor,” and there was definitely fear behind her words now. “You said -”
“I know what I said,” he interrupted, “and I didn’t lie. I didn’t, Rose, I swear I didn’t.” His voice was pleading, needing to make her understand. “It was supposed to be impossible. We’re genetically incompatible, or so I thought.”
Rose’s eyes clouded with tears and she stared at him. He ached to pull her into his arms and hold her, but he refrained, clenching his fists and relaxing them in turn. She needed to process this on her own.
Twin teardrops spilled onto her cheeks, and he gave up his internal battle. Sod it, he thought as he tucked her onto his lap and against his chest.
“I’m so sorry, Rose. Don’t cry. Don’t ever cry, love. It’ll be alright, I promise.”
“Are you...” she started before she took a second to gather herself a little. “Are you gonna send me away now?” she asked in a quiet voice.
The Doctor set her back from him a little, taking her by the shoulders and looking into her watery brown eyes with determination. “Absolutely not. Never, Rose.”
“You said you’re sorry. What are you sorry for?”
“Getting you pregnant.”
“You don’t want a baby?”
“Only if you do.”
“Do you...” she began again. Her eyes darted around the room, looking everywhere but at him. “It’s just...I don’t know what to do! I don’t know how to be a mum, Doctor!” she cried.
The Doctor pulled her back into his arms and shushed her, relief flooding him. If she were concerned about impending motherhood, she was thinking about it, he knew. There was a chance she would decide to stay with him. “It’s okay,” he soothed her. “It’s all alright.”
“But we’ve only been...you know...together for a little while. A couple of weeks.”
“I know.”
“How did this happen?”
It sprung to his lips to be clever with her, to try to make her laugh, but he bit it back. “I have a theory,” he said instead. “Only a theory. But it’s a solid one.” She was silent for a moment then asked him to go on. “I think that when you became Bad Wolf, she may have altered your DNA to make us compatible.”
Rose digested this until her crying had subsided. She still lay nestled in his arms, silent save for the occasional snuffle. Finally, after what seemed like forever, she asked in a small voice, “Am I still human?”
“Yes. You’re a human.”
“What about the baby. Will it be human?”
“I don’t know, Rose, honestly. This is uncharted territory for me, too.”
She fell silent again for a long while, her sniffles tapering off to nothing. He held her, desperate to communicate his love and devotion to her through touch but refusing to broach the subject of telepathy. She was already overwhelmed. He felt her face screw up against his chest and his arms tightened reflexively around her.
“Do you...” she took a breath and wiped her eyes. “Do you want this, Doctor? Really? A baby, with me?”
His answer to that question was certain; it had been for three days, nearly from the first scent of her hormonal shift.
“Yes, Rose. I do.” He hesitated only a second before he added in a firmer voice, “but only if you do. This is your choice and I’m not going to push you either way. Whatever you decide, that’s what we’ll do.” His voice softened again. “But if you’re asking me if I want this baby, if I want to have a family with you, the answer is yes.”
She nodded and he rocked her, hoping to reassure her through the gentle motion of his body. She quieted and was silent a long while. The Doctor started to wonder if she had fallen asleep. He raised his head to check on her.
“Rose? You alright?”
She nodded. “I think I am, actually. It’s the oddest feeling, Doctor, but I feel like this was supposed to happen. Like...like it was some plan we weren’t aware of.”
The Doctor nodded. He’d felt that, too.
“I think this is the way it was always meant to be. I think...I think I want this. A family. With you.”
His body sagged with relief and he kissed her hair. “Me, too.”
“Really?” She leaned back from him and gave him a searching look. The Doctor got the impression she was searching for the truth, was looking to see if he were merely placating her.
“Yeah.”
“You’ll stay with me?” she asked again.
“Rampaging bilge snipe couldn’t drag me away from you, Rose Tyler.” His lips curved into a soft smile and he leaned forward, pressing his lips to hers. “I’m not going anywhere, love,” he murmured against her mouth. “Not as long as you’ll have me. I want this with you.”
“I love you,” she said. Then she smiled: a tiny, precious thing. “I’m going to be a mum, Doctor.”
He beamed, and brought her hand up to cup her cheek. “You are. And you’re going to be fantastic.”
Rose closed her eyes and leaned into his touch, then nodded a little in his hand, accepting his words. She looked so small, still a little unsure, and he wanted nothing more than to erase her uncertainty. “We’ll be fantastic, Rose. Both of us. Together.”
He nudged her nose with his own, seeking her attention and smiling at her when he got it. She rewarded him with an upturn of one corner of her mouth. The Doctor surrendered to the impulse to kiss her and darted his lips forward a couple of inches to press against hers.
He didn’t hesitate when her lips parted a little beneath his; he opened to her, and through the movements of their lips and tongues, they conveyed all of their love and desire. The kiss held fear and anxiety, but also reassurance. The stroking thumb on her cheek affirmed that he would be there with her, beside her, no matter what. The slide of her lips under his said that she was afraid, but trusted him to ease her through her anxiety. Without words, they affirmed that they were together - come what may.
His hand slowly drifted from her cheek down her neck and over her shoulder, sliding down her arm until he brought it to the place low on her abdomen where his child was growing. He covered her belly with his large hand and began to pull away from the kiss, giving her soft, slow little pecks until he was able to speak.
“Thank you, Rose. This is just...I don’t have the words. Thank you for giving me this; for giving me you. I don’t deserve you.” She smiled at him, but before she could answer he was pressing his mouth against hers, again. “Thank you,” he whispered between kisses. “Thank you.”
“Please, just...don’t ever leave me,” she said softly.
He put his finger under her chin. “Look at me, Rose,” he said, his voice low and a little fierce.
She raised her eyes to him. “I’m not leaving you. I don’t want to leave you, and couldn’t if I tried. Remember 1987? Remember the fight we had in your parents’ lounge? I couldn’t leave you, even then. You were exactly right. I just went to the TARDIS to cool off that day, I never could have flown away without you. And that was before we were together, before you were pregnant.”
Rose choked a little on the memory. Their trip to 1987 had been traumatic for her, he knew, and reliving it couldn’t be pleasant. He brought her eyes back up to his. “Get that thought out of your head, Rose Tyler. Don’t think on it. You’re mine, and I’m never letting you go. I want you with me, always.”
He wasn’t sure whose lips had found whose this time. All he knew was that one second he’d been looking into Rose’s eyes, trying to make her understand, and the next he was kissing her with the fiery intensity of a supernova. Rose’s hands roamed around to the back of his neck, holding him to her and making him shudder with soft scratches of her nails over his scalp. He released a small moan of pleasure into her mouth and she smiled against his kiss.
“Doctor?”
“Hmm?”
“Make love to me.”
“Your wish is my command, love.”
Notes:
Hi! Some of you may be terribly displeased with Nine's reaction. It's not the typical response one sees from the Doctor in fics like this, and I know it. Thank you for not sending me hate mail over it, I appreciate that.
If I'm in a position where I need to defend my characterization, I would point to
1) the lyrics at the beginning of this chapter,
2) the quote from Bad Wolf - "Believe it or not, all I'm after is a quiet life." and
3) the Doctor's wistful look/comment to Sarah and Stuart at their wedding, about the life he's never had.If you'd like to talk to me about it, I'd love to talk to you! :) <3
Chapter 7: The First Five Weeks
Summary:
Rose was going to have his baby. She hadn’t rejected the idea, and she was going to give him a child. He was going to have another crack at fatherhood, a family with Rose, and the thought was thrilling beyond any words he knew. He daydreamed, thinking of a little girl crawling into his lap and calling him ‘Daddy’, or maybe a little boy with dark hair Rose’s eyes.
He didn’t care, really. Boy or girl - he just didn't care. The woman next to him was making him a father, and they were going to be a family.
Not for the first time he thought of bonding with her, staking his claim forever.
Notes:
Since timelines are hard to follow in Doctor Who, I'm including a note at the beginning of each major passage of time that indicates where we are in the pregnancy. It'll look *~*~*Like This*~*~* and go by weeks (with the exception of the very first and very last).
Thank you for reading and for your kudos, comments and every other encouragement! It's kept me writing, for sure.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
*~*~*Nine Days*~*~*
They lay together after love, content and sated. Rose had her head on the Doctor’s shoulder, her fingers tracing patterns on his bare chest and lightly scratching the hair there. The Doctor was looking up at the ceiling, lost in thoughts of the woman who was pressed against him, and his lips curled upwards.
Rose was going to have his baby. She hadn’t rejected the idea, and she was going to give him a child. He was going to have another crack at fatherhood, a family with Rose, and the thought was thrilling beyond any words he knew. He daydreamed, thinking of a little girl crawling into his lap and calling him ‘Daddy’, or maybe a little boy with dark hair Rose’s eyes.
He didn’t care, really. Boy or girl - he just didn't care. The woman next to him was making him a father, and they were going to be a family.
Not for the first time he thought of bonding with her, staking his claim forever.
It was the most domestic thing he’d ever contemplated, and it should have been a terrifying prospect. When he thought back, he really should have been more upset and afraid when he’d smelled her hormones and realized that she was pregnant. He should have wanted to run like hell. But he hadn’t. It hadn’t even occurred to him to run.
He had no idea why, only theories.
Rose made him happy, and that was something that he’d never thought possible for himself - especially not after the Time War. But, wasn’t it natural for him, or any sentient being, really, to gravitate towards the things that make them happy? Of course it was. It was as natural as fight-or-flight.
It didn’t completely explain why he wasn’t terrified at the prospect of being a father (because if he’s being honest, that really was a bit terrifying, no matter how much he wanted it), but he had a theory on that, too.
She would be gone someday. That was something that he couldn’t tolerate to think on; just a stray mention of it by his brain and he was struggling to contain his emotions. He knew it was the truth but - well, facing the truth didn’t mean surrendering to it.
But this baby would tie Rose to him forever. Even after she was gone, he’d have a bit of her left with him in the form of their already-beloved child. And while the fact that he’d never been a good father loomed large, he had to remind himself that he’d been miserable then, when he was a parent and on Gallifrey. He’d felt alone, isolated, an outsider. He’d never really fit in with the rest of the Time Lords and their policy of shunning emotion. He’d not loved his wife, and wasn’t sure he’d have been able to if he’d tried. Thankfully, he’d not been expected to.
He’d tried to love his children in his way, doing what he felt he could while they were young. But when they’d entered the Academy, they’d followed the societal norms he’d always been so flippant about and came to view him as an outcast, a rebel. It wasn’t until his granddaughter, Susan, came along that he let himself care, really. Susan and her love for humanity.
His time amongst the humans had changed him. The Time Lords had scorned humanity and how they let their feelings rule them. But the Doctor had always been fascinated by them. He’d learned from the humans how to use the feelings that had been so taboo with his own people, and spending time with them had given him a wisdom uncommon to the Time Lords. He observed them operate, watched them laugh and love and fight and go to war and he’d found himself much more at home on Earth than he ever had with the Time Lords.
The humans had a miserably short life span, but they knew how to live in what time they had. They lived lives, they loved their mates, they loved their families, and they let themselves feel.
It was why he’d spent so much time on Earth. Humans were very similar to the Time Lords physically, but mentally and emotionally they were completely different. Humans laughed, they loved, they fought, they meddled in each other's’ affairs. They embodied all of the qualities that he’d embodied himself, much to the Time Lords’ chagrin. The same things that had made him a rebel and left him an outcast on Gallifrey were embraced by the people of Earth. He envied them their freedom to express everything they felt at will. The silly apes were chaotic and their lives were like a roller coaster ride, but oh, what fun.
And now he had a shot at a very human life, the very thing he’d always envied. He reckoned that was why he was grabbing at it with both hands.
“Doctor?” Rose broke into his wandering thoughts.
“Hmm?”
“Penny for ‘em.”
He smiled. “You can save your penny. I’m sure you know what’s on my mind.”
“Mmm,” she said. “Probably the same thing that’s on my mind.”
“A certain unplanned pregnancy?”
“That’d be it,” she confirmed.
“Are you alright?” He brushed a tendril of hair from her face. “Really. It’s okay to tell me.”
“I’m scared. Terrified, really. But...at the same time, I’m not scared because I’m with you, and you said you’re not leaving.”
He rolled to his side to face her. “This baby... it’s unexpected and unplanned and a shock to both of us. It’s too soon and we haven’t been together long enough, I suppose. But I’m utterly devoted to you. It doesn’t matter that we’ve only been properly together for a couple of weeks. I’m not running from this.” Then he paused. “What will it take to make you see that I’m yours, completely yours?”
“Time,” she said. “Time and patience with me. Sorry I’m insecure.”
He kissed her hair. “S’alright, love. I’m afraid of you leaving me, too.”
“I’m never gonna.”
“But you... are you sure?”
“I’m sure enough to know I never want to be without you, Doctor. I’m staying for good.”
The Doctor didn’t answer her directly. She would be gone someday and he knew that, but he accepted her words for the reassurance she meant them as; she was telling him she’d never leave by choice, and that was what he wanted (and needed) to hear. He leaned forward, grazing her lips with his. “I love you, Rose.”
“I love you, too.” They lay silent for a couple of minutes, and he stroked her arm up and down with his fingertips.
“So it’ll be a couple of weeks before you can run any tests?”
“Probably. It’s too soon to get anything conclusive back just yet.”
“What are you looking for? When you test, that is.”
“The usual things, I suppose. Viability, whether the baby is human or Gallifreyan, where it’s implanted; we’ll check its growth periodically. Things like that.”
“What’s the difference between a human pregnancy and a Gallifreyan one?”
“Well,” he hesitated. “Gallifreyan gestation is the equivalent of thirteen Earth months. Approximately fifty-six weeks.”
“What!” she sat up abruptly. “You mean I’m going to be pregnant for over a year?”
He sighed and sat up beside her, studiously ignoring the fact that the sheet had fallen away from her breasts. “That’s if the baby takes on my TNA. It could be a typical human pregnancy, if the baby has DNA instead.”
“And what are the chances of that?” she demanded.
He looked sheepish. “I don’t know. Cross-species breeding was very uncommon, but not unheard of. In every case that I’m aware of, Time Lord TNA was dominant.”
Rose groaned. “Cross-species breeding. That sounds so...so…it makes me sound like a farm animal. Don’t call it breeding again, alright?” The Doctor nodded at her and she flopped back onto the bed, draping her arm over her eyes. “I’m gonna be pregnant forever.”
He lay back down beside her, propping himself on one elbow and laying his arm across her waist. “Not forever, love. It won’t be the worst thing, I promise. I’m going to take care of you.”
“Are Gallifreyan pregnancies safe for humans?”
“Should be.”
She turned head to look at him, eyes narrowed.
He hastened to reassure her. “I’m not going to let anything happen to you, Rose. I swear, I’ll keep you safe.”
She peered into the cool blue of his eyes. Finally, she sighed and put her hand against his cheek. “I know you will.”
The Doctor gathered her close, reveling in the feel of her skin against his. She nuzzled into him, making herself comfortable, and he debated whether or not to ask his next question. Finally, he caved in to the weight of his own curiosity. “Are you...happy? Even a little bit?”
“Honestly, Doctor, my head is spinning and I’m trying to wrap my mind about it. I’m not happy or unhappy about it right now, I’m just trying to process it.” He nodded and she smiled up at him. “But I have the feeling that I’m going to be very happy about it. The same gut instinct that tells me this was always in the cards for us tells me that I’m going to be ecstatic.”
Her face took on a puzzled look, as if questioning the intuition that gave her such assurance, then she gave him a mischievous grin. “You’re telling Mum, you know.”
“I’m what!?” He sat up like a shot.
“You heard me. I’m making you tell my mum.”
“Absolutely not.”
“Doctor…”
“Nothing doing, Rose, and that’s final.”
“That so, is it?”
The Doctor looked at her, saw the quirking of the corner of her mouth and eyebrow raised in challenge and cursed himself, admitting defeat. He had no idea if she was aware of his inability to tell her no, but damned if he could. He brought his free hand up to the bridge of his nose, pinching it. “She’s going to kill me.”
“Not likely.” She tugged him down until he was lying on his back and cuddled into him. “She’s fine with you now. Although she might have something to say about an alien grandbaby.”
He dragged his hand down his face, groaning.
Rose giggled. “Don’t worry, Doctor. I’ll protect you.”
“Speaking of protection,” he rolled again to face her. “Rose, we’re going to have to minimize dangerous situations for you.”
“But -”
“It’s not just you anymore, Rose. You’re carrying a wee babe. It’s snug and safe in your womb, but we can’t be taking unnecessary risks.”
“Are you saying we can’t travel?”
He shook his head. “No, we can travel for a while. If the baby is Gallifreyan, the Vortex won’t bother it at all. Even if it is human, it still shouldn’t cause any problems. Humans travel through the Vortex with no issue: look at you. Pregnant humans have never reported any ill effect from normal time travel. But eventually, we’re going to have to ground ourselves.”
“Why? I want to keep traveling.”
“Well, first and foremost, you’re exposed to things that could be harmful - not just to you, but to the babe. I won’t let you around anything potentially dangerous if I have any way to prevent it, and the TARDIS can inoculate you against things we might encounter but not have a natural immunity against. Some of the foods we’ve eaten that you tolerated before would be unsafe for a fetus, just like how in a normal human pregnancy you shouldn’t eat sushi or certain other foods. Plus,” he glanced away, then back at her, “you’re going to be pregnant, and pregnant women can’t run very fast after a certain point. Towards the end, you won’t be able to run at all.”
Rose’s eyes widened. “Oh, God, I’m going to get fat!”
“No! You’re not going to get fat, Rose. You’re going to be beautiful.” She opened her mouth to protest and he put a finger to her lips. “But I’m going to be more protective now. I don’t…” he hesitated. “I don’t know if I’ll be able to help it. I’m pretty sure it’s going to be beyond my control, the desire to keep you and the baby safe will be nearly overwhelming. My instinct is going to be to protect my offspring and my …you. I’m not going to want to leave you, nor will I be able to tolerate any situation that may cause you harm. I never have, really, but now that impulse is going to be stronger.”
“Okay,” she murmured, pouting a little.
“Will you be able to put up with me, do you think?”
“Just don’t make me stop traveling until we have to, alright?”
“Alright.”
He pulled her close again and she lay quietly against him for a few moments.
“Doctor?”
“Hmm?”
“When do you want to tell Mum and Jack?”
“Well, I thought maybe we should wait until we know more, so we’ll be able to answer any questions. We don’t even know how long before the baby comes right now.”
She nodded against his shoulder. “I think maybe we should give Mum a little time to get used to the two of us being…”
“Together? A couple?”
“Yeah,” she agreed with a smile. “Jack is going to be over the moon.”
He smiled up at the ceiling in response. “He is.”
“I’ve a feeling he’s good with kids. When they’re little, anyway.”
“Aye, I think he probably is. But as soon as he starts trying to teach the wee one how to shoot hypervodka or about the mating rituals of neohumans, he’s getting chucked from an airlock.”
“Doctor?”
“Hmm?”
“We’re going to be a family.”
“We are,” he agreed and pulled her onto him. “And in case I forget to tell you, thank you.”
“For what?”
“Loving me, having a baby with me, creating a family. I never thought I could have anything like a normal life. You’ve made it possible, Rose. You’ve made me the happiest man in all of time and space. My precious girl.”
She raised her head and kissed him, gently at first, then with a little more pressure. The Doctor grew impatient and raised his own head, capturing her mouth for a long, thorough snog. She felt his arousal against her abdomen and wriggled against it a little, teasing him. He groaned into her mouth and she smiled against his.
“You’re going to get something started, love,” he told her in a low, husky voice.
“Good.”
*~*~*Five Weeks*~*~*
They waited three weeks and three days to run the tests, and the Doctor warned it still might be too early to know anything.
Rose disagreed: her body was already telling her a gracious plenty. She had come to terms with the idea of being pregnant for the most part, but the uncomfortable aspects of early pregnancy weren’t pleasant and made it difficult for her to feel as happy as she felt she should about the impending changes.
Her breasts were incredibly tender, even sore, and the Doctor had learned quickly to avoid anything but the lightest touch. There were times she couldn’t even stand that.
She was tired, too. Exhausted. All the time. The Doctor assured her that this was normal, and encouraged her to rest as much as she felt like she needed to. She wanted him with her as often as possible, though, and he tried not to be frustrated by the inactivity.
Jack suspected something, she could tell. The three of them had been only been on four trips in three-and-a-half weeks, and those had been tame, sightseeing, adventure-less trips. The Time Agent eyed her warily when she said night after night that she just wanted to stay in and watch a film or read, then would fall asleep after only a short time. Still, if he suspected that she was pregnant he kept his thoughts to himself, saying nothing.
Finally, after nearly a month of agonizingly long days and amazing self-control on both their parts, the Doctor brought Rose into the infirmary and began the testing they’d both been waiting for.
The Doctor was entering what she called ‘clinical mode’, the same detached manner he always took on when they were in the infirmary and she was a patient. She recognized that it was a defense mechanism for him, but it didn't make her feel any better. She had a flash of him being so detached and aloof when she was pushing to give birth to their baby and felt herself shudder.
“Hey,” she said, getting his attention.
“Yeah, Rose?” He sat down in front of her, pulling her arm towards him and pushing her sleeve up.
“It’s okay to be nervous, but don’t treat me like any old patient.”
“M’not.” He drew a little blood and put it into a centrifuge to let it process.
Rose watched him, waiting for him to finish. “Just…” She hesitated over her next thought, attempting to get it out correctly. “S'just that it’s me, alright? Me and our baby.”
“I know it is, Rose.”
He had been very relaxed at the prospect of fatherhood again, comfortable to the point that it alarmed Rose a little. There was nothing more domestic than your...well, your plus-one being pregnant and starting a family. Yet the Doctor seemed to take it in stride. He actually seemed excited most of the time.
But right at this moment, as he turned around on his stool and scooted towards her with the ultrasound machine, he seemed anxious. The fact that he’d taken such a turn made her nervous as well.
“Lie back, love, and uncover your belly.” She did as instructed, and he reached over to deftly unbutton her jeans and tug them down a little in two fluid motions.
Well, I guess he has had plenty of practice lately, she thought with a light blush.
He seemed to catch her train of thought and offered her a sly grin.
“Alright, Rose,” he said, reaching for a bottle. “This may be a bit cold.”
Her abdomen flinched a bit when he squirted the blue gel on her. “Sorry.”
“S’okay.”
He reached over to the machine and pulled a wand towards him, pressing it lightly to her lower abdomen. Immediately, a black and white blur showed up on the screen. Rose couldn’t tell what any of it was - she’d only ever seen ultrasound photos from friends when they were farther along than she was - and started to ask when the Doctor narrowed his brows, then his eyes widened.
“There are two heartbeats, Rose,” he said on a rush of breath.
“Does that mean…”
“The baby is Gallifreyan. My TNA was dominant.”
Rose’s eyes teared up when she smiled, and the Doctor leaned over to kiss her. “Thank you,” he whispered.
“You’re not going to be alone anymore.”
A tear slid down his own cheek. “I wasn’t alone anymore as it was.”
She grinned back at him. “You know what I mean.”
He beamed at her, brushing the tear away and asked her, “Do you want to hear the heartsbeat?” Rose nodded and he pressed a button on the ultrasound machine.
A rapid, whooshing sound filled the room and Rose’s face bloomed. “Is that our baby?”
“Yes,” the Doctor said, his brows furrowed. “But something’s odd.”
She tensed in alarm. “What’s wrong?”
He moved the wand around a little more, sliding the wand and twisting it in various directions like he was manipulating a joystick. “I don’t know...it’s like an echo or something. I’m not sure what this means...the heartsbeat is really…” His eyes went wide and his jaw slackened.
Rose propped herself up on her elbows and looked at him, nearly shouting. “Doctor? Tell me what’s wrong?!”
When he looked back at her, his eyes were filled with tears again. “Rose...I don’t know...Oh God, Rose.”
“What’s wrong, Doctor!?”
“There are four heartbeats. Two gestational sacs.” He pointed to the screen, showing her two black voids in a sea of grey that each held a little speck of grey.
Rose blinked. “Two gestational…”
“Sacs. They’re what hold the baby, where the baby grows.” He looked back at the screen and almost whispered, “and four heartbeats, Rose.”
The penny dropped and her eyes got huge. “Doctor...does that mean…?”
“There are two babies in there, Rose.” He looked at her, his eyes huge and round. “We’re having twins.”
Notes:
Surprise!
tenroseforeverandever is a saint, y'all. I could never have dreamed of a better beta.
Also, I just realized Rose is on her back this entire chapter. Umm....sorry?
I made a detailed outline this past weekend; unless I split some chapters (which may happen) it's looking like this fic is going to top out around 26 chapters. It's certainly going to be the longest fic I've ever written!
Chapter 8: Morning Sickness
Summary:
He lay back in the bed (their bed, he thought happily), and stared up at the canopy with his head resting on his interlaced fingers. He thought of the days just after the Time War when he drank himself into oblivion, and the time he’d tried to take himself out of this life. The Doctor wondered - not for the first time - if his old girl had taken him to Rose and the autons on purpose.
Notes:
This is a bit of a lengthy one, folks. An event from "Healing" is referenced in this chapter.
I have the best readers in the world. Thank you so much for your attention to this fic. Your comments feed the muse.
Scads of credit again go to tenroseforeverandever, who keeps me in check. :)
Chapter Text
*~*~*Five-and-a-Half Weeks*~*~*
The TARDIS phone was ringing, and the Doctor tilted his head to consider it. The only two people who ever called that phone, who would ever have reason to, were asleep. It shouldn’t be ringing. But it was, and he supposed he should answer it.
“Hullo, this is the Doctor speaking.”
“Doctor? S’me, Jackie.”
“Hullo, Jackie. Rose is asleep at the moment.”
“Didn’t want to talk to her just yet, wanted to talk to you.”
The Doctor raised his eyebrows. “Me?”
“Yes, you. Are you lot still coming here for my birthday?”
“Yes, we’re planning on getting there the day before and staying until the day after.”
“Good. I think you and I should sit down and talk while you’re here.”
The Doctor’s brow furrowed and he sent a mental message to the TARDIS. Getting a response, he asked Jackie, “Would it ease your mind to talk to me now?”
“I don’t want to talk over the phone.”
“No, I suspect you don’t. I can be there in ten seconds if you’d like. We can talk while Rose sleeps.”
“Alright, go on then.”
The Doctor walked over to the console and flipped a couple of switches. “Clear a spot in the lounge, I’m landing there. See you soon.” He rang off and flipped the last switch, starting the materialization sequence.
~*~O~*~
“D’ya bring me any of that tea?”
The Doctor fought back a grin at the lack of greeting and bossy tone. Stepping out of the TARDIS into the lounge, he answered her. “I don’t know what tea you’re talking about.”
“Whatever it was you got me at Christmas last month. Bee-don tea or summat?”
“Beadonian,” the Doctor corrected. “No, but I can make sure you get some for your birthday, if you like.”
“Yeah, do,” Jackie said, then gestured for him to follow her into the kitchen. “Have a seat, I’ll fix you a cuppa.”
“Ta,” the Doctor said, tugging off his jacket and sitting at the table. He repeated his thanks when she sat a mug of tea down then sat across from him.
“Doctor, I know you think I’m just a stupid, single mum.”
“I don’t think you’re stupid,” he interrupted.
Jackie continued, ignoring him. “But I always tried to be a good mum to Rose, even if it was just me. I couldn’t give her the best of everythin’, but I always did the best I could.”
“I’m sure that you did.”
“I like to think I didn’t do too bad a job, bein’ on my own.”
“You did a fine job,” the Doctor answered carefully. “Rose is wonderful.”
“But I always had to be mother and father to her, since Pete wasn’t around to take care of the dad things. So here I am, again, doing what he’d have done if he’d not run out in front of that bleedin’ car.” The Doctor nodded, and Jackie went on. “Pete... well, it would have been his job to ask you what your intentions are with our daughter, so I reckon that’s what I’m doin'.”
“Excuse me?” the Doctor said, thoroughly nonplussed.
“What are your intentions with my Rose?”
The Doctor just gaped at her, struggling to gather his thoughts.
She didn’t give him a chance to respond, anyway. “Rose says you gave her a necklace with the key to the TARDIS on it, and told her that that box was her home. She’s under the impression that you want her to stay with you forever.”
“Good,” he declared.
“So that’s true, then?”
“Yes. I do.”
“So you’re not gonna be gettin' bored with her and sendin' her home?”
The Doctor scoffed. “Bored with Rose? Hardly. And no, I’m keeping her with me as long as she’ll stay. I want her with me always.”
“You love her?”
The Doctor nodded. “I do.”
Jackie leaned forward, putting her elbows on the table. “Do you really, Doctor? You’re not human, you know. Are you even capable of loving someone? Are your emotions like ours? Does that word mean somethin' different for you?” The Doctor opened his mouth to speak and Jackie spoke over him: “I’m just worried about my daughter, Doctor. Thinks you hung the moon, she does. If you had children, you’d understand. I think.”
The Doctor chuckled to himself. If she only knew... He could just imagine the look on Jackie's face if was to just announce that he HAD been a father once already, never mind that he was about to become a father once again, with her grandchildren. Tempting as it was to divulge his and Rose's secret, he bit back the words that sprung to his lips. Now was not the time.
“I know I’m not human and that worries you, Jackie, but I assure you, I’m capable of the same emotions with all the same names. When I tell you I love Rose, I know what I’m saying and feeling. And I do love Rose, just as she loves me.”
“Good, because she really does love you, Doctor. I’d hoped it was just an infatuation with an older bloke...er, alien...but s’not. S’more than that. I need to know that it’s not just an infatuation with a younger woman - I guess alien to you - on your part.”
The Doctor shook his head. “No, it’s not. It’s much more than that. She’s more important to me than any other being in all of time and space, Rose is.”
“Are you goin' to marry her?” Jackie challenged, her eyes narrowed, her gaze not leaving the Doctor.
“Hadn’t thought about it,” he lied. “My people did things much differently. Marriages weren’t marriages as you understand them. There wasn’t any love involved. It was all political - alliances, if you will.” At least that much is true, he thought.
“What? No one married for love?” she asked, curious.
“Not really. It's hard to explain,” he said, not wanting to discuss the mating and bonding history of Gallifrey with Rose’s mum. “Why? Do you want us to be married?”
“I just want my little girl to be happy,” Jackie asserted.
“So do I.”
She held up her hand to stop him when he started to speak. “I know you’ve been nothin’ but good to her. Even if I don’t agree with you draggin’ her all over the universe and gettin’ into scrapes, I can see how much she means to you. You treat her like a diamond set in spun glass. But her heart’ll break like spun glass if you ever try to send her home again. If you’re goin’ to keep her with you, then I’m pleased. Well, not really, because I miss her, but Rose loves you, Doctor, and you need to love her back - all or nothin’.”
The Doctor nodded, considering his words, then slid his teacup out of his way and crossed his legs. “Jackie, everyone has priorities in their life, and I’m no different. I’m also a selfish bastard. The two top priorities in my life are keeping Rose happy and keeping Rose safe. It doesn’t matter to me where in space and time we are, those are the two things that matter most to me. Most of the rows we’ve ever had have been because she wandered off where I couldn’t see her and I didn’t know where she was. We’ll be coming here to see you every couple of weeks because it makes her happy. Almost all of the places we go are places I think she’d enjoy visiting. There are a million things I’m responsible for and trillions more I’m responsible to, but the most important of all of these is Rose. She trumps them all. There’s no question.”
Jackie nodded, apparently satisfied, but the Doctor wasn’t. Not yet. “I’m never sending her back unless I have no other choice and it comes down to keeping her safe.” Or the babies’, he thought to himself. “She’s not a notch in my belt. Rose keeps me together, and I want her with me. Always. I love her.”
“Good,” Jackie said. “That’s exactly what I wanted to hear. Now how ‘bout another cuppa, yeah?”
*~*~*Six Weeks*~*~*
The Doctor put the sonic in his pocket, the minor repair he’d been working on finally finished. Nothing major, mind, just killing time while Rose slept. He sent a question to the TARDIS and got a prompt reply: Rose was still asleep, nearing the end of her sleep cycle and about to wake. Finally, he thought. She’d been asleep and he’d been alone for hours. He set the console’s controls to allow the TARDIS to float aimlessly for a while, then went to join Rose.
The TARDIS had immediately accepted the change in their relationship, modifying Rose’s room to something of a suite. In addition to her large bedroom, the TARDIS had attached a sitting room/lounge area for the two of them to use when they wanted some time alone. On the mantle of the fireplace in her new sitting room was the teal-and-gold bowl he’d given her in Kyoto almost two months ago. To him, it seemed to underline that the two of them had merged. His room was still there, same as it always had been, and he often got dressed there or showered in his own ensuite. But the TARDIS had provided a drawer in Rose’s room with pajama pants and vests.
He nudged open the door, peeking in at her. Her blonde hair was splayed wildly over her pillowcase, and she’d pulled the pillow he slept on over to herself, wrapping it in her arms. Rose had taken to wearing his jumpers, snatching them from the floor or footboard or chair (wherever he’d thrown it earlier in the evening, in a tearing hurry to have nothing between them) when they retired to sleep. He didn’t mind in the least: the wool of his jumper felt much better against his skin when it was on her.
He smiled contentedly, then closed the door behind him and started across the room towards the oasis of his Rose in the bed they’d been sharing. He stripped off his jacket, tossing it onto the chair beside their bed. He toed off his boots and stripped off his clothes, down to his pants, then slipped into bed beside her.
She stirred when the bed dipped under his weight, and he took advantage of her movement to tug his pillow away from her and shove it under his head. Before she could even crease her brow he put his arm around her, pulling her close and sighing contentedly when she seemed to decide that he would make a good substitute for his pillow. The Doctor drew on her bare arm with his fingertips, realizing only after he was done that he was writing their names.
“Mmm…” Rose stretched against him, and turned her face up to his, smiling a little. “Morning,” she murmured.
“Morning, love,” he answered.
“‘Time is it?” she asked blearily. “Are we in the vortex?”
“Aye,” he answered. “You can sleep a bit more if you’d like, have a lie-in. We’ve nowhere to be, and I’ll stay with you.”
“No, s’okay,” she answered, stretching again. “Although I’d like it if you’d stay with me.” Her tongue appeared between her teeth.
He smiled, his genuine smile, and bent his head to kiss her. She kept her lips closed tight, then pulled away from him. “Sorry... it’s morning.”
“So?”
“So I need to brush my teeth and go to the loo.”
He huffed. “Rubbish human biology. Time Lords don’t have to brush their teeth, not unless they just want to.”
“Well, I rather like the feeling of clean, minty teeth.” She poked him in the side making him yelp. “And mind yourself with the ‘rubbish human biology’ talk, Mister. This human is carrying your children with her rubbish biology.”
The Doctor’s face bloomed at the reminder, utterly pleased. “I know. My human is brilliant and anything but rubbish.” He bent to kiss her again, and she pushed at his chest, grinning.
“Your human really needs to pee and brush her teeth.”
He laughed. “Go on, then. I’ll be here when you’re done.”
She favored him with a quick peck to the lips and threw off the covers, nearly bouncing from the bed to the loo. The Doctor watched her go, appreciating the sight of her with hair that he’d thoroughly mussed before sleep had a chance to and his jumper skirting the middle of her thighs. He found himself trying to ignore the twitch in his pants. Rose turned back to him when she got to the loo, giving him a coy smile that he returned, then closed the door behind herself.
He lay back in the bed (their bed, he thought happily), and stared up at the canopy with his head resting on his interlaced fingers. He thought of the days just after the Time War when he drank himself into oblivion, and the time he’d tried to take himself out of this life. The Doctor wondered - not for the first time - if his old girl had taken him to Rose and the autons on purpose. The TARDIS had thrown him into the zero room and refused to let him out until he agreed to actually live his life, not just go on and hunt for ways to burn through his regenerations. He’d been in the zero room for three months.
Those three months had led to the most exciting, unbelievable year of his life. In just a little over a year, he had met the most incredible woman he’d ever known, the two of them had fallen in love, and now they were starting a family together.
It was quick, to be sure, but perfect. He really couldn’t be any -
A loud, retching sound came from the en suite, and the Doctor sat up like a shot. “Rose?” he called out. “Are you alright?”
His only answer was something that sounded like a sob, followed by another heaving, retching sound. He threw the covers off his legs and ran to the en suite, throwing the door open and assessing the situation.
Rose was on her knees in front of the toilet in the small loo off the larger, luxurious bathroom, bent over and throwing up. He rushed to her but she shooed him away with a forceful wave of her hand, her head hanging over the toilet, still retching.
He stood and watched her helplessly, guilt washing over him. He had done this to her, he was the one making her sick. If he had only thought that there was a slight possibility that she could get pregnant, he would never have -
“Stop it,” she said in a weak voice.
She sat back on her heels, lying one arm across the seat of the toilet and resting her head on it, looking at him.
“Rose, I’m so sor-”
“I said ‘stop it’, Doctor.”
He stopped talking and just stared at her.
“S’not your fault.” Her voice was still weak, but she tried to smile. “You didn’t know-”
Her words were interrupted by another heave of her stomach, and she turned her face into the toilet. The Doctor’s own stomach contracted in sympathy, but he mastered his body - as his superior biology allowed him to do. Poor Rose. She may be a glorious, wonderful human, but her biology really was rubbish. And, despite Rose’s assertions, he’d done this to her.
He shook his head, reminding himself that Rose had insisted he stop with the guilt. It wasn’t possible, he knew, but he could try. For her. She was going through this for him and his children, he could certainly try to do as she asked.
After what seemed an embarrassingly long time, it occurred to him to help her. Not wasting another second, he went to the linen closet, pulled out a flannel, and wet it with cool water. He folded the cloth into a long rectangle. After Rose had flushed the toilet and slumped to a sitting position, he approached her. Crouching down, he lay the cool cloth on her head.
“Mmm. Feels good. Thank you, Doctor.”
“Rose, I really am sorry.”
“I know that, Doctor.”
“I can make it better,” he said. “The TARDIS has some anti-nausea medication that’s safe for humans and Time Lords, both. I can give you some, if you want.”
She nodded weakly and he sent a plea to the TARDIS. When he turned around, there was a small glass of water and a little pill on the counter.
“Put this under your tongue,” he instructed. “Let it dissolve, and in a few seconds take a few sips of water. You should feel better in less than a minute. It doesn’t taste bad. A bit minty, like you like.”
She obeyed, turning her body to lean against the wall by the toilet. He turned his own body to sit beside her, putting an arm around her shoulders. She leaned into him, laying her head on his chest.
“Thank you.”
“You don’t have to thank me, Rose. But you’re welcome anyway.” He stroked her hair while he waited for the medicine to kick in. When exactly sixty seconds had passed, he asked, “How do you feel now, love?”
“A bit better. Ta.” She offered him a weak smile.
“What happened? You seemed to feel fine when you first got up.” He thought of that tongue-touched smile she had offered him before disappearing into the ensuite.
“I did feel fine. I used the loo, then stepped out into the bathroom to brush my teeth. I felt queasy as soon as I started brushing, and the next thing I knew I was back in here, sick.”
He turned his head and planted a kiss to the top of her head. “I’m sorry, love.”
“S’not your fault, Doctor. Really. And you were able to make me better, yeah?” He nodded and she sighed. “I don’t feel sick anymore,” she announced. “But I do feel disgusting.”
“Why don’t you rinse your mouth out while I run you a bath?”
“Will you join me?” she asked, with a pitiful little smile.
“Do you want me to?”
“Yes.” The answer was quick and decisive.
“Then I’ll join you. Go now, rinse your mouth to get that taste out, and I’ll draw a bath for us. Bubbles or no?”
“Yes, please. The apple-scented ones.”
“Your wish is my command.”
~*~O~*~
Rose was reclined against him in the water, her head lolling back on his shoulder, her cheek against his. She’d pulled her hair into a loose, messy bun to keep it out of the water, and the blonde strands tickled his ear. The frothy bubbles nearly covered her shoulders. She’d complained bitterly that the water wasn’t hot enough, but the Doctor had explained to her that humans could only allow their body heat to rise to a certain point before they risked damage to a developing baby. When she was farther along, he told her, she could have the water as hot as she liked it. What he didn’t tell her was that by that time, she likely wouldn’t want the water so hot anymore.
In the meantime, in the as-warm-as-was-safe water with Rose sitting naked between his legs and reclining against his bare chest, he was having a much harder time controlling his biology than usual. Rose stirred, settling herself more firmly against his torso and he knew she felt him in the small of her back. Her cheek tightened in a smile against his and he heard her chuckle.
“Don’t mind me,” he said, still fighting an internal battle with the part of his anatomy that definitely wanted to be minded. “You just relax.”
“I don’t mind at all, Doctor. S’flatterin’.” He had noticed before that her accent grew thicker when she was tired, and he found it endearing. “I love you. I know I say it a lot, but....well, I just want you to know. T’always know.”
He kissed her temple. “I know, Rose. I love you, too.”
“Thank you for takin' care o’ me.”
“It’s my pleasure. In sickness and in health, yeah?”
She snorted a little. “Those’re vows we’ve not made anywhere.”
“D’you really think I haven’t, Rose?” he asked quietly. She went still against him, and he decided to go on, introducing a change of subject that wasn’t really a change of subject at all. It served the dual purpose of taking care of the protrusion against her back. “I talked with your mum.”
“Huh? Why?” She sat away from him a bit, turning her head to face him. “When?”
“Few days ago. I thought maybe she had told you.”
“Why’d you do that? We’re going there for her birthday, I thought.”
“She called and wanted to talk to me. I went by there while you were asleep.”
Rose studied him for a second, speculative, then settled back against him as she had been. The Doctor refrained from sighing with relief when she did.
“What did she want?”
“She wanted to talk about you. Specifically, she wanted to know what my intentions were towards you.”
Rose didn’t answer for a few seconds, and he waited her out. She’d ask.
“What’d you tell her?”
“I told her part of the truth. Not that we’re pregnant, mind, but I didn’t lie to her. I’d like to tell you the whole truth, though.”
“Go on, then.”
“I want to marry you.”
Rose froze in his arms, then laughed. “Yeah, sorry,” she said, shaking her head. “I thought you said you wanted t’marry me.”
“I do.”
“Go on, then. Pull the other one.”
“M’not kidding, Rose.”
She raised up and turned to look at him. “Are you serious?”
“‘Course I am!” he said, narrowing his eyes at her disbelief.
“But Doctor…you? Married?”
“Oi! What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I just never saw you as the type to settle down.”
“Well, you saw wrong.” She didn’t say anything for a while, and he asked, “Problem?”, raising an eyebrow and grinning a little.
“I just can’t believe you’re being serious.”
“I am. I want to marry you at some point. I’d marry you today, but I know we need some time together before we take that step.”
She sat back against him again, as if his last statement had validated her thought process. “Doctor, I’m already yours. We live together, we sleep together, I’m pregnant with your babies. You don’t have to make such a noble gesture.”
“S’not a gesture!” he protested. “S’not that at all. I’d want this even if we weren’t pregnant.”
“D’you decide this with my mum? Did she put you up to this?”
The Doctor snorted. “‘Course not. I want to marry you because I want to marry you.”
She was silent for a second, then asked in a quiet voice, “Why?”
He considered his answer for a minute, wanting to phrase it exactly right. “We live together now, and I don't just mean that we both live on the TARDIS. She’s all but moved me into your room. Have you noticed?” Rose nodded against his shoulder and he went on. “We sleep together every night. And in the mornings. And sometimes in the mid-afternoon…and then that one time while we were making dinner, in the galley...” Rose giggled and he kissed her on the cheek, delighted by the sound. “So I know you’re mine. You know I’m yours. We’re together, properly. But I want everyone else to know.”
“You think they don’t?” she asked with no hint of sarcasm. “I mean, we hold hands everywhere we go, and you’re not exactly shy about snogging me, unless we’re at Mum’s.”
“Well, yes, you’re right, of course,” he said, “but I don’t want to keep it to myself in London, either. There are places - quite a lot of places, actually - where it’s illegal for me to touch you without the two of us being married. Remember Eretnip? Not long after we started travelling together, we went there. It was the place with the green gemstones in all the rocks.”
“I remember.”
“If I had held your hand or shown you any affection there, you’d have been thrown in jail as a prostitute. A man and woman showing affection towards one another is considered inappropriate, unless that couple is married. Besides, isn’t it culturally appropriate for human adults to be married when they’re expecting children? ”
“It used to be, but not so much anymore.”
“It was for the Time Lords. It was simply unheard of for unbound couples to produce offspring.”
“Bound?”
“Binding is the Time Lord equivalent of marriage.”
She paused a moment, considering. “So you want to marry me for my own protection and the protection of my reputation?” He could almost hear her tongue touching her teeth.
“No, this doesn’t have anything to do with the pregnancy. Not really. Just want to be married to you, me.”
“But, Doctor, what’s to stop us from just telling people we’re married if it becomes a problem?”
“Well...” he hesitated for a moment and she nudged him.
“Well, what?”
“The Time Lords were a very legalistic people. Very rigid, very much by-the-book. You know that I was never one for following the rules, especially the Time Lords’ rules. I’m still not. If you don’t want to marry me or be bound to me, we won’t. We’ll just tell people we are, if it comes to it. But... well, maybe it's a carryover from the Time Lords, but I’d like you and I to be legally bound. Unassailable on any planet, in any time.”
“Doctor, are you proposing to me?”
“No. Not yet. I’m just making my intentions known.”
Rose pulled herself away from him a little, spinning in his arms and putting her arms around his neck. He tightened his own arms around her waist and pulled her against him, not apologizing this time for the rapidly-growing erection making itself known between their two bellies. Her eyes flicked from his eyes to her lips, then back up to his eyes while a small smile played at the corners of her mouth.
“Tell me your intentions again.”
“Rose Tyler, I intend to make you my wife. On every planet, in every time. I want you to be mine in every sense of the word, and I plan to do what I need to do to make that happen. I’m going to stake an unquestionable claim on you so that everyone we encounter, anywhere and everywhere, knows you’re mine.”
“I like that idea,” she murmured, her lips almost touching his.
“Yeah?” he asked, smiling, almost shy.
She nodded, then kissed him through her own smile. The kiss didn’t take long to heat up, and the Doctor tightened his arms around her, pulling her heated skin flush against his. His hands drifted, and one slid down her back to cup her bum while the other threaded wet fingers through her dry hair. He ground himself against her a little while his tongue explored, claiming her mouth as his. She carded her fingers through his short hair, and he hummed into the kiss.
Rose brought her hand up to his cheek, gentling the kiss before pulling away, bussing his cheeks then his lips to soften the loss. He looked at her through a hazy fog of desire; his hearts full of love, his eyes full of her, and told himself he was the luckiest bastard that had ever drawn breath.
“You’re mine, too, you know that?”
“I’ve known that since ‘There’s me.’ You’re the one just figuring it out.”
She planted her lips on his again in a brief, chaste kiss, then hugged him.
He held her tight to him, his whole universe in his arms, and closed his eyes. “Thank you,” he whispered.
“For what?” she said, just as quietly.
“Loving me, healing me, making me whole. You’re the gold that put me back together.”
“I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
Chapter 9: Telling Jack
Summary:
“Are you going to marry her?” Jack asked.
“Huh?”
“Rose. Are you going to marry her?”
“I hadn’t thought about it,” he denied.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
*~*~*Seven Weeks*~*~*
Rose was spending a lot of time in bed lately, both with and without the Doctor. They spent a large part of the time resting: sleeping, reading, talking, or just being together, and the other part of the time they were engaging in other activities that were anything but quiet and restful. But the Doctor was concerned about her and the fact that she was so fatigued lately. She didn’t have the energy to fight him when he insisted that she relax whenever she seemed tired. He would stay with her, holding her close, until she fell asleep, then either read or get up to tinker on his TARDIS, but almost always returned to be there when she woke.
In the still of the night the two of them spoke in whispered debates about how to tell Jack and Jackie, the two closest people in their lives, about the pregnancy. They’d planned early on to tell their friend (who Rose insisted on referring to as ‘Uncle Jack’, bringing about pursed lips from the Doctor) before Jackie. The Doctor wanted an ally in keeping Rose safe, and Rose insisted that Jack would figure out what was going on soon, if he hadn’t already. They decided to stick to Rose’s suggestion to let Jackie get a bit more used to the two of them as a couple before they sprung the knowledge on her that she was to be a grandmother twice over.
Finally, two weeks after learning that they were pregnant with twins, they came to the conclusion that they couldn’t keep it from Jack any longer and agreed to tell him the next morning.
~*~O~*~
The Doctor was the first one up, as always, and set about his frequent habit of making breakfast for the three of them. He was humming a jaunty tune, just about to pour the first batch of pancake batter into the waffle iron, when Jack wandered in yawning broadly.
“Morning, Doc.”
The Doctor didn’t even bother telling Jack not to call him Doc. It didn’t matter today. “Morning, Jack.” He went back to whistling.
Jack sat at the table and sighed, propping his feet up with a smile. “I love being right.”
“What are you on about?”
“You and Rose. Since you two got your heads out of your asses and started doing the horizontal mambo, you’ve been much less of a grumpy bastard.”
The Doctor normally would have wheeled on him with a sharp retort, but not this time. This morning, nothing was going to sour his mood. Instead, he just chuckled . “I don’t know that I would call it the ‘horizontal mambo’.”
Jack crossed his arms behind his head. “Doesn’t matter what you call it. Now that the two of you are sleeping together, you’re much more pleasant to be around.”
“It's much more pleasant for us, too,” Rose said as she breezed in. She gave Jack a saucy grin and crossed to the Doctor, standing on tiptoe to kiss him. “Morning, Doctor.” He smiled and greeted her, then turned back to the cooker. She went to the fridge to get some juice, grazing her hand across his bum as she went.
“Oh, I just bet it is.” Jack waggled his eyebrows. “Just throwin’ it out there: if you two ever get bored and want to spice things up -”
“No, Jack.” The Doctor’s voice was firm and Rose giggled.
Jack shrugged. “Can’t blame a guy for trying.”
The Doctor muttered something and Rose sat down with her glass of orange juice. “What would you two like to do today?” she asked.
The Doctor answered before Jack could suggest something potentially dangerous. “Thought we might go to Barcelona. The planet, not the city. Spend a couple of days, then perhaps pay a visit to Jackie.” Rose raised an eyebrow at him and Jack did the same. The Doctor paid them no mind, flipping waffles onto plates.
“You are suggesting we pay a visit to Jackie?”
“I am,” the Doctor said, unconcerned. “In a couple of days, mind.”
“Why Barcelona?” Jack asked.
The Doctor shrugged, pulling out glazed strawberries and a banana. “It’s a fun place. Lots to do, beautiful beaches, friendly people, dogs with no noses. Imagine how many times you get to tell that joke!”
“Hmm,” Jack mused. “Maybe that’s a good idea, after all. I could stand some time with, er, friendly people.”
Rose tittered and the Doctor rolled his eyes, bringing the plates to the table. “Behave, Harkness.”
“What? Why should you get all the action?”
“Rose is not action.” Rose put her tongue out at Jack and the Doctor chuckled as sat Rose’s plate down in front of her. He was just opening his mouth to say something when he saw Rose’s face fall. “Rose? What is it?”
She pointed to the strawberry compote on top of her golden waffle. “It’s just... I can’t…” She got up and ran from the room, her hand over her mouth.
The Doctor scrubbed his face with his hands, and Jack stared after her. “Is she alright?”
“Upset stomach. Go ahead and eat, she may be a while.”
“Doctor,” Jack said. “What’s going on?”
He knew the gig was up. “Eat, Jack. Let me go check on Rose, and then we’ll talk when I get back.”
The Doctor poured a glass of water, then he strode to the door of the galley. “I’ll be back soon, and I’ll tell you everything.”
Jack eyed him suspiciously. “Yeah. You do that.”
~*~O~*~
He came back fifteen minutes later when Jack was just putting cream and sugar in a cup of coffee. “Want one?” he offered.
“No, ta,” the Doctor answered, then plonked down at the table.
“So go ahead,” Jack said as he sat. “Tell me about how Rosie is pregnant.”
The Doctor shot him a look. “How long have you known?”
“A while, I suppose. We weren’t doing anything particularly adventurous, and Rose was tired all the time anyway.”
The Doctor grinned. “Aye, she’s pregnant.”
“You’re happy about this?”
“I’m ecstatic, Jack. This is fantastic news!”
“Two months ago you were bleating that you’d never be able to have her, that it was never going to be you.”
“Yeah, I know. It’s sudden, and no mistake.”
“What does Rose say about the baby?”
“Babies. Plural. There are two.”
“You’re shitting me.”
“Nope.” The Doctor beamed.
Jack leaned back in his chair and looked at the Doctor, wide-eyed. “Well I’ll be damned.”
“Probably,” the Doctor quipped.
“What does Rose think about it?”
“She’s nervous, but happy. We both are.”
“She’s only twenty-one, Doc.”
“You think I don’t know that?” he replied with a hint of steel in his voice. “Besides, six weeks ago when I was saying it would never happen, you were telling me age was just a number.”
Jack look chastened. “True.” His voice took on a hard edge of his own. “You’re not leaving her, are you, Doc?”
The Doctor jerked his head up. “What? Hell no! How could you even ask such a thing?”
“I’m just making sure,” Jack stated in a matter-of-fact tone . “You know how I feel about Rose. I’d do anything to protect her, and if you’re going to bail, then I’m going to take her and run… Now, before things go any farther.”
“Don’t you dare,” the Doctor snarled.
“Don’t worry. There’s no reason to... for now. She’s happy and in love. I wouldn’t dare mess with that.” His voice deepened just a little, “But it’s worth you knowing that I’ll defend her at all costs. I’ve died for her once already. I’ll do it over and over again, if I have to. And now that protection extends to those babies.”
The Doctor nodded. He didn’t look at Jack but his hearts swelled. Knowing that Rose and the babies would be safe and loved, no matter what, was warming.
“So what are you going to do?” Jack asked, all of the warning tone gone from his voice.
“Well, we’ll have to avoid getting thrown in jail or kidnapped for a while.”
“That’s not what I meant. What are you going to do about Rose and the babies?”
“I’m not sure. We thought there was only one until recently.”
“Are you going to marry her?”
“Huh?”
“Rose. Are you going to marry her?”
“I hadn’t thought about it,” he denied.
Jack called him on it with a grin. “You lie.”
The Doctor didn’t bother to answer or acknowledge him. His thought process changed and he leaned forward, putting his elbows on the table. “Look, Jack, there are some things you should probably know up front.”
Jack brought his hands up and rubbed his face. “Yeah, I figured you would be dropping me off.”
The Doctor looked confused. “Why would we do that?”
“Third wheel and all that. Fifth wheel, I suppose.”
“No, no, no. I actually was going to talk to you about what it’s going to be like - assuming you’re staying.”
“I don’t plan on going anywhere.”
“Good. Rose would miss you terribly.” The Doctor rolled his eyes at Jack’s raised eyebrow. “Oh, stop fishing for compliments.”
The Time Agent barked a little laugh, and the Doctor smiled.
“Right. So, here’s the pertinent information. The babies are Gallifreyan, meaning that the pregnancy will be longer and harder on her than a normal human pregnancy. Adding in the fact that it’s twins, it’s going to be even harder than that.”
The Doctor was surprised when the other man didn’t make a comment about him using the words ‘longer and harder’. “Is she going to be safe?” Jack asked.
“That’s why I’m talking to you. Some things around here are going to have to change in order to protect her and the babies.”
“No problem. Name them.”
“Well,” he began, “like I said, we’ll be avoiding trouble as much as possible. It’s imperative that we keep her safe.”
“Gotcha. What else?”
“She’s going to be pregnant for quite a while. A little over a year, actually.”
“Oh wow.”
“Yeah,” the Doctor agreed. “And...well...we’re going to have to be grounded for a good part of that time.”
“Go on.”
“She and I haven’t talked about it much, but I’m going to be parking the TARDIS about the time her movement is restricted. When she can’t run anymore, we’re going linear.”
“Fair enough.”
“You don’t have to come with us. We can come get you after the babies are born, a week or so after we drop you off,” the Doctor offered.
“Not happening,” Jack said simply. “I’d rather be there when the kiddos are born.”
“Good, because I may need you.”
Jack nodded. “Will she be in danger?”
“I don’t know. I honestly don’t. I feel like it’s only fair to tell you this, though…” He sighed, as if whatever he was about to say needed to be dragged out of him. “I’m likely to be experiencing some… changes, too. I’ll probably be even more protective and - possessive - of her in the next year. From what I remember from physiology classes at the academy, the hormones secreted during a Gallifreyan pregnancy are going to trigger that response in me. We’re hard-wired to protect our mates and offspring. It’s a throwback to more primal times. But,” he paused for a second, “when you figure that I’m the last of my kind…”
“It’s likely to be even more intense.”
“Yeah.”
Jack nodded. “Alright, noted. But don’t think that gives you licence to be an asshole all the time,” he warned.
“I don’t intend to be,” the Doctor grinned.
“So when are you planning on parking this thing?”
The Doctor swallowed his sip of tea. “I don’t know. In a regular human pregnancy, she’d start getting...unwieldy at around twenty weeks. With a Gallifreyan pregnancy it’s more like thirty weeks. I don’t know what it’ll mean when she’s human, the babies are Gallifreyan and there are two of them.”
“Man,” Jack blew out a breath and smiled broadly. “Twins. That’s something, Doc.”
The Doctor smiled happily, then his expression darkened and he fixed Jack with a glare. “Are you sure that you’ll be willing to settle down for several months? Because once we land and Rose is grounded, I’m not going to be willing to leave and take you somewhere.”
The American snorted. “You’re actually asking me if I’m going to be okay being in one place for several months? You?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“For Mr. Anti-Domestics, you certainly are taking to this well.”
The Doctor had the grace to flush. “Rose told you about that, huh?”
“Yeah.”
“When I took her on, I think I knew that she would automatically make the place more home-y just by her mere presence, but I didn’t realize how much. The longer she was around, the more my life felt… well, domestic. And I realized that I liked it that way.” He shrugged, then stood up and went for a cup of tea. “I never had any intention of falling in love and starting a family. It is the exact opposite of what a Time Lord is supposed to do. We’re supposed to avoid emotions and emotional attachments at all costs. We even loom our children. Womb-born children hadn’t existed on Gallifrey for centuries before I was born, and love matches were taboo and nearly unheard of.” He grinned as he returned with his tea and sat down. “Always a bit of a renegade, me.”
“Doc,” Jack said, leaning forward. “This is going to put a damper on you in a major way. You know that, right?”
“‘Course I do.”
“You won’t be able to entertain your wanderlust the way you usually do.”
“I’m aware of that, too.”
“Are you sure you’ll be able to go months and years without doing something… well… Doctorish?”
“Oi! What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Oh come on,” Jack said, frustrated. “You’re an adrenaline junkie. Are you really going to be able to give that up?”
The Doctor looked down at his mug and stared at it absently for a moment. Jack could see that he was weighing his words and didn’t say anything, letting him have whatever time he needed.
“For Rose, I’d give up anything and everything, Jack.”
“Good.”
Notes:
This chapter was not my favorite, but a necessary one.
I know that up until now, this story has been fluffier than cotton candy, but just as none of our lives are happy all the time, neither is the Doctor and Rose's. There's an angsty little interlude coming up soon.
Chapter 10: School Reunion
Summary:
Team TARDIS runs into an old friend of the Doctor's when Mickey calls them home to investigate a local high school.
Notes:
All recognizable quotes are from the episode "School Reunion."
Long chapter, but hopefully you'll like it!
As always, the world's biggest thanks to tenroseforeverandever for the amazing beta job!!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
*~*~*Eight Weeks*~*~*
Rose stepped out of the TARDIS into the sunlight, looking up towards her mum’s building. She heard feet landing on the pavement behind her, and Jack stepped up beside her. Two more footfalls sounded, and she felt the Doctor’s arm slip around her waist.
“Ready?” he asked.
She nodded, smiling up at him.
“Let’s go!” Jack said, clapping his hands together. “Mickey Mouse will be thrilled to see me, let’s not keep him waiting!”
Rose rolled her eyes with a grin, stepping away from the Doctor and taking his hand. “C’mon. Let’s go see about this alien invasion.”
The Doctor followed the tug of her hand. “S’probably just people acting normally and Rickey the Idiot doesn’t know how to cope.”
“Be nice,” she admonished over the sound of Jack’s snorting laughter. She released his hand and started up the stairs.
“Do I have to?”
“Yes.”
“But I don’t want to be chummy with a bloke you used to snog.” Rose knew that if she pointed out his tone, the Doctor would argue that Time Lords didn’t whine. Pouting didn't seem to be off the table, however.
“Don’t have to be chummy, you plum.” She turned on the landing to face him. “But I’m with you, not him -”
“Too right you are,” he muttered. “Even if he doesn’t bloody know it.”
“He knows I fancy you,” Rose said reasonably, turning back to climb the next flight of stairs. “The least you can do is be a gracious winner.”
“You fancy me?”
“‘Course I fancy you, Doctor.” She smirked down at him over the railing with her tongue in her teeth. “You’re terribly fit.”
He rolled his eyes at her but couldn’t hide a chuffed smile and she grinned, turning back to the climb of the steps. “Just be a good sport, Doctor, yeah?”
“Yeah, Doc,” Jack piped up from a few steps behind the Doctor. “Like me. You won Rosie, and I was a good sport.”
The Doctor scowled, but Rose turned and smiled at Jack. “You were never after my heart, Jack.”
“You don’t know that,” he said, grinning back at her. “I could have stolen your heart from this old guy in minutes if I’d tried.”
“Oi! I’m right here!”
Rose giggled, stopping in front of her Mum’s door with the Doctor right behind her. Jack caught them up and clapped him on the shoulder. “Like we could forget, Doc.”
The Doctor shot Jack a dirty look, but Rose stood on her tiptoes and tugged his shoulder, bending him enough for a kiss. “Don’t worry, Doctor. M’all yours.”
~*~O~*~
Mickey’s report about the UFO sightings and increased test scores had intrigued the Doctor so much that he’d lined up teaching positions for himself and Jack starting the next day. Rose was hired as a secretary, earning no shortage of comments from Jack about fantasy fulfillment. The Doctor, for his part, ignored Jack’s randy comments - until Rose stepped out in a knee-length pencil skirt, patterned blouse, and tall heels, her hair in a sensible updo and slipping fake glasses up her nose.
The Doctor swore under his breath and immediately grabbed her by the hand, dragging her back to their room and leaving a laughing Jack behind in the console room. The Doctor had to take the TARDIS back in time an hour in order fo them to be punctual to their new jobs.
~*~O~*~
The Doctor and Jack were in the lounge of the high school with several other teachers, enjoying lunch, when the headmaster came in with Sarah Jane Smith. The Doctor gripped the edge of the table as he stood, his shock at seeing his former companion overwhelming.
“Ms. Smith is writing article about me,” the headmaster was saying. “I’m sure you’ll all be very complimentary.” He chuckled and a small titter of laughter rippled through the group, skipping the Doctor entirely. His eyes were locked on Sarah Jane.
She had aged, and the evidence of her age, her mortality, staring him in the face gutted him. In his memory, she was young and fresh-faced, running along beside him. Despite the lines on her face she still had the same spark in her eyes she had always had, and he clenched his hands by his sides to keep from rushing forward and embracing her.
She noticed his stare and walked toward him and Jack first.
“Hello,” she introduced herself with a smile. “I’m Sarah Jane Smith.”
“Oh, I should think so,” the Doctor said, pumping her hand and smiling brightly.
Jack gave him an odd look, then put his own hand out for Sarah Jane to shake. “Hi,” he said with his usual charm. “Captain Jack Harkness.”
“Captain?” Sarah Jane asked with a raised eyebrow.
“Former captain,” he amended, “current biology teacher. This is my friend, John Smith. His manners have escaped him.”
“John Smith,” Sarah Jane said in a wondering voice, turning to face him again. “I used to have a friend who sometimes went by that name.”
“Well it’s a very common name,” the Doctor offered.
“He was quite an…uncommon man.”
The Doctor’s answering grin was goofy. “Wasn’t he just?”
He winced internally at his own error.
“So, Ms. Smith,” Jack said, casting a look at the Doctor. “What will you be saying about our esteemed leader?”
“Oh, this and that,” she said absently, looking around the room.
“Mind you be careful,” the Doctor said, his voice a little dark. “Rumors of UFO sightings. Wouldn’t want to get mixed up with any aliens.”
“Oh, I don’t know,” she said with a wink. “I’m sure some aliens would be... rather fun.”
The Doctor swallowed hard and Jack elbowed him. “Well, Ms. Smith, it was lovely to meet you.”
“Yes,” she answered Jack, gaze fixed on the Doctor. “Very lovely, indeed.”
The Doctor nodded, his bright smile still plastered to his face, then watched Sarah Jane take her leave before he sat.
“You want to be careful there, Doc.”
“What for?” the Doctor demanded.
“She fancies you,” Jack said in a low voice, so as not to be overheard.
The Doctor scoffed. “That’s preposterous.”
“Trust me, Doc, I’m an expert on this. That lady we just met? She’s got a thing for you already.”
“Trust me, Jack.” The Doctor turned back to his sandwich, dismissing his friend. “I’ve known Sarah Jane for years upon years. She just didn’t recognize me. She used to be my companion.”
“Like Rose?”
The Doctor shook his head and swallowed his bite of lunch. “Nah. Nothing like Rose. Rose is one-of-a-kind.”
“Did you sleep with Sarah Jane?”
The Doctor put his sandwich down and looked at Jack, hard. “Not that it’s any of your business, but no. I told you, Rose is special. One-of-a-kind. There’s never been another like her, never will.”
“Alright.” Jack reached for his can of soda. “Just keep that in mind.”
~*~O~*~
“It’s so creepy in here,” Rose said later that night, back in her jeans and trainers. “It just feels weird.”
The Doctor felt it, too, but he didn’t answer her. He wanted to do this reconnaissance and get out as quickly as possible, getting Rose away from danger.
“Mickey, Jack, you lot check the maths and science departments, then go to the library and have a look. Rose and I are going to check the English department, computer lab, and gymnasium. You have your phones at the ready?”
“Yep.”
“Yep.”
“Good. Ring if there’s trouble, meet back here when you’re done. Good luck.” He took Rose’s hand and started off down the hallway towards the english department.
Rose waited until they were out of earshot before she said, in a low voice, “Mickey is going to catch on we’re more than just mates, you keep that up.”
“Let him. Tired of hiding, me.” He cut a sideways look at her then stopped to look at her fully. “Why? You still don’t want him to know?”
“Just don’t want to rub it in,” Rose said with a shrug.
“You’re mine now, it’s best he gets any false hopes out of his head early,” the Doctor said.
“We’ll tell him soon, yeah? I’ll tell him when we’re all done with this, before we leave. Just… not right now.”
The Doctor looked at her speculatively for a second then started back down the hall, her hand still wrapped in his. “S’long as he knows.”
“Jealous git,” Rose mumbled with a smile.
“Yep!” He gave her a goofy smile in return. “That’s me!”
~*~O~*~
The Doctor and Rose skidded to a stop in front of Jack and Mickey. “What is it? What happened?”
“I’m surprised you didn’t hear this one,” Jack jerked his thumb at Mickey, “screaming from the other side of the school. Nearly got us killed.”
“Killed?!” the Doctor demanded, clutching Rose’s hand.
“Yeah,” Jack said seriously. “We found a bunch of huge bat-things roosting in the headmaster’s office.”
The Doctor glowered at Mickey. “And you screamed? You could’ve woken them up! Killed us all!”
“Oi! It’s not like I meant to scream or anything!” Mickey protested. “Scared me, it did.”
The Doctor rolled his eyes. “Right. Well, you’ve no business here if you’re going to be scared out of your wits, screaming like a little girl. Take Rose to the chippy across the street and stay there until Jack and I come.”
“M’not goin’,” Rose protested. “Nice try, though.”
“Rose,” he warned.
“M’not, Doctor. M’stayin’ with you.”
“No, you’re not,” he insisted, urgency in his voice.
“Yes, I am.”
The Doctor looked up at Mickey and Jack for a minute. “Please excuse us for a moment,” he said with a false smile, just before he tugged Rose down the hall.
“What’s that about?” Mickey asked.
Jack watched the Doctor and Rose down the hall, out of earshot, both gesturing to each other emphatically. “I don’t know,” he lied.
“Looks like they’re having a row.”
The Doctor was talking, pointing at something in the middle distance. Rose shook her head and crossed her arms. The Doctor brought his hands together and Rose’s arms burst free, pointing down the hall towards them.
“Wouldn’t be the first, I doubt it’ll be the last.” Jack commented, still watching the couple down the hall.
“Blimey, that’s funny. Rose fancies him like mad, but she doesn’t mind telling him what’s what, does she?”
“Keeps him on his toes.”
The Doctor loosened his posture, looking nearly defeated. Rose sagged as well, lowering her head. The Doctor said something, and Rose nodded without looking up. He said something else and she nodded again, then he stepped forward and wrapped her in his arms. She put her arms around his waist and must have said something else, because they could hear his echoing laughter. The two pulled apart, joined at the hands, and came back to where Mickey and Jack stood, still watching them.
“Right. Like I was saying, Mickey, you take Rose and go to the chippy across the way. Jack and I will be along shortly.”
“You alright with that, Rose?” Mickey asked.
“Yeah, Micks, s’fine. M’hungry anyway.”
~*~O~*~
Rose was nothing if not surprised when the Doctor walked in to the chippy with Jack and the reporter that had been around the school earlier, toting something that looked like a robotic dog.
“Who’s that?” Mickey asked.
“Rose! I half-expected you to have wandered off.”
“No, I’m here,” Rose said with a smile, then turned to the other woman. Sarah Jane was staring at her. “You met Ms. Smith?”
“Oh, right! Rose, this is Sarah Jane. Sarah Jane, Rose.” His head bobbed between the two of them, and he was wearing his Father Christmas smile. Rose and Sarah Jane shook hands.
“You’re the secretary,” Sarah Jane said.
“Nah,” the Doctor, sitting the tin dog on a table. “Travels with me, Rose does.”
“Ah,” Sarah Jane said. “You can tell you’re getting older. Your assistants are getting younger.”
“M’not his assistant,” Rose spat.
“No? Well, get you, Tiger.”
“Anyway,” the Doctor said, shooting Rose a look.
Mickey laughed. “Oooh, mate. The missus and the ex. Welcome to every bloke’s worst nightmare.” He made a little oof sound when Jack elbowed him.
“Who are you, anyway?” Rose demanded.
“Sarah Jane Smith. I used to travel with the Doctor.”
“Yeah? He’s never mentioned you.”
The Doctor narrowed his brows, and Rose recognized it as the look he gave when he was evading something. “Surely I must have done. Sarah Jane was with me quite a while, before the Time War.”
“Hold on,” she pretended to think. “Nope. Never.”
Jack broke in. “Rose, we found a bunch of vacuum-packed rats in a cupboard. Can you think of a reason why they would be there?”
Sarah Jane answered, cutting Rose off. “Well, obviously they were there for the students to dissect.”
“Nobody dissects rats in school anymore,” Rose snarked.
“How would you know? Have you even finished school? How old are you, anyway?”
Mickey chuckled again, and Rose put her hands on her hips. Her lack of A-levels were a sensitive topic. “I’m twenty-one, I’ll be twenty-two in April. And you? What are you from, the Dark Ages?”
Sarah Jane made an offended noise and the Doctor stepped in before she could retort. “Rose, play nice.” She gave him a mutinous look. “Sarah Jane, c’mere and tell me what’s wrong with K-9.”
“K-9?” Mickey asked.
“S’my dog!” the Doctor said with pride.
“Why’s he look so ...disco?” Rose said with a curl of her lip.
Jack and Mickey laughed, but the Doctor and Sarah Jane said, “Oi!”
“That’s my dog!” Sarah Jane said hotly.
Jack jumped in again when Rose opened her mouth to retort. “Rose, I’m starved. Got any chips to share?”
Rose gestured to the table she was standing beside. “Help yourself.”
But her eyes were locked on the Doctor and Sarah Jane, sitting down at a table a few feet away, smiling at each other over K-9.
“It’s alright, Rose,” Jack muttered, in her ear.
She watched as Sarah Jane said something and the Doctor laughed, petting the robot and praising it as if it were a real dog. Tears welled in her eyes, but she blinked them away.
“Doesn’t feel alright.”
~*~O~*~
“I thought of you,” Sarah Jane said, effusive. “When the spaceship knocked into Big Ben, then crashed into the Thames?”
“Slitheen,” the Doctor said with a big grin, “from the planet Raxacoricofallapatorius. Raxacoricofallapatorians are normally a peaceful race, but this was a family of outlaws. Tried to blow up the Earth, they did.”
Sarah Jane beamed. “Looks like you limited them to blowing up Downing Street.”
“We did. Lucky to survive that one, we were.”
“We?”
“Rose and I did it, yeah. Harriet Jones was with us in the cabinet room!” he crowed while he tinkered. “Couldn’t have done it without her.”
“So Rose was there.”
“‘Course she was,” the Doctor said, twisting wires, not looking up. “Where else would she be?”
“She’s young,” Sarah Jane remarked.
“A bit, yeah. But she doesn’t act it. An old soul, Rose.”
Sarah Jane was quiet for a minute, then burst out. “You left me, Doctor.”
“Got called back to Gallifrey,” he said in a lower voice.
“You never came back,” she responded, choking on a whimper. “I waited for you. I thought you’d died!”
He cut his eyes at Rose, who averted her gaze when he caught her watching. “I told you I had to go, and humans weren’t allowed. You’d have been imprisoned.”
“Do you know what the hardest part is?” she continued, ignoring him. “It’s coping with what happens next - well, what doesn’t happen next. You took me to the farthest reaches of the galaxy, you showed me supernovae and intergalactic battles and then you just...dropped me back on Earth.”
He sat his sonic down and looked at her, hard. “You want me to apologize for all of the adventures we had, all those good times?”
“No, never,” she hurried to assure him. “But I got a taste of that splendor, then I had to go back. I missed it terribly. I missed you.”
“You’re doing alright. Look at you! Investigating aliens! You’ve got a fantastic life, seems to me.”
“You were my life.” She leaned forward and put her hand on his arm. “You, Doctor. Travelling with you. After all of that, seeing the stars and all of those amazing things... It’s terrible, being left behind. Being replaced.”
K-9 sprang to life, and the Doctor leapt from his seat.
”Greetings, Master.”
“He remembers me!” the Doctor cried happily, feeling Rose step up to his side. “Good dog, you’re such a good dog. Ready to go to work, K-9?”
”Affirmative,” the robot said.
“Jack, got the sample of the oil?” Jack dug in his pockets.
“What’s that?” Rose asked.
The Doctor took the jar and opened it while Sarah Jane answered. “It’s oil from the kitchens. They’re cooking the chips in it.”
“School lunches are compulsory,” the Doctor explained. “I want to know what’s so special about this oil that they’re forcing it on the children.” He rubbed a sample of the oil on a sensor.
”Analysis complete. Substance is Krillitane oil.”
“Krillitanes,” the Doctor said in a dark voice. “Haven’t seen them in years. This is bad. Very bad.”
“What are the Krillitanes?” Jack asked.
“They’re a warlike, adaptable species, and they adopt bits of the peoples they conquer. Of course I didn’t recognize them. Last time I saw them, they looked just like us but had long necks.” He paused and looked at Rose with wide eyes. “Rose! Did you eat any of the food today? Specifically the chips?”
“Of course I had the chips, Doctor. You know me.”
He paled. “C’mon,” he said urgently, grabbing her hand and dragging her to the door. “We’re going to the TARDIS.”
Jack watched them go, concern etched on his handsome face. Mickey’s expression was a picture of confusion. Sarah Jane just watched.
The three looked at each other. “Stay here,” Jack said, grabbing his coat and dashing out of the door, Mickey in his wake.
“Not a chance,” Sarah Jane muttered, following.
~*~O~*~
Jack unlocked the TARDIS when they got back to the Powell Estate and rushed inside, anxiety crowding his movements. “Doctor? Rose?” he called out.
“Where would they be?” Mickey asked.
“Infirmary,” Jack said, thinking quickly. He knew that Mickey didn’t know about the babies, and Sarah Jane didn’t, either. “You two stay here,” he commanded, spinning around. “I’m going to go check on them. I’ll be right back.” He took off running.
Jack got to the infirmary door and stopped. Rose was lying supine on the examining table, her hoodie gone, jeans unbuttoned and shirt pulled up. A small bandage was in the crook of her elbow and the Doctor was spinning on his stool with a device attached to a machine. “Gonna have a look, Rose.”
“Is she alright, Doctor?” Jack asked, and he could hear the worry in his own voice.
“I think so,” the Doctor replied, not looking up, squirting some gel on Rose’s abdomen. “Waiting for the bloodwork now.”
“M’fine,” Rose insisted. “I only ate a couple chips, anyway. Couldn’t stomach ‘em. They tasted funny.”
“Probably the oil.” The Doctor’s brow furrowed further with this new information and he set about putting the wand to her belly. An image, black and grey, appeared on the wall in front of them.
Jack heard quick footsteps sounding behind him and turned his head to see Mickey and Sarah Jane come to a stop just inside the infirmary door. He turned and held his hands out, trying to shepherd them back into the corridor. “Rose is fine, no problem. Let’s get back to the -”
“She’s pregnant,” Sarah Jane muttered.
“What? Can’t be,” Mickey scoffed, shaking his head. “She’s not, and she’ll tell you she’s not. We haven’t been together in - well, it’s been two years and a bit for me. Reckon it’s been a year less than that for her. We only broke it off officially four months ago.”
“That’s an ultrasound, Mickey.” Sarah Jane pointed over Jack’s shoulder.
“Let’s go,” Jack said. “Give them some privacy.”
“Why’d they need privacy?” Mickey demanded.
“Get ‘em outta here, Jack,” the Doctor snapped.
“Outta my way, Captain Cheesecake,” Mickey pushed past Jack, who stepped aside once he was through, figuring the damage was done. Sarah Jane followed, looking dazed.
“Rose, tell ‘em you’re not pregnant. We can’t be.”
“You’re not,” the Doctor snarled.
“Alright, that’s enough,” Jack said. “You’re upsetting Rose, and they need to make sure the babies are okay. Surely you don’t want anything to happen to Rose or her innocent babies, do you?” Jack pinned Mickey with a glare. He looked mutinous, but shook his head. “Let’s go to the console room. You can ask all your questions later.”
Jack ushered Mickey into the corridor with widespread arms, pointing down the corridor towards the console room. Mickey followed his direction, scowling, and Jack turned and gave Sarah Jane a pointed but sympathetic look. “Sarah Jane?”
She seemed to snap out of a daze. “Right, yes. I’m coming.” She stepped to the doorway, but turned her head one more time to look at the Doctor. Jack glanced over as well, seeing the Doctor reach up to wipe Rose’s tears, then stand to kiss her forehead. Sarah Jane lowered her head at that, then started walking towards the console room.
~*~O~*~
“Rose, love, s’alright,” the Doctor soothed once the room was cleared, sitting back down and taking her hand. “The babies are fine, you’re fine.”
“S’not that,” she objected, then sat up. The Doctor took her hand to help pull her into a sitting position, but Rose pulled her hand away as soon as she was upright, not letting the touch linger.
“He was going to find out sometime, Rose. Mind, it’s not ideal…”
“That’s not it, either,” Rose cried, reaching up to wipe her own tears. “It’s Sarah Jane.”
“Sarah Jane? Why would you care about her finding out?”
“It’s not that she found out, you arse, it’s that you were with her and you never bloody told me!”
“I was never with her, not the way I’m with you,” he replied, stroking her hair, attempting to soothe. “We never...danced.”
She jerked her head away from his hand, denying him the touch. “But she traveled with you, then you left her behind.”
“I had to, Rose. I got called back to Gallifrey and humans weren’t allowed. She’d have been arrested, or worse. I had to keep her safe. I’d have kept her with me if I could, but -” Rose burst into fresh tears, and the Doctor knew he’d said the wrong thing. “Oh, love, it’s not like that. Never was.”
“Couldn’t tell from my end. All huddled together like that.”
“Now stop it,” the Doctor snapped, hurt and anger tinging his words. “I’ve told you Sarah Jane and I weren’t together. That’s all there is to it.”
“How many others have there been? Have you… danced with companions before me?”
“No,” he said honestly. “And there have been lots of companions over 900 years. I loved every one of them, but not like I love you.”
Rose cried harder. “I’ve been to the year five billion, yeah? But this...this is really seeing the future. You’re going to take my babies and leave me one day!” She covered her belly and bowed her head, weeping.
“Stop it, Rose.”
“No!” She jerked her head back up at him. “You’re lying to me, Doctor! I know it!”
He took a steadying breath and recited the names of all of the moons of Aym IV to calm himself. Finally, he spoke in steady, quiet tones, “You’re getting hysterical, and there’s no call for it. I’ve told you over and over I’m not going to leave you behind, and I meant it. Stuck with me, you are. And that’s all there is to it.”
“No it’s not! You left her behind!”
“She’s not you, Rose!”
“She wants to be!”
The Doctor froze and gaped at her, mouth open in shock. His memory turned over his time with Sarah Jane, both years ago and in the last few hours. Flirtatious smiles, casual touches… Blimey. Rose was right.
“You just realized that she fancies you, didn’t ya?” Rose sneered, then mumbled to herself. “Bloody figures. Probably took you two fucking centuries to get a clue.”
The Doctor shook his head. “She might do, but it doesn’t matter. She’s not you and never will be. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about her before, but I had no way of knowing we would run into her,” he asserted.
Rose didn’t answer, just swiped at her tears. “It’s fine. Really. I’m fine. Go, deal with them. Get it out of the way. We have the Krillitane to deal with.”
“No! You’re staying here when we go back to the school tomorrow. I don’t know what’s going on, but Krillitanes are nasty and they won’t hesitate to kill you. They can’t be reasoned with.”
“You can’t just lock me up like a bauble while you go adventuring!” she shouted.
“Oh yes I can, if that’s what keeps you safe and with me!”
“Go,” Rose said suddenly, pointing towards the door. “Go deal with Mickey and Sarah Jane. Tell them whatever, I don’t care.”
“Rose…”
“No. I don’t want to talk to you right now, Doctor.”
“Don’t be like this.”
“Be like what? Pissed off? Scared? Tough shit, Doctor. I get to feel whatever I feel, and you don’t get to tell me otherwise.”
The Doctor clenched his fists by his side, angry but defeated. For the moment. They’d talk more later.
“Right. I’m going to talk to Mickey and Sarah Jane. Anything I should tell them?”
“Tell them the truth, whatever that is,” she snapped. “And tell Mickey he and I will talk more about it later. I can’t deal with this right now. M’going to bed.”
“I’ll be in in a bit.”
“Don’t bother,” she threw over her shoulder. “I’ll probably be asleep. Sleep in your own room.”
Rose left without looking back, and the Doctor ran his hands over his face and short hair, growling in frustration.
Notes:
Into every fic, a little angst must fall...
The next chapter will contain plot and sexytimes. If you'd like, I'll be happy to send you an edited version with no sexytimes in it.
Chapter 11: School Reunion (part 2)
Summary:
Rose and the Doctor talk about Sarah Jane and her fears, and the conclusion of "School Reunion".
Notes:
Special thanks to tenroseforeverandever, my beta, who encouraged make-up sex. More special thanks to her, mountaingirlheidi and crazygirlne for looking over and correcting the smut.
I have the best readers in the world. Your comments are more welcome and appreciated than I could ever tell you. They keep me going when I'm ready to throw up my hands.
This is a bit of a long one, but I split it from the last chapter to make it a bit more manageable.
Any recognizable dialogue comes from the episode "School Reunion".
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Rose heard the door to their room open and slammed her swollen eyes shut, not wanting to talk to him. She was furious, and he needed to understand that - even if the Doctor couldn’t understand why.
She tensed at the sounds of him stripping off his clothes, the leather of his jacket making a muffled whump when he tossed it onto the chair in the corner that had become its home. There was a slight grinding sound when the drawer opened and she knew he was tugging out his pajama bottoms. A moment later she felt cold air on her back and the mattress dipped. Within a second, he was spooned up behind her.
“M’sorry, Rose,” he murmured to her shoulder, kissing it. He put one arm under her head and his other hand smoothed over her arm, moving down to her hip then sliding up to her waist. “I should have told you about Sarah Jane. I didn’t think it was important.” He kissed her shoulder again. “You’ve no idea how precious you are to me. I’d die a thousand deaths before I let you go.”
She didn’t respond. Tears splashed to her pillow, out of his sight, and she fought the urge to sniffle.
“I know you’re awake, Rose. Will you please turn over to talk to me?”
“Go away, Doctor.”
“No.”
“I said ‘go away’. Go have adventures with her. I’ll just stay here and…breed.”
“Rose -”
“I said I don’t want to talk to you.”
She felt his head plop onto the pillow right behind her own head, and his arm circled her waist, tugging her flush against him. “Alright, then. I’ll just stay right here and hold you until you realize how much I love you.”
“Oh, no you don’t.” She spun around to face him and scooted backwards a bit. “You think that’ll make everything better? Holding me? You can’t just cuddle this away, Doctor.”
“M’not trying to make it go away, M’trying to make you understand. I’m never leaving, Rose. And honestly, after this night, I never want you to doubt it again. Had enough of it, me. I know your body is doing crazy things-”
“It’s breedin’, Doctor. My rubbish human biology is breedin’ for you,” she said, her words dripping sarcasm.
“You’re not breeding, Rose. Stop that.”
“Your words,” she retorted, petulant.
“You’re pregnant, and carrying our children. Our babies. Not yours, not mine. Ours. And there is nothing you could ever say or do to make me leave you and these babies. So by all means, say whatever you like. Call me names and accuse me of daft, imaginary sins. It won’t matter, because there’s no one for me but you, and I’m not leavin’.” He reached his hand out to wrap around hers.
“What about Sarah Jane and Mickey?” Her voice was still cross, but he could tell he’d gotten through to her.
“Sarah Jane hasn’t seen me in something like twenty years, linear time. She was bound to be jolted by seeing me again, I understand that. And I didn’t ever come back when I left her, never explained anything. Turns out I even left her miles from home to boot. I owe her apologies, which I made.”
“And Mickey?”
“He’s upset, and no mistake. Had a lot to say to me. Quite an impressive set of lungs, him. But Jack and I both told him that nothing happened until after the two of you split for good in Cardiff. I think that he knows it was over long before that. But he wanted reassurance and I gave it to him. He deserved that, at least. It’s been four months for him, even if it’s only been two-and-a-half for us. I think he could do with an apology, too.”
“Yeah,” she agreed, a tear running down to the tip of her nose. The Doctor touched it, taking it away.
“He’s agreed not to tell your mum. I told him we’d be telling her in a few weeks. It’s getting close to time, Rose.”
She nodded and was silent for a few moments. “Would you have left me?”
“To go back to Gallifrey?”
She nodded.
“I didn’t want to go in the first place, I didn’t want anything to do with their bloody political machinations. But if it came down to staying here and having the Time Lords out to get us or going back and keeping you safe, then aye, I’d have gone.” Rose let out a sob, and he cupped her cheek. “But Rose, I would have come back for you. I’d have used the TARDIS to come back right after I left. You’d have hardly missed me.”
“Do you mean it?” She didn’t mean to sound so desperate, and cleared her throat to correct herself.
“Of course.” She leaned into his touch and felt another tear slip out. “I’m not leaving this bed until you believe that, Rose.”
“I don’t think I can believe you,” she sniffed with downcast eyes, her lip quirking. “At least the part about me hardly missing you. Rubbish driver, you are.”
“Oi!” he exclaimed, but his soft, genuine smile belied the mock outrage. “Am not.”
He leaned forward to kiss her before she could answer, and Rose felt her heart begin to race at the touch of his lips to hers. He kept the kiss soft and chaste, then put his forehead to hers.
”Doubt thou the stars are fire,
Doubt that the sun doth move.
Doubt truth to be a liar,
But never doubt I love.”
He shook his head slightly, then brought his face closer to hers, rubbing the tip of his nose along hers. “Never doubt I love, Rose.”
“I’ll do my best,” she whispered.
“That’s all I can ask.”
The Doctor’s eyes pierced hers, as if he were trying to communicate his desire to her solely with the way he looked at her. His eyes flicked down to her lips and back up to her eyes, then he closed them and moved toward her.
His arm slipped around her waist and his hand splayed across her back to pull her close while his lips slid against hers: soft and tender motions intended to soothe, to entice, to convey all he felt without speaking. She reciprocated slowly, allowing him to lead, feeling the last of her anger drain away. He broke from her for just a moment, long enough to whisper his devotion against her lips before he covered them again.
Rose trembled a little, such strong emotions rolling through her that she was sure he could feel them under her skin. She opened her mouth just a little and he sent his tongue inside, exploring and claiming. She felt his hand situate itself against her hip and pull her closer still until she felt him growing harder against her thigh.
“Is that alright?” he asked, grinding himself against her a little, letting her feel exactly what he was talking about.
It was more than alright. “Yes. Please.”
“Fantastic,” he husked, then rolled her beneath him.
Rose wasted no time slipping her hands around him to the waistband of his pajama pants and then up, touching the skin of his lower back, earning a groan and gentle roll of the hips from him. She raised one knee beside his hip without realizing she’d done it, her attention focused on the kiss that grew more heated every moment, their tongues passing each other then withdrawing before one or the other pressed forward again, tongues tangling.
The Doctor held himself above her, putting his weight on one elbow to give his other hand freedom to explore. It skimmed her waist down to her bum and further, to her thigh. He gripped her and pulled her toward him, pressing their hips together. Rose moaned into his mouth, and she felt him smirk.
Her own hands were splayed across the skin of his back, fingers alternately digging slightly into his skin then releasing to glide to another part of the wide expanse and grip him there. He was hers. Hers.
The Doctor broke their kiss to trail his mouth down her body, planting open-mouth kisses on her chin, then moving down to her jaw. Rose instinctively exposed her neck to him, and he licked and kissed up the line of her jaw to the sensitive little spot behind her ear. She gasped when he licked her there and ground his hips into her at the same time.
“Like that, do you?” he said, his voice heavy against her.
“Yes,” she hissed.
“Your skin is so warm, Rose, but it’s not hot enough. I want you to feel me burning your skin for days,” he said just before he took her earlobe into his mouth to nibble and suck it. “I want you to know that you’re mine, that I’m yours.”
She bit her lip and nodded, unbidden tears filling her eyes. Ruddy hormones.
He opened his mouth against her neck just behind her ear and licked her once before sucking. She gave a little cry and he pulled the sensitive skin deeper into his mouth, nibbling it.
He released her leg and the pulse point behind her ear at the same time, his hand gliding up while his mouth made its way slowly down her neck. She gasped a little at the sensation of his hand slipping under the hem of her shirt and skimming up her skin.
“I love seeing you in my jumper, Rose. You’ve no idea what it does to me,” he murmured against her collarbone. “I see it on you and I just want to rip it off.”
He raised himself away from her and she whined, missing his touch immediately. He tugged at his jumper on her, drawing it up and over her head with a single smooth, quick motion, throwing it behind him and descending on her before she had a chance to open her eyes.
She gasped when his mouth landed on her nipple and brought her hands up to his head, feeling the soft, short hair beneath her fingers while she alternated between stroking his scalp and grabbing his head. She arched her back, pressing her breast more firmly against him and he opened his mouth to take her in. His hand came up to grab the mound of her neglected breast, massaging it while he sucked as much of the other into his mouth as he could.
Rose’s breath hitched, and he released her with a little pop, switching sides. She sighed when he took her into his mouth this time, biting her lip when he scraped his teeth against her sensitive nipple, moaning when he let it go.
His mouth didn’t leave her, though, and he slid his lips down her chest and belly, stopping every so often to lick the soft skin he found. Rose clutched his head to her and rolled her back, thrilling on the sensation of his cool tongue dragging across heated skin.
“What do you want, Rose? I’ll give you anything you want.”
Rose’s mind raced with all the things she wanted him to do to her, and her mouth simply opened and closed wordlessly.
“How about if I do this?” he asked, sliding his mouth lower.
Yes. Yes, do that, Rose tried to say, but nothing would come out but a soft, keening sound.
“What about this?” He nuzzled her at the juncture of her thighs, her knickers a barrier to where she really wanted him. Rose had never cursed a scrap of fabric more in her life.
“I could do this,” he volunteered, hooking his fingers into the waistband of her knickers and tugging a little. Rose immediately raised her hips and he chuckled darkly, accommodating her unspoken wish, pulling them down and away.
“That gives me the freedom to do this.” He pressed a kiss to her newly-exposed curls and Rose cried out. The pregnancy hormones had made her much more sensitive and she desperately wanted more. She’d never wanted something so much in her life.
“...and this,” he purred against her, then delved his tongue in.
Rose was finally able to articulate, “Yes, oh God, more of that, please.”
“More, you say?” he smirked against her, then laved from her entrance upwards, circling her clit slowly with the hard blade of his tongue.
“More, yes, more, like that,”
“Hmm. Interesting. Seems I’ve found -”
“Shut up and get on with it,” Rose ground out.
He laughed and she was sure she’d kill him, then he parted her lips with his fingers and plunged his tongue inside.
Rose shouted and jerked her hips upwards. He hooked her thighs over his shoulders and brought his arm around to hold her down. “Be still,” he ordered.
“I can’t,” she whined. “Feels so good…”
He went back to his work, swirling his tongue around the opening she wanted him to fill, then licking up her slit until he found the little nub that made her keen.
He slid a finger in, sliding it in and out exactly twice before adding a second finger alongside it. She struggled against his arm, wanting more, wanting him to move, and once again, he acquiesced to her silent plea. The Doctor moved his fingers within her, in and out with the occasional upwards curl while his tongue began to move against her clit without pattern or rhythm.
Rose had been unable to speak earlier, now she babbled incoherently. “Christ Doctor, please yes, you’re gonna make me…oh God, don’t stop...feels so…yes…” She begged and moaned in turn, making no sense and clenching around his fingers.
She brought her hand up to her mouth, embarrassed by her inability to stop begging, and he stopped immediately. She gave a choked sound at the loss of his mouth.
“Don’t do that. I want to hear you. Let me hear you, my Rose.”
She sobbed in relief when he returned his tongue to her clit and began the motions that were making her wild. She ground herself against his face as best she could, wanting more, needing more, pleading and praising.
He redoubled his efforts at her words, pumping in and out, fucking her with his fingers and suckling at her clit.
“Doctor...I’m gonna...I can’t...you’re gonna make me…fuck, Doctor…”
“Come, Rose. Come for me, love.”
The orgasm took her suddenly. Her mind and body exploded in an irrepressible detonation of pleasure, calling out to deities and screaming his name, beseeching him with desperate entreaties, howling for something she couldn’t name.
The Doctor gentled her down, then slipped his fingers out and licked them clean.
Rose lay boneless on the bed, breathing heavily, her heart thudding, her blood fizzing in her veins.
The Doctor swiped the back of his hand across his mouth and crawled up her body, planting soft kisses as he went. Rose’s skin was too sensitized to handle his mouth on her and she jerked at every touch. He smirked against her breast then sucked it mischievously and Rose gasped out his name.
His mouth left her body but she had no time to wonder where it went before she felt his pajama-clad erection pressing against her where he’d just been and his mouth claimed hers possessively.
“I want to feel you come again,” he murmured against her mouth. “I’m going to make you come again. Are you ready?”
The Doctor was surprised when Rose flipped him over and climbed on top of him, straddling his thighs.
She grabbed his vest and pulled, crawling backward and dragging him to the edge of the bed.
Oh yes, he thought. He tugged his vest off as he followed her.
He perched on the side of the bed and Rose sank to her knees in front of him, dragging her tongue down his chest and abdomen, sliding her hands down his bare back and slipping her fingers under the waistband of his pajamas.
She brought her hands around to the front of him while she licked the little trail of hair that ran down from his navel . He breathed heavily, nearly panting, when she put her mouth on his cock, mouthing and licking him over the two layers between them.
Those two layers were completely unacceptable and had to go. Now.
The Doctor raised his hips against her mouth to shove down his pajamas and pants, and Rose had him in her hand before he even knew he was free. She wasted no time before she took him into her mouth and he threw his head back, something between a grunt and a moan escaping from him.
Her mouth was hot torture, and he fought the desire to thrust. His fingers threaded through her hair, blonde locks spilling from his hands. Rose released him for just a moment, and her tongue licked him from base to tip before taking him back in.
“Rose,” he cried brokenly. “Oh, God, Rose...”
The Doctor’s entire brain was whittled down to the sensation of her hot mouth sucking and bobbing on his cock; he felt every movement, the swirling of her tongue, the glide of her lips, the heat of her mouth on him. Her hand wrapped around what her mouth couldn’t reach, sliding up and down his cock in a steady, increasing rhythm.
“Rose, please...I can’t...Rose…”
She squeezed him tighter and sucked harder, and he kept himself from throwing her on the bed and fucking her senseless with some shred of self-control he didn’t know he had.
“I’m gonna come, Rose...you’ve gotta…oh yes...I’m gonna…if you don’t stop…Christ.”
Rose redoubled her efforts, sucking him as if she’d never tasted anything so good in all her life, then removing her hand and taking him down into her throat.
The Doctor felt as if every nerve was on fire when he came; his world was sensation and ragged pleas and the feel of himself emptying into her waiting mouth.
Everything came back into hazy focus when Rose lifted from her crouch to plant kisses on his chest, and his control broke. He lifted her and twisted, placing her firmly on the bed and crawling between her legs. She giggled until she saw the intensity in his eyes.
“I hope you’re ready, Rose Tyler. You just made me come, but that won't stop me from fucking you hard, right now. No refractory period, me,” he promised before entering her, thrusting hard enough to rock her shoulders into the bed. She cried out his name. He groaned at the wet heat wrapped around his cock. “So hot...so tight, Rose.” Then be buried his face into her neck, nibbling and sucking. “Gonna be doing this,” he emphasized with a rock of his hips, “for a while.”
She made a strangled noise, then started a litany of pleas mixed with his name. He hushed her with a kiss, claiming her mouth with pure possession, the heat and pressure from her lips telling him that she was claiming him as much as he was claiming her.
“Mine,” he grunted, and she squeezed around him.
“Mine,” she returned, and he whimpered against her.
The Doctor slipped a hand beneath her thigh, hooking her knee as he had before and drawing her leg around his waist. She brought the other one up on her own and locked her ankles. The angle gave him deeper penetration and Rose choked out an affirmation, her nails scrabbling for purchase on his back.
He moaned when she babbled about how he was hers. He thrust faster, his hips moving in a rapid dance of conquest and retreat, and he slipped his hand between them to the place they were joined.
“Yours,” he confirmed, panting with pleasure and exertion. “I love you, M’all yours, only yours.”
She flew apart at his words, clenching and fluttering around his cock, and he realized that his promise of stamina was going to be broken. He tried desperately to think of other things to prolong their pleasure, but all his mind would allow him to think about was how her breasts bounced against his chest, how her short nails were digging into his back, marking him and how she felt like a hot, wet vise on -
The dam broke, the pressure released, light exploded behind his eyes, and he fell over the ledge into oblivion. If he’d been able to think, he’d not have recognized his own voice as it creaked, growled, moaned and yelled when he lost himself inside her. His breath was coming in ragged, uneven gasps when he collapsed beside her, and his heart was content and singing.
~*~O~*~
The two of them woke the next morning, wrapped around each other as usual. Rose had claimed his jumper the night before like she always did, and the Doctor slipped his hand just under the hem, resting his hand over the the slight bump that held the babies and caressing with his thumb. Rose hummed at the touch, sliding back to press herself more firmly against him, cuddling closer. The Doctor planted an open-mouth kiss to her shoulder and up to her neck, then nuzzled her hair with a happy little sound. Neither wanted to leave the contented little cocoon they’d made for themselves. Eventually, at the last possible minute, the two broke apart, made themselves presentable, and went to greet Jack and their visitors.
They had a small row in the galley over the unresolved issue of Rose going to the school with everyone. She had seen this one coming and already decided what she would concede and what she would fight for. She reckoned the Doctor had done the same.
Rose wanted to go along with him, Mickey, Jack and Sarah Jane; to be in the thick of everything. The Doctor (and Jack) insisted that she needed to stay behind in the TARDIS. Krillitanes were vicious, remorseless creatures that killed without discrimination, they pointed out to Rose. Rose argued that she was not an invalid and most certainly wasn’t ignorant. She’d been traveling with the Doctor for over a year, she said, and she’d never backed down yet. There was no reason for her to stop being who she was just because she was pregnant and besides - she wanted to be where they were. She’d be safer that way. Mickey and Sarah Jane wisely stayed out of it, pretending not to listen at the kitchen table on the other side of the galley.
They compromised after only a few minutes and a few tears from Rose - she could go to work at the school, but if he told her to leave, she needed to run back to the TARDIS as quickly as possible. Neither were particularly happy with the arrangement and Jack was uncharacteristically grumpy for a bit afterwards, but all three accepted it with relative good grace.
The talk with Mickey was tense, but Rose felt alright about it in the end. She explained that nothing had happened between her and the Doctor until after they parted in Cardiff, when their relationship was finally, officially, completely over. She didn’t tell him that she and the Doctor had been cuddling and holding hands nearly constantly for months leading up to Cardiff - she figured he probably already assumed as much. Jack and then the Doctor had both assured him of the same thing the night before, and he seemed somewhat mollified by Rose’s compassionate reassurances. They shared a hug (she ignored the Doctor’s jealous look from where he stood, tinkering on K9 with Sarah Jane), and Mickey kissed her on the forehead, telling her that he was happy for her. She didn’t believe him just now, but knew that her best mate eventually would be as pleased as he claimed.
Rose left to get ready for work, and Sarah Jane followed. “Rose? Can we talk?”
“I have to get ready to go work at the school.” She paused. “You could come talk to me while I get dressed, though, if you want.”
Sarah Jane smiled and nodded. “I’d like that.”
Rose led her to the room she shared with the Doctor and opened the door. “C’mon in. There’s a chair in the wardrobe, we can talk there while I get changed.”
Sarah Jane looked around the room, her eyes wide and mouth open. “My room on the TARDIS was the biggest, nicest room I’ve ever had. But it was nothing like this.”
Rose blushed, not knowing what to say. Finally, she decided on, “Wardrobe’s this way.”
“Is the wardrobe room not there anymore, then?”
“Nah, it’s still there. The TARDIS just brings clothes to me here most of the time.”
Sarah Jane had a seat in the cushy chair. It was the place Jack usually sat when she was getting dressed for an excursion, offering comments and suggestions like the best mate he was. A couple of times, the Doctor had come and had a seat there with arms crossed and an attempt at a sour expression on his face to grouse at Rose about taking so long. She’d made a point, those times, to tease him with sexy clothes and flashes of skin until he scooped her up and carried her to the bed just outside.
Regardless of whether it was her best mate or the Doctor sitting there, Rose always enjoyed those relaxed moments in her personal wardrobe room.
Rose felt a twinge of guilt when she looked at Sarah Jane sitting in the big chair: not because Sarah Jane looked incredibly uncomfortable, but because she didn’t care about (and, to be honest, was actually a little pleased with) Sarah Jane’s discomfort. She shouldn’t be so petty and she knew it, but the thought that this woman fancied the Doctor, her bloke, didn’t sit very well.
Sarah Jane squirmed a bit, but spoke anyway. “I really am sorry. I don’t know what came over me, last night.”
“S’alright,” Rose said. “The Doctor tends to make people a bit barmy.”
“How far along are you?” The words seemed to burst out of Sarah Jane, as if she couldn’t contain them.
“Eight weeks and four days,” Rose replied, putting her hand on her belly. “I’m showing already, a tiny bit. Makes it hard to find clothes.” She turned back to the closet, riffling through her clothes. “The TARDIS is giving me roomy things for now, sweet old thing.” She gave the wall an affectionate pat.
“Twins, I believe the Doctor said?”
“Yes.”
“I see,” Sarah Jane said, bowing her head. Then she looked up. “About the Doctor: I’m not interested in picking up where we left off.”
“No? With the big sad eyes and the robot dog? What else were you doing last night?”
Sarah Jane huffed, “I was just telling him how hard it was adjusting to life back on Earth. I saw things you wouldn’t believe, couldn’t understand!”
“Oh yeah?” Rose crossed her arm and cocked one hip. “Try me.”
“Mummies.”
“I’ve met ghosts.”
“Robots. Lots of robots.”
“Slitheen. Big, farting, body-snatching aliens. In Downing Street!”
“Daleks!” Sarah Jane shouted.
Rose scoffed. “Met the emperor.”
“Anti-matter monsters!”
“Gas-masked zombies!” Rose was shouting now.
“The Loch-Ness monster!”
“Seriously?” Rose asked, impressed. The two women looked at each other, then chuckled nervously.
“Oh,” Sarah Jane said, closing her eyes and covering her face.
Rose smiled a little. “Listen to us. It’s like me and my mate Shireen -- the only time we ever fell out was over a bloke, and we’re arguing over the Doctor.” She thought for a second. “When you traveled with the Doctor, did he do that thing where he’d explain something at, like, ninety miles an hour, and you’d go ‘what’, and he’d look at you like you just dribbled on your shirt?”
“All the time!” Sarah Jane laughed, and Rose laughed with her. “Does he still stroke bits of the TARDIS?”
“Yes!” Rose exclaimed. “Yes, he does! And I’m like, ‘do you two want to be alone’?”
The two women giggled together, Sarah Jane putting her hand on Rose’s shoulder for a minute.
“Rose? You ready to go?” a voice called from her room.
The Doctor appeared at the doorway to the wardrobe and looked between the two women. Sarah Jane and Rose laughed harder.
“How’s it going?”
Rose pointed at him and Sarah Jane doubled over. The Doctor furrowed his brow.
“Oi! Stop it, you two!”
The women just laughed harder while the Doctor pretended to scowl.
~*~O~*~
The Krillitane were vanquished, killed by their own oil.
The Doctor went out to meet Sarah Jane when she came, then stepped back into the TARDIS. Rose smiled brightly at the older woman, pleased to find that the anger she’d had at Sarah Jane was dissipated now that they’d had a good chat and each had apologized for being rude to the other. Part of her hoped that Sarah Jane would accept their offer to travel. It would be nice to have another woman along.
“Not sure what I think about the new console room, Doctor,” Sarah Jane said, looking around at everything.
“D’you like it?” he asked, chuffed.
“Oh, I do,” she hedged. “But I think I preferred it as it was. It’ll do, I suppose.” She noticed Rose and smiled. “Hey, you. Ready for another secretarial position?”
Rose snorted a laugh at her new friend. “Doubt it. Don’t think I’m cut out for that line of work. Got time for a cuppa?”
“I can’t stay long,” Sarah Jane said, “but a cuppa would be nice.”
Rose and Sarah Jane made their way back to the galley, leaving the men behind in the console room. Rose made them each a cup of tea, then sat at the table.
“I’m really very happy for you, Rose. It’s just...hard.”
Rose reached across the table and took Sarah Jane’s hand, squeezing. “I’m so sorry.”
“Well,” Sarah Jane said with a smile. “It’s been quite a while since we traveled together, and we were never - well, we were never a couple.”
“He told me.”
Sarah Jane nodded. “I’d like us to be friends,” she told Rose. “I mean, the Doctor was always my friend and I hope to see him occasionally, now that I’ve found him again. But I don’t want there to be any bad feelings between the two of us.”
“No, I wouldn’t want that, either. And I’d love for the two of us to be friends.” She grinned wickedly. “I’d also love to hear more stories about him.”
Sarah Jane matched her mischievous smile. “Well, at the time I traveled with him, he wore this ridiculous scarf…”
“Oi!” the Doctor said from the doorway, his lip quirking up. “That scarf was fantastic!”
Rose and Sarah Jane laughed, then Sarah Jane stood. The three started back, slowly walking the short distance to the console room.
“I suppose I should go,” Sarah Jane said in a small, sad voice.
Rose cut her eyes at the Doctor and he cleared his throat. “Right, about that. We’re headed off, but we’d love you to come with us.”
Sarah Jane gave a little sigh and shook her head. “I can’t do this anymore. Besides, I’ve got a much bigger adventure ahead! Time I stopped waiting for you and found a life of my own.”
Rose stepped forward and hugged the older woman. “I’ll miss you,” she said. “I’m glad we’re friends.”
“Me too,” Sarah Jane said with a squeeze. “But I hope I don’t miss you much! You’ll be back, yeah?”
“Yeah,” the Doctor told them. “We’ll be around.”
Sarah Jane pulled back from Rose and patted her cheek fondly. “You’re clever, Rose Tyler. Quite clever, indeed. More than a match for him.”
Jack snorted. “No kidding,” Mickey laughed.
“Oi!”
Rose and Sarah Jane spared him a glance, then giggled together. Sarah Jane pulled Rose into another hug. “Come find me, when you come back, if you need to. You can always come find me.”
Rose nodded onto her shoulder, her eyes burning with tears. “I will.”
Sarah Jane patted her cheek again, then started towards the door. The Doctor followed her, and Jack came over, putting his arm around Rose’s shoulders. “She’ll be alright.”
“She will,” Rose agreed. “She’s a strong lady. A sweet, strong lady.”
Notes:
I'm switching posting days to Mondays and Thursdays starting, well, today.
There may be some delays in posting next week and the week after (although I should still be able to get the chapters up) - my dad is having open heart surgery and I'll be on the road quite a bit with that. I'm currently four chapters ahead, though, so it really shouldn't be a problem...just wanted to give a heads-up.
It's a bit early, but I'd love suggestions for baby names! They have nicknames already that I've been calling them when talking with tenroseforeverandever, but if you have a super-cute nickname, send it in! I'd love a lot of names to choose from...so help me out!
Also, how mad will you lot be if this goes a chapter or two beyond the projected 26? There's a lot to fit in...
Coming soon: Our heroes meet the antagonist of this story!
Chapter 12: New Earth
Summary:
"If someone had told me that I’d be talking to a big head in a fish tank that was billions of years old, I’d have laughed fit to burst. But here I am. And you’re a good sort to chat with, eh? A good listener." She gave the tank a cheeky grin. “Never would have believed in any of this, before. Then that git I love blew up my job and I ran away with him. Fell in love with him, I did.”
Rose, the Doctor and Jack visit New Earth and run into an old enemy.
Notes:
Do you remember when we talked about how some episodes would be happening, but would be out of order and completely different?
That has now become applicable. It's important to the plot, though.
tenroseforeverandever betas for me (and she's the best beta ever), but any mistakes are my own.
Thank you so much for your kind comments. I know I say that a lot, but I really am unbelievably grateful for every one of them. <3
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
*~*~*Ten Weeks*~*~*
“Uh-oh, Rosie, strong smell alert!”
Rose sighed in defeat, looking a little green at just the thought. “Where’d you drag us now?” she asked, turning a weary gaze to the Doctor.
He was defensive for only a second before he saw her tired, teasing smile. She’d been such a trooper so far, and he figured it must be daunting to look ahead on almost an entire year of your body not really belonging to you. He knew it was going to get worse before it got better, but he was hesitant to tell her that.
Instead, his face softened and he slipped his arm around her waist. She lay her head over on his shoulder.
“If it’s bad, we’ll leave,” he said simply. “But you don’t have to go out there at all if you don’t want to. You could stay here and rest.” The Doctor covered her lower belly with his large hand, an affectation he’d picked up over the last couple of weeks since there had been a slight rounding visible only to them. It comforted him. Even if they hadn’t been able to see a slight bulge to her lower abdomen the fatigue, sensitive nose, and easy tears had kept all of them very aware of what was happening within her.
Rose covered his hand with her own and gave another small, tired smile. “It’s okay, Doctor. I’m sure it’s fine.”
“Did you take your vitamins?”
“Of course.”
“Did you eat?”
“Yes, dear.”
The Doctor snorted at her. “No need to get stroppy, love.”
“We’re fine, Doctor. Just tired.”
He furrowed his brows for a second, sizing her up, then relaxed. “Alright, Rose. You’re the boss.”
She touched her tongue to her lip and he felt a tightening in his gut, just like always. He doubted, somehow, that that feeling would ever change. “Good to hear,” she teased. “C’mon, let’s go see what awaits us on New Earth!”
~*~O~*~
Rose felt dizzy not long after they exited the TARDIS together, but refused the Doctor’s demand that they all return to the ship at once. Instead, Jack lay his long, grey military jacket out on the ground like a blanket and she sat down to gain her equilibrium. Jack joined her while the Doctor hovered nervously.
“You’re makin’ me nervous, Doctor. Sit!” Rose commanded.
He did so with much grumbling and ill grace.
“So that’s a hospital?” Jack asked, indicating the large building across the bay.
“Yes,” the Doctor said, still a little sullen. Rose raised her eyebrow at him.
“Is it safe for me to be in a hospital?” she asked.
The Doctor was affronted. “Rose Tyler, do you honestly think that I would put you and my children in harm’s way? How in the whole of time and space could you possibly think that I would take you somewhere dangerous?”
“You take me dangerous places all the time, Doctor,” she reminded him.
He clenched his jaw a little at her cheeky tone. “Not intentionally.”
“Of course you don’t do it intentionally.” She slipped her arm through his and put her chin on his shoulder in a placating manner. “It’s just that I’m not the only jeopardy-friendly person around here, yeah?”
He scoffed but didn’t answer her directly, instead addressing her earlier question about the safety of the hospital. “Most of the time, mothers’ bodies protect their unborn. That’s no different for you, Rose, your body is guarding the children from what it can. But there’s the fact of the babies being Gallifreyan.”
“What does that mean for Rose?” Jack asked. He’d been a bit more protective of her in the weeks since he’d learned of her pregnancy, and it had helped ease Rose’s mind a bit to know that she had one more person looking after her and her babies. The Doctor wouldn’t admit it out loud, but it had pleased him, too.
“A Gallifreyan’s auto-immune system is infinitely superior to a human’s, so while it could be dangerous for you to be exposed to some of these things on your own, as long as you’re pregnant, Rose, you’ll be safe - and so will they.”
Rose looked at him carefully. “You’re absolutely sure?”
“‘Course I am!” He pulled away from her, offended. “Honestly, Rose!”
“Okay, okay, I’m sorry.” She pulled him back over to her and cuddled his arm. “I’m just protective of these babies, is all.”
The Doctor raised his head suddenly with narrowed eyes, staring at what seemed to be nothing as if he’d just missed seeing something and was still trying to.
“What is it?” asked Jack.
“I thought I saw something.” After a moment he seemed to relax and shrugged. “Just an animal, I suppose. Trick of the light, maybe. S’gone now.” He kissed the top of Rose’s head. “I know you worry, love. Me too.” She raised her face to his, smiling, and he ducked his head to give her a quick kiss.
“I can’t get enough of the two of you.” Rose spun her head to see Jack watching her and the Doctor with a smug smile. “It’s beautiful, really. And I’m just so proud to be responsible for it.”
“Oi!” the Doctor protested. “S’not true!”
Jack cocked an eyebrow at the Doctor. “Are you telling me you ever would have gotten your ass off your shoulders and made a move if I hadn’t come along?”
The Doctor scowled. “Might’ve done.”
Jack laughed and Rose bit her lip to keep from giggling. She raised up to peck the Time Lord’s cheek instead. “Well, whatever the reason was, I’m glad you finally got your arse off your shoulders. I rather like your face there.”
The Doctor shot Rose a mock-annoyed look while Jack howled.
~*~O~*~
“A human! Mistress, it’s a pure-blood human!”
“Impossible!”
“But it is, mistress! Look!”
The young man, covered in paisley markings, turned the device he was watching to face his mistress. Her eyes were barely capable of showing emotion, but she narrowed them with interest as she watched the screen in front of her. Recognition dawned on her, and the blue eyes widened with surprise, then delight. “The Doctor is here! He’s here, and he’s got his little blonde tart!”
The Doctor on the screen was giving the little chav a look that seemed chastising. “Rose, you need to stay with me while we sort out why we were called here. Don’t go wandering off.”
The little chav smiled and rolled her eyes as she pulled herself to her feet, her hand in the Doctor’s. ”Yes, Doctor.”
”I’m serious, Rose. I’m starting to wonder if I shouldn’t have brought us here after all, even if it is safe. Should have just waited…” His words trailed off.
Rose put her hands to her hips on the little screen. “Doctor, we’ve been over this, but I expect we’ll go over it a thousand more times before it’s all over, won’t we? I’m pregnant, not an invalid.”
“Pregnant!” Cassandra cried. The flap of skin seemed to quiver a little while the blood pulsed through it harder, with excitement. “Chip! Chip!” she cried out. “We have it, the answer at last! Quick, you must get one of the Sisters for a psychograft!”
“What are you going to do, mistress?” Chip busied himself, gathering the needed materials.
“That blonde bit of fluff is a human, but she’s pregnant with a Time Lord’s baby! Time Lords are nearly immortal, and they don’t age! If I can get some of that baby’s blood…” She drifted off for a moment before she snapped back to attention, finding Chip looking at her, paused in his work. “What are you waiting for! It’s time! You must go!”
“But mistress,” he whined, “can’t you just take some of the girl’s blood?
“No, no. It has to be the baby’s blood. Her blood is still too...human.”
“What if they try to lock Chip away?" The servant sounded nearly desperate with fear. "What if they try to take Chip away from the mistress?”
“Pish-posh,” Cassandra dismissed him. Then she cooed, “No one is going to take you away from me, pet. Don’t fret. Now, moisturize me, quickly, then run along and bring one of the good sisters down for me. You know what to do. That’s it,” she encouraged as he scurried off. “Good pet.”
She heard the doors to the lift close and let the lips that spread across her sheet of skin droop from the false smile she’d worn for Chip’s benefit. He’d be taken prisoner by the Sisters of Plentitude, of course he would, but with any luck at all it would happen after she had taken one of their bodies and could see to his disposal personally. He really had been a good pet. She’d reward him with a quick disposal.
But back to the subject at hand… the little blonde chav was pregnant… with a Time Lord! Oh, this was better than she ever could have hoped. With the psychograft she would be able to possess the body of one of the Sisters of Plentitude, giving herself an entirely new life. But she’d have to change bodies frequently, since most sentient beings couldn’t tolerate being possessed for long. That bit was problematic: she’d leave a trail of bodies in her wake and likely be caught... eventually.
Now, though… the little bimbo was carrying Time Lord genes. Just a few drops of that baby’s blood and she could go to the nearest lab and synthesize immortality for herself and whatever body she decided she’d like to keep.
Oh, she was brilliant. The humans never would have died out if they’d all been as clever as her.
Cassandra heard a clattering around the corner and Chip ran in, wild-eyed and making soft, stupid sounds of distress with a cat in a wimple behind him.
“Mistress! Mistress!” he cried out when he spotted her.
“Very good, Chip!” she shouted exuberantly. “Now, you know what to do!”
Chip turned and ran towards an alcove. The nun followed him, but shrieked suddenly when she found herself caught in beams of light that held her arms and legs still.
“What are you doing?” she yowled, her arms and legs spread-eagle.
“What is your name?” Cassandra demanded.
“Sister Gato!” she replied, caterwauling.
“Excellent!” Cassandra shouted. “Chip! Do it now!”
Chip flipped a switch and the cat screamed for a moment, then fell to the ground. He toggled the switch to off, then let out a wail when he saw the ragged and torn skin left hanging in Cassandra’s frame.
“Mistress!” he wailed.
“Hush, Chip, I’m right here. Moisturize me.”
Chip scurried to fetch the spray bottle, but Cassandra held up a white-gloved hand. “Fingers,” she said in awe. “Hands…” She put her hands on her cat-like face and cried out, “Face! Oh, let me see!”
She ran to the mirror and her face fell. “Ugh. I knew what to expect, but still.” She turned back and forth in the mirror, adjusting the wimple. “Could be worse, I suppose, but must I smell like fish?” Chip opened his mouth to answer her, but she waved him off. “Never you mind. I’ve a Time Lord and his concubine to find. Take me back to the place you found me,” she commanded him, “and remember. My name is Sister Gato.”
~*~O~*~
Jack had gotten quiet as they trekked towards the hospital around the bay, his comments and jokes dwindling as they got nearer. Rose was concerned that her usually ebullient friend seemed so withdrawn but when she spoke to him about it, he just asked questions.
“When are you two going to tell Jackie?” he asked as they approached the water.
“Umm…” Rose hesitated, looking up at the Doctor. He shrugged.
“I dunno. Not planning on doing the telling, me.”
“Oi!” Rose squeezed his hand, indignant.
“What?”
“We talked about this!”
“I thought you were joking!”
“You’re going to make me do it?” she pouted a little.
“‘Course not. I vote we just don’t tell her,” the Doctor said, tongue-in-cheek.
“Oh ha, ha. Very funny, Doctor.”
“Who’s joking?”
“You’d better be,” she warned, eyes narrowed.
“What, you want me to waltz into your mother’s flat and say, ‘Oh, hi, Jackie, lovely day, innit? By the way, I got your daughter pregnant with twins. Cuppa?’” He looked down at Rose incredulously when he finished.
“Well not like that, of course,” she reproved.
“Then how?”
“How about, ‘Jackie, Rose and I realized that we’re in love and are starting a family together. Now. A big one.’”
“Rassilon, Rose, are you trying to get me slapped again?”
Rose rolled her eyes. “She’s not going to slap you again, Doctor.”
“Oh yeah? You didn’t see the look on her face last week when she came out of the loo after her shower and spotted us on the couch together.”
“That’s because I’m her daughter, Doctor, and she doesn’t want to see me tangled up on the settee with a bloke, barely keepin’ from shaggin’ each other rotten!”
“That’s my point!” the Doctor insisted. “She gave me a dirty look when we were just watching telly together. And we’re not just...shaggin’, ta.” It was his turn to pout a little.
“No, we’re not. But she needs to know, Doctor. I’m her daughter and these are her grandbabies,” Rose replied in what she thought was a reasonable tone.
“Well then why didn’t you just tell her when we were there?”
“Uh, remember how we discussed that we wanted her to have more time? Then there were the giant space bats that were eating students and trying to take over the universe with chips? Remember Sarah Jane and Mickey?”
“Don’t remind me,” he mumbled. She ignored him.
“And then she found us on the couch in a compromising position. That didn’t seem like the best possible time to tell her we were pregnant." Her tone changed into something more speculative. "I dunno... I was kind of waiting for the right moment and it didn’t come because of everything happening. But we can’t just wait around until the right time, you know. We have to tell her.”
“You have to tell her,” the Doctor grumbled petulantly. “I have to get smacked.”
Rose had won and she knew it, and she decided to ease his defeat. She grabbed his elbow and raised on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek. “If she slaps you, I’ll kiss it better. But don’t worry,” she assured him. “Once she gets over the shock, she’s going to be thrilled.”
The Doctor scowled and Rose beamed at him. “Oh, I know!” she exclaimed. “We could always have Jack tell her! She loves Jack!” Rose turned her head to look at her friend, and her face fell when she saw him. He looked pale and drawn, afraid somehow. It was not a look she’d seen on Jack before and did not like seeing now. “Jack?”
“I think I’m going to go back to the TARDIS,” Jack said. Rose and the Doctor came to a stop, and the Doctor turned to look at the Time Agent.
“Alright there, Jack?”
“I think so,” he said. “It’s just...something feels wrong. I’m not meant to go into that hospital, I know it.”
Rose looked confused but the Doctor nodded sagely. “Do you want us to come back with you?”
“No, I think once I’m in the TARDIS I’ll be fine. I just...I don’t want to get any closer.”
“Understood,” the Doctor said. “We shouldn’t be long, but you have your phone if you need us. Call Rose.”
Jack nodded and Rose stepped forward, putting a hand on his arm. “Jack? You sure you’re alright?”
He gave her a smile that didn’t quite meet his eyes. “I’m alright, Rosie. Honest. I’m just… I can’t get any closer to that hospital.”
The Doctor stepped forward. “Go back, Jack. We’ll not be long. Rose.” He tugged on her elbow. “He’s fine. Let’s go.”
Rose looked back and forth between the two men uncertainly, then stepped backwards, towards the Doctor. “Take care of yourself, Jack. We’ll be home soon.”
He nodded and waved, and the Doctor gave another little tug on her elbow, leading her away from Jack.
~*~O~*~
The doors to the lift opened and Rose stepped out behind the Doctor, scowling at his back as she tried to put her hair in some semblance of order. Her impromptu shower had been unexpected, to say the least, and she wasn’t exactly thrilled with the surprise. The Doctor, of course, had found the whole thing utterly refreshing and was beaming at her as if he’d just blessed her with a great, big gift.
“You could’a warned me, you know,” she grumbled at him.
The Doctor’s smile was unrepentant. “Could’ve done, but then I’d have missed you grabbing onto me when the disinfectant startled you. Right pleasurable, that.” Rose opened her mouth to protest and the Doctor grabbed her hand, tugging her away from the lifts. “C’mon, now, let’s not dally!”
Rose griped to herself but followed the Doctor willingly, curling her fingers around his.
“Excuse me,” the Doctor asked politely, smiling at a cat nun. “Is this ward 28?”
“Senectics. Just down the corridor,” the nurse replied, pointing. The Doctor nodded his thanks.
“Now, Rose, don’t stare,” the Doctor muttered from the corner of his mouth.
“They’re cats,” she whispered urgently.
“Aye, they are. And damned good nurses, to boot. In fact…” The Doctor released her hand and stepped over to look at a patient. “...they’re very good…” He grabbed the man’s chart from the foot of his bed and glanced over it before looking back up at the man. “This man shouldn’t be alive. How long have you been like that?” the Doctor asked abruptly.
Rose looked at the man, whose eyes were open wide, seeming to be startled by the Doctor’s rudeness.
“Checked in four days ago. The Sisters say I can go home in the next day or so.”
“You have volatile epidermic geoplasticity, aye?” The man nodded up at the Doctor from his hospital bed, and the Doctor peered at the chart. “Four days… patients are meant to be dead from that after less than 24 hours. The survival rate is nil.”
“Doctor,” Rose said through clenched teeth. She was ignored.
The Doctor went to look at the IV bag dangling above the patient, then turned to the patient next to him, doing a cursory examination. “You. You have pink nail syndrome, am I right?”
“Yes,” said the young woman. “But I’m going home now. My husband is on the way ‘round with the car.”
The Doctor didn’t answer her, just stepped to the end of the bed and grabbed Rose by the elbow. “She’s supposed to be dead, too. There are no cures for either of those.”
“Are we safe, Doctor?” Rose covered her abdomen unconsciously.
“‘Course you are,” he answered flippantly. He looked around the ward, finally spotting a large tank in the corner. “C’mon. I found who called us here.”
~*~O~*~
Rose felt a rush of warmth and affection when they approached the Face of Boe that she couldn’t explain.
“Are you a friend?” the nun sitting beside him asked.
The Doctor crouched by the tank. “No, only met him the once.”
“I’m Novice Hame,” the nun said to Rose with a smile that revealed pointed, feline teeth.
Rose took the proffered hand and shook it. “I’m Rose Tyler and this is the Doctor.”
The Doctor was murmuring to the face in the tank, dragging his fingers down the glass. Then he stood up and turned to the women, clapping his hands once. “Right! I need to see the Mother Superior.”
Novice Hame nodded. She lay a comforting hand on the tank, then turned to the Doctor and Rose. “Come with me.”
The Doctor took Rose’s hand as they followed her, and she brought them to a type of nurse's station where two more nuns sat.
“Matron Casp, Sister Jatt, this is the Doctor and Rose Tyler.”
The Matron raised a hairy eyebrow at the Doctor. “I think you’ll find that we’re the doctors here.”
The Doctor wasted no time. “What medicines are you using to treat these people?”
“Medications of our own invention,” Sister Jatt answered haughtily.
“Alright then, thanks for that.” The Doctor gave them a jaunty smile and bounced on his heels. Rose looked at him, puzzled. “We’ll be back in a mo, just gonna explore your fantastic hospital a bit.”
They stepped away, and the Doctor shook his head at Rose, indicating she should be quiet. She did so, and he walked her to a terminal in the wall. He pulled out his sonic and started scanning, stopping occasionally to press buttons on the terminal then starting back up with the sonic.
“They shouldn’t have the capability to treat patients the way they are,” he muttered. “And I need to know how they’re inventing medications.”
“Aren’t medicines usually made from a bit of the disease themselves?”
“Vaccines were invented that way, not usually medications. But you’re thinking on the right track. Something’s fishy - and not just the nuns’ lunches. Geddit, Rose?”
She huffed a laugh at his stupid joke and the terminal flashed a screen. “Got it,” he muttered. “Right, Rose, I need you to sit with the Face of Boe for a bit.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m going down to Intensive Care and, if they’re doing what I think they’re doing, it could be not just dangerous but deadly.”
“Doctor!”
He put a hand on her arm. “Don’t worry, Rose. I’ll be fine, and the air is sterile here. You and the babies will be alright. But you can’t come with me.”
She screwed up her face in frustration, and he gave her a quick kiss. “I’ll be back. Just wait with Novice Hame at the Face of Boe.”
And with that, he was gone, leaving a disgruntled and confused Rose to stand at the beeping terminal alone.
~*~O~*~
Novice Hame had not returned to the Face of Boe, so Rose took the nun’s seat next to the tank. She had again felt the warm, happy feeling when she approached the huge, disembodied head, and wanted to investigate a bit.
The Face of Boe had its eyes closed, but Rose spoke to it anyway.
“Hello. I don’t know if you remember me, I was on Platform One with the doctor. A flap of skin tried to kill us all. My name is Rose Tyler.” She scooted forward just a bit so that the people surrounding wouldn’t hear her being absolutely barmy and chatting up an aquarium.
“They say you’re billions of years old, is that true? You must have seen lots of things. The man I travel with, the Doctor, he’s not quite as old as you but he’s seen lots of things, too. He can travel in time.” Rose looked down at her fingernails, then back up at the Face of Boe. “He took me with him, then we found Jack and he came along, too. The Doctor didn’t want to take Jack at first, but I talked him into it. Now they get on like houses, even if they fight like brothers sometimes. Lots of testosterone on that ship, there is.” She chuckled to herself. “I do alright, though. They both love me in their way.”
She felt another surge of the pleasant feeling, and figured the Face of Boe was being a polite listener and happy for her good fortune of having two people who cared so much for her.
“We travel all over time and space together, the three of us. It’s wonderful,” Rose continued, smiling. “We have adventures sometimes, but sometimes we’re just tourists. The Doctor, though, he knows just about everything in the bleedin’ universe, so I end up learning a lot.”
Amusement bubbled in the back of her mind.
“If someone had told me that I’d be talking to a big head in a fish tank that was billions of years old, I’d have laughed fit to burst. But here I am. And you’re a good sort to chat with, eh? A good listener.” She gave the tank a cheeky grin. “Never would have believed in any of this, before. Then that git I love blew up my job and I ran away with him. Fell in love with him, I did.” She sat for a moment, pensive. “Jack said something funny a bit ago. He said that the Doctor and me wouldn’t be together if it weren’t for him. I think he was probably right. And you know what?” She leaned forward conspiratorially. “The Doctor and I are havin’ babies. It’s true! It wasn’t supposed to happen, but here we are. It used to be just me and Mum, but now there’s the Doctor and Jack, too, and soon there will be the babies. My little family.”
Rose felt another groundswell of something like love. Then a tingle of alarm. She raised her head to study the Face of Boe, and a voice spoke behind her.
“Hello.”
Rose spun on the stool, the alarm she felt not fading, growing instead. “Hello,” she answered politely.
“Did I hear you say you were going to be having a baby?”
Rose was apprehensive, but she nodded. She didn’t bother to correct the nun about the twins.
“Oh, how wonderful,” the nun said, clasping her hands together in front of her. “You must be terribly excited.”
“I am, yeah. I’m sorry, who are you?”
“Oh, please forgive me, my name is Ca- Sister Gato. Did I also hear you say you travel in time?”
The tingle of alarm was becoming more of a mauve pulsing. Rose nodded and tried to think of ways to get away from the nun and back to the Doctor.
“That’s just delightful,” the cat-in-a-wimple said. “Are you here to look over our nursery? Our maternity ward is the safest place in three galaxies to deliver a baby.”
“Hadn’t gotten that far yet.”
“Oh, do consider us. I’d be pleased to take care of you, personally. It’s rare for us to see pure humans anymore.”
Rose felt a prickle of fear and knew that she’d never allow her babies to be born here. She debated with herself about how to say that to Sister Gato, but before she could open her mouth to speak, a commotion down the corridor gave her the perfect excuse to end the conversation. “Sorry, gotta run,” she announced, leaping to her feet and running towards the source of the hubbub, confident that the Doctor was involved somehow.
~*~O~*~
She skidded to a stop at the end of the corridor, finding the Doctor in front of an open cupboard door, pulling out colored IV bags and throwing them into a bin beside him.
“Doctor!” she called.
He didn’t hear her. “Bloody torture, that’s what this is. It’s unconscionable! Those are people!”
Novice Hame and Matron Casp looked on anxiously, poised as if to try to stop the Doctor but too afraid to try.
“Please,” Novice Hame begged. “There’s no other way for us to heal them! We had to!”
“You had to grow people and keep them sick? I don’t think so,” the Doctor sneered.
Rose blinked in confusion. Grow people?
“Now, I’ll be going back to intensive care and administering this to every last person you’ve locked away, then setting them free.”
“But what will we do for our patients?”
“You’re clever, you’ll figure it out!”
The Doctor finally seemed to notice her. “Rose, go back to the TARDIS. Stay with Jack. Don’t argue, don’t wander off, just get straight to the TARDIS. I’ll be along shortly.”
He picked up the large bin beside him that was full of colored, liquid medication and started off down the corridor, two nuns hurrying along behind him.
~*~O~*~
“It was the weirdest thing, Jack. I was talking to this great big head in a jar, and I swear I believe it was sending me feelings!”
“No,” Jack said. “Can’t be.”
“I’m serious! I told it all about you and the Doctor and travelling around, and it kept sending me...I dunno how to describe it. Happiness?”
“This great big head was happy for you?” Jack scoffed.
“I’m serious! It was like...like it was fond of me.”
Jack laughed out loud. “Of course it was, Rosie. Everyone loves you.”
She blushed a little, then mentioned, “While I was talking to it, though, this cat nun came up to me and started chatting me up. I felt weird about it.”
“Weird how?”
“She overheard me telling the Face of Boe that I was pregnant, and she asked about the baby. I didn’t tell her there were two.” Her brow creased. “She wanted me to come back to their hospital and give birth there. She was really insistent. It made me nervous.”
Jack looked alarmed. “I hope you told her no!”
“I didn’t get a chance to. She was talking and then-”
A key sounded in the lock at the opposite end of the console room and Rose stopped talking, turning her pleased face to the man in leather shutting the door behind him. He turned to walk up the ramp and Rose stood to go meet him.
“Don’t,” he held up his hands in a warding-off gesture. “Don’t get close to me, Rose. Not until I shower. You should go take one, too, although I’m sure you’re safe. The TARDIS would have detected anything wrong with you.”
“What were they doing, Doctor?”
“I’ll tell you in a bit. Gotta get clean. Meet in the galley in an hour?”
Rose and Jack nodded, and the Doctor fixed her with a look. “Go shower, Rose. Now.”
The Doctor was very rarely heavy-handed with her, and she wasn’t pleased that he was so demanding now. But there was something in his face and his tone that held her back from smarting off to him. He sounded...afraid. A little desperate. If taking a shower could relieve him, Rose would do as he asked.
She nodded again and he started down the hall.
“That’s odd,” Jack said. Then he shrugged. “Guess I’m cooking tonight, then. Whattaya in the mood for, Rosie?”
“Steak. And chips. Or a Caesar salad.”
“As you wish, milady. Now go do what the Doctor said, and I’ll meet you in an hour.”
~*~O~*~
Rose walked into the galley about 45 minutes later, pulling her hair into a pony as she rounded the corner. The Doctor pushed off the counter where he’d been talking to Jack and came to her, putting his arms around her and pulling her close.
“You’re alright,” he said into her shoulder.
Her brows knit in confusion. “‘Course I am,” she said, bringing her hand up to stroke the back of his head soothingly. “What about you, Doctor? You alright?”
He breathed in, inhaling her scent at her neck. “M’fine, Rose. Just scared about you.”
“M’fine, Doctor. It’s all alright.”
The Doctor raised up and planted a kiss on her forehead. He looked into her eyes for a minute, and she sensed something unfathomably deep reaching out to her. Rose wondered if the instinct he’d mentioned earlier had kicked in.
He snapped out of it almost immediately. “Come! Sit, Rose. Jack has been cooking.”
“Trying to cook,” Jack called over his shoulder as he flipped something on the burner. “This guy keeps snitching food.”
“Doctor,” she admonished with a smile, sitting down in the chair he was holding out for her.
“What?” he said innocently. “Smelled good.”
“Does smell good, Jack,” she told him.
“Damned right it does,” Jack preened.
The Doctor walked over to Jack and plucked a bit of carrot from the plate beside him.
“Hey!”
Rose giggled when the Doctor shot her a mischievous smile and leaned back against the counter. Jack just shook his head and turned back to the stove.
~*~O~*~
“We shouldn’t have gone there,” the Doctor was saying. “It was stupid of me. Arrogant.”
“It wasn’t arrogant, Doctor. There was a need and you took care of it.” Jack answered him from his usual armchair, but instead of sitting with his legs draped over the side the way he usually did, he was sitting properly, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees, looking at the Doctor earnestly.
The Doctor shook his head in self-recrimination. “Foolish mistake. Could’ve killed you and the babies, Rose.”
“But you didn’t, Doctor,” she said, reaching across the small space between them on the couch to take his hand in hers. “You saved thousands of lives. You created a new race!”
“Was it worth it, though? Putting you and the babies in danger?” He didn’t give her a chance to answer. “Oh, I wish I could go back to that hospital and kick the Face of Boe for putting us in that position.”
“Isn’t the Face of Boe all-knowing?” Jack asked.
“Supposedly, yeah.”
“Maybe he knew everything would be okay. Maybe he didn’t doubt your or Rose’s safety at all,” Jack reasoned.
The Doctor had heard of stranger things, but he just huffed in response.
“So, just to recap,” Rose said, “You loaded all of the medicines into the system that kept the living flesh sick?”
“Aye,” he said. “And the next time the misters went off in their containment units, instead of giving them a dose of disease they got a top-up of cure.”
“What are the Sisters of Plenitude going to do now?”
“Most of ‘em will rot in jail,” the Doctor snapped. “And good riddance to bad rubbish, I say.”
“But Doctor,” Rose pressed. “What about the patients? The people? What if they get sick?”
“Oh, I left behind a few doses of every type of medication so that they could manufacture more. And I left word with them that if I got wind of experimentation on living beings again, I wouldn’t be as merciful.”
Jack sat back in his chair. “Well, I guess that’s fair enough.”
“S’a miracle you didn’t catch something, Rose. We’ve got to be more careful.”
“M’alright-”
“I know you’re alright,” he said, squeezing her hand. “But I have to keep you alright. We can’t do anymore little adventures like this.”
“But Doctor -”
“No,” Jack said gently. “The Doctor is right. We need to stick to sightseeing for the time being.”
“I don’t like this.” Rose’s voice quavered, then twin tears fell to her cheeks. “You two love going on these adventures - all three of us do - and now you’re not going to do what you love because...oh!” She pulled her hand away from the Doctor and covered her face, crying.
The Doctor slid over to her, pulling her into his arms. She went willingly, burying her face in his chest and crying. Jack stood and walked to the couch, sitting on the other side of her, rubbing her arm.
“Rose, this isn’t a hardship,” the Doctor said to the top of her head.
Jack agreed. “It’s really not, Rosie.
“But you two...you love going out and finding trouble!”
The Doctor didn’t say anything for a minute, then he spoke. “D’ya remember Jabe?”
Rose sat up a little and wiped her cheeks. “That tree you fancied?”
“You shagged a tree?” Jack quirked an eyebrow. “I gotta say, Doctor, I never saw that one coming.”
“I didn’t shag her and I didn’t fancy her!”
“Sure you didn’t,” Jack grinned with a knowing nod, dragging the word out.
"You did too fancy her," Rose muttered and laughed a little against the Doctor’s chest when he grumbled. He gave Jack a quelling look.
“What I was going to say, before I was so rudely interrupted, was that she said something while we were on Platform One that’s stuck with me. She said ‘Perhaps a man only enjoys trouble when there’s nothing else left’.”
“Okay, what’s that got to do with me?” Rose griped.
“Rose, I’ve got something now. I’ve got a great deal to lose. The idea of seeking out adventure and trouble isn’t nearly as appealing because I have a family.”
“And you’d just give all of it up? All of this, for me?”
“You know he would, Rosie. And me, too. Whats a few months of the slow path going to hurt?” Jack waggled his eyebrows. “Maybe I’ll even meet someone back in your time.”
Rose snorted and shook her head. “Randy git.”
“That’s me,” he confirmed.
“What I’m saying, Rose - what we’re saying - is that dialing back the danger isn’t a hindrance. On either of us. We’ll get back out there eventually and have more wild adventures. We’ll topple dictatorships and get arrested for holding hands and defeat monsters, the three of us together, but you have to be kept safe for now.” She sniffled, looking at her hands in her lap and the Doctor looped his finger, putting it under chin and tipping her face up to his. “Do you understand? We’re happy to take a break.”
“The three of us? Team TARDIS on the slow path?” she asked in a small voice.
“Not yet. But soon,” the Doctor said. “I love you too much to put you in danger.”
“I love you, too,” she cried, then reached over to take Jack’s hand, too. “I love both of you!”
“Kinky,” Jack said with a grin.
“Harkness,” the Doctor growled.
Rose gave a watery laugh and shook her head at her boys.
Notes:
Coming soon: fluff... and maybe a hint of angst.
Still need names for those babies!
Chapter 13: Discussions and Plans
Summary:
The Doctor and Rose discuss the logistics of her pregnancy, and Rose learns a couple of things about the Doctor that she didn't know.
Notes:
This chapter doesn't further the plot a great deal, but it sets up the next few chapters.
For some reason, ao3 tried to format this with all italics, line by line. I went through and I think I got everything, but if there's a stray line that's italicized, I'm sorry in advance.
This fic has overshot its prequel in every way, and guys...I can't even. Thank you so much for your support with this story.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
*~*~*Thirteen Weeks*~*~*
The Doctor lay with his head in Rose’s lap while she stroked his hair. He’d let it grow out a few millimeters and the strands were silky beneath her fingertips. They were both enjoying the casual affection.
Monty Python’s Flying Circus played on the large screen, and Jack let out a shout of laughter every now and then from his position in the armchair that was unofficially designated as his. The Doctor, who had his eyes closed in contentment instead of watching the screen, still seemed to be listening to the telly and would smile or chuckle every now and then.
Rose was not watching at all. Her thoughts and eyes were on the Doctor.
She was twelve weeks along now, starting to show a bit more, and according to the books she’d read should start to feel the babies before long. Quickening, they called it. Rose imagined it wouldn’t be long before the babies would be duking it out in there.
She stroked the Doctor’s beloved cheek and he leaned into the touch, smiling. She smiled down at him, even if he didn’t see.
Oh, that man. She had no idea what she’d done to deserve him, but whatever it was, it must have been beyond good. It must have been spectacular.
Her smile widened. It must have been fantastic.
He had been a saint about her pregnancy so far, if a bit overprotective. She tried to understand: he’d warned her that his instincts were going to be strong, and she suspected that they may be more intense since she was carrying Time Lords, meaning he would no longer be the last. She didn’t voice that thought, of course, but it was there. Still, she chafed over the mollycoddling while she was able to fend for herself.
The Doctor had been attentive and understanding, but he wasn’t smothering her. Not really. She’d fought him from time to time, but she knew he was trying hard not to be overbearing, and factored that into her arguments. They’d rowed a couple of times about her ability to do everything she used to do, but like it always had, the arguments didn’t last long and they always worked it out fairly quickly, usually compromising.
Rose had been in relationships before. She went with Jimmy for months, but it was a toxic, stinking thing that nearly broke her. She’d rebounded with Mickey and, although she cared deeply about him, it wasn’t the kind of love someone built a lasting romantic relationship on. Mickey had said it himself - they were nice. Nice was all fine and well, but Rose had wanted more.
She got it when she ran away with the Doctor. She’d fallen in love with him well before she had the nerve to do anything about it. She couldn’t pinpoint the moment she fell for him, but they hadn’t been together long and it had taken her by surprise when she realized. Jimmy and Mickey had both been older than her, but the Doctor really was older. Even his outward appearance was much older than any bloke she’d ever dated or been interested in.
She discovered quickly that it didn’t matter to her one bit.
The Doctor explained that although he told her he loved her, and frequently, it was a trite word that he wasn’t particularly fond of. He told her that almost every other language had a better way to describe how he felt about her. She had thought him a bit mad when he first complained about the word aeons ago after she said she loved something they had seen at a festival, but now that they were together and the babies were coming, she understood what he meant. He was her everything, and believed that she was his. But English had no other word, really, to describe their relationship. So ‘love’ was what they went with.
He’d told her several weeks ago he wanted to marry her, and she still couldn’t believe it. The Time Lord who hated domestics wanted to settle down into the ultimate domestic situation - a wife and children. Not only was he willing, he wanted to. It sounded ludicrous to her, but he truly seemed happy about the turn of events that had left them tied together for as long as she lived.
The credits rolled for Monty Python. The Doctor turned his head to kiss the palm of her hand, then sat up. He aimed the sonic at the screen and turned it off. Jack stood up, stretched, and announced he was going to bed.
“G’night, Jack.”
“Goodnight, Rosie. Doctor, you two make sure you behave yourselves in here. It’s a common area.”
“S’my ship, Jack.”
Jack just gave him a cheeky grin. “I know that. But you never know, maybe I won’t feel like sleeping after all and come back in here to watch television.”
The Doctor gave him a hard look that fooled no one. Both Rose and Jack could see the good humor underneath. “Good night, Jack,” he said by way of dismissal.
Jack chuckled. “Goodnight!”
The Doctor waited until he was gone, then slid over to the corner of the couch, propping one leg up, beckoning for Rose. She smiled and scooted over towards him, putting her back to his torso and leaning her head back on his shoulders, closing her eyes happily. He brought his hands around her to rest on the slight swell of her belly and she relaxed into the touch. After a few minutes, though, he hadn’t said anything and she wondered.
“Doctor? You alright?”
“Hush, love. Communicating with the babies, me.”
Rose turned her head to look at him. His eyes were closed in concentration, and a light smile played at his lips. “You can do that?”
“Maybe. It’s a mite early now, but I’ll be able to later. They’ll be able to actively communicate at around the midpoint of your pregnancy.”
“What do you mean, ‘actively communicate’? Like, they’ll be able to tell me to lay off the garlic?”
He chuckled, his eyes still closed. “No, it’ll just be simple emotions. Contentment. Distress. Things like that.”
“But they can’t now?”
“No, it's too early for them. Their telepathic powers aren’t developed enough,” he said, opening his eyes and looking up at her. His blue eyes were warm, like a cloudless summer day and Rose had never imagined ever seeing such love reflected in anyone. “But nobody knows when they can start receiving simple emotions. I want them know love the moment they’re able to feel it.”
“Will I really be able to feel it, even though I’m human?”
“I think so. You communicate with the TARDIS well enough. Seems that Bad Wolf left some lingering telepathic ability in you. Even if she didn’t, you should still be able to feel something from them, maybe just not as strongly.”
She kissed him impulsively, her lips pressing against his lightly.
“What’d I do to deserve that?”
“Do I need a reason to kiss you?”
“Absolutely not.”
Rose raised her hand to the far side of his face. She traced him, first running a fingertip down the shell of his ear then his jawline. She used her fingers to draw the angles of his face, feeling the stubble beneath her digits, biting her lip for a moment at the sandpapery feel of his face. Her gaze held his until he closed his eyes again and turned a bit to kiss the palm of her hand, and she smiled. He smiled back and dropped a light kiss to her nose.
“You can do that anytime you like, too,” he purred.
She giggled and gave him another quick kiss. “You’re such a sap.”
“Don’t tell anyone.”
“That would be terrible, wouldn’t it? The Oncoming Cuddle, or maybe The Oncoming Teddy Bear.”
“Oi!”
She giggled again, then covered his hands, still resting on her belly, with her own, lacing their fingers.
“Doctor, how similar are human and Gallifreyan pregnancies?”
“Quite similar, actually, despite the difference in gestation. The babies will develop at about the same rate a human baby would, but because the gestation is longer it’ll take longer. So being thirteen months pregnant with the babies will be just like being nine months pregnant if they were human.”
She sighed. “I’m going to be huge.”
“Actually, that’s another difference. Time Lord babies are a bit smaller, usually no more than 7 pounds. Given that they’re twins, I would assume they’re probably going to be a bit smaller, yet.”
“I’m only thirteen weeks and I’m already showing, Doctor.”
“Lots of women show early. Especially with twins.”
“According to the book, they’re about the size of limes right now. That is, they would be if they were human.”
“Yes, they are about that size,” the Doctor acknowledged, still looking at their joined hands. “Their growth rate won’t slow down until the seventh month or so. Until then, they develop like humans. After that, it’ll be mostly mental development since quite a lot of the physical will be complete.”
“That’s a relief, then. I was worried I would grow and grow and grow until I popped. And I’m growing faster than I ever thought. My mate Ginger didn’t show at all until she was almost five months along.”
“Well, you’ve got twins and are not Ginger.”
“No, I’m certainly not,” she grinned, raising her index finger to capture one of his. “I escaped.”
“Rose, we need to talk.”
“I don’t like the sound of that.”
“It’s not bad, really,” he reassured.
“Go on, then.”
“I think we should park the TARDIS in a few weeks.”
“Yep. I knew I wasn’t going to like it,” she muttered.
“Hear me out. There are things we need to do, and we’ll need time to do them.”
“Like what?”
“Well, as much as I love and am capable of taking care of you, I want to get you in with an Earth doctor at some point.”
“We can’t do that. The babies are Time Lords!” her voice and body tensed in alarm, “They’d be taken away!”
“Not if we work with UNIT. Have I ever told you about my time with UNIT?” Rose shook her head and he drew soothing circles over her faint bump. “The Time Lords banished me to Earth for a time. I took up in London and ended up working for a group called UNIT. They’re a secret organization that deals with aliens. My expertise was dead useful, and they would call me to help them with certain issues.
“But UNIT has a medical team, doctors of their own. One of them should at least consult with me and deliver the babies, because I’m not going to be able to be objective. I know it, and that could be dangerous.”
“So you don’t want to take care of me?”
“That’s not it. I’ll still be with you every day and see to your needs. It’s just that a UNIT doctor would not only be familiar with my biology, they’d not be frightened by Time Lord babies.”
Rose nodded. “I suppose that makes sense. How much control will we have over who the doctor is?”
“There will be several doctors, but probably not a lot of obstetricians.”
“If it’s not going to be you, I want it to be a woman. I’d just feel more comfortable that way.”
“Not a problem. There are quite a lot of doctors who work for UNIT, and if they don’t already have one, they’ll bring one in for us.”
“Good.”
“But we should get in with them soon. You’re fine; you and the babies are perfectly healthy, but you should have a chance to get to know the doctor who will be delivering the babies and they should get to know you, so that everyone is comfortable when the time comes.”
“Makes sense.”
“Now, on to the next order of business…”
“We were done with the last one?” Rose grinned.
He smiled against her cheek, then planted a light kiss on it. “It all ties in together. Honest.”
“Alright.”
“I know you’re going to try to sweet-talk your way into staying on the run longer, but you’re not going to talk me out of parking the TARDIS in a few weeks.”
Rose snapped at him, her body tensing again. ”We don’t need to. This is ridiculous. I’m barely showing yet, only a little bump!” Tears, her frequent and almost always unexpected companion, welled in her eyes.
“I know that,” he soothed.
“I’m sorry. I just don’t feel like myself lately, cryin’ all the time. But I can still run, Doctor. I won’t take any unnecessary risks, I promise. I just don’t want to stop yet.” Tears flowed, and the Doctor released his hand from under hers to wipe them away.
“You’re fine, love. It’s normal for hormones to make you feel off-kilter. But like I said,” he switched back to the previous topic, “we’re going to need time to prepare for the babies.” When he noticed Rose was preparing to argue her point again, he diverted her with a fresh tidbit of information. “Get used to our house, all of that.”
Rose narrowed her eyes. “You have a house?”
“Aye, in Kent.”
“I never knew that!”
He shrugged. “I rarely go there, which is one reason why we should park soon. It’ll be in need of renovations, and I’d like to get them out of the way before you start to feel unwieldy. You’re going to be obviously pregnant in a few short weeks, and I want to park shortly after.
“Which brings me to my third point. You’ve been harping about telling your mum.” He let out a little oof when she elbowed him, then continued. “And despite the obvious dangers to myself, I think it’s time.”
Rose groaned and the Doctor pulled her close again. “I’ve been thinking... do we really have to tell my Mum? Can’t we just show up with the babies?”
He chuckled against her hair. “That is a risk to my person I’m definitely not willing to take. Can you imagine her reaction if we didn’t let her be a part of this pregnancy?” Rose didn’t answer. “Don’t you think your mum is going to want to be in on everything?”
“I know she will. I just don’t want to hear her yell at me. Right scary, she is, when she’s cross. And I really hate disappointing her,” Rose said in a quiet voice.
“I don’t think she’ll be disappointed long, love. Nor do I think she’ll yell - at least she won’t yell at you. I won’t let her.”
“I’m less worried about her being angry, to be honest. I’m more worried she’ll just be disappointed and ashamed.” Tears splashed her cheeks again.
“I don’t think she will, love. She won’t be thrilled at first, I’m sure, but she won’t be mad at you.”
“I won’t let her yell at you, either,” Rose vowed.
“If she does, that’s alright. She’s a right to be angry at me. I got her only child pregnant with twins. But I don’t think she will, really.”
“How can you know that?” Rose demanded.
The Doctor shrugged. “Just a hunch I have. We need to tell her soon, though. Your anxiety about it isn’t healthy.”
Rose sighed heavily. “Fine, we’ll tell her. Just give me a few more weeks, yeah?”
“Days. I think we should tell her sometime in the next week or so before she figures it out on her own.”
“Why? Why are you pushing this?”
“Because I’m anxious to get it out of the way, to no longer have it hanging over our heads. Besides, Rose, the babies are about to have a growth spurt, and your body will reflect that.”
“Meaning I’m about to get fat.” She sighed at his withering look. “Alright, fine. We’re supposed to go there in a couple of days, right?”
“We can go right now if you want.”
“No, ta. I still want her to have more time to get used to the idea of us.”
“Alright, how about this. Over the next week, we’ll visit Jackie two or three times, but we’ll space it out in her timeline so that we’re still visiting every couple of weeks. And then we’ll tell her a week from today before you start showing so much she notices on her own.”
“When will it be in her timeline if we do that?”
“June.”
“That’ll be six months in her timeline that she’ll have known about us. I think that’ll be okay.”
“And we’ll contact UNIT while we’re there, and maybe get started on the house?”
“Sure.”
“You can renovate and redecorate any way you like, Rose. Don’t worry about the money, I’ll handle it.”
Rose scoffed. “You’ll handle it, eh? As I recall, I paid for our first date.”
“Oi! That was over a year ago!”
Rose touched her tongue to her teeth. “I’ll never forget it, though, Doctor.”
He nuzzled into her ear. “Nor will I.”
“So back to you ‘handling’ all the costs of everything...that’s a lot of money we’re talking about, Doctor. What, are you a billionaire or something?”
“Nah, I don’t think so, but I’ve been on the UNIT payroll for thirty Earth years or so. All of that money has been deposited into an Earth bank, gathering interest.”
Rose furrowed her brows. “Just how much money are we talking, Doctor?”
He grinned and tapped his nose. “Enough that you don’t have to worry about doing whatever you want to the house.”
“Blimey.”
“So are we agreed? We’ll land in one week to tell your mother and start renovations on the house?”
“I don’t like it. The parking.”
“Tell you what, we’ll compromise. We probably won’t go out into the stars after a few weeks, but we’ll still travel until it gets uncomfortable for you. I’ll take you anywhere on Earth you want to go, as long as we stay in your timeline.”
She twisted her body to look at him. “Do you mean it?”
“Aye.”
“Thank you!” She threw her arms around his neck. He brought his hands up to circle around her. “We’ll have to park in your Mum’s flat sometimes for a few days while the house is being repaired, you understand. And I’m going to be making you take a few days off to rest between trips.”
Rose could live with that, and told him so.
“Good.” He tilted his head down and kissed her, soft but thorough, before pulling back and kissing the tip of her nose. “There’s one more thing I wanted to talk to you about.”
Rose sighed and turned back around, settling back between his legs. “Go on, then.”
She could hear the smile in his voice when he put one hand over her belly. The other, he laced through her fingers. “S’not bad. I think you may like it.”
She waited for a second for him to go on, then prompted him. “Well?”
“Have I told you about Time Lord or Gallifreyan marriage?”
“You’ve mentioned it a time or two, but not gone into any great detail.”
“Well, I need to rectify that, because I don’t just want to marry you in Earth’s traditions.”
“Okay,” she said with finality.
He twisted his head to look at her. “I wasn’t finished.”
“Doesn’t matter. You don’t need to ask.”
“Still gonna. But not askin’ yet, me. Got plans. I just wanted to talk to you about Gallifreyan marriage.”
“Ugh. Are you ever going to ask me, or just keep talkin’ about it until your chin falls off?”
He chuckled and nuzzled into her neck. “Cheeky.”
“Go on, then. Tell me about this marriage I’ll automatically agree to.”
The Doctor chuckled again, then started talking. “There’s two stages to bonding. First comes the handfasting, then the actual bond comes nine months later.”
“Nine months? Seems like an odd increment of time.”
“Well, in Gallifrey nine months is a year.”
“Gotcha. So what is handfasting and what is bonding?”
“Handfasting is pledging yourself to your mate for the specified period of time. It involves telepathy, and if the two people want to deepen their telepathic link and bond for life when those nine months are up, they’re free to do so. The handfasting lasts for two Gallifreyan years, or eighteen months for you. The couple can bond any time after the nine month mark is up, until the bond expires.”
“So it’s like an engagement.”
The Doctor shrugged. “I guess that’s the equivalent in your society, although there’s no telepathic linking in your human engagements.”
“What’s the bonding like?”
“Well, you and I would form a link between the two of us. You know I’m a touch telepath, but this’d be unique to you and me.”
“What’s that mean, though?”
“You and I would be able to communicate with each other through touch. We wouldn’t need to speak aloud if we’re touching.”
“You’ll be able to see my thoughts?”
“Not exactly. Only if you want me to. I’d going to teach you to strengthen your telepathic walls, so to speak, so I wouldntn’t be reading your mind. We would be able to interpret each other’s emotions, though, just by touch.”
“Am I going to be capable of that?” she asked, a bit awestruck.
“Yes, I’m nearly certain. Bad Wolf left you with some latent telepathic abilities, and we can use those to form the bond. If that’s what you want.”
“What happens after the handfasting period is up?”
“Well, if you choose to accept me as your Bondmate, we’ll have a bonding ceremony and the bond will become permanent and stronger. We’ll be able to sense each other’s emotions even without touching. But Rose, the bond is permanent. There is no going back if we fully bond.”
She shrugged. “Okay.”
“Just like that?” He sounded astonished.
“Just like that. Whenever you’re ready.”
“Not yet. Got a plan, me,” he said, chuffed. “But soon.”
Notes:
Thank you guys for reading. So much. <3 Your comments are the best and so, so encouraging.
My dad's surgery is tomorrow. I have the next few chapters written and (mostly) edited, so it shouldn't disrupt the posting schedule much, if at all. I appreciate all the warm wishes you guys have sent me. :)
Got some great suggestions for baby names, I'm almost certain about one, but I welcome more! Can't tell you the babies' sex(es) yet, so send 'em in for both boys and girls! :)
Once again, tenroseforeverandever is my beta, and she's everything a beta should be. Thank you, darlin'.
Chapter 14: Telling Jackie
Summary:
Jackie turned to give Rose her mug.
“Ta, Mum.”
“Where do you want to sit?” Jackie asked.
“What do you mean?”
“When you tell me that you’re pregnant. Where do you want to sit?”Rose and the Doctor tell Jackie that she's going to be a grandmother twice over, then go to check out their new home.
Notes:
Well here we are, the moment some of you have been waiting for! Hopefully, it lives up to your expectations...or maybe surprises you (in a good way!)
I'm thinking that we're at about the halfway point of this fic with this chapter. Good stuff coming up!
As always, this fic would not be happening were it not for tenroseforeverandever. <3
Thanks for reading!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
In the end, Rose decided that she wanted to tell her mum on her own. The Doctor was not in favor of this idea; he worried that Jackie would cause Rose further anxiety. Rose reasoned that no matter what her mother did, it couldn’t be any more stressful than the fear of it. The Doctor grudgingly saw the logic in this and agreed, but told Rose to keep her phone handy in case she needed a rescue.
And that’s how Rose found herself in her mum’s kitchen, leaning against the counter while her mum made tea. Jackie turned to give Rose her mug.
“Ta, Mum.”
“Where do you want to sit?” Jackie asked.
“What do you mean?”
“When you tell me that you’re pregnant. Where do you want to sit?”
Rose gave a tinkering, false laugh. “What on Earth, Mum! Why would you think that?”
“Because I’m not stupid, Rose, and I’d appreciate it if you didn’t treat me like I am.”
Rose put her mug down and sagged against the counter.
“I am pregnant. You’re right. We got pregnant.”
“I thought you said it couldn’t happen!”
“It wasn’t supposed to!” Rose protested.
“Then how-”
“When I went back for him. The Time Vortex did something to my body, and now I’m pregnant.”
Jackie took a long breath before she went on. “Alright, then. We’ve got some talking to do, and I’ll want to be talking to himself, too. Does he know?"
"'Course he does, Mum!"
"Where is he?”
“In the TARDIS. I made him stay there, I wanted to tell you by myself.”
Jackie was quiet for a second, then asked in a low voice, “Are you happy, Rose?”
“I am, Mum. I really am. So’s he.”
“Is he going to take care of you?”
“He pampers me, Mum. Spoiling me rotten, he is.” Rose’s face crumpled and she started to cry.
Jackie didn’t hesitate, just rushed to her daughter and took her into her arms. “S’alright love. Tell me about it.”
“I just thought you’d be so cross,” she cried into her Mum’s shoulder.
“M’not cross. M’not sure I’m happy, but M’not cross.”
“I was so scared, Mum. I still am, some.”
“Scared of what?”
“Of being a mum.”
“C’mere.” Jackie took her hand and led her to the lounge, sitting beside her on the couch and turning towards her. “Call himself up here. I’ll have some questions for him, too.”
“Don’t slap him, Mum,” Rose warned, having pulled herself together a bit.
“I won’t. I should, but I won’t.”
Rose nodded and pulled out her phone.
~*~O~*~
The Doctor arrived less than three minutes later. He knocked on the door instead of just walking right in as had become his custom, and Rose went to the door to answer it.
“How is she?” He kept his voice quiet, grimacing.
“Not cross, really. Just wants to talk to both of us.”
“S’fair enough, I suppose.”
“Oi! You two get in here where I can talk to you,” Jackie called from the lounge.
The Doctor raised an eyebrow at Rose. “Thought you said she’s not cross?”
“She’s not. That’s just her, you know that.”
“Right.” He leaned down and gave her a quick kiss. “Let’s do this, then.”
The two of them walked into the lounge, hand in hand, and sat on the couch. Jackie had moved to the armchair across from them.
“So you got my daughter up the duff after all, eh?” Jackie said with a stern look.
“Wasn’t intentional, Jackie,” the Doctor replied. “And she’s not ‘up the duff’, she’s pregnant.”
“You’re sticking around?” Jackie asked.
The Doctor looked affronted. “‘Course I am! This is my family.”
Jackie sighed. “How far along are you?”
“Fourteen weeks,” Rose answered.
“Fourteen weeks and two days,” the Doctor nitpicked.
Jackie fixed him with a look. “You’re proud, are you?”
“Very.”
“We’re happy, Mum. This isn’t something we planned for or anything, and we haven’t been together long, but we’re happy nonetheless.”
“Well, what are you going to do?”
Rose opened her mouth, but Jackie was looking at the Doctor so she closed it.
The Doctor answered. “We’re parking for a while. Going linear, probably in a month or so. Rose still wants to travel, but I think we’re going to be done with hopping through time and space for a bit. Maybe we’ll still travel around,” Rose gave him a speculative look, “but we won’t leave Earth. While we’re here now, though, on this trip, we’re going to set about renovating my house.”
“You have a house?” Jackie questioned.
“Aye. In Kent. Not so far away.”
“Is it going to be big enough?”
He nodded. “Plenty big.”
Jackie sighed. “How will you live? Rose? You’ll be going back to work at Henrik’s, yeah?”
She shook her head. “Doctor’s got a job.”
Jackie cocked an eyebrow at him. “That so?”
“I’m a consultant for a government agency that deals with extraterrestrial matters. Have been since the ‘70’s. We’re going to see a doctor there about taking care of Rose.”
“You’re not gonna do it?”
“I can’t be objective about my family, Jackie.”
“Fair point, I s’pose.” She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose, then looked at them. “I reckon I’m happy for you. I think it just needs to sink in.”
“How did you know, Mum?”
“Lotsa ways. You wouldn’t drink any wine with dinner, your boobs were bigger,” the Doctor hid a smirk at this, “and your clothes have been baggy the last few times you visited. Which reminds me - shirt up. Let’s see what you look like.”
Rose looked at the Doctor uncertainly, then stood up and pulled her shirt up a bit. She put her hand on her belly protectively.”M’not so big just yet, but I’ll be getting huge before long.”
Jackie leaned up and put her own hand on Rose’s belly and Rose smiled. “I just can’t believe my baby is havin’ a baby.” Jackie removed her hands and sat back in her armchair.
“Babies,” the Doctor supplied with a grin.
Rose adjusted her shirt and sat down.
“Babies?” Jackie looked from the Doctor to Rose. “You havin’ a litter?”
“Oi!” Rose protested, but Jackie grinned and the Doctor barked a laugh. Rose swatted him and he gave her a cheeky grin before looking back at Jackie. “S’not a litter. S’twins.”
“Twins!” Jackie said. “Identical?”
“Nah,” the Doctor said. “Fraternal.”
“Boys or girls?”
“We don’t know.” Rose sidled up to the Doctor on the couch and he put his arm around her, casually draping it across her shoulders. Rose brought her hand up to her shoulder and linked their fingers together.
“S’alien babies, I assume.”
Rose felt the Doctor stiffen a little for just a moment, then he relaxed again. “The babies will be Time Lords, like me. But they’ll have some human characteristics. I think.”
“You think?”
“They’ll definitely look human, but they have two hearts, like me. There’s a lot that’s unknown, Jackie. These waters are a bit uncharted.”
“Will they live 900 years, too?”
“Time Lords are nigh immortal, and I don’t know,” he said. “I’ll have to do some tests on them after they’re born to figure out just how much human they have in them.”
“S’not half and half?”
“No. My Time Lord genes were dominant, but there will be some recessive human traits.”
Jackie looked back and forth between the two. “Sounds like you two have it all worked out.”
“Mum, don’t worry about us, alright? We’ve got money and a place to live. We love each other and the babies will have a happy home.”
“How can I not worry?” she demanded. “You’re my daughter, Rose, and you’re only twenty-one. Or are you twenty-two now? I never know with all the time-travelin’ you lot do.”
Rose didn’t answer. She wasn’t sure she knew, exactly. “You were only eighteen, and you did fine. Even without Dad.”
Jackie couldn’t argue that, really. The Doctor looked chuffed by Jackie’s silence.
“Mum?” Rose asked tentatively.
“Yeah?”
“Are you happy at all?”
“M’scared, Rose. You’re my baby, and now you’re having alien twins.”
“The babies are not going to be very different from human babies at all, Jackie. They’re healthy, Rose is healthy, and I’m going to do everything in my power and use every bit of influence I have to keep them that way.”
“You see that you do, or I’ll be giving you a slap.”
~*~O~*~
Jackie wasn’t working the next day, so the Doctor agreed to stick around and take them all to his property in Kent. Rose talked her into traveling via TARDIS by offering to show her around the ship. The Doctor and Jack followed the women to the galley, then stayed there while Rose showed her mum around the library, gardens, and pool.
“S’my room, Mum,” Rose said, opening the door and letting Jackie in.
“Blimey,” Jackie breathed. “S’bigger than the flat.”
Rose nodded. “The TARDIS has been pampering me almost as much as the Doctor. She’s installed stairs leading up to the bathtub and stairs descending into the water, with a rail for me to hold on to. Reckon she’s scared I’ll fall.”
“You have a bathtub that requires stairs?”
Rose nodded happily. “And the biggest closet you ever saw. Come and see.”
“Blimey,” Jackie said again, stepping inside the huge closet. Rose gave her mother a bright smile.
“Brilliant, isn’t it? Here, you sit while I get dressed.” She indicated the chair near the door and Jackie sat.
“This is all yours? The room, the closet, the loo?”
“Well, it was all mine, but now the Doctor has moved in with me,” Rose said, grateful her mother couldn’t see her face. “She just moved all of his stuff in last week.”
“The TARDIS did that for you?”
“Told you, she’s pampering me. I sleep better if the Doctor is nearby. It soothes me, but I think it soothes the babies, too.” She slid racks around quickly, looking through her clothes.
“Why’re you changin’ your clothes?”
“I’ve been wearing baggy clothes to try to keep everything...you know. Quiet. But blimey, it’s going to feel good to wear clothes that aren’t sacks. Maybe even feel cute.”
“You really love him, don’t you?” Jackie asked from nowhere, changing the subject.
Rose peeked out from behind the racks she was in. “‘Course I do, Mum.”
Jackie shook her head. “I’m more talking to myself than anything, here. I just mean, you’ve actually found the one. The one that matches you.”
“I did,” Rose smiled.
“I always knew you would someday, but I hoped it would be Mickey or someone who would keep you close to home. Even after you started travelin’, I hoped it wouldn’t be the Doctor.” Jackie’s eyes shone with tears, then a drop trickled down each cheek. “He’s gonna take you away from me again, and I’ll never see you or my grandbabies.”
Rose went to her mother and squatted on her heels front of her. “Hey, Mum, listen. It’s not like that. In fact, it’s the opposite, yeah? We’re going to be coming home more often now with the babies, and the Doctor sounds like he wants to keep up the house in Kent so we’ve always got a home to come to.”
Jackie sniffled again and Rose shifted onto her knees, leaning in to hug her mother tight, hormonal, empathetic tears streaking her own face. “These babies are a good thing, Mum. All the way around.”
“You’ve never gotten to live, Rose. You’re still just so young...I wanted more for you…”
“More than travelling the stars, meeting the man of my dreams, falling in love, and now having grandbabies for you to spoil?”
Jackie huffed a watery laugh. “Well, when you put it that way…”
Rose sat back onto her haunches and Jackie wiped her mascara-streaked cheeks. Rose smiled, rose up and hugged her mother again.
~*~O~*~
When the TARDIS landed, Rose tried repeatedly to coax her mother into letting go of the coral strut she was clinging to. In the end, it took all of Jack’s considerable charm to convince her to let go.
They went to the doors, and the Doctor opened up and stepped out. “Garden’s a bit overgrown. We’ll need to get a gardener as well, I s’pose.”
Rose stepped out behind him and her jaw dropped. “Doctor. This is…”
“Blimey,” Jackie breathed from behind her.
Jack whistled low. “This is impressive, Doctor.”
“Welcome to Smithwood Manor,” he said proudly.
Rose stared up at the back of the huge house in shock. "Huge" didn't quite do the house justice. It was...it was enormous. The Doctor had told her that it would be big enough for everyone, but she never expected it to be so...impressive. The exterior was rough-cut stones covered in places by ivy, which added to the building's charm. Large windows twinkled from all over the house and multiple chimneys jutted up from the slate roof. Looking to her right, there was another, slightly smaller building, not quite as decorative.
"Used to be stables," the Doctor volunteered, following her gaze. "Now it's a garage."
“Doctor,” Rose tugged on his hand. “Are you sure we’re at the right place?”
“Course I’m sure!”
“This is...this is a mansion,” Rose said.
“Rose, we’ve stayed in palaces before. This is nowhere near as grand as most of the places we’ve been,” the Doctor said.
“Yeah, but I wasn’t going to live in those places.”
“You’ve got your work cut out for you; I haven’t been in this house in a long time, I’m sure it needs repairs.”
“Well let’s get to it, then!” Jack said.
~*~O~*~
The Doctor had called a contractor to meet them so that renovations could be ordered. They met the man and his assistant in the front drive; the Doctor was pleased to see the contractor already giving directions and the assistant making notes.
It didn’t take Rose or Jackie long to recover from the shock of the Doctor owning a manor, although she was surprised to learn that there were wings of rooms. They both set about twirling all through the house and discussing what needed to be done where. They quickly picked out a nursery, adjacent to the master bedroom. At one point the manor had been the home of nobility that slept in separate, connecting rooms. This served Rose’s purpose for a nursery well, and she was grateful.
Jackie had made it known that she intended to stay with Rose for a while after the babies were born, and the Doctor had done his best to look pleased with this announcement. Jackie tried to claim a room as her own that was entirely too close to the master bedroom for his liking, and he steered her towards another suite of rooms further down the hall. Upon seeing the size and beauty of the rooms she'd been offered, Jackie relented her in quest to have the closest possible room to the babies and Rose.
There was a large, roomy space over the garage that the Doctor offered to have converted into a flat for Jack. He happily accepted.
Most of the house had been decorated in jewel tones with elegant, Victorian furniture. Rose told the Doctor it was all quite beautiful, but she wanted the house to be a home, too. To that end, the group began picking rooms to leave as they were, with an eye towards the others being refurbished and decorated the way Rose wanted.
The kitchen was outdated and in need of an overhaul. Jackie took control there, pointing to repairs she saw that needed to be made, deciding on updates in appliances and machinery, and discussing materials for countertops and backsplashes with the contractor’s assistant and Rose. The Doctor waited for Rose to shut her mother down, but she seemed to be excited about her mum’s input.
Rose and Jackie moved on around the house with the contractor’s assistant, discussing gods-only-knew-what. The Doctor took a seat in his library (which was being left untouched, thank Rassilon) with Jack and the contractor.
“How soon do you think the repairs can be made?” the Doctor asked, pouring everyone a glass of scotch.
“We could get started as soon as Monday, but it will take quite a while to do the extensive work. Several months.”
“I’m expecting twins soon,” the Doctor indicated, “and my… Rose won’t be in any shape to deal with renovations in an advanced state of pregnancy.”
The contractor nodded and opened his mouth to speak, but Jack took a sip of his scotch and set his drink down, cutting him off. “Doctor, if it’s alright with you, I’d like to do the construction of my flat last, to make sure that Rose can be settled sooner rather than later.”
“Good thinking, Jack.” He looked back at the contractor. “Does that help?”
“A bit, yes, but it will probably only shorten the duration of the work by a couple of weeks.”
“What if I told you money's no object?”
The contractor smiled. “All due respect, sir, but many people say that, but none ever actually mean it.”
“It’s ‘Doctor’, and I do. I want this house habitable in six weeks. I’d like for Rose to be able to meet with a decorator and gardener in four weeks. I’ll gladly pay a deposit today, if you like.”
“That will speed things along, yes.” The contractor looked a bit gobsmacked.
“Good. Let me know the amount, and I’ll pay half up front.”
“Yes, sir.”
The men talked about specific repairs and speculated about what Rose would want while they waited for the women to be done. When a nearly giddy Jackie and Rose found them in the library, the Doctor smiled. A Rose who was happy with her living space would be less likely to want to wander the stars, and, to his mind, that was a good thing right now.
The Doctor narrowed his eyes when he noticed the way the contractor’s assistant’s eyes kept going to Rose’s belly. Concern nibbled at his mind, but he brushed it away. Surely the assistant was just surprised by he and Rose being a couple; he looked quite a bit older than she did, after all, and she was incredibly beautiful. And he was...well, he was not. Made sense for people to wonder about them. Still, the assistant’s frequent looks at Rose’s midsection were unsettling and he resolved to tell Jack and keep a closer eye on her.
The foursome waited until the contractors were gone before loading into the TARDIS and dematerializing. Jackie didn’t grab a coral strut this time, she was too involved in excited chatter with Rose.
~*~O~*~
“Get everything settled, then?”
Rose slipped her arms around the Doctor’s waist in the lounge of Jackie’s flat when he came back from UNIT. He bent his head and kissed her hair.
“All done. I made myself available for consultation, and left my number with a trusted friend there. Kate was quite surprised that I’d be settling down on Earth again.”
“Kate?”
“Chief Scientific Officer. She’s a friend. Her father was a very old friend.”
“Ah. Well, what did you tell her?”
“That I was expecting twins with the most beautiful woman in all of time and space, who also just happened to be a human from London.”
Rose glowed under the praise, and her tongue touched her teeth for a moment. “And she accepted that?”
“Nothing to accept, really. It’s fact.”
Rose tensed a little and brought one hand down to her belly. “You told them about the babies.”
“Just told you I did.”
“Are they going to want to take them away?”
“No. Kate would never dare, and since she’s in charge, I’m not concerned.” He kissed her hair again. “Don’t worry, Rose. I’m not going to let anything happen to you or the babies.”
Notes:
I'm currently writing chapter 17, and have hit a spot of writer's block. I know what I want to say, but it won't translate to the page. Send juju for a bolt of lightning/inspiration! Or just a kick in the pants. That'd work, too.
Thank you to everyone who sent warm wishes or asked after my dad. The surgery went well, and now it's just about healing. :)
Coming soon: a spot of domestics before we get back to adventuring
Chapter 15: Fifth Time's the Charm
Summary:
It wouldn't be the Doctor if everything went according to plan.
Chapter Text
*~*~*Seventeen Weeks*~*~*
There was no longer any denying that Rose was pregnant. Not that she wanted to, really, but...well, she was obviously pregnant now. Jack had earned more than a few dirty looks from her when he made comments about taping mixing bowls to his belly so they could be twins.
The Doctor offered to make some of her clothes bigger on the inside and she swatted his shoulder for it. A few seconds later, she was tearfully asking him if he was ashamed of her being pregnant. He stared at her, nonplussed, then she curled herself into his lap and wept. She babbled, telling him that she was sorry, that her hormones had gotten the better of her again. The poor, bemused Doctor just tucked her against his chest and rubbed soothing circles over her back.
Seeing the changes in Rose’s body prompted the Doctor and Rose to further negotiate their traveling compromise. Rose wanted to travel until she was waddling, but the Doctor wouldn’t have it. He wanted to take one more trip, then park. After much deliberation, many tears on Rose’s part and a couple of heated rows, the Doctor had offered to take Rose out into the stars for two more weeks, until she hit the seventeen week mark. He insisted that when the time came, they would be sticking around Earth until after the babies arrived. Rose eventually relented, not all that happy about the arrangement and making her displeasure known.
The Doctor didn’t like that she was unhappy, but made it clear that he wouldn’t be bending once they landed. He had never been able to say no to her in their entire relationship, even before they were lovers. He was firm on this point though, citing his own increasing concerns about her being in dangerous situations and imploring her to understand that his anxiety was starting to overwhelm him.
By the time she hit that seventeen week mark, though, she could see the Doctor’s point. She wasn’t waddling, but her center of gravity was shifting. She began to be afraid that if she was asked to run suddenly, she might tumble and fall. When she sheepishly told the Doctor she was ready to park like he’d wanted, he took her on ‘one last trip’ to her favorite marketplace. Rose bought a couple of flowing dresses that she thought would be comfortable, and the three of them stocked up on things they thought they would miss while earthbound, including the Doctor’s favorite tea, Rose’s favorite fruits to put in the galley’s stasis closet, and two boxes of mechanical parts for the Doctor and Jack to tinker on.
Jackie had made a place in Rose’s old room to park the TARDIS while they were waiting for the house to be ready, and it was there that they landed at seventeen weeks and four days when Rose finally conceded to coming to Earth in her timeline and staying there.
There was a lot to do, however, and Rose found herself not missing the alien planets as much as she thought she would. The TARDIS was still their home for now, and the two of them could lie in bed together and look up at the stars she provided them as a canopy.
I can do this, she said, talking down her wanderlust. Stuck on Earth with the Doctor, s’not so bad.
~*~O~*~
The Doctor had been exercising his frankly magnificent mind, putting it to good use.
He’d wanted to give Rose a traditional human courtship, despite being a different species from another planet, himself. Gallifreyan rites and rituals were very different, but Rose had offered to handfast and bond with him in Gallifreyan tradition - he figured the least he could do was honor her culture and traditions, in return.
He already had the ring. He’d had it since before their first kiss. He had bought it on impulse at the same time as he bought the necklace she wore her TARDIS key on. He hadn’t been able to explain the purchase to himself at the time; he still didn’t fully understand what had inspired him to buy it. Maybe it was future memory, maybe premonition. He didn’t know. Didn’t really matter in the end: it had been a good purchase, and all the times he’d told himself that he was a fool for buying it, that she would never accept him, she would never wear it were about to be proven or disproven. He rather thought it would be the latter.
The Doctor took the ring out of his pocket from time to time to examine it and reassure himself that she would like it. Every time he did, he was chuffed with himself for such a magnificent purchase. It was stunning and he was sure she’d be pleased.
The ‘when’ to propose hadn’t been all that difficult to decide. He wanted to ask her to marry him before she had the babies, of course, and would marry her in her tradition whenever she was ready. He knew without asking that Jackie would want a grand wedding, and the Doctor wanted Rose to have that, as well, if she wanted. He didn’t expect that she would want to do so while they were pregnant. That was fine. He’d be ready when and where she wanted.
The important thing just now was to ask her. He’d studied early 21st-century customs and although he knew it was socially acceptable for couples to have children without being married, it was slightly more acceptable if there was some tangible proof of commitment. Rose would be less likely to be barraged with questions about whether he was going to leave her with the babies once they came if she had the socially accepted proof of his commitment to her; it may spare her from questions and comments she wouldn’t appreciate, that would make her uncomfortable.
Well, some of the questions and comments. He knew that the matter of his outward appearance would likely still earn smirking remarks and gossip. She didn’t seem to care, and there was nothing he could do about it. He wished he was young and pretty for her, someone she could be proud to show off to her friends. Still, Rose never seemed to mind how he looked - even told him how handsome she thought he was. He thought she was barmy, really, but appreciated the sentiment.
Regardless of the inequality in their appearances and even if she didn’t want to marry him until after the babies were born - or later - he wanted to ask her right away, now that they were residents of Earth. He wanted to do the thing properly. They had all the time in the cosmos for him to make her his wife in the tradition and by the laws of Earth. He could wait on that. But he wanted to prove his commitment to her and everyone they encountered.
On the other hand, he wanted to bond with her in Time Lord tradition as soon as possible. Since she had offered, it was almost all he could think about. The silence in his mind would be vanquished by his little pink-and-yellow girl whenever they touched, and he couldn’t wait. She would glow within his mind.
Yes, he was ready to bond with Rose Tyler any time now. Yesterday would be great.
He was certainly eager to commit to her, but his eagerness didn’t exactly get anything done. It didn’t settle the question of exactly when, where, and how he should do it. He contemplated all of the places on Earth that would be appropriate, places that were considered romantic or held special significance to them, but ruled each one out. He didn’t think any of them were good enough.
He thought about reversing his earlier stance and taking her on one last trip, just one more, maybe somewhere they had previously visited. He considered taking her to Women Wept, but realized it would be a bit more difficult to give her the ring if she had her hand bundled up in gloves and mittens. He thought about Justicia, but she hadn’t been thoroughly impressed there. And he wanted her to be thoroughly impressed whether she decided to accept him or not. He considered Midnight or some other pleasure planet, as he ran through safe, luxurious, and impressive options in his mind. Finally he settled on an idea.
The decision of timing and location made, he was faced with another problem: he had no idea what to say. Previous incarnations had had much more of a way with words, some were even a bit poetic. Not this body, though. He wasn’t always so good with expressing his thoughts and feelings, especially under pressure, and he felt the pressure.
The Doctor practiced multiple proposals. He tried the flowery approach, but that just wasn’t him. He planned out a logical list of reasons that she should marry him, but he doubted she’d like that too much. He considered educating her on the history of human marriage, but decided that could wait for another time.
The Doctor considered and dismissed multiple proposal speeches until he finally settled on something he thought might not be too bad. He was rather proud of himself for coming up with something so clever. Impressive, he was.
Two days after they’d landed and the Doctor had announced they were going to be staying on Earth for the duration, he pulled Jack aside and told him that he was taking Rose out into the stars for a bit. He tugged a surprised Rose into the TARDIS, not telling her where they were going as they took off, determined not to come home without Rose Tyler as his bride and bondmate.
~*~O~*~
He landed on Earth, in the flat, twenty-four hours later with Rose neither his bride nor bondmate.
He had taken her to Natale, a pleasure planet with beautiful scenery, romantic restaurants, and several resorts that were dedicated to pampering pregnant women. It was at one of these beach-front resorts that he had landed in the morning, intending for Rose to spend a long day of luxury, being spoiled beyond belief, then joining him for dinner and a romantic stroll on the beach where he would propose. Then they would leave the next morning, engaged, possibly handfasted, and blissfully happy. Simple. So easy an ood could do it.
Rose had been thrilled when they landed, squealing and jumping into his arms, kissing him soundly. He’d had to push her away, sending her to begin her day of indulgence in whatever made her feel good... before he set about trying to make her feel good on his own without leaving their bedroom.
He took her to the reception area, told them to spare no expense, and to give her anything and everything she wanted. Then he went back to the TARDIS to pace.
When Rose came back to the TARDIS an eternity of hours later, relaxed and glowing, he’d directed her to her room, telling her that the TARDIS had already picked out something special for her to wear. She came back to the console room dressed in a v-neck butter-yellow maxidress that skirted her sandaled feet. The waist gathered in a knot that rested just above her belly and her hair was loosely pinned on top of her head.
The Doctor stood, dumbstruck by her casual beauty and said nothing until she gave him her tongue-touched smile and pointed to his own clothing. Rose had referred to his usual outfit as armor multiple times, usually plucking at the sleeve of his leather jacket. Her eyes had always widened appreciatively anytime he took it off and dressed in something outside his norm. To that end, he dressed in clothes appropriate for a walk on the beach - khaki trousers and a loose-fitting white linen shirt. Maybe there had been something to what Rose had teased him about - maybe those clothes were armor for him. He certainly felt vulnerable without them. But wasn’t that the point? To lay himself bare to her and ask her to accept him?
It seemed to please her: Rose had bitten her lip on a grin when he finally got himself together and offered her his arm, then the two of them set out to dinner.
Dinner was lovely, but the Doctor’s anxiety about what he was about to do had been powerful. He told himself that she was sure to say yes - she’d all but said yes already, after all - but that didn’t allay his fears. He was about to ask her to commit to him for the rest of her life. She glowed, she was radiant, and he knew he didn’t deserve her. He steeled himself for their walk on the beach, rehearsing everything he would say to her in his attempt to convince her to be his for her forever.
He was sure he had it right by the time they finished dessert and he paid the check. Now the only thing to do was go out there and ask Rose to become his wife.
They stepped out onto the street... into pouring rain.
Rose laughed, letting go of the Doctor’s hand to spin around happily. He watched her, smiling indulgently, and telling himself that he had several backup plans. There was no reason for him to be so utterly disappointed.
~*~O~*~
He decided to propose to her at one of the many places around London that he’d dismissed before.
The first place he decided to take her was Henrik’s, thinking that they’d just slip down to the basement and he could ask her in the same place he’d taken her hand and told her to run. It seemed poetic to him - she’d run away with him that night in that basement, and now he was asking her to stay with him forever.
This would work.
He told Rose that he wanted to take her shopping since she’d been complaining she didn’t have enough to wear. Much to his dismay, Rose asked Jackie to come along with them, saying that she wanted a woman’s opinion on some maternity clothes she’d been looking at. Jackie was only too pleased to take the day off and spend it with Rose.
The Doctor sighed heavily, crossing his arms then telling Rose to go have fun with her mum.
He’d enact plan C, then.
~*~O~*~
Plan C was to take her to the chippie that was the site of their first ‘date’. The Doctor took her by the hand the next day, ring in pocket and palms sweating, and the two of them started marching to the chippie.
Unfortunately, the chippie was about four miles away and Rose didn’t have on the usual comfortable shoes that she wore on their adventures, perfect for long walks and running. She’d taken to wearing shoes that were much more aesthetic and much less athletic once they’d landed on earth, and the strappy sandals she wore then were not conducive to long walks. By the halfway mark, she announced that her feet were tired, her ankles were starting to swell, and she was ready for a break and oh, hey, look! A chippie.
The Doctor followed her into the little restaurant, trying very hard not to curse and rant at the poor people who worked there. They were not at all responsible for Rose’s lack of practical footwear. Instead, he pinched the bridge of his nose and cursed himself, his brain reminding him all of the sudden that there was a reason they had parked, and this was it.
On to Plan D.
~*~O~*~
The Doctor was agitated, and Rose had no idea what was wrong with him. He seemed edgy, somehow. Whenever she asked what was wrong, she was treated to a manic grin and assurances that there was nothing at all for her to be concerned about.
This didn’t stop Rose from being concerned.
He took her to another romantic dinner (she was really getting quite spoiled lately, she noted to herself), and the two of them started out, hand in hand, towards the Thames.
The Doctor said nothing as they walked, and she looked up to notice the clench of his jaw with concern. It was the look he got when he was facing a particularly tricky problem or tough foe, and it worried Rose more than a little.
“Doctor? What’s wrong?”
“Nothin’!” he said with false cheer. “Top o’ the world, me!”
“You seem...tense.”
“Do I?” He gave her a goofy grin and she was even more puzzled.
They reached the Thames a block away, and the two of them strolled slowly, fingers entwined. The Doctor started talking, lecturing her about the London Eye across the river and other landmarks.
After a bit, he came to a stop beside a railing and turned to her. The look in his eyes was intense, his jaw clenched on a forced smile, and Rose worried. He was going to break bad news to her, she just knew it. She took a deep breath and braced for the worst.
Taking a deep breath was a bad idea.
A fishing boat passed them, and the smell of dead fish wafted up to where they stood. Rose felt the tell-tale signs of impending nausea and let go of the Doctor’s hand, rushing to the nearest trash receptacle and emptying the contents of her stomach.
She wasn’t sure, but she thought she heard the Doctor cursing before he came to her and offered her a handkerchief. She took it gratefully.
~*~O~*~
Once Rose escaped the riverwalk and fishy smell, she felt instantly better, but they decided to take a cab back to the council estate just in case. The Doctor sat beside her, stony-faced, and she knew he was angry. She had no idea what could be upsetting him, but he was clearly displeased.
“I had a lovely dinner,” she said, squeezing his hand.
“Didn’t last long before it made a reappearance,” he said, sullen.
“Well, no, but that was hardly your fault. S’my rubbish human biology.” She smiled a little, hoping to ease the tension. “‘Sides, I told Mum I’d look over some baby catalogs with her tonight before she went to bed.”
The Doctor clenched his jaw and Rose realized she’d said something wrong - although for the life of her, she couldn’t figure out what. She decided to ask.
“Nothin’s wrong,” he denied, tipping the cabbie and closing the door. “Perfectly fine, me. That sounds like a lovely evening.”
“S’not lovely, s’necessary,” she said in what she considered a reasonable tone, biting back the snark she wanted to loose on him. “We’re going to need lots of stuff, Doctor.”
“The TARDIS will provide everything we need,” he said confidently. “She spoils you rotten, doesn’t she?”
“Oh, you think I’m spoiled?” she challenged him.
“I didn’t say that.”
“Like a child?”
“Stop it, Rose,” he growled. “Stop putting words in my mouth.”
Rose turned around to face him in the alley. “I’m not the one acting like a spoiled child,” she said, her hands in fists beside her. “You’re the one being all grumpy and sulking. You’re pouting, Doctor, and I want to know why!”
“M’not grumpy!” His brow furrowed and his mouth turned down. “And M’not pouting.”
“You’re acting like someone took your sweets away. I’ve never seen you like this, Doctor. What is wrong with you?”
“Nothin’! I told you, nothin’s wrong!”
“You’re lying to me. Something has you tied all in knots, and I think you’d better tell me what it is. Is it Mum?” He balled up his hands and Rose thought she’d hit paydirt. “That’s it, innit? You’re jealous of me spending time with my mum!”
He answered her through a tight jaw that didn’t move with his words. “That isn’t it, Rose.”
“You’re not used to havin’ to share me, are you? Always have me all to yourself, you do. And now we’re near Mum and I want to spend time with her and it pisses you off!”
“I told you,” he said in a low, angry voice, “that’s not it.”
“Oh yeah? Well what is it?”
“Everything’s goin’ wrong, Rose!” he burst out.
“What do you mean, ‘everything’s goin’ wrong’?”
He crossed his arms. “Had plans, me. And they keep getting fucked up, one way or another.”
“Well I’m so sorry I keep fucking up your grand plans,” sarcasm dripped from her lips. “I thought we’d had a lovely evening -”
“S’not just this evening, Rose! S’been going on for the last week!” He ticked off on his fingers: “It rained on Natale. Fine, that’s nobody’s fault. Your mum wanted to go to Henrik’s with you, and next thing I know you’re gone. Then tonight we have a lovely meal that you immediately throw up-”
“Well excuse the hell out of me, Doctor!” she yelled. “I’m so sorry that my sensitive nose brought on by pregnancy ruined your night!”
“You sayin’ you don’t want to be pregnant?” he crossed his arms.
“I most certainly am not saying that, although I could do without constantly feeling like shit. Something else I could do without is you making me feel like shit -”
He didn’t let her finish before he burst out, “M’not trying to make you feel like shit, Rose -”
She scoffed, crossing her arms over her chest. “Could’ve fooled me.”
“M’tryin’ to propose to you, dammit!” he shouted. “Been tryin’ all week!”
Rose stared at him, eyes wide, jaw slack. “You’re…”
The Doctor looked at her with anxiety instead of anger etching his features. “Yeah. I am.”
Rose felt her heart flutter wildly in her chest, like butterflies trying to escape a cage.
“S’that alright?” he asked, his voice low and quiet.
Rose nodded, speechless. She felt as if her mind were spinning, her thoughts reeling. It occurred to her that she needed to breathe, and when she did, it was shuddering.
The Doctor reached into his pocket and pulled out a box, turning it over and around in his hands, looking down at it.
“Not so great with words, me. Not real sure what to say. Love is a pitiful word, it doesn’t do justice for what I feel for you. But it’s all I’ve got so far as English goes. I’d like to be able to tell you how much I love you in another way that would mean more. But what I’d really like is to marry you.”
Tears splashed onto her cheeks, and Rose covered her mouth with her hands, letting the wetness escaping her eyes slide down her fingers.
The Doctor went on, still fiddling with the box in his hands. “Tried to learn what to do or say here. Watched your daft movies with you, read books. They all made it sound so easy. I had lotsa stuff planned out to say, but to be honest, Rose, when I look at you, you just steal away all my words and thoughts until there’s only you.”
He took a step forward and looked up at her. “Kinda like that feelin’, me. I like knowin’ you’re mine. I like knowin’ I’m yours. I’d like everyone else to know that, too.” He looked back down at the ring box in his hand and took another step forward. “So I s’pose, what I’m sayin’ is…”
He dropped to one knee and opened the box. Rose stared at the ring, agape. It was a large oval diamond, surrounded by two rows of smaller diamonds. She could barely see it through the tears, but once she blinked, it came into focus again, sparkling and reflecting the lights around them.
“Rose Marion Tyler, be m’wife?”
She nodded, laughing and crying, and the Doctor didn’t even bother slipping the ring on her before he scooped her up and spun her around with a whoop of joy. She laughed with him, arms tight around his neck, and he put her down after a moment before they got dizzy, kissing her through their smiles.
Finally, he pulled the ring out of the box to slip on her finger. She looked down at her hand, amazed by the sparkling stone that sat there. “Never meant to do this in a dirty alley, me. Had lots of plans.”
“But Doctor, this is perfect. Don’t you realize where we are?”
He looked around the alley once before turning his beaming face back to her. “Nope.”
“This is the alley you parked in the first time we met. This is where you asked me to run away with you. And I said yes that time, and it was the best thing I ever did. Now here I am, and I just said yes again. Fits, yeah?”
He cupped her face and brought it closer to his for a kiss, moving his mouth gently over hers. “Rose Tyler, you are brilliant,” he said against her lips, smiling.
She brought her hands up to cover his, feeling the weight of the large stone on her left ring finger.
“And don’t you ever forget it, Doctor.”
Notes:
Thank you to everyone who asked about my dad. He's at home now, resting comfortably (considering), and the Doctors say that the surgery was a rousing success. :)
I've had some people ask me when, exactly, Nine is going to regenerate. I can't go into too many details without spoiling, but I will tell you that there are a couple of chapters of fluff and housekeeping next to set up what's coming, but the next time we get into heavy adventure, we'll be saying goodbye to Nine. (Which I'm more than a bit bummed about.) But for now, it's blissful happiness for Nine...and doesn't he deserve it? /nine fangirl
I've got one name that I'm pretty settled on, but I'm still taking recommendations for the other if anyone wants to toss them my way!
By the by,here's Rose's ring.
Thank you for reading. <3
Chapter 16: Handfasting
Summary:
The Doctor and Rose commit to each other.
Notes:
NSFW at the end, so if that's not your thing, message me and I'll give you all the pertinent details without the racy stuff.
Thank you for reading, and for your incredible comments! <3
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Rose called out her mum’s name as soon as they burst through the door to the flat and bounced into the lounge ahead of the Doctor.
Jack and Jackie both sprang to their feet at her excited shout, but relaxed a bit when they saw her beaming face.
“What on Earth, Rose! You scared me to death!” Jackie fussed.
“Look, Mum! Look!” Rose held out her hand to her mother, radiating joy.
“Blimey,” Jackie muttered, turning Rose’s finger this way and that.
Jack clapped the Doctor on the shoulder and shook his hand. “Congratulations, Doc.”
“Thanks, Harkness.”
“Aren’t you glad you listened to me?”
The Doctor looked at Rose and Jackie chattering excitedly, and felt that familiar, pleasant clutching in his hearts when Rose looked over, smiling the smile she saved just for him.
“I am.”
~*~O~*~
“Doctor?” Rose asked as she crawled into bed later that night.
“Yes?” the Doctor replied, pushing down his trousers and reaching for his pajama bottoms.
“When can we do that handfasting thing?”
He pulled up the pajamas and gave her a piercing look. “You really want to?”
“‘Course I do,” she smiled.
“We can do it whenever you want,” he said, hearts thudding. “I’m ready whenever.”
“What needs to happen? Do we need anyone with us?”
The Doctor shook his head. “Don’t need anyone, but can do if you’d like. We’ll likely want privacy shortly after, though.” He gave her a lascivious grin and crawled into bed beside her. They fell into their routine: the Doctor lay back and opened his arm to her, and she curled into his side, resting her head on his shoulder and her hand between his hearts. Tonight, her engagement ring winked up at them, sparkling in the dimming light, and he reached up to fiddle with it absently on his chest.
“When do you want to do it?”
“Oh, Rose Tyler, I wanted to bond with you months and months ago.”
He heard her smile, rather than saw it. “You did?”
“Mmhm.” He traced her bicep under the jumper she wore, the one he’d just shed a little while ago. “Knew you were special from the get-go, me. Wanted you with me enough to ask twice. Wanted you with me forever from the moment you argued with me in Cardiff about the Gelth.” He chuckled and twisted her hand a little, looking down at her ring. “Bought your ring when I sent you shopping with your mum, just before Cardiff. When I bought your necklace.”
Rose gasped a little. “You did?”
“Aye.”
“But we hadn’t...you knew then?”
“Didn’t know that you would accept, nor why I bought it for the longest time. But I knew what it was, I knew what it meant to humans. When I saw it, I thought you’d like it, but didn’t think I’d ever give it to you. Figured I’d wasted my money on a daft impulse because you’d never want me, not with this daft old face, not forever.”
She brought her hand up to touch his face. “I love this daft old face.”
“Didn’t know that then, not really.”
“You really are daft.”
“Oi! Lest you forget, you went off with Rickey two days later.” He was reverting back to the name he’d called the boy when he wanted to emphasize his inferiority, and felt a little bad for it. Changing tactics, he quieted his voice. “You’ll never know what that did to me, Rose.”
“Probably the same thing seeing you with Sarah Jane did to me.”
“Probably.” He captured her fingers and linked them with his again. “Still, that’s all in the past.”
“Will I be your wife when we handfast?”
He thought for a second. “Yes and no. Like I told you, the bond isn’t permanent until a year is up and we complete it. It’s like a trial marriage. You’ll be my bondmate, but you can back out after nine months if you like.” Please don’t back out, he thought.
“I won’t be backing out,” she said, and he wondered for just a second if he’d said that last out loud. “But...will I be your wife? What will we call each other?”
“You mean beyond ‘Doctor’ and ‘Rose’?” He laughed a little when she squeezed his fingers and called him a git. “I know what you meant. There’s a word for it in Gallifreyan, but there’s not really a word for it in English. The closest translation is ‘beloved’.”
“Beloved,” she said, rolling it around in her mouth, testing it out. “What’s the word in Gallifreyan?”
“Alalia.”
“Alalia.” She repeated, testing this word, too. “S’pretty.”
“Aye. Pretty language, Gallifreyan.”
“So I won’t be your wife?”
“Are you so anxious to be?”
“Yes,” she said simply. He felt his eyes prick with tears and blinked them back, leaning down to kiss her hair.
“You’ll be s’good as my wife and I your husband temporarily, until we bond permanently. But Rose, I want you to have a human wedding, too. I won’t be your husband as far as Earth is concerned. It would be legal in the rest of the universe, but not here. Stupid apes,” he said with a laugh, then grunted a little when she elbowed him.
“Why don’t we tell people we had a private, little civil ceremony now, but we want to have a full wedding later?”
“Is that what you want?”
She sighed. “Mum is already planning it. She’ll be terribly disappointed if we don’t get married where she can see.”
“I’m not worried about your mum. Do you want it?”
“Not while I’m big as a house. We can do it after the babies come, if I’m not still big as a house.”
He smiled up at the ceiling. “You’ll be beautiful, don’t worry.” He thought for a second. “There’s a little over nine months to go before the babies get here. Why don’t we plan on getting married in your tradition - all proper and legal - next summer, a year from now? It’ll give you a little time to recover and us to get settled into our new life. We can complete the bond at the same time, that night.”
Rose seemed to consider. “Alright then. I’ll agree on one condition.”
“What’s that, love?”
“You take me on a honeymoon into the stars when we do.”
He chuckled and kissed the top of her head. “Deal.”
“But when can we do the handfasting?”
“Anytime you like.”
“Now?”
“In our jimjams?”
“Yeah. Do we need special robes or something?”
He laughed then shrugged. “If you want, we can do it right here in bed. There are formal ceremonies we can do, if you’d rather, but you say the word and I’ll go get what we need.”
“Seems I’m not the only one who’s eager, eh?”
“Oh, Rose. You have no idea.”
“Go on, then. Get what we need.”
“Are you serious?”
“Incredibly serious.”
The Doctor disturbed Rose’s head resting on his shoulder in his haste to get up. He made it up to her with a quick but thorough snog, then sent a mental message to the TARDIS while jumping out of bed. “Be right back.”
The TARDIS, his faithful ship, had shined a light into their sitting room, and he found the ribbon and bottle of wine he needed waiting on the mantle beside the bowl he had given her in Kyoto, the night he’d told her he loved her.
Perfect. It was like the TARDIS was giving her blessing for him to heal his broken soul and welcome Rose into his mind.
He snatched up all three items and rushed back to the bedroom, grinning goofily, finding Rose sitting up in the bed, waiting for him. “Ready, love?”
“More than,” Rose said with a bright smile.
The Doctor sat down on the bed with his back to her, pulling the stopper out of the wine and pouring a little into the kintsugi tea bowl. Then he turned to Rose and looked her deep in the eyes.
“Rose, you don’t have to do this. I want to, I really want to, but I will be perfectly happy not to do this. I will be thrilled just to marry you in human tradition, if you want.”
She leaned forward and kissed him softly. “I want this, Doctor.”
He beamed at her, then explained what was about to happen. “This is just the bare bones ceremony. First we affirm that we want to handfast with each other, then we share a bit of wine. Just a bit,” he narrowed his eyes at her hopeful look, “just enough to be symbolic.” Rose nodded.
“Then I’ll bind our hands together and we’ll say a few words. And we’ll start to bond; my mind will reach out to yours and form a link.”
“Does it hurt?”
“Not at all, although it’ll probably feel odd to you.”
“Alright,” she said easily, and he was once again blown away by her complete trust in him.
“Ready?” he asked, and she nodded, biting her lip.
He took her hands in his and looked into her big, hazel eyes.
“Rose Tyler, I come this night with a desire to bond with you. Do you accept me as your bondmate through this handfasting?”
“I do, Doctor.”
He turned and fetched the bowl from the bedside table, bringing it back before them. “By the offering and acceptance of wine, we pledge to care for each other and meet the other’s needs.” Then he lowered his eyes a bit. “This isn’t required,” he said, sheepish. “I just wanted to use the bowl. Most of the time in bonding ceremonies, people use crystal goblets for this bit. The bowl just seemed important, somehow.”
She beamed at him and he offered the tea bowl to Rose. She took it in both hands. He gave a little nod, indicating she should drink and she did, then passed it back to him. He took a sip, then turned around set it back on the table, fetching the ribbon and putting it in his lap.
He took his hands in hers again, his hearts thudding against his ribs. Taking up the ribbon from his lap, he wound it around their hands, binding them together as well as he could with no assistance.
“Rose, you are my partner, my love, my helpmate, my friend. I open my hearts, mind, and life to you; may you see all of me and be pleased. I seek to be your touchstone, guide, comfort, and joy. May your heart grow with love. I choose you above all others to share this bond with me.” He nodded to her, indicating she should repeat his words.
“Doctor, you are my partner, my love, my helpmate, my friend. I open my heart, mind, and life to you; may you see all of me and be pleased.” She paused, and the Doctor whispered the next part to her. “I seek to be your touchstone, guide, comfort, and joy. May your hearts grow with love. I choose you above all others to share this bond with me.”
He squeezed her hand from pure, exuberant joy. “Rose, like this ribbon binds our hands, we are bound, together, never alone.”
Rose nodded.
He leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers, a slow, chaste kiss. Breaking from her lips, he rested his forehead on hers. “I love you, Rose.” He smiled, then went on. “That’s not part of the ceremony, either, I just wanted to tell you that.”
He brought his free hand up to the back of her head, pulling her to him for a kiss. “I love you, Rose,” he said again.
“I love you, too.”
“Can we bond now?” he asked, his voice trembling.
“I’d like nothing more,” she smiled, wiping her cheeks with her free hand.
“We’re going for a psyche exchange, where part of my consciousness will stay with you and part of your consciousness will stay with me. It will only become active, though, if we are touching. We’ll only be able to sense each other and feel each other’s emotions if we’re engaged in skin to skin contact.”
Rose touched her tongue to her teeth and he growled, calling her a minx before he went on.
“You’re going to feel something in your mind. Something light, like a tickling. That’s me. Just relax and let me in. I swear I won’t look at your thoughts or anything,” he assured her.
“I don’t care if you do.”
He let out a big breath, almost a laugh. “Even so. If there’s anything you don’t want me to see, just imagine a door and close it.” She nodded.
“Are you ready?”
She nodded again.
The Doctor leaned forward, pressing his forehead to hers, their bound hands resting on her belly. He brought his fingertips to her temple, putting a light pressure there, and reached out for her.
Immediately, he was granted access.
He saw blinding, bright yellow light and felt incredible warmth as her love for him washed over him like a wave.
“Oh, Rose…” he whispered. “it’s so beautiful.”
He concentrated on sending her his own feelings, and she gasped.
“I...I can feel you, I think. I feel love and desire and joy…and it’s blue...”
“That’s me,” he confirmed. “You’re gold...oh, Rose, you’re a glittering gold.” He reveled in the feel of her mind surrounding his. “I didn’t think it would be so easy to bind with you. You...it’s like you were made to come into mind and accept me into yours.”
“Another gift from Bad Wolf?” she grinned, opening her eyes to look at him.
“I think...I think she wanted us to be together, Rose. She wanted this.”
“Maybe she just gave us what we wanted.”
“Yeah.” He turned his head a little, rolling his forehead along hers. The intensity of the love he received from her overwhelmed his senses, his mind’s eye nearly blinded with the color of her love, a brilliant, sparkling ruby red. His entire self was awash in Rose’s human warmth. He shared his own deeply intimate feelings of love and adoration with her, and reveled in the joy he felt returned to him along their link.
“I - I can feel you, in my mind,” Rose whispered. “It’s like...it’s like when we hold hands, and they fit together so perfectly. It feels like our minds are doing that.”
“Yeah,” he replied, struggling with himself, trying to refrain from exploding everywhere at once within her mind, keeping a leash on his psyche, reminding himself that she had never experienced anything like this and it was best to go slow. But gods she felt so good...her gold presence in his mind soothed him and gently applied itself to breaks it found. Mental chasms that he hadn’t even known he had joining, sealed with her compassion and endless, boundless love.
As wonderful as she felt, it was his own presence in her mind that was leaving him breathless. Easing into Rose’s mind had felt like sliding into a warm bath: he felt her touch on every part of him, warm and comforting, a gentle, loving pressure engulfing him and leaving him awe-stricken.
Her mind presented itself to him as a glowing cathedral and he stood in the middle, trying desperately to comprehend her beauty. Light streamed down on him from all sides and he looked up to find the source of it, seeking to bask further in the love she surrounded him with. The walls were lined with stained glass windows that cast jewel-bright shadows down all around him - he was amazed to see that the windows were scenes from their life together - both past events and things hoped for. He could see her faith in him, her love for him, and he was humbled.
“You’re beautiful, Doctor.”
Oh, Rose, he thought to himself. If only you knew how much more you deserve.
“Why are you sad?” she asked, and he blew out a breath of a laugh. He might have known that his fantastic girl would be able to see that.
“You’re perfect, Rose. Just...you’re perfect.”
With the bond formed, he dropped his free hand from her temple and cupped her face, kissing her gently. He felt her desire burning through their bond, and it grew in intensity when he deepened the kiss. The light coming from her mind glowed brighter even as it darkened to crimson, then finally a rich, glittering scarlet.
“Will it always be like this?” she panted when he moved his mouth to her jaw, then her neck.
He paused to suckle at the spot behind her ear. “Anytime our skin meets, I’ll be able to feel what you feel - if you want me to feel your emotions and thoughts. If you’re happy, I’ll feel your joy. If you’re sad, I’ll feel that as well. And if you’re randy, well, I’ll have to work on my self-control.” Rose giggled and he took advantage to switch to the opposite side of her neck. “You’ll be able to feel what I feel, as well.”
“I like that,” she breathed. He wasn’t sure if she was talking about the connection or the way his lips danced along her collarbone. In that moment, he didn’t give a damn.
“I want to make love to you, Rose. It’s not part of the ceremony, but I want to make love to my wife.”
She sucked in a breath. “Your wife.”
“My wife,” he confirmed. “For now, and soon forever. My alalia. You are my alalia.” He kissed back up her jaw, stopping for moment at her chin then covering her mouth with his while she carded her fingers through his hair.
“Make love to me, Doctor,” she whispered against his mouth.
He groaned and lay her back, supine beneath him. “We probably need to release our hands.”
She pulled back from kissing his shoulder and looked him in the eyes. “As long as you don’t unbind from me.”
“Aye,” he said, realizing that that didn’t make much sense and not caring. The deep red of her lust, desire and passion pulsed and shimmered his mind. He groaned from the intensity.
The Doctor wasn’t sure how long it took to unbind their hands, but it was entirely too long for his liking. As soon as the ribbon was free he tossed it aside and pulled off his vest, tugging down his pajama bottoms and kneeling between her legs, naked. He ran his hands up and down her thighs, sliding up to the knickers-covered apex, and applied a gentle pressure to the wetness he found there.Rose gasped.
He gave a little cry at the sharp increase of her arousal within his mind and sat her up, tugging his jumper over her head and chasing her back down to the bed with a deep, thorough kiss. His hands slid down to her hip and he pulled her heat towards him. At the same time, he pressed against her, mimicking the act he craved. He sent her a rush of desire and love through their bond, showing her the depth of his need for her and his arousal. She moaned into his mouth in response.
A moment later, her knickers were tossed over his shoulder and she lay before him, a goddess, his alalia, his mate, her belly swollen with his children.
“You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen, Rose,” he whispered, sensing the fragility of the warm bubble they were in and wanting to preserve it.
She saw herself lying before him, and felt the Doctor’s reverence and awe glowing within her mind and gasped. “Is that what I look like to you?”
“Yes,” he confirmed, skimming his hands up her thighs to her hips.
She smiled at him, and want, mixed with the most intense love he’d ever known, flared in his mind. With a strangled moan, he covered her, resting his weight on his elbows, keeping it off of her belly.
Leaning onto one elbow, he brought his hand down between her legs, parting her lips and sliding his finger inside. “You’re so wet, love. So wet for me.”
“All for you.” She nipped at his earlobe. “Only for you.”
The Doctor trembled from the ferocity of her want, the sheer magnitude of her love. An irrepressible need to claim her swept through his mind, and he felt a rush of smug satisfaction in response from Rose.
“I can’t wait, Rose,” he said around her nipple. His fingers slid in and out of her, testing her readiness, seeking her pleasure. “I need you, now. I have to...I have to feel you around me.”
“Take what you need,” she panted.
He felt her giving herself to him through their bond, offering up her body to him just as she had her mind. A wave of pale pink trust washed over him; he felt its caress in every cell of his body.
“Rose, you don’t know, you can’t know...being able to feel you…”
“Please,” she whimpered.
He withdrew his fingers and braced himself on his hands above her. He positioned himself at her entrance only a moment before slipping deliciously into her.
Rose’s pleasure blazed in his mind; he felt what she felt, how he filled her, her enjoyment at the slide of him in and out of her. When he increased the speed of his thrusts, they both moaned with satisfaction.
The contentment he felt from her increased exponentially, along with her lust and the desire for more. He bent to kiss her slowly, tenderly, his tongue exploring.
He felt the gratitude and joy he was sending her, and realized that they’d created a feedback loop. He was no longer just sensing her glowing gold presence in his own mind, he felt all of the emotions that she was receiving from him. All of his own pleasure filtered through her mind and came back to him, mixed inextricably with hers. He knew that her pleasure was mixing with his and pulsing along their link back to her. A tiny spark of concern flickered in his mind and he wondered just how much more intense this was going to become.
Gradually the Doctor increased the speed of his thrusts, and he gloried in the little impact noises he extracted from her. He felt the little shock of pleasure every time he plunged himself into her, he got to experience the way his pistoning hips drove her higher and higher, and her own desperate need inflamed his. She gasped when he felt her smoldering heat clench and yield around him rhythmically, and he could do nothing more than give her more. His mouth bent to nibble and suck one nipple and then the other. Rose whimpered and bit her lip, and their link blazed with passion.
He increased his thrusts again, and she began to plead within her mind as well as with with her mouth, incoherent pleading of more, please, harder, faster, Doctor, yes, fuck, more, just there spilling from her swollen lips in no particular order.
He buried his face in her neck and tried to control himself against the blazing heat on their link, desperate to prolong this unbelievable level of pleasure. He never wanted this to end, but it was too good, she was too hot...her pleasure was too intense...he tried to slow his hips, and she dug her fingers into his shoulder.
“Please,” she said on a ragged breath.
“I have to slow down. It’s too intense. Feels too good. If I don’t slow down, it’ll end.”
“We can go again later. Just please…”
The Doctor had never been one to deny Rose Tyler.
He sped up, mindful of her belly and keeping his weight off of her, kissing her between panting breaths. The heat and desire burned in his mind like an inferno, and he worried about her ability to handle it, afraid it may burn her - afraid it may burn him.
“Please,” she whimpered.
He sped up with a cry, feeling her orgasm just out of her reach. His own release was galloping upon him, but he wouldn’t go - couldn’t go - over that cliff without her. He needed Rose with him for everything.
He brought his hand down to the place they were joined and circled her clit.
Her presence in his mind cracked, then exploded in a detonation of pleasure. Red, yellow, pink all swirled around his mind and they both shouted with the force; both the clenching of her tight, wet heat around his cock and the fiery pleasure in her mind. It sent him careening over the cliff into his own release, the most intense pleasure he’d ever known consuming him with a cry of something like triumph, Rose pleading beneath him.
He murmured his claim to her between the soft butterfly kisses he rained over her face. “My alalia, my Rose. My wife, my alalia.”
She didn’t seem able to form words just yet.
“I love you,” he panted, the white-hot of their link cooling into contentment, joy, and love. “I love you.”
“I’m yours,” she said, catching her breath. “Always yours. Only yours.”
“My alalia.”
“Yes, forever.”
Notes:
Y'all, this chapter and I went ten rounds before we called it a draw. I had so many things I wanted to do/say, but they wouldn't come out onto the screen for me. Maybe I can get them out later. :)
On a similar note - for the first time since I started publishing this story, I do not have chapters queued up and ready to post. Chapter 17 is giving me fits, and simply does not want to be written. Eventually, I'm going to get to a point where I just throw up my hands and post what I have, but I'm making a concerted effort to make what I have as good as possible before that time.
Endless thank yous to tenroseforeverandever, who held my hand all through this chapter and is being exactly what I need to get the next chapter together, too. <3
I know that I said recently that on the next adventure chapter we'd have regeneration, but I was mistaken. I had forgotten one event that was outlined and needs to happen. As it stands right now, looks like regeneration should be happening around Chapter 20 or 21.
Thank you guys. <3
p.s. I only learned this very morning that alalia means "the inability to speak". I'm entirely too lazy to change it, so we're going to pretend it's just a word I made up. K?
Chapter 17: Jackie's Interlude
Summary:
The Doctor and Rose have been travelling for almost two weeks, since they handfasted, but Rose is keeping in touch with her mother.
Notes:
As always, huge thanks to tenroseforeverandever who completely held my hand and walked me through this chapter. It took me two weeks to get it written, and it never would have without you, hon!
I've been in a hell of a slump and honestly, you guys reading and commenting (in concert with tenroseforeverandever - SuperBeta) are what has pulled me out. Thank you. <3
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Jackie put her key into the mailbox and turned, opening the little door and extracting the contents. She re-closed the door without looking, then turned to sift through the mail absently while she climbed the stairs to her flat.
A tabloid. Blimey, Brangelina again? It’d be lovely to hear about someone else every now and again, eh?
An advertisement for the grand re-opening of Henrik’s. Might be worth a look, could pick up some stuff for the babies.
A bill, another bill, blimey, a third bill... and then a postcard. Jackie smiled down at the peaceful beach scene on the card while she unlocked the door and went inside.
Laying the other, now forgotten mail down on the table, she flipped the card over and read Rose’s familiar, looping writing:
Mum,
You’d love it here in the Bahamas. There are cabana boys who bring you fruity drinks with umbrellas in them. The Doctor suggested that we bring you one home as a souvenir. I didn’t think you would mind that at all.
I sent you a couple of emails with some pictures - did you get them?
We’re making one more stop when we leave here - going to India for a few days. By the time you get this, we’ll probably already be there. We’ll be home on the 30th, so not long.
Love you, Mum. Take care of Jack and send him our love!
xoxo,
Rose
“Jacks?”
“M’here, Jack!”
The American captain - her new flatmate for the last two weeks - came around the corner and smiled when he saw it was her. “I heard the door open and close, but didn’t know you’d gone out.”
“Just ran down to get the mail, s’all. Got another postcard from Rose and himself.” She held it out to him.
Jack read it, smiling, and then snorting when he reached the end. “Yeah, I’m quite sure the Doctor sent me his love.”
“You and me both,” Jackie muttered. She grinned and took the card back from him, walking to the refrigerator to hang it with the others she’d gotten from Las Vegas (oh, she was going to kill that man if he’d gone and really married Rose while she wasn’t there), Paris, and now the Bahamas.
“So they’ll be home on Thursday?”
Jackie nodded and turned to the kettle to start making tea. “S’what Rose said.”
“I’m sure she’ll be glad to be home,” Jack said, having a seat at the table to wait for the tea she was making. It had taken her a while to condition him, but he seemed to have gotten the hang of being mothered a bit.
She scoffed at him. “This hasn’t been Rose’s home since that ruddy alien blew up her job.”
Jack laughed. “There are worse things he could have blown up, I suppose.”
Jackie fought down a smile. “Oh, I hated that job anyway. M’glad she’s not going back.”
Jack nodded over at the postcard on the fridge. “What’s she had to say in her emails?”
Jackie shrugged, her back to him while she made tea. “No idea. I didn’t realize she’d been sending them. I’ll go check in a bit.” She pulled down a pair of mugs for tea. “Cuppa?”
He raised his hands. “No, not today. I’ve got to go to the manor. The Doctor didn’t like the look of the contractor’s assistant, and asked me to check in every day or so.”
“That young girl with the clipboard? Oh, she seemed nice enough,” Jackie protested.
Jack shrugged. “He didn’t like the way she was looking at Rose.”
“Lookin’ at her, how?”
“I don’t know exactly, but the Doctor said that the girl paid just a bit too much attention to Rose for his liking. Said she kept eyeing Rose up and down, then looking over at him.” Jack crossed his arms and leaned against the doorjamb. “The three of us have gotten pretty used to people giving us funny looks, trying to figure out which one of us Rose belonged to -”
Jackie squawked, “Belongs to!?”
Jack held up a placating hand. “Now, Jacks, you have to remember that in other parts of the universe, people don’t think like we do. We’ve gone to multiple places where a female who was unspoken for could end up in a harem. We had to be careful.”
“So the two of you just go around sharin’ my daughter?”
He narrowed his eyes and gave her a disbelieving look. “Jackie. C’mon, now.”
Jackie wouldn’t meet his eyes. Of course the Doctor and Jack wouldn’t treat Rose like chattel. She knew that, knew it deep in her bones. They both loved her too much for that.
“Besides,” Jack went on, seeming to read her quietness for what it was, “there was never any sharing to it when we went to those places. The Doctor always stepped up and spoke for Rose.”
“Dunno how I feel about that,” Jackie muttered, and Jack laughed.
“Jacks, I know you and the Doctor don’t always see eye-to-eye, but I swear to you on my very own soul, he’s never treated her as anything other than what she is to him - the most precious thing in the universe. He loves her madly, and he’d do anything to keep her safe.”
Jackie sighed. “I know that. S’just...hard, you know?” She hesitated a minute before she went on. “D’you have any kids, Jack?”
“None that I know of,” he waggled his eyebrows.
“Rose’s dad died when she was six months old, an’ s’been just me n’her ever since. I did alright, I think.” She nodded to herself, looking into her cup of tea, “considerin’ it was just me. An’ I don’t know how it would have been if her dad had lived, if it had been the three of us instead of just Rose and m’self, but Rose...she became everything to me. I woke up in the mornin’ - every mornin’ - with that little girl on my mind, and she never left my thoughts. The selfish things that I did for me, like tryin’ to meet someone else, they never worked out. The best things in my life always had to do with Rose. And it was just me an’ her, you know?
“While she was gone off with himself, all I wanted was for her to come back to me. I missed my baby girl so much. Now she’s back, but she’s not my little girl anymore.” Jackie gestured up to the postcards on the door of the fridge. “She’s marryin’ a - a bloke, and they’re already expectin’ babies. She’ll be livin’ in a big mansion out in Kent when she’s here, and I just….I miss my little girl.”
Jackie didn’t protest when the American pulled her into a hug, but she refrained from crying in earnest.
“Rose is happy,” she said against his shoulder. “S’all any parent ever wants. S’just hard watchin’ her go from the little girl doin’ flips off the coffee table to a wife and mother.”
Jack didn’t say anything, and she was glad.
~*~O~*~
Jackie sat down at the computer Mickey had set up for her, mentally going through the steps to turn the stupid contraption on, then to get to the emails Rose had sent her. She really didn’t want to have to call Mickey for help, and Jack had just left. After a few minutes and a handful of choice swear words, she opened the page she needed, typed in her username and password, then sat back and took another sip of tea while the page loaded.
There were several emails from Rose, but Jackie clicked on the one closest to the top, dated two days before, and began to read.
Mum,
We’re leaving for India as soon as the Doctor finishes tinkering on the spatial whats-it, but for now we’re still in the Bahamas. It’s so beautiful, Mum, we’ll have to come here sometime. You won’t believe it, but the Doctor took off his coat for a while and even put on some trunks to play in the water with me. Can you believe it? I’m looking forward to going to India, though. :)
Guess what, Mum? The babies moved! I could feel them, but the Doctor couldn’t, even though he tried to talk them into moving some more so he could feel. It’s so funny when he talks to the babies, and they seem to like it when he does. They squirm around a bit, even though he can’t tell. It shouldn’t be long before you guys can feel them, too.
I keep wondering what we’re having, whether it’s boys or girls or one of each! The Doctor says he doesn’t care, he just wants all of us healthy and happy, but I think he’s secretly daydreaming about a little girl. You haven’t said...which would you rather have? Not that there’s anything we can do about it at this point, but it’s just fun to think about. :) I think one of each sounds nice.
I’m getting so fat, Mum. And I knew that I was going to, but it doesn’t make it any easier. I feel a little better about it since the babies moved. It kind of reminded me that all of the nausea and tiredness and everything were for a reason. A really good reason. Two really good reasons, actually! But still...it’s hard. How did you feel about it? Am I being vain?
Gotta go, something sounds like it just fell and the Doctor is cursing in his native language. That’s never good. Probably means we’re going to be here for a couple more hours, but I should check it out!
Let’s spend a day together when I get back, yeah? Just me and you. A girls’ day.
I love you,
Rose
P.S. I attached some pictures from the last couple of days here in the Bahamas. I look like I swallowed a watermelon!
Jackie scrolled down to look at the pictures Rose had sent. The first one was of her and a bloke...tall with dark hair and a bit of scruff on his face. Rose had on a loose, flowing sundress that draped softly over her swelling belly and a wide-brimmed hat. The bloke she was with had on a light-colored linen shirt and boardshorts. He had his arm around Rose’s waist, and Rose’s hand rested on the bloke’s chest, the diamond in her ring twinkling merrily. Both were smiling brightly at the camera.
It took a while before Jackie realized that the bloke with her daughter was the Doctor.
She took a minute and studied the picture closer. Rose’s smile lit up her entire face, as did the Doctor’s. The Doctor’s long fingers rested on Rose’s waist comfortably, and Rose was leaning into him. He was much taller than her, but it only seemed to make them fit together better - Rose’s head lay on his shoulder as if it were meant to be there.
It occurred to Jackie then that Rose’s head was meant to be there. Somehow, some way, her daughter had been fated to be with a daft, big-eared, time-travelling alien. They completed and complimented each other, and her daughter was clearly blissfully happy.
Jackie wiped her eyes and took a sip of her tea before she leaned forward and started the slow process of sending an email back to Rose.
Rose,
I’m glad you’re having a good time. I couldn’t imagine the Doctor wearing anything but that ridiculous coat, you’re right about that. He looks so different without it! You’ve changed him a bit, it seems. Reckon that’s a good thing. I don’t want to slap him so much anymore these days.
You’re not fat, sweetheart, you’re pregnant. When you get home, I’ll show you a couple of pictures from my baby shower with you. I looked huge - but that was okay. It took me a while to be alright with getting so big, but your dad was real sweet about it. He liked to talk to you. He told you stories while you were still in my belly. I told him that was ridiculous but he didn’t seem to care. Seemed he was right, too, because you always quieted right down in his arms. Such a daddy’s girl. He’d be right daft about you having twins.
I’m like the Doctor (God help me), I just want you and the two babies to be healthy. The idea of being a Nan is starting to grow on me a bit. In fact, I’m headed out in just a minute to do a little shopping for the babies. I do wish your daft bloke would quit being such a stick in the mud and let us find out what you’re having. I’ve got grandbabies to shop for!
Jack is fine. He’s spending most of his time out at the Doctor’s house, zipping back and forth in that little car he got. I asked him how he was paying for a car like that and he just tapped his nose.
I think a girl’s day sounds lovely when you get home.
Bev sends her love.
Love, Mum
~*~O~*~
She hadn’t lied to Rose in her email - she was excited about the grandbabies, now that she’d gotten used to the idea. She’d always wanted grandchildren, she’d just hoped that Rose would be a bit older, would have lived a bit more. Rose was right, though: she really had seen and done a lot in the last year and a half with the Doctor that she never would have gotten the chance to do without him. And although she’d have prefered for the babies to happen much later and with a human, the Doctor had grown on her. She could have done worse for a son-in-law, she supposed.
But now it was time to focus on the most important aspect to all of this - she was going to be a Nan in a few months, and she needed to start getting ready.
If only she knew what color to buy? Daft alien making everyone wait until twenty weeks, Jackie grumbled to herself as she fingered pink and blue onesies. She had some rainy day money stowed away, and it was burning a hole in her pocket. She felt an almost irrepressible need to start buying gifts and toys for her grandbabies. It was never too early to spoil them rotten.
She was Nan, after all. The only grandparent they’d have. She needed to do this thing right.
Not knowing whether to buy pink or blue had only slowed Jackie a little when it came to filling her cart at the baby superstore. She told herself that she would simply buy the things that she’d need at her flat when they were visiting or she was babysitting, and, of course, she’d need a lot. And, well, she could always start picking up things that Rose would need in the nursery at the manor, couldn’t she? Of course she could. She was Nan. Far be it from anyone to tell a grandmother not to buy every little thing her precious grandbabies might need at some point in the future.
Nappies, burp cloths, bottles and pacis, rattles and teething rings, gowns decorated with little duckies... all found their way into her cart. She could almost see the Doctor roll his eyes and hear Rose protesting that they should go together, but they could all go out together later. Right now, she was in Nan mode.
She parked the cart in front of a wall of stuffed animals, picking up a pink elephant and blue puppy to study both, her fingers itching to buy, but not knowing which to get.
“Ruddy alien,” she muttered.
“Can I help you?” came a sweet voice from over her shoulder, startling her. Jackie spun around to look at the sales associate who had spoken to her. She was young - just a bit older than Rose, really - with mousy brown hair and wide eyes. Her smile was kind and inquisitive, and it was clear that she was waiting on an answer from Jackie.
“Oh, no, just lookin’.”
The associate - Courtney, according to her name badge - nodded at the animals in her hand and asked kindly, “Haven’t found out the baby’s sex yet?”
“No, not yet,” Jackie sighed. “Doctor says it’s too soon.”
“Ah, well, it’s always best to listen to your doctor,” Courtney smiled.
“The Doctor’s my son-in-law,” Jackie explained absently, still pondering the toys in her hands. “We could find out now, but he’s being a ruddy a- hardhead about it all.”
Courtney took a step forward. “This is for your grandbaby?”
“Grandbabies,” Jackie corrected. “M’daughter’s havin’ twins!” Her shoulders straightened with pride.
“Oooh,” Courtney cooed, a twinkle in her eye. “Twins! How lovely, congratulations! Will this be your first time as a grandparent?”
“Yeah,” Jackie said, still smiling. “M’Rose isn’t very old, but she’s clever. Mature. I was worried about it at first, but not so much now.”
Courtney nodded wisely. “Many young mothers do a wonderful job.”
“Was young when I had my Rose, myself,” Jackie pondered. “Had to do it alone after my Pete left us. Dunno how I did it, some days.”
The sales associate looked concerned. “Your daughter won’t be left alone, will she?”
Jackie scoffed. “She’ll be the furthest thing from alone. Jack’s stayin’ with ‘em, and I’ll be going to stay with them just before the babies come and for a few weeks after. She’ll not be by herself.”
“No,” Courtney replied patiently. “I meant, you don’t think your son-in-law will be leaving your daughter, do you?”
“The Doctor? Leave Rose?” Jackie snorted again. “Not bloody likely, no matter how much I’ve wished he would.” She put the pink elephant down and reached for a plush yellow giraffe, missing the tiny furrow of Courtney’s brow. “‘Sides, my Pete didn’t leave willingly. Died, Pete did.”
Courtney brought her hand up to her throat in a gesture of sympathy. “I’m so sorry for your loss.”
“Thank you. It’s been twenty years now. Think I did alright. And as for the Doctor…” she chuckled. “He’s more than a bit older than my Rose, but I reckon he’ll be kicking around long after the rest of us have gone.”
Courtney made a show of looking around the store. “Your daughter isn’t with you?”
“Nah,” Jackie said, switching out the yellow giraffe for a brown teddy bear. “Went on a bit of a holiday. A honeymoon, I reckon you’d call it, even though they’re not having a real wedding ‘til after the babies are born. Still,” she mused. “Seems I’ve got the Doctor for a son-in-law now.”
“Most women hope for their daughter to marry someone successful, like a doctor,” Courtney reasoned.
Jackie snorted a laugh. “S’not that kinda doctor. He’s...well, he travels around and helps people. Took my Rose with ‘im, he did. S’just called the Doctor.”
“Oh?” the other woman raised an eyebrow. “Doesn’t have a name? How mysterious.”
Jackie thought quickly. “He’s got a name. John,” she supplied.
Courtney stepped forward, uselessly shuffling some stuffed animals around. “They go anywhere nice, your Rose and her Doctor?”
“Oh, all over the place,” Jackie said dismissively. “New York, the Bahamas, India, Paris...quite the whirlwind tour. They’ll be home soon, though,” she continued. “Got to finish remodeling the house.”
“They’re remodeling a house?”
“Yeah, turns out the Doctor has an estate out in Kent he had never told Rose about. It’s old fashioned and decrepit, so ‘e’s havin’ it updated a bit. Big house. A manor, actually.”
“Goodness. They certainly left you behind with a lot to do!”
Jackie shook her head. “Nah. Jack’s here. He’s handlin’ the manor while they’re gone. Took a day off today to come shoppin’ with me. ‘E’s a good bloke. Don’t see him around now, though…” She stood on tiptoe and looked around the store, trying to spot Jack.
Courtney smiled. “They certainly sound like a busy couple! On the go all the time!”
Jackie smiled a little in return. “Tha’s them, I suppose.”
“Everything alright?” Jack sauntered up to the two women, tossing something into Jackie’s basket and putting his hands in his pockets.
Jackie turned and smiled at him to find him eyeing the sales associate up and down. “S’fine, Jack. Just wishing I knew what colors to buy.”
“Ah, well, only a week or so until we know, Jackie. Not much longer. Hi,” he extended his hand towards the sales associate and smiled brightly. “Captain Jack Harkness.”
Jackie wasn’t sure, but she didn’t think Jack seemed as flirty as he usually was. When he pulled back from shaking Courtney’s hand he adjusted his sleeves, tugging them down over his wrists and covering the odd watch contraption he always wore. Jackie just gave him a speculative look, then turned to shake Courtney’s hand. “I’m Jackie Tyler, by the by.”
“Mrs. Tyler, it was lovely to talk to you,” Courtney gushed. “It sounds like you have a wonderful family.”
“They are rather fantastic,” Jackie said, wincing at the Doctor’s favorite word in her mouth, trying to ignore Jack’s smirk. Ruddy alien rubbing off on me, he is. “It was so nice to talk to you, too,” Jackie smiled.
“Ready to go, Jackie?” Jack asked, watching the sales associate walk away with something like suspicion.
“Reckon so, just…I wish I knew what to get.” She contemplated a minute more, then reached over and grabbed two white lambs. “There,” she said, satisfied. “I can just put a little pink or blue ribbon on each one.”
“Sounds good.” Jack didn’t look at her, and his answer was distracted.
Jackie narrowed her eyes at him, watching him watch Courtney walk away. “Or I could tie one around your neck and make you wear it out when we go places.”
“That’ll be good, too.”
Jackie threw up her hands. “Cor, but Rose was right about you. Shag a brick wall, you would,” Jackie said derisively, taking her cart and steering it towards the checkout lanes.
“What? No!” Jack protested, falling into step beside Jackie. “I’m not trying to shag anyone. It’s just...something about that woman makes me nervous.” He looked over his shoulder, where Courtney had disappeared down an aisle. “Jackie, you didn’t tell her anything…”
“Anything what?” Jackie demanded.
“Anything...sensitive. Dangerous.”
“‘Course not. What do you take me for?”
Jack didn’t answer, he just continued to look over his shoulder. “Just...be careful.”
Jackie bristled. “Is Rose in danger?”
“No! No, not at all. There are just people who would be very interested in a...um…” He lowered his voice. “In Rose’s unusual pregnancy.”
Jackie Tyler, Nan-to-be, narrowed her eyes at Jack. “Are you sure my Rose isn’t in any danger?”
He stopped her with a hand on her arm, putting his other hand over his heart. “Jackie, I know I speak for the Doctor when I tell you that we will never, ever let anything happen to your daughter or grandbabies. Okay?”
She gave him an appraising look, then nodded. “Alright then,” she acquiesced. “See that you don’t.” Jackie looked down into her cart and picked up the two items Jack had tossed in there - a pair of matching yellow and purple bibs that said ‘I love my uncle’.
“Getting excited, are we?” Jackie asked, her lip quirked.
“Damn right I am,” Jack confirmed while they walked down the aisle towards the checkout. “I’ll be the best uncle in all of time and space. Just you watch, Jackie Tyler.”
Jackie took her hand off the cart long enough to pat him on the shoulder. “I’m sure you will, love.”
“But for now,” he said with a cheeky grin. “I’d like to show you what a charming lunch date I can be. What do you say, Jacks? May I take the most beautiful woman in London out for a nice soup-and-salad?”
Jackie giggled and agreed. It was easy to see why Rose was so fond of this American bloke. He sure knew how to make a girl feel special.
They were in the checkout line and Jackie was about to pay when Jack’s phone rang. He took a step away from putting the bags full of Jackie's purchases back into the cart so he could answer.
Jack was smiling broadly and looked up from the phone to Jackie before he answered it. “It’s the Doctor,” he said in a low voice by way of explanation. Jackie nodded.
“Doctor, hi! How’s the honeymoon? Shouldn’t you be-”
His words cut off quickly, and Jackie looked over at him. He was no longer smiling. His eyes were wide and alarmed. Jackie felt her heart clench inside her chest.
“Jack? What is it?”
He made a quick shushing motion and Jackie took a step backwards, her alarm growing.
“Is she-” Jack started, then got cut off again.
Jackie clenched her fist and brought it to her chest. “Tell me what’s going on, Jack!”
He ignored her for a moment, then spun around to face her, his palm outstretched. “Jackie. Pen.”
Jackie dug frantically in her pocketbook until she pulled out a blue ink pen and handed it to Jack. He snatched it and started scribbling on his own hand.
“Right,” he said. “Do I ask for anyone or -”
The cashier cleared her throat and called for Jackie’s attention. She turned around and gave the girl her credit card without much more than a glance, then looked back at Jack with wide eyes.
“Right. I’ve got Jackie, we’ve been shopping so we’re in town. We’ll be there in just a few minutes. Tell Rose we love her.” Then he hung up.
“Jack?” Jackie asked, her voice choked. “What’s wrong with Rose?”
The Captain took a deep breath, then turned on his heel to look at her. “First things first, I need you to stay calm, alright? Everything is going to be fine. Just...stay calm.”
“You’re scaring me. What’s happened to my daughter!? Where is she!?”
Jack noticed the cashier trying to hand Jackie her card back, and took it for her, putting it into Jackie’s purse. “The Doctor has brought Rose back to town and taken her to -” he cut his eyes towards the people nearby before he went on, “a hospital. She’s having some pains. But she’s okay.”
“I want to see her! Now!”
Jack nodded and grabbed Jackie’s purchases up, starting towards the door. “That’s where we’re headed. Let’s go.”
Notes:
....sorry for the cliffie? (Kinda. *evil laugh*)
We'll be finding out very, very soon whether Jackie should have gotten pink or blue...or both! I'm still taking name suggestions for both, just in case you were interested. :D
Chapter 18: The New Doctor
Summary:
Rose experiences a bit of a crisis, but meets a new doctor.
Notes:
Well, guys, this is officially the longest fic I've ever written! I really, really enjoyed writing this chapter. It's a bit long, but I hope you like it.
We're getting close to time for Nine to leave us, folks. Not long now. But there's lots of good stuff coming up, too! Friends and enemies alike will be making an appearance, and just what sex(es) are these babies, after all?
In the meantime, thank you for reading my story! Your kudos, comments and support mean the absolute world to me.
Just as a reminder: beta'd by TenRoseForeverAndEver, but all the mistakes are mine.
I own nothing; if I did Nine would have gotten to nuzzle Rose Tyler the way he always wanted.
Come talk to me!
caedmonfaith.tumblr.com
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
*~*~*Nineteen Weeks*~*~*
The Doctor was one of the cleverest beings in the universe, if not the most clever. He knew the secrets of galaxies and histories of cultures, he knew the mysteries of the vortex and how, exactly Time unfolded and re-tangled itself. He had seen creation and destruction, and he knew how to bring about both. Had brought about both.
He also knew that he was the luckiest bastard in all of reality.
He should be horrified by the events of the last year-and-a-half. The idea that the Doctor, Time Lord of Gallifrey, the Oncoming Storm, found himself firmly wrapped around the little finger of a human girl who was now his bondmate and wife, that they were expecting children together, and that he was willingly settling down on Earth with her should have been utterly appalling to him. The Time Lords would have exiled him and Rassilon only knows what they would have done with Rose and the babies. He should have run from her, run like hell.
But he hadn’t and he wouldn’t. The Time Lords were gone, and even if they weren’t, he couldn’t be sorry for this new life with Rose. The Doctor had always understood something that his fellow Time Lords could never grasp: humans were in no way less than them. In fact, some humans were superior. His Rose, for example.
He had been surprised by how much he craved her presence in his mind once they bonded, how much she soothed him when she was there. He really shouldn’t have been surprised at all...her physical presence had always been calming to him. It only made sense that her golden aura in his mind would be just as palliative, if not more so. Still - he hadn’t been expecting the constant craving for her touch in his mind.
And then there were the babies. He’d never guessed that he would be so excited about impending fatherhood, but he really, really was. His children on Gallifrey had been loomed, and it had been a singularly unemotional experience. Very little emotional connection, solely a telepathic one. According to Time Lord practices, the children weren’t rocked or nuzzled. They were taught from the earliest age that emotions were dangerous and for lesser beings. They were taught to control themselves.
Conception and gestation of his previous children on Gallifrey had been a completely clinical process: he and his Time Lady wife had contributed their genetic materials in order to create a child, the materials had been applied to the looms, and a child had emerged some time later. Ostensibly, his own child. He had felt some anticipation and excitement over the impending arrival of his offspring: anticipation that he’d tried hard to hide, lest he cause problems. When his children emerged from the looms, he’d been disappointed to find that they had not taken after him at all. They were perfect little Time Lords. He should have felt some satisfaction from that, but the only solace he had taken was that at least they wouldn’t fear the retribution of their peers and be labeled a renegade for their ability to feel.
But now that life was gone, Gallifrey and all the Time Lords were gone. He had been on his own...until Rose. He’d committed just about every taboo possible in this relationship with her, but he had a hard time caring what they would have had to say about it, were they still around. He was happy, whether he deserved it or not. Rose was impossibly, miraculously pregnant with twins. He was getting a second chance at fatherhood - away from the influence of the unemotional Time Lords he’d been trained by. He was free to love these children he’d created with Rose. And oh, how he loved them.
The Doctor didn’t know where this incredible love had come from, really. He’d felt affection for his loomed children but, of course, to maintain his position as a proper Time Lord, he’d had to conceal his emotions. The children couldn’t know, their mother couldn’t know, the council couldn’t know...the knowledge that he actually cared about his children had to be protected, kept secret and hidden.
This, however, felt entirely different. Perhaps it was the fact that he was getting to watch his babies grow, to feel the swell of the womb that was nurturing them grow under his hand. Perhaps it was the knowledge that with two little Gallifreyan children, he would no longer be the last. It could be that his incredible love for their mother led him to love her children so much it physically ached.
He wasn’t sure, but he thought it was likely a combination of all of the above.
The 'why' didn’t really matter, he supposed. All that mattered, really, was that his children would be loved and cherished, likely more than any other children that had ever been born. Certainly more than any Time Lord offspring ever had.
The Doctor had found himself daydreaming often over the last few months, in the small hours while Rose was sleeping and he lay beside her. He didn’t need the sleep, of course, he just needed her proximity. He’d lie beside her, soothed by the gentle snoring that she denied so vehemently, and stare up at the ceiling. He imagined himself looking down at a tiny infant, pink cheeked with downy hair, a tiny hand wrapped securely around his finger. He envisioned himself in the library with Rose, his feet kicked up on the table in front of the couch, the two of them watching telly while one of their children slept peacefully on his chest and the other curled against his bondmate and wife. In those quiet moments, while Rose lay so peacefully beside him, he was sure he could feel already feel the gentle weight there, nestled between his two hearts.
Soon, he told himself, and the knowledge that this was his future was enough to take his breath.
No, the idea of fatherhood wasn’t at all as terrifying as it should have been. He was confident in his ability to give these children, his precious children, the upbringing that he had never had. He would not only meet their physical needs for food and shelter, he would provide for their mental and emotional needs as well. His children would be taught to discover who they were, not who they were expected to be. His children would know what it was to be loved.
He put his hand on Rose’s belly sometimes and tried to communicate to the little ones everything his hearts felt for them, even if they weren't quite mature enough to receive it; promises of safety and love, attempts to make sure they knew that the universe they were coming into was not always the easiest place to be, but that he would do anything and everything to protect them.
The Doctor stepped out onto the balcony of their suite to look for Rose. He’d sent her down to the beach while he packed up their room and loaded the TARDIS so they could head to India. It had been a heavenly two weeks - just the Doctor and Rose, cherishing and enjoying each other.
He wasn’t usually big on resorts and had visited more of them with Rose than he had in the entire nine hundred years of his existence before he met her. But Rose deserved to be pampered, to be waited on hand and foot, to be treated like the goddess she was. So he took her to places where her needs and wants would be catered to, even if they weren’t exactly his cup of tea. The knowledge that she was being indulged and spoiled pleased him.
He spotted her down on the beach, reclined in one of the chairs that the resort provided their guests. The Doctor took a minute or two just to look at her lying there, to let himself feel the overwhelming pride, joy, and gratitude that that beautiful creature loved him and was his. And she was lovely, simply the most exquisite thing he’d ever seen.
There had been a crying spell when they first arrived and she saw herself in a bikini for the first time. He’d had to coax her out of the en suite, and when she’d come out her eyes had been red and puffy. The top of the purple bikini that she so often favored didn’t fit correctly anymore and her breasts spilled from the cups. Her softly rounded belly, the cradle in which their children were nestled, snug and safe, protruded in a gentle but ever-growing slope. The Doctor told her, truthfully, that he’d never seen anything as beautiful as she was. She’d cried harder, and he’d held her until she quieted.
Now, though, she was resting and ostensibly watching the rise and fall of the waves. One leg was bent and bare, her knee rising like a bronzed mountain peak through the opening of the translucent teal sarong she’d wrapped around herself. The black of the new bikini the TARDIS had provided made a nice contrast against her tan skin, glowing under the sun. Her hand rested gently on her belly, and the sun glinted from the diamonds in her ring.
All-in-all, the Doctor had never seen anything quite as alluring in all of his lives.
A young man appeared at her side, startling her. The Doctor’s eyes narrowed when he saw the man smiling down at Rose with sparkling white teeth. Rose returned the smile, and the man apparently took this as encouragement to sit down. The Doctor clenched his fists, his jaw tight while he watched the pretty boy make himself comfortable next to his wife. Rose chatted with the bloke and the Doctor’s heart burned with jealousy.
The handsome stranger was smiling at Rose, a smile full of perfectly-straight, white teeth...a smile that was quite probably used as a weapon for melting women’s knees on a frequent basis. A smile that was aimed right at his pregnant wife.
The Doctor felt his ability to reason start to ebb when the young bloke laughed, then winked at Rose.
He took a couple of moments to compose himself, forcing his hands and jaw to relax while he took a couple of deep breaths and named all of the moons of the Hano solar system. When he felt a bit less like the jealous husband he was, he plastered a smile on and started towards Rose.
She spotted him coming down the beach and he was appeased to see the bright, genuine smile light up her entire face when she saw him, then a bit ashamed when he saw the question and concern flicker behind her eyes after she took in his expression. It was gone soon enough, and the Doctor was sure that that look was meant to be mollifying. It worked.
“Doctor!” Rose beamed, reaching one hand out towards him. The Doctor took it and immediately felt the rush of affection and devotion that she sent him through their bond. He tried to hide the envy that seeing her with the pretty boy had created from her, but his clever Rose sensed it anyway. She responded with a softening of her smile towards him and a surge of love and reassurance. He took a deep breath, relieved.
Feeling secure again, he leaned down to kiss her soundly, splaying his hand protectively over her belly before he stood and turned an insincere smile towards the git who’d sat down next to Rose. “Who’s your friend?”
“Brian,” the other man volunteered, offering his hand.
The Doctor shook it and did his best not to upset Rose by looking menacing when he replied: “I’m the Doctor. And I believe you’ve met my wife, Rose.”
“Ah,” Brian recoiled, releasing his hand. The Doctor felt nothing but smug satisfaction when the other man made his excuses and scarpered off.
“Well, that was a bit less rude than usual,” Rose said, deadpan. “Well done, you.”
The Doctor tried unsuccessfully to hide a victorious little smirk when he sat down in the seat the little prat had just vacated. “What is it with you and pretty boys, anyway? You attract them like flies.”
Rose shrugged. “Doesn’t bother me. Shouldn’t bother you, either. Not anymore.”
He pondered her words while he lay back on the chair beside her, then reached over without looking to take her hand. It didn’t matter how secure he was in her love, he was fairly certain he’d never be alright with handsome young blokes flitting around her, seeking her attention. Rose just watched him from the corner of her eye, then snorted a laugh after a minute and changed the subject.
“Your mum needs one of those,” he said.
Rose looked up, confused. “One of what?”
He jerked his head in the direction Brian had walked. “A pretty boy.”
Rose touched her tongue to the corner of her mouth. “Nah. She doesn’t need one. She has Jack.”
The Doctor groaned and banished that thought from his mind forever.
“Did you finish up the spatial/temporal whatsit? Is that why you’re out here?” she asked.
He nodded, laying his head back against the chair. “Didn’t take long. We’re ready to go, whenever you want.”
“I dunno. Maybe we should stay here for a bit. You look awful relaxed and...beachy.”
“Oi!” he raised up to look at her, then down at his linen shirt and khaki shorts. “What’s wrong with how I’m dressed?”
She giggled. “Nothing. I’m just not used to seeing you out of your leather and boots. Outside our room, that is.” She gave him a cheeky, tongue-touched look then reached over and rubbed his cheek, smiling at the scruff she found there. “Not used to this, either.”
“I can go shave and put on m’coat now, if you want,” he offered, only partially serious.
“Nah,” she said, leaning back into her own chair. “I like the scruff. S’sexy. You should keep it.”
“Your wish is my command,” he smiled at her.
“I’m glad you came around, though,” Rose continued. “I was a bit worried about you for a while. We’re on the beach, Doctor, and I just knew you were going to stay in your heavy clothes. You’d have missed out on all of the most important beach experiences. Warm weather, wading through the surf, sand between your toes, lying in the sun...”
“Why would I want to get sand where it’s not supposed to be?” he interrupted.
“Oh, I don’t know,” she told him with a tongue-touched grin. “I can think of some fun ways to do it.”
“Minx.”
Rose didn’t look repentant in the least. “So India next, hmm?”
“That’s the plan, unless you don’t want to go.”
Rose shook her head. “It sounds lovely, actually.”
“It’s a beautiful culture.”
“Well, let’s go see it.” She started stirring, maneuvering herself to get up. The Doctor jumped to his feet and offered her a hand, which she took with a smile. He pulled her up and trapped her body close to his with an arm around her waist.
“I love you,” he said, smiling down at her.
“I love you, too.”
“Let’s go to India.”
“Yes, let’s.”
~*~O~*~
The Doctor emerged from their ensuite and walked to where Rose lay on the bed, holding out two pills for her.
“I told you curry wouldn’t be the best idea,” he teased.
“Shut up,” Rose grumbled, swallowing the pills.
“Those should knock back the worst of the symptoms in just a few minutes. Then we can go out to that street festival you saw, if you want.”
“What are they celebrating, Doctor?”
He shrugged. “I honestly don’t know. It isn’t a religious holiday or anything. Must be a local or civic thing.”
Rose quirked an eyebrow at him and rubbed circles on her belly. “You? Don’t know?”
He rolled his eyes at her. “Cheeky.”
She giggled, and he couldn’t help but smile. She scooted her legs out of the way when he moved to lay down beside her, propping his head on one elbow and resting his other hand over the swell of her belly.
“Doctor?”
“Hmm?”
“Why are you making us wait to find out about whether the babies are boys or girls?”
He sighed. They’d had this miniature argument multiple times before, and he knew that she was impatient. She wasn’t the only one - Jackie and, to a lesser extent, Jack were both needling him about it, too. What none of them seemed to understand was that he, himself, felt nigh desperate to lay eyes on his children again. It was only his bond with Rose that kept him from rushing her into the TARDIS’ infirmary. To be honest, he wasn’t sure how he’d survived so long without her as a stabilizing force.
“I’m trying to give you an authentic human experience for your time. Since humans don’t find out their babies’ sex until the twenty week anatomy scan, just seems best to do it then. Besides,” he continued, holding up a finger to stop her. “The earlier you try to find out, the more likely you are to get a false reading. The longer we wait, the more the babies will have developed and we’ll be able to see more clearly.”
Rose sighed, sounding quite put out. He’d told her all of this before, of course, but he understood her impatience.
“So we have an appointment at UNIT for next week? With the doctor who will be taking care of us?”
“Aye,” he said, going back to stroking her belly absently. “We’ll meet the new doctor. He’ll do an exam and then a scan.”
“He? I thought we would have a female doctor?”
“No, UNIT didn’t have a female on staff. Instead, we got the most senior medical doctor there. He has a background in obstetrics and a lengthy history with UNIT, so he’ll not be fazed by an extraterrestrial pregnancy.”
Rose huffed a little. “I don’t think I want a stuffy old man examining me.”
The Doctor gave her a lascivious grin. “You let this stuffy old man do -”
“Oh hush,” she admonished him, blushing. He backed down with a hearty laugh. “You know what I mean.”
“I do,” he agreed. “And we’ll have Kate keep looking for a female doctor to care for you. But in the meantime, we have to work with what we’ve got.” He leaned over and kissed her belly lightly. “Have to take care of you, Smidgen and Moppet.”
Rose raised a sardonic brow at him. “Smidgen and Moppet?”
“S’what I’m callin’ the babies. You like?”
“Doctor, we are not naming our children ‘Smidgen’ and ‘Moppet’.”
“I didn’t mean we should actually name them that. Just a little somethin’ to call ‘em while they’re still baking.”
Rose considered this for a moment, then smiled. “Works for me, I suppose.”
The Doctor felt oddly chuffed, but leaned over to Rose’s belly and put his mouth just to the side of his hand, speaking softly against her womb. “What about you guys? What do you think? Do your nicknames suit?”
He felt a nudge against the heel of his hand, then another against two of his fingers. Wide-eyed, he looked up at Rose to find her smiling.
“Was that-?” he started, his voice low, urgent.
Rose nodded, biting her lip a little. “I told you they get squirmy when you talk to them.”
He just looked up at her for a minute, feeling the gentle pushing under his hands, then bent back to plant a soft kiss over his children and whisper to them.
~*~O~*~
The Doctor was being incredibly sweet. He was more at ease now that they were back on Earth, and more comfortable in his own skin than she’d ever seen him since they’d bonded two weeks ago. He sought out reasons to touch her frequently, mostly unnecessary reasons that she knew were designed only to satisfy his craving for her contact.
She never denied him. To be honest, she craved the contact of his skin and mind more than she ever thought she would. It, along with the twins’ movement now, helped her feel more like herself and less like an incubator.
Rose had accepted months back that her body was not her own right now. The most she could do was try to sort out what it was telling her so that she could either take care of it or get the care she needed for herself and the babies. She had no frame of reference beyond the Doctor, her mother and a couple of books that meant to tell you what you should expect when you’re expecting, but she felt she was doing okay. So far, nothing really unusual had happened to her.
Well, besides being pregnant with the twin babies of her alien bondmate and husband, that is.
The Doctor had, uncharacteristically, left her to wander the street festival alone for a bit while she had henna tattoos drawn on her hands. The artist, a young woman about Rose’s age, had overheard the Doctor and Rose mention being ‘newlyweds’, and sought to congratulate Rose with a traditional bridal tattoo. Rose thought it seemed fun and the Doctor didn’t seem to have any qualms, so he just kissed her on the forehead and told her he’d be back for her in a while, telling her to have fun.
According to the young artist, the floral pattern she was drawing on Rose’s hands symbolized joy and beauty, but also the awakening and offering of one’s spirit. Rose had thought to herself that it was all quite appropriate: heavens knew that by creating a telepathic link to the Doctor, she’d opened herself to him spiritually and mentally.
When the artist pronounced Rose’s tattoos complete, Rose paid her and offered her thanks, standing.
A pain, sharp and hot, shot across the lower right side of her abdomen. It was gone as quick as it had come, however, and Rose didn’t have time to do more than frown at the middle distance and cover the spot on her belly with her hand before it was nothing more than a memory.
“Are you alright?” the artist asked, concerned.
“Fine,” Rose smiled, then thanked her again, stepping away from the booth to go find the Doctor.
She hadn’t walked more than fifteen steps away when the pain came back, searing into her belly on the lower right. She cried out this time, and it didn’t fade as fast. A couple of people looked at her, mildly concerned, but most ignored her. When the pain receded this time, it left residual discomfort in its wake.
Right. Time to find the Doctor. Right now.
Rose looked around, turning her head this way and that, trying to decide which way would be best to look for the Doctor. She had just started down an aisle when the pain came back, more intense than it had before.
“Doctor!” She cried out for him, her voice loud and frightened. Several people turned to look at her, but the Doctor’s blessed face did not appear as she curled her body around the pain in her abdomen. She winced as the pain flared again. “Doctor! Help!”
A gentle hand covered hers on her belly, and another slipped around her back, supporting her, guiding her.
“Easy, now, I’m a doctor. I’ve got you,” a young female said in Rose’s ear. She was surprised to hear a London accent so far from home, and looked up at her rescuer, wide-eyed.
Rose’s first thought of the woman who was cradling her and guiding her over to a seat beneath the nearest tent was that she was gorgeous, with lustrous black hair and dark skin. Her second thought was of how kind the young woman’s eyes were. She had spent nearly two years with the Doctor, out amongst the cosmos, meeting friends and foes alike, and in that time she’d become a fairly good judge of character. Rose felt instantly safe in this woman’s care.
“You’re a doctor?” she asked.
The other woman smiled. “I am. My name is Martha Jones. You’re going to be okay, Mrs….”
“Tyler,” Rose winced when she sat down in the chair that had been vacated for her. “Rose Tyler.”
“Alright, Mrs. Tyler -”
“Rose,” she interjected. “Call me Rose.”
“Only if you call me Martha,” the doctor replied with a smile. “Now, Rose, I’m going to give you the quickest exam I can just to get an idea of what’s going on here and what we should do next, alright?” Rose nodded, and Martha turned her head and snapped at one of the gathering crowd to fetch water. “I’m going to have to touch you, is that alright?”
Rose nodded, and Martha smiled reassuringly again. “Don’t worry, Rose. I’ve delivered loads of babies.”
“S’more than one baby,” Rose said, gritting her teeth. “S’twins.”
“Twins!” Martha said, pulling gloves out of her bag and not looking up at Rose. “How exciting! Is this your first pregnancy?”
“Yes,” Rose answered, and she blinked against the gathering tears in her eyes. She felt so guilty. If she’d known what to look for...what was happening…
“How far along are you, Rose?” Martha asked, palpating Rose’s belly.
“Nineteen weeks,” she said, then gave a sharp cry when Martha pressed gently against the spot that had been hurting.
“Oh, I’m sorry, love,” Martha cooed, then bent down to stroke that area of her belly, studying it intently. “Now, Rose, the words I’m about to say are going to sound scarier than they are. I’m certain that you and your babies are going to be just fine, but I have to ask these questions in order to know what I’m dealing with. Alright?”
Rose nodded, tears slipping from her eyes. It occurred to her, now, to ring the Doctor. She should have done that to begin with, she thought with no small amount of frustration. Rose pulled her phone from her shoulder bag and pressed a couple of buttons before handing it to the owner of the stall. “S’my husband, his name is Doctor,” she said in a watery voice by way of explanation. “Tell him where we are, please. And to hurry.” The older woman took the phone and began speaking into it rapidly.
“Alright, Rose,” Martha continued, her hand covering the place where the pain had lessened. “Do you have a history of fibroid tumors?” Rose shook her head, and Martha asked another. “Have you ever had any surgery on your uterus or cervix?”
Rose shook her head again, then straightened a little when she heard the Doctor’s booming voice calling her name from somewhere nearby. “Doctor!” she cried out.
Martha’s eyes flicked up to Rose’s. “Your husband?”
“Yes.”
“I need to keep an-”
“ROSE!” the Doctor bellowed as he elbowed through the crowd surrounding Rose. Fat tears spilled from her eyes when she saw him burst through and kneel beside her. “Ah, Rose, love, what happened?”
Rose couldn’t form words properly, her relief was too strong. Martha watched her for a second, and then spoke from her place, kneeling in front of Rose.
“You are Rose’s husband?” Martha asked.
“Yes. I’m the Doctor,” he answered shortly, seeming to notice Martha for the first time. “Who are you? What did you do to my wife?”
Rose admonished him gently and he apologized at once. “M’sorry for being gruff. But who are you? What happened?”
“My name is Dr. Martha Jones, and I’ve been taking care of your wife for the last few minutes. I need to get her back to my hospital and put her on some monitors, but -”
“What for?” the Doctor demanded.
Martha was undaunted. She’d undoubtedly seen countless terrified fathers before, but Rose still squeezed the Doctor and willed him to calm down.
“I’m certain that Rose and the babies will be fine, but I suspect uterine herniation. She’ll need to be monitored.”
The Doctor looked at Martha appraisingly, and Rose knew what was going on behind his eyes. She’d had the same thoughts, too.
“I like her,” Rose said quietly. The pain had receded a great deal, and she felt much more herself. Just twinges of pain remained. “She’s the kind of doctor I’d hoped for at UNIT.”
“Martha Jones, did you say?”
Martha nodded.
“What’re you doing here in India? Are you a doctor here?”
Martha nodded again. “I’m in the last week of a medical fellowship here. I’ll return home to London next week.”
“How long have you been a doctor?”
“Five years,” Martha answered easily.
“Any OB/GYN experience?” he asked, and Rose felt a pang of sympathy for Martha. She looked terribly confused and possibly a bit offended by his abrupt line of questioning, but she remained calm and even.
“That’s the fellowship I was just finishing. I did a year at the nearby obstetric hospital. It’s where I want to take Rose now,” she said pointedly. “Your wife needs to be monitored and more closely examined.”
The Doctor looked at her even more intently, then said in a low voice, “I’ve been doing Rose’s prenatal care m’self so far. Think I need to get her home to London, now.” He slipped his arms behind Rose’s knees and lifted her bridal-style, turning to leave.
“Doctor,” Rose whimpered a little. The movement had jarred her and brought a little of the pain back.
“If you please, Doctor,” Martha said in a challenging tone. “Your wife needs care right now. Please, let me stay with her as an objective caregiver.”
The Doctor stared at Martha, and Rose cleared her throat. “Let her come along, Doctor. I like her. I trust her.”
He blew out a breath. “Alright, fine,” he said. “But you’re in for the shock of your life.”
~*~O~*~
“I’m giving her clearance! She’s here with me!” the Doctor bellowed at a young man in uniform, whose nameplate identified him as Lt. Richards.
Rose’s pains had stopped and Martha assured him that she and the babies were just fine, so the Doctor was finally able to breathe again. But Martha still wanted to find a cause for the pains in the first place, which the Doctor thought was a fine idea. Rose had seemed to quite like the young woman, despite their short acquaintance. She'd even impressed him with her dedication to Rose; upon being faced with the paradox of the TARDIS interior, she took a brief, speculative look around and told him in no uncertain terms that he was really going to have to explain himself later. Martha Jones had won his allegiance when she turned right back to Rose, dismissing him, and continued her care, forestalling his explanation until Rose was stabilized. Rose had looked a bit smug at the expression on his face when she did.
Now, in the UNIT infirmary, he darted his eyes over to where Rose was being helped onto a medical bed by Martha and a nurse. The Doctor, chastised by a look his wife had shot him as she made herself somewhat comfortable on the bed, turned back to the lieutenant with a sigh of relief and gratitude on his lips.
“Martha Jones was there in an emergency and has been caring for my wife. I’ve the authority to give her clearance to be here, and I’m doing so. She will stay with my wife until she’s no longer needed or wanted.”
“I want her to stay,” Rose volunteered from the bed.
The Doctor looked down at the officer. “You’re welcome to take it up with Rose if you don’t like it, Lt. Richards. But I don’t suggest it. Fierce, that one is. And hormonal, too.”
“OI!” Rose made to sit up in the bed, outrage all over her face, but Martha shushed her and gently pushed her back down.
“See?” he crowed a little to the wide-eyed lieutenant, and could almost feel the scowl burning into the back of his head.
“You’re asking for a smack, you are.”
“Sir?” A young woman in a UNIT uniform came running up, looking at the Doctor, then stopped abruptly and saluted him.
The Doctor rolled his eyes. “Don’t salute me, lass,” he said with a note of exasperation in his voice. Behind him, Rose snickered.
“Yes, sir,” she replied, and he could tell her hand was twitching to salute again.
“What is it?” he asked her.
“Corporal Branch, sir. There are two people upstairs at the checkpoint. A man and woman. They say they know you and are demanding to get in."
“That’ll be Mum and Jack,” Rose said.
“So let them in,” the Doctor said simply.
“We can’t, sir. The gentleman has part of an access code written on his hand, but it’s smudged and we can’t be sure it’s an actual code.”
“It is. I gave it to him.”
“But sir," the young corporal insisted, "protocol states he has to have the entire code to gain entry, and he only has five of eight digits.” The Doctor opened his mouth to respond to her, but she cut him off. “Please, sir, the woman is getting quite...belligerent.”
The Doctor scrubbed his face in frustration. “I just bet she is.”
"Oi!"
He turned to her, ignoring her mock outrage and the quirk of her lips, the question in his eyes.
“Go on, Doctor. I’m fine. No pain or anythin’,” Rose urged him. She was smiling now, but it settled his nerves only a little.
He looked over at Martha for confirmation that she would be safe, and Martha nodded. “She’s fine, Doctor, and it’ll be another few minutes before we’re ready to do the scan.”
The Doctor nodded briskly and turned back around to the young female officer. “Five minutes. I’d better be back down here in five minutes,” he emphasized by holding up the five fingers on his right hand. “There’d best not be any hangups.”
“Yes, sir. Understood, sir,” the young woman said, and stopped herself just short of saluting. He struggled to keep from rolling his eyes.
“And you,” he turned to the other young officer, the man, “Dr. Jones had best be here when I get back, or it’s on your head,” he said sternly. The young officer just swallowed heavily and nodded.
The Doctor turned around to Rose and kissed her softly. “I’ll be right back, love.”
“Go,” she said, smiling up at him. “Mum is probably barmy by now. You’d best get up there before she gets arrested for assault on a UNIT officer.”
The Doctor grinned at her, then kissed her forehead and lay his hand on her belly between the monitors strapped there. “Take care of these two.”
She gave him a playful push. “Go, I said.”
He smiled at her one last time, then turned on his heel to face the young woman who was waiting at attention with a much more serious expression on his face. “Right. Let’s go.”
~*~O~*~
“Doctor!” Jackie cried, launching herself past the guards in her way and throwing her arms around his neck for only a second before she stepped back, her hands still on his arms. “Where’s Rose? Is she okay?”
“She’s fine, Jackie.”
“What happened?” Jack demanded, sidestepping the same stunned-looking guards.
The Doctor held up a finger, indicating he should wait, and turned to the uniformed men and women in the room. “Who’s in charge here?”
“I am, sir. Sergeant Moore.” An officer, the most decorated in the room, stepped forward and raised his hand to salute.
“Don’t salute,” the Doctor said in a short, commanding tone, and the officer stopped at once. “This is Jacqueline Tyler and Captain Jack Harkness. I’m the Doctor and my clearance code is 6835834. They are with me, and we will be going downstairs to the infirmary.”
“But sir,” Sgt. Moore started.
The Doctor raised an eyebrow. “Problem?”
The sergeant shook his head and took a step backwards. “No, sir.” He raised his hand to wave back the other guards.
The Doctor nodded, satisfied, then held his arm out, gesturing for Jack and Jackie go ahead of him.
Once they were clear of the room, Jackie burst into questions. “Where’s Rose? Is she okay? What happened?”
The Doctor got to the lift at the end of the hall and entered a code, causing the door to open. “She had some sharp pains in her abdomen. They’ve stopped now, she’s fine. We don’t know what happened but she’s with a doctor, Dr. Martha Jones, whom she really likes. Martha has been taking care of her. They’re doing some testing now to figure out what caused the pains.” He turned around and looked at Jackie sternly. “Now don’t you go upsetting her, Jackie Tyler.”
Jackie drew herself up to her full height and huffed, “Oi! Just because you boss these people around doesn’t mean you get to boss me!”
Jack smirked at him from over her shoulder, and the Doctor looked up at the ceiling, blowing out a huge breath. “We’re trying to keep her calm, Jackie. Just….don’t upset her. Alright?”
Jackie crossed her arms and looked away from him, muttering about bloody aliens.
The lift doors opened and the Doctor led the trio out of the lift into the hallway. He rounded the corner into Rose’s room and felt more than saw a pink-tracksuited blur whoosh by him towards Rose.
“Rose!” Jackie cried, catching Rose’s outstretched hand. “Are you alright?”
“M’alright, Mum. Just some pains. No big deal.”
“You scared us, Rosie.” Jack slipped around to the other side of her bed and kissed her hair. The Doctor tamped down the flare of jealousy that rose in him, reminding himself that this was Jack, and cursing the hormonally protective instinct that had been so conspicuous lately.
Rose smiled up at Jack reassuringly. “M’fine. I was in good hands, after all. Martha and the Doctor took wonderful care of me.”
Martha blushed, and Jack stepped forward to offer his hand to her with a grin. “Hi there, Captain Jack Harkness,” he said with a disarming twinkle in his eye. Martha’s blush deepened and she ducked her head.
“Time and a place, Harkness,” the Doctor growled.
He looked up at the Doctor, the very picture of innocence. “I was just saying hello,” he protested.
“I don’t mind,” Martha told the Doctor, earning a click of the tongue. She turned back to Jack. “I'm Martha Jones.”
“Charmed, Dr. Jones,” Jack cooed, bending over Martha’s hand.
“Oh, stop it,” the Doctor said, frustrated.
Jack just gave him a cheeky, unrepentant grin.
“The Doctor says that you took care of my girl?” Jackie asked.
“Yes,” Martha said, snapping out of Jack’s spell with a blink and miniscule shake of her head. “Yes, I have been.”
“She’s been brilliant,” Rose chimed in.
Martha pooh-poohed her. “S’nothing,” she said.
“You’re going to do some tests to find out what happened?” Jack asked, much more serious now.
“Yes. She’s been on a fetal monitor and the babies sound fine. Their movement is good, and Rose hasn’t had any more pain,” Martha supplied. “The last thing we’ll do is an ultrasound to check on them.”
“We’ll get to see the babies?” Jackie asked, her voice higher than usual. Martha nodded, and Jackie clapped her hands excitedly. The Doctor couldn’t help his small smile.
“When will you be doing that?” the Doctor asked, circling around to the side of the bed Jack was occupying and taking Rose’s hand, displacing the Captain. Excitement and happiness slipped through their bond towards him, and he returned them to Rose, along with relief that she was okay.
“Right now, if you like,” Martha shrugged.
Jackie squealed a little and Rose nodded. “Yes, please.”
The Doctor took a seat beside Rose while Martha exposed her belly. He grinned a little when Rose jumped from the cold gel. “Alright there?”
“S’cold.”
“Sorry,” Martha said absently, pulling the machine over to herself.
The Doctor reached over and snatched the wand from Martha’s hand before she could put it to Rose’s belly.
“Oi!” Jackie cried, clearly ready to see her grandchildren.
He ignored her, focusing on Martha instead. “Before you do this,” he said. “There’s a couple of things you need to know.”
“Alright?” she said, curious.
“The babies have two heartbeats. Each,” he supplied. “They’re part-human, but also part-Gallifreyan. That last bit’s my doing.” The Doctor pointed his thumb at himself, giving her a proud little look-how-clever-I-am smile.
Martha peered at him. “You’re alien, then?”
“Yeah. S’that alright?” he asked, watching carefully for her reaction.
She studied him for a second, then nodded. “Explains about the phone box, then." She looked at Rose. “And you? You’re...?”
“Me? I’m depressingly human,” Rose chirped.
Martha nodded and looked back to the Doctor. “Anything else I need to know?”
“Externally, humans and Gallifreyans are identical, but their internal organs are probably going to look different than you're used to. They’ll likely have two livers, for example, but the skeletal structure is essentially the same.” He ignored the muttering from Jackie on the other side of the bed and nodded to Martha. “I’ll be able to tell if there’s anything seriously wrong.”
“It sounds like I have a lot to catch up on.” Martha spoke with curiosity and confidence, and the Doctor was reassured by her tone.
“So you’ll stay on, then?” Rose asked, sounding hopeful.
“If you’d like,” Martha smiled at her.
“I’ll sit down with you later and tell you everything you need to know,” the Doctor volunteered. “And I have a couple of books you could borrow.”
“Oh would you just get on with it!?” Jackie burst out. “Want to see my grandbabies before I go grey, me.”
A smart comment about hair dye sprang to the Doctor’s lips, but Rose squeezed his hand and he clamped his mouth shut.
“Ready?” Martha asked Rose. She nodded, and the Doctor handed the wand back to Martha. She put the wand into the gel on her belly, sliding it around and looking at the screen.
“That’s baby B…” she said, and the Doctor’s hearts stuttered. The image on the screen was clearly recognizable as a baby.
Rose squeezed his hand. “That’s our baby,” she whispered. He just nodded, worried he’d choke on his emotions if he tried to speak. Jack clapped him on the shoulder, but the Doctor didn’t look up.
“Oh, Rose,” Jackie murmured. “Look at you. That’s a baby.”
“And here’s the other one,” Martha said, sliding the wand downwards. "Baby A."
Rose sniffled beside him, but he didn’t feel capable of looking away from the screen. Instead, he just kissed her hand in his.
“Can you tell what was wrong with Rosie?” Jack asked.
“Yeeees,” Martha dragged out slowly, still scrutinizing the image on the screen. “It looks like Rose has a small uterine hernia.”
“What’s that mean?” Rose asked, alarmed.
“It means that the wall of your uterus has a weak spot in it and may bulge a bit. One of the babies must have kicked it, directly and hard, to make it hurt like that.”
“Is it dangerous?” Jackie asked, breathless.
“Uterine hernias can be very serious,” Martha stated, her voice clinical. “But this one is quite small, and we caught it early.”
“Is it going to get worse?” Rose inquired, speaking over the Doctor who was poised to ask the same question. This was not something he’d ever encountered.
“It could,” Martha answered slowly, her eyes never leaving the screen. “There will certainly be more pressure on it as the pregnancy advances. How far along did you say you were?”
“Nineteen weeks and two days,” the Doctor supplied. Rose smiled up at him.
“The babies are measuring at about sixteen, sixteen and a half weeks.”
“Gallifreyan babies run a bit smaller than humans,” the Doctor answered.
“Ah. That explains it.”
“So she’s going to be okay,” Jack reiterated.
“Should be,” Martha said, turning away to smile at Jack, then back to Rose. “I don’t know what your activity level is now, but if you’re incredibly active you’re going to have to curtail it some. No exercises beyond walking and swimming. No lifting more than fifteen pounds, possibly twenty.”
“She won’t be,” the Doctor answered before Rose got a chance.
“We might be looking at a bedrest close to the end of your pregnancy,” Martha said, glancing back at the screen. “But for now, you just need to be careful about how much you lift and take it a bit easier than most.”
The Doctor took a deep breath. Could have been much worse.
“Will the pains happen again?” Jackie wanted to know.
“Possibly. Probably. More towards the end of the pregnancy, as the babies get bigger and stronger.”
“Great,” Rose muttered, and the Doctor bent to kiss her brow, sending her a wave of reassurance through their bond.
“You should be fine, though,” Martha continued, still moving the wand around her belly. “The babies look great. Two heartbeats each, at just the right pace. And they’re supposed to have two livers...what about an extra pair of ribs?”
“Aye,” the Doctor answered.
“Okay then,” Martha answered, and once again the Doctor was impressed with her ability to deal with such an overload of unusual information. “The sooner I can sit down and chat with you about anatomical differences, the better.”
“No problem,” he agreed.
Martha smiled, then turned around and looked at them. “Would you like to know whether the babies are boys or girls?”
Three voices around the Doctor gave a resounding yes, but he just nodded.
Martha smiled and looked back at the screen.
Notes:
TO BE CONTINUED...
*evil laugh*
I had a uterine hernia with my youngest, so this complication is based on my own experience.
I've been incredibly excited about bringing Martha in. Even though I know she wasn't an OB/GYN, let's just pretend for the sake of this fic, yeah?
It's worth noting that I know absolutely nothing about military ranks, so forgive me if this is wrong.
Chapter 19: The Calm
Summary:
Rose and the Doctor settle into their new home.
Notes:
Here it is! Time for the big reveal!
The babies are ____________!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
*~*~*Twenty-one Weeks*~*~*
The Doctor was a Time Lord. He knew Time inside and out. He was constantly aware of it swirling around him, always able to judge the exact amount of time that had passed, how it had passed and, in most cases (when he really tried), knew what should be, could be, should never be and could never be.
Time Lords were meant to have this incredible ability, and the Doctor was no exception. He was the only being in the universe that did.
But he had absolutely no clue what had happened to the last two weeks, since they’d come back from India. It had been an absolute whirlwind.
Jackie had attempted to take Rose shopping immediately after finding out about the sex of the babies, wanting to leave directly from UNIT and head to the baby store. The Doctor had insisted that Rose rest after her health scare. Jackie had pouted a bit, but finally gave in when Rose sided with the Doctor, telling her mother gently that she was tired. Jackie had pouted a bit more but surrendered quietly overall. A quiet but mighty sulk, that is.
Jack and Jackie had taken Rose back to the flat while the Doctor did what was necessary to secure proper clearance for Martha. He took her to meet with Kate Lethbridge-Stewart, who had almost immediately offered her a job as a consultant for UNIT. Martha, looking a bit perplexed, had agreed to accept the position if someone would please explain to her just what was going on, now that the crisis had passed. The Doctor had explained a bit, enough to appease her for the moment, promising to meet with her soon and explain more. Kate had promised to fill in what the Doctor had left out before she sent her off with her assistant, Osgood, to file the necessary new-hire paperwork, leaving the Doctor and Kate to discuss logistics for the next few months. The Doctor was impatient to get home to Rose, however, and had little patience. He left not long after Martha.
Rose had only rested for a day before she was up and raring to go out with her mother, shopping for the babies. The Doctor had sighed, resigned to going along, but Jack announced that he was taking him out to celebrate. The Doctor couldn’t easily get drunk on 21st century alcohol, of course, but that didn’t matter to Jack. He simply tugged the Doctor into his sporty little car and took off to the local.
The Doctor, of course, had to drive once they left, owing to Jack’s slightly inebriated state. He’d made the mistake, however, of pulling over at a car dealership, citing the need for a car. Jack immediately started pulling the young man who approached them, cranking the charm all the way up. The Doctor attempted to get him to stop, but let him get on with it when it appeared that the salesman was willing to give him a better deal because of Jack's flirting. By the time all of the paperwork was signed on a brand new blue SUV for himself and Rose, Jack was able to drive himself back to Jackie’s flat.
To the Doctor’s great surprise (and slight alarm), they beat Rose and Jackie back by nearly an hour, and when the two women arrived they each carried several large bags. They promptly handed these off to the Doctor and Jack before Rose collapsed on her mother’s sofa. The Doctor grumbled only a little before he carried them into the TARDIS for storage. At least Jackie was making tea, which consoled him a little. Jackie really did make fantastic tea.
He was pleased to see that Rose and Martha had become fast friends. The two women went out to lunch frequently, and Rose always came home in high spirits. When Rose wasn’t with Martha, she darted around town with her mum. The Doctor went with them once and decided quickly that once was enough. He worried about Rose's well-being while he wasn't around, especially now that there was a complication in the pregnancy, but Rose was only willing to take so much of the kid-glove treatment before she got annoyed and let him know just how irritating he was being. Once he saw Rose with Jackie for a while, he didn't worry nearly as much. Jackie's protective, maternal instinct was almost as strong as his and she clucked around, forcing Rose to take it easy and never allowing her to carry very much. Rose submitted to her mother much more gracefully than she did to him. Seeing that Rose was in loving, protective hands, the Doctor had bowed out of their shopping trips. He'd hang behind until he was needed, which he suspected would happen eventually.
The Doctor filled his time instead with things he felt needed to be done: meeting with Martha to discuss his anatomy and what to expect from a Time Lord pregnancy, pestering the contractor and workers at the manor to hurry, trying to stop Jack from pulling every human in London, and - his personal favorite - tinkering on the TARDIS aimlessly...although he did come out from under the console and make appearances in Jackie's flat on the (all-too-frequent) evenings that Mickey dropped by after he got off work.
Jack was acclimating to life in the 21st century remarkably well, although the Doctor really shouldn't have been surprised. He'd spent a month in the 21st century with Das a few months ago after all, trying to get him acclimated to life among humans.
The Captain had spent the two weeks that the Doctor and Rose were traveling (and he wasn’t supervising the work at the house) watching telly with Jackie and going to pubs, looking to pick up more of the customs and mannerisms of the local population in 21st century London, and he had done a remarkable job. If he’d made a few pulls in the meantime, the Doctor didn’t want to know.
Jack had done a good job in the Doctor's absence, though: the house was nearly ready for them to move in a bit ahead of schedule, and the Doctor thought it couldn’t happen fast enough. He was quite ready to get out of the city.
Finally, after two weeks, (two weeks, two days, six hours and 31 minutes, to be precise), it was time for the Doctor and Rose to move in into their new home. Jackie, of course, cried, even though Rose assured her that they would be back frequently and she could come visit any time, that her room was ready for her whenever. The Doctor cringed at this pronouncement. He wasn’t exactly excited about having his mother-in-law practically move in, which he suspected she’d do if she didn’t have to work.
The Doctor had worried a bit about just what Rose was going to do to the rooms she’d had decorated, particularly when under the influence of her mother. He needn’t have. She had done a beautiful job, and every room she’d touched turned out quite elegant. The Doctor attributed that solely to Rose, recoiling a bit when she informed him that her mother had made quite a lot of suggestions that Rose had simply agreed with.
At long last, the Doctor and Rose were able to move into the manor and found themselves on their first night lying in their bed in their new home. Rose leaned against the headboard, stroking her fingers through the Doctor’s hair while he lay propped on an elbow beside her, absently drawing circles and lines on her belly.
“I like your hair,” she said. “You’ve let it grow a bit.”
“A bit,” he agreed. “Not so much. Don’t want to look shaggy, me.”
“You don’t look shaggy,” she assured him. “S’nice. Soft. S’not so severe as it was before.”
“You didn’t like it before?”
“I loved it before. I just like having something to grab hold to now.”
He turned his head to look up at her with slightly widened eyes. She responded by giving him a tongue-touched grin.
He shook his head and muttered. “Cheeky little minx.”
She giggled, not at all sorry, and he stretched up to give her a quick kiss, settling back down beside her and going back to doodling on her belly.
“Did I tell you I ran into Shareen yesterday while I was out with Mum and Martha?”
“You didn’t.”
“She’s a waitress at the cafe we were eating at, and ended up with our table. Bit surprised to see this,” she indicated her ring, “and this, she was.” She stroked her belly.
The Doctor chuckled a bit. “I’ll bet she was.”
“Had to catch Mum before she told Shareen how far along we were, since this pregnancy is going to go on a bit longer. When I told her I was only a few weeks, she didn’t believe me, I don’t think. But s’alright.”
“Good thinking, though, on your part.”
“Ta. We’re going to meet for lunch and to get our nails done day after tomorrow. It’ll be nice to catch up.” The Doctor made a noncommittal sound, then Rose went on, almost hesitantly. “She asked after you, you know.”
He blinked up at her in surprise. “After me? What’d she want to know about me for?”
Rose rolled her eyes, a mirror of his ‘dribbled-on-your-shirt’ look. “She knows I’m married now. Wants to know about my husband. I told her I’d married the bloke I’d been travelling with and she crowed a bit, saying she always knew we were more than just mates.”
“Glad she knew, even if we didn’t.”
Rose smiled indulgently, reminiscing. “No, we weren’t always. Told her so a bunch of times, but apparently she knew better."
"So did Jack, apparently."
"Yeah, he did." She hesitated for a minute before she went on. "She’d like to meet you, you know.”
“No, ta.” The Doctor turned back to her belly, and Rose didn’t argue with him. This time. He knew he was on borrowed time, so far as meeting her friends went. He’d have to meet them at some point; Rose had always missed her friends and would very likely want them around with the babies coming. She was not likely to be put off for long.
“What are you drawing?” she asked.
“M’not drawing,” he informed her. “M’writing.”
“Now who’s cheeky? Go on then, what are you writing?”
He shrugged. “Just scribbling. The babies’ names at the mo’.”
Rose quirked an eyebrow at him. “We haven’t decided on names. Haven’t even talked about it, really.”
“I know. I’m writing ‘Smidgen’ and ‘Moppet’.”
She laughed and stroked her fingers through his hair again, scratching the back of his scalp. “I picked up a book of baby names while I was out with Mum a week or so ago. We can start going through it if you like. I’m just not sure I’m quite on board with those nicknames.”
“Why not?” he challenged, looking up at her again.
It was her turn to shrug. “Just seem silly to me. Nicknames like that. Doesn't even have anything to do with their real names, not that they have real names just yet.”
“Lots of people have nicknames, Rose. You think I was just named ‘Doctor’ when I was loomed?”
“You weren’t?”
“Nope.”
“So what’s your real name?”
He shook his head. “Can’t tell you just yet, love. Can only tell you when we’ve fully bonded.”
Rose furrowed her brow and he raised up again to plant a quick kiss on her pouting lips.
“Now then, none of that. You’ll find out. And you’ll be the only other person in time and space to know it. But it has to be kept secret until then.”
“Why?”
“There’s great power in a name, Rose. Even greater in a Time Lord’s name.”
“So I assume we won’t be naming the children anything Gallifreyan.” It wasn't a question, and her ability to read him like a book surprised him again, just like it always did.
He shook his head. “No. I’d prefer to give them a human name.”
Rose bent down and kissed the top of his head. “Okay. That’s what we’ll do then. Whatever you want.”
The Doctor gave her a mischievous grin. "Whatever names I want, eh?"
"Don't push it."
He went back to staring at her belly, watching it with a small smile on his face.
“Doctor?”
“Hmm?”
“Been meaning to tell you...I felt a little something yesterday.”
He looked up, suddenly tense and alarmed. “Are you alright? Should we call Martha?”
Rose shook her head, taking his hand and squeezing it in reassurance. “No, no. Nothing like that. I meant…” She struggled for a minute, like she was trying to find the right words. “Mentally, I mean. Like when we’re communicating, except really, really faint.”
His eyes widened in surprise. “Do you think -”
A serene smile lit her face. “I think so. I think it’s the babies.”
The Doctor sat up quickly, pulling Rose’s shirt up to uncover her belly and covered her bump with his large, work-roughened hands.
“What are you doing?”
“Bit of hush,” he admonished, eyes closed and head bowed. “M’trying to sense them.”
He concentrated, focusing intently on sensing the babies. There was something there...tiny. Faint. It was wrapped up in Rose’s consciousness, and he tried hard to separate them.
There. Two thin, frail little threads wrapped around Rose’s thicker, stronger consciousness. He smiled and immediately began communicating love and peace to them.
Rose went back to stroking his hair, but he barely noticed. He was busy.
After a few moments, when he was as certain as it was possible to be that they felt him, he lay back down beside Rose and rubbed circles over them, whispering against her skin in Gallifreyan. The babies, as they always did, responded to him with wriggling and kicks.
“They love you,” Rose told him in a soft voice.
The Doctor spoke to them for a few more seconds, then kissed the skin of her bump lightly, looking at it reverently. “And I love them.”
“Did they tell you anything?”
“Nah. They’re still too little to communicate anything. But they’re there, and they’re developing as they should. A bit quicker than I expected, actually.”
“Is that alright?” Rose’s voice sounded just a bit worried.
“Yeah, s’fine.” He sounded unconcerned, rubbing a large circle over her with the flat of his palm.
Rose slid herself downwards, adjusting her shirt as she went and the Doctor raised his arm to accommodate her. She maneuvered herself, with his arm hovering above her, until she was lying flat beside him.
“Hello,” she said, smiling.
He draped his arm over her, brushing her hair from her face. “Hello.”
“Just thought I might try to steal a little attention for myself.”
He smirked a bit. “Jealous, are we? Gonna have a bit of a sulk?”
Rose rolled her eyes. “No, nothing like that. Just fancied a cuddle.”
“What a fantastic idea. I think I can manage that.” He stretched his arm out and under her neck, cradling her in his elbow. His other hand crossed her body and tugged, rolling her to face him. She melted into him with a contented chuckle, taking her usual place with her head nuzzled under his chin, arm slung across him and her leg situated between his.
She let out a happy little sound and the Doctor bent his head to kiss her hair. “Better?” he asked.
“Loads better,” she agreed, and he smiled into the middle distance above her head.
“Good.”
They lay like that for a while, wrapped up in a comfortable embrace, each just enjoying the company of the other. The Doctor felt Rose’s warm, humid breath against his chest growing slower and more regular, and he rubbed her back in a soothing up-and-down motion along her spine, silently encouraging her to let sleep take her. As much as he missed her while she was in bed, asleep, he knew that carrying the babies was taxing on her body and she needed the rest. She'd been on her feet a lot during the move, and she was likely overtired. He also knew that she slept better when he was nearby, so he’d taken to sitting up in bed beside her daydreaming, reading or occasionally watching telly if he wasn’t holding her as he was now.
There was a tiny squirming against his belly and looked down to her bump nestled between them.
“Oi,” he said in the softest possible voice, barely above a whisper. “Keep it down in there. Mummy’s trying to sleep.”
Rose gave a little laugh and wriggled in his arms, getting more comfortable, kissing the bare skin revealed by the ‘v’ of his vest.
“They’re quite inconsiderate, aren’t they?” she murmured.
“Mmm,” he agreed, going back to rubbing her back.
They squirmed again and she spoke to them without moving from her position in his arms. “You lot to to sleep, yeah? Daddy’s mine for a bit.”
Daddy, he marveled, squeezing her. Daddy.
He felt her smile against the skin she’d just kissed a few moments ago. “Yes, Doctor. Daddy.”
“You heard that?” he asked, raising his head to peer down at her, surprised.
She opened her eyes and smiled at him, softly. “Not exactly. I felt a rush of emotions and guessed.”
The Doctor hadn't meant to send that to her. He lowered his mouth to hers for a soft kiss before they both resumed their positions.
“You were right,” he said, stroking her hair, then trailing his hand down to her back “I thought I’d processed it all, but then seeing them on the screen...made it all a bit more real, that did.”
“S’that alright?” she asked, her voice tinged with a thread of worry.
“More than. Just trying to prep myself for the reality of Moppet and Smidgen being here in a few months. Thirty four weeks and six days, if these two do what they’re supposed to.”
Rose gave a low chuckle. “Doubt they will. They’re your babies, after all.”
“Oi,” he said, trying unsuccessfully to hide a smile, peering down at her again. “You’re the jeopardy-friendly one.”
She didn't favor him with a look. “Alright then, Doctor. Whatever you say.”
“You are,” he insisted stubbornly and tucked her head back under his, against him.
“You reckon we should actually talk about names?” she asked after a minute.
“Could do. What’d you have in mind?”
“I dunno, really. Maybe gender-neutral names? Riley? Jayden?”
“No,” he said flatly.
“Taylor?” she suggested, a teasing note in her voice.
“Taylor Tyler?” He snorted. “You’re takin’ the mick.”
“I am.” She giggled. “Cameron? Jordan?”
“No and no,” he replied, pulling her closer. “Not happening. Not to my babies.”
She snickered again. “M’just teasin, Doctor.”
“We’ve got plenty of time," He deflected, trying not to let all the relief he felt flow through their connection. "Thirty five weeks, unless they keep developing more quickly that I expected.”
“Thirty five weeks. That’s…” She paused, and he could almost hear her calculating. “Eight months!” she cried.
“Now, now,” he hushed her. “It won’t be s’bad.”
“It’s just a long time to think about being so...big.”
“I know, love. But it’s not forever.”
She let out a long breath. “I know.”
“We’ll make it together, yeah?”
“Of course. Together,” she agreed. He hugged her a little tighter, just for a second, just because he could.
“And then, when it’s all said and done, we’ll have two beautiful baby girls.”
Rose hummed. “That’ll be nice.” She paused for a second, then went on, “I hope they look like you.”
He pulled away from her, looking down in mock scandal. “Rose Tyler! Are you wishing these ears and this nose on innocent babies? Surely you don’t want our girls to have this daft face!”
She brought her hand up to his face. “I love your daft face. Ears, nose and all. S’gorgeous.”
The Doctor made a disbelieving noise. “Barmy, you are.”
“Am not.” Rose snuggled back into her place against him.
He was quiet for a while, letting himself build castles in the air a bit. Or perhaps, in this case, dollhouses.
In his mind’s eye, he saw two tiny pink bundles, one in Rose’s arms and the other in his. Rose was rocking the baby she held, looking tired but happy. He had the impulse to bend and kiss her, but that was nothing new. But, instead of disrupting her, he kissed then sang to the little one in his own arms, swaying on the spot.
He saw a pair of little girls with Rose’s caramel-brown eyes, running around the console making all manner of ruckus, then running to him and calling him ‘Daddy’ in their sweet, childish voices. He’d scoop them up, one in each arm, and swing them around once before setting them back down and chasing them around the console himself, pretending to be whatever monster he and Rose had told them about last storytime.
Two little girls looking up at him, gaining their hearts’ desire with nothing more than a smile.
Oh, he was in so much trouble.
He couldn’t be any happier about it.
Notes:
This fic was posted two months ago today...wow! Doesn't seem like that long! Hope you've been enjoying it. :)
Some chapters kind of roll out of me onto the (metaphorical) paper, some go down kicking and screaming. This chapter was the former, and I hope you liked it! The next two, though...well, we'll see.
From the bottom of my heart, I thank you for reading, for your comments, for your support (and I've really needed it during some chapters). Your response to this fic has made me feel like a million dollars, and I appreciate every single one of you.
Coming soon... [redacted due to spoilers]!
Chapter 20: The Storm
Summary:
"The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind.
The kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday."
~Baz Luhrmann"If you want to see the sunshine, you have to weather the storm."
~Frank Lane
Notes:
Please remember for the next couple of chapters, how I said very early on that this fic would reference events from canon and possibly even use them, but would be very different.
There are a couple of episodes referenced over the next couple of chapters, so I'm putting out a blanket statement here: Any recognizable dialogue came from Doctor Who and not my own mind.
Beta'd by TenRoseForeverAndEver, but all mistakes are mine.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
*~*~*Twenty-four Weeks*~*~*
“Doctor,” Rose chided him. “It will not harm you in any way to spend the afternoon and evening with my mother. It’s visiting, tea, and games.”
“You don’t know that. It just might,” he sulked.
Jack laughed from behind him.
Rose squinted at her husband, looking quite put out. “I have only seen her once in the three weeks since we moved. She and I went shopping the once, but other than that you’ve had me all to yourself. You can share, Doctor.” He opened his mouth to protest, but she cut him off. “I love her, too, you know.”
The Doctor felt small. He knew that Jackie and Rose were close, that for most of Rose's life (and Jackie's, too, for that matter) they had been all the other had in the world. It always made him feel selfish when Rose pointed out, even inadvertently, that she missed time with her mother. He didn’t even like to think about the missing year.
Rose must have seen his internal conflict scribbled on his face because she stood up on tiptoe to kiss his cheek. “Come on then, don’t pout. Just be nice to my mum for a bit. Yeah? You two get on so much better now.”
“Yeah,” he agreed. It wasn’t that he didn’t like Jackie. He could deal with her quite easily now, most days. If he were being honest, Jackie wasn’t the problem. The problem was entirely him, and the fact that he was a selfish bastard who wanted Rose all to himself.
Jack clapped him on the shoulder in a bracing gesture. “Come on, Doc. At least you’ll get some tea!”
The Doctor gave Jack a glare. Traitor.
Rose didn’t bother knocking, as it always frustrated her mother when she did that. Jackie insisted that her flat was still Rose’s home and said ‘you never have to knock at home, Rose’. Rose opened the door and led the way into the flat.
“Mum! We’re here!”
Jackie stepped out of the kitchen wiping her hands on a dishcloth and went to her daughter. “Rose!” She hugged Rose close, then stepped back and put her hands on Rose’s tummy. “How are my granddaughters?”
“Busy. Squirmy,” Rose laughed, releasing her mother and stepping towards the lounge.
Jackie moved on to Jack, dropping a kiss on his cheek and patting it fondly. “You behavin’?”
“Not at all.” Jack gave her the 1000-watt smile that only he was capable of and the Doctor rolled his eyes.
“And you,” she said, moving on to the Doctor. She grabbed him in a hug and kissed his cheek as she had Jack. He allowed it, reminding himself that Rose loved her, and Jackie wasn’t actually quite so bad once you got to know her.
A voice came from around the corner, in the lounge. “Hey, babe.”
The Doctor stiffened, darting his eyes towards Rose. She was enveloped in a warm hug from Mickey, and he felt his blood run hot.
“Now, now,” Jackie said in a low voice, patting his cheek. “Be nice.”
He mumbled a protest. “M’always nice.”
Jackie scoffed then went back to whatever she had been doing, with Jack just behind her.
“Jackie,” he heard from around the corner, in the kitchen, “can I just take a moment to tell you how extraordinarily beautiful you look?”
The Doctor rolled his eyes and refrained from letting loose with the snarky comment that sprung to mind about velour tracksuits not typically being part of one’s beauty regimen. He turned instead and went into the lounge to rescue Rose from Mickey.
Mickey was just plopping down onto the sofa and Rose was taking a seat at the opposite end much more delicately. The Doctor sat between the two of them, forcing Mickey over a couple of inches, and wrapped his arm around Rose. She gave him a knowing smirk and sent him a wave of reassurance through their bond. He refrained from sending her the smug satisfaction he felt, and just gave her a self-satisfied smile.
“Footie, eh? Might have known. Who’s playing?” Rose asked, settling under the Doctor’s arm. Where she belonged, he groused to himself.
“Manchester United and West Ham.”
“Who’s winning?” she asked politely.
“Nobody, yet. Match just started.” He turned to the Doctor and gave him an appraising, almost suspicious, look. “Who’re you rooting for?”
“Nobody,” the Doctor answered simply. “Don’t keep up with football, me.”
“You’re not into footie?” Mickey asked, sounding astounded.
The Doctor shrugged. “I’m quite a good player, but I’m not here enough to keep up with any teams. Besides, I know the outcome to all of the matches.”
Mickey rolled his eyes and turned back to the screen. “Right,” he muttered. “‘Course you are, and ‘course you do.”
“How’s work?” Rose asked, attempting to diffuse the bit of tension.
“S’alright,” he answered, pulling popcorn into his mouth. “Keith quit,” he announced without fanfare, but with a mouthful of snacks.
Rose didn’t seem put off by Mickey’s boorish behavior, although the Doctor was sure he’d have gotten the rough side of her tongue if he had done that. Not that he would ever do something so...apelike.
“He did?” She sounded surprised. “What happened?”
“Got hired in some posh garage.” He turned to Rose and puffed up, proudly. “Worked out better for me, though. I’m head mechanic now.”
“Oh, congratulations, Mick! That’s wonderful news!”
She elbowed the Doctor in the ribs and he grunted before giving the response he knew she wanted. “Yeah, s’fantastic, Mickey.” He tried to sound enthusiastic, for Rose’s sake.
Apparently it didn't work. “Ta,” Mickey said in a lackluster voice, then turned back to the match.
Jackie came into the lounge, smiling at the three on the couch, apparently chuffed to have all of her little family together. “Rose?”
“Yeah, Mum?”
“Come look at what I picked up for the girls.”
“Ooh, what’d you get?” Rose asked.
“It’s in your room. Come and see.”
The Doctor looked between the two women. Jackie was beaming at Rose, and it was hard to be anything other than pleased when Rose was smiling up at her mother like that, excitement and happiness shining in her eyes.
Rose slid forward to stand up and the Doctor put his hand to the small of her back, instinctively trying to help her.
As soon as the women left the room, chattering excitedly, Jack came in and flopped indelicately into the armchair perpendicular to the couch. “Who’s playing?” he asked, indicating the screen.
“Manchester United and West Ham,” the Doctor answered before Mickey could, just because, earning himself a look. Rose wasn’t around to chastise him, though, so he just smirked back at Mickey.
“Ah,” Jack said, sounding unconcerned and unimpressed. He sat his mug on the table in front of him and leaned back in the chair, crossing his hands behind his head and kicking his feet on the table beside his drink. Apparently, the Yank had gotten rather comfortable around Jackie’s flat while he and Rose were gone.
“Comfy, are we?” the Doctor deadpanned.
“Pretty comfy, yeah,” Jack retorted with a grin.
The Doctor nodded his head towards the mug on the table. “Didn’t take you long to wrangle a cuppa out of Jackie,” he observed in a dry voice.
“S’not tea,” Jack said, leaning up to take a sip. “She made some coffee for me when she knew we were coming. Knows I prefer it over tea.”
Scratch that. Jack had gotten very comfortable around Jackie’s flat while he and Rose had been gone.
“So who’s your team?” Mickey asked Jack.
“My soccer team?” Mickey scowled at the smart response, but the Doctor hid a pleased look. “Oh, I don’t know. West Ham makes me think of pork products, so Manchester, I suppose.”
Mickey looked at Jack with something like horror and the Doctor let out a laugh, not bothering to hide his amusement this time. Jack looked over to him and gave a conspiratorial grin.
The three watched the football match in silence for a bit, and the Doctor listened the sounds of Rose and her mother coming through the wall behind him, muffled but cheerful. After a bit, Rose came out and spoke.
“Doctor, I need you to talk to the babies. Mum hasn’t felt them move yet.”
“I still don’t believe they wiggle around when he speaks to them,” Jackie grumbled. “Sounds like wishful thinking to me.”
“Here, I’ll prove it. Put your hands here and here.” Rose placed Jackie’s hands where she wanted them. “Feel anything?”
Jackie held her hands there and looked as if she were concentrating hard, then shook her head. “Can’t feel them.”
“Alright, then. Doctor, come here and talk to the girls.” The Doctor got to his feet, eager to show off a bit, and went over to Rose. Perching on the arm of the chair where Jack sat, he bent down and put his lips close to her belly, right against the pink rosebud print on her shirt, murmuring sweet nonsense to his daughters.
Almost at once, Jackie’s eyes went wide and she looked from him to Rose. “I feel something.”
“There you go,” Rose replied with a smile. “Works every time.”
Jackie bent down towards Rose’s bump and the Doctor backed away. She kept her hands in their position and spoke to the babies, the same sort of nonsense the Doctor just had. She went on for a couple of minutes, then stood up, looking disappointed.
“Nothin’,” she said with a sad look.
“Aww, Mum, I’m sorry. They wiggle on their own sometimes, but they really get excited when their da talks to them. They don’t do it for me, really, not all the time, and Jack has tried, too.”
“I got nothing out of them,” Jack said, cheerful. “Seems they need to meet their Uncle Jack in person before they’re charmed by him!”
“Let me try,” Mickey said, and the Doctor swallowed the jealousy rising in him at the sight of Mickey with his hands on his wife and his lips hovering close to his baby girls. It was irrational, he knew. Rose was his, without question.
Still. Rickey the Idiot was touching his wife, and he didn’t like it.
“Nothin’,” the Idiot agreed after a minute, and the Doctor was more pleased than he should have been. Smidgen and Moppet only responded to him, and sometimes Rose. As it should be. Mummy and Daddy.
He took Rose’s hand and went back to the couch, settling her in beside him with his arm around her again. She lay her left hand on his thigh and he took it with his own left hand, absently playing with her fingers and then her ring. Jackie gave them a look he couldn’t quite describe and went back into the kitchen.
“So what’d your mum get?” he asked, thinking he probably should at least sound interested.
“A cot.” Rose smiled up at him. “She’s got a lovely white cot set up in my old room, with some really pretty bedding for it. Says she’s going to paint soon to match what she’s got. We won’t be able to park the TARDIS there anymore, though, when we fly here.”
“So that’s why she wouldn’t let me land in your room.” Rose nodded. “Doesn’t matter,” he went on, sounding unconcerned. “We’ll be driving most of the time. Safer that way. Won’t be a problem,” the Doctor assured her.
“She’s really excited about these babies. Everyone on the estate has heard all about them,” Mickey said without looking away from the screen. “She keeps showing me the scan pictures, but I can’t make heads or tails from it.”
“Literally,” Rose laughed. Mickey just gave her a smile and went back to his match.
“Jack?” Jackie called from the kitchen, “Will you come in here and fetch the basil for me? It’s on the top shelf.”
“Sure thing, Jacks.” He hopped up and started that way.
“And the washer’s making a clanking noise,” she told him as he entered the kitchen.
“Oi!” the Doctor cried indignantly and looked to Rose. “I’m the one always fixin’ the TARDIS.”
“Don’t take it personal, mate. I’m a bloody mechanic and she won’t let me work on anything, either. Says Jack’ll handle it. Says he’s like the son she never had, although I’ve caught her giving him the once-over a handful of times.”
Rose giggled, then leaned her head into his shoulder. “Mum fancying Jack. Should have seen that one coming.”
The Doctor just huffed. It was going to be a long day.
~*~O~*~
The Doctor had been surprised to find that Jackie was a good cook the first time he ate with her, and remained surprised every time she proved it by making something more than edible. She had made some sort of pork roast that he’d been skeptical of, but Mickey and Jack had both tucked into it immediately. Couldn’t beat the TARDIS’ fine meals, of course, but really, not bad at all.
She had made ‘candy potatoes’ for Rose, which were greeted with great excitement and enthusiasm. The Doctor curled his nose a bit. It didn’t escape him that nobody but Rose and Jack would touch them.
“Oh, Rose, I forgot to tell you,” Jackie said, spearing a bit of roast. “You’ll never guess who’s been visiting?”
“Who’s that?”
“Your Grampa Prentice,” she said easily, then put the roast into her mouth.
Rose’s eyes widened and her jaw dropped.
“Mum,” she began slowly, as if speaking to a child. “Grandpa Prentice died ten years ago.”
“Oh, I know.” Jackie sounded airy, unconcerned. The Doctor, however, felt a prickle of alarm. “It’s not actually him, you understand. It’s his ghost. Showed up last night, then again this morning. Bit scary that first time, but I knew it was him. Sensed his presence, y’know? Maybe he’ll come while you’re here!”
“There’s no such thing as ghosts, Jackie,” the Doctor said, succinct and sharp. “You must be seeing things.”
“Oi! Reckon I know what I’m talking about! S’not just happening to me. S’on the telly and everything. S’happening everywhere.”
The Doctor stood up, tossing down his napkin and abandoning his food. “Show me.”
“Finish eating and I will,” Jackie ordered, pointing downward to his seat.
“I need to see this,” he insisted.
“Sit,” Jackie said in a steely voice he recognized as very similar to his wife’s, with a finger jabbing towards his chair even more vehemently. “You’re not interrupting tea for this. If he comes back you can see him then. If not, you’ll have ruined everyone’s meal for nothing.”
The Doctor sat, grumbling about bossy mothers-in-law. But he exchanged an uneasy glance with Jack, then turned to Mickey. “You seen anything like this?”
“No, been busy at the shop,” Mickey answered, again not bothering to finish chewing his food before he spoke. “I’d have called.”
“M’done,” the Doctor announced, standing up again from the table suddenly, ignoring Jackie’s angry huff. “Need to watch the telly for a bit.”
Jack stood up beside him, just as quickly. “Me, too.”
~*~O~*~
Jackie had been right. Apparently the ‘ghosts’ were a widespread phenomenon, although none had appeared at the manor. He’d not seen any, had seen nothing about it, and UNIT hadn’t called him in on it. They seemed to have appeared all over the world at the same time of day yesterday, then again that morning. None of the ghosts ever interacted with people so far as he could tell, they simply stood around for a bit before they vanished.
It made him distinctly nervous.
“Jackie, what makes you think it’s your da?” he asked over his shoulder, eyes still glued to the telly.
She shrugged. “Just feels like him, you know? Feels the same way it used to feel when he was around. And I swear, I can smell him, too.”
He pinched the bridge of his nose, bracing himself, then turned and looked at her very seriously. “Jackie, I don’t think it’s your da. I think you were afraid and tried to justify what was happening to yourself in your own mind.”
Jackie threw up her hands in a gesture of sheer frustration. “Oh, why can’t you just believe it! Believe me?”
“Because it doesn’t make any sense, Jackie! And ghosts don’t exist! It’s barmy!”
Jackie stamped her foot. “They do, too!”
Rose stepped in and put her hand on her mum’s shoulder. “Mum, I used to think ghosts were real, too. On my second trip with the Doctor, we ran into something, and I thought it proved that I was right. But they weren’t ghosts, they were aliens called the Gelth.”
“These aren’t aliens!” Jackie insisted.
“Mum, I was sure they were ghosts. But they weren’t. They were Gelth, and they intended to take over the Earth.”
“What happened there?” Jack asked; he’d never heard this story before.
“They were coming through a tiny rift in time and space - the one in Cardiff, where we fuel up,” the Doctor explained to Jack, and he nodded.
“The one that the young girl closed? Gloria? Gwendolyn?”
“Gwyneth.”
“That’s it,” Jack agreed.
It was the Doctor’s turn to nod. “Gave her life to do it, too.” He felt a pang at the memory; Rose had been right, but he’d not trusted her and dismissed her input. It was a lesson he’d learned quickly and a mistake he vowed never to make again. He didn’t believe for a second that these apparitions were ghosts, but if Rose didn’t believe it either, that only stiffened his resolve. “The Gelth were animating dead bodies, creating zombies to conquer the planet. She stopped them.”
“So ghosts are barmy, but aliens that create zombies is perfectly logical?” Jackie’s voice was nothing but challenge.
The Doctor turned back to her, angry. “Aliens are real Jackie! Look at me! Your own son-in-law is a bloody alien, still you won’t believe!”
“I believe in you,” she answered hotly. “But some of the stories you tell…”
Rose came up behind him, placing her hand on his shoulder. He immediately and simultaneously relaxed at the warm weight on his hand and shielded himself telepathically, shoring up his mental defenses against sending her his anxiety and fear without meaning to. She sent him a wave of peace and he knew she was trying to calm him. It might have worked, if he hadn’t felt her own fear just behind it, shimmering, bright and mauve.
She put on a placating tone. “It doesn’t change it if you don’t believe it, Mum.”
Jackie’s eyes filled with angry tears and they spilled, splashing on her cheeks and leaving dark streaks in her makeup. “I’ve been so alone, Rose. You’ve been gone and I’ve been on my own. And that was okay, at least since you came back and started visiting regular. But still, I missed you. So much.
“And then your grandad was here and I didn’t feel so alone anymore. Why can’t I have this?” she turned to the Doctor and demanded. “Don’t you ever wish the people we’ve lost could visit us, comfort us?”
He shook his head, and surprised himself by going to Jackie and hugging her. “I wish I could say I did, but I actually think it’s barbaric. The dead don’t come back, Jackie. They stay dead.”
She sobbed against him for a few moments, and then Rose tapped her on the shoulder and she turned to her daughter, crying on Rose’s shoulder for a time. Rose whispered comforting nonsense while Jackie got hold of herself.
“What is it, then? What’s going on?” Jack asked.
“I don’t know. But something’s wrong.”
“Well let’s go check it out, yeah?” Mickey volunteered.
“No,” the Doctor said abruptly, turning to Mickey. He’d completely forgotten the other man was there, but was suddenly glad he was. Even if he was an idiot. “I have something much more important for you to do. I need you to stay here and take care of Rose.”
“Oi!” Rose stepped away from her mother, almost seeming to forget Jackie. “You’re not leaving me here like some bloody damsel in distress! I’m going with you!”
“How about some tea, Jackie?” Jack spoke up. “I know I could use some, and these two need to talk.”
Jackie nodded, sniffling, and Mickey said, “yeah, alright,” looking back at the Doctor. The Doctor gave Jack a grateful look, then Jack turned away to follow Mickey and Jackie into the kitchen.
The Doctor stood up and took Rose’s hand, bracing himself for her anger just as he had with Jackie. “Rose, you know I can’t let you come with us.”
“Us?”
“I’m taking Jack with me to check it out.”
Rose scowled, but just then Jackie’s voice came in from the kitchen. “Rose! He’s here! Grampa Prentice is here! Come say hello!”
The Doctor pulled Rose behind him and went to the kitchen. He felt Rose beside him once he stopped, just inside the doorway.
There was a pale, shimmering, humanoid shape standing in Jackie’s kitchen. Jackie was crying again, but these seemed to be happy tears. She looked from the ‘ghost’ over to Rose and the Doctor. “Doesn’t it seem right, Rose? Can’t you just feel him?”
Rose slipped her hand into the Doctor’s and he squeezed it, hard.
“Who are you? What do you want?” he demanded of ‘Grampa Prentice’.
“Oi! Don’t talk to my da that way!”
The Doctor and Jack made brief eye contact, then the Doctor turned back to Jackie. “Jackie, that’s not your da. Something’s wrong here, something’s very, very wrong. Bucketfuls of wrong.”
“What is it, Doctor?” Rose asked without looking at him.
Just then, the apparition faded away.
“Blimey,” Mickey muttered.
“Well, I’d say he scarpered because you were so rude to him, but he’s never stayed for long before, either,” Jackie grumbled.
The Doctor turned to Rose, then pulled her back into the lounge, away from the others. “I’m afraid, Rose,” he said and looked into her eyes. “This shouldn’t be happening. Need to get to the bottom of it, but I don’t know what I’m dealing with. Could be dangerous. Really dangerous.”
“We’ve faced dangerous stuff before, yeah?”
“Rose, please.” In desperation, he sent her just a taste of his fear. She furrowed her brow and sent back a stubborn reluctance, which didn’t quite hide the same mauve fear he’d felt before.
“What are we going to do?” she asked.
“Jack and I are going to the TARDIS to go check it out. You stay here for the time being.”
She stamped her foot in defiance. “You can’t leave me here, Doctor! I want to come with you. I swear I won’t leave the TARDIS. Alright? Just let me come with you!”
He never told her no. Never. He had come to believe that he wasn't capable of denying her anything she wanted.
But this time, he had to. “No, Rose. Not yet. I may come back for you before this is over, but right now I need you to stay here with your mum and Mickey. Don’t leave the flat for any reason unless I tell you to. Jack can speak in my stead; if he tells you to do something, you do it.”
Rose’s eyes shimmered with tears, and his hearts clenched painfully. He was sending her away from him, and it was agony. “Doctor, I’m afraid. I want to be with you. It’s the only place that’s safe.”
The instinct to protect her that had been more powerful since it had been triggered by her hormones she became pregnant was intensifying by the moment. The need to keep her and the babies out of harm's way was overwhelming his thoughts. “You're safe here for the mo'. The TARDIS is safe. Beside me while I investigate what's going on is not. I won’t let anything happen to you, Rose. Ever.”
Rose nodded, and sent him a rush of love and worry.
“No matter what happens, Rose, I will come back for you, even if I make you stay here until everything’s settled. I swear to you, I will. I will always come back for you, I’ll never leave you. Do you believe me?” He smiled down at her, trying to mask the extent of his fear. “Just stay here for me, okay?”
She nodded again, and wiped her eyes. “I’m not happy about this, you know. I’m furious with you.”
“I know. It’s worth it if it keeps you safe.”
She slipped her arms around his waist, under his jacket. “I love you,” she said, just above a whisper.
“I love you, too,” he said, putting his forehead to hers for a second then kissing the tip of her nose. “Just trust me this time, alright?”
Rose nodded, and he looked up to find Jackie, Jack, and Mickey in the doorway of the kitchen, watching them.
He stood upright and looked at Jackie and Mickey. “You two stay here. Don’t leave. Keep Rose safe.”
“Sure thing, boss,” Mickey said with a mock salute right as Jackie said, “We will.”
He kissed Rose’s forehead once more, then separated himself from her. “Right. Jack, let’s go.”
~*~O~*~
[Doctor] 22/08/07 - 4:34pm: are you still at the flat?
[Rose] 22/08/07 - 4:35pm: here with mum and mickey. you alright?
[Doctor] 22/08/07 - 4:35pm: think we’ve zeroed in on the source of the ghosts
[Rose] 22/08/07 - 4:35pm: ...and?
[Doctor] 22/08/07 - 4:37pm: clear a spot in the lounge for me to park. I’ll be there in five minutes.
[Doctor] 22/08/07 - 4:37pm: need to get you in the TARDIS, safe
[Rose] 22/08/07 - 4:37pm: are YOU safe?
[Doctor] 22/08/07 - 4:42pm: Taking off now. be there in less than a minute
~*~O~*~
Rose didn’t bother to wait for the Doctor to step out of the TARDIS when he landed, she just opened the door and rushed right in.
“Doctor, what’s going on?”
“There’s another government agency I didn’t know about. It’s called ‘Torchwood’,” he explained, not looking up from the console where he was darting around, pressing buttons and flipping switches. Jack stood over by the cabinets, winding a long cable around his arm. “The signal is originating from there, but I don’t know why. It’s creating these ‘ghosts’, only that’s not what they are. And the signal is getting stronger.”
Rose felt a stab of dread, more intense than the fear she’d been struggling with for the last couple of hours. The Doctor almost always knew what was going on, and she had rarely seen him so unsettled. He never got like this unless the situation was near-desperate. She’d seen him like this three times over the year-and-a-half since she’d taken off with him. Once in Van Staten’s bunker, again in 1987, and then again at the -
She stiffened. At the Gamestation. Just before he’d sent her away.
“Don’t send me away, Doctor,” she said in a flat, firm voice.
He stopped what he was doing then and nodded to Jack, indicating for the Captain to come along. Then he came to her, putting his hands on her upper arms and kissing her forehead before wrapping her up in his arms. “M’not going to send you away, Rose. Not really. But I am going to make you stay in the TARDIS. And I’m sending you to the zero room: it’s the safest possible place to put you.”
“What’s the zero room?”
“It’s a room that completely tamps out psychic and telepathic abilities. Life signs can’t escape it, and no one can get in without my or the TARDIS’ help - even if they could find it. The TARDIS hides it, and I rarely use it. No one will be able to detect you’re on board, at all.”
“What about Mum and Mickey?”
“They can go with you, keep them safe as well. We’ll get them, quick. But I don’t have time to explain anything.”
Rose walked to the door, trying to keep up with the Doctor who was hurrying along beside her, opening the door and calling for Jackie and Mickey to come on board.
The cloister bell rang and the door closed in front of her, giving her just a glimpse of Jackie and Mickey’s wide, frightened eyes. The Doctor let fly a string of curses she rarely heard.
”Fuck! Goddammit! Fuck!” He ran up the ramp to the console and she spun to look at him, dancing around, flipping switches, clearly panicked. “We’re being transmatted! Shit! Jack, get Rose to the zero room! Now! First room on the right!”
“Doctor?” Rose could hear the fear in her own voice and didn’t need to touch him to feel his. She ran to him at the console, trying to stay far enough back to let him do what he needed, just craving his closeness. Jack approached her, put his hands on her shoulders to guide her away, but she shook him off.
The TARDIS landed with a thump and Rose looked at the monitor. She sucked in a sharp breath when she saw what waited for them.
Soldiers with guns came running towards them, crouching and taking aim at the TARDIS. “Doctor!” she cried, a definite note of panic in her voice.
The Doctor didn’t see her and didn’t seem to have heard her; he was on the other side of the console working and swearing profusely in English and Gallifreyan.
“Doctor!” she shouted again, shaking Jack off.
He didn’t answer her right away. “Jack, take Rose to the zero room and come back here, right away! When you get her there, press code 5442 into the keypad by the wall.” He turned to Rose and took her by the shoulders again. “Rose, I have to go deal with this.” He kissed her forehead quickly and went back to the console.
“You can’t!” She broke away from Jack and ran to the doorway, blocking it with her body. “They have guns, Doctor.”
“And I don’t, so I have the moral high ground.” He gave her a bright, false smile and bent to give her another quick kiss.
“What’s 5442 do?”
“It’ll let messages or calls from me, Jack and Mickey get in and calls from your phone get out. The superphones.”
“Doctor,” she said again, her tears spilling over. “They have guns.”
“That’s why I need you to get to the zero room. Now.” She cried harder, and he pulled her into his arms. “S’alright, Rose. I’ll come back to you. I’ll always come back to you. Do you believe me?”
She nodded against his chest, sniffling.
“No matter what I look like, I’ll always be with you. I’ll still be me.”
“What you look like?” Confusion fought with fear.
“No time to explain. Go with Jack. I’ll be back before you know it.”
She raised up to look at him, wiping her eyes. He kissed her again, softly, then gave her a little, almost playful push. “Go. I love you. I’ll be back soon.”
Rose stood on tiptoe to press another, urgent kiss to his lips while the Doctor spread his hands over her belly for just a moment. Then she turned and followed Jack, looking over her shoulder to the Doctor.
He’d moved away from the console and stood at the doors, squaring his shoulders. He looked over to her and gave her a small smile, but didn’t open the door until she was out of sight. She heard the doors close behind him and burst into tears at the sound.
“S’alright, Rose. He’ll be alright.”
Jack opened the door to the first room on the right and she followed him in. The room was blindingly white and bare. She turned around to look at Jack, who was pressing keys on the panel on the wall.
“Jack, please. Help me get out there to him.”
“Absolutely not, Rosie. This is dangerous, and the Doctor is afraid. I’ve never seen him like this.”
“I can help him.”
“No, Rosie.” Jack whirled around to face her. “He needs to fix this, and he’s got to believe you’re safe in order to do it. It’s dangerous for you to be out there; not only because of whatever threat we're facing, but because the Doctor needs to concentrate in order to fix it. He isn’t worth a shit when he thinks you’re in danger - you know that - and he tends to be rash. If he knows you’re alright in here, he’ll be able to think more clearly. And I will, too. I need to get out there and help him.” Rose opened her mouth to protest, and Jack held up a hand to cut her off. “Please, Rosie. Call Jackie and Mickey and tell them to stay home. They should be safe there. The TARDIS is making you comfortable, look.”
Rose looked around and saw that the TARDIS had, indeed, made the stark white room more comfortable with a couch, a telly and some books.
She spun on her heel to look at her friend again. “Jack, please. Bring him back to me. I need him. I need you, too.”
“Both of us will be back, Rose. Both of us. I just need you to believe me.”
Rose nodded, trying to control her crying. “Go. You need to go.”
He hugged her tight. “Stay safe, Rosie. Love you.”
“Love you, too.”
Jack walked out into the corridor and closed the door behind him without looking at Rose. When the door sealed itself into a solid wall behind him, Rose collapsed against it, her face creased, one hand pressed to her forehead and another pressed to her mouth as if in a vain attempt to quiet the desolate sobbing.
Notes:
I split this chapter into two parts, because it got to be incredibly long. The other half will go up sometime today, I promise.
Chapter 21: Lightning Strikes
Summary:
And if I could turn back the hands of time
Still I wouldn't know what I'm supposed to change
It's like a well gone dry, like a kiss goodbye
As the grip gets tighter, I continue to fight it
Then you strike me with your lightning
~TR
Notes:
Several people expressed concern after the last chapter, so let me take a moment and address it for everyone:
We are not going to Pete's World. Rose and the babies are fine. Doomsday is not happening as it did in canon. Things are wildly different here.Also, I love you.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Rose had spent most of the last hour pacing the room, unable to sit still. She’d rung her mum and Mickey, just as the Doctor and Jack had instructed, and tried to soothe them. It was a nearly impossible task with her own anxiety so intense, and she was sure her fear had come through in her voice. She really couldn’t think of anything but what was happening to the Doctor and Jack. What could be so terrible that they needed to lock her away? She knew the babies had to be protected, but the agony of being separated from them, of not knowing... Rose felt her heart rate increase and tears prick her eyes every time she considered it.
Concentrating on a conversation with her frightened mother and best mate wasn’t on the top of her list of priorities at the moment.
So instead of answering a bunch of questions she’d told them she’d call them later and rang off. They’d proceeded to blow up her phone with texts, but she only answered a couple of them. She told them she had to keep the line free for the Doctor, and they’d mostly stopped after that.
It wasn’t only fear that gripped her. What had the Doctor meant by ‘No matter what I look like, I’ll always be with you’? That made absolutely no sense to her. Why wouldn’t he look like himself when he came back? He must be afraid of being disfigured or something. It was the only explanation. But it wouldn’t matter; she’d love him no matter what he looked like.
She called Martha, knowing she probably shouldn’t, deciding that asking for forgiveness was easier than permission. She needed her friend. Martha told her that UNIT was aware of the situation, that the Doctor had been in touch. She claimed to not know what was happening, and deflected Rose’s further questions with concern for her and the babies' health. She'd given Rose several admonitions to lie down and try very, very hard not to panic. Panic wasn’t good for the babies, she said.
That just worried Rose more: she’d left sheer, blind panic in the rear view quite a ways back. But she had agreed to try what Martha suggested for the sake of her babies and laid down on the couch, taking deep breaths and thinking of the night the Doctor had taken her to Woman Wept. It had been the first time she’d suspected he may love her, too, and the memory was warm. She let herself relive every moment; every touch, every whispered word, the way his thumb had caressed the inside of her wrist.
There was a noise from behind Rose at the place the door had been, and Rose sat up like a shot. “Doctor?”
It wasn’t the Doctor.
A man stood there with his back to her, pushing the door closed and pressing numbers into the keypad. He seemed vaguely familiar, but she couldn’t place him.
“Who are you? What do you want? Where is the Doctor?” she demanded, clamoring to her feet and sweeping her eyes quickly around the room, looking for a weapon.
The man punched one last number into the keypad and lowered his hands. “Rose…” he began.
Rose cut him off. “How do you know my name? Who are you? Answer me!”
The man didn’t turn around, just hung his head and took a deep breath. “You’ve never met me. Well, you have, but...not...it’s complicated. The Doctor said that this was going to be quite a shock to you, and told me to tell you that it was alright and he’d explain everything when he got back.”
“Explain what? Who are you?!”
Her father turned around.
“My name is Pete Tyler, and I’ve been told that you’re my daughter.”
~*~O~*~
Rose sat down, hard, on the couch behind her. Her heart pounded wildly in her chest, feeling like it was trying to break through her ribs.
“You can’t be,” she breathed. “I saw you die.”
“You saw a version of me die. This universe’s version of me.”
“This universe? What do you mean ‘this universe’?” she demanded, covering her belly protectively, instinctively, without even realizing she was doing it. “Answer me!”
“Blimey, the Doctor was right,” he muttered. Then, louder: “He told me you sounded just like your mother when you were cross.”
“Answer me, dammit!”
“There are parallel universes. In the one I came from, I was married to Jackie Tyler but we never had a child. The Doctor tells me that this version of me was married to Jacks and we had a daughter - you. Then I - he - was in a car accident and died?”
Rose nodded, mute.
“That didn’t happen where I’m from. I started a company, Vitex, and am now a multimillionaire. Just shy of a billionaire, actually.” He lowered his head sadly. “Well, I was.”
“You saw the Doctor? How did you get here? Why are you here?”
“Torchwood in your universe has been opening a wormhole to the void, the gap between universes. I am the director of Torchwood in my universe, and I came through that wormhole with my assistant, Jake, to warn this version of Torchwood of what was coming. There have been enemies waiting on the chance to come through and take over.”
“Enemies? What enemies?”
“Daleks and cybermen. My wife - I suppose she would be your mother, I don’t know - she was killed in a cyberman attack three years ago.”
Rose had no idea what cybermen were, but her eyes widened at the other word.
“Daleks,” she muttered.
“We haven’t had dealings with them before in my world, only the cybermen. We knew about them, though, of course.”
“Why can’t you go back?” she asked in a dull voice. Nothing made sense, everything was a jumble, but her brain was reeling and trying to understand.
“We knew about the cybermen trying to get through and stopped them. Coming here was dangerous, we knew it, but we had to warn you all or your planet would have been rendered extinct. This Torchwood had no idea what was coming or how to stop it. They had no idea a parallel universe even existed.”
“Why are you still here? Why did the Doctor send you to me?”
“I can’t get back to my universe. Our dimension hoppers were only good for one jump. We were counting on this Torchwood having perfected the technology, also. They haven’t. We’re stuck.”
Rose considered this, trying to put the pieces together, then asked. “So let me get this straight. You’re my dad, but you’re not my dad. You’re a billionaire from another universe, and you’re stuck here now.”
“It’s a lot to take in,” he said, not unsympathetically.
“How is the Doctor going to get rid of the Daleks and cybermen?”
“I explained about the Void, and he had the idea to open up the door on this side. They all have a certain...particle all around them. Void stuff, he called it. They’ll all be sucked in. But because I’ve been through the Void, I would have been, too. So he sent me in here to keep me safe. Said you’d divorce him and never speak to him again if he let me die. Again.”
“So he’s okay? He’s safe? You saw him? He won’t get pulled through? What about Jack?” She fired off questions, trying to clear her cluttered mind and get the answers she needed.
“Jack,” Pete said, sounding as if he were pondering. “I believe that’s the bloke the Doctor mentioned. I think he was hurt.”
Rose burst into the tears she’d been trying to keep in. “No, not Jack,” she cried. Pete hovered by the door, making hesitant movements, then came over to the couch to sit by her. Rose buried her face in her hands to cry. She felt no threat from this man, from her father’s doppelganger, but it was all so much to take in. Too much.
Pete patted her on the shoulder awkwardly. “S’alright, Rose. I know we don’t know each other, but I’m sure if Jackie raised you, you’re a fine young woman.”
“This is going to kill Mum. She’s going to fall over dead when she sees you alive.”
“So she’s safe, then?”
“She’s never been to a parallel world, if that’s what you’re getting at. She’s alive. I just spoke with her a few minutes ago.”
Pete nodded. “Maybe I shouldn’t meet her. We could just...not tell her. It’d probably be too painful for me to see her, anyway.”
Rose opened her mouth to curse him out; how dare he worry about what was painful for him? Her mum had survived his death, surely her mother should be the primary concern? It didn’t even occur to her that he’d survived the same thing; the death of his Jackie.
Before Rose could say anything, before she could shout at him angrily, the door flew open and Jack stood there.
“Rose, come quick.”
She scrambled to her feet and went, as fast as she could, to the door. “What is it?”
“It’s the Doctor. He’s hurt.”
~*~O~*~
The Doctor lay on the ground, praying to anyone who may be out there that Rose would get to him in time. The pain was unbearable and he wanted to scream, but he couldn’t. All of his concentration and focus were going into holding off the regeneration until Rose could get there. He couldn’t terrify Rose any more than she probably already was now, and certainly would be when she saw him regenerate, but he had to speak with her first. He had to do what he could to make her understand.
Why hadn’t he ever told her about what could happen? Why hadn’t he ever told her about regeneration? Now she was going to watch him ignite and burn, and emerge on the other side a completely new man. He cursed himself bitterly for withholding this fact about his biology from her, and dreaded what was to come - not for his sake, but for hers. There was no other choice. He couldn’t ignore or avoid this any longer, he couldn't leave it to Jack to explain; he had to warn her as best he could.
He clenched his teeth and did his best to concentrate, even as the cells in his brain began to break down, leaving him confused.
Tears fell from his eyes, but he didn’t know if they were from the pain of the shot from the Dalek that had grazed him, or the pain of what was about to befall his Rose. It was his fault; he should have told her long ago. He’d mentioned it, earlier that day, but he didn’t explain himself fully.
He knew, somehow, that it would be a decision he’d regret forever.
“Doctor!”
Her blessed voice was strangled and so afraid it made him cringe, his hearts clenching even more painfully in his chest.
He was about to hurt her deeply. He should have told her.
“Doctor!” He felt her drop to her knees beside him and it occurred to him to give her a lecture about being so roughshod with her body while she was pregnant, but the words wouldn’t come. There were more important things to say right now.
“Doctor, you’ll be alright,” she said in what she obviously considered to be a soothing manner, but only managing to sound terrified. “We’ll fix this, yeah? You’ll be okay.”
His hands were already glowing, his time was very short. Thoughts crowded in on each other and the Doctor felt his thoughts slipping out of his control. He struggled to power through it, to wrestle his brain into submission, to speak. Every word was a battle, fought and won.
“Rose, listen. I told you I’d never leave you, yeah? But I’m going to change. Every cell in my body is dying, but it’s okay.”
Tears splashed on his chest. “Don’t say that. You’ll be alright, yeah? Jack!” she yelled. “We have to get him to the medbay.”
He felt the fires of regeneration stoking themselves within his very bones and did his best to hold them off, redoubling his efforts. His control was slipping, but he had to hold on just long enough to get her to safety. “It’ll be okay, Rose. It’ll be me. I love you. It’ll be me. Believe me. Jack, get her back.”
“No. No!” she screamed when Jack pulled her back. She fought him, shaking her shoulders away from him and diving back toward the Doctor. Jack slipped his hands under her armpits and lifted her, pulling her backwards.
“What’s happening? What the hell is happening?? Jack? Doctor! Let me go! Let me go, Jack! He needs me! Doctor!!”
The Doctor clambered to his feet, swaying, more than a little unsteady, but managed to smile at her. “It’s still me, Rose. Remember that. I love you. It’s still me. I’ll never leave you.”
Then his head flopped back and his arms and legs extended, straight and stiff. He surrendered the battle against the inevitable, letting the bright gold flames of regeneration take him.
Notes:
Goodbye, Nine. J'adore.
Chapter 22: On the TARDIS
Summary:
The question comes to mind
About what should be done
And how much of the old will die
That the new may be begun
But you don’t have to be afraid
-The Ikon
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Every cell in the Doctor’s body was on fire, and he would have writhed and screamed out in pain if he had been able. This wasn’t his first regeneration: it was, in fact, his tenth. They never seemed to get any easier.
Rose… Please, I need to take care of Rose...my babies…my little girls, he pleaded with nothing. Please....please let Rose love me.
The flames licking at him receded, and he took a stumbling step forward, off the tiptoes he’d been standing on.
Very, very quickly, he looked down and took a mental inventory of his new body, bringing his hands in to touch his chest. It wouldn’t do to be something terrifying.
Humanoid. Thank heavens.
Long fingers on those hands. Five on each.
He lay his hand flat over the place his hearts should be. Two heartbeats. Good.
Skinny. Blimey, he was skinny. He’d never been quite this lean. His coat was hanging loosely on him.
Tall. He was tall; just slightly taller than his last body.
He directed his thoughts southward, just below his belt. Still a man, then, he noticed.
New teeth - oh, that felt weird. He wondered what Rose would think of his smile.
Rose. Oh, bloody hell, Rose. He’d mucked things up spectacularly this time, hadn’t he? She may never speak to him again.
And it hit him, then, that he loved her as much now as he had five minutes ago before he regenerated, if not more. Thank Rassilon, God, and banana nut muffins.
Rose.
He looked up to her from his lightning fast self-inventory, waiting for her reaction.
Jack was staring at him and had his arms around her, holding her protectively. Her arms were thrown around Jack’s neck and her face was buried in his shoulder. She was sobbing and saying something he couldn’t quite make out. His hearts broke at the sight and sound of her; he’d never seen her nearly so upset.
The Doctor had a brief, mental fight with himself about how it was okay for Jack to be holding his Rose that way, and he shouldn’t be upset by the sight of his wife in another man’s arms. This was Jack; they were like siblings. Besides, he was the one who had asked Jack to get her away, and she was in dire need of comfort right now. He understood that. At least, he tried to.
Pete and Jake gaped at him, but he only had eyes for his Rose. She cried brokenly in Jack’s arms, each of her sobs like a stab to his new hearts with a sharpened blade.
“Rose, I’m here,” the Doctor tried to reassure her, taking a step forward.
She raised her head to look up at him hopefully, then burst into renewed tears when she saw him. His hearts seized and he took a couple more steps towards her, but when she shook her head against Jack’s chest he lurched to a stop. Jack kept his eyes on the Doctor as he lay his cheek down on Rose’s hair, whispering something that the Doctor couldn’t hear over the din of fear filling his mind and roaring in his ears.
“Rose…” He began again, and she shook her head even more vehemently. Jack gave the Doctor a subtle nod and raised his hand from Rose’s back in a gesture clearly meant to communicate ‘hold on’.
The Doctor didn’t fear Jack’s motives, and spared a surprised thought at the level of trust he was willing to put in the handsome American.
Still, he agonized to himself while Jack continued whispering to Rose, rubbing her back. She hadn’t looked at him, seemed to be ignoring him entirely in favor of the comfort Jack was providing.
“He’s gone, Jack! He’s gone!”
“Sweetie, it’s okay.”
“It’s not okay!” she insisted, sobbing. “The Doctor just...he just...he exploded!”
“The Doctor is just over there, Rosie,” Jack said bracingly. “Rather fit, too. Look.”
His lighthearted tease, an attempt to lighten the mood, fell flat. Rose just sobbed harder into her hands. “No, Jack! He’s gone! I saw it!”
“Rose,” the Doctor said in a low, pleading voice. “Look at me, please.”
The only indication that she’d heard him was another shake of the head into her hands against Jack’s chest. The Doctor waited anxiously for Rose to collect herself, shuffling from one foot to another. He was desperate to explain to her what had just happened. She would be furious, he knew, especially given her reaction thus far, but he had to make her understand. He needed her to give him a chance.
Rose snuffled one last time and pulled her head away from Jack’s chest, still looking down where her face had been. The Doctor realized the exact moment that she saw Jack’s blood-soaked shirt with a single hole in it, the evidence of his injury and death. She went very still.
The Doctor cringed. He’d never told Rose about what she did for Jack when she was Bad Wolf. He and Jack had talked about it for endless hours while Rose wasn’t around, and he knew that Jack had, for the most part, accepted his fate. Jack understood that it was an accident and didn’t hold it against Rose. But neither of them had ever told her. They’d kept that from her, hoping to spare her from the knowledge of the kind of life she had condemned Jack to. She had no idea he was immortal.
Jack had been complicit in keeping the secret, but ultimately it had been the Doctor’s decision to keep her in the dark.
The Doctor cursed himself. He’d worked so hard to build her trust in him; they’d been through so much together. It had taken a great deal of effort on his part to prove to her that she was so much more than a shopgirl from the estates. Now he’d gone and broken her trust in a colossal way. This was, quite possibly, the most significant fuck-up of his life. He was in more trouble than he’d originally thought.
Rose went from sounding shocked to panicked in a flash. “Jack. You’re hurt!”
“Shhh, Rosie. It’s okay. I’m fine.”
Now she sounded nearly hysterical, and the Doctor itched to go to her. He fisted and released his hands, trying to control the impulse to take her into his arms - where she belonged - and comfort her.
“You’re not fine. Look at you! What the hell happened to you? Why are you covered in blood?” She put her hands to his chest and abdomen, touching him lightly in various places as if checking for an injury, looking for something she could heal. The Doctor flinched when he saw her pull back her hands with blood on them.
Jack cringed, too, before he took Rose by the shoulders and ducked his head to catch her eye. Despite knowing it was Jack’s blood, the Doctor was even more terrified and dismayed to see the red stains of Jack’s blood imprinted on her belly, transferred from Jack’s soaked shirt. He shuddered, willing the thought of her being injured away from him. She’s okay. She’s not been hurt. She was in the zero room, nothing harmed her, he told himself sternly. Nothing ever upset him more than her being in danger or hurt, but he didn’t have time to dwell on that now.
She still hadn’t looked at the Doctor since her first, almost dismissive glance, and he pleaded with her mentally to do so.
“I’m alright, Rose,” Jack assured her again in a quiet voice, but loud enough now for the Doctor to hear. “I was shot, but I’m okay. It’s a long story, and we’ll tell you all about it, but there’s more important things to talk about now, okay?”
Rose shook her head in denial, and the Doctor spoke again. “Rose?”
She froze, looking up at Jack with wide eyes. He nodded to her. “It’s okay, Rose. It’s him. He’s okay.”
Time crawled, and the turn of Rose’s head towards him seemed to take hours. The Doctor smiled at her with his bright, new teeth, hoping against hope she would take this well.
She looked horrified.
“Who are you?” she asked.
“I’m the Doctor. It’s me, Rose.”
She shook her head stubbornly and took a step backwards, towards Jack, nudging into him. “You’re not the Doctor. You’re not.”
“But, Rose, I am. Don’t you remember? I told you I’d never leave you, and even if I looked different, it would still be me. It’s still me, Rose.”
She shook her head again, and Jack put his hands on her shoulders. “Rose, it’s him. Really. He regenerated.”
“Time Lords do regenerate, then,” Pete marveled, looking at the Doctor, then over at Jake. “We’d always heard…” Jake nodded beside him, but they both froze when the Doctor glowered at them.
He turned back to Rose and took a step towards her. She immediately retreated, pushing against Jack and forcing him backwards as well. The Doctor felt his shoulders droop for a moment, then he straightened them again. He could make her understand. He could. He had to.
“Every cell in my body died, Rose, and was recreated. It’s a little trick Time Lords have, a way to cheat death. I’m here, and I’m perfectly healthy.” He paused for a moment and looked pensive. “Although there’s a slight weakness in the dorsal tubercle. And a mole! I’ve got a mole, right between my -”
“Doctor,” Jack said in a low, warning tone, then squeezed his hands on Rose’s shoulders, both in a comforting gesture and to remind the Doctor where his focus should be. Rose never took hers eyes from the Doctor, she just continued to stare with shocked, wide eyes.
“Right, right,” the Doctor agreed, looking away for a moment and putting his hands in his pockets. His coat shifted unnaturally against him, reminding him again of how much thinner he was this time. He’d have to change clothes soon.
“You’re not my Doctor,” Rose murmured, and the Doctor looked back at her. She was regarding him carefully, looking him up and down, and he saw her chin wobble. Her voice was stronger, more insistent when she said, “My Doctor - my husband - he just...he caught fire and...now he’s...he’s...” She burst into tears again and spun into Jack’s chest. Jack put his arms around her once more and gave the Doctor a sympathetic look.
“He’s dead, Jack. He’s gone and left me,” she wailed against his chest.
Jack sighed and rested his chin on the top of her head. “He’s not dead, Rose. He’s right here. That’s the Doctor.” Rose shook her head against him, denying his words even as he said them. “Look,” Jack bent his head down to talk to her, pulling her back from him a little so she could look at him. She didn’t remove her hands from her face until he tugged them away. “Just talk to him, okay? I promise, everything is okay.”
“Gentlemen, I believe I owe my wife an explanation. Can you give us the room?”
Rose spun around to look at him, her eyes red-rimmed and angry. “M’not your wife,” she spat. “And Jack stays.”
The Doctor and Jack both spoke to her at the same time.
“Rose…”
“Rosie…”
“I said, Jack stays,” she insisted, then turned to Jack again. “I need you, Jack. M’not letting you leave me alone with this...with this…with him.”
The Doctor felt a sudden, bright flash of jealousy and tamped it down. Jack made her feel safe, and she needed that right now. She didn’t feel safe with him. The thought made his guts twist painfully.
At least, he hoped that writhing sensation was because of guilt and hurt, not the alternative. He didn’t have time.
He nodded, morose, then spoke to Pete and Jake. “Pete, Jake. If you’ll excuse us. We’ll meet you in my library in a bit.”
“Where’s the library?” Jake asked.
“The TARDIS will lead you there.”
“Sentient?”
The Doctor merely nodded and hummed affirmatively.
Pete took a step towards Rose, and she cringed into Jack, who put his hands on her shoulders again.
“Rose, will you be alright?” Pete asked, his voice soft.
Of course she’ll be alright, you bloody wanker, the Doctor thought bitterly. As if I’d ever hurt my wife. The very idea...
“She’ll be fine,” Jack answered on Rose’s behalf. “Promise. Neither of us would ever hurt her.” He was speaking to Rose as much as Pete, and the Doctor appreciated it.
Pete looked at Jack hard, then nodded. “Come on, Jake,” Pete said, clapping the younger man on the shoulder. “Let’s see if this Doctor has any good scotch. I could use a drink.”
The Doctor waited until the other men’s footfalls couldn’t be heard in the corridor, then took a tentative step towards Rose.
She drew back from him, and he stopped.
“Doctor,” Jack reasoned. “I think maybe you should explain to her about what happened.”
“Doesn’t matter what happened,” Rose said in a crisp, cold tone, then choked over her next words. “M’Doctor died. Doesn’t matter how.”
“I’m not dead, Rose,” the Doctor said, trying to keep his voice even, but struggling. The twisting in his guts was back as well, and that didn’t bode well. He suspected he may not have much time to explain, and it was really really bad timing. He could feel frustration creeping up and pressing in on him from all angles, but he fought it back. Even though his anger was entirely self-directed, he needed to be as calm as possible in the next few minutes.
“Who are you, then?” Rose said, a challenge. “Because my Doctor...he was here…”
“I was shot, Rose. There were daleks and cybermen everywhere, and I decided to suck them into the void. Jack was holding on to Jake, keeping him from being drawn in as well. I had my hands on the lever that controlled the opening of the wormhole, and thought I was safe. Some of the daleks, though, they decided not to go down without a fight. They came through shooting as they fell, and one of their shots grazed my shoulder.
“A shot from a dalek is fatal for a Time Lord, Rose. It was going to kill me. I was lucky: if it had been a direct hit, I’d have died and really would have been gone from you, forever. But since it was just a glancing blow, I knew I’d be able to recover. By regenerating.
“The wormhole closed itself when it sucked the last of the daleks and cybermen through. Jack saw I was hurt, and he and Jake carried me back here. I had to see you. I had to try to explain…”
“Explain what?”
“What was about to happen. My body can heal itself, but it makes me into an entirely new man. Same thoughts, same memories, same everything. Just a new body. Well,” he tugged his ear, looking off into the distance and he knew at once that this ear-tugging would be a habit in this new body. “I’ll have a few new personality traits. Not really sure what just yet. Will I be funny? Sarcastic? Temperamental? Perhaps I’ll be -” He cleared his throat, realizing (with the help of a pointed look from Jack) that perhaps now wasn’t the best time to go into all of that.
“My point is, Rose...I’m still me. I changed, but it’s still me. I’m still here.”
“Can you change back?” she asked, sounding hopeful.
“Do you want me to?”
“Yes,” she said flatly, and he’d never felt so defeated in his life.
“No. I can’t. This is my new body.” He wondered for the first time how he looked, wondered if he still looked as daft as he did before. Was he ugly now? No time to think about that. He’d find out soon enough. “But I remember everything, Rose,” he said, taking a step and moving just a bit closer to her. This time, she didn’t draw back into Jack, and he was encouraged.
“I took you to Horm to the lunar festival there, d’you remember? And I bought you that pink blanket you love so much. And remember the time we had to hop for our lives?” He hopped on one foot a little, hoping to remind her, but she only looked at him as if he were mad.
Perhaps I am, he thought.
His brain scrambled for other examples. This was no time to be drawing a blank.
Rose peered at him, putting her hands over her belly. He sighed and tried another tactic.
“Your name is Rose Marion Tyler, but you hate your middle name. Your favorite color isn’t pink, it’s actually yellow. I always thought you were only saying that, since I called you my ‘pink and yellow girl,’ but you do seem to gravitate towards yellow clothes and flowers and -” Jack cleared his throat again and the Doctor paused. Blimey, this body seemed to have a gob. “Your mum’s name is Jackie. She lives in Flat 48, Bucknall House, on the Powell Estate in London, although I expect she’ll be spending quite a bit of time with us. You and I have a house together, a manor, really, in Kent. We set up a room for her, and you decorated it - quite tastefully - in pink and green. I just bought you a blue Range Rover so you could get back and forth to your mum, and-”
He stopped suddenly, his hands flying to his belly where a sharp, searing pain ripped across from side to side. Opening his mouth, a small cloud of sparkling gold gas was expelled.
“Doctor?” Jack said, alarmed, stepping forward.
“Jack,” he looked up at his friend. “Something’s gone wrong. I think… M’having regeneration sickness.”
Rose started to cry again, but he couldn’t respond. Everything in his belly felt white-hot, twisting in on itself.
Jack was at his side, having abandoned Rose, leaving her to stand by one of the coral struts. “Doctor! What is it?”
The Doctor removed one of the hands from his belly and grunted in pain. He reached unsteadily into his pocket and pulled out his sonic. “Setting 3508b. It’ll take you back to the manor,” he directed Jack in an agonized voice. The pain came again, and he doubled over with it, folding over the hands wrapped around his middle and groaning. He really had to tell Jack what to do right now, so he fought off the inevitable sleep. When he opened his mouth, however, another puff of the regeneration energy came out before he could speak.
“Call Martha, get her to the manor to check on Rose. Call Sarah Jane. She’s been through this before,” he ground out, still folded over, raising his head. His voice was more of a groan and he struggled to breathe. His head felt as if it were going to explode, and he bit his lip on a scream when the pain tore through his back and down his legs. It left him even more unsteady, and he fell over against the console. “M’gonna pass out, soon, Jack. I’ll be alright, just let me sleep. Help Rose all you can. S’too much for her, s’too much…” He moaned and tears pricked his eyes. Only a few seconds left. “Get Martha and Sarah Jane. Call Jackie and Mickey, get them there, too. Don’t leave Rose.”
“I won’t, Doctor. She’ll be fine.”
He felt the dark of unconsciousness bearing down on him, tunneling his vision even as he slid down the console. He meant for his voice to carry, but it might have been just a whisper when he called out, “I love you, Rose.”
Notes:
Into every ship, a little angst must come...
Remember how I said a while back I thought this fic was going to top out at about 28 chapters?
LOLNO. We're in this for a while.Poor AllegoricalRose. She didn't plan on this behemoth when she signed up for a secret Santa gift. Bless her heart. I'm sorry, AR.
Chapter 23: At the Manor
Summary:
Arriving at the manor, the immediate aftermath of the regeneration.
Notes:
Part of this chapter is an unapologetic love note to Nine. I am going to miss him so.
This chapter, like every previous chapter of this story, was beta'd by TenRoseForeverAndEver, who is the absolute best. She keeps me on schedule, keeps me thinking of better ways of saying/doing things, she somehow keeps from ranting at me when I'm unbelievably frustrating and keeps the adverbs to an absolute minimum.
That said, any and all mistakes are mine and mine alone.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
The ‘Doctor’ had passed out; his last words, before collapsing, words of love for her. She’d approached him when he fainted, hoping that he would burst into flame again and bring her Doctor, her alalia, back.
He hadn’t. He'd just lay there, looking as if he were merely asleep.
Following the ‘Doctor’s’ instructions prior to his collapse, Jack flew the TARDIS back to the manor and it parked itself directly in Rose and the Doctor’s room. Jack ran to the library to ask Pete and Jake for help, and together the three of them lay the ‘Doctor’s’ limp form on the bed while she watched, numb.
Jack came to her and put his hands on her shoulders, kissing her forehead. A brotherly, protective gesture. “You okay, Rosie?”
Rose didn’t answer directly, she just looked over to the stranger occupying her and her Doctor’s bed and, after a moment, nodded.
“No, you're not. I know it’s a lot to take in right now, Rosie, but I promise everything's alright. I’ve got to make the calls the Doctor told me to-”
“He’s not the Doctor.” Her voice wasn’t fierce or angry. She sounded resigned.
Jack sighed. “Let me make the calls he told me to and then get out of these clothes.” He indicated his shirt, stained red with blood. “Then I’ll come back and we’ll talk. Okay?” He laid one hand on her cheek, then pulled her in for a warm hug. “It’s alright, Rosie. Or, at least, it’s going to be. I promise. Believe me?”
She just nodded.
“I’m going to leave Jake and Pete here with you until I can get back. They’re good people, Rose. They won’t hurt you.”
Rose looked at the two men Jack was referring to. Pete, her father’s doppelganger, was a middle-aged man in an oxford and trousers. She assumed that he had, at some point, been wearing a jacket and tie, but it was gone now. Probably lost in all of the turmoil of the last few hours. He looked older than he had in 1987, but of course he would... So did her mother.
The other man, the man she assumed was ‘Jake’, was a bit closer to her age. He had platinum blonde hair that was spiked up on top of his head and wore black clothes that looked similar to the tactical gear some of the people from UNIT wore.
Both were smiling bracingly at her, and Pete nodded. “We’re safe as houses, Rose. You can trust me on this.”
He looked really pleased when he said this, as if he’d just told her a little secret, and it sprung to mind to ask him if that meant she couldn’t trust him on anything else. But she didn’t: she just wasn’t up to it. Being cheeky in that moment didn’t appeal to her at all. So Rose gave him a quick little nod, then looked to Jack. “Go on. I’ll be fine.”
“I’ll be right in my room if you need me. Won’t be ten minutes.”
“S’okay, Jack. Go do what you need to do. The blood…” she shuddered. “I don’t want to see you like this. Go. Get changed.”
He kissed her on her forehead again then looked down at her. “I’ll be right back.” Then he left, pulling out his phone as he went and starting to dial.
Rose looked over at the new ‘Doctor’ and wondered what to do. He lay, sleeping, looking incredibly peaceful. The mere sight broke Rose of her stupor and pushing her into a righteous anger. She was miserable, her world had been turned upside down, nothing would ever be the same for her again, and this man - this imposter - was the cause of all of it. Yet he was sleeping peacefully as if he’d done nothing wrong and hadn’t a care in the world... on her bed! The absolute nerve of this bastard!
Pete spoke up. “Um, Rose? Perhaps you’d want to,” he coughed uncomfortably. “Would you want to change your clothes?”
Rose looked down at herself. The empire-waist, flow-y top she’d bought only a couple of weeks before, the last time she’d gone shopping with her mum, was ruined. The tiny pink rosebuds that had been printed all over her shirt had been smeared with blood.
Just before tea, during the Manchester and West Ham match, her Doctor had put his hands on this shirt at her Mum’s flat, when it was clean, and bent low to put his lips against her belly. He had whispered love to their children, delighted and proud when they squirmed against his hands.
She looked out of the window. It was dusk now. That had happened only a few hours ago. Now she was covered in blood, her face stained with tears. She was a mess, but she didn’t care. Couldn’t care.
She had the ridiculous, random urge to find out who had won the match. Something - anything - normal and sane in her life would be welcome.
“No, actually, I think I’d prefer to stay here until Jack comes back.” Her voice was firm, almost daring them to contradict her.
Pete nodded, putting his hands in his pockets. “Quite right.” Jake looked at her with something like admiration.
She pondered the two of them, remembering what Pete had told her less than an hour before.
“You two are from another universe?”
“Yes,” Pete answered.
“But you can’t get back?”
“No,” he answered again.
Jake pulled out a large, round, yellow button and held it up for her. Speaking for the first time, he said, “This was our dimension hopper. Doesn’t work now, of course.”
“And your Torchwood is destroyed. I guess it doesn’t matter. They didn’t have the technology to make this anyway. So…” he sighed. “It looks like we’re going to be on this Earth for a while.”
Rose regarded them both carefully. “Did you leave behind families?”
“I’m an orphan,” Jake volunteered. “There’s no one who’ll miss me, ‘cept my best mate Rickey.” Rose nodded, accepting his words.
Pete answered her. “Only my sister, Maureen. Mo. She hates me anyway, so she’ll probably be glad to be shot of me for a while.”
“You had a sister here named Maureen. This you, I mean,” she said to Pete, stumbling a bit. “This universe’s version of you. He had a sister named Maureen, called Mo. She’s my Mum’s best friend.” Then she looked at Jake. “M’sorry about your best mate.”
Jake shrugged, but looked sad. “He worked for Torchwood as well, so he understood that one day I might not come back. We always knew it. Were a bit surprised, actually, every time I did come back. I’ll miss him, but he’ll be alright.”
“You’re… You’re pregnant, then?” Pete asked, indicating her belly.
Rose brought her hands up to cover the swell of her stomach. “Yeah. Twin girls. Twenty-four weeks along now.”
“Congratulations!” Jake gave her a genuine smile. Pete looked at her a bit oddly, but smiled anyway. Rose understood; she felt distinctly strange around him as well. These should have been his - her father’s - granddaughters.
She liked these men, in spite of the complete oddity of the situation. She perceived no threat from either of them, which was a small relief. She’d had enough fear and anxiety for one day.
Changing her mind, she said, “If you don’t mind, I think I will clean up a bit, actually.” It was unnerving to look down at herself and see blood smeared over her belly, and she wanted to get rid of as much of the evidence of the evening’s events as she could.
“Go right ahead,” Pete said. “We’ll stay right here.”
“You’re welcome to make yourself comfortable on the couch,” she’d said. “There’s a telly, too, if you care to watch.”
“We’ll just wait for Jack to get back, I suspect.”
“When he does come back, tell him that I’m getting cleaned up and I’ll be out in a bit, to wait for me.”
“Will do,” Jake said.
Rose went to the chest of drawers that held the Doctor’s jumpers and pulled one out before she went to her own drawers and selected some maternity jeans. She tried to be as discreet as possible when she pulled out knickers and a bra, and the two men turned their heads politely.
“Be back soon,” Rose said, and went into their en-suite.
She turned the water on, as hot as the Doctor would allow her, almost hearing his chiding voice in the background. She stripped off her blood-stained clothes and climbed in. His soap and shampoo sat in the corner, and she pulled the bottle to herself, opening it. His smell surrounded her, and she slid down the wall until she sat on the floor with the shower spraying water on her, sobbing her grief and confusion.
~*~O~*~
Jack was dressing the Doctor in a pair of his own pajamas when Rose came back in, and he turned to look at her. Her eyes were red and puffy, but her was face clean of makeup and her hair damp. His heart broke for her and he wanted nothing more than to take all of the pain and confusion she must be feeling away from her.
“Jack? What are you doing?”
“Figured he’d be more comfortable sleeping this way instead of in his jeans and leather coat,” he answered. “You’re not supposed to be lifting, so you can’t do it. I’ve done my best to respect his privacy, don’t worry.” He threw Rose a cheeky grin over his shoulder.
Rose didn’t answer, and he just turned back to his work, sliding a pair of flannel pajama pants up the Doctor’s new legs. He’d already wrangled the unconscious man into a vest top. “For such a skinny bloke, he sure is a dead weight,” Jack muttered.
“Where are Pete and Jack?” Rose asked from behind him.
“They’re in the TARDIS. I wasn’t sure what to do with them, didn’t know if you’d want them staying in the house or not. The TARDIS gave each of them clothes and rooms, so you don’t have to decide right now.”
Rose nodded. “The TARDIS didn’t seem that put out by them when they were there earlier. I’m sure she’ll be fine with them being there.”
He kept working. “I spoke with your mom and Mickey. They’ll be here in an hour or so. Sarah Jane can’t make it until the morning.”
Rose nodded to indicate she’d heard what he said, but he didn’t see. “There.” Jack finished and pulled the covers up over the Doctor.
“Is he alright?” Rose asked, the words seeming to spring from her, unbidden.
“I think so. He said he just needs to sleep a while.”
“He’s sleeping in my bed.”
He braced himself, preparing to defend the sleeping Doctor. He wasn't feeling up to the argument or carrying the man to another room. “Rose -”
“I have some questions for you,” she abruptly changed the subject, her voice steely. And there. There was that fire he was used to hearing in her voice. Jack felt so relieved he almost didn’t feel nervous about the conversation he was about to have.
Jack turned to her. “I suppose you do. You have every right to.”
“Did you know about this?” She indicated the Doctor.
“Regeneration?”
“Yeah.”
“Yes. Time Agents were aware of Time Lords, and knew they had the ability to regenerate. The Doctor is the first Time Lord I ever met, though, so it was only a legend for me. Still, I wasn’t completely surprised when he did it.”
“And he never told me.” It was a statement, not a question.
“You’ll have to talk to him about that.” Jack felt like a jerk for deflecting her, but he honestly didn’t know why the Doctor had never told her about it.
“How did you survive being shot? You don’t even seem hurt.”
He pursed up his lips, wincing a bit, and held out his hand to the sofa. “Let’s sit down while we talk, alright?”
She followed the guidance of his hand, then sat down.
He shifted in his seat, trying to get comfortable before he dove into this decidedly uncomfortable conversation. “Rose, I need you to understand a couple of things up front. First of all, I’m not angry. I was upset for a time, but not anymore. The second is that it’s not your fault. None of it is your fault. And last, everything we did, we did to protect you.”
“I'm glad you're not angry, because I am. I don’t need protection, Jack,” she spat. “I hate when you two treat me like some delicate, little tchotchke. And what’s not my fault?”
Jack heaved a sigh. “I died on the Gamestation, Rose. I took a blast from a Dalek, right in the chest. I was dead. But when you came back as Bad Wolf, you brought me back to life.”
Rose looked pained. This was never Rose's favorite topic and he hated to put more stress on her, but Jack forged ahead. He needed to get this out before he couldn’t - or before Rose beat it out of him. He wouldn’t put it past her. He was a brave man, but he wasn’t sure he could handle either of the choices in front of him. Time to pick the lesser of the two evils.
“But you didn’t just bring me back to life, you… you gave me eternal life, Rosie. I’m immortal now.”
She just blinked at him. “What? You mean you can’t…”
“I can never die, Rosie. And that’s okay!” he said, reaching across to put his hand on hers, seeing her mouth open and heading off what he was sure she would say. “It’s alright. I wouldn’t want to leave you, anyway.”
“But why did you never tell me?” Her voice sounded wavery, almost brittle.
Jack silently cursed himself and the Doctor for leaving so much unknown for Rose. “At first we didn’t know exactly what we were dealing with. The Doctor ran all sorts of tests and we figured it out just before he told me about the babies. I guess…” He heaved a weary sigh, “I guess the Doctor didn’t want to upset you, considering you were pregnant. We thought we were protecting you.”
It was the wrong thing to say, and he knew it as soon as the words left his lips. Rose didn’t appreciate mollycoddling, and the Doctor’s constant need to protect her from everything had grated sometimes. Something this big… he blew out his breath.
“Are there any more secrets you two kept from me?”
“No, Rosie. I swear.”
She looked at Jack hard, and he met her gaze, willing her to believe him.
“I trusted you. I trusted both of you.” Her voice was quiet. Detached. Almost dangerous.
Jack was unnerved to hear her this way.
“Rosie, I didn’t-”
“You lied to me!” she burst out, her eyes flashing with anger.
“I didn’t want to. But I didn’t want you to feel guilty for what had happened, either. It wasn’t your fault.”
Her emotional roller-coaster continued and she burst into tears, collapsing against Jack’s chest. “I’m so sorry, Jack. I’m so sorry,” she wept.
He couldn’t stand seeing her upset but on the other hand, he was relieved that she wasn’t trying to throttle him. Like he deserved, his guilty conscience reminded him. All of the conflicting emotions warred with each other, and left him feeling wretched. But he didn’t have time to feel anything other than concern for the small, blonde, pregnant woman in his arms.
“Shhh, Rosie. It’s alright. You didn’t mean to, and I’m not upset.”
“And now he’s gone and I’ll never see him again…”
“He’s not gone, Rosie.” Jack stroked her back up and down, trying to calm her. “He’s there, over on your bed. He’s just a bit different.”
“I don’t want different! I want my Doctor!”
“I know, sweetheart. I know.”
~*~O~*~
After crying on Jack for a spell, Rose pulled herself together and took up vigil beside the Doctor’s bed to wait for the influx of people that Jack had called. She didn’t know how much time had passed, but it really didn’t matter.
Jack was telling her that this was her Doctor, just in a new body. She remembered that, before he had flown off from her mum's flat in the TARDIS, he’d told her that he’d be back for her even if he looked different.
He couldn't possibly have meant this, though. Could he?
Rose had seen all manner of impossible things. She’d seen Slitheen zipping themselves into the bodies of dead humans. She’d seen gaseous aliens take over the bodies of the dead. She’d seen the dead animated and forced to work for the Jagrafess on Satellite Five.
She had seen some remarkable, unbelievable things happen to dead bodies.
The man sleeping on her bed had assured her that none of those things were what had happened to him, and that he was just a completely new man - changed, yet somehow still her husband.
Her Doctor would have told her about this. She was sure of it. He wouldn’t have done this to her. He wouldn’t have left her alone and afraid with someone else masquerading as him. He wouldn’t have left her and the babies. He promised he wouldn’t. He promised her. He had looked her in the eyes and he had promised.
He’d lied.
She missed him so much it ached. He’d have been able to explain what was happening, what had happened.
But it didn’t matter.
Nothing mattered right now. Her Doctor was gone. There was someone - some imposter - lying in their bed who was not her husband, and she was struggling to care about anything, anything at all. Nothing mattered if he wasn’t there to share it with her.
~*~O~*~
When Martha arrived, she insisted on doing a quick exam to check for shock and make sure that Rose and the babies were alright. Rose had submitted only after a stern look from Jack, and a few minutes later Martha reported to her and Jack that, except for slightly elevated blood pressure, Rose and both babies all seemed to be fine. Jack had sighed in relief. Rose was glad that the girls were okay, but she couldn’t manage a smile. She was hovering somewhere between sorrow and apathy.
Martha then turned her attentions to the Doctor, checking him over.
She put the chestpiece of her stethoscope on his chest on one side, then the other. “Chest sounds are good. He’s breathing comfortably, his temperature is 26.4 - which is good - and both hearts are beating steadily.”
Rose looked up sharply. “He’s got two hearts?”
Martha nodded.
“He’s got hearts like the Doctor?” she reiterated and pointed to the man lying in her bed.
The young doctor offered the stethoscope to her. “Listen for yourself.”
Rose went over to the sleeping man and put the stethoscope in her ears. She pressed the chestpiece to one side of his chest, careful not to touch him, closed her eyes, and listened. A steady thump, thump filled her ears. Moving the chestpiece over, she did it again. Another steady thump, thump came through the earpieces.
Two heartbeats.
Could it really be?
No. Her Doctor was dead. This man was an imposter. It must be some sort of trick, but she’d sort it all out once he woke up. She’d make him give her the real Doctor back.
~*~O~*~
Rose’s mother and Mickey had been the next to arrive, and Jackie had rushed to Rose, wrapping her daughter in her arms. Rose allowed herself to let go as her mother held her, sobbing into the safety of her Mum’s neck.
“What the hell’s going on? Where’s the Doctor? What happened to Rose?” Jackie demanded over Rose’s shoulder, all in one breath.
“It’s okay, Jacks,” Jack assured her in a placating tone. “Stay calm...”
“I will not! Something is clearly going on, something has upset my daughter and the Doctor isn’t here! Tell me what’s happening!”
Martha stepped forward, her hands out and patting the air in a calming gesture. “Rose is fine. The babies are fine. She’s just upset. Understandably upset.”
“Where’s the Doctor?”
Jack indicated the bed. “That’s him. He’s regenerated.”
“The hell does that mean?” Mickey asked, his voice sounding confused over Rose’s racking sobs.
“He was going to die, so he changed every cell in his body to heal himself. He’s the same man, he just looks different,” Jack explained. Rose cried harder into Jackie’s shoulder
“He’s gone, Mum,” Rose bawled. “He’s gone. S’just me and the babies.”
Jackie just stroked Rose’s hair. There wasn’t anything to say, really. The soothing nonsense Jackie murmured to a distraught Rose did nothing to calm her. So Jackie led her daughter over to the couch in front of the fireplace and held her, rocking her gently, just as she had when Rose was little and had needed to be soothed after a particularly bad dream.
Rose cried and cried until she couldn’t anymore, wrapped in the comforting arms of her mother.
~*~O~*~
It was well after midnight and Rose hadn’t slept in nineteen hours. She felt her ability to focus diminish, the conversations around her becoming a swirl of words that blended into one another. Besides that, the once comforting presence of her mum, Mickey, Martha, and Jack began to feel a bit smothering. Her mother and Jack were constantly within arm’s reach, and each of them had spent time with their arm around her, each of them supportive and protective in turn.
After nodding off on Jack’s shoulder for the second time, she asked to be left alone. There was a bit of light protesting, but she insisted. Eventually all of the people who loved her had left reluctantly, leaving her alone with the new ‘Doctor’.
She sat in the chair by the bed - the one that the Doctor had always tossed his jacket over at the end of the day - and leaned closer to look at the man on the bed. She stared at him, studying his face carefully, trying to see her Doctor in him - if there was any. He looked entirely different to her.
Her Doctor’s face, his beloved face, had been dominated by his large, patrician nose. His ears had been overlarge and he’d hated them. She had loved them, finding them charming. They had fit his personality well.
This man, the man lying in front of her, had an unremarkable pair of ears and his nose was a bit pointy and a lot smaller. More aesthetically pleasing, she reckoned. Much more movie-star.
Her Doctor’s soft hair - grown out just the tiniest bit from the short military-style cut that he’d favored - had been dark, almost black. She’d loved running her fingers through it and he’d almost cooed when she did, bumping his head up against her hand if she stopped, like a cat. It had always made her laugh.
This ‘Doctor’ had a thick shock of brown hair, artfully tousled.
The scruff that her Doctor had grown out in the last few weeks had covered the distinctive mole on his cheek and softened the angles of his face, even if he’d griped good-naturedly about it being itchy. He’d told her that he didn’t feel like shaving anymore...why shave when he could be spending time with her? She’d teased him, saying that he was just trying to get into her knickers with such sweet talk. He had only winked in reply, giving her the bright smile that he saved only for her.
This man’s face was bare, clean shaven save for some sideburns that were a bit longer than necessary. His chin was a bit pointed, like his nose, his skin smooth with a smattering of freckles. When he had smiled at her, just after the flames of regeneration had receded, it had looked completely different from her Doctor’s. It felt much more...more Hollywood.
Her Doctor had exuded strength, even in the quiet moments that they were alone. He was tall and built like a runner, with the defined muscles of an athlete. Strong and capable. He’d felt solid to her, both emotionally and physically. She’d felt safe with him; the safest she’d ever felt.
This man was built entirely differently. He was leaner, thinner than her Doctor. In fairness, she’d only been around him while he was awake for a very few minutes, and those minutes had been tense, to say the least. She’d not been paying much attention to how he looked. Now he was lying under blankets.
Her Doctor’s face - the face that he’d called ‘daft’ more than once - had been the most wonderful thing she’d ever seen. He’d taken her all over the universe to show her the most beautiful things he could think of, and his face had beaten them all, by far. She’d loved every line, every crease, every angle...every inch of him.
But the man who now lay in her bed and claimed to be her husband...could he be? He’d appeared wearing the Doctor’s clothes. He knew quite a bit about her. He had two hearts. Her Doctor had told her he’d be himself, even if he looked different. Was it even possible? Heavens knew she’d seen more unusual and unbelievable things than this in her travels with him.
She had to admit that he was terribly fit. In her former life - before she ran away to the stars with the man she’d fallen in love with - she might have tried to make a pull. He looked like the type of bloke she’d always been interested in, before. But that was before. Now, she was completely in love with and committed to her Doctor.
Her Doctor who was gone now.
Her Doctor who had left her in a blinding pillar of flame.
Her Doctor, whom she would never see again.
All she wanted was to feel his arms around her again. To hear him whisper his love into her ear with his dulcet voice, accented as if he were from the north and not another planet.
Tears pricked her eyes and she pulled the sleeves of her (his) jumper over her hands, hiding her fingers. She crossed her arms over her belly, cradling their children, and cried.
Sleep took her shortly after, while the tears were still wet on her cheeks.
~*~O~*~
’Rose.'
He spoke to her in her dream, his voice soft and warm, wrapping around her like a blanket.
Rose ran to him, joy blooming in her heart. She reached for him, her hand passing through nothing. He was a projection, just as he had been when he sent her back from the Gamestation. ’Doctor,’ she whimpered. ’Please come back to me.
’I haven’t left you, Rose. I told you I never would, and I didn’t.’
’He’s not you, she cried, despair overtaking her, even in her dreams. ’He’s not you.
’It’s me. I’m him, Rose.’
’But I need you!’
Her Doctor reached forward and suddenly she could feel him, his hand wrapped around hers. Rolling waves of love, remorse and hope washed over her.
’Believe in me, Rose. I love you. I haven’t left you. I’ll never leave you.’
Rose basked in the feel of him before she realized - his hand wasn’t calloused. It felt leaner, thinner somehow. It wasn’t her Doctor’s hand. It was the hand of an impostor.
Notes:
My dad's name is 'Rickie'. It's not short for 'Richard', that's his actual name. I have a hell of a time writing 'Rickey' as a result.
That's your non-sequitur of the day.
Edit - 3/21/16 - found a continuity error and changed a couple of sentences to fix it.
Chapter 24: Waking Up
Summary:
The Doctor wakes up to find himself regenerated.
Notes:
I've threatened TenRoseForeverAndEver with writing credit more than once because she's come up with some really great rewrites of some bland lines in this fic. This chapter was no exception.
Credit for a line in this chapter also goes to my dear friend Jessie (Awesteiney), whom I am trying to suck down the Doctor/Rose fanfiction rabbit hole, and giving her credit seemed like yet another useful tool for doing that. Y'all give her some love if you can. I want her to come play with us!
Posting early for Hanluvr, who wanted to read before she went to work. <3 I hope it starts your day off right, dear!
From this chapter on, you'll be getting a bit of fluff mixed in with the angst. The chapter I'm writing today (I won't reveal which one, but I'm a fair bit ahead) is actually more fluff than anything else. But in the chapter I'm writing today, our heroes get back to smooching! (And maybe some sexytimes later?)
Anyway, hope you enjoy! Yay!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
The Doctor had awoken from his sleep feeling physically excellent, but with the sensation of something weighing on him, telepathically and emotionally. Something wasn’t right. He’d slept eleven hours, thirty seven minutes and forty two seconds, making the time now 5:32am. Blimey. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d slept that long. But that was the kind of effect Rose had on him, he supposed.
Wait. Where was Rose? She wasn't in bed beside him, and she was not an early riser.
Something definitely felt off.
Throwing off the covers, he tried to think. He didn’t remember getting into bed, or putting on the pajamas he wore. He squinted down at his legs. Come to think of it, how did he get into his pajamas?
“Rose?” he called out, but a different voice escaped from his mouth, with a light, estuary accent instead of the northern tones he’d grown accustomed to.
What the hell?
That nudging in his subconscious telling him that something was amiss suddenly made a lot more sense. In a flood of memories that hit him with all the force of a tsunami, he remembered the events of the last day: waking up in this very bed with Rose, going to Jackie’s, the ‘ghosts’ appearing all around, going to Torchwood, the daleks, the cybermen, the sudden arrival of Pete Tyler and Jake Simmonds, Jack being shot, and then searing, blinding pain when he was shot himself.
He remembered the intense fear that he wouldn’t be able to regenerate and the equally intense fear and guilt because he’d never told Rose that regeneration could happen. He recalled the look of desperation, fear, and grief when she saw him lying wounded on the grating. The horror on her face when she’d seen the new him.
He groaned a little and scrubbed his face with his hands. He’d fucked things up right proper this time. Nice one, Doctor.
Looking around the room and peering against the low light of the wee morning hours, he recognized his surroundings. He was back in the manor, in his and Rose’s bedroom.
Rose. He needed to find Rose. He had a lot of explaining to do...some groveling probably wouldn’t go amiss, either.
A little whimper came from the far side of the large bed. The Doctor turned to find Rose asleep in the armchair nearby, the one he always threw his jacket over. She’d pulled her feet under her, curling around the babies, and her head was leaning on the wingback of the chair. Her hands rested on her belly, gentle against the wool of one of his jumpers. Her eyes were red and puffy - even in sleep - and she looked anything but peaceful. Her face was screwed up against some unpleasant thought or another that was invading her slumber.
The Doctor had a suspicion as to what it may be.
She shivered, her brow creasing even deeper, and the Doctor got up from the bed as quickly as he could, rushing around to her side without waking her. She was cold, and that wouldn’t do. He grabbed her blanket from the foot of the bed: the pink one that he’d bought for her at the Lunar Festival on Ram. He’d bought it a couple of months after they started traveling together... well after he’d fallen arse-over-teakettle for the tiny little slip of a girl, but long before he could admit it to himself.
He’d chosen it because it was soft and pink, like her, and he’d thought it would make her smile. It had. It was her favorite blanket, the one she liked cuddling with the most, and she’d kept it in the library where they’d spent many nights together, reading or talking or watching telly. Her scent had lingered on that blanket, even when she wasn’t around, and he loved it almost as much as she did. The pink clashed with the gold and blue decor of their master bedroom, but neither of them cared. That blanket was precious to both of them, so it remained on their bed.
With soft, gentle movements, he crept close and lay it across her. She smiled a little when it settled over her and she pulled it up higher over her chest, then put her hands back on her belly in her sleep.
He spoke her name softly, and she stirred just a bit.
“I haven’t left you, Rose. I told you I never would, and I didn’t.”
Rose muttered, which told him that she was awake enough to take in what he was saying. He kept up with his peaceful, calming reassurances.
“It’s me. I’m him, Rose.”
She whimpered again, and his hearts broke.
He could soothe her, if she’d let him. He could assure her that he was still her Doctor.
He could do it, even if she didn’t let him. He could do it right now.
He looked down at her hand for just a moment, the sparkle of her engagement ring catching his eye, debating the morality of what he was about to do. They were bonded; there was a bit of her in him and a bit of him in her. He wasn’t trying to see into her thoughts. He just wanted to project his love for her across their bond, and they had to be touching for that to happen.
He needed her to believe him. He needed to touch her to prove himself. They were bonded. She wouldn’t be happy right now, but she would feel so much better once she understood that he was who he said he was.
Desperation made fools of wise men, and the Doctor was most definitely desperate.
Mind made up, the Doctor nodded to himself resolutely. He reached out and took her hand, his touch delicate, and sent soft waves of love to her.
He whispered to her, even as he felt her happiness and relief coming back to him. “Believe in me, Rose. I love you. I haven’t left you, I’ll never leave you.”
Rose sighed happily in her sleep and his hearts fluttered, a single beam of bright hope shining in his mind. He squeezed her hand a little, impulsively, feeling tears of gratitude prick his eyes. She sensed him, he could feel it. He could tell. She knew it was him. Rose loved him, she’d always love him. He felt it, he knew it. He had no idea what kind of man he was yet, but it didn’t matter. He was the Doctor and she loved him.
Suddenly, she stiffened and he felt a shock of fear, pulsing and mauve, shoot across their bond like a lightning strike.
Rose’s eyes flew open and she bolted to her feet, jerking her hand back from his and severing the bond painfully, knocking the armchair back a few inches. Her legs tangled in the pink blanket he’d put over her and she stumbled. The Doctor reached for her, but she regained her balance before he could touch her and scrambled back, away from him.
“Rose...” he began.
”Jack!” she yelled, her voice laced with panic.
She held up one hand in a warding-off gesture and the other wrapped around the babies, backing away until her rear end bumped against the couch.
“Rose, please. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Please, please listen to me.”
”JACK!” she cried out again, and the Doctor felt that old flame of anger and jealousy flare to life. He forced it down and away. He didn’t have time for petty, bullshit jealousy right now, he had to convince his wife of who he was. He put his hands up in what he hoped was a placating, calming manner.
“It’s okay, Rose, it’s alright. I’m not going to hurt you; I never could. I just want to talk to you. Please.”
Jack burst through the door into the room, quickly scanning the scene before him with the trained eye of a soldier. It took only a second before he seemed to realize what was going on and stepped towards Rose with his hands up, making the same calming motion as the Doctor. “Rosie, it’s okay.”
The Doctor took a step towards her. “Rose, please. Just...just listen to me.”
She looked towards Jack who nodded. “Give him a chance, Rosie.”
Rose looked back to the Doctor, her eyes wide and alarmed. The urge to hold her, to kiss her until she would never be afraid again was nearly overpowering, but that would terrify her right now. He had to take this slowly, he had to be gentle. She was sure to be livid with him in addition to being afraid of what she’d seen. Pushing her, coming on too strong...that could ruin everything.
The Doctor took another couple of steps toward her, slowly, like one would approach a wounded animal.
“Please let me explain myself, Rose. I’m not a nutter, and I won’t hurt you. I won’t hurt the babies. I just want to talk to you. I want to explain what’s happened...just want to help you understand.”
She watched him carefully, then gave him a slow nod. His shoulders sagged with relief.
Jack stepped forward and kissed the side of her head in reassurance; Rose never took her suspicious eyes off the Doctor. “I’m just down the hall if you need me, alright? But it’s okay. You won’t need me. Just listen to him,” he told her.
“We’ll be fine, Jack.” The Doctor didn’t lift his eyes from Rose, either, but his were pleading.
Jack nodded and left, leaving Rose alone with him.
Where to begin? There was so much to tell her, so much to apologize for. The overwhelming need to make her understand.
The truth was his only salvation here. His only hope was that it would be so strange, she’d have no choice but to believe it.
“I owe you explanations and apologies,” he started.
“My Doctor said he was the last one,” she interrupted. “The last Time Lord. How come you have two hearts?”
“Because I am the last of the Time Lords. I’m the only one, Rose. I’m still me.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“I know you don’t. I know you’re scared and confused and angry. But remember what you told your mum yesterday? About the ‘ghosts’? You said, ‘it doesn’t change it if you don’t believe it’. No matter what you think right now, I’m the Doctor. It’s a fact, Rose.”
“If you heard that conversation then you also remember the Doctor telling my mum that the dead don’t come back. They stay dead.”
“And that’s very true. But I didn’t die. I regenerated so I wouldn’t die. It’s a little Time Lord trick: a way of cheating death.”
“He died.” Rose’s voice caught on the word and she took a second to gather herself, clearing her throat and putting her shoulders back bravely. “My Doctor died and he burned. I saw it,” she asserted.
“If I wasn’t the Doctor, how would I remember everything about us? And I do. I remember every moment with you, Rose Tyler.”
“Maybe you used some sort of…” she moved her hand in a swirling gesture, giving herself time to think. “Mind meld or something.”
His clever Rose. His precious girl.
The Doctor chuckled, and she narrowed her eyes at him. “What’s so funny?”
“I’m just remembering the first time we met. With the autons and the nestene consciousness. I took your hand in that basement and we ran away to the lift. You asked me if it was students who were playing a prank. I remember thinking then how clever you were.”
“That wasn’t you. How do you know that?”
Bloody hell, she’s stubborn, he thought. Usually her utter resolve and steely backbone in the face of danger was a source of pride for him. Right now, it was a hindrance. “Because it was me, Rose. In another body.”
She shook her head, a denial.
“Please, Rose, can I…?” He stepped forward with his hands outstretched, reaching for her belly. The urge to touch her, to put his hands over the place where his daughters grew was fierce and overriding his good sense.
Rose darted away from him, slapping his hands away before stepping to the side and clutching her belly, a blazing, ferocious look in her eyes.
“Don’t touch me,” she snarled at him. “Don't’ touch them.”
”Blimey,” the Doctor muttered, managing to catch himself just before anything else escaped his traitor of a mouth.
She was beautiful in that moment, as beautiful as he had ever seen her. Her whisky-brown eyes were now a shimmering, fierce gold, her chest heaved beneath his maroon jumper, her hands guarded their children in her belly with fingers spread wide; she was a mother wolf protecting her young, and the Doctor was fascinated by her.
He also realized almost at once that he had pressed too far, too fast. He elected to pull back, to be a bit less aggressive in his work to convince her. Owing to that, he didn’t follow her, just turned to face her.
He tried to put his hands in his pockets and discovered that there weren’t any. At a loss as to what to do, he reached up to ruffle his hair at the nape of his neck. Oh, that’s going to be a nervous tic in this body. Suppose it beats being a gruff arsehole when I’m frustrated, like the last one.
Trying again, he said, “I understand that this is hard for you to accept, but I need you to believe me. I need you to remember me, if not for me, for the babies. For our girls. Smidgen and Moppet.”
“You don’t get to call them that,” she hissed. “Their father gave them those names. You don’t get to use them.”
“Rose, I am their father,” he insisted, the question of his paternity immediately making him forget his resolve to be calm and not pushy. He scrubbed his face with his hands in irritation, taking a moment to fight down the frustration that was flooding his system. “I remember everything, because it happened to me. The babies are girls. They were conceived in Kyoto, the first time we made love. You took the Time Vortex into you shortly after, and Bad Wolf made us compatible enough for you to get pregnant. We spent a week at your mother’s after that, and when we got back to the ship, I smelled your hormones.”
Her eyes sparkled with sudden, unshed tears. He could feel just a little of the tension leave the bunched muscles of his new shoulders as she started to acknowledge him, and he nodded his head towards her left hand. “I bought you that ring when we were visiting your mother, just before we went to Cardiff and fought Margaret the Slitheen. I bought the chain your TARDIS key is on at the same time, but gave that to you that very night, in the chippie. It was almost our anniversary, but I couldn’t wait. You wore my coat that night, even though it wasn’t cold enough for you to need it. I always thought you did that just to tease me with your scent. Did you?”
Rose blinked at him, one tear slipping down her cheek.
He pressed ahead. “I proposed to you in the alley beside your mum’s building, but that wasn’t what I’d planned. I’d tried to propose several times before, but everything always got bollixed up and went all pear-shaped. (I really hate pears, by the way. Don’t ever let me eat a pear. ) That night, we went to dinner and you had scampi. You got sick on the riverwalk. Remember?”
She didn’t answer, just looked at him while a tear from the other eye teetered on her lower lashes, then plunged to her skin below.
“What will it take for me to convince you? Do you need more? I’ll be happy to tell you every moment of our life together, if that’s what will make you believe in me, Rose Tyler.
“You saved me the day after we met, by swinging out over the Nestene Consciousness to keep me from being killed by an auton. We went to Erash and ended up running from the Xofcal chieftain who wanted to marry you because he thought you were their goddess of wisdom. I wanted to run when your mother slapped me, but I couldn’t abandon you: you were too precious to me. Gave you the key you’re wearing around your neck that night because I knew I didn’t want you away from me. I wanted the TARDIS to be your home. Even then. Weeeell, before that, really. You were just brilliant -”
Rose sniffled, raising one hand to brush away the wetness on her cheeks. The Doctor made a move to step forward, but hesitated, once again suppressing his need to hold her.
“I told you you were beautiful the night we went to Cardiff and met the Gelth. I was a right arse to you that night, in more ways than one. I was an even bigger arse in 1987. We had a row in your parents’ flat and I told you I was leaving. I never could, Rose. I was just angry.”
“The reapers…” Rose began, then stopped and cleared her throat. “I created a paradox and they came…”
“Yes, but your father put everything right.” That bright ray of hope was beginning to shine again. She seemed to be warming to him just a little. Her posture was more relaxed, her eyes softer now. If he was clever, he just may be able to pull this off. And he was more than clever, more than brilliant even, he was a bloody genius. He could do this. “I was able to come back for you. Even then, I knew I could never leave you, Rose Tyler. Never.
“You came to check on me in my workshop after we left Utah. We collapsed over on the cushions in the corner and looked up at the astronomical projection. You started calling it my ‘enchanted ceiling’. Blimey, Rose, I was all gone for you then. After that, we found each other every night and spent time together, and it was the best part of every day.
“The first time I kissed you, in Cardiff, after Margaret, was one of the most wonderful moments of my life. Although, I have to say… It’s tied with finding out we were going to be the parents of twin girls a few weeks ago. I called them Moppet and Smidgen, and you told me it was silly. They like it, though, they squirm around when I talk to them.”
“Is it really you?” Her voice was a whisper.
“Yes. It’s me, Rose.” His hearts beat out a rapid, joyful jitterbug inside his ribcage. “I can prove it,” he said, his voice nearly as quiet as hers but full of hope. He took a tentative step forward, and this time she didn’t back away. “If you’ll let me, I can. We’re bonded, you and I. It was the first step of the marriage bond, and we did it the night we got engaged. You’ve felt me, in your mind. Part of me is with you, part of you is with me. If you’ll just let me touch you, you can feel me again and see that I’m the same. Please, Rose! I can prove to you, without any doubt, that it’s me. That I’m the same. I’m still your husband. And you are my wife. My alalia.”
He held out his hand, long-fingered and unfamiliar, and she considered it for a moment, eyes streaming. He wiggled his fingers at her with a smile, hoping to reassure her. Finally, after watching him carefully for a minute, she took her hand off her belly and reached for his.
As soon as his hand curled around hers he marveled that, no matter how different this body may be - and he didn’t know just how different it would be, yet - their hands still fit together perfectly. Differently, yes, but still perfectly. Their hands slid into each other and settled into place as if they were made for each other and he supposed that, in this case, his actually had been made for hers.
He lowered all of his defenses once they were touching to let her see him, all of him that he was able to show her through their incomplete bond without overpowering her currently fragile psyche.
Trying hard not to overwhelm her, he refrained from sending her the tidal wave of emotions he actually felt and concentrated on wrapping her consciousness with love, sending a feeling of protectiveness, remorse, and gratitude. He saw her, all glittering golden, cautious and so, so afraid, guarding the still-frail threads of the girls’ consciousnesses with a fiery protectiveness.
Before he was able to stop himself, he raised his hand to her face and brought his lips down to hers, strengthening their connection. She sent him a cautious little swell of acceptance, and it was the only excuse he needed. He stopped holding back, pouring all of his love and adoration across their link, mixed with certainty and apology, then elation when she sent him her love and relief. He deepened the kiss just a little and let go of the hand that had been holding hers, placing it on her belly. Oh, he’d been so worried about the girls; feeling the little thump against his hand was bliss.
He eased back from the connection, not wanting to shock either of them, reclaiming her hand and threading their fingers simply because he wanted to touch her.
Her cheeks were shining with tears, but she no longer looked bereft. She peered into his eyes for a long time and he didn’t blink or look away. She was searching for him, yearning to find something recognizable of the man she knew was buried deep inside this new packaging. He knew it, and couldn't blame her one bit. After a few long moments, she gave him a soft smile.
“It’s you,” she whispered, her smile growing a bit.
“Yeah,” he said on a relieved exhale. “It’s me.” He waved, with waggled fingers. “Hello!”
She brought her free hand up to lay against his cheek; he leaned into the touch, greedy for the feel of her on his new skin.
“Your eyes are brown.”
“Are they?” he chuckled. “I wouldn’t know. Haven’t seen myself yet.”
“They’re brown. So’s your hair.”
“Ah,” he said, too happy to do anything but smile. “Weeell, that’ll do, I suppose. Always wanted to be ginger. Next time, maybe.”
It was a complete shock when Rose removed her hand, reared back and slapped him across the face with all of her might.
Notes:
Sometimes, when I'm writing fic, things just happen and I decide to go with them. Pete and Jake joining us in this Earth and getting stuck is one of those things that just kind of poured from my fingers and surprised me. And, although I had a day or so lead time before I posted it, I didn't quite think of all the implications that introducing those two new characters would have on the story. It's created a bit more to write, and I'm sorry. I know I said this story would end at 28 chapters, and I still can, but I'll have to end it midway through the pregnancy with no babies if I do. There's lots more to tell here. I won't even speculate on how many more chapters we're looking at. I'm just kind of running where my thoughts take me to while still following the outline as best I can. I hope you guys can bear with me and aren't too upset about it.
TenRoseForeverAndEver and I were talking about it yesterday... Saturday night, I went out with some girlfriends and had an absolutely delicious meal. I had a craft burger that was amazing in every way, some perfectly cooked and perfectly seasoned sweet potato fries, and a draught apple cider that was crisp and cold and perfect. I've said perfect a lot, but that's because everything about it was wonderful.
Some fics and chapters in fic are like that.
Then there are other fics and chapters in fic that are like rice. They're not bad, really. They're filling. They get the job done. They're a good compliment to other things. But they're bland.
I feel like this chapter is rice, but there is really good stuff coming down the pike. Craft burgers and sweet potato fries, guys.
Chapter 25: Borrowing Trouble
Summary:
Rose and the Doctor do a bit more talking, and she does a bit more thinking.
Notes:
Tissue warning for this chapter.
*author tugs ear*
"Wellll... Not so much a tissue warning per se. Perhaps just a warning to keep a tissue handy, just in case. A tissue advisory, as it were. No! A tissue watch! HA! That's it, a tissue watch! You see, Dear Readers, a Tissue Warning would imply that an Event That Induces Weeping is on the ground and active, while a Tissue Watch merely implies that an Event That Induces Weeping is..."
*beta clears throat from the corner*
"Er, right. Yes. It would seem I was chasing rabbits. Funny phrase, that. 'Chasing rabbits.' As if I'm a dog or something. Do I look like a dog to you? I most certainly am not a dog, let me assure you. Now, my maiden name may be Fox, but that doesn't mean..."
"CAEDMON."
"Right. Yes. Enjoy your chapter, Dear Readers!"
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Smack!
The Doctor reeled backwards, covering his abused cheek with his hand and looking at Rose in shock and confusion.
“What the bloody hell was that for?”
“That was for you, you bloody... you complete arse! All this time! All those things we did, all that danger! And you never told me anything about this?!”
The pieces fell together and he only said, “Ah.”
“‘Ah’? Is that all you have to say for yourself? ‘Ah’!?”
He let go of his cheek to tug his ear. “Er, no, you’re right, of course. I rather deserved that.”
“Too bloody fucking right you did! You deserve much more than that!”
“I’m sorry, Rose. I’m so, so sorry. I should have told you.”
Rose let out a mirthless laugh. She raised her hands and turned away from him, and he knew from a long history with one Rose Marion Tyler that she was rolling her eyes towards the ceiling in disgust. “‘I should have told you’, he says. That’s what he has to say for himself. ‘I should have told you’.”
“Rose, be fair…” he began, then fought the urge to slap his own forehead in absolute dismay.
Wrong thing to say, Doctor.
She wheeled back around to face him, and he flinched when he saw the look in her eyes. “I will not be bloody-damn fair. You don’t deserve for me to be fair,” she snarled. “Would you like to know what’s not fair? Would you? Hmm? After fucking catching fire in front of me, and never telling me that it was something that you could do, you say, ‘I should have told you’ and then have the unmitigated balls to tell me to 'be fair.” She stepped forward, jabbing her finger in his chest. “You’re goddamn right you should have told me, Time Lord.”
“I didn’t know how.”
She laughed, and it was a hollow, brittle sound. “Oh, I don't know. How about, ‘by the way, Rose, if something happens to me I won’t die, I’ll simply regenerate, but don’t worry, it’ll still be me inside!’?” She waved her hand airily, in a mocking gesture.
“Would you have believed me, Rose?” he asked quietly.
Tears welled in her eyes and she didn’t stop them when they fell to her cheeks. Her voice was softer when she spoke this time, but somehow that made it more painful for him to hear. “I believed everything you told me. I never doubted you. I trusted you. Even after you sent me away from you at the Gamestation, I trusted you.”
He reached up to wipe the wetness away from her cheeks, and she allowed the touch. As soon as his skin made contact he felt a cacophony of emotions rolling from her in waves she wasn’t bothering to control. Fear, anger, relief, uncertainty, betrayal... and behind it all her bright, shining love for him. In return, he sent her a wave of apology.
“No,” she said, ducking her head away from his hand. “It’s not that easy. You don’t get to apologize and it’s all just suddenly alright. I don’t think you quite understand how angry I am.”
“I felt it, Rose.”
“Oh, you didn’t feel anything,” she spat. “When were you going to tell me this?”
“I tried to, before I left with Jack yesterday, but there was no time. I planned on telling you as soon as I got back.”
“But you didn’t, did you? You came back and died right in front of me. And suddenly there’s this new man who looks nothing like my husband telling me he is my husband? What was I supposed to believe?”
“You were supposed to believe me!” he said in a raised voice, not quite a shout, jabbing at his chest. “I told you, Rose! I told you then that I would still be myself, that I would never leave you. Why didn’t you believe me?”
“Do you have any idea what it’s like to watch someone you love die right in front of you?" The Doctor opened his mouth to protest that yes, as a matter of fact he damned well did know just that, but thought better of it in light of current circumstances. "That’s the fourth time that’s happened to me, by the way, since you and I started traveling together.”
“Four times?”
She ticked them off on her fingers with more force than was strictly necessary. “In 1987 my dad got hit by a car twice and you were eaten by reapers that afternoon, and then you died again last night.”
“Ah.”
“Yes. ‘Ah’. Again. And don’t think we’re not going to talk about my dad and parallel universes.”
“Well, now, that’s not really my fault.”
“Right now, everything is your fault. Chernobyl is your fault. The Fall of the Roman Empire is your fault. Waterloo is your fault. And you’re a Time Lord; they all very well could be, for all I know! You certainly never would have told me if they were!”
He ignored her. “I have so much explaining to do, Rose, and you have every right to be angry at me, but it would be lovely if you could calm down enough for me to allow me to do that.”
“Calm down? You want me to calm down?”
“Bollocks,” he muttered to himself, rubbing his hands over his face then grinding the heels of his hands into his eyes in self-directed frustration. Nice one, Doctor. Tell an angry, hormonal woman to calm down. Bloody brilliant, you are.
Instead, he took a deep breath and said, “You’ve been through hell in the last seventeen hours, Rose. Well, it’s actually only been sixteen hours and 42 minutes since your mother told us about the ghosts, but if we round up to the nearest hour for simplicity’s sa-”
“There’s nothing simple about this!”
“Er, right. Yes. Seems I’ve got quite a gob in this new body.”
“What else is different?” She sounded heated but curious.
“Apart from the obvious, you mean?”
“Yes. Apart from the fact that you look like one of the pretty boys you always hated so much, I mean.”
The Doctor cringed, then sighed. He’d rather be ‘pretty’ than some of the alternatives, he supposed. He could have come out looking like a silurian, or a slitheen, or worse. Besides, hadn’t he always envied the pretty boys that flitted around his Rose like gnats? At least it sounded like he wasn’t old and grey this time, he supposed. There were no liver spots on his hands or anything.
Still, he really had hated those pretty boys, and now being counted amongst their number was a bit...off-putting. But he couldn’t hate himself for the crime of being good-looking, could he? Of course he couldn’t.
The Doctor wondered if his personality would match his looks. He certainly hoped so. Oh, yes, he should dress the part this time. No more sullen brooding and dark clothes. He should try to be a bit more dapper this go-round. ...Although maybe not a cravat and velvet coat. And not a dandy, like his third body. And no celery pinned to his lapel. He shuddered. What had he been thinking?
He’d always hated the nose and ears he ended up with last time, especially after he saw Rose giving more than a glance to the handsome blokes they came across in their travels. The Doctor had known she loved him and found him attractive later, but he hadn’t known that in the beginning and always suspected that she’d probably grown to see him that way. She probably hadn’t thought him fit when she’d first laid eyes on him. He hadn't asked. To tell the truth, he didn't want to know.
Maybe Rose would find him more attractive now, right off the bat? Maybe she’d like him better than she had in his last body?
Nah, he thought. S’impossible. Rose had loved him just the way he was. Ears, nose and all. At best, she’d love them the same. Only different. Even if this body was terribly handsome, and she'd called him pretty. It was a start.
Blimey. This body had a gob even when it wasn’t speaking out loud. And it was vain to boot.
Giving himself a little mental shake, he went back to answering Rose’s question. He regretted his next words mightily, even though they hadn’t yet been said.
“The core of me is the same. My soul never changes; I’m always the Doctor, the same man you fell in love with. That’s what you see through our bond, that’s what you saw just now. My spirit, my soul, my essence; whatever you want to call it, that’s what you saw. That’s me, and that never changes. But there will more than likely be some personality differences that you’ll notice.”
“Like what?”
“I don’t know just yet. It’s all untested. I’ve had lots of different traits and skills in the past. It's a lottery, really. Will I be funny? Bookish? Sarcastic? Geeky? Broody? Sexy?”
The Doctor winked and clicked his tongue at her. She ducked her head and blushed a bit, and he grinned at the response from her that indicated attraction. Good. Was always a good thing for your wife to find you fit.
He went on, just a wee bit smug. “I’m sure I’ll be brilliant - I’m always brilliant. And every Time Lord has their telepathy, their Time Sense and is brilliant at astronomy. But as to the rest, I’ve no idea yet.
“Will I be a brilliant at sports? A footballer? Had one incarnation that was quite the cricket player. Maybe this body will care to watch footie with Mickey, who knows. Maybe I’ll be musical, or fashionable. Maybe I’ll be a good cook. One body was a bit Byronic.” She looked at him curiously and he explained. “Poetic. Romantic. I’ve had bodies that were fuddy-duddies and some that were adventurers. My last body was a tinkerer. Who knows what I’ll be like this time? I’ve not even seen myself yet. I could have another daft face, for all I know.”
“You seem a bit vain.”
“Was just thinking that m’self, actually.”
“You talk as if you’ve done this quite a few times before.”
“I have. This is my tenth body.”
“You’ve done this ten times before now, and you didn’t see fit to tell me?”
“That body was brand new, Rose! Barely over two years old! I had only been in that body ninety-nine days when I met you, and when we started traveling together, it was only four months old, on the nose. I had every reason to think that I had decades - centuries even - left in that body!”
“And in all those bodies, you retain the same soul?”
“Yes. The same thoughts and memories, but a different body and slightly different personality.”
Rose pondered him. “So I know you, but I don’t know you.”
“No. You know me, Rose. You know me better than anyone, I’m just a bit different. Only a bit. An eensy amount. Tiny little dash of ‘different’. May even be hardly noticeable.”
Rose looked him up and down. “No, it’s plenty noticeable. You look nothing like him. And you sound rather different as well.”
“I can hear that.”
“You don’t sound like you’re from the north anymore. You sound...posh.”
“Is that so terrible?” His voice was soft, and even he can hear the vulnerability there.
Her voice was equally quiet. “I don’t know. I loved your accent.”
Hurt stabbed at him, and he tried to swallow it. “I can’t change back. If I could do that for you, I would. But I can’t.”
Rose just nodded, not looking at him.
“I love you, Rose.”
“I know.”
She didn’t say it back, he thought, morose. He comforted himself with the fact that he’d just felt her love a few moments before, but a niggling little voice wondered if she’d really be able to love the new him.
He chastised himself as soon as the thought surfaced. Of course she would, he’d felt her love when they were connected a few moments ago. She’d love him again. She just needed time. But just then, a he felt a rolling in his chest and opened his mouth, releasing a little cloud of regeneration energy.
Right now, he had other things that required his attention.
“I have to sleep some more, Rose. I woke up too soon.”
“Okay.”
“Will you...will you stay with me?”
Her eyes widened, and he hastened to reassure her. “You don’t have to sleep with me. I want to give you all the time you need to get accustomed to this body. But...well...I’ve found since Kyoto that I can’t sleep unless you’re nearby. I need to sleep at least two more hours to finish flushing out the excess regeneration energy. Possibly three. Besides that, you’ve had a hell of a time over the last seventeen hours, yourself, and you need rest.”
“I’m fine.”
“Please, Rose. Please rest...not for me. For Mop - for the girls.”
After a moment, she nodded.
His voice was hesitant, tentative. “You’ll...will you stay?”
She regarded him carefully, then nodded again. “Alright, yeah. I need to think about things, anyway. I’ll go over there,” she pointed to the couch, “and try to kip.”
“No, no. You take the bed. I’ll sleep on the couch.”
“Alright.” She agreed quickly and the Doctor had the urge to tease her for half a second, before he thought better of it.
Neither moved for a few moments, then Rose fixed him with a glare. “When you wake up, you and I are going to have a talk about Jack.”
“Er, yes. I’ll tell you what happened…”
“I know what happened,” she snapped. “I want to know why you never told me what happened.”
“In that case, we can talk about it now, there's very little to say. I didn’t want you to feel upset or guilty. I didn’t want to hurt you with the knowledge. That’s the only answer I can give you. I'm sorry.”
“Well, I’m hurt and upset now, so you failed spectacularly in that regard.”
The Doctor just nodded and felt another swell of exhaustion. “Rose, I’m going to fall asleep soon. When I wake up, we’ll talk more. Just...just know that I love you, alright? That hasn’t changed, could never change.”
Rose just nodded, and he bobbed his head forward as if to kiss her before he thought better of it and drew back.
“Please rest, Rose. You have to be knackered, and I can’t imagine what effect this is having on- on the girls.” Rose just nodded and he indicated her belly. “May I?”
She hesitated. “I don’t...can it wait until you wake up?”
He felt a dull, rolling pain in a chest that had nothing to do with his regeneration. “Right, yes. Of course.”
She watched him with a speculative look, then shook her head a tiny bit. Going over to the bed, she pulled off a pillow and the quilt at the foot of the bed and brought it back, offering it to him.
“Yes. Brilliant. Molto bene.”
Rose looked at him, confused, and he kicked himself. “What?”
“Nothing. We’ll talk when I wake up, yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“I love you.”
Rose just made a little humming sound, but he took it as a sound of assent. “Sleep well.”
“Right. Will do.”
It occurred to him as he spread the blanket out, over his body, that she hadn’t called him ‘Doctor’ at any point in their conversation.
~*~O~*~
The two hours the Doctor said were the bare minimum had passed, and then another hour. He’d not yet stirred. It was half eight now, and she’d not been able to sleep at all. She doubted she would; her whirling thoughts just wouldn’t let her.
Rose closed her eyes and lay back against the head of her bed, her legs sticking out in front of her and her hands resting on the gentle swell of her belly. It’ll all be okay, she told herself. Everything is going to be fine. Just fine. I’ll learn to love this new Doctor, and it’ll all be okay.
But what if it wasn’t? What if she couldn’t love him the way she wanted to? Just how different was he going to be? He’d done this ten times, he said. Who else-
Sarah Jane. Sarah Jane was coming, would be here this morning. She would be the perfect person to talk to about this. The Doctor had said she’d been through this before. Did that mean that she’d seen a regeneration? Did she know what had happened to the Doctor? Would she know what kind of changes to expect? If her Doctor’s body had only been a couple of years old, then Sarah Jane must have known an older version of the Doctor. Maybe she could tell Rose about just how alike and different they had been, and what how much different and similar she could expect this Doctor to be from her Doctor.
Rose had lots of questions. So, so many questions.
She closed her eyes again and took deep breaths, trying to calm the swirling in her brain, hoping to chase even one thread of thought down so she could make sense of it. When that proved futile, she tried to focus on the babies. The anxiety she’d been feeling over the last day was intense, and she was sure it had to be having some sort of effect on the girls - especially considering that they were telepathic. Rose concentrated on sending them all the love in her heart. Quietly, so as not to wake the sleeping Doctor, she sang to her belly, hoping that perhaps she would soothe herself to sleep.
She’d given up on sleep and was simply singing when her phone went off beside her.
[Mum] 23/08/07 - 8:32am: r u awake?
[Rose] 23/08/07 - 8:32am: yeah, I’m awake.
[Mum] 23/08/07 - 8:33am: come down 2 brekkie. i made a fry up
[Rose] 23/08/07 - 8:33am: Can’t right now. Told the Doctor I’d stay with him until he finished sleeping.
[Rose] 23/08/07 - 8:33am: Plus I told him I’d rest since the last day has been hard on the babies
[Mum] 23/08/07 - 8:34am: so that bloke is the doctor?
Rose had no idea how to answer that question. She knew that he was, but her heart didn’t want to believe that her Doctor, her northern Doctor, had gone and wouldn’t be back. There was so much to process, so much to think on. Finally, she decided on an answer:
[Rose] 23/08/07 - 8:36am: I think so, yes
Tears prickled the backs of her eyes, angry at her own easy betrayal of the man she loved. She sent another message.
[Rose] 23/08/07 - 8:37am: Can you come up? I need my mum.
[Mum] 23/08/07 - 8:38am: ill b right there love
[Rose] 23/08/07 - 8:39am: Thanks
She began to hum the lullaby again and stroked circles on her belly, wondering idly if she were accidentally writing anything in Gallifreyan. A soft knock came at the door and she called out, softly.
“Come on in, Mum.”
Jackie peeked her head around the door then came in carrying a couple of muffins and mug of tea. She crossed the room to the bed, and bent to kiss Rose before having a seat. Jackie sat on the bed; Rose scooted her legs a little to the side to give her more room.
“I brought you muffins. Couldn’t find any but banana nut, so that’ll have to do. You need to eat,” she said sternly, and Rose was meek when she took one and peeled the paper from the bottom, not bothering to complain about the crumbs in bed. There was no point in arguing with her mother when she had that look.
Jackie seemed pleased enough, and patted Rose on the knee. “You alright, sweetheart?”
“M’fine, Mum,” Rose said around a mouthful of muffin.
Her mother gave her a searching look, and Rose burst into tears. Her mother took the muffin away without a word, then pulled Rose into her arms and soothed her. “Go on, now; have a good cry, love. Mum’s here. S’alright, now.”
It took several long minutes before Rose was able to get herself together. Her mum pulled a tissue from the box beside her bed and handed it to her. Rose took it and muttered her thanks, wiping her eyes and blowing her nose. Jackie patted her leg and watched her closely.
When Rose seemed acceptably under control her mother asked her, “You feel better now, sweetheart?”
Rose shrugged, sniffling. She didn’t know what she felt, honestly.
“Want to tell me what’s been happening? Where’s himself?”
Rose tilted her head to indicate the couch. “Sleepin’ it off.”
“So that’s really him, then?”
Rose nodded, using a tissue to wipe her nose. “Seems so.”
“Rather fit, ain’t he?”
“Mum!”
“What?”
“You’re impossible.”
Jackie didn’t debate that. She just asked; “You’re sure it’s him?”
Rose pondered for a minute over how to answer that question. Finally: “On the night we got engaged, we started the marriage bond for his people.”
“Is it like human...bonding?” Jackie gave Rose a naughty wink and Rose rolled her eyes. She knew her mum was only trying to cheer her up, but still.
“No, Mum. It’s not like you’re thinking. We bonded telepathically so that if we want to, when we’re touching, we can communicate our feelings to each other. I can feel him and he can feel me. Sometimes, when we’re touching, I can sense his presence. Like, I can almost see what makes him ...him in my mind. His spirit or soul or whatever. I don’t know how to explain it, and it doesn’t happen all the time. Just sometimes.”
“Oh yeah? What times are those?”
“Please, Mum.”
“Oh alright,” she pouted, then patted Rose’s leg again with a wink.
“Thanks ever so,” Rose said, sarcastic. “Anyway, like I said, I can sense him in my mind when we’re touching, sometimes. When he woke up a couple of hours ago, he took my hand and we connected. It was the same thing I felt before all this happened. It’s still him.”
“But he looks so different.”
“I know, and he says he’ll likely act different, too. I just don’t know what to make of all of it.”
“Why’s he still sleeping?”
“Said he had to sleep off the effects of the regeneration or something. I don’t know what that means, but he looked knackered.”
Just then, another knock sounded at the door and Jack poked his head in. “Sarah Jane is here, she was wondering if she could come in.”
“Yeah, of course she can. Been wanting to talk to her.”
Jack crossed the room and bent to kiss Rose’s head. “I”ll get her. You feeling alright?”
“Yeah, M’fine, Jack.”
He looked at her carefully. “You will be,” he said, sounding certain. He tipped her chin up at him. “You know, Sarah Jane has been through this before. She was with the Doctor during a regeneration once.”
“Really? I was wondering if she had been.”
“She has been. Might be a good idea to talk to her.”
“Yeah, you’re right, Jack. Bring her in. Quiet, though, he’s sleeping.” Rose adjusted herself on the bed, taking another quick bite from the muffin on the table under her mother’s stern gaze. Jack crossed the room and opened the door, motioning to someone outside, then came back in with Sarah Jane in tow. The older woman bent and hugged Rose, putting her hand over Rose’s bump.
“You’re getting bigger!” Sarah Jane said, smiling.
Rose laughed on a breath. “Tell me about it. Got a good ways to go, yet, too. Here,” she indicated the chair by the bed. “Have a seat. Jack, you too.”
“Nah, Rosie. You have a little bit of girls’ time. I’ll be in to check on you later.” He bent over and kissed the top of her head again.
“Ta, Jack,” she smiled at him as he left the room.
“So!” Sarah Jane said, turning back to Rose. “Jack told me what happened.”
“The Doctor regenerated.”
“So I heard.”
“What’s that even mean, ‘regenerated’?” Jackie asked.
Rose opened her mouth to answer, but Sarah Jane beat her to the punch. “When a Time Lord is facing death, he has this thing he can do. Every cell in the body that’s dying rewrites itself, and he becomes a new man.”
Jackie tilted her head towards the couch the Doctor was sleeping on. “So he’s a new man? Rose was just telling me he was the same, just looked different.”
“I didn’t say he was the same. That’s not exactly what I said,” she contradicted her mother, earning a furrowed brow. Then she turned to Sarah Jane. “You’ve been with the Doctor during a regeneration, yeah?” Rose asked.
Sarah Jane nodded. “I traveled with his third incarnation, and was with him when he regenerated into the fourth.” She leaned forward and covered Rose’s hand with her own. “Jack told me you didn’t know he could regenerate. I can’t imagine how you must have felt, seeing that.”
Rose felt the tears well again and just nodded, then asked. “So is he really the same?”
“In all of the important ways, he is. I never knew the first or second incarnations of the Doctor, so I don’t know much about what they were like. My first Doctor was the third. He was a headstrong fellow. Almost seemed to like bickering with authority, he did. The next Doctor, the fourth, oh he was a character. Wore the most ridiculous scarf!”
“You mentioned that scarf,” Rose smiled a little. She had always pictured her leather Doctor wearing a silly scarf any time she remembered that conversation. It had always seemed so ridiculous to her, her stuffy old Doctor doing something so whimsical as wearing a long, striped scarf. It had never occurred to her that he might be a completely different man.
“Well, it’s very worth mentioning!” Sarah Jane laughed. “He was much more laid-back. Loved jelly babies and offered them to everyone he met, it seemed. My first Doctor lived on Earth rather happily. He’d been exiled by the Time Lords for not minding his own business and breaking their law of non-interference, but even when they lifted his exile, he chose to stick around Earth for the most part. But my second Doctor wasn’t like that. He had itchy feet, always liked to be on the go! He was quite funny, too. Loved to explore, that one did.”
Rose began to cry. “The Doctor - my first Doctor I suppose - was only too happy to settle down on Earth for a while. What if this one has the...has ‘itchy feet’, as you said? My Doctor complained about domestics all the time, but then he decided he loved them. What if this Doctor doesn’t? What if he doesn’t want me or these girls? What if he leaves us?”
Sarah Jane stood up and walked to Rose, sitting on the bed beside her and gathering her into her arms.
“I don’t know this Doctor. Haven’t even laid eyes on him yet. But I can promise you this, Rose Tyler. That man loves you to distraction and will never leave your side. I saw that when we first met. That kind of emotional attachment is something that’s...it’s...” Sarah Jane seemed to struggle; possibly to find the words, or maybe against her own emotions. Finally, she spoke again. “Those kinds of connections are almost impossible to derail. They’re soul-to-soul, and they’ll not be broken by something so trivial as a new body. Even if he is a wanderer in this body, he’s going to be drawn to you like a magnet to steel. Where you are, he’ll follow - and happily. Simply because you’re there.”
Rose sat back from Sarah Jane and wiped her eyes. “I just don’t know, Sarah Jane. What if he’s different? This time, I mean. What if he’s different from all the other regenerations before? What if something went wrong this time and he can’t love us like he last one did?”
“Oh, stop it,” Jackie said in exasperation. Rose blinked up at her, stunned out of her tears.
“What?”
“Stop it with the wallowing, Rose. Told you himself he’d be the same no matter what he looked like, din’t he? Standing right in my lounge, he did. Heard him myself. You heard ‘im, too. I love you, but you’ve got to get your head out of your arse, sweetheart! Everyone’s tellin’ you the same bloody thing, Rose! He’s told you he’s the same man. Jack’s told you he’s the same man. Sarah Jane’s told you he’s the same man. Martha’s told you he’s still a Time Lord. And then as if that weren’t enough, you told me yourself you felt him through that bond thingy! So what’s the bleedin’ problem?” Jackie wagged her finger at Rose. “You lost the key, but that don’t mean you have to throw away the whole bleedin’ house! D’ya get me? You’re borrowin’ trouble, you are. Why the hell’d’ya wanna do that for?”
“Leave her be, Jacks,” came a calm, estuary accent. “She’s had a rough night.”
“Doctor?” Jackie and Sarah Jane said, together.
Rose turned to see the man who’d been left in her husband’s clothes when the fires died, now wearing her husband’s pajamas and defending her to her mother. “Yes, it’s me. Jackie, Rose has had several extreme mental and emotional shocks over the last twenty hours or so. I think we can all agree to give her a bit of a break if she seems a bit disoriented and shaken up, can’t we? It’s certainly understandable, given the circumstances.”
“Blimey,” Jackie marveled. “It sounds just like you, but more polite.”
“Ah, well,” he said, cheerful, “said there’d be differences, didn’t I?”
“Hello, Doctor,” Sarah Jane said with a smile.
“Sarah Jane!” he replied, happily. “So lovely to see you! Thanks for coming. Sorry to receive you in my jimjams - looks as if they’re a bit big now. Blimey, I’m not even in my dressing gown. I’m terribly indecent, it seems. Sorry I’m not properly dressed, as it were. Hope you can forgive me the impropriety, ladies,” he included Jackie in the little nod he gave Sarah Jane. “Regeneration and all that. How was the drive down?”
“Lovely, Doctor. You’re looking well for so soon after a regeneration.”
“Am I? Haven’t seen myself yet. Rose tells me I look rather… brown.”
“She’s not wrong,” Sarah Jane smiled.
“Indeed.”
Rose just watched the Doctor interact with the two older women with fascination. He seemed so very different.
He caught her looking at him and tugged his ear. “Jackie? Sarah Jane? Do you think I might be able to speak with Rose for a few minutes? Alone?”
Jackie looked to Rose for her approval of this idea, and Rose nodded subtly. Her mother came over and kissed her cheek. “You come down to the kitchen and eat as soon as you’re done, love. You need to keep up your strength.”
“I will, Mum.”
“Oi. You,” she pointed at the Doctor. “You send her down as soon as you’re done talking. She needs to eat. You do, too, mister, I know you haven’t eaten since tea at my flat yesterday, you must be starving! And the last day hasn’t exactly been a picnic in Hyde Park for you either! So don’t think you’re getting out of brekkie. You can come down after you’re decent,” she said, giving him a quick up-and-down look, then a pat on his cheek before pointing at the tip of his nose. “And don’t go upsettin’ her again! You hear me?”
“Won’t be long, Jacks. Promise.”
She gave him her most intimidating glare in response to his winning smile for a couple of moments, then left the room with Sarah Jane.
“So,” the Doctor started, rocking back and forth on his heels.
“Sleep well?” Rose asked.
“Oh! Yes. Lovely. Quite a comfortable sofa, that is.”
Rose just nodded, looking anywhere but at him.
The Doctor cleared his throat. “So, ah, Rose. I need to be getting dressed...can’t wear jimjams forever! Not that they’re not nice pajamas, they’re quite comfy. It’s just that I’m not exactly Arthur Dent, although he was quite a nice man…”
He stopped when he saw that she was staring at him and reached up to scratch at the back of his neck. She wondered if that was something she was going to be seeing him do a lot - she’d already seen him doing it a couple of times.
“Anyway, I was wondering...typically, when I regenerate, I pick out some clothes that appeal to me at that time. Just whatever I see, I never know what it’ll be. But, if you want, if it’ll make you feel more comfortable, I can keep wearing the jumpers and leather coat -”
She shook her head. “No. That’s not who you are anymore. You should dress in what makes you comfortable - you wouldn’t feel right pretending to be someone you’re ...not anymore.” She bit the inside of her lip to try to fight off the tears that sprung up when she spoke the last bit of that sentence.
He just gaped at her for a second, then seemed to shake himself from his reverie. “Right, yes, very good. I’ll just, um, I’ll pop into the TARDIS and find some kit, and then maybe...maybe I’ll come down and join you for breakfast. Yeah?”
“Yeah, sounds good.”
Rose ducked her head and made to leave, but the Doctor put his hand out to stop her, saying her name gently.
“Yeah?”
“Can I...blimey, this feels awkward...I’d like to spend some time with you later, if I can.”
Rose looked at him carefully, staring into his eyes. She knew her Doctor was in there, but she couldn’t help but try to seek out the familiar in this new man.
“I imagine we’ll be seeing quite a lot of each other, since we both live here.”
“Yes, of course. You’re exactly right,” he said, sounding cheerful but looking rather deflated.
She gestured to the door. “I’ll just go so you can…”
“Rose?”
“Yeah?”
“Can I speak to the babies?”
She could deny him. She could say no, cover her belly and tell him that he could communicate with the babies when she trusted him again and not a moment before.
But there was no way to build trust without little moments like these. She knew who he was, even if he had changed. Rose wondered if the babies would sense the change, too.
There was only one way to find out, and it would happen sooner or later.
Maybe it would ease her worried mind to know now.
“Alright then,” she said, her voice tentative, almost a warning.
His face was like the sun slipping out from behind a cloud. “Brilliant! Excellent! Molto bene!”
Rose wondered at ‘molto bene’ - he’d said that before, too, but she didn’t have time to think on it. He bounced a bit and bent at the waist, his smiling face coming incredibly close to her bump, his long-fingered hands resting lightly on either side of her belly.
“Hello, my sweet girls,” he murmured right next to her shirt - the jumper that used to be his. At once the babies stirred within her, although she doubted he could feel it just yet. “Hello, my brilliant babies. It’s Daddy. I know I sound a bit different, but -”
The babies were ramping up their rolling and kicking, as active as they had ever been when he spoke to them - if not more. Fat tears blurred Rose’s vision as she looked down on his tousled head, looking back up at her in wonder.
“They remember me.”
She didn’t say anything, wasn’t able to. He didn’t ask her to. He simply bent back to her belly, gave it a soft kiss and whispered, “Daddy loves you. Daddy loves you both so much.”
She wasn’t familiar enough with his new voice to be sure, but she thought it sounded thick with unshed tears.
Notes:
Wow, guys. The last chapter got a huge response. Thank you so, so much. Quite overwhelming for rice. ;)
This was a long one, folks. Thanks for sticking with it.
I need to retcon myself a little bit, here. I need to ask you guys to assume that the Doctor and Rose can shut off their emotions when they touch, and that the Doctor taught Rose how to do it, even though I didn't explicitly say that he'd done so. That was my fault: I intended to, but forgot to do so (and I forget just now exactly what, if anything, I did say on the subject, I just know I didn't cover what I meant to). Sorry about that.
Chapter 26: Getting Back to Good
Summary:
Things start to look up for the Doctor.
Chapter Text
The Doctor had a definite spring in his step when he opened the unlocked doors to the TARDIS and strolled onto his frankly magnificent ship. He had every reason to be excited in his own, completely unbiased opinion. His daughters had recognized him at once when he’d put his hands on Rose’s belly and spoken to them, despite the change in his voice and accent. They’d sensed he was the same and been pleased to hear from him. That fact, in and of itself, was enough to send him over the moon with joy.
Rose knew that he was still the Doctor, although she was (understandably) unnerved by the changes in him. Still, he had felt her love when they connected through their bond and he was confident that, in time, he could earn her devotion to this version of him, as well. It would take work, but he was sure that he was up to the challenge. More than.
Oh, blimey, was this new body cocky, too?
All was not right in his world... Not yet. But things were far better than he had any right to have expected or hoped for. Yes indeedy.
He cringed a bit. Oh, that was terrible. He should endeavor to never say ‘yes indeedy’ ever again.
The TARDIS flashed its lights in a running pattern, up and down the console, in a happy greeting.
“Hello yourself, Old Girl! How have you been while I was sleeping? And what do you think?” He gave a little twirl, arms out, showing her his new, pajama-clad body. She flashed her lights again. “Oooh, fit this time, am I? You sayin’ I wasn’t handsome before?” He laughed at the blown raspberry at the back of his mind. “I know, girl. Only teasing. You adore me no matter how I look, eh?” A roll of the eyes at the back of his mind, and he threw a cheeky grin at the console.
“Doctor? That you?”
“Pete! Pete, my good man!” the Doctor called out, stepping towards the corridor and the source of the voice he heard. Pete appeared at the entrance to the console room.
“Blimey,” Pete said. “This is some ship you have here, Doctor.”
“Best ship in the universe,” the Doctor bragged, patting a strut. “Was she kind to you while I was away?”
“Very,” Pete nodded. “She provided us with comfortable rooms and en suites, there were clothes laid out for us in our sizes and styles, and this morning when we awoke the kitchen was directly across the hall.”
“Galley,” the Doctor corrected automatically.
“Sorry?”
“We’re on a ship. It’s called the galley.”
“Ah,” Pete agreed, then changed the subject. “You get everything sorted with Rose?”
“Er, not totally, no. Still a bit tense, there. But we’re on the right track, I think.”
“Good, good. She seems like a nice person.”
“The absolute best,” the Doctor agreed, proud.
“You’re expecting twins, I believe she said?”
“Yes, twin girls. Late this winter, possibly early spring.”
“She looked a bit farther along than that.”
“Yes, well, Time Lord gestation is a bit longer. She's actually a tad small for twenty-four weeks, were this a totally human gestation with twins.”
The Doctor just stood there for a moment looking at Pete as if he expected the other man to say or do something, then remembered that he was actually the host in the situation at hand. “Oh! Sorry! I’ve been instructed by my wife to ask you to join us for breakfast in the house, and to offer you houseroom as long as you care to stay. Took a shine to the two of you, Rose did. Of course, if you would prefer to stay on the TARDIS, you’re welcome to. You’d be welcome to come and go as you please from it, as well as from Smithwood, of course. May move the TARDIS to the yard or the library, though. Wouldn’t do to have you walk into mine and Rose’s bedroom in the middle of the night, y’know, seeing as she’s kind of your daughter. But not really, though, come to think -”
Pete coughed, and the Doctor caught himself, tugging his ear. “Er, yes. Rose has been telling me for as long as she’s known me that I’m terribly rude. I’d hoped that had changed with this new body, but apparently not. And it seems to be compounded by the fact that I’ve got quite a blabbermouth this time. Isn’t that always the way? I’ve no idea what I’m going to do...blimey. I’ve got to learn to get a grip on this gob of mine, don’t I?”
Pete chuckled and clapped his hand on the Doctor’s shoulder. “Seems you have some adjusting to do.”
“Quite right, too.”
“If you and Rose are sure that we won’t be inconveniencing the two of you, we’d be delighted to stay in your home until we can find more appropriate accommodations.”
“No inconvenience at all, it’s our pleasure. Might get a bit loud when the babies arrive, of course.”
“I imagine so, but I suspect we’ll be long gone by the time that happens.”
“If you’ll excuse me, Pete, I’d quite like to shower and get myself dressed in something other than pajamas. May take a bit, this first time picking out clothes. Shall I meet you back here in say, an hour and a half? Then we’ll join the ladies out in the house.”
“Ladies?”
“Well,” the Doctor tugged his ear again. “I say ‘ladies’, but it’s a mixed lot. Quite the gathering, really. There’s Rose, of course, and Jack. You met him yesterday. The three of us travel together. We just settled down here, at my Earth-bound home a few weeks ago to wait for the babies. We’ll head back out to the stars once the girls arrive and are old enough, and there’ll be five of us then! There’s also Sarah Jane out there, an old friend who used to travel with me years ago. And Martha, Rose’s friend and OB/GYN. She’s brilliant. There's Mickey, he’s Rose’s mate since childhood. He’s an idiot, but I’ve tried to quit calling him that since it earns me dirty looks from m’wife when I do. And,” he looked sheepish and his voice was a bit more quiet, “my mother-in-law is out there, as well.”
“Jackie?”
“Yes.”
“I’m not sure I want to see Jackie.”
The Doctor sighed a bit. “If you’re going to live in this world, Pete, you’re going to have to. It’s inevitable. At some point, you’ll have to see her.”
Pete pinched the bridge of his nose and let out a sigh. “Right. You’re right, of course you are. Okay, then, I’ll meet her when we go out there in a bit.”
“Brilliant! I’ll just shower and get dressed and we’ll head out when I’m ready, then?”
“Alright,” Pete agreed.
“Meet you back here in ninety minutes?”
“Ninety minutes,” Pete nodded.
After Pete left, the Doctor moved toward the jump seat where Jack had left his old clothes in a pile for him to find. Rooting around in the jacket pocket, he pulled out his phone and sonic. He scooped up the clothes in one arm and started texting with the other, walking towards his and Rose’s room.
[Doctor] 23/08/07 - 9:43am: have you told your mum about Pete?
[Rose] 23/08/07 - 9:43am: I’ve been putting it off. do I need to tell her now?
[Doctor] 23/08/07 - 9:44am: he accepted the invitation to stay in the house
[Doctor] 23/08/07 - 9:44am: we’ll be out there in an hour and a half
[Rose] 23/08/07 - 9:45am: I’ll talk to her now
[Rose] 23/08/07 - 9:45am: thanks
[Doctor] 23/08/07 - 9:46am: you’re welcome. see you soon.
The Doctor arrived at his and Rose’s room, setting his clothes on the bed, and went into the en suite.
Finally, finally, he was going to get a look at himself.
Taking a deep breath, he closed his eyes tight, stepped in front of the mirror and turned towards it. He opened one eye and, finding no slitheen staring back at him, opened the other.
Not too shabby. Not bad at all, really. Actually, if he were being honest, he was more than a bit good-looking, and this face was rather a boon, he thought.
He leaned forward, jutting his chin out, then baring his teeth. Well those were quite nice. His nose was much smaller this time, as were his ears. And oh, his hair was thick. Thickety-thick-thick. He ran his fingers through it, and it would feel just gorgeous if Rose did that. Maybe eventually he could talk her into it.
He took off his shirt and gave his chest an appraising look. Hmm. Skinny. Proper skinny. He’d never quite been this skinny, but he wasn’t scrawny. There was muscle tone there, and a smattering of chest hair. He just wasn’t as athletic as he was last time. Hopefully that wouldn’t be a problem.
He had a thought and felt a thrill of alarm. Tucking his thumb into the waistband of his pajama pants, he pulled them away from his body, then looked down. He felt relief and a smug sense of satisfaction. Rose would find no complaint there, at least. Impressive.
She’d be less impressed, however, if he didn’t get himself smelling a bit less manky. Time for a bath.
The Doctor undressed and opened the door to the shower.
~*~O~*~
Rose chewed thoughtfully on a strip of bacon. The morning had been eventful in multiple ways, and many of them didn’t include the Doctor. She’d been amused to see the interplay between the parties sitting in her kitchen when she came downstairs.
Her mum and Sarah Jane, who had only met a couple of hours before and seemed, to her mind, to be completely different women, were bantering like old friends. They’d cooked breakfast together and were both alternately swatting at Jack, who’d made an utter nuisance of himself, much to both women’s delight. They had both threatened him with a spatula or wooden spoon multiple times. He had simply snitched food and given them a cheeky, unrepentant grin that had melted both women’s complaints into nothing.
But as fun as those interactions were to watch, the little exchanges between Mickey and Martha were much more intriguing. The two were trading furtive glances and shy smiles, hands brushing and lips being bitten. Rose was astounded she hadn’t thought of making this match sooner, herself. The Doctor would be thrilled with this development.
Or maybe this one wouldn’t.
She sighed to herself. She had no idea what to feel about all of this. There was no doubt in her mind now that he was who he said he was. He was the Doctor. But he wasn’t her Doctor. He was entirely new... yet not entirely. He was her husband, yet he was different. Her husband had died, yet he was still her husband. Her bondmate.
It was all terribly confusing. The only thing that she knew for sure was that he was the Doctor, but she didn’t know him.
She was broken from her reverie by her phone going off, and a message from the man in question. They’d be down in ten minutes, he said. She still hadn’t told her mother. Shit. She tapped out a reply.
“Oi!” Her mother called her down and brought over the frying pan, dumping more bacon on her plate. “What have I told you about piddling with that phone at the table?”
“M'not piddling. M'n adult you know, Mum. This is my house you’re in.”
Jackie pointed the spatula at Rose and leveled a look at her. “I don’t care how old you are, little madam. I’m still your mother and I’ll always be. Now put that phone down and eat.”
Rose put the phone down, but not because her mother told her to. Most decidedly not because of that, or the narrowed eyes, or the pointed spatula. None of those factored into her decision to put her phone down and eat. Not at all.
“Can’t believe you’re serving me this kind of food in front of Martha, Mum.”
“Martha won’t say nothin’ if she knows what’s good for her,” Jackie sniped, good naturedly, and gave Martha a wink.
“Not me,” Martha agreed. “See no evil, speak no evil.”
“Good girl,” Jackie said.
“The one you really need to worry about is the Doctor,” Jack said. “Best not let him see you feeding her all that greasy food, Jacks,” he said, reclining back in his chair and tilting his head back into his hands. “He gets a little ridiculous about Rose eating the good stuff.”
Jackie snorted. “I’d like to see himself try to tell me what to do.”
Rose closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She was really dreading what she was about to do...but there was nothing for it. It would be a terrible shock if she didn’t prepare her mum, and she didn’t want that for her.
“Hey, you lot? I need to speak with my mum. Could you leave us to talk for a bit?”
She got a couple of curious looks, but everyone started making the motions to leave, including Jack. Rose reached out and put a hand on his arm, asking him to stay.
When the room had cleared, Jackie looked at at her with a furrowed brow. “Rose? What’s goin’ on?”
“Mum… What do you know about what happened yesterday at Torchwood?”
“Well, there was a - a hole in the wall or summat and these nasty creatures came through, cyborgs and darliks or some such…”
“Cybermen and daleks,” Rose corrected, shooting Jack a look.
“That’s it,” Jackie said, pointing at Rose. “You got it. Cybermen and darlings.”
Rose didn’t bother to correct her. Neither did Jack.
“See, Mum, the thing is that yes, they came through a...a type of hole in the wall. But there was something else on the other side of that hole.”
“What was it, then?”
“It was another Earth,” Jack said.
“Another Earth? How can there be another Earth? In a hole in the wall? Don’t be ridiculous.”
“Ours isn’t the only universe, Mum. There are infinite number of universes out there, all of them slightly different. And this hole in the universe just happened to connect ours with this other one.”
“What’s that got to do with me?”
“Well, see, Jackie, the thing is…”
“Someone from the other universe came through. Two someones, actually.”
“What are you saying, Rose?”
Rose took a deep breath and looked to Jack for strength. He reached over and gave her hand a gentle squeeze before she went on. “There was another Pete Tyler in that universe. He was the director of Torchwood. He tried to come over to warn us about what was about to happen with someone that worked for him, but he got stuck. He’s here, Mum. Pete Tyler is here.”
Jackie’s hand was covering her mouth. “Pete is...he’s here? But he can't be. He's dead. Pete's dead.”
“He’s in the Tardis with the Doctor. He should be down in a minute.”
“He’s your...he’s your dad?”
“No,” Jack said, sensing a delicate subject for Rose, seeking to protect her, as always. “In his universe he was married to Jackie, but she died a couple of years ago. They never had any children.”
“Does he know who you are?” Jackie asked Rose.
“Yes. He and I have talked. He’s a very nice man. He looks just like Dad did, just a bit older.”
“I don’t...I don’t know what to say,” Jackie said, her voice a bit strangled.
“Hullo, Jacks,” Pete said in a muted tone from the doorway to the kitchen. “You look well.”
Jackie turned towards the voice with wide eyes and stared at him for a long moment. “You look alive,” she deadpanned.
Pete chuckled. “The Doctor said you were a firecracker.”
“He’s not wrong,” Jack muttered, and Rose elbowed him.
“Rose? Jack? Let’s step out and give Pete and Jackie a bit of time to get reacquainted,” Rose heard from over Pete’s shoulder. Looking past the man in the doorway she saw the Doctor, obviously dressed, although she couldn’t make out anything other than his head - his hair perfectly styled, sticking up every which way - but in a manner that was anything but random and perfectly suited him.
She and Jack stood and Pete stepped into the kitchen to let them pass. When he did, she saw the Doctor dressed in what he felt comfortable wearing in this body for the first time. He wore a brown pinstriped suit with a pale blue oxford and a brown patterned tie in a fairly loose windsor knot. It was quite a nice look on this man, although it’d have looked rather ridiculous on her first Doctor.
Jack gave the Doctor one of his patented full-body appreciative looks, earning a scowl from the Doctor for his efforts. Jack’s response was, as always, a cheeky grin, and he passed through the door and past the Doctor.
Rose followed him and the Doctor held his hand out as if to help her through, smiling at her brilliantly when she got closer to him and bringing his arm up behind her when she crossed in front of him, although not close enough to touch. Rose turned back once to look at her mum and the new Pete. Jackie was still sitting at the same spot at the table, and her eyes were sparkling with tears. Pete had taken a couple of steps towards her and had rammed his hands into his pockets, his chin ducked to his chest and mouth working soundlessly.
"They'll be alright," the Doctor murmured as she passed him. Rose just nodded.
He fell in step beside her. “So, whatd’ya think?”
Rose feigned ignorance. “About?”
“The new kit!” He turned and walked sideways for a minute so that she could see him, tugging on his lapels. “Not bad, eh? A bit sharp?” She pursed her lips against a smile and he didn’t miss the gesture. He brought two fingers close together, indicating a small amount. “Maybe just a teensy bit sharp?”
“Maybe,” she agreed. He bounced on the balls of his feet when he turned back to walk beside her with a mad grin and she rolled her eyes. “Not much, mind. Just a tiny, little bit.”
“Oh, I know that look, Rose Tyler. You like it.” He rolled the words around in his mouth as if they were delicious, teasing them and her.
“Shut up,” she protested, blushing.
“You do!” he gloated. “Ha!”
“You’re asking for a smack, you are.”
“Fantastic!” he said, and she sobered at once. Her eyes swelled with tears and she bit her lip, turning away.
He seemed to realize what he’d done. “Rose, I -”
“No, it’s fine.”
“I didn’t-”
“Leave it. It’s fine. I’m fine. I should probably go check on Mum and Pete.”
“I don’t think you should. They likely need time. Pete was very nervous about meeting your mother.”
“But she barely had any warning at all! I’m sure she’s in shock-”
“Rose,” he interrupted, his voice a soft entreaty and command at the same time. “Please trust me this time.”
She stared at him for a long moment, then nodded.
“Okay,” he said, a little grateful, all playfulness gone. “I, um, I was going to ask to talk to you this morning, if I could.”
She brushed away the stray tear that had fallen. “Yeah, alright.”
“Should we go into the library? I think everyone else has gone into the lounge.”
“S’fine.”
Rose followed him into the door of the library and went inside. The room was a little unfamiliar to her, as she hadn’t spent much time in it. He’d parked the TARDIS in the far corner, getting it out of their bedroom, she assumed in deference to her privacy. She was grateful.
“We didn’t come here often, I know,” he said, apparently noticing her looking around. “Before, I mean. I thought it may be easier for you. A little less uncomfortable or full of memories.”
It was an incredibly thoughtful gesture. Exactly like something her old Doctor would have done.
“Thank you,” she murmured.
“I was thinking,” he said, “about what to do. About us. Welllll,” he dragged out the word and tugged his ear, and that little tic was definitely going to be something for her to get used to, “more to the point, I was thinking about the situation we find ourselves in and how it affects us. Not just us, but the people around us and the babies. It’s something we need to address, certainly…”
“You were right,” she interrupted. “You do have quite the mouth on you this time.”
He sighed. “I’m hoping I can get it under control sooner rather than later,” he confessed.
“I’m not ready for there to be an ‘us’ just now,” she said in a quiet voice. “I know who you are. I believe you. But I need you to understand that, to me, you were a completely different man less than twenty-four hours ago. And don’t -” she held up a hand to stop him and his open mouth, “- tell me exactly how many hours, minutes and seconds it actually was since you regenerated, please. I don’t need to actually know for my point to stand.”
“But Rose,” he protested, nearly pleaded, “if you know it’s me, if you know I’m the Doctor, then why can’t you be with me?”
“Because while I know your soul, I have no idea what kind of man you are. The man I love died. I need time to grieve that, and to learn just what kind of man you are.”
“Are you willing to do that?”
“Yes. But not all at once. I’m more than a bit broken right now; I need time to heal.”
The Doctor was quiet for a few minutes, looking at his Converse-clad feet, then raised his head in something like excitement. “I’ve an idea. May seem a bit daft, but hear me out.”
She narrowed her eyes at him with a hint of a smile. “I’m rather used to daft ideas from you by now, so by all means, go right ahead.”
“We start over from the beginning and do things just as we did the first time.”
“I have no intention to go back to being a shop girl.”
“Cheeky. No, I mean after we started traveling. The way we fell in love. Remember? After Van Staten? The TARDIS led you to my workshop? We spent every evening after that together...we’d have these mad adventures together during the day and then in the evenings we’d spend time together eating dinner, watching telly, stargazing, reading in the library...something. Anything. Just being together. And eventually we fell in love.”
“So, are you asking to date me? On the TARDIS?”
“Sort of, yeah. Just without the mad adventures, owing to the babies. And it doesn't have to be the TARDIS. We’ll still go out if you like, but we’ll mostly stay within our own home, but we can go on the TARDIS if you want. What do you think?”
“Where will you sleep?”
“I don’t sleep, remember? And if I need to kip, I’ll kip on the TARDIS, in our old room.”
“You said you can’t sleep if I’m not around.”
“I’ll make do.” When she shot him a skeptical look, he added, “I’ll not force my company on you, Rose. I’m only asking for time with you. If you say no, I’ll respect that. I’ll more than likely pout, but I’ll respect it.”
Rose fought down the quirk at the corner of her mouth brought on by his little burst of self-awareness, but he saw it anyway and hope flickered in his eyes. She pondered for a moment. “You understand that you are, in many ways, a stranger to me.”
“I do.”
“And I may take a good, long while to warm to you.”
“Yes.”
“And that, even though you’re my husband, I may keep you in the ‘friend zone’ for quite a while, if not indefinitely?”
“As long as you don’t do it out of spite, to punish me for not telling you about regeneration. Please don’t hold your love over my head, Rose. And don’t keep me from the babies. That’s all I ask.”
“Fair enough.”
“So you’ll date me, then?”
His voice was so hopeful, she almost laughed.
“Oh, go on then. Yes, I’ll date you.”
She actually did laugh when he whooped for joy.
Notes:
The worst is over, but we're not out of the woods yet.
Chapter 27: The Waiting Game
Summary:
The Doctor deals with his houseguests and discovers a bit about Rose's past that has some bearing on their present.
Notes:
But I swear here and now, the truth shall be mine.
You'll surrender to my love, my weapon is time.
And your wall of resistance, I will slowly undermine,
While your uncontrolled fixation grows stronger with time.
I'll play your waiting game, I'm gonna win the waiting game.
I'll play your waiting game, I'm gonna win this game my friend,
And I'll be with you again.
~TR*tw for this chapter - discussion of Rose's past with an abusive ex.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
The Doctor had long ago grown accustomed to Jack Harkness hanging around, interfering in his domestics. The self-proclaimed Captain had been making himself at home in the Doctor’s space since before there was ever (officially) anything for him to interfere with.
So the idea of Jack loitering around while he set about wooing his wife again wasn’t all that daunting to the Doctor. In fact, Jack had been a stalwart supporter of he and Rose coming together in the first place. The Doctor was confident that his friend felt no different this time.
What was intimidating and discouraging, however, (what was downright terrifying when you got right down to it,) was trying to start all over pursuing the hand of his wife with her mother, her ex-boyfriend, her alternate-universe-dad and her alternate-universe-dad’s-mate-from-work in residence. Not to mention the occasional visit from Sarah Jane Smith and Martha Jones.
The Doctor had expected Pete and Jake to stay. He’d invited them to stay. When Rose had suggested it, he’d welcomed the idea. He’d have welcomed any idea she had at that time, of course, but that was beside the point. They both seemed like a good sort, and were essentially homeless now. Besides, there was the bizarre, otherworldly family connection to take into consideration. He knew that Rose would feel responsible for Pete based on that, and he felt a bit responsible based on trapping the two men in his world - whether it was his actually his fault or not - so it was the least he could do, really.
He hadn’t banked on Jackie wanting to stay with them for nigh on a week, although in hindsight he should have. He was virtually a stranger to her, and the Doctor tried to understand. If he were honest with himself, he couldn’t blame Jackie for her protectiveness over Rose, and even appreciated it. It was odd, though, because he sensed no real change in the woman’s attitude towards him, except for a marked increase in appreciative glances in his direction (which made him shudder). She seemed to accept that he was the Doctor, that he was still her son-in-law. Yet she stayed for days.
He suspected ulterior motives on his mother-in-law’s part, though, particularly after he heard Rose screaming on the fourth day after his regeneration. He came running full-speed, fearing the worst, only to find Rose with her hands over her eyes, nearly shrieking, ‘Are you decent yet?!’ The Doctor looked at her as if she were daft until he turned and saw Pete and Jackie on the couch, looking very sheepish and adjusting their shirts. The Doctor had laughed uproariously. Rose had swatted him, her face red. He tried to be sorry for laughing, he really did, but he just couldn’t.
He’d also been giving a healthy dose of side-eye to the local Idiot, who’d taken up residence in his home of late...even if he wasn’t allowed to call him that anymore, nor was he allowed to kick Mickey out on his arse. He’d figured (and hoped) that Mickey would go back to his home and job, not stick around like a burr. Yet the proverbial and perennial thorn in his side was doing just that. The Doctor was most annoyed with Mickey out of all of his houseguests, since it seemed that the Idiot refused to leave Rose’s side and actually seemed intent on keeping the Doctor away from her, despite not really seeming to question who he was.
The sheer nerve!
Anytime the Doctor sought out time with Rose, Mickey would either appear from nowhere or suggest a reason why he needed her attention immediately, and he’d be left without opportunity to spend time with her. It was maddening, and the Doctor had half a good mind to give the young man a piece of his unfathomable and magnificent mind before throwing him out of his and Rose’s home. That would do nothing to endear him to Rose, however, so he did no more than complain to Jack about it in his library.
“How in the bloody hell am I supposed to get back into her good graces if I can’t get her entire bloody family out of my house? I want them to get the fuck out, Jack. Out. Mickey, Jackie, her maybe-kind-of-husband, her maybe-kind-of-husband’s-work-mate, all of them. The whole lot of ‘em. Out. Gone. Now. Yesterday.”
“Want I should kill ‘em?” Jack asked in a dry tone. He’d made himself comfortable with a glass of the Doctor’s best scotch, and lounged with a leg slung over one of the Doctor’s wingbacks - the irreverent posture of a man who was absolutely assured of his welcome in his friend’s space.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” the Doctor snapped, giving him a withering look.
“Well I don’t know what you want me to do, then,” Jack said, taking a sip of his drink. “You’ve earned this, you know. You really have. Rose was terrified when you regenerated. I’ve seen her facing a lot of dangerous and scary shit, like it was nothing. Remember that time with the Retan chieftain, when they were planning to sacrifice her? Or when that fat Slitheen was choking her? It takes a lot to scare her, and I’ve never seen her scared quite like she was when you regenerated. According to Jacks, the last time she saw her daughter like that was when just after her ex-boyfriend beat the shit out of her, and Rose had to defend herself with a cricket bat.”
The Doctor felt the blood drain from his face and immediately start roaring in his ears. His fists clenched by his sides and his voice was low, controlled, but he felt the storm brewing just under the surface. “Rose what?”
“You didn’t know about that?”
He spoke through a clenched jaw. “She’s only told me bits and pieces. Alluded to things. Told me he forced her to quitting school and other situations she didn’t want, like waitressing and cleaning up after him. Pushed her around. Then there was a fight and he left her for another woman. She never mentioned any violence or a cricket bat.”
“That’s a very, very simplified and cleaned-up version of what she told me,” Jack sat up and the Doctor released his clenched fists, flexed his fingers, clenched them again. He had to calm down; he couldn’t react no matter what Jack told him. He mustn’t let his temper get away from him. No matter what.
“He literally pushed her around,” Jack continued once he’d made himself comfortable again. “He coerced her into having sex with him by dangling other women in front of her face. She wasn’t even seventeen yet and had no idea what a healthy relationship was supposed to look like. Her father had been dead her whole life and her mother had had a string of short-term boyfriends. She was a clueless kid. But then she wised up and tried to leave. That shitstain beat her up. She got scared and defended herself with a cricket bat. Got a few good licks in, too, from what I hear.”
“Of course she did,” the Doctor said, fierce, hot pride suffusing his veins alongside the anger. His precious girl would never stand for that kind of treatment.
“And according to her mom, the look she had in her eyes that night is the same look she had the night you regenerated.”
The Doctor deflated. He’d had no idea that he’d made her so afraid, had brought about the same kind of intense, soul-shattering fear that her ex - a miserable excuse for a human being - had caused in her. He’d done that. He’d caused her to feel that way.
Any and all hatred and anger should be self-directed. He hadn’t meant to, but he’d wounded her as much as that son of a bitch, Jimmy Stone.
“I had no idea.”
“So you can see why everyone is so protective.”
“Yeah. Makes a bit more sense.” The Doctor slumped into the other chair in front of the fireplace across from Jack, defeated. “What do I do though, Jack? How do I fix all of this? I miss her so much it makes me hurt to see her, because I can’t get near her, can’t touch her. I mean it actually, properly, physically hurts. And even though I can’t hold her or touch her, I positively itch to see her when she’s not around. Not literally, of course, that isn’t a proper biological response to longing for someone. The proper biological response is actually a stimulation of the vagus nerve, which connects the abdomen to the chest and neck, causing pain, tension and nausea. So the aching I feel is actually continuous, the itching I'm describing is just for conversational flair. Actual itching would be ridiculous... Doesn’t make sense. It’s just a figure of speech. Figures of speech don’t have to make sense - even the phrase ‘figure of speech’ doesn’t really -” he stopped suddenly, his eyes widening, then slammed both hands down on the leather arms of his chair. “Oh for fuck’s sake!”
Jack looked at him sympathetically. “Still working on that runaway mouth, eh?”
“Yeah,” the Doctor said, ruffling his own hair and leaning forward to prop his head on his elbows, looking subdued.
“Give it time, Doc. You’re a likeable guy in this body. Pleasant. Affable. Much less of an asshole this go-round.” The Doctor glared at him and Jack held up his hands in a gesture of surrender, grinning and holding his glass of scotch loosely between two fingers. “Hey, I liked you well enough before. I’m just sayin’, some others found you a bit...brusque. That won’t be a problem in this body, I don’t think. The only person who probably doesn’t like you and won’t like you is Mickey. He’s probably a lost cause.”
“I could give a rat’s arse what Mickey thinks of me,” the Doctor griped. “I only care about what Rose thinks of me.” He ran his fingers through his hair again absently, blowing out his breath, staring into the middle distance. “She won’t even call me ‘Doctor,’ Jack.”
“What do you mean?” Jack asked, sounding confused. “I’ve heard her call you ‘Doctor’ over the last few days.”
“Not if I’m in the room, she won’t, and she won’t address me as ‘Doctor’,” he said, miserable. “She’s very careful not to do so.”
“Rose is going to love you again,” Jack assured him. “She just needs time. You and I broke her trust pretty badly, Doc.”
“She’s not punishing you,” the Doctor grumbled.
“I’m not married to her,” Jack reasoned.
"Bonded. We're bonded."
Jack waved a dismissive hand. “Whatever. And it wasn’t my place to tell her about regeneration, just the immortality thing.” The Doctor huffed at that and Jack rolled his eyes at the Doctor’s bluster. This version of the Doctor really was a lot less terrifying.
“Simmer on the back burner for a bit, Doc. Just be around instead of trying to blaze in the forefront of her mind. Let everyone get used to you at their own pace. Then they’ll slowly fade out and you’ll have made more progress with Rose than you think, without realizing it.”
The Doctor looked up at Jack hopefully. “You really think so?”
“I really know so. Rose wants to be with you, but she’s scared. All she’s really asking - all she really wants - is to know you a little better.”
Jack gave him a reassuring nod, and the Doctor sighed loudly, burying his face in his palms then rubbing his eyes with the heels of his hands. “I hope you’re right.”
“Jesus, Doc,” Jack said, smiling against the rim of his glass. “I thought you were a besotted old fool before.”
“Oh, Jack. It seems I’m only living to fall more in love with Rose Tyler.”
“That’s a good line, Doc. You should use it. Mind if I steal it?”
“Be my guest.”
“Thanks. But what I meant is that I thought you were the most lovesick man I’d ever seen when I first met you, in your old body. Now you seem to be actually, literally sick with love.”
“I was, and I am. Vagus nerve, remember?” Then he pouted, “Rose loved me in my old body.”
“She’s going to love you in this one, too. Just give it time.” He gave the Doctor a cheeky grin. “You’re quite cute this time around.”
“Oi! Time Lords aren’t ‘cute’!”
“You are, though. Not that you weren’t last time, too.”
“Oi!”
“Just sayin’.”
~*~O~*~
Once he’d recovered from his excitement over Rose’s agreement to ‘date’ him, the Doctor had suggested spending time together in the evenings, just as they had in the very beginning of their relationship. He’d moved the TARDIS into the library and suggested that they could watch telly in there or in the lounge. Perhaps they could just have dinner together, or perhaps she’d like to join him in his workshop just as she used to do, and they’d stargaze at the ’enchanted ceiling’ of his workshop...or maybe they could stargaze in the garden of the manor. Whatever she’d like to do, he’d be glad to do it.
He’d suggested all of these things while he clearly (and fondly) called to mind nights alone with Rose, lying back on the pile of cushions in his workshop, looking up at the ‘enchanted ceiling’ and holding hands while the Doctor told her stories of adventures he’d had and places he’d like to take her. He recalled reading her fairy tales from all over time and space, delighting in her delight. He had read and re-read her favorite fairy tale, “Haraile and the Golden Sparrow” to her, holding the book one-handed when she decided she wanted to be closer and would lift his arm and slide up against him, curling under the pink blanket he’d bought for her so long ago.
This was the way they’d fallen in love with each other...slowly, with gentle, tentative touches that grew more bold over time, despite their uncertainty. It was clear to everyone around them that, while they were individuals, they were also a single, cohesive, indivisible unit: The-Doctor-And-Rose-Tyler. By the time Jack came aboard and they danced in the console room, it was nothing at all for Rose to fall asleep curled into the Doctor’s chest while they watched one of the Eitakan romantic comedies that she loved so much (and he only grumbled about because he liked it when she batted her lashes at him and said ‘please’). Jack’s presence didn’t interrupt this flow of The-Doctor-And-Rose-Tyler; in fact, much to the Doctor’s surprise, Jack being around actually enhanced it. No one was a bigger fan of The-Doctor-And-Rose-Tyler than Jack, and Jack, although his presence had initially worried and frustrated the Doctor, had not hindered (and had actually helped) the two on their path to becoming what they became - bondmates and parents-to-be.
When the Doctor had asked Rose about spending the evenings with her, he had not planned on game nights with Rose’s mother, ex-boyfriend, two Torchwood agents from another universe, and Jack.
That’s what he’d gotten, however.
It’s not that the evenings weren’t fun. It’s that they were bloody miserable.
The day after his regeneration, Jackie had found an old game of Risk hiding in the top of a closet somewhere. (How it got there and what she had been doing there, the Doctor really didn't want to know.) He had scoffed to himself when Mickey suggested they all play, but the idea had been a popular one, so after dinner that night, play they did. And they’d played every night since.
Ordinarily, this would have been a boon for the Doctor. He’d have jumped at the chance to sit in the chair next to Rose and teach her the game, showing off more than a little, instructing her on how to strategize and conquer armies and lands. The Doctor, despite being a non-aggressive sort when the consequences impacted people’s lives, was quite the warlord when it came to board games and showed no mercy, no quarter. He took no prisoners and very, very rarely lost. In fact, the last time he lost any board game had been to a fellow Time Lord in venusian chess, and he’d been drunk at the time.
Playing against six humans? At Risk? Cakewalk.
It turned out that Pete, in the days since he’d met Rose, had found himself feeling quite paternal towards her. He confessed to the Doctor that he’d always wanted children, but his universe’s version of Jackie had been very vain and never wanted to ruin her figure. This Jackie delighted in motherhood, however, and he found himself terribly fond of Rose. Rose seemed to reciprocate his feelings, and the Doctor was happy for both of them.
Except that Pete took it upon himself to spend quite a bit of time with Rose, including teaming with her every night and teaching her how to play.
Dammit.
Jack and Jackie teamed up, as did Jake and Mickey, leaving the Doctor a team unto himself. This was perfectly fine with the Doctor, he’d have no trouble decimating the others.
But he couldn’t exactly annihilate his wife’s army, could he? Particularly when he was trying to get into her good graces.
So he pulled his punches every night, coming in second place, letting Mickey and Jake beat him once (because the absolute destruction of the younger man's pride and near-immediate elimination he wanted to deal the Idiot would certainly have displeased Rose) and the other two teams beat him twice each. Jack and Rose both shot him looks, but he just smiled and tried not to let on.
The Doctor couldn’t spend any time with Rose during the day, either. The days were busy, filled primarily with meetings and planning sessions about the rebuilding of Torchwood for the men (including, to the Doctor’s great surprise, Mickey). Rose and Jackie spent their time together shopping for the girls, for the house, visiting with Sarah Jane and/or Martha talking to the decorator about the rooms that had not been finished and hanging paint samples in the girls’ room. Meals were often taken separately, or on the run.
Rose was as good as her word, though, when it came to his request that she not keep him from the girls. He asked to touch her belly and try to sense them or speak to them once a day, usually, and she never denied him. He was beginning to sense emotions from them, stronger every day, and he delighted in their strengthening ability. They were always happy for his contact, and Rose seemed glad to hear that news from him. He suggested that she try sending her emotions to them and try to receive from them as well, and she said that she would do so...right before she told him goodnight, went into their bedroom, and shut the door behind herself.
Every time that door clicked shut, the Doctor felt a surge of discouragement, but he always crammed it down on his way back to the library and the TARDIS. Their houseguests would be gone soon, he told himself, and he’d have a chance to charm his wife once more. There was time. It had only been five days.
~*~O~*~
Miraculously, blessedly, like a gift from the gods, the Doctor’s house began to clear out on the sixth day after his regeneration.
He had spent a great deal of time talking with Pete, Jake, Jack and Mickey about the rebuilding of Torchwood. The Doctor, himself, wanted no part of the actual rebuilding, but he was more than willing to serve in an advisory capacity. He was only a little surprised when Jack showed interest in helping to rebuild, and pulled him aside to ask about it. Jack said he felt like he had something to offer, and a chance to actually do good. Why shouldn’t he? The Doctor had to admit that he was a little bit impressed by that thinking. He’d known his friend was a good man, but Jack was tying himself to 21st century Earth for a while in order to do good for the planet - and he was doing it willingly. The Doctor was proud.
Mickey had decided to come on board and help, and the Doctor was downright shocked when Pete and Jack welcomed his help. Mickey had no experience with aliens beyond knowing him, cowering behind Rose when they went up against the nestene consciousness, and tripping and falling over housekeeping carts when they were chasing down Margaret the Slitheen. Still, the Doctor supposed some experience was better than none.
This news of rebuilding the government agency hadn’t exactly thrilled him, initially. He’d assumed that the group would be using his home as a base of operations for a time, until arrangements could be made for a flat for Pete and Jake in London. However, Mickey offered to put up his new mate Jake, and Jackie, bless her for the accommodating soul that she was, offered to extend houseroom to Pete, earning snickers from the Doctor and a bright red flush from Rose. Jackie primly informed Jack that since she only had one spare bedroom, he would have to work something else out or commute from the manor. Jack just gave her a cheeky grin and told her that it was alright, that he’d be glad to keep staying at Smithwood, and for her and Pete to have fun.
And so it was that after nearly a week of his family and friends frustrating his efforts with Rose at every turn, he watched Pete and Jackie cram into the backseat of Mickey’s old beetle while Jake sat in the front and the lot of them pulled out of the long drive, headed for London. The Doctor did his best not to relax his shoulders, collapse in a heap, and heave a sigh of relief while Jack slipped his arm around Rose’s shoulders in a comforting gesture that wasn't welcome from him just yet.
Thinking about what was facing him once he went inside, he did blow out his cheeks and put his hands on his hips as he stared into the middle distance. He had a long road ahead of him that he’d only been able to plan before this moment. Now it was time to put the plan into action, and it was a bit nerve-racking. Just a tiny bit. An eensy bit.
But although the thought was daunting, he was almost looking forward to the challenge of seducing his wife all over again. How many men got to do that? Not very many, he’d bet. He was viewing it as an adventure - and it was, in a sense. But he knew it was actually more like playing Risk - a long game. A game of strategy. A waiting game.
He’d pull no punches this time, though. He’d not be bested. Oh, no. The Doctor was playing to win, and the prize was the heart of his wife.
He’d be relentless and unyielding until he had claimed it.
Never play a waiting game with a Time Lord, he thought with a little smirk.
Notes:
I'm going to be referencing a lot of stuff that happened in the story before this one, Healing. It's not imperative that you read that story to understand this story, you'll get along in this one just fine and don't need to go back and read something else, but it gives a bit of background to this - like Rose's backstory with Jimmy Stone.
Coming up: Our heroes begin to get reacquainted. Will there be laughter? Will there be tears? Will there be flirting? Will there be romance? Will there be playful banter? Will there be heart-to-heart talks? Will there be dancing?
Stay tuned to find out! Same bat-time, same bat-channel...Updates every Monday and Thursday!
Chapter 28: Rose's Interlude
Summary:
Rose does some thinking, then she and the Doctor have a talk.
Notes:
tw - oblique and quick reference to suicidal intent
Chapter Text
*~*~*Twenty-Five Weeks*~*~*
Rose had spent very little time with the new Doctor in the past week, but it had been a wonderful opportunity to observe how he handled frustration. She knew that he was irritated with all of the extra houseguests staying in their home, but he seemed (from her vantage point) to take it fairly well, with only a bit of pouting that she’d seen. It seemed that this Doctor was more of a pouter than a brooder, and she wasn’t sorry to see that. There was a fine line between pouting and brooding, but she could deal with one better than the other.
She had very mixed feelings about the last several days, and the Doctor was only the tip of the iceberg. Rose wasn’t surprised when her mum wanted to stick around for a little while after she’d experienced a major emotional trauma; her mum was her mum, and if there was one thing that could be said for Jackie Tyler, she was a good mother. Jackie wasn’t at all in doubt of this new man’s claim to be the Doctor, nor was she concerned about him one bit. Her concern was for Rose and the babies. Jackie was ready to go just a day or so after the Doctor woke up, but stuck around without any real prodding from Rose.
She’d been a bit surprised by Mickey’s decision to stay until she saw the way her best mate looked at Martha, then it had all made a bit more sense. Of course, Martha’s fluttering lashes at Mickey had only intensified his awkward flirting. Rose was delighted with the potential match, and did everything she could to egg the two on, going so far as to invent reasons to get Martha out to the house a couple of the days Mickey had been around, just to get the two of them together.
During the times that Mickey hadn’t been making eyes at Martha, he’d been bonding with Jake and the two had become fast friends. As it happened, Mickey was a dead ringer for Jake’s best mate Rickey back home, and although their personalities were very different, he and Jake still hit it off right away. It was easy for Rose to see why; Jake was quick with a smile or a joke, laughed easily, and told wild, hilarious stories that rivaled Jack’s. Rose had become fond of the young blond bloke herself, and when it became clear that sexual tension would never become an issue between she and Jake - ever - and that Jake would be more much more likely to cry on her shoulder than cry over her, she relaxed even further. It would be wonderful to have a mate like him to pal around with.
Pete...well, the situation with Pete was complicated, to say the very least. Rose knew that this man wasn’t her father. She’d watched her father die - twice - in 1987. However, she couldn’t quite make that knowledge stretch the eighteen inches from her brain to her heart. Something about him was comfortable. Something about him felt right.
Something about him sure felt right to her mother, she thought with a cringe. Jackie had accepted this new Pete easily, after the initial shock. Which was good, she supposed. She wanted her mum to be happy, and her mum had never had anything but good things to say about her dad. She’d seen them bickering in 1987, but when he’d been about to sacrifice himself, she’d seen her mother upset about it. Rose knew, without any doubt, that her mother had loved her father dearly and had missed him after he died. She knew, also, that while she had pursued relationships with other men after his passing, none of them had ever made her happy. She’d never even considered longevity with any of them. So for Jackie to have a chance at having her long lost love back, to have a chance at happiness...Rose was happy for her mum. Pete seemed to care very much about her mother, even after only knowing this version of her for such a short time. And Jackie had welcomed Pete with open arms.
She was quite sure she knew what the Doctor - either Doctor - would say with a wink and a nudge… “Open arms. Think that’s all, eh?” And then cackle madly when she swatted him.
Oh, her Doctor.
Her Doctor.
The first time Rose thought of this new man in pinstripes as anything other than the “substitute Doctor”, the first time she thought of him as hers on the day before her mum and other houseguests left, she broke down into bitter, angry sobs. Her mother, by now used to such outbursts, had just slipped her arm around Rose’s shoulders and let her cry.
It was terribly unfair, she thought, tears flowing into the curled hands over her eyes, that he was so bloody good-looking. And charming. Why’d he have to be so charming? Her Doctor - her first Doctor, her brain helpfully reminded her, had been ruggedly handsome. He wasn’t the sort of man that she would have pulled in a pub, but she’d have been missing out. His good looks were connected to the beauty of his soul, and once she’d seen that about him she could never see him as anything but dazzlingly attractive.
He could be unpleasant and coarse as sandpaper for everyone else he encountered. But her… He’d treated her as delicately as spun glass. The touch of his work-roughened hands had never been anything but soft and tender against her skin and he’d delighted in her, every moment that he’d spent with her.
This new Doctor - her new Doctor- thank you again for the reminder, brain - was bloody dreamy, by any standards. He should have looked ridiculous, what with his too-tight pinstriped suit and Converse and hair sticking up in all directions. Instead, he was splendidly, devastatingly gorgeous. Everything looked just right on him. And then, every now and then, just to ramp it up another level for her, he’d pull out his specs and slip them up his nose.
The Doctor had bragged about his superior physiology from the day she’d met him. There was absolutely no reason that he should have poor eyesight. He should not need glasses. But oh, how she loved when he put them on.
The differences she noted weren’t solely physical, or related to outward appearance in some way. It seemed that, to this new Doctor, everything was an adventure waiting to happen. He was a bundle of energy, always just on the verge of a bounce. He seemed full - full of life, full of joy, full of unrestrained enthusiasm for even the smallest mysteries of the world around him.
Until he looked at her. She saw something different.
Behind the façade of joyful exuberance that he presented to the world was a stoic sadness that took Rose back in time - back to the beginning, to the nights spent together on the TARDIS, when the two of them still looked at each other with what they believed to be unrequited love. Now, when this new Doctor looked at her, his chocolate brown eyes conveyed the very same emotions they had when they’d been ice blue.
Longing.
Reverence.
Passion.
Enchantment.
Rapture.
Love.
The look in his eyes hadn’t changed at all.
And when he looked at her that way, her heart skipped a beat and it was all she could do to keep from snogging him senseless.
How could she do that? How could she betray her husband in such a way?
But he is your husband, the voice inside her mind reminded her.
She was amazed when, for the first time since he regenerated, she didn’t argue with herself. She was able to accept that this Doctor was still the same man. Her husband.
~*~O~*~
He’d gone back to the TARDIS after they’d waved goodbye to everyone in the driveway when they drove away, retreating to gather his thoughts. Besides, he thought, she probably needs a bit of space right now. He could give that to her, and then go talk to her in a bit, he decided.
And he had. He’d intended to go to her. He’d had plans. But he’d barely had time to figure out how to enact his brilliant plans before she’d come to him.
He was in his workshop on the TARDIS, tidying up after his former self, when a voice behind him said very clearly, “It’s not that you changed, you know.”
The Doctor bolted upright, sending mechanical parts flying in multiple directions. Rose took a reflexive step back from the clamor while the Doctor scrambled, trying (and failing) to catch components as they fell off his workbench. Giving it up as a bad job, he let the parts fall and winced a little at the clanging and banging all around them. He tried for nonchalance, slipping his hands in his pockets, and was gratified to see a ghost of a smile tugging at the corners of Rose’s mouth.
The round cover of an extrapolator rolled towards her and wobbled, coming to stop against her foot. She knocked it over, gently.
The Doctor reached up and scratched the back of his head. “Er, what was that? You were saying?”
“I said, ‘It’s not that you changed’.”
“I heard, but what did you mean by that?”
“Can I come in?”
“Of course, you can always come in,” he said. “But wouldn’t you be more comfortable in the library?”
“No, ta. I think I’d like to look at the enchanted ceiling a bit, actually.” She picked through the aisles of parts and half-finished projects to get to the pile of cushions in the corner, where the TARDIS had provided several more soft and cushy pillows in deference to her condition. Rose sank down, and the Doctor sent a silent thanks to his Old Girl when he saw how comfortable she looked on the additional cushions his ship had provided for Rose.
The Doctor looked at her for a moment, wondering what to do, scrubbing the back of his neck. He longed to sit with her, his fingers were practically itching to touch hers, but he didn’t dare make any sort of overture without her express permission.
“Shall I, er, may I join you?”
“If you like, but I’m in no mood for a cuddle. I want to talk.”
“Yes. Brilliant. Right-o, Rose Tyler...oh, that’s terrible. Never let me say that again,” he complained, dropping onto the cushions not far away from her and wrapping his arms around his knees. He turned his head to look at her. “Alright, Here I am. I’m all ears. Well, not so much as last time, really, but…” he caught her glare. “Yes, right. Shutting up, now.”
“You’re very clever. I want you to imagine something for me. Alright?”
“Alright.”
“Imagine you’re in our bed, asleep. Imagine we’re snuggled up together and you feel warm and safe. Everything is pleasant and happy. Maybe you’re in the middle of a wonderful dream. But the overwhelming feeling is safety. You never want that feeling to end, and you have no reason to believe it will end.
“But you do wake up, and when you do, I’m gone. Nothing is familiar, and you can’t see. You can’t see anything, but you can sense that everything is wrong, and everything is on fire.
“Then, just as suddenly, you can see again. You’re surrounded by everyone you love, except I’m still gone and there’s someone who says they’re me and everyone you love and trust says they’re me. But they’re not. Nothing makes sense to you, and you find out that you could have been prepared for this all along, could have expected it, if only someone had told you.”
She brushed away the tears that had spilled onto her cheeks. “That’s what this regeneration has felt like. It felt like the world was on fire, and I couldn’t see anything, then everything is different when I can finally see again. It’s not the change so much as the fact that I was caught off guard. And nothing could make that better.”
“Oh, Rose,” he said, but the rest of the words died at the back of his throat. What were you supposed to say to something like that?
“I was scared before...before you regenerated -”
The Doctor whipped his head to the side, surprised. “You were?”
“Of course I was!”
“Why would you be scared?” He asked, genuinely confused.
“How could I not be? I’m twenty-one and pregnant with twins! That’s terrifying!”
“I had no idea you were afraid, Rose.”
“I wasn’t nearly so scared until you left me.”
Something inside of him tensed, but he had no idea if it was fear, outrage or hurt. “But I haven’t left you!”
She swiped at the wetness on her cheeks again. “It doesn’t quite feel like that on my end.” He opened his mouth to protest and she went on. “Look, I know it’s you, alright? I’ve told you that before. I know that you’re him and he’s you. I’m not questioning that. But up until we bonded a few weeks ago, I was constantly preparing myself for you to leave me at some point. I was always bracing myself for the inevitable.”
Now it was hurt and a deep, deep sadness - not for him, but for the woman next to him. The woman he loved more than anything, whom he’d hurt so desperately. “Oh, Rose, how could you even think that?”
“How could I not? You did leave me, didn’t you? You’re still here, but I didn’t know that for a while, did I? You were asleep and I know it was just a blink for you and that in reality, it was only one night for me but let me tell you, that night was an eternity. Do you know I lay in the chair beside the bed and tried to figure out how I was going to raise alien twin girls by myself at twenty-one years old?”
“I’d never-”
“How was I to know that? Huh?”
He shut up. She needed to get this out, and he deserved this. Every cell in his body screamed at him to take her into his arms, to kiss away her fear and doubt, to make her understand that he would never, ever leave her, but he couldn’t. He shouldn’t. He really shouldn’t.
“Mum and Pete were ready to leave after two days. They believed who you were. Mickey did, too. They all stuck by me as much as I wanted them to, though. Mickey a little bit more, just because he likes winding you up. Jack was ready to leave me with you right away. He did leave me with you right away. And I trusted Jack, for the most part. But I’m the one that made my Mum and the rest stay. I’m the one that made Martha and Sarah Jane keep coming back. They’re the ones that insisted they go, and I finally let them.
“I wanted them around because I was afraid. I know I told you the day after you regenerated that I’d give you time and that I’d date you, and I didn’t mean to lie to you. I meant what I said, and I still mean it. But I was afraid, alright? I was afraid of you, of being alone with you. Afraid of what I’d do, afraid of what you’d do. Not afraid that you’d hurt me,” she hastened to assure him, and he shut his mouth again. “Afraid that you’d make me...I don’t even know how to express what I’ve been afraid of. Afraid you wouldn’t give me time to be angry, I suppose. Afraid that I’d fall for you too soon. Afraid that I wouldn’t grieve properly, that I would betray you by loving you. And that doesn’t make any fucking sense!”
He reached into his pocket and pulled out a handkerchief, handing it to her without a word. She took it, equally silent, sniffing and blowing her nose before she continued.
“I’ve been so angry, and so confused, and so uncertain, and so alone. I’ve missed you so much; even though you’ve been here you’ve not been here. I’ve not heard your voice in a week, and I’m starting to realize and accept that I’ll never hear it again. I’ve got to get used to an entirely new voice saying my name now. And it’s a lovely voice, I’m sure I’m going to love it, but I just miss the way you used to say ‘I love you, Rose Tyler…’” She cried for a minute or so, and then got herself together enough to go on. “But how selfish is that? How selfish is it to deny myself and you when we’re both right here? How awful am I to refuse to get to know you when you’re ready and waiting to let me? I’m being terrible and I know it, and I think that I’ve finally bled out. This regeneration, all of it...it cut so deep, but it won’t bleed anymore.” She snuffled to a stopping point and wiped her eyes with purpose. “I think it’s time to heal. I think I’m ready to heal. I know I am. I don’t want to feel like this anymore, I want to feel like I used to.”
The Doctor nodded. He wasn’t sure what to say, really, but he knew there were things to say. He paused to gather his thoughts for a few minutes. Rose didn’t press him, and he was glad. After a few moments, she lay back against the cushions and lay her hands across her belly, threading her fingers over the swell of her abdomen that protected their babies. He looked over at her for a minute, then lay back himself, his head lying near hers, his body at an angle that pointed away.
“You know...” he began after a while, studying the enchanted ceiling intently. The Coral Nebula floated above him, and he studied it without even seeing it. “I’ve spent so very long trying to fix the universe. And when everything fell apart, when all the Time Lords were gone, Gallifrey was gone, when I was suddenly alone, I thought perhaps that that life was gone, too.
“You said that my regeneration was a shock, like waking up with the house on fire, being blind. I can relate to that a bit, I think. The Time War and the...the end of it was something like that.” He fiddled with his ear for a second. “I’d had the Time Lords in my head for so many centuries, all my life, really, telling me what to do. Not that I’d ever listened, really, but they were always there, chattering away in the back of my mind.” He stopped for a second to gather his thoughts, threading his fingers behind his head, the casual gesture belying the anxiety he felt at his own words. This was the ugliest part of himself. The Time War and what he’d had to do had nearly ripped him apart. He closed his own eyes to the truth of himself. What would she do? He second-guessed his ability to go on, to reveal himself like this.
But this was about trust, and she’d made herself vulnerable to him. He could do no less.
Bracing himself, he went on. “When the Time War began, all that chatter became much more intense. Louder. More insistent. And then, when The Moment came and they were all gone...well, I was asked to do what I did, and even though I thought I was prepared for it, I wasn’t. You described going from a warm cozy sleep to a burning room. For me, it was like being in a screaming hell and then being thrust deep below a vast, freezing ocean, alone, and I couldn’t ever reach the surface.”
“I didn’t-”
He cut her off. “I’m not trying to compare experiences, Rose, not really. I could feel what you felt if you cared to show me or I cared to look for it, and you could do the same, through our bond. But there’s no need for that. They’re two different experiences. Apples and oranges; equal but different. Maybe that’s a bad example, apples and oranges are delicious. Perhaps I should say bartlett and d’anjou pears. Two types of rubbish fruit. That would be a bit more…”
“I think you may be getting off point here.”
“Right. I did have a point,” he said, a bit more determined. He paused again before he went on, considering his words, deciding if he really wanted to reveal this much. After a bit of consideration, he decided that hiding truths about himself is what had gotten himself into this mess in the first place.
“I’d been a renegade, a rebel. I’d flouted every decree. But I’d have given every minute of every regeneration not to be alone anymore. All of my people were gone, lost. So I tried to join them.” Rose’s sharp inhalation let her know that she understood his meaning. “The TARDIS wouldn’t let me. She stopped me, and when I agreed not to actively take myself out of the universe and she was sure I wasn’t lying, I asked her to take me somewhere for some adventure. My plan was to burn through my regenerations as quickly as I could. She took me to London, 2005. There, I found the greatest adventure ever.”
Rose didn’t respond for a second, then the penny dropped and she sounded surprised. “Me?”
The Doctor chuckled. “You. And you were my saving grace, Rose Tyler.” He smiled up at the ceiling, remembering. “You impressed me right off, and I wanted to see you again. I’d entertained the thought of letting myself get blown up in that explosion and being shot of one regeneration, but realized I didn’t want to. I wanted to see you again, as myself.
“So I tracked you down the next day, thinking that maybe my memory was faulty or that it was a fluke and you weren’t as brilliant as I’d thought when I met you. But oh, you were even more clever than I’d remembered. So I took your hand, told you about the turn of the Earth, and I did my best to make sure you’d remember me when I told you to forget me.”
“It worked,” she muttered.
He smirked up at nothing, then sobered. “You saved me in more ways than one that day, Rose Tyler,” he said fondly.
“You saved me, too, you know,” she murmured.
“I know,” he said. “I wanted to take you out of that life. I wanted to give you more than I knew you’d have if you stayed behind with your mum and Mickey. I wanted to give you the stars. I knew you deserved them. But I don’t think I knew that I wanted to give you all of those things right away. I was still sick at heart, there was still more emptiness in me than anything else. I’m pretty sure all I knew right then was that my world was hopeless, dark and cold, but you weren’t. You were a bright, warm little light. And a light in the darkness always changes everything.”
“So you were broken and needed me.”
“Yes.”
“Just like I’m broken now. And I need you.”
“I’m so sorry, Rose.”
“So we’re both kintsugi.”
The Doctor pondered what she was saying for a moment. “Oh, Rose Tyler,” he smiled, “You are brilliant. I think you’re exactly right.” Then, slowly, “Do you think we can put ourselves back together again? Can you forgive me?”
“Yes,” she answered him, almost immediately. “I’m sure we can. Forgiveness isn’t the issue,” she said simply. “I forgive you. That hasn’t been the problem for a while; I forgave you within a day or so.”
Of course you did, he thought, wryly. You’re Rose Tyler, and you’re the embodiment of compassion.
“I’m just hurt, and like I told you, I need to learn you again. I got a bit of a start while everyone was here, but I was afraid to let them leave. I needed time to observe you, I suppose. I’m ready now.”
The Doctor was silent for a while, then his thoughts got the better of him. “You haven’t called me by my name since… weeelll...since before my regeneration. Why won’t you call me ‘Doctor’?” he asked, apropos of nothing.
She seemed to consider for a moment. “Because like I said - I know that you’re the Doctor in my head, but my heart still needs to figure that out. It may be terrible of me, and if it is I’ll beg your forgiveness, but you have to prove to me that you are still my husband. Everyone else in the world has to earn that title. You’re no different.”
The comment stung him, but he wasn’t about to argue with her right now.
He didn’t say anything and tried not to look at her, afraid that he’d never look away.
“You know Sarah Jane, you’re friends with her now. You know I’ve taken on other companions before so that I wouldn’t be alone. But you also know that there’s never been another you. I’ve shared my ship with people, but never my life.” Rose made a little sound of assent. “It’s been an adjustment, sharing my life with you, to say the least. I was a bachelor for nine centuries!”
That earned him a little laugh, and he gambled, rolling onto his side and adjusting himself so that he was lying parallel to her with his head propped on his elbow, looking down at her a bit. It was with great restraint that he didn’t trace his fingers across hers, covering their daughters. He let his eyes run up and down her hands for a moment, instead.
“I’m rubbish at relationships, Rose. I’ve never been very good at knowing what someone wanted from me and responding accordingly. How I managed to make you so happy in my last body, I’ll never understand. But I swear to you, right here and now, I’m going to do my very best to be the best I can be for you. I’m going to do my best, but I really am shoddy at human relationships. I mean, blimey, I’m not even human!”
She huffed a laugh through the tears dripping from the corners of her eyes, and he smiled at her, brushing one away. The touch was a balm, and his soul relaxed a little from the contact. “I might be a rubbish husband, Rose, but I love you to the very limits of time and space, and then beyond. And I’ll spend the rest of our lives proving it, if you’ll let me. No matter what I look like. Alright?”
She just nodded, and he smiled down at her, a soft and gentle thing. “Good. Now, if you need more time to get used to this face and this personality, I’ll give it to you. I’ll give you all the time you need. To be honest, I’m learning myself as well. But there’s something you should know going into this period of time where you’re getting to know your husband again.”
“What’s that?” She looked at him curiously.
“I don’t know if you know this or not, but, well…” he tugged his ear and looked away with a grin before he grinned back at her playfully. “The Doctor is known throughout time and space as a bit of a flirt. Just an eensy bit, though. He can’t seem to help it, the poor sod. But see, there’s a catch. Thing is, the bloke only has eyes for his wife. He’s all gone for her. Which means that since I’m the Doctor,” he poked himself in the chest in an exaggerated fashion, “all of my attentions are going to be focused on you,” he swirled his finger in the air before he landed his fingertip to *boop* her on the nose, “Rose Marion Tyler. And rumor has it that this new body is particularly charming.”
Rose giggled; rather helplessly, he thought with a self-satisfied smile.
Chapter 29: Paint and Parsnips, Pasta and Potter
Notes:
There seems to be a group of you who follow this fic from update to update, who have put up with this story through meandering and angst and my own crippling insecurities. this chapter is for you guys. <3 <3 <3
I happened to watch The Producers the other day, and the idea of our Jack performing this song wouldn't get out of my head. It was further inspired by this picture and the fact that John Barrowman is actually in The Producers.
You endured the angst, here's (some) payoff.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
*~*~*Twenty-Six Weeks*~*~*
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Rose had had several best mates in her life. Shareen was the friend with whom she had swapped secrets, gushed about boys, and dressed in much-too-mature-for-their-age clothes and snuck out to clubs when she was a teenager. Mickey was the friend who had always been there to catch her when she fell, who had helped her pick up the pieces after Jimmy Stone did his dead-level best to ruin her life. The Doctor was the friend who had believed in her potential, took her on mad adventures, and eventually became the love of her life.
But she’d never had a friend like Jack, who would stop in the middle of helping to paint the nursery for her twin girls just to cheer her up by putting on music from his phone, singing and dancing a show tune for her with a ridiculous feminine voice and Swedish accent.
”When you got it, show it! Put your hidden treasures on display! Violinists love to play an e-string, but audiences really love a g-string!”
Rose giggled, covering her mouth with both hands, one of those hands holding a paintbrush covered in grey paint and coming perilously close to her hair.
Jack looked at Rose with comically wide eyes and a goofy smile, clearly still in character and still with the goofy voice and accent.
“Remember when Ula dance?”
Rose nodded. “Yeah?”
“Ula dance again!”
And he proceeded to prance around the room with a silly little shaking of his bottom.
Rose covered her belly and laughed uproariously, not caring about getting paint everywhere at the moment, watching Jack spin and then plop himself onto a plastic-covered chair and put his elbows on his knees, then prop his head in his hands.
”When I was just a little girl in Sweden, my thoughtful mother gave me this advice…
If nature blesses you from top to bottom...show that top to bottom don’t think twiiiiiiice!”
He got up and danced with her around the room, still singing, Rose laughing gleefully and Jack twirling her, still singing.
“Don’t be shy, be bold and cute,” he sang to her in a silly, little voice. “Show the boys your birthday suit!”
Rose giggled. He winked then whirled her towards the doorway. She yelped his name and spun right into the Doctor’s arms. The laughter stopped abruptly when she saw the pinstripes in front of her, and she looked up into his twinkling eyes. The babies began their own little dance, kicking and jostling around.
The Doctor looked up at Jack, his eyes still brimming with good humor. “I’ll thank you not be showing off your birthday suit, Jack, ta,” he said, looking as if he were barely suppressing a laugh.
“Aww,” Jack pouted, his own voice cheerful. “You’re no fun.”
“Sorry,” Rose muttered, tearing her eyes away from his face. She really shouldn’t look up at the line of his jaw, the light stubble she saw there. She really shouldn’t be taking deep breaths through her nose because he smelled so good. “We were just having a laugh.”
“By all means,” he smiled down at her. “Don’t stop on my account.”
“I’m getting paint on your sleeve,” she said, the thought just spilling out of her mouth when she saw the imprint her brush was making on the pinstriped sleeve. Blue today, she noted. He’d not released her from the hold he had on her, as if they were about to take off dancing across the room any second.
She was only a little surprised to find that she didn’t mind that idea at all.
He followed her gaze down to his sleeve. “Are you? Well, that’s quite alright.” Rose looked back up at him and he gave her a smile, and that left her feeling just a bit wobbly.
The music stopped, and she still heard a smile in Jack’s voice. “Hey, Doc, want to take over for me?”
Dancing?, Rose wondered, a bit wildly. Her mind’s eye allowed her to imagine this Doctor waltzing around the room with her, then around a ballroom on some faraway world, bathed in moonlight while the fabric of a crimson gown swirled around her legs, and then around the console of the TARDIS while the Old Girl hummed approvingly in the back of their minds.
“I’ve got to get cleaned up and head into London,” Jack continued, bursting into her thoughts as if he had no idea at all her mind had run away with her. Rude. “I’m conducting interviews for Torchwood this afternoon and tomorrow.”
“I’d love to help paint. If that’s alright with Rose.”
He looked down at her and she saw the searching look in his eyes. This was about much more than painting, she realized. She’d not been completely alone with him for more than a few minutes since his regeneration, except during their talk the night before. Someone, usually Jack, had always been within shouting distance. She’d be on her own this time, and not for just a few hours. This would be a couple of days.
She swallowed nervously, but didn’t take her eyes off of his. “Yeah, s’alright with me.”
“Excellent,” he chuffed. “Molto bene!” He released her then, and unbuttoned his jacket, looking up at Jack. “Should probably take this off, then, if I’m to be painting, hmm? I know it’s already got paint on it, but...well, allows for freer range of movement, doesn’t it? Suppose I know more about painting than the defrocked captain here, anyway,” he winked at Rose and she felt a blush staining her cheeks. “Considering I spent time with Leonardo da Vinci in his studio. Ah, old Len. He was a randy old sod. Would’ve given you a run for your money, Jack. You two would have got on like houses. Probably best you never meet, truth be told.” The Doctor finished unbuttoning and shrugged out of his jacket.
Rose nodded and swallowed hard when she saw the tie come off, too. This was ridiculous. She’d seen her other Doctor in nothing but a jumper rather often; the Doctor would frequently shed his leather jacket most of the time it was just the three of them around the TARDIS. He’d also taken to lounging in the library in his pajama pants and vest top, even with Jack there. She’d seen him in nothing more often than she could count once they started sharing a bedroom, for heaven’s sake. Nearly every night. She was well-used to the Doctor in various states of undress. Why should the sight of this Doctor’s arms be giving her palpitations?
And yet, somehow, it was. And now - Oh, my giddy aunt, he’s rolling his sleeves up.
Jack caught her looking and smirked. She put her tongue out at him. He just laughed at her. Thankfully, the Doctor didn’t seem to notice their exchange.
“Have fun, you two!” Jack said. “And don’t wait up tomorrow, either! May be a couple days, if I can find some trouble to get into!” he called out over his shoulder.
Rose blushed and looked over at the Doctor. She was gratified to see that he was blushing, just a bit, as well.
“So!” He said once Jack was gone, clapping his hands together and surveying the room. “What are we doing here? What’s the plan? What are my directions? I am at your service, Rose Tyler.”
She felt flustered. What were they doing in here? Painting. Yes. Why? What colors? Oh, that’s right. The girls’ room!
Good Lord, Tyler, get a grip on yourself, she chastised herself. The girls squirmed.
“Pink below the chair rail, grey above it, the trim is bright white.”
He looked around the room again, then walked over to grab a brush. “Why are you painting? Or ‘we’. I suppose it’s ‘we’ now, isn’t it, now that I’ve joined you? Of course, you and Jack were in here working before I came along, so when speaking of you and Jack as a plural we would revert back to ‘you’, only we would be using what they call the ‘royal you’ in that case, wouldn’t we? English is such a fiddly little language. Doesn’t matter what you call it, I suppose, the important thing is that you have help, isn’t it? Wouldn’t want to leave you to do a job such as this all by yourself, Rose Tyler! But back to my original question: Why don’t you hire someone to do it?”
Rose shook her head with a little grin. That mouth of his was going to take a bit of getting used to. “That was my plan, yeah, but Mum made me feel guilty about spending so much money. And she’s right, there’s no sense in spending money when I could do the job myself. Plus, she pointed out that the exercise would be good for me.”
“Pah,” he protested. “The money is virtually unlimited, you know that, right? It is. In addition to the savings from all those years with UNIT, there’s the psychic credit card at your disposal as well. So you see, Rose? You don’t ever have to worry about funds. And while a little exercise never hurts anyone, you certainly don’t need any extra workouts, Rose. You’re looking quite fit.” He winked.
“You and your flattery,” she teased him back, trying to ignore the fluttering in her chest and the blushing on her cheeks. “I am bringing in a professional for the finishing touches. This is just the background.”
“Finishing touches?” He sounded genuinely curious. “What might those be?”
She gave him a tongue-touched grin. “You’ll have to wait and see.”
His eyes shuttered for a moment but he pouted a little and she smiled to herself. Seemed he hated waiting for surprises in this body, too. It was always a bit of a thrill for her, knowing something he didn’t.
After a second, he seemed to have pulled himself out of his little sulk and moved onto another topic: “Pink and grey? Isn’t that a bit of an unusual color palate? Grey is a non-traditional color for human girls in the twenty-first century, if I remember correctly. Granted, these are very soft colors...”
“Not really,” she said, unconcerned, going back to the window to paint around it. “It’s very stylish these days.”
He gave her a cheeky grin. “Ah,” he said. “And you, Rose Tyler, are very stylish.”
She thought of the vest top and shorts she was wearing - anything but stylish - and gave him a shy smile, feeling her cheeks pinken. “You tryin’ to butter my parsnips?”
He pretended to look affronted. “Moi? Never say so. I like to think I’m above such boorish and childish shenanig...oh, alright. Maybe a little. Just a tiny bit of butter. Is it working?”
Rose giggled in spite of herself, and he gave her a brilliant smile.
When she turned back to paint around the window, she shoved away the memory of her former Doctor’s smile and how different it was. This was now, that smile was gone, and decided she rather liked that smile she’d just had directed at her. Perhaps she would even like to see more of it.
She’d just dipped her brush in grey and started edging around the blue tape when the Doctor came up behind her. “May I?”
She rolled her eyes with a smile. “You’re going to help me no matter what I say, aren’t you?”
“See? This time to learn each other is a bit redundant. You know me so well already.”
He brought his body up behind hers, not quite touching but close enough that his proximity gave Rose gooseflesh. He put his hand over hers on the brush and she felt a thrill all the way up her arm until it quivered in her belly...and lower. The babies squirmed, and she sent them a playful, mental, furrowed brow. Just whose side are you on, anyway?
They kicked and Rose sighed inwardly. It was going to be a constant three-against-one battle in her life from now on, she knew. They were little Daddy’s girls already.
“You’re not showing me anything I wasn’t already doing,” she said after a few strokes of the brush, hoping the breathlessness in her voice came across as ‘exasperated’ and not ‘flustered’. There was a fine line.
“I know. You were doing everything correctly,” he said with a simple, maddening shrug. “I just wanted to be closer to you.” She heard, rather than saw, the smirk in his voice. “Worked, too.”
She gave a little squeak of outrage and turned to face him. He had the audacity to be grinning, then he winked at her, and of all things - of all the bloody things he could do - he took the paintbrush out of her hand and painted a quick, grey smiley face on her vest-covered bump.
Rose looked down at her belly, her mouth opened into a perfectly round ‘o’ of shock, and then back up at the Doctor who had dropped the brush onto a nearby tray, put his hands in his pockets and was bouncing on the balls of his feet, beaming proudly.
“I can’t believe you did that.”
He ducked his head to indicate his artwork. “The girls are smiling. See, Rose?”
“I can not believe you just did that,” she repeated, torn between outrage and amusement, schooling her face not to show the latter.
He knew her better than that. “Did what?” he asked innocently. “Made the girls smile? Really, Rose, isn’t that what I’m supposed to do?”
“You’ll pay for that.” Rose took a step forward, reaching for a roller in pink paint as she advanced.
“Oh, no,” he held his hands up as he stepped back. “There’s no need for that. Vengeance solves nothing, Rose Tyler.”
“It’s so satisfying, though,” she gave him a predatory grin, the wet paint on her shirt sticking to her tummy.
“Now, let’s be reasonable…” he backpedaled.
“But the girls are smiling, you know,” she taunted. “They like the idea of this.”
“I don’t think this is what they-”
She had him against a wall before he could dart to the side, and rolled the pink paint all the way down his front, from his unbuttoned collar to his knees. Rose laughed at his face, all screwed up from the sticky, cold feeling, and then laughed harder when he peeled himself away from the still-tacky wall he’d pressed himself against and turned around, trying to see the grey splotches on the back of his shirt and pink splotches on the backs of his legs.
“Now how is that fair!?” he demanded, all wounded dignity and furrowed brow. “One little smiley face to make the women in my life happy and I get painted like a sacrifice on Guuptl!”
Rose shrugged one shoulder, smirking. “Shouldn’t have started anything with me, I suppose,” she said and turned away.
She’d only taken a step or two back towards her work when something wet struck her back and hair. She froze, mid-stride, and reached up to touch the back of her head. Bringing her hand around to look at it, she saw white paint.
“You didn’t,” she turned around to the Doctor, seeing his fingers dripping white. “Tell me you didn’t just flick paint at me.”
“Shouldn’t have started anything with me, I suppose,” he parroted back at her with a mischievous grin.
Rose didn’t bother to take the time to think before she scooped her hand into the can of paint beside her and plopped it on top of his perfectly-coiffed head with a very satisfying squelching sound. His squawk of indignation was beautiful, she decided.
There were rivulets of pink paint running down his nose and beside his twinkling eyes when he told her with a devilish twinkle in his eye and a lopsided smirk, “I hope you know, this means war.”
Ten minutes later, with their daughters’ room resembling a pink, grey and white Jackson Pollack painting much more than a nursery, the combatants called a truce and decided to call professional painters (and carpet cleaners) to come out the next day after all.
Rose stood in her shower a short while later, washing away the faint-but-still-visible remnants of the smiley face that had started the entire silly little fight and lay her hands over it, smiling fondly.
Perhaps this Doctor wasn’t so different after all. Mischief and charm, enthusiasm and enchantment. She, herself, couldn’t help but find herself charmed and enchanted by him.
Maybe that was okay.
~*~O~*~
Friday, August 31, 2007
Jack had not made it back to the manor by the time tea time rolled around the next day - or the next - and Rose found that she wasn’t all that upset by that. She had even been a little amused when she heard that Jack would be staying with her mother, given that her mother only had two bedrooms and nothing was mentioned about Jack sleeping on the couch. She’d just rolled her eyes and tried to ignore the implications of Jack having her old room to himself while Pete was staying in the same apartment.
Even if the flat would be crowded, she doubted Jack’d stay there the whole time. Rose guessed that he’d probably come rolling into the driveway on Monday, after a long, debauched weekend. The poor sod had been cooped up with her and the Doctor’s domestics for a while. She figured he probably deserved to let his hair down, so to speak. She just hoped he didn’t get into too much trouble this time. It would be a lot more difficult to stage a jailbreak when they couldn’t fly away from the planet straight away.
The Doctor had been giving Rose a good deal of space, as she’d initially requested. When he was around, he was charming and they had a wonderful time. They did some of the things they’d done together before they became a proper couple. They talked, they laughed, and she’d found herself becoming more and more comfortable with him.
She also found that she missed his company when he was on the TARDIS or doing whatever he was doing, and she discovered that she wouldn’t mind him being around her a bit more. In fact, she craved it.
The room painters had come earlier in the day to repair the damage to the babies’ room that she and the Doctor had done two days before, and she’d been sorry to see the evidence of their good time be erased. She’d stepped in the splattered room a couple of times since that day, looking around and smiling. It had made her want to create more good times.
When her family and friends had left, she’d thought she wanted to be alone, with maybe Jack for company. When she’d gone to talk to the Doctor in his workroom, she’d gone with the intention of telling him that she hated going back on her word, but she was going to have to take things glacially slow and she wanted to be alone more often than not.
The conversation hadn’t gone that way, and she’d been the one to direct it. Rose had realized that getting it all out felt good, and that she’d meant what she’d said - she was ready to heal. She’d thought that she’d wanted to be alone with maybe just Jack for occasional company. Now, though, she didn’t think she wanted to be alone. Or perhaps it was a bit more accurate to say that she did want to be alone...she just wanted to be alone with the Doctor.
Still, they did have issues to work out, and she knew that. Sometimes the Doctor said or did something that was so unlike the leather him she knew that Rose would recoil just a bit before settling herself back down. She still missed his northern accent, his brusque manner, his sardonic wit, the smell of his leather jacket. She was starting to realize that she always would.
But this new Doctor was still the same, for the most part. She didn’t need the reassurance of their bond to know that...she sensed it without feeling the blue of his presence in her mind. On the couple of rare occasions that they’d touched, both had remained carefully shielded - she to protect her fragile emotions, and she suspected he remained guarded for her protection as well. There’d been no emotional telepathic exchange since the night he regenerated, and Rose felt her bond yearning for him.
She couldn’t deny an attraction to him. She was drawn to the ‘Doctor’ in him, naturally, but she was equally drawn to the ‘new packaging’: tall and lean, tousled hair and espresso eyes, tight suits and converse, shy smiles and furtive glances.
She wanted more time with him, and that emotional part of her warred with the logical side of her that said she was doing the right thing and she should continue to take it slow, that it was too soon for a trust fall.
Rose chose to listen to her logical nature...for the time being.
~*~O~*~
Rose was standing in front of the open refrigerator, pondering what to eat and wondering if she had the nerve to invite him to have dinner with her. As she shoved cartons and ingredients around on the cold, glass shelves, she decided to just take her time tonight, to wait and see if he would show up on his own. She didn’t think she was quite ready to seek him out. Not just yet. Perhaps she would be, soon. Perhaps very soon.
She hoped he would show up tonight on his own.
But when she started setting out the ingredients to make an easy dinner, he hadn’t come around. Disappointed, she resigned herself to putting them back and pulled out a can of something quick and ready-made. There was no point in making a fancy meal just for herself. Well, herself and the babies, she thought with a wry little smile. I guess I am eating for three. That would be justification enough for a spectacular dinner every night, shouldn’t it? Of course it should!
Blimey, I think his gob is rubbing off on me, she thought with a little giggle.
“Hello,” she heard from behind her.
Rose spun around, surprised by the sound, and found the Doctor standing in the doorway. He looked a bit uncertain of his welcome, his smile a little less confident than normal and his hands in the pockets of his trousers, but Rose certainly didn’t mind him being there. Not at all.
He was wearing the brown today with the blue and brown swirly tie and white converse. She wasn’t sure which outfit she liked better.
“Hi,” she favored him with a smile, trying to ignore the flutters in her chest, and imagined she saw his own smile grow.
“May I join you for dinner?” he asked.
She didn’t even take time to think on it. She’d been wishing for it, hadn’t she? “I’d like that,” she said with a smile.
“Brilliant,” he beamed at her. “Were you cooking?”
“Um, no, I was going to, before I realized I was alone. So I decided to just heat up a can of ravioli or something.”
“Pish posh. Let me cook for you,” he said, coming into the kitchen, taking off his jacket.
“No, it’s okay, I can co-”
“Here, let me,” he took the can from her hands and turned to put it away. “What would you like? Greek? Japanese? Can’t have sushi, not while Smid- the babies are taking up residence. Good old British, maybe? Some Yorkshire pudding might be just the ticket, hmm? Oh! I know! Italian! I’ll make that ravioli, but make it authentically, even stuffing the fresh dough with the ingredients myself! Would you prefer cheese or meat?”
“I don’t mind-”
“Rose, please,” he said sincerely, looking at her with wide, disarming eyes. “There’s nothing else I can do for you right now. Please, let me do this?”
She just looked at him, taken aback for a minute. His eyes were wide, bottomless in their sincerity, and she felt, for the first time, what the last week and a half must have been like for him. If she’d missed him, thinking he was gone, what must it have been like for him, knowing she was right there the whole time but she wouldn't let him in, wouldn't let him protect her and…?
“Only if I can help you,” she said with a little smile, hoping her voice was not as wobbly as she felt.
“Oh, alright.” He pretended to be put out by the notion, but winked at her, then gave a little bouncing twirl towards the fridge with a clap of the hands. “Now! Ravioli. We’ll need cheese and tomatoes for sauce, a little wine - but not to drink, Rose Tyler!” He said with a wag of the finger, taking a break from pulling things out and placing them onto the counter.
“You cook?”
“Apparently so,” he said into the refrigerator, pulling out more ingredients and setting them out on the counter. “I’ve always had the knowledge but it seems that in this body, I have the skill to match.” He winked at her and she felt herself flush.
“That’s handy, I suppose.” She touched her tongue to the corner of her mouth, and didn’t miss the way his eyes followed it.
“Indeed it is.”
“So! What are we making?”
“Nothing spectacular. I thought I’d make a little lobster stuffed ravioli, since you wanted ravioli and it appears we have some shellfish, and maybe I’d saute some vegetables to go on the side.”
She made a clicking sound. “Sounds very fancy. You sure you can handle all of that?”
He waggled his eyebrows. “I’ll show you fancy, Rose Tyler.”
She giggled and blushed, then he set her to work making the pasta, showing her how to make a mound of flour with a well on top. They laughed together for just a moment about the resemblance to the volcano she’d been thought to be the goddess of on Tuifah, then added eggs and salt to mix them up. A few minutes later, she was happily kneading the dough when he called over to her.
“What are you doing?”
Rose gestured to the dough with doughy, floury hands as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “I’m kneading the dough.”
“There’s an easier way to do that, you know.”
She pushed out her lower lip and blew upwards, trying to clear her forehead of a wayward lock of hair. “And I’m sure you know exactly how to do it, yeah? Just like the other day when we painted?”
“Now, really,” he said, mock-wounded. “I try to sneak a little contact with you the once, and you get all suspicious of me and my motives for all time. Can you really blame me, Rose Tyler?”
“Well, yeah!” she laughed.
He laughed with her. “No, there actually is a better way this time. I promise. Cross my hearts.” The Doctor looked uncertain, all of the sudden. “I can show you, if you want…?”
She softened at his hesitant look. “Yeah, sure. Of course. I’d like to know, if you’d show me.”
He brightened at once. “Brilliant! Molto bene!”
Rose smiled back at him, but the smile faded into surprise when he came up behind her and wrapped his arms around hers to get to the dough in front of her, effectively caging her in a relaxed embrace. He leaned closer, his face near hers, his chin hovering over her shoulder. He maneuvered his hands until his palms were resting against the backs of her hands, then laced their fingers together and started pressing into the dough.
Every push and pull into the dough brought his torso into contact with her back, and Rose’s blood fizzed in her veins. She couldn’t take her eyes away from what he was doing, her heart was fluttering madly and he mind had gone utterly, blissfully blank.
“See?” he said, his breath ghosting against her cheek. “Very gentle movements. Easy touches. Slow. Don’t have to be rough to get what you want.” He turned his head to face her and she couldn’t help but turn hers to the side and face him as well.
Their noses nearly touched, their breaths mingled in the tiny space between them. Rose looked from his mouth, his full lower lip a scant couple of centimeters away, to his brown eyes right in front of hers and for a moment it was right...it would be so easy…she was hypnotized and she knew...oh she knew it was all over now, his eyes had decided the issue for her and it was now an only matter of when...
She felt his hips behind her. He wasn’t hard, not yet, but it would only take one motion from her, one little grinding motion, and he would be. She wondered just what this Doctor would feel like if she rocked her hips backward into him so she could find out.
She was sorely, insanely tempted to do just that.
The Doctor cleared his throat and drew his head back away from her, withdrawing his hands from the dough and around her. “Yes, well, I think the dough is ready to be put into the press,” he said, putting one still-floury hand into his pocket without thinking and running the other through his hair and catching the back of his neck.
Rose burst into giggles, bringing her own powder-covered hands to cover her mouth and he looked at her blankly until she pointed and he realized what he’d done. He stared at his hand dumbly for a moment, then pointed his eyes upwards as if he could see the white streak he’d put in his hair and shook his head. “Oh, Rose Tyler. The situations I get myself into for you.”
~*~O~*~
Sunday, September 2, 2007
It had been a very productive couple of days, the Doctor thought, in his campaign to win back the heart of his wife. They’d talked on Tuesday, had a glorious little fight with paint on Wednesday, they’d made and ate dinner together on Friday, and those had just been the highlights. Since Rose had sought him out in his workshop on Tuesday, they’d watched telly in the lounge or stargazed in his workshop together multiple times. A couple of times, there had been touching involved. Oh, nothing of the naughty sort, ta, but hands had brushed and he knew there was no way she could deny the jolt they both felt when that happened. He’d seen it in her eyes. It was all so thrilling and intimate. The Doctor was positively giddy with his success.
But now he stood outside the inner sanctum: his own bedroom. The bedroom he shared with his wife. Or, rather, he had until he’d regenerated. This him had only slept there for a scant few hours, and certainly not with her.
Oh, get your mind out of the gutter. That’s not what this is about.
The Doctor took two deep breaths outside of the door and paused before he knocked. He could do this. There was no reason he couldn’t do this. He only wanted to spend time with her before bed. They used to do this all the time. This was old hat for them. The-Doctor-And-Rose-Tyler. This was just another Something They Did, and had been for well over a year. There was no reason to be nervous about this. He could absolutely do this. It was his bedroom too, after all. He could do this.
He knocked, three quick bursts.
His knock was different, he realized. He didn’t used to knock this way.
He tried not to think about it, and hoped Rose wouldn’t, either.
Rose opened the door with an unmistakable smile, wearing her yoga pants and his old jumper, the maroon one she had favored on him. His hearts clenched a bit at the sight of it stretched across her rounded-but-still-fairly-small abdomen. She really did miss that him more than she talked about.
He babbled, “I was wondering if I might, well, if I might read to you. And the babies. You know, it may soothe them a bit. It’s never too early to start the little ones on the path to literacy. As you’re well aware, the classics must be preserved and passed on to the next generation. Plus, you and I had discussed doing the things we always did in the evenings, and I did read to you quite often just before be-”
Rose held up her hand, stopping his babble. Rather mercifully, he thought. “What classics?”
The Doctor held up the book in his hand. Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone.
She burst into laughter. “Must plan on reading for quite a while if you’re going to work your way through that,” she laughed.
“As long as it takes,” he said with a grin, but an underlying tone of seriousness.
Her laugh cycled down to a smile, and she opened the door wide enough for him to step inside. “C’mon in.”
He did, and she didn’t bother closing the door behind them.
He followed her to the couch beside the fireplace and had a seat in the spot he’d always occupied - before things went pinstriped nearly two weeks ago. He was disheartened when she sat at the opposite end of the couch, but didn’t remark on it. The Waiting Game, he reminded himself.
The Doctor peered at her belly from the expanse of the couch with a mock-stern expression and dared something he hadn’t tried since he regenerated. “Now, Moppet, Smidgen, this is a very important moment in your young lives, so you’ll want to pay close attention. I’m going to introduce you to a remarkable young man and his (arguably) even more remarkable friends. There are some things that will happen here that you may not understand just yet, but it’s a lovely story and you’re brilliant girls, so I don’t think we’ll have much of an issue, do you? No? I don’t think so either,” he answered himself. “Besides, Mummy and Daddy are right here, and we certainly won’t mind re-reading it and discussing the themes with you as you get older. So, without further ado, off we go!”
He opened the book and turned pages until he got to the beginning of the story. “Chapter One. The Boy Who Lived.” He cleared his throat. “Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much…”
When the Doctor got to “Chapter Four: The Keeper of the Keys,” Rose stood without a word and left the couch.
“Rose?” The Doctor put his finger in the book to mark his place. “Is everything alright?”
“Yeah, s’fine.” She dismissed him with an airy wave, walking towards the bed. “Go on, then. As you were.”
He eyed her suspiciously but continued reading, watching her from the corner of his eye. She pulled the pink blanket from the bottom of their bed and came back to the couch, and he nodded to himself mentally. Of course. She must have been cold. He should have lit the fire before he started to read, he chastised himself.
But she didn’t sit back where she had been. He paused in his reading when she sat down right beside him, picking his arm up, raising it, and sliding her body against his before she lowered his arm and let it curl around her body, resting his hand on her arm.
He was sure she could feel the pounding of his ecstatic hearts against the hand she rested on his chest. There was no way she couldn’t.
“Comfy?” he asked, going for nonchalance and failing miserably.
“Mmm,” she answered, settling herself in. “Keep reading.”
He did as she asked, but allowed his hand to roam a bit from the place she’d lay it, letting his fingertips trail on the wool-covered skin of her arm.
Her breathing became regular and slow when Mrs. Weasley helped show Harry how to get onto Platform 9 ¾, but she protested when he tried to stop reading at that point. She didn’t, however, seem to notice when his voice tapered off to nothing after the Sorting Hat’s song.
The Doctor sat there for a few moments, letting his wife sleep against him, knowing she was almost certainly drooling on him a bit, and marveling at his good fortune. She hadn’t fully accepted him yet. He knew it and was doing his best to deal with it. But he also knew that she was well on her way, and he couldn’t be happier. He certainly deserved the doghouse treatment for now, and he’d take it. But things seemed to be on an upswing, and he could endure. The prize was worth the perils.
He just wished she’d call him ‘Doctor’.
He silently stroked her arm for a few more minutes, waiting until she was fully asleep, then he lifted her gently - ever so gently - into his arms and carried her to their bed. He maneuvered her until he was able to get her under the covers and comfortable. He bent down and placed a soft kiss on her brow, then another on the swell of her belly. He was taking liberties and he knew it, but couldn’t bring himself to care. The three women he loved more than his next breath were there in front of him, sleeping, and he wanted nothing more than to communicate his love to them.
He kissed her again, just because he could, and left them to slumber in peace.
Notes:
I'm still hunting for baby girl names. I've got the first names almost certainly picked out, but middle names are important, too!
When TRF&E read the next chapter, she said it was "bloody exciting!", which was pretty much the best compliment she could have given me. So there's a little teaser for you. <3
Chapter 30: London
Summary:
The Doctor and Rose continue to progress in their relationship during a trip to London, and run into people from their past - friend and foe alike.
Notes:
This is a long one, guys. Lots to cover in one day. :)
~In this chapter, there is a scene with strong language and...how do I put this... There is some mild violence that will more than likely make you pump your fist into the air.
~Please forgive me my inconsistent spelling of 'Shareen'. I'm fairly certain I've been spelling it wrong until now...Lord knows I have in my other fics.
~You guys astound me with your comments and kudos, and the number of hits on this fic is mind-blowing to me. I never would have believed it. Thank you so, so, so, so much.
~And thanks to Tenroseforeverandever for being the best beta ever. <3
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Tuesday, September 5, 2007
*~*~*Twenty-Six Weeks*~*~*
Tuesday morning found the Doctor and Rose in their Range Rover, headed to London. When setting up her online account with the baby superstore, Rose had set her mum’s flat as her shipping address, since they’d been staying there at the time. She’d forgotten to change it when she and the Doctor had moved into their own house, so the parcel she’d ordered had gone straight to Jackie’s flat and, since Rose wanted to go shopping anyway, they were on their way to London.
Not that the Doctor seemed to mind. He’d been downright cheery when she’d suggested a trip to town, grabbing the keys to the Range Rover and offering his arm in a dashing and gallant fashion.
Jack had come back home on Monday, and he had, indeed, had a wild weekend. The Doctor had made dinner and Rose listened with amusement, as she always did, while Jack told them a tale of a pub crawl that ended with him naked and running away from danger - as his stories so often did. He had other stories, too...the kinds of stories that the Doctor tended to tune out but Rose took great interest in. Stories of Mickey and Martha going to dinner and a film, and her mum and Pete canoodling. And there was the name of a new hire at Torchwood, Ianto, sprinkled liberally into conversation as well...
They had invited Jack to London, but he had decided to stay back and recuperate from his wild weekend. Rose was both sorry and glad...she loved when Jack was around, but she had only spent time with the Doctor at home. It’d be nice to see what he was like in the big, wide world.
For now he sat in the driver’s seat, smiling as if he had the world on a string.
It didn’t sit well with Rose. She didn’t know this new Doctor well enough to be able to tell when he was hiding something, but she suspected he was. She suspected he was overacting.
“Are you alright?”
“Me?”
“Who else?” She said with a grin.
“‘Course I’m alright. I’m always alright.”
There you have it, Rose. That’s the tell.
“Tell me what’s wrong. Out with it.”
His reaction was almost comical. He looked away from the road towards her, his face a picture of shock, his mouth in an ‘o’, then looked back at the road. He made a little squawk of protest, then repeated the gesture.
“I am!” He objected, his voice higher than normal. “I’m perfectly fine!”
“The more you tell me you’re fine, the less I believe you.” He opened his mouth again, but closed it when she spoke. “Just tell me so we can talk about it, yeah? I worry about you.”
“Do you really?” He asked, his voice softer and quieter.
“Of course I do.”
“Well, that makes it a bit better, just that,” he said, shooting her a quick smile.
Rose was a little hurt. “Are you under the impression that I don’t care about you?”
“No, no. Nothing like that. It’s just all...it’s rather jumbled up, to tell the truth,” he answered.
“Well,” Rose began, “Sometimes, I find that the best way to get my thoughts out is just to spill them. You’ve been on the receiving end of that more than once.”
He smiled. “That I have.”
“Go on then.” She used the side of her hand to nudge his leg, and he caught her pinky, linking it with his own and bringing them down on the armrest between them.
She didn’t want to admit out loud just what that minor little touch did to her insides, what it had been doing to her every time they touched for the last week. Rose looked down to where her little finger was looped through his, and realized that the rest of her hand envied that finger. As did several other parts of her body.
No, Rose. Down, girl.
The Doctor sighed heavily without looking at her. “I suppose...I suppose I just wonder why you’re here, sometimes. And I don’t just mean here, now, obviously you’re in the car because we’re going to London and making a day of it,” he said and she bit back a grin. “I meant on a larger scale. It’s something I’ve pondered for quite a long time, actually. Since well before I regenerated. Since...well...since not long after you started traveling with me.”
“You’ve been wondering why I was around since just after you brought me aboard?”
“Yes. Well, no, I mean, not like that,” he stammered, his pinky sliding over and claiming two more fingers for itself, then his ring and middle finger loosely joining with hers. She decided she’d like to fluster him more if it earned her more touch, then chastised herself.
“It’s just…” he went on, then stopped, and Rose waited him out. He ran his fingers lightly across hers, seeming to gather his thoughts, then he spoke. “I just wonder what you see in me sometimes, is all. And that’s a rhetorical question,” he hastened to add. “I don’t need you to answer. Don’t want you to answer. You’re here, and that’s enough.” The fingers linked with hers tightened just a little. “I just don’t always understand why.”
Rose looked over at him and contemplated for a minute. He didn’t look at her - his eyes were trained on the road - but he looked thoughtful. Introspective. He let go of her hand to flick the turn signal and she pulled her hand back into her lap, turning back, away from him, fiddling with her ring.
He’d said he didn’t need an answer, didn’t want one, but Rose wanted to answer him. She wanted to assure the Doctor of all the reasons she was with him, would never leave him. Could she do it?
She didn’t get a chance to find out.
“So! Jack seemed very keen on this Ianto bloke, didn’t he?”, the Doctor said.
Rose gaped at him, and he gave her a cheeky grin. “Eh? You thought I wasn’t paying attention, didn’t you? Well I’ll have you know, Rose Tyler, that I never miss a trick. Very clever, me. Brilliant, in fact.”
“Oh, you’re something, alright,” she grumbled, then softened the blow by sticking her tongue between her teeth when he looked over at her.
~*~O~*~
The Doctor had spent a great deal of time debating about whether to reach over and grab Rose’s hand in the car, and in the end, he’d given in to his screaming instinct. He still kept himself carefully mentally shielded and noticed that she did, too. And that was fine, but just the touch of her...the feel of her skin against his...it was a balm that he needed like air.
He didn’t, however, press his luck when they parked the car and started down the block towards the restaurant where they were scheduled to meet Jackie and Pete for lunch. Rose seemed happy to be there with him, and he wanted to keep her happy. Forcing his attentions on her when she wasn’t ready for them would only create an uncomfortable atmosphere, and he didn’t want that to mar what would likely, otherwise, be a brilliant day. So he just jammed his hands in his pockets as he walked along beside her. The two of them fell into an easy step together, laughing about something or other, nothing important.
He felt his hearts stutter when Rose took the seat he held out for her, smiling at him with her tongue touched to the corner of her mouth. This was the second time she’d looked at him like that in less than an hour. The Doctor would gladly give anything if she’d just keep looking at him like that forever. It was the smile he knew was only for him, and his hearts sang every time that little pink tongue made an appearance.
“Doctor!” The unwelcome voice of his mother-in-law broke into his pleasant little reverie. “Are ya just gonna stand there an’ gape at Rose all day, or are ya gonna sit down so we can order?” She asked, settling into her own seat. Pete was sitting down beside her, dutifully pressing his lips together to hide a smile. Rose’s cheeks were pinkening.
“Er, right,” he said, backing into his own chair.
“So!” Pete said, picking the menu up and looking at it, “how was the drive up?”
“Was nice,” Rose replied, sounding disinterested.
“Mm. Yes. Lovely,” the Doctor agreed.
“Himself’s a better driver in a car than a TARDIS, then?” Jackie raised her eyebrow and baited the hook.
The Doctor bit. “Oi!”
Rose reached over and patted him on the knee, and he instantly settled into a scowl, but put his own hand over hers to capture it. She darted her eyes at him but he just gave her a sly look, squeezing her hand and releasing it so that it was lying loosely beneath his.
Your move, Rose Tyler, he thought to himself.
Her hand stayed beneath his, on top of his knee, and his hearts danced a samba.
“So you’re going to sit there and say that you missed by an entire year, but you’re not a rubbish driver?” Jackie challenged.
“You brought her back a year late?” Pete asked, incredulous.
The Doctor scowled, but Rose spoke up to defend him. “The Doctor is a perfectly capable driver, Mum.”
“M’better than ‘capable’,” he muttered, although his grumpiness was was all an act, now. Rose was touching him, holding his hand. “M’a stellar driver. Brilliant, really.”
“‘Course you are, dear,” Rose said, giving him a loyal smile and squeeze. Then she removed her hand. He fought the urge to pout.
Jackie made a snorting sound, but was smiling to herself. Pete just shook his head a bit, as if trying to process the strangeness of his new ‘family’.
“Rose!?”
The Doctor’s head snapped up to find a young woman in a server’s uniform setting a tray down on nearby table and rushing towards their table with a huge smile.
“Shareen!” Rose pulled her hand away from the Doctor and stood, coming around him to wrap her arms around the dark-haired girl, smiling and laughing.
“Where’ve you been? I haven’t heard from you... thought you were staying in town?” Shareen asked.
“I am! Well, mostly in town. We’ve got a home, in Kent. Took us a bit to get it renovated and move in.”
“Kent, eh?” Shareen cocked an eyebrow.
“Oh, stop,” Rose blushed and swatted at Shareen. “What about you! I thought you were working over in South London!”
“I was!” Shareen chirped. “But m’uncle has a flat not far from here and saw the ‘help wanted’ sign. I didn’t think I’d get hired, swanky place like this, but here I am! Speaking of swanky, look at you! You’re the one who belongs here! Gone high-class, you have,” Shareen accused with a smile. She raised her hand and twirled Rose, taking in the eyelet lace, empire waist sundress that Rose was wearing. “Get you, Posh Spice.”
The Doctor rather thought that Rose had always been high-class, but he didn’t say anything.
“You’re mad,” Rose smiled. “Ain’t changed a bit, me.”
Shareen gestured down to her belly. “Well, you’ve changed a bit...”
Rose laughed, too. “Well, yeah, a bit.”
Apparently tired of being forgotten, Jackie spoke up. “Hello, Shareen.”
Shareen seemed to remember that she wasn’t just having a catch-up with an old mate, but her surprised look quickly gave way to a smile when she reached over and grabbed the tray she’d abandoned and pulled out a pen while Rose sat down.
“Hello, Mrs. Tyler. My my, you and Rose are in quite some handsome company today!” Shareen winked at Pete. “Who are your friends, Rose?” Shareen asked.
Jackie frowned at Shareen for winking at her bloke, but covered it by enthusiastically introducing him. “This ‘ere’s Pete.”
Shareen raised her eyebrows at Rose significantly. “Pete? Lovely name.”
“Like my dad, yeah,” Rose nodded slowly, and Shareen seemed satisfied by the exchange, whatever it had meant to the two of them. The Doctor decided he’d like to hear more about Rose’s friendship with this girl; if the two communicated so easily without words, they must have been quite close. The Doctor couldn’t help but think that he’d probably like someone who Rose cared about so much, and she could use more people like that in her life.
Then again, there was Mickey, so…
Jackie prattled a bit with Shareen, talking about Pete and his big, important job, Rose and the babies, but the Doctor tuned her out. Instead, he brooded.
What would Rose say about him? How would she describe him? He dreaded Rose being put on the spot like that, but he wanted to know what she would say about him very, very badly. There was no question that before he regenerated, Rose would have introduced him to this girl as her husband. She’d been proud of him, then. What about now?
He braced himself to be referred to as her ‘travelling companion’ or something equally dismissive, and winced when he realized just how many times he had done that to her.
“And who is this fella? Is this your fabled Doctor?” Shareen asked, with a nod of the head towards him.
The Doctor’s hearts stuttered and his respiratory bypass kicked in.
Rose’s hand slipped into his, breaking him of his thoughts, and her fingers laced with his. “This,” she said, drawing his eyes towards hers, “is my husband. The Doctor.”
Two weeks before, the Doctor had felt a dark dread steal over him soon as Jackie mentioned ‘Grampa Prentice’ coming to visit, and he’d never quite shaken it. There had been a glimmer of hope here, a ray of excitement there, but nothing had shoved away the mantle of anxiety that had draped itself across his shoulders and settled there when Jackie had called them into the kitchen to meet the ghostly visitor. In that time, he’d dealt with the Daleks and cybermen, his own regeneration, unwanted houseguests, and the worst of all of it - the stark terror he felt when dealing with Rose’s rejection of his new body and the fear that she wouldn’t stay with him.
It’d been thirteen days, twenty-two hours, and forty-three minutes since the chain of events that led to him losing his last life had been set into motion, and everything had changed. He’d been deeply unsettled (at best) ever since.
The Doctor felt that all of that anxiety, all of that fear, fall away, letting light and fresh air reach his starving soul at the same time Rose’s fingers laced with his and she uttered those precious words.
“Yes,” he said, and he was quite sure that the smile on his face is the brightest he’s smiled in thirteen days, twenty two hours, and forty-three minutes. “I’m the Doctor. Pleased to meet you, Shareen.”
~*~O~*~
It seemed that once the taboo of hand-holding had been broken, the Doctor was unwilling to give up the privilege.
Rose was grateful that the Doctor had been sitting on her left at lunch, because throughout the meal, he’d steadfastly refused to let go of her hand - from the moment she reached over to him and slipped her fingers between his. A month ago, when she was comfortable in the stability and familiarity of their love, she might have gently tugged it back so that she could have both hands free during the meal. She’d found that she really didn’t want to now.
Her hand had always fit perfectly in his and it still did, now. But now it felt as if the hand holding hers had been molded and shaped just for her. She dismissed the idea as ridiculous and just decided that she must be lucky.
They’d had some tentative touches - hands and fingers caressing then stealing away - and each one had left her heart galloping. This time it felt different - was different. This was the Doctor holding her hand in his and keeping it there, safe. Protected. His.
Shareen had loitered about the table chatting as much as she could during the lunch rush, and Rose resolved within herself to actually make an effort to truly reconnect with her old friend since she was going to be in town for such a long time. She didn’t want to just pay Shareen lip service and swan off. There was no reason for her not to have friends while she was here, even if those friends couldn’t know or understand some of the details of her life. Besides, Rose had missed having a girlfriend and as much as she loved Martha, Shareen and Rose had been friends for nearly their whole lives. Shareen had seen her at some of her worst times and some of her best. Martha was seeing the more adult, responsible, married-woman-and-mother Rose Tyler, but Shareen knew Rose’s roots. There was no substitute for time, really.
The Doctor finally let go of Rose’s hand when they finished their meal and said goodbye to Pete and Jackie on the pavement, sending them off to do whatever it was that they were going to do for the day while she and the Doctor went shopping. Pete raised his eyebrows at the Doctor when he heard this, but the Doctor seemed unconcerned about the unmanliness of this venture with Rose, bouncing a little on the balls of his feet and smiling.
This was a marked change from her leather Doctor, but in this, she didn’t question her good fortune. She just kissed her mum on the cheek, waved a final goodbye to her and Pete, and told them she’d see them that evening. Then she tucked her arm into the Doctor’s elbow and pulled him towards the car park before he could change his mind.
~*~O~*~
“Doctor,” Rose laughed, “you understand we don’t have to buy everything in the store that’s pink, don’t you?”
“Of course we don't,” he sniffed, tossing another pair of matching bibs into the buggy. These said ‘Daddy loves me’ as opposed to the ‘Daddy’s princess’ bibs he’d pitched in just a moment before. “Just the things that our girls will love. Ooh, look, Rose! They need this one, too!” He held up another bib, this one said, ’My mum is hotter than your mum.
Rose snorted a laugh, pulling it from his hands and putting it back on the shelf, ignoring his suddenly-protruding lower lip. “We don’t need that, Doctor.”
“You’re calling me Doctor,” he said with a brilliant, happy smile.
Rose blushed a bit. “Well? S’your name, isn’t it?”
“That it is, Rose Tyler. That it is.”
“But we still don’t need all these bibs just now. Especially one that describes me as being ‘hot’.”
“It’s true, though,” he protested.
She just rolled her eyes, flattered in spite of herself. “We won’t even need this stuff for months.”
“Oh, but it never hurts to be prepared, does it?” He put his hands into his pockets and followed her progress through the store. “They’ll need blankets, won’t they?”
“Well, yes…” Rose started.
“Brilliant! Be right back!” He turned on his heel and left, and Rose sighed on a smile. There was no telling what he’d come back with...but if he didn’t leave some things for her mother to buy, there would be hell to pay. Rose grinned, thinking of the showdown between the Doctor and Jackie over buying supplies and presents for the girls.
She sighed. It was going to be a constant uphill battle to keep Moppet and Smidgen from being spoiled rotten.
Then she blinked at herself in surprise when she realized that she’d just referred to the babies as ‘Moppet’ and ‘Smidgen’. Wouldn’t the Doctor be pleased by that!
I hope you know you’re loved, she sent to the girls. She felt contentment, but couldn’t distinguish between a feeling from the girls and her own feeling of well-being.
Rose turned instead to look at the playpens in front of her. The TARDIS would provide everything they needed while they were travelling, but they’d need things like this for the house.
“Hello, dear,” a voice said behind her, and Rose turned to look for the voice. A girl stood there, about Rose’s age, with brown hair and smiling eyes… and for some reason, she made Rose a little uneasy. “Can I help you find something?”
“No, ta,” she said, “m’husband just swanned off, I was waiting for him to come back.”
“Buying a playpen today?” The girl asked, and Rose looked at her nametag. Courtney, it read.
“Um, likely not today, the babies aren’t due for several months.”
“Oh, twins?” Courtney asked with raised eyebrows and a toothy smile, looking pointedly at Rose’s swollen stomach.
Rose’s hand covered her belly out of protective instinct. “Yeah. This winter.”
Courtney looked into the cart. “Girls?”
“S’right,” Rose said. For some reason she couldn’t explain, she felt the need to get away from this woman. Something about her felt off, felt dangerous. “If you’ll excuse me, I think I’ll go find my husband, see where he’s-”
“Rose! Look at this!” The Doctor crowed, coming around the corner. “Did you know that we can wear the babies? Isn’t that brilliant? Look at this! It’s called a wrap and you - oh, hello,” he said, coming to a stop a few feet away when he saw the shop assistant.
“Ah, you must be the husband I’ve been hearing about!” Courtney said with a smile.
“That’s right,” the Doctor said with an answering smile that didn’t quite meet his eyes. Rose noticed that he didn’t offer up his name.
“I’m Courtney,” she said, extending her hand to shake his.
The Doctor stepped forward to shake it, then inched closer to Rose. “The Doctor,” he said. “And I see you’ve met my lovely wife, Rose.” He put his arm around Rose’s waist. She felt distinctly uncomfortable - but not from the contact. The Doctor standing beside her, holding her, was actually the only soothing thing about this situation.
“I see that you’re interested in our baby wraps...I understand from your wife that you’ll be needing two of them this winter?”
“Oh, we don’t know just what we’ll need yet,” the Doctor said, his voice airy and dismissive.
“Perhaps you should look at some of our cold-weather gear, if you’re due towards the beginning of the cold months? Or are you due later in the winter? Or perhaps you’ll you be having the babies in a warmer climate?”
Rose felt the Doctor’s arm slide from around her waist and his hand sought hers out. For the first time in nearly two weeks, Rose felt an emotion from the Doctor. Mauve. Danger. Warning.
She’d been right. The Doctor sensed something wrong, too.
“I suspect we’ll be a bit busy. Won’t be going out much for a while once they’re born,” Rose hedged.
“Surely you’ll have to return to work?” Courtney smiled. “And you’ll need to take them somewhere. Or will you have a nanny?”
“We’re not sure yet,” the Doctor lied, his hand tightening around Rose’s.
“Perhaps some car seat covers. They come in pink, you know,” Courtney noted, looking towards the buggy full of pink clothing and gear.
The Doctor tugged on Rose’s hand, pulling her back towards the buggy, then replacing his arm around her waist protectively. “No, I think we’ve got enough for today. Thanks ever so much for your help, we’ll be on our way. Ta!”
The Doctor didn’t remove his arm from around her until they’d gotten sufficiently away from Courtney, which he confirmed with backward glances.
“Is she gone?” Rose asked in a low voice.
“I think so,” the Doctor confirmed, then seemed to notice that he had his arm around her. “Oh, ah, sorry about that. I just…”
“No, it’s okay,” she assured him, and stopped herself from asking him to do it again. “She gave me the creeps.”
“Me too,” he said, looking over his shoulder again. “And she’s not the first person I’ve had that same feeling about since we’ve been on Earth. All of them look at you...hungrily.”
Rose pulled a face. “Be fair, Doctor, you’re not much of a fan of anyone looking at me.”
He didn’t seem to notice her flirty tone. “No, this is different,” he insisted. “Something is off. This is the second or third time it’s happened.”
“Is something going on?” Rose asked, a little alarmed now.
“I don’t know,” he said, his voice low and a bit dark, “but I’m going to be a bit more careful about you from here on in.”
“Doctor -” she began.
He stopped her, looking into her eyes. Rose fought the jittery, excited feeling she got every time he did that. Now is not the time, Tyler.
“No, please, Rose. I’ve tried to give you your space and not be overbearing, even though my instinct is to hover all over you and make sure the babies are safe all the time. Since we’ve been here on Earth and staying in our home, it’s been a bit better. I’m having an easier time controlling it. I’m doing my absolute best not to smother you, and to give you all the freedom you deserve. But I’m scared, and that protective instinct has kicked back in now, full-force. I can only help it so much, alright? Please be patient with me.
“All I’m going to ask is that you be with someone when you’re out and about. Preferably me or Jack. And if someone makes you even a little uncomfortable, you get away from them as quickly as possible, alright?”
Rose sighed. It felt like a restriction on her freedom, although if she were being honest, it was all stuff she’d probably be doing anyway. Besides, things were just starting to stabilize with this new Doctor - just a little - and if this small concession (that really wouldn’t be a concession) would make him happy, she’d make it gladly. She knew that his instinct to protect her and the girls had been extremely strong before he regenerated, and she felt the danger from this woman, too - although she hadn’t sensed danger anywhere else. But if he needed to know she was safe for his own peace of mind, she couldn’t deny him that.
“Alright,” she agreed.
He looked relieved, and for just a second, Rose thought he was going to kiss her. Instead he beamed at her. “Molto bene, Rose Tyler! Now! Before we check out and go to buy you some clothes, let me tell you about these brilliant wraps…”
~*~O~*~
Cassandra watched the Doctor and Rose walk away through Courtney’s narrowed eyes. That exchange hadn’t gone as well as she’d hoped, although it was better than some of the others. After this little conversation, she now had most of the information she needed.
She knew where they lived.
She knew they were having twin girls.
She knew they were coming this winter.
Cassandra sighed dramatically, using Courtney’s lungs to further her performance. The Doctor and Rose were suspicious of her, and she wouldn't be able to use Courtney's body any longer. Time for a new one, she supposed. Courtney's body had been so...perky, though. She'd used it to its fullest advantage, and it was wonderful having men flirt with her and compete for her attention again. She really needed to find another Courtney, someone young and pretty and thin. It was simply unbearable being old and unattractive.
But Rose Tyler and her twin girls were going to fix that. Cassandra’s lips curled into a malicious smile. Oh yes. They would.
~*~O~*~
The Doctor was feeling quite chuffed as he parked the car in the carpark nearest Jackie’s flat and went around to Rose’s door. They’d had a lovely day so far, the incident with the sales associate notwithstanding. They’d smiled, they’d laughed, and there’d been more of that glorious handholding he was so fond of. The time he’d had his arm around her in the store had been brilliant...even if he’d initially done it for a less-than-brilliant reason, the contact was still lovely.
Rose took his hand and stepped out of the car with a smile. The two started walking towards Jackie’s flat hand-in-hand, looking like the happy couple the Doctor hoped they were becoming. The Doctor certainly felt nothing but happy. Hopeful. Every day, Rose seemed to accept him more and more, and that was all he could -
“Well would you look at that. If it isn’t Rose Tyler,” a man’s voice seemed to ooze from the shadows.
Rose’s hand inside his froze and her whole body stiffened. But she didn’t stop, she just kept walking, so the Doctor followed her lead.
“What’s your hurry, beautiful? Haven’t you missed me?”
“No. Go away,” she spat, still walking. The Doctor didn’t need her to put her shields down to sense the fear and anger rolling from her in waves. He didn’t know who this bloke was, calling his wife ‘beautiful’, but he didn’t like it at all. Anger stirred within him, low in his gut.
“Oh, don’t be like that, Rose. I just want to talk to my best girl.”
Best girl? The Doctor felt his anger growing. Rose ignored the man and kept walking. The bloke followed them.
“I heard you’d taken off with some daft old bastard to see the world or some rubbish. Looks like he got you up the duff, eh?”
“Don’t rise to his bait, Doctor,” Rose muttered, and it was only her quiet voice by his shoulder that stopped him from breaking the other man’s nose. He and Rose only had a block to go before they got to Bucknall House. He could be the bigger man that long, couldn’t he?
“Is this the unlucky sod saddled with your arse now, you sorry slag?”
“Go away, Jimmy, I’m warning you,” Rose said, and the Doctor could hear the anger in her voice, leaving her words to waver just a bit. Her hand tightened in his, and he squeezed it.
The penny dropped, and he tensed, ready to spring. “This is Jimmy?” The Doctor asked Rose in a low, quiet voice. The calm before the storm.
“Yes,” she muttered back. “Just leave him. He’s a piece of shit. We’re almost there,” she said.
He didn’t hear much of what she said, all of the pieces had fallen into place. Jimmy. Jimmy Stone.
This was the man who had scared Rose so badly. He’d hurt her, forced her to do things she didn’t want to. He’d stolen her dreams and in the end had put his hands on her.
Jimmy fucking Stone.
The Doctor pulled out his phone and pressed two buttons, then slipped it back in his pocket.
“Bit of a dandy, ain’t he, Rose? Heard he was a doctor. Don’t look like no doctor to me, looks like a cunt,” Jimmy mocked them. “Who the fuck wears plimsolls with a suit? You couldn’t do better than that? You’re not that hard on the eyes.”
The Doctor clenched his jaw and struggled against his desire to rip the younger man apart. Mustn’t lose your temper in front of Rose. Just get her to the flat safely. Almost there.
With his superior vision, he saw a door on the fourth floor half a block away open then close, and he nodded to himself.
“Why don’t you come back with me, beautiful? Be with a real man instead of this old codger. No way he can keep you happy like I kept you. Hell, I’ll even let you keep the kid if you really want.”
Rose’s shields weren’t holding, the strength of her anger overwhelming her defenses, and he could feel her fury through their linked hands. He tried to send back some calm, but he was struggling to find any within himself.
“I’m sure this twat won’t mind me taking you off his hands. You always were a slag, Rose, and weren’t even a very good lay. But I’ll take you back anyway. Your little bastard baby will be mine. No way to know who the father really is, is there, ya cunt?”
The Doctor had Jimmy pinned against the wall by the throat in less than a heartbeat. The Oncoming Storm swirled just behind his eyes, though he tried hard to fight it back.
“Rose asked me to leave it go,” the Doctor said through gritted teeth. “So I tried to be peaceable for her sake. But you just wouldn’t leave well enough alone, would you?”
“Doctor!” Rose called over his shoulder, but the Doctor wasn’t quite done.
“That’s my wife you’re disparaging and my children you’re calling bastards. I would recommend you not do that,” the Doctor said in a deadly, calm voice, noting Jimmy’s bugging eyes.
“Wife?” He managed to gasp.
“Yes, my wife. And because she’s here, and because she’s the most forgiving being in all of creation, I’m going to do what she would want me to and let you go. But I’m letting you go with a warning: if you ever talk to her, if you ever follow her, if you ever look at her, if you ever even think of her again, I will find you, and you will discover that I am a very, very powerful man. A powerful man who loves his wife and daughters very much and doesn’t mind destroying the people who mean them harm. I will do anything to protect Rose and my children. Anything. Do you understand me?”
Jimmy nodded, wide-eyed, and the Doctor released him, letting him fall to the ground in a gasping heap.
“Get out of here,” he said, disgusted, before walking over to put his arm around Rose’s waist so he could lead her away from the shit that was currently cowering on the ground just behind them.
Jimmy staggered to his feet, leaning heavily against the wall. “Should have taught you some respect all those years ago, you fucking slag,” he muttered, and Rose stopped.
“C’mon, Rose,” the Doctor encouraged, but Rose looked up at him with a sweet smile.
“Excuse me for a mo’, Doctor,” she said, then walked over to where Jimmy was panting against the wall.
The Doctor watched anxiously as Rose approached Jimmy, who was looking at her with narrowed eyes. Rose was still smiling serenely, but the Doctor was ready to spring at the first sign that Jimmy might put his hands on her again.
He didn’t get the chance.
“Look at me, Jimmy Stone.”
The younger man straightened himself before her, his eyes defiant.
Without preamble or warning, Rose drew back and kicked Jimmy in the groin and, in a deft little maneuver, bent her leg and brought it up just as Jimmy doubled over to curl around his crushed privates. The crunch of his nose against Rose’s knee was sickening, and the Doctor couldn’t help but wince a little through his wide smile when Jimmy fell to the ground, whimpering, with his face bleeding.
Heavy, running footsteps came up behind him and the Doctor heard Pete calling out. “Doctor! Rose! Are you alright? What happened?”
The Doctor turned around and saw Mickey, Pete, and Jake running towards him full-speed.
The Doctor just smiled. “Ran into a spot of a bother with an old acquaintance of Rose’s,” he explained, still smiling. His smile only grew when he felt Rose’s hand slide around his waist and she let her arm settle there. He draped his own arm around her shoulders. “It’s all fine now.”
“Jesus, Rose,” Mickey exclaimed, “you’re bleeding!”
Rose’s eyes widened and she stepped out of the Doctor’s embrace. She and the Doctor both looked down to the white eyelet sundress she’d been wearing which, sure enough, had a bit of blood spattered on the skirt. “Bugger,” Rose said. “That’ll be tough to get out, that will.”
“Are you alright?” Pete asked, sounding more afraid than the Doctor would have expected. “How did you get blood on your dress?”
“Who is that…?” Jake asked, looking at the bleeding, moaning heap on the ground.
“Jimmy Stone,” Mickey said in a low, dark voice, realization dawning in his narrowed, angry eyes.
“Yes, it is,” the Doctor confirmed. “We ran into him and he decided to, ah, make a nuisance of himself. But it’s alright now - Rose broke his nose.”
“You did what?!” Pete said.
“That’s my girl,” Mickey said proudly, putting his arm around Rose and hugging her tight. For once, the Doctor didn’t mind.
“Bastard had it coming,” Rose said, smiling in spite of herself.
“She’s brilliant, she is,” the Doctor agreed, wrapping his arm back around her shoulders.
“Doctor, I think I have some things I’d like to say to Jimmy,” Mickey said, his eyes stormy.
“Be my guest,” the Doctor gestured towards Jimmy graciously. “But I think I’ll be taking Rose up to Jackie’s flat now. Pete? Care to join?” Pete nodded, and they started walking towards Bucknall House.
“What about those two?” Pete asked, tossing his thumb over his shoulder, indicating Jake and Mickey.
“Oh, I think they’ll be having some words with Mr. Stone before they take out the trash. But don’t worry. They’re both much sweeter than my Rose, here,” he said, nuzzling into her hair.
“Oi!” She protested, elbowing him in the side.
The Doctor was very happy, indeed.
~*~O~*~
The Doctor had taken Rose’s hand when they got back onto the road towards home later that evening, entwining their fingers, and hadn’t released it. He didn’t intend to. He and Rose had made tremendous progress that day, and he wanted to savor what felt like an enormous victory to him.
But there was a topic that had been bothering him since he woke up from his regeneration, and he felt the need to address it. Now seemed like a good time. Seemed like the opportune time, actually.
“You haven’t asked me about my feet,” he said, stroking his thumb along hers.
Rose swiveled her head to look at him. “I’m sorry?”
“My feet. You haven’t asked me about them.”
She looked confused, giving him a cheeky raised eyebrow. “Well, they seem to be working, so I didn’t think-”
“No, not that,” he grinned, then sobered a bit. “You haven’t asked me whether or not they’re itchy.”
Rose was quiet for a minute, looking back out towards the road. “So you heard us talking? Me and Mum and Sarah Jane?”
“I did.”
She didn’t say anything else for a few minutes. Her silence made the Doctor anxious and he opened his mouth to do something...change the subject, maybe clarify himself...frankly, he had no idea what might come out of his gob.
Rose spoke before he had a chance. “Well? Go on, then. What’s the state of your feet, Doctor?”
He took a deep breath and tried to prepare himself for what he’d practiced saying. “Before the war, I was a different man than the one you met. I was the same man, of course, like we’ve discussed, but very different. The war changed me, fundamentally. I would never have considered settling down and having a family before. The very idea would have seemed ludicrous to me. I wanted to travel and have mad adventures. That’s all that would have mattered to me.”
“And now?”
“Now I’m on the other side of the Time War, and everything looks completely different. I’m the same man, but I’m very, very different than I was before the war began. I was granted a second chance, and I got it in you, Rose Tyler. Now we have these babies coming - a gift from Time itself - and there’s no way I’m running out on my good fortune.”
“So what are you saying, Doctor?”
He squeezed her hand a little. “I’m saying that your home is my home. If you want to stay on Earth until the girls are grown, that’s what we’ll do. I won’t tell you that I wouldn’t miss traveling or adventure, nor that I won’t miss it while we are here, but, well, there are plenty of adventures to be had here on Earth, aren’t there? Lots of aliens seem to want to make this planet their home. But I won’t be going back into the stars without you, and even then we’ll only go if you want to.
“My place is beside you. Beside you, not leading you. I want to be with you, and if you want to be here on Earth, then we’ll be here on Earth. Smithwood will be our home, and that will be that.”
“I don’t want you to make do, Doctor.”
“It wouldn’t be making do. Anything but. It’d be staying at home. You and these girls are everything I want: I’ll be where you are.”
Rose wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, and the Doctor took a chance, bringing the hand he still held to his lips and kissing it softly. “Home is with you, Rose Tyler. In the stars or in Kent. Your choice.”
“Both,” Rose said. “I rather think I’d like to have both.”
“Both it is, then,” he said with a smile.
Notes:
Jake and Mickey didn't beat Jimmy up any further. Mickey grabbed him by the front of the shirt and threatened him while Jake stood behind him looking menacing, then the two of them dumped the bastard into a dumpster, effectively 'taking out the trash'.
Mickey had intended to rough Jimmy up a bit more - God knows he deserved it - but Jake stopped him, pointing out that for a misogynist and abuser like Jimmy, the ultimate humiliation would be the fact that he got his ass kicked by a pregnant woman.
Chapter 31: Blossoms
Summary:
Rose surprises the Doctor as they inch towards greater intimacy.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
*~*~*Twenty-Seven Weeks*~*~*
They reclined together on the cushions of the Doctor’s workshop, staring up at the ceiling. Rose’s hand was cradled in his, his fingers stroking hers just because they could. He was relaxed, and contemplated letting himself drift off to sleep while she was near. He hadn’t slept since he regenerated - almost three weeks now - and he needed to do so soon. But he hadn’t lied when he told Rose that he didn’t sleep without her... had enormous difficulty doing so, actually.
Now, though, she was there...lying just beside him...he could sleep, just a little...
He have himself a mental shake. No. Their time together was entirely too precious to waste. No matter how comfortable he felt with her lying there beside him, holding his hand. She’d been spending more and more time with him in the last weeks, true, but every moment was still too valuable to waste on sleep. He’d try again after she went to bed.
They’d spent most of the last few days together, but nothing had progressed beyond the not-quite-casual touches they’d been sharing. The Doctor longed for more, yearned for more of her skin against his, but he could wait. He could. He knew he could. He was sure of it.
In the meantime, his thumb traced a long ellipse on the delicate skin inside her wrist, the softness tiding him over until he could touch more, could feel more.
They’d talked about all kinds of things over the last few days, and the Doctor tried to mention their life together and old adventures before he regenerated as often as he could. He wanted to underline the similarities between himself and his last body, the one she’d fallen for. He wanted her to be reassured that it had been him all of those wonderful times together. That the man in pinstripes lying beside her now, had once laid beside her in leather. The Doctor sensed that she still wasn’t a hundred percent convinced, and he wanted to comfort her as best he could.
They spoke of the past, the things they’d seen and done together, but they also talked of the here and now, and - sometimes - of the future. Those were the Doctor’s favorite conversations.
“I believe Jack may have met a bloke,” Rose said, a smile clear in her voice.
The Doctor scoffed. “Jack meets lots of blokes, that’s nothing new. But I have heard him mention one more than others.”
“I think this one is different. Jack doesn’t talk about him the way he talks about the others.”
“Ianto?”
“Yeah. I think he might like this one, I really do.”
“What has he said?”
“Not much. Nothing even remotely romantic or sexual, and that’s what makes me believe that he may fancy this bloke.”
The Doctor laughed outright. “You think he may fancy this bloke because he’s not talking about him as if he’s attracted to him?”
Rose swiveled her head around to look at him. “Now, Doctor. Would you ever talk about me the way Jack has talked about some of his conquests?”
That stopped his laughter. “Of course not,” he huffed.
“Well, there you go,” Rose said, smug, turning back to look at the ceiling.
The Doctor pondered for a few minutes, then said with his own smile: “So you think Jack’s caught domestics from us?”
Rose propped up on her elbows. “Caught domestics!? As if it’s a disease?”
“Of course it’s not a disease but, well, yeah! Jack’s not a ‘domestics' kind of bloke, is he? But if he’s interested in this Ianto…”
“You weren’t a ‘domestics kind of bloke', either, as I remember it. You were rather opposed to them, actually.”
“I learned better,” he sniffed.
Rose snorted and lay back down and the Doctor took her hand again without looking. She didn’t protest, and he let his thumb stroke hers.
“Maybe we could meet them for dinner next time we’re in London?” The Doctor asked. “Or Jack could bring him ‘round here?”
“I’d like to meet him,” Rose agreed. “Can you behave yourself if we do?”
“Now what’s that supposed to mean, Rose Tyler?”
“Just what I said. Can you meet and talk to Jack’s friend without being rude?”
“M’not rude!”
Rose turned her head and bored her eyes into his.
“Oh, alright. I’m a bit rude. Sometimes.”
“Can you behave if we meet Jack’s bloke?” she repeated.
He sighed, sounding very put-out. “I suppose. If I must.”
Rose giggled, and he smiled at the sound.
“So what are you learning about this new body?” Rose asked, her tone conversational.
“Hmm?” He was a bit distracted by the fact that her thumb was stroking his of its own volition.
“This new body,” she repeated. “What are you learning about it?”
“Oh, this and that,” he answered, still mostly focused on her thumb. It occurred to him that he should probably be paying more attention to her, and not just where they were touching. “I can cook now, as you’ve discovered.”
“Very well, too,” she agreed.
“My musical tastes seem just a bit different,” he mused. “It would appear that I rather like classic rock-n-roll.”
“Huh. I wouldn’t have taken you for a rock-n-roll type of bloke.”
“Well, I like everything, really,” he said, tracing his fingers along hers now, the idle touch soothing him. “Before this regeneration, I rather liked the blues.” He paused, his face twisted in thought. “Come to think of it, I do in this body, too. Maybe I should pull out my guitar and noodle around a bit.”
Rose scoffed. “You? Play guitar?”
“You sound surprised.”
“I am! Go ahead, pull the other one.”
“I’m not pulling your leg, Rose Tyler! I’m insulted at the very insinuation. Of course I can play guitar,” he protested. “Learned from Stevie Ray Vaughan himself.”
“Who is that?”
The Doctor looked at her, shocked. “Who is…? Honestly, Rose. What did you learn about growing up? Next you’ll tell me you don’t know who Aretha Franklin is? The Queen of Soul?”
“Nope, no idea.”
“Blimey,” he muttered, pressing a hand to his forehead, looking back at the ceiling. “My life has become a song.”
“What song is that?”
“Never mind,” he grumped. “You won’t have heard of it, either.”
She harrumphed a little, but he just smiled. It was fun to be bantering with her like this, the way they used to. She let go of his hand and pulled his arm away from his body a bit, scooting in under it so that she was curled into his side. He sighed, content, and nuzzled into her hair a bit with a bright smile she couldn’t see. She just made him so bloody happy.
“Anything else you’re discovering?” She wiggled around to make herself comfortable, and he accommodated her. “Besides your newfound affinity for tight trousers and hair product?”
“Oi!”
“M’just sayin,” she said with a grin, nuzzling into his chest a bit.
He closed his eyes and relished her closeness for a moment before he answered. “I seem to be a bit more scientifically-minded this go ‘round.”
“Does that mean no more Oncoming Tinkerer?”
“My, but you’re cheeky tonight,” he mock-chastised her. She craned her head to look up at him and gave him a glimpse of her tongue in the corner of her mouth. He fought the urge to try to catch it.
“No, so sorry for you, but I’m always going to be a tinkerer. Jackie’s telly and our toaster will forever be in jeopardy, Rose Tyler,” he teased. “But I am more inclined towards the sciences than I was in my last body. Which leads me to something I’ve wanted to ask you about...I’d like to do a few tests.”
“Tests? On who? Me?”
“Yes. I’d like to know just what exactly Bad Wolf changed about you, your physiology. What made you compatible enough that we could get pregnant and you could carry Time Lord babies.”
“Will it be dangerous?”
“Not at all for you. It’s just a basic scan and a blood draw.”
“What do you mean, ‘for me’?”
“Well,” he reached up with his free hand to tug his earlobe. “I’m 99.9% sure it’s safe for the babies. The blood draw certainly is, nothing to worry about there. As far as the scan goes...well, nothing is ever foolproof when it comes to a fetus, but I’m as certain as I can be. But I’d rather wait until after the babies are born to do the scan, though, just on that 0.1% chance of something going wrong.”
“Fine by me.”
“So you’re okay with a blood draw.”
“If you’re sure it’s safe.”
“I wouldn’t suggest it otherwise.”
“Why didn’t you do it before?”
He thought for a minute before he went on. “I was scared, to be honest. I have very high hopes for what these tests may show, and I was afraid that if I didn’t see what I expected to, I wouldn’t survive the disappointment. I just wanted to live for every moment and not worry about the future. Didn’t want to look a gift horse in the mouth and all of that. I’m the luckiest bloke alive, you know.”
“You’re not worried about bad news now? And please don’t refer to me as a ‘gift horse’ again, Doctor, particularly while I’m pregnant.”
He snorted and squeezed her a little in apology. “Noted. And of course I’m still a little worried. But with this new, more-scientific brain, I have a better idea of what I’m likely to find. I feel more confident about doing the testing. Besides,” he hesitated, suddenly feeling shy. “I’m a bit more curious and impatient this time around.”
He felt her smile against his chest. “Alright, then. If you feel good about it. Whenever you want. I trust you.”
“You do?”
“Yeah,” she said quietly.
The Doctor could have danced a jig, but he wouldn’t dare disturb a comfortable Rose on top of him. “Brilliant! That’s wonderful to hear, Rose Tyler! Molto bene!”
She giggled. “‘Molto bene’ is new for you.”
“Is that a bad thing?” He asked, suddenly self-conscious.
She shrugged against him. “No, not really. It’s just different.”
“Good different or bad different?” he pressed her.
“Just different. Takes a little getting used to.”
The Doctor stared up at the ceiling. The TARDIS was now showing them the solar system of Refis VI, six planets spinning around a small, orange sun.
“I’m getting more comfortable in my own skin,” the Doctor said after a minute.
Rose sighed against him, a happy sound. “I’m getting more comfortable with you in this skin, too.”
~*~O~*~
He came into the kitchen the next night, intending to dip into the marmalade before he went up to Rose’s room to read to her and the babies.
The Doctor didn’t quite understand all of the quirks in this new body.
He was very tactile. He wanted to touch and be touched often, much more than his last body had. He also seemed to want to taste everything, and although all of his senses were heightened by virtue of being a Time Lord, his strongest sense in this body seemed to be the sense of taste.
He also had a terrible sweet tooth this time around, and found himself indulging it more often than not.
He knew all too well, however, that if Rose caught him dipping his fingers into the marmalade again, he would be getting the Narrowed Eyes of Doom. So he figured a quick jaunt into the kitchen was in order while he was fairly certain she was getting ready for bed.
But Rose was there after all, and as much as he would have enjoyed a taste of marmalade, he was much more content just to observe her for a minute.
She was simply gorgeous. He’d always heard about pregnant women glowing, but Rose seemed radiant. Aside from the topic of his regeneration (and everything that surrounded it), he didn’t think he’d ever seen her happier. And seeing her happy made his own hearts soar.
Her belly was growing - although still not as large as it would be for a normal, human pregnancy - but as she approached her seventh month he knew that the growth would slow down quite a bit. She still had several more months to go, but she didn’t seem uncomfortable yet. He was glad for that, at least.
She hadn’t noticed him standing there yet, so he luxuriated in the sight of her for a bit. She popped a grape into her mouth and turned the page of the magazine she was looking at before eating another. The second grape proved to be the last one, so she balled up the paper towel they had been lying on and turned to throw it in the rubbish.
The Doctor stepped into the kitchen fully before he could catch her watching. “Late night snack?”
She jumped a little at the sound of his voice, but smiled. “I wanted some grapes.”
“Not bananas? Pity. As long as it’s not pears, I suppose.”
Rose giggled. “I’m glad you’re here. I have a surprise for you.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah. The painters came today, and the girls’ nursery is done.”
“It is? So soon?”
“Well, not done-done, but all the painting is. Would you like to see?”
The Doctor was much more interested in curling up with her in front of their fire and reading to her, but she was so excited that he didn’t have the heart to suggest that they wait.
“Go on, then. Show me.”
~*~O~*~
Rose had insisted that he close his eyes before they got to the door, and warned him against peeking. Her excitement was catching, and the Doctor found himself going along with her wishes - particularly when she took him by the hand and led him into the room.
“Still no peeking?”
“I’m not looking, Rose, I swear.”
She pulled him to the middle of the room and stopped him, turning him a little by the shoulders and angling him just so.
“Alright. You can look now.”
The Doctor opened his eyes to look around the room.
The walls were painted pink and grey, just as he and Rose had worked two weeks before, but a mural painter had been in since then and painted trees on the grey wall above the chair rail. A gauzy, shimmery cloth had been fashioned into hundreds of little pink-and-white flowers interspersed with a few green leaves covering the branches. The trees seemed to be blowing in an invisible breeze, and a few of the flowers seemed to be flying away, carried by that wind.
“They’re cherry trees,” Rose said, clearly excited. “Do you like it?”
“You decorated the babies’ room with cherry trees?” he asked, nonplussed.
Rose nodded happily, slipping her hand into his. “I thought it would be fitting, considering...well....considering Kyoto. Do you like it?”
“You painted their room to remember that night?”
She blushed. “Well, that’s where it all began, isn’t it?”
He didn’t think, he simply took a short step towards her, brought one hand to her face and caught her smile between his lips. Rose didn’t respond for a moment and panic threatened to overtake him, until he felt her hand at the back of his neck, her head tilted a little, she was kissing him back and thank gods.
The Doctor let go of the hand he’d been holding and slipped it around her waist, pulling her as close to him as the babies would allow. It wasn’t close enough, but she was never close enough for his liking. His lips slid against hers in slow, easy strokes. He wasn’t coaxing her to open for him, nor pleading for entry. This kiss was adoration, gratitude, devotion, love. He did his best to communicate all of these without words, using only his mouth and his hands. He noted that she was still shielded so he left his mental shields firmly up as well. Was probably for the best, anyway...he was nearly overcome with all of the emotions in his own blood, it was a better idea to stem the flow from him to her lest he overwhelm her. His fingers threaded through her hair with one hand and the other lay flat against her back, holding her close.
And oh, it was brilliant. It seemed like lifetimes since he’d had her in his arms and could kiss her the way she deserved, the way his hearts screamed for him to kiss her.
Her short nails scratched his scalp and he whimpered a little, in spite of himself. Her lips parted beneath his at the sound. The Doctor was no fool; he seized the opportunity to deepen the kiss and did so gladly. It was the kiss of lovers, the joining of two people who knew each other intimately and revelled that intimacy. There was no challenge, no demand, no battle. Only pleasure, love, and a little game of chase between his tongue and hers.
Rose pulled away from him, slowly, but he followed her, unwilling to let go of the contact just yet. He found himself kissing her smile and decided that that was just fine with him - knowing that he had brought that smile on her face was a heady feeling.
After a moment, she put her hands on his chest and gave him the most gentle of pushes, setting him back from her. He refused to let her out of his arms, though.
She kept her hands on his chest, the heat from her hands radiating through the layers of fabric and bringing warmth to the hearts they covered. She looked up at him from beneath her lashes, her brown eyes shining in the low light.
“Stay with me tonight? Not for...anything...you know...” she stammered, “...but, I just sleep better when you’re there.”
“Are you sure?” His voice was quiet, and he wasn’t sure he’d be able to hear her answer over the roaring in his ears.
He needn’t have worried, because she didn’t answer him with words. She just bit her lip and looked up at him, nodding.
The Doctor felt a swooping in his belly, but he nodded down at her. “Your wish is my command, Rose Tyler.”
~*~O~*~
They didn’t read, but the Doctor wasn’t sure he’d have been able to, anyway. He entirely too anxious to hold Rose to focus on words in a book. In just a few minutes, he’d have her in his arms again, snuggled close against him, and the knowledge that this was actually happening left him elated.
While Rose went through her nighttime routine in their ensuite, he debated for a while about what pajamas to put on, since he certainly couldn’t sleep nude. He was a new man, but would it be better for him to underline the similarities between himself and his former body, or downplay them? After a few minutes, he decided to dash down to the TARDIS and let her decide the matter for him. He’d put on whatever she laid out - which turned out to be a pair of plaid, flannel pajama pants and a vest top. Not all that different from the last body, then.
Returning to the room, he saw Rose sitting up in bed wearing a vest top of her own, pulling the duvet over herself. She wasn’t wearing one of his jumpers and for a moment, he was a bit hurt. But then she smiled at him, and how could he feel anything but joy when she looked at him like that?
Rose raised the corner of the duvet on his side of the bed and he didn’t wait - he went directly to her and climbed in. She rolled to her side away from him and he lay on his back with his hands across his belly, pondering his good fortune.
“What are you doing?” She asked.
He wasn’t sure how to react. “I’m lying here, with you.”
She sat up, muttering about what a plonker he was, and grabbed the hand farthest from her. Lying back down, she pulled his hand around her, draping his arm across her waist, over her belly and lacing their fingers together.
The Doctor rolled obediently, molding his body to hers and moving his free arm under her head, pillowing her. He was unable to resist the urge to bury his face in her neck and take a deep breath before kissing her there.
“How long has it been since you slept?”
The Doctor hesitated before answering. “Since that day.”
“The day you regenerated?”
He nodded.
“So three weeks?”
He nodded again. “How could you tell it’d been too long?”
“I just could,” she said. “I can’t explain it, I just knew you needed sleep.”
Of course she knew. She always knew, his clever Rose.
“Is that why I’m here?”
“No,” she said, settling herself more firmly against him. “You’re here because I wanted you with me. Because I’m ready for this. It’s not a reward or anything; I wouldn’t treat you like that. I’m just...I’m ready for you to be here.”
“I’m glad,” he said.
“Mmm. Me, too,” she said around a yawn.
“Sleep, Rose. I’ll be here when you wake up.”
“You’d better be,” she mumbled. Within minutes, he heard her breathing slow down and deepen.
He waited until he heard her snore softly before he whispered into her hair. “I love you, Rose Tyler.”
She stirred against him, muttering something unintelligible, and he’d take that for now.
Content and happy, holding the woman he loved and with his daughters growing in her belly, the Doctor fell asleep and dreamed of good things to come.
Notes:
This is similar to what I'm describing in the nursery.
This is the bedding.
This is what the 3D wall flowers look like.
Imagine that all of this is the color of the bedding.
I will owe someone a ficlet if they can tell me what song I'm making an oblique reference to.
Chapter 32: The Morning After
Summary:
The Doctor and Rose work out one last issue.
Notes:
This chapter is NSFW at the beginning, but it furthers the plot. If you would like to read an edited version or get a summary from me, you can find me at caedmonfaith.tumblr.com or facebook.com/bbamazeballs
There are chapters that just kind of flow out of me. There are chapters where I have to fight for every single word. And then there are chapters like this one, where tenroseforeverandever pretty much had to hold my hand and guide me through. She's the best, y'all, and this fic absolutely would not be happening if it weren't for her. It just wouldn't.
We're getting closer to the end, guys! There's a light at the end of this tunnel, and I already have another project in the works!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
The Doctor woke to the feel of the bed sinking beside him, followed closely by an arm slipping across his torso and a warm body curling next to him, a leg situating itself between his. He smiled, eyes still closed, and hummed.
“Good morning,” she murmured, close to his ear.
A low laugh rumbled his chest, and he didn’t bother pondering why. He was too happy to pick it apart.
“Morning,” he answered her, tugging her a little closer. She acquiesced, snuggling into him.
“Sleep well?” She asked.
He hummed again. “Best sleep I’ve had in a long, long time.”
“Good.” She sounded satisfied.
He raised his head and bent it to kiss her hair. “Thank you.”
She didn't ask 'for what', and he knew she wouldn't have to. Her fingertip made a lazy circle on his chest. “You’re welcome.”
“So,” he said, allowing himself a bit of a stretch and trying not to focus too much on her touch, lest other, untested parts of him wake up and embarrass him. “What would you like to do today?”
The kiss took him off guard, but it took less than a blink for him to turn towards her a little, pull her as close to him as he could get her, and return the kiss with fervor. She propped up, granting herself better access and control. The Doctor brought his hands up to her sides to help stabilize her, but once she seemed steady, he sent them out to explore her.
He inhaled sharply when she nipped his lower lip, then groaned a little when her tongue took advantage of the situation and slipped inside his mouth. He opened to her, his blood on fire and his brain shutting down bit by bit, focusing itself solely on his wife, leaning over him, snogging him senseless.
She tasted faintly of mint, a detail he noticed and almost immediately dismissed as unimportant. The only important things were the way her hand was plucking at the hem of his vest top and the way his very soul seemed to luxuriate under every touch of her skin against his.
He was so focused on the way she was kissing him and touching him - like she wanted him closer than a heartbeat - that he didn’t notice his vest being tugged up and away until she withdrew her mouth from his to pull it over his head. He didn’t wait for her lips to descend to his once she’d tossed it away, he brought his hand up to the back of her head and pulled her back down to him, claiming her mouth as his own.
Rose’s hand returned to his chest, her fingertips stroking him lightly and earning something akin to a growl. She broke the kiss to look down at him, and he took advantage of her inattention, brushing her hair out of his way and letting his lips and tongue launch an attack against her neck.
She fairly purred, undulating against him, muttering in frustration at her belly, and her hand drifted lower, lower, lower to the waistband of his pajamas. He let his mind brush against hers, soft and tentative, but her mind recoiled and she shored up her mental walls. The Doctor drew back from her mentally and his whole body stiffened. Why had she done that? Did she not want this? Did she not want him?
Rose gave no other indication of hesitancy...her hands and mouth continued to roam him.
She’s not ready for this, his brain chided him.
“Rose.”
The Doctor didn’t recognize the voice as his own for a few moments, and it surprised him when he finally did. Rose didn’t acknowledge him, she just kept nipping at his jaw and dipped her fingers below the cloth on his hips. He groaned.
His brain didn’t stop seeking his attention. Is she really ready for this? She can’t be, if she’s not letting you in. She’s still not accepted you.
The hurt nearly choked him.
“Rose.”
She had started dropping little kisses across his chest, and fucking hell he didn’t want her to stop that. Her lips against his skin felt even better in this new body than it had in the last, and he was going absolutely mad with want. It seemed like so long since she touched him this way. The three weeks since he regenerated had been interminable. He needed her, needed this intimacy. And whatever intimacy she would afford him, he’d take gladly.
His brain, his traitorous brain, wouldn’t accept that nor leave him alone.
If you do this too soon, it’ll set you back to the beginning.
“Rose, wait.”
Rose did not, in fact, wait or stop kissing him, she merely pulled the tips of her fingers out of his waistband and reached to the knot that held them in place over his slim hips, tugging insistently. He hadn’t seen her like this in months. Rassilon, she was eager this morning.
Is she really, though? Is she eager, or just doing this to make you happy?
The Doctor, cursing himself soundly within his own mind, brought his hand down to stop hers.
She’s never seen you before. Not this you. This is all new for her. She’s not ready.
“Wait, Rose.”
She looked up at him then. “What is it, Doctor? Don’t you want to?”
He almost laughed at the absurdity of the question. If he let her hand go, she could drop it a couple of inches to the south and see just how damned much he wanted to. Turned out that the underside of his jaw was a major erogenous zone for him, and she’d been laving it with her tongue.
“I do, Rose,” he fairly groaned. “So much.”
“Then what’s wrong?”
“Is this what you want?”
She laughed then, a sound entirely too sensual for his sanity, and brought her mouth down to his. “What do you think?”
“I don’t want you to do this unless you’re absolutely certain you’re ready.”
“Send your hand on a bit of a wander and you can see just how ready I am, Time Lord.”
She pulled her wrist free from his hand and untied his pants with one tug of a string, then wasted no time in getting her hand under the fabric and around him, stroking gently, up and down. He whimpered in spite of himself.
It’s bravado. She wants to please you. She’s not fully accepted you yet, and you know it.
The Doctor groaned. It felt so damned good...but still his stupid brain wouldn’t shut up.
If you’re going to do this, you’d better make it good for her. But it’s still a bad idea. Try to connect to her again.
He did, reaching out the faintest tendril of his own consciousness. Just as before, her mind blocked him out while her hand continued to torture him. He was confused and hurt. Why wouldn’t she let him in?
She’s not ready, but if you make it good for her, show her what this new body is capable of, she just might be ready soon…
“I don’t want to fuck, Rose,” he said, nearly whimpering. “I want to make love to you. I want to…ohh...I want to show you-”
Her mouth fell on his, nearly plundering, her tongue mimicking the up-and-down motion of her hand around him. He told his brain to shut it and kissed her back, again bringing his hand up and holding her face to his.
They were both breathing raggedly when their foreheads met. Rose’s hand bobbed up and down, her fingers opening and closing a little around him to create a delicious friction, her thumb sliding over the tip of his cock every few strokes to catch the drops that gathered there, and she bent her head to seek out his neck, licking and sucking at the place behind his ear, then nipping his earlobe.
“Why can’t we do both?” she asked on a breathy whisper, and the Doctor’s resolve cracked. He flipped her over onto her back, mindful of her belly. This earned a giggle that he immediately stole from her with his own mouth, his tongue exploring. He raised himself on one elbow, doing as she had suggested and sending his hand out to explore.
His hand found her breast first, massaging it through her vest top, and he decided that the garment had to go. His skin was crying out for hers, dying to know what she would feel like sliding against his new, more tactile body. He sat up enough to take the bottom of her shirt in both hands and start tugging it upwards. Rose raised her shoulders and arms obediently to let him get rid of it, then clasped her hand around the back of his neck and pulled him back down to her.
The Doctor brought his hand up to massage her breast and she moaned into his mouth at the contact. She was so much more sensitive to his touches now, the hormones that raged through her system left her more responsive to the slide of his hand and he both reveled in it and took advantage of it. She moaned again as he palmed her and the sound pleased him, so he used the pads of his thumb and middle finger to roll her nipple, tweaking it a bit. She moaned louder and the Doctor brought his head down to her shoulder, his lips seeking out her collarbone and tracing it with his tongue, locating all the places that had always driven her wild.
Rose was running her fingers through his hair, scraping her nails against his scalp, and bloody hell that was perfect. He palmed her breast once more, then brought his mouth down to the neglected breast while his hand slid down to her shorts. He wasted no time on gaining permission this time; he figured that her gently rolling hips and little whimpers were all the permission he’d need. His hand snaked around her abdomen and ducked into her shorts, immediately seeking out her center. The smell of her arousal swirled all around him, and only grew more intense when he ran his fingers lightly over the fabric of the little knickers that covered her. He traced his fingers up and down her slit, teasing her through the fabric, earning a whine for his efforts.
“What, is that not good?” he said against her skin, mischievous.
“Please,” she said, her voice breathy.
He walked his fingers up to the waistband of her knickers. “Please what, Rose?” he asked, bringing his lips back to her breast to suckle there.
“Please, Doctor,” she moaned.
He pulled the elastic away from where it lay against her, giving a couple of light, teasing tugging motions as if he were going to take them off. “This, Rose?”
She didn’t answer, just brought her hips up, seeking his hand. He obliged as soon as he tossed her knickers away, running his middle finger up and down, parting her lips and finding her damp. He circled her entrance with one finger; his mouth left her breast and trailed kisses up her chest, towards her neck.
“Is this what you want?” He murmured against the hollow of her throat, then brought his finger up to press against her clit in a light, pulsing touch. “Or this? Is this it, Rose?”
Rose gasped, arching her back a bit, and he let his smile trace up the side of her neck. Her breasts weren’t the only part of her more sensitized now, and he decided to use that to his fullest advantage. The Doctor replaced his finger with his thumb, then sent his long finger down to her entrance, circling once before sliding it inside of her.
“Maybe this is it?” he teased, his voice silky, before catching her earlobe between his teeth. He withdrew his finger and added a second, slowly, carefully, his thumb never stopping its work against her clit.
“You…” she gasped. “You like to talk…”
“Is that a problem?” He sounded innocent, even as he slipped his fingers inside her.
“No,” she gulped. “Not a problem. Just keep...keep doing what you’re doing.”
He chuckled, low. “Oh, I’m not going to stop, Rose.” He pressed his lips to the skin of her jaw, directly under his mouth. “I’m going to keep doing this,” another kiss, “keep worshipping you,” a nip, then soothed the bite with his tongue, “until you fall apart for me... and then we’ll start all over.”
Rose whined low in her throat, and he curled his fingers, going straight to the spot he knew drove her wild, stroking it as he pushed his fingers in and out with increasing speed. “You’d like that, wouldn’t you, love? You like it when I make you mindless.”
“Please…”
“Anything you want, Rose. Anything at all. Just ask.”
“Just…ungh...please…”
The Doctor intensified his speed, working in earnest to bring her to climax. “Is this the way you want to come, Rose?”
“On you…” she breathed against his mouth. “Want to...want to feel you.”
“Soon,” he promised, rescuing her lower lip from between her teeth and taking it between his instead. Her hips grinded against his hand, chasing her pleasure, and the Doctor praised her. “You’re so beautiful when you come...I want to see it. That’s it, precious girl, come for me.”
Rose stiffened beneath him and for a moment, a tenth of a second, he thought she was coming. But she wasn’t. He stilled then withdrew his hand, putting his forehead against her belly.
Told you, his brain chided him.
“What’s wrong, Rose?” he asked without looking up, his voice choked.
She was crying. “You haven’t called me….that’s what you used to…”
“You’re not ready for this, are you? That’s why you won’t connect with me.”
She reached up and brushed the tear that had fallen from the corner of her eye away almost angrily. “I’m sorry. I’m being stupid. But that’s all I have left of him...of you…”
The Doctor gritted his teeth, his erection - so eager just a moment ago - fading away. He looked up at her, and his eyes were pleading. “Rose, it’s me. I don’t know what else I can do to prove it’s me, and the only way I can do it and leave no doubt is for us to connect.”
“I know…”
He was trying not to sound disheartened and pleading, struggling to keep his voice even. “And I already showed you, right after I regenerated. I proved to you then that it was me. You saw me.”
“I know,” she sniffled.
“And I’ve done everything I can think of to reassure you that I’m still me since then.”
“I know,” she repeated, sounding miserable.
He did his best to keep the frustration out of his voice. “Then what’s the problem?”
“I don’t know!” she cried.
The Doctor took a deep breath and brought the covers up and over her. If she felt exposed, the least he could do is shield her, make her feel safe again. She rolled to her side away from him and he scooted up behind her, intending to hold her. She didn’t protest, so he put his arm around her and sought out her hand. Maybe...maybe just her touch would soothe the howling pain in his mind right now.
“It’s me, Rose,” he said, and he was ashamed by the beseeching note he heard there, but he couldn’t help himself. “It’s me. But I can’t prove to you that it’s me unless you let me in.” She didn’t answer, just kept crying. “I call you my precious girl because you are, just as you were then. I know you miss me, the old me, but there’s nothing I can do about it without our minds touching. If you’ll just let me in… Just let me in, Rose. You’ll know it’s me and we can put all of this behind us.”
“I’m scared.”
“Of what?” He was genuinely surprised by the admission.
“Of letting you go. The old you.”
The Doctor blinked back his own tears. He knew that it had to be hard for her, nearly impossible to accept, but he’d thought that maybe she did, maybe she accepted him now. They’d been so close…so close.
“I’m still here,” he whispered against her shoulder. “I’m here, but you can’t see me. You won’t see me.” He rolled over, onto his back, and tried to think of a time in his long life that he’d felt more defeated. He couldn’t.
The silence was long, and each second felt like a millennium until he felt her. Against his mind he felt a touch, so light it could have been accidental, but he knew it wasn’t. He reached out to her, tentatively, hopefully, giving her the mental equivalent of open arms, and waited.
“Let me show you, Rose,” he said. “Please. Let me show you.”
She eased forward in his mind and he wrapped her in love, acceptance, and peace. She let more of herself go, and he slowly, ever so slowly, began to see the glittering gold of her consciousness. He sent a wave of bright, yellow love and glee, and immediately showed her himself.
“It’s you. You’re blue,” she half-snuffled, half-laughed. “You’re still blue.”
“All of the important things about me are the same, precious girl,” he said, and this time she didn’t cringe. “I love you, Rose. Can you see it?”
“Yes,” she said quietly. “I can.”
Then the Doctor was hit with such a wave of longing, love, adoration and joy that he almost reeled. He caught a glimpse of her dark grief, but she closed the door on it. Before he had a chance to remark, she had rolled beside him and had her hand in his hair, pulling him close, snogging him senseless.
“I love you, too, Doctor,” she murmured against his mouth and all of the tension left his shoulders.
He suddenly felt remorse from her, a deep indigo violet of regret.
“Hey, no, none of that. Don’t be sorry. Don’t ever be sorry.”
He sent her comfort and gratitude, and she seemed confused.
“Why are you thankful?”
“I’m just…blimey,” he sighed, luxuriating in the contact of her mind and her fingers in his hair. “It feels good to touch you again.” He relaxed fully for the first time in weeks, content and comfortable within his own mind, closing his eyes to bask in the way her love felt, washing over him.
She chuckled, low and seductive, trailing her fingers across his chest again, making him shiver. “Does it now?”
“Mhmm,” he hummed, oblivious to the double entendre he’d just uttered.
“Want me to show you what else feels good?” Rose purred, placing soft little kisses in the wake of her fingertips, crawling up his torso.
She sent him a powerful wave of lust, and he felt himself stir against her. “What’s that?”
“This,” she said, and tugged him over so that he was above her once more, catching his lips as she did.
She went on to show him multiple things that felt really, really good.
Notes:
Every update, I'm amazed by the numbers on this fic. Just amazed. I never thought this would happen, and it's you guys that keep me plodding on every week. You have my thanks, gratitude and love, and that's not lip service.
Spring Break starts for my kids tomorrow and they don't go back until April 4. During the same time, TRF&E will be out of town, so I won't have a beta. She and I have become a well-oiled fic-producing machine over the last three months (!) with a definite series of events that happens in a particular order and goes into each chapter, but because of my kids and her (extremely well-deserved) vacation, we won't be able to work together much for the next ten days or so.
Said all that to say this: I may be forced to skip an update in the not-too-distant future. I'm going to try not to, but I'm also not going to bug TRF&E on her vacation and I can't ignore my kids just to stay caught up.
Just giving y'all a heads up.
Chapter 33: Itchy Feet and Torchwood
Summary:
Jack and the Doctor take off to Scotland, 1879.
Notes:
Hope you all had a wonderful Easter (if you celebrate)!
This chapter isn't exactly adventure heavy, but it furthers the plot a bit.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Rose lay curled next to the Doctor’s side, her hand idly stroking the light hair on his chest while his fingers drew desultory little ellipses up and down her arm. She was content. She was happy. She was…
Guilty.
She’d locked her mind down when the Doctor sent out a little telepathic nudge, and felt pretty sure she’d hurt him by doing so. In fact, she was absolutely certain that she’d hurt him. He’d closed the door on that particular part of his mind, but she could tell. He’d been wounded by her actions when she blocked him out.
Why hadn’t she let him in? She’d trusted him enough the day after his regeneration to connect like he wanted - just before she’d slapped him. Why hadn’t she trusted him this time?
She’d been afraid. Afraid to connect with him and sense the blue of his presence. There was no logic in it, she knew, but she’d not been able to help it.
The Doctor sighed beside her, a happy sound, then kissed the top of her head. “My alalia,” he breathed.
The guilt hit her again like a physical blow to the chest, and she felt tears pricking the back of her eyes.
“It’s alright, you know,” he said, his voice quiet, and for a moment, she wondered if she’d forgotten to put her walls up and he could feel her guilt.
No, that wasn’t it. He just knew her that well.
“What’s alright?”
“That we didn’t connect right away. Please don’t be sorry. I understand.”
Rose felt shame curl her insides into a ball. “I’m sorry anyway.”
“Don’t be,” he said, lying the flat of his palm against the skin of her arm. “That was a big step we just took. I understand it had to have been hard for you.”
“I wasn’t ready to let go of the old you. Not completely.” A tear slid out of the corner of her eye and onto his chest.
“Hey, now,” he said, adjusting his body so that he could make eye contact and still keep her wrapped in his arms. “Don’t cry, Rose. It’s alright. Truly, it is.”
“I hurt you.”
“Nah. Well, I mean, yeah, it stung a bit. But I understand.”
“Do you? Really?”
The Doctor kissed the tip of her nose. “I do. And as I said, it’s alright. Do you accept me now, though?”
Rose nodded, another tear slipping from her eyes. “Yes, I know it’s you. I accept you. Doesn’t mean I won’t miss your voice.”
He gathered her closer without saying anything. She nuzzled into his neck, willing herself to stop crying. He was here, she was safe, he loved her, and she knew it was him. There was no reason for tears, she told herself.
“Thank you, Rose.”
“For what?”
“For loving me, for staying with me through this. It felt so good to be able to touch you again. Mentally. Well, the physical touching wasn’t half-bad either…”
She swatted him playfully. “’Wasn’t half bad’?!”
“What?” he said, his eyes dancing with innocence and mischief in equal measure.
She huffed a little through a smile and nuzzled back down into his chest. It had felt wonderful - it had been fantastic - to feel his presence in her mind that way, after so long. Maybe they should do it again… She suggested as much and he let out a low, predatory chuckle.
There was a knock on the door, and both Rose and the Doctor jerked their heads towards it, the moment broken.
“Rose? You in there? Have you seen the Doctor?”
The Doctor made a show of sighing, rolling onto his back and pulling Rose over to him. “Tell him I’m not here. You haven’t seen me. I've vanished. Anything.”
She grinned at how put out he sounded, then answered Jack: “I’m here, Jack, but I’m not decent!”
“Have you seen the Doctor?” His voice sounded urgent, and Rose looked up at the Doctor. He’d caught onto Jack’s tone, too.
“What’s wrong?” Rose asked.
“Got a bit of a problem, and need the Doctor.”
The Doctor and Rose both started scrambling for clothes, and when the Doctor tied the waist of his pajama bottoms, he went to open the door, waiting for Rose’s nod indicating she was decent enough to see Jack before he swung it open.
“Has anyone ever told you that you have bloody rotten timing, Harkness?”
Jack gave the shirtless Doctor an appreciative look, up-and-down. “Not bad, Doc. Lookin’ good.”
The Doctor rolled his eyes. “Stop it.”
Rose giggled, and Jack stepped in the door. “Did you two…” he made a gesture between Rose and the Doctor, and she blushed.
“That’s my girl!” he said, excited, coming over to Rose to lift her into a hug, despite her belly. Rose giggled some more and swatted his arm when he set her down again.
“You’re incorrigible, Jack,” she scolded lightly.
“Among other things,” the Doctor grumped. “What did you need, Harkness? Or are you here to gloat about my love life and swing my pregnant wife about like a rag doll?”
“‘Gee, Jack, is everything alright? Gee, Jack, weren’t you in London last night? Gee, Jack, what on Earth could have brought you back here and made you wake us up so early in the morning?’” Jack said, sounding just the tiniest bit frustrated.
“Alright, fine. You look healthy enough. So… Weren’t you in London last night? What brought you back?”
“So I was going through the Torchwood archives,” he said, having a seat in front of the fire and propping his feet on the coffee table. The Doctor rolled his eyes at Jack’s level of comfort, but grabbed his vest and sat across from him.
“I’m going to get a shower,” Rose said, “while you two talk.” She walked over and gave the Doctor a kiss - which left him with half-closed, blissful looking eyes - and then started towards the ensuite.
“How come I never get any of that?” Jack pouted.
“Harkness,” the Doctor growled.
“You two behave yourselves,” Rose admonished, then shut the door behind her.
~*~O~*~
A short while later, she walked out to find the Doctor tying his tie while he bounced around the room excitedly. Jack looked on, amused.
“Rose!” the Doctor cried, then ran over to her. “I have to go for a bit. Not long. The day.”
She gave him a look. “We were going to London today, I thought. I have an appointment with Martha, remember?”
“Ah. Yes,” he said, sounding deflated.
“What have you got to do?”
“Jack was making his new bloke do all the grunt work at Torchwood…”
“Hey!” Jack shouted from the couch.
“...and they stumbled up on some old documents. It would seem that Torchwood was founded because of me! Can you believe it?”
“Yes,” Rose answered honestly. He ignored her cheek and just carried on.
“In 1879, I apparently saved the Queen’s life from a werewolf at a place called Torchwood, which led to the founding of this Torchwood. So, you see, I have to go do that.”
“Right now?” she questioned him.
“Er...well…” he stammered, tugging on the back of his neck.
“Doctor, you are a Time Lord,” she reasoned. “You own a TARDIS. You don’t have to go do that right now. You can go with me to see Martha and check on the babies and then go save the Queen another day.”
“But… But Rose, if I don’t do it, I’m putting an entire timeline in jeopardy!”
Rose peered at him through narrowed eyes. She knew better and what's more, he knew she knew better. “So you’re telling me you have to go right this instant to go save Queen Victoria from werewolves?”
“Yes! I mean, no, not right this instant...” he backpedaled. “Oh, but Rose, wouldn’t it be brilliant?”
"What if the TARDIS mis-times the landing? What if you don't make it back in time?"
"Now, Rose, you know that the TARDIS wouldn't ever let me miss Moppet and Smidgen's birth. It's not an issue, won't become one."
She stared at him for a minute. She was frustrated, but more than that, she was sad and felt a flicker of fear. He didn’t need to go, and she knew that if she insisted he would stay. Should she? It was more than a little frustrating to be missing all the fun.
“How are those feet, Doctor?” she asked, her voice low.
His eyes widened, then softened and he reached out to her. “Rose…”
She shook her head, giving him a sunny but hollow smile. She couldn't keep him tied down to this slow path any more than he'd already tied himself down. It wasn't fair. “Go, Doctor. It’ll be fine.”
“This has nothing to do with the state of my feet, Rose.”
“I know that,” she said, blinking back tears. “It’s just an opportunity for adventure, yeah? You should go. Take Jack, so you're not alone.”
“I don’t have to go, Rose,” he said, taking her hand in both of his and bringing it up to his lips. “I’m sure the timeline will be fine until you can go, too.”
Now she was sure she was being a bit unfair, but she couldn’t seem to stop the maelstrom of emotions and thoughts. Would she ever have fun and adventures again, now that she would have the babies? It was unlikely that she’d put herself in the path of a werewolf when she knew her daughters needed her.
But what if you regenerate again? Rose wanted to ask. They had just gotten over that obstacle in their relationship; they’d literally only cleared the last hurdle a couple of hours before. She didn’t want to start all over.
She didn’t mention it, just sighed instead and gave him another smile, this one more genuine. “Go. Have your adventure. I’m going into town and spend the day with Mum, I guess.”
“You, Rose Tyler,” he said with a kiss to the fingers he held in his, then another to the tip of her nose, “are brilliant. And I love you.”
Rose felt her cheeks flush at the proclamation, but she didn’t say anything. He didn’t seem to notice, anyway. He just brought his lips down to hers and snogged her breathless, giving her a sultry little smirk when he pulled away.
“I love you, too,” she answered. “Now go, you nutter,” she grinned in spite of herself, then pushed him away gently. “Before I change my mind and tag along.”
“You’re staying at Jackie’s flat?”
“Well, we have to go to UNIT, but I don’t have any other plans.”
He fixed her with a gaze, and she knew what was coming. “You won’t wander off?”
Rose shook her head with a smile. “No, I won’t.”
He gave her one more brilliant, near-manic grin, then picked up his long coat with a flourish. “Let’s go, Jack!” he called out, excited. “Allons-y!”
~*~O~*~
Jackie went with Rose to UNIT to see Martha, since the Doctor and Jack had swanned off to fight a mythological creature. The babies were growing a bit slowly, but according to Martha (based on the Doctor’s previous input), that was to be expected in a Time Lord pregnancy. As long as the girls were healthy, Rose didn’t mind the slow growth. She was already feeling huge and had found her first stretchmark that morning in the shower. The idea of getting larger was more than a bit dreadful.
Martha found that Rose’s blood pressure was just a bit high, but Rose explained that it was probably due to the Doctor taking off on an unnecessary trip to fight a werewolf. Martha merely nodded at the statement that anyone else on earth would have found completely bizarre. Martha, however, didn’t look at her as if she were mad.
“I’ve read bits of his file,” she said. “That sounds like something he would do.” She patted Rose’s hand. “He’ll be back. He always comes back, yeah? You have to stay calm while he’s gone. That’s your job.” Rose nodded in agreement and consciously relaxed her shoulders.
Martha did a quick scan to examine the hernia and found that it was in much the same condition as the last time she’d looked in on it. She encouraged Rose to take it easy, telling her to limit her physical activity to non-strenuous things. Rose grumbled a little, but Jackie wasted no time in assuring Martha that Rose wasn’t doing anything taxing while she was around. Rose just rolled her eyes.
Rose took advantage of her time with Martha to good-naturedly tease her about Mickey. Martha blushed quite becomingly, and told Rose that it was still early days, but she rather liked Mickey. They had a date scheduled for the next night and Rose wished her the best of luck, telling her they’d all have to do dinner sometime soon.
Unsurprisingly, Jackie didn’t want to go home when they left UNIT and suggested that they go shopping for maternity clothes, citing the late-September weather that was cooling things off considerably. Rose agreed, and ended up leaving the maternity shop with several pair of jeans, some jumpers, and a nice, heavy, wool peacoat that was specially designed to accommodate a pregnant woman’s growing belly.
Pete called Jackie while they were checking out at the maternity store, and Rose was entertained to see her mum giggling and blushing, before agreeing to meet him somewhere in a little while.
“That Pete?” Rose asked, knowing the answer.
“Yeah,” Jackie smiled, closing the phone.
“Things serious between you two?”
“Oh, I don’t know,” Jackie hedged. “He’s so much like your dad was, Rose. It’s funny... I always wished you could get to know your dad, and now it’s almost like I got what I wished for.”
Rose was a bit incredulous. “He’s really that much like Dad?”
“Rose, if I didn’t know better, I’d say he is your dad,” Jackie said earnestly. “He’s exactly like my Pete was. Talks the same way, moves the same way, everything. And having him around has only served to show me just how much you’re alike.”
“Me?” Rose was surprised.
“Yeah, you. Two peas in a pod, you are.”
Rose pondered all of this as they made their way to the Tube. “Well,” she said, “I suppose I’ll just have to get to know him a bit better.”
“You’ll get your chance. He’s going to be around a fair bit, I suspect,” Jackie said, blushing. “Plus, we’re headed to Torchwood now to meet him and Mickey and Jake.”
~*~O~*~
Rose wasn’t sure what she’d expected when she got to Torchwood, but it looked like any other office building. A receptionist called back to Pete, but Jake came out to meet the ladies. He told them that Pete literally had his hands full but was almost done, and he’d take them to the lab to meet him.
The lab looked like any other lab she’d seen on telly, except for the man who looked just like her father with a beaker in his hand. He looked up when Jake swung the door open and let them in.
“Jacks! Rose!” he called out.
Jackie waved excitedly, and Pete put down what he was working on to come greet them. “You’re just in time. I’ve hit a stopping point.” He kissed Jackie’s cheek, and Rose didn’t miss the twinkle in her mother’s eye when he did. He hesitated awkwardly in front of Rose, then gave her a quick hug.
“What’re you working on, Pete?” Rose asked politely.
“Vitex,” he said proudly.
“It’s a health tonic,” Jackie said, sounding just as proud.
Rose grinned at the two of them, then got a confused look when what Pete said sunk in fully. “Wait, I thought this was Torchwood?”
“It is,” Pete said. “But the government decided that after the fiasco here a month or so ago, they didn’t want to publicly back the agency that had caused it. So they agreed to let us rebuild on the condition that we have a company as a front. And, well, it just so happens that I was quite the successful businessman where I’m from.” Rose was surprised that didn’t sound arrogant when he said it, just proud.
“So you’re recreating your business from the other world?”
“That’s right! And I’m quite close to getting the formula just right. Once I do, I can focus more of my attention on Torchwood and relieve Jack a bit. And it won’t hurt that, if I’m successful, I’ll be a bit more well-off. We can get out of that flat on the Estate. Put Jacks in a real house.”
“That serious, are you?” Rose raised an eyebrow.
“Well,” Pete said awkwardly, putting his arm around Jackie. “It’s not as if we don’t know each other. And there are differences, but I rather like the differences.”
Rose had to admit, it all sounded promising, and it was nice to see her mother smile again. She certainly deserved a nice place to live, and it would be wonderful to see her claim the life she would have had if her father hadn’t died.
Pete offered her a taste of the prototype, but she declined at the same time Jackie swatted his arm for such a thoughtless question.
“Of course she can’t have any of your barmy drink! Who knows if it’s safe for pregnant women!” Jackie cried, a complete turnaround from the pride she’d been exhibiting just a few minutes earlier.
“I know it's safe! It’s just a run-of-the-mill health drink, might even be good for her!”
“Well Rose isn’t exactly carrying run-of-the-mill babies, now is she?” Jackie shot back.
Rose just hid her snicker behind her hand while her mum and her father’s doppelganger bickered back and forth with obvious affection.
~*~O~*~
The Doctor and Jack showed up at Jackie’s flat, triumphant and crowing about their success against a werewolf just as Rose was cutting up the salad for dinner. She stepped out into the lounge to kiss the Doctor quickly, trying not to let on about how anxious she’d been while he was gone, and telling him to come see her when he’d finished reliving his grand adventure. He pouted a little. “Roooose, don’t you want to hear my story now?”
“You don’t need to show off for me, Doctor. I know you’re plenty impressive.”
He gave her a filthy grin and Jackie swatted him on the arm for it. He glared at his mother-in-law for a second before he returned his attention to Rose, tugging her closer by the hips, this time without the lascivious look.
“But you’re my favorite person to show off for, Rose,” he said in a low, suggestive voice. “Don’t you want to listen in?”
“Not if you want to eat,” she replied with a tongue-touched grin. He gave her his mock-put-upon sigh and she giggled, “Don’t worry, Doctor. I’m sure I’ll hear the two of you while I’m in there.” Then she stood on her tiptoes and gave him a quick kiss before she ducked back into the kitchen.
It was only a few minutes later when he slipped up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist, resting his hands lightly on her belly and kissing her at the join of her neck and shoulder. He took a deep breath and rested his head there.
Rose didn’t ask if he was alright. She’d felt the anxiety of their separation as well as the nearly overwhelming relief to have him back to her, safe. She knew that now, while they were alone, he’d let down his guard and talk to her about it.
“Hey,” he said against her shoulder.
“Hey yourself,” she replied, a little cheeky.
“Can I just stay here? Like this?” he murmured. His voice was soft, but Rose could hear the note of distress.
“Was it bad?"
"Not terrible. Scotland is always lovely. I got to use my Scottish accent. You'd like it."
She might have bought the idea that it was all fine except his long-fingered hands were around her, towing her back towards him in gentle little tugs. His mouth against her shoulder blade was telling her that it wasn't bad, but his anxious hands trying to get as close to her as possible said otherwise.
"Really, Doctor. You can tell me the truth, I won’t think you any less impressive if you say it was bad.”
“Wasn’t the worst, but I was worried there for a bit. Close call,” he admitted.
Rose put the knife and carrots down and covered his hands on her belly. “How long was it for you?”
He kissed the bare patch of skin again and she shivered. “Two days. Entirely too long. I didn't like being away from you.”
She dumped the carrots she was chopping into the bowl and turned around to face him, putting her own arms around his neck. He pulled her close and just held her there.
“Why don’t you stay here for a while, yeah? On Earth, in 2007. With me. Maybe we’ll take it easy on the adventure for a bit.”
“It’s not the adventure,” he said between the slow butterfly kisses he was trailing down her jaw and neck, then he touched his forehead to hers. “We left the TARDIS a good bit away from Torchwood Estate, and I was afraid I would be stuck there. I was afraid the TARDIS would be moved or that I couldn't find it or...something...I was just afraid. That I wouldn’t get back to you. That you'd have the babies without me. I was worried about being on the slow path and away from you and the girls for a long time. Well over a hundred years.”
“You made it back, you’re here now,” she soothed him.
He lay his forehead on her shoulder and she reached up to stroke the back of his head.
“I’m here now,” he agreed.
“Oi!” Jackie shouted from the doorway. “You two keep the hanky-panky to your own house and out of my kitchen!”
“Ooh, there’s hanky-panky! I wanna watch!” Jack piped up from behind her.
The Doctor raised his head and looked at the ceiling, muttering in utter frustration, looking as if he were praying for strength. Rose snickered and put a little kiss on his adam’s apple, ignoring her mother’s “tcha!” of outrage.
~*~O~*~
Jackie’s flat was really getting to be too small for all of the people involved in their lives to gather now, the Doctor thought. The dinner table only fit seven, even if everyone crowded next to each other, and while it wasn’t a problem for him to sit that closely to Rose, having Mickey crowding him on the left side was a bit disconcerting. Mickey ate with gusto, and the Doctor found himself getting jabbed by eager elbows all through the meal more often than not.
The Doctor was content, though, overall. He’d never expected to have a family, never really thought he wanted one, but he couldn’t say he was sorry for it now. It was nice to have people who cared about what happened to him. More than that, it was lovely to see so many people who loved his Rose.
Speaking of…
“Pete, I’m glad you’re here tonight. You, too, Mickey. Jake.”
Mickey raised an eyebrow at him. “You’re never glad I’m around.”
“Nothing up my sleeve,” the Doctor protested, leaning back and putting his arm around Rose. “I mentioned this to Jack, but I wanted to wait until I had you all together to go into detail.”
“What’s up, boss?” Mickey asked. The rest of the table looked interested, too.
“Well…” he started, tugging his ear. “Since we’ve been here on Earth, we’ve run into a couple of people who...how shall I put this...made us uncomfortable. They were entirely too interested in Rose and the babies, and worried me. The way they looked at Rose...I didn't like it.”
“What happened?” Pete asked, sounding alarmed.
“There was a woman at the baby store,” Rose spoke up before the Doctor had a chance. “She wanted to chat us up about the babies and seemed kind of determined to do it.”
“What did she look like?” Jack demanded. The Doctor described Courtney.
“Oh, I met her!” Jackie said, and she seemed pleased to be able to contribute to the conversation in some way. “She was asking me about my grandbabies as well! It was the day you ended up at UNIT and we found out they were girls, do you remember Jack? She seemed nice enough.”
“That’s right. Yeah, something about her felt off to me,” Jack said seriously.
“I remember you said so,” Jackie nodded.
“She felt off to us, too,” Rose said, looking up at the Doctor and covering her belly. “She made both of us nervous.”
“And it wasn’t the first time. I’ve had the same feeling a couple of times before, with other people,” the Doctor agreed, “although it was the first time Rose noticed it.”
Rose disagreed, her face screwed up in thought. “Not so. I remember something similar happening in New New York, when I was talking to the Face of Boe.”
He swiveled his head to look at her. “Really?”
She shrugged, unperturbed by his sharp look. “In hindsight it seems really fishy. She wanted to know about the babies, and specifically wanted us to come back and have them there, at their hospital. I didn’t think much of it at the time, though. Just seemed like an over-friendly cat nun.”
Jackie mouthed the words ‘cat nun’, and Mickey just shook his head in resignation.
Rose continued, “Nothing like that had happened before and hasn't happened since, so I just put it out of my mind.”
“I wish you had told me.”
“I remember her telling me about that,” Jack said, sounding pensive. “I thought it was weird, just like Rose did, but I wasn’t worried at the time. I think I may have even told her to forget about it.”
The Doctor scowled. “Well that complicates things a bit.”
“How so?” Jake wanted to know.
“Well, before I knew about one of the Sisters of Plenitude asking after the babies, this had only happened on Earth. Knowing that it’s happened throughout time and space…”
“You think it’s aliens?” Jackie gasped.
“I dunno, Jacks.” The Doctor answered honestly. “Thing is, there’s no shortage of people who would love to get their hands on Rose or the girls, and I’ve made quite a lot of enemies in nine hundred years.”
Jackie scoffed. “Tell me something surprising.”
“Mum!”
“What?” she demanded. “You can’t tell me you’re shocked.”
“What do you want us to do?” Pete asked, ignoring both of them.
“I’ve spoken with Rose about this, but I’m even more alarmed now. I want one of us with her all the time. I don’t know who these people are or what they want, but I’m afraid for Rose to be alone with them, and it seems that they could be anywhere.”
“That’s no problem,” Mickey said quickly, and Jake agreed. The Doctor tried to ignore the stab of bitter jealousy at the thought of Mickey protecting Rose.
“It really shouldn’t put any of you out all that much,” he said. “I should be with her most of the time.”
“And I’m not thrilled about this,” Rose groused.
The Doctor looked at her, feigning shock, lightening the mood. “You don’t want to spend your time with me?”
Rose just rolled her eyes at him. “You’re ridiculous.” She looked around at the others around the table. “I’m going along with this for the safety of the girls, and I won’t wander off. But just so you lot know, I’m not overly excited about being babysat all the time.”
“It’s not being babysat, Rosie,” Jack said soothingly. “It’s doing what you have to do to to protect the babies.”
“I know,” Rose said. “And that’s the only reason I’m going along with it.” A couple more people opened their mouths to speak, but Rose cut them off. “But now that we’ve covered that I won’t be left alone for a moment for the next several months, a bit more pleasant news, yeah? We’ll be having a Halloween party at ours and you're all invited.”
“We will?” the Doctor questioned her, and his shoulders slumped pitifully when he saw the determined look she was giving him. “But Roooose…”
She narrowed her eyes, and the Doctor cleared his throat. “I mean, yes. Halloween party sounds lovely. And you’re all invited, of course. You can bring a guest, if you like.”
Jackie beamed excitedly. “Oh, lovely! I haven’t been to a good fancy dress party in an age! I can make your costume, Rose!”
“Costumes…?” The Doctor groaned. Rose elbowed him in the side and he sighed, properly chastised.
“C’mere, Rose, let’s go look on Pete’s computer for some maternity costume ideas. We only have six weeks!”
The Doctor pinched the bridge of his nose and Mickey clapped him on the shoulder.
Notes:
It occurred to me (because of my amazing beta, who pointed it out) that I've not been using alalia, which I had intended to do. The reason for this (that I made up on the fly) is that it's only applicable to bonded couples, and because the bond was strained, the Doctor didn't feel comfortable using it. Does that work for everyone to cover my forgetfulness?
I have edited this chapter to within an inch of its life. I'm posting it right now before I "fix it 'til it's broke."
We're in the home stretch, guys! If I follow the outline, there are about seven or eight more chapters, and so far I'm sticking to the outline pretty faithfully.
"The End" or bust!
Chapter 34: Down Time
Summary:
The Doctor and Rose meet Ianto, then have a little down time.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
*~*~*Twenty-Nine Weeks*~*~*
The Doctor was starting to make more of a fuss over Rose these days, which both annoyed and pleased her. He’d taken to holding her hand anytime she was walking on an uneven surface or stairs and he flatly refused to let her travel by TARDIS anymore, citing the fact that the last time they’d taken it to London to avoid traffic, it had been a bit of a rough landing and Rose nearly fell. The Doctor had actually made Jack bring Rose back to Smithwood that evening while he flew the TARDIS home.
Rose did her best not to get annoyed with him - he’d let her know from day one that her hormones were going to trigger his hormones and protective instincts, and for the most part he’d been very good about not smothering her. She could only assume that the more advanced she was in her pregnancy, the more hormones she would be producing and the stronger his urge would be to hover over her. She gave him credit; he really was doing his best not to be obnoxious.
Rose had always taken great pride in her body and athleticism. She’d never had a problem keeping up with the Doctor and his ‘superior physiology’ when the two of them were out adventuring together, and she’d always rather liked the way her body looked.
But it no longer looked the way she’d always liked, now that she was approaching eight months pregnant. And while she gloried in the idea of impending motherhood and already loved the girls so much she could barely stand it, the Doctor had found her, more than once, crying over a stretchmark or swollen ankles or simply the fact that her body was not her own at the moment, and wouldn’t be for a while longer. She felt fat and unattractive, unwieldy and off-balance.
The Doctor certainly didn’t seem to mind her new body. He patiently held her, gave her comfort and sweet nothings, told her how much he loved her and wiped away her tears. He told her frequently, without prompting, that the sight of her with his babies in her belly was the most beautiful and erotic thing he’d ever seen, and how he loved to look at her. He loved to show her just how he felt, too, both in the bedroom and out of it. He made love to her as often as she’d let him, and he fawned over her when she didn’t feel up to sex. He rubbed away the swelling in her feet, he told her how gorgeous she was, and he stayed with her all night, every night, while she slept. In the morning, she would either wake to find him propped against the headboard with his spectacles on and a book in his lap, or (less often) sleeping beside her. The rare mornings that she woke and he wasn’t there were the mornings that he brought them breakfast in bed. He cooked for her, pampered her, and praised her.
No, she really shouldn’t complain.
But she still looked forward to the day when she could reclaim her body as her own.
~*~O~*~
After two weeks of nagging on Rose’s part (for which she was utterly unapologetic), Jack had brought Ianto around to dinner. Rose threatened the Doctor with dire consequences if he didn’t behave himself, but the Doctor had promised nothing, grinning at her and winking instead. Rose recognized that that was the best she was going to get out of him, and let it lie.
Ianto turned out to be handsome, charming, and intelligent. Rose liked him immediately. The Doctor seemed to be sizing him up, and Rose couldn’t tell if he was just winding Jack up or not. She took his hand at one point and felt his amusement and mischief, and realized that he was just trying to keep Jack on pins and needles. She let go of his hand and swatted his arm, and he sent her a smug smirk. “You said you’d behave,” she reminded him in a hiss that still held a stern tone. The Doctor put on a mock innocent look but said nothing, and she swatted him again.
Ianto just furrowed his brow in confusion.
“Just ignore them,” Jack said to Ianto, stabbing at his chicken and seeming unaffected by the behavior of the couple across the table from him. “You get used to it.”
Jack, for his part, seemed like a completely new man while Ianto was around, and even the Doctor (once he tired of his own shenanigans) seemed impressed by the change in their friend.
Ianto’s presence, however, didn’t stop Jack from hovering over Rose protectively, pulling out her chair and offering to go get things for her, doting on her and teasing the Doctor about shirking his duties, flirting with her outrageously and kidding her that the bigger she got, the hotter she got. He carried on like this until Ianto cleared his throat and the Doctor was glaring at him. Jack gave both of them a saucy wink, but he sat down and behaved himself until he and Ianto said their goodbyes after dessert and drove back to London for the evening.
Jack had started staying in London as often as he was at Smithwood, and Rose missed him terribly. She’d gotten used to having him around all of the time over the last year, and while she loved Martha and Shareen and Keisha and looked forward to the time she spent with them, Jack was really her best girlfriend - regardless of his gender. They laughed together and gossiped; Rose confessed her feelings of being fat and unattractive, and Jack confided in her about Ianto.
It was no surprise when he stayed in London more and more, especially now that Ianto was in the picture, but Rose hated him being gone. Whenever he was there, she insisted on the three of them spending evenings in the lounge together, watching TV or just reading in front of the fire that chased away the fall chill, simply being together as they’d always done when they were on the TARDIS.
This particular night, the trio had decided to watch some screwball comedy or another that had left Jack and Rose laughing uproariously while the Doctor just rolled his eyes with a smile. The three of them laughed for a bit after the movie, discussing their favorite parts, then Jack had announced he was going to bed, citing a need to get to London early the next morning. He kissed Rose’s cheek, bid them both goodnight, then retired to his little flat over the garage.
Rose was lying with her head in the Doctor’s lap while he watched the World News, his hand resting on the swell of her belly protectively. The girls seemed to be asleep; when she tried to connect with them, all she got was a quiet sense of peace.
She stroked the Doctor’s fingers on her belly, letting her own fingertips outline his, rising up and down over his knuckles and ducking into the space between his fingers.
“Doctor?”
“Yes, Rose?”
“Since you change your appearance, who will the babies look like? Another version of you? One I haven’t met? Will they resemble me at all? Is it just a roll of the dice as far as what they will look like?”
“I honestly don’t know, Rose. I’ve never done this before.”
Rose smiled almost benevolently and threaded her fingers through his. “I do hope at least one of them looks like you.”
He scoffed. “Bite your tongue, Rose.”
She huffed a laugh. “You don’t know just how handsome you are, do you?”
“Wouldn’t make a very handsome girl, I shouldn’t think.”
Neither said anything to further the debate and the Doctor started stroking her belly lightly, her hand still resting on his. Rose suspected that he was writing on her in Gallifreyan but didn’t ask.
“You’re a miracle, Rose. You and these girls. A miracle.”
Rose turned her head to look up at him, smiling. “The girls, yes, but me? I’m just a former shopgirl.”
“Oh, but you’re not. You’re ever so much more.” He paused for a minute, and Rose just watched him as he seemed to ponder. “I never believed in miracles, you know. Nine hundred years of time and space, and I never saw anything that would lead me to believe that there was any such thing. I’d seen stars and solar systems born and die, I’d dealt with an entire pantheon of gods, watched life and death in all forms, and I believed it was all a matter of course.
“Then, at my lowest point, I ran across you huddled in the basement of a department store I was about to blow up. Just that little quirk of chance, and suddenly we were together.” The Doctor paused, apparently in thought, but his fingers still stroked her, absently. “It was a miracle, Rose. Finding you was a little turn of fate that set in motion an entirely new, bright timeline for me. You - your compassion and your love - are a miracle. You saved me. As brilliant as you are, as many times as I’ve told you, you’ll never be able to understand how much you’ve healed me.”
Rose’s eyes misted a bit, but she blinked back her tears. She didn’t want to pull his attention from what he was saying; whether he was meandering through his thoughts or truly had something he wanted to say she didn’t know, but she wanted to hear it and her tears would distract him.
“I never deserved you, Rose. Still don’t. And the fact that you could love me...I still don’t understand it. I was empty after the Time War, but you filled me again.”
She blinked again, harder.
“And then there’s Smidgen and Moppet,” the Doctor said, opening his hand wide to spread across the expanse of her abdomen. “I was a rubbish father the first time. Wasn’t entirely my fault - Time Lords are conditioned to be aloof and unfeeling - but I was still a rubbish father. That won’t happen with Moppet and Smidgen. I won’t let it. I’ll do better this time, I’ll be what they need. I’ll be what you need. I promise, Rose. I’ll be the best I can be.”
“You’ll be brilliant,” she said fondly.
“These babies shouldn’t have happened. It should have been impossible for me to get you pregnant.”
“Are you sorry?” Rose asked, a sudden spike of concern bolting through her.
“Gods, no!” The Doctor ducked his eyes to her and said reproachfully, “Haven’t I proven it enough? How could you ever think that?”
“I just - I only wondered. If you regretted it. I know we’ve talked about it a bunch but...I dunno... jus’ insecure sometimes.”
“Oh, Rose.” He craned his neck to get to her lips and she met him part way, giving him a soft, sweet kiss. “I don’t regret this at all. Not one bit. But I never believed it could happen.” He smiled down at her lovingly. “It shouldn’t have been feasible. Human/Gallifreyan pregnancies aren’t supposed to be. They should, theoretically, be impossible. Even practically, if you took any other Gallifreyan and any other human, they wouldn’t be able to conceive.
“Conception is difficult enough in the best of circumstances with a couple of the same species. In a typical human pregnancy, everything has to be exactly, 100%, perfectly conditioned for a woman to conceive. Absolutely nothing - not one variable - can be wrong or there won’t be any kind of conception, implantation, or growth. It’s a miracle, really, that anyone ever gets pregnant. And then there’s us…”
The Doctor adjusted himself and bent to kiss her again, and again Rose lifted her head to meet him partway. He kissed her softly, chastely, then looked down at her almost reverently. “One little chance meeting between one of my cells and one of yours, then add in the interference of the Vortex and the TARDIS - meddlesome little matchmaker that she is - and suddenly the greatest miracles I’ve ever even heard about in a millennium are wiggling under my hand.”
“That reminds me...Doctor?” she asked.
“Hmm?”
“Did you get the results of the blood tests back?”
“I did.”
She waited for him to expand, but he didn’t. “And?”
“And it’s not bad,” he said. “So far, it’s all good news. But I can’t speak to the findings with 100% certainty until we do the scan after the babies are born, so I’d rather not.”
She twisted her head to look up at him. “You’re not going to tell me?”
“I’d rather not,” he repeated. “But so far it’s all wonderful, brilliant news. Can you trust me?”
Rose considered for a second. She trusted him implicitly, and since regeneration, he hadn’t kept any secrets from her. The fact that he was asking to keep something close to the vest now was significant and she knew it, but the curiosity about the results and what could be construed as ‘wonderful news’ was eating her up. After a short internal debate, she surrendered with a sigh. “Oh, alright. I’ll trust you.”
“So good of you, Rose,” he teased.
The girls had woken up, apparently, and were squirming around from hearing their father’s voice. One of them kicked directly under his hand, moving it visibly, and Rose giggled. “They like hearing you talk.” She put her tongue between her teeth and grinned up at him. “They’re going to grow up very content, if that’s all it takes to make them happy.”
“Oi!” he smiled, then raised her hand to his lips, kissing it gently, before bringing both of their hands back down to cover her. “She’s right, though, little ones. Your mum is right. She usually is, but don’t tell her that. I’m going to make you so happy, my wee, sweet ones. My precious girls. I love you with my life, little Moppet. And you, too, little Smidgen. All my lives.”
“That brings me to another point. What are we going to name these girls?”
“Well, I don’t know. What do you have in mind?”
“Do you want to give them Gallifreyan names?”
The Doctor shook his head. “Not really. Gallifrey is gone.” Rose heard the sadness she always did when he spoke of his home, but didn’t remark on it.
“So human names, then?” she asked, smiling up at him.
“I think so, yes.”
“Well, what did you have in mind?”
“Oooh,” he hesitated, puffing out his cheeks, looking around the room a bit. “I hadn’t thought much about it.”
She stuck her tongue between her teeth. “Do you mean to tell me that in the nearly eight months we’ve been pregnant, you’ve never once considered what you’d want to name these girls?”
“Well,” he stalled again, tugging the back of his neck and Rose tried not to giggle. “Maybe a little.”
“Why don’t you think on it and we’ll talk again in a few days.”
“You’ve got it.”
Notes:
You guys rock. Thanks for reading. <3
Chapter 35: Adipose
Summary:
The Doctor investigates a new medication that Jackie has been taking.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
*~*~*Thirty-one Weeks*~*~*
Rose was having weekly visits with Martha now, and UNIT usually pulled the Doctor off to work on something while he was there with her, leaving Rose and Martha to chat until he got done. They were also ringing him about once a week outside of the days he was already there with her, and either Jack or Pete were also ringing to bring him in fairly often to consult with something at Torchwood. The Doctor may be on the slow path on Earth, but he was absolutely keeping busy.
As a result, the Doctor and Rose had gotten very familiar with the route from Smithwood to London. Rose didn’t seem to mind all the travelling, although she was discovering (much to her dismay) that she was tiring out much easier these days. The Doctor knew that the increased fatigue was expected and a normal part of this pregnancy, but it still concerned him.
She still enjoyed visiting her mother when they came to town, and the Doctor never minded taking her there - even if he typically didn’t stay behind, himself. He always came to pick her up at the end of the day and usually stayed a couple of hours, sometimes for dinner.
On this particular day, though, the job he had to do for UNIT didn’t take very long and nobody had let Pete - or anyone else at Torchwood - know that he was in town, so the Doctor found himself striding into Jackie’s flat in the late morning.
Rose and Jackie were seated in the lounge, each with a cuppa. Rose had her shoes off and her (slightly puffy) feet kicked up on the coffee table in front of her.
“Doctor!” she cried, craning her head a bit to meet his kiss. “What are you doing here? I thought I wasn’t seeing you until tonight?”
He shrugged, sitting down next to Rose. “Nobody seemed to need me much today, so I thought I’d come tag along with you ladies on whatever adventure you’re going to set out on.”
“You’re looking at it,” Rose said, snuggling into his side. “A fat lot of nothing.”
“That’s not true,” Jackie piped up. “We’re going out in a bit to shop for the Halloween party.”
“I still can’t believe you talked me into having a costume party at our house,” he griped good-naturedly.
“Hush,” Rose said, smiling. “It may be a while before we get to do anything fun again, and it’ll be nice to have all of our friends in one place. Don’t you think?”
He sighed, sounding quite put out. “If you insist.”
“Quit your whining, Doctor,” Jackie broke in, adopting her best mother-in-law voice when she spoke to him.
“Why Jackie, you’re looking lovely,” he said, laying on the charm that seemed to come so easily to this new body. “Have you done something different to your hair?”
“Oh hush, you plonker,” she blushed, sitting back in her chair with the cuppa.
“She lost weight,” Rose volunteered. “About twenty-five pounds in just a couple of weeks.”
The Doctor looked at Jackie, who was frowning at Rose. “How did you lose so much so quickly?”
“Started taking this new medication, didn’t I? Called ‘Adipose’. The fat just walked away.”
“What’d you do that for? And what do you mean ‘the fat just walked away’?”
“It’s their slogan, I didn’t come up with it,” she protested. Jackie narrowed her eyes at him. “What’s it to you?”
“Because that’s a tremendous amount of weight to lose in a short amount of time, Jackie, and I’m concerned. Why do you need to lose weight? You looked fine to me.”
Rose snorted beside him. “Yeah, but you also think I’m gorgeous right now.”
“You are gorgeous,” he replied, nuzzling into her ear. “Good enough to eat,” he whispered, then felt a magazine hit him in the shoulder. “Ow! What was that for?” he yelped at Jackie.
“Stop seducin’ my daughter right in front of me, y’alien git!”
The Doctor muttered something about how Rose was his wife and he would seduce her at his leisure, but sat back to his original position, draping his arm loosely around Rose. He scowled at Jackie, who returned his glare. Rose bit her lip in a vain attempt to hide a smile.
“I still want to know why you resorted to medication to lose weight, Jackie.”
“Got a new bloke, don’t I?” she said, as if the most obvious thing in the world. “And I’m no spring chicken. Gotta keep ‘im interested. S’not like I can regenerate into someone younger and prettier, can I?”
He felt Rose stiffen beside him and her hand clenched in his. “The Doctor is gorgeous no matter what he looks like,” she gritted out. “He was handsome in leather and he’s handsome now.”
The Doctor sniffed, “Quite right, too.”
“Hush, you.” Rose elbowed him in the side, the tension apparently broken.
“Jackie, can I see this medication you’re on?”
“Oh, I quit taking it,” she said.
The Doctor narrowed his eyes again. “Why?”
“No reason in particular,” she answered him, her words a little evasive while she waved her hand dismissively. “Pete found out and gave me the whole song and dance about how he thinks I’m beautiful now, blah blah blah. But I figured if he really does think that, there was no sense in taking the Adipose anymore, s’all.”
“Do you have any of it left?”
“Sure, about half a bottle.”
“Can I see it?”
Jackie cocked an eyebrow. “What for?”
“I just want to make sure you’re safe, Jackie. Honestly.”
It was the truth...mostly.
Jackie got up to go find the bottle, and once she was out of the room, Rose got his attention. “What are you doing?”
“Got a feeling,” he said, trying to keep the excitement from his voice.
Rose raised one eyebrow at him, looking eerily similar to her mother. “A feeling about what?”
“I think there may be something more to this medication than meets the eye.”
She quirked up one corner of her mouth at him. “Caring about your mother-in-law, now, are you?” He just gave her a withering look.
She was laughing when Jackie came back in the room. “See? This is all it is. Adipose.”
“Adipose…” The Doctor took out his specs and put them on, reading the ingredients on the bottle. No, that wasn’t right, that most definitely wasn’t right… “Jackie, how long were you on this?”
“Three weeks, why?”
The Doctor ignored her and turned to Rose. “Grisatetrahydronate isn’t indigenous to the Solar System, much less Earth. Something’s very off here…”
“Copper’s hunch?” she asked, tongue between her teeth.
“Permission to investigate?” he teased her.
She sighed. “Doctor, you just went back to Scotland a couple of weeks ago came back spooked! And now you want to go on another adventure?”
“But Roooose,” he whined, “...it may not even be an adventure! It might just be a little investigating and then I come home to you. And rub your back. And read to you. And cook you some of that tilapia you like. And watch whatever daft show you want to watch on telly.”
“Oi!”
“What?”
“So you’re bribing me?”
“It’s not bribery, Rose, honestly. It’s enticement. Incentives.”
“In other words, bribery.”
“Welllllll….yeah.”
Rose let out a long sigh. “Go. You’ll be impossible to live with if you don’t figure this out.”
He jumped up, then bent down to give Rose a kiss. “Thank you.”
“You’ll stay in touch with me?”
“Always, Rose Tyler.”
“Get out of here, you daftie.”
The Doctor didn’t wait to be told twice.
~*~O~*~
As he drove, the ginger woman in the seat beside him was nattering - again - and the Doctor was doing his best to limit the incredulous looks he was shooting her.
“I knew there was something off about Adipose, I just knew it! So I snuck into the building and got a customer list - said I was health and safety, to pull it off…”
“Clever,” the Doctor said, just testing to see if he could get a word in.
“I know, right? Was rather brilliant of me, glad you think so. So I got the customer list - and went to one of the customers’ houses! Stacey, her name was. Pretty girl, on her way out to break up with her bloke because she said she could do better now that Adipose was helping her lose all the weight. I don’t know what she did for a living, but it could have been ‘interior decorator’ - she did the cutest thing with blank frames in her hallway -”
“Is her decor really the most important part of the story?” he asked, trying to steer her back to the topic at hand. Blimey. Was this what it’s like living with him?
“Oh, right. Yes. She popped off to finish getting ready, and the next thing I knew she was moanin’ and shoutin’ from inside the loo! I thought surely she’d found her bloke hidden away in there and decided for a last tumble…”
The Doctor dragged his hand down his face. “But Adipose came out of her, didn’t it? Little creatures.”
“I think so! When I opened the door, she was gone and there was nothing there but these little marshmallow men waving up at me. Cute little buggers, they were.” She eyed him up and down from the passenger seat. “You didn’t take any of that Adipose, did you?”
“No,” the Doctor said.
“The pills, I mean.”
“I didn’t take anything.”
“Huh.”
He darted his eyes over at her. “Why ‘huh’?”
“Was gonna say you should probably stay away from the stuff. You’re barely thicker than a strip of bacon as it is. There’s no meat that could be pried from your skinny bones.”
The Doctor let out a long-suffering sigh and flicked on his left turn signal. He had a feeling Rose would like this woman, taking the mick as she was. Donna asked him for the upteenth time: “Where are we going?”
“We’re going to pick up the TA - ah, something I need.”
“And we’re going to Kent to do it?”
“Yep,” he said, popping the 'p' as he made the turn. “I need your help with this; you’ve been investigating, so you know what’s been going on. Maybe even than I do about some parts of it. That doesn't happen often, mind. I'm brilliant." Donna made an indelicate snorting sound from beside him, and he furrowed his brow. "But any rate, your insight will be valuable.” He hesitated. “Thing is, Donna, the, ah, vehicle I’m going to get...well, you’ve seen all kinds of things, you said. Believe in aliens and all that?”
Donna snorted again. “Of course I do. Given what we just saw? Of course aliens are real! Not stupid, me.”
“Right. Well, the thing we’re going to pick up, it’s called the TARDIS. That stands for Time And Relative Dimensions in Space.”
“In space?”
“Yes.”
“As in outer space?”
The Doctor cut his eyes over at her. “Yeah. That alright?”
“What’s it like, some rocketship on earth?” she laughed.
“S’not a rocketship," he sqawked, affronted. "It’s a space machine! And time. It’s a time machine as well.”
“You’ve got. A time machine.” It should have been a question but she phrased it, instead, as two statements, using her hands for emphasis.
He cut his eyes over at her again. “Well, yeah.”
“Shut. Up.”
“I didn’t say…”
“Shut up!” Donna shrieked happily. “Oh, I’ve always wanted to go back in time. This is absolutely wizard! Can we go back to my seventh year and tell Soren Blackwell to shut it? Maybe she’ll listen to an adult.”
He shook his head at the road. “No, no, Donna, it doesn’t work like that. And even if it did, we still have this little matter with the Adipose to sort out! It’s dangerous.”
“But you said you haven’t been taking the stuff! Why’s it so important to you?”
“My mother-in-law has been taking it! Not to mention a million other people in the greater London area, if Mrs. Foster is to be believed.”
She turned in her seat and quirked an eyebrow at him. “Mother-in-law?”
He cut his eyes at her. “Yes, her name is Jackie.”
“You sayin’ you’re married?” she scoffed. The Doctor made a little squeak of protest, but Donna went on before he could speak. “If you’re so married, where’s your ring, mate?”
The Doctor blinked. “My ring?”
“Your ring, dodo, your wedding band! Shouldn’t you be wearing one if you’re married?”
“Well….” he rubbed the back of his neck and wished mightily he’d never gotten involved in this conversation. “We’re not actually married. Technically. Legally. Not here.”
Donna snorted a laugh. “Right. Because it’s easier to run around like a single man than tie the knot, eh? Typical.”
“Oi! Just because I’m not wearing a ring and we’re not legally married by your laws doesn’t mean we’re not! We’re just....” Blimey.
“No need to buy the cow if you’re getting the milk for free, eh?” Donna all but sneered.
“Oi!” he said, finally outraged. “S’my wife and children you’re talking about! And we’re getting married next summer. Why would you think that of me, you barely know me!”
“Children?”
“Yeah,” he said, deflating a bit - thinking of the girls always did that to him, it seemed. “We’re pregnant with twin girls.”
Donna ducked her head, her entire demeanor changed. “Sorry. Just… Seen it happen one too many times, I guess. The whole enjoying-the-fruits-but-not-the-labor thing.”
The Doctor’s instincts were tripped, and he looked over at her, noting the resignation in her tone and slouch in her shoulders.
“Had a hard time of it?” he asked in a much gentler tone.
“Dodged a bullet, really,” she said into her lap before she looked up and out the window with a smile. “It was all wrong, anyway.”
The Doctor just waited, and Donna filled the silence. He suspected that this new friend didn’t tolerate silence well.
“There was a man. Lance was his name, and he and I were to be married. He was messing about, though, so I s’pose in the end I’m glad we didn’t get married,” she said, then laughed. “Bet he wouldn’t have minded marrying her.”
“I’m sorry, Donna,” he sympathized.
Donna shrugged. “No matter. I vowed when it was over, I’d live for myself a bit. Maybe do a little traveling. Actually went to Egypt, but it wasn’t nearly as interesting as the history books make it out to be.” The Doctor bit back a scoff. She’d never met Cleo.
“Plus,” Donna went on, “blimey, was it hot. So I came back home and set about looking for work, since Lance was my boss as well. I’ve had a bit of a rough time finding a steady job, but that’s alright. Leaves me free to investigate things like Adipose and run off on mad adventures to Kent with married blokes and time machines, doesn’t it?”
The Doctor chuckled, realizing that he rather liked this woman. Rose would definitely like her. Then he remembered suddenly that he was supposed to check in with said wife. “Need you to text my wife, actually,” he said, pulling out his phone and handing it to Donna. “Her name is Rose, she’s in my contacts. Tell her I said, ‘everything is fine, I met a new friend and we’re going to Smithwood to pick up the TARDIS. I’ll see you tonight’.”
“New friend, eh?”
“Of course! I could always do with more mates.”
She snorted a laugh. “You’re not matin’ with me, sunshine. Seems you’ve already done a bit of that, with twins on the way.”
The Doctor cringed at this not-so-oblique reference to his love life, but didn’t mention anything about it. He just hoped Donna would be a bit less brash when she met Rose - if she met Rose.
Donna’s fingers were like lightning on the screen and he gaped a little. “Blimey, you’re fast.”
“Fastest temp in Chiswick,” Donna said with more than a bit of pride, handing the phone back to him. “A hundred words per minute.”
“Impressive.”
“What’s Smithwood?”
“Hmm?”
“Smithwood. What is it.”
“Oh! S’my house. Well, mine and Rose’s, really. Smithwood Manor.”
“You own a manor?”
“Why is that more shocking than me owning a spaceship?” he wondered.
“Wait a minute,” Donna froze, apparently reaching for a thought. “You own a spaceship.”
“Yes, we’ve covered that.”
“And you said you’re married, but not legally. ‘Not here’.”
The Doctor thought he saw where this was going, but he didn’t let on. “Yeah…”
“And you’ve got that glowstick thing that makes the buzzy noise…”
“Oi! That’s my sonic screwdriver!”
Donna narrowed her eyes at him. “And you’re taking me to your house to pick up your spaceship…”
“The TARDIS, yeah…”
She turned in her seat. “Am I in the middle of a bloody alien abduction?”
The Doctor laughed out loud, rich and hearty. “You’re not being abducted, I assure you.”
“But then, you’re... alien.”
“Yep,” he said, popping the P. “Well,” he cocked his head to the side, considering. “Alien to you, anyway. Problem?”
“Not from me, mate.”
“Oh, so now I’m your mate.”
“If you say so,” Donna shrugged, but she was grinning a little. “Might be a problem for your wife, but that’s between you and her.”
“Nah,” the Doctor replied confidently. “Rose knows I love her to distraction and would never - er - mate with anyone else.”
“Wasn’t talking about that,” Donna said without looking at him. “Was talking about you being an alien. Could have alien bits or something.”
“Oi! I do not!” he denied, forgetting himself for a moment.
“I’d rather not know,” Donna said, holding up a hand. “That’s between you and the missus. Although I still want to see proof that she exists. Honestly,” she looked over at him appraisingly. “You really are a skinny little streak of alien nothing, aren’t you?”
Oh, yes. Rose was going to like this woman quite a lot. The Doctor did, too, come to think of it.
~*~O~*~
Rose watched from her mum’s couch as thousands and thousands of little white blobs floated away, drawn up by beams of light. She knew the Doctor was fine - he’d sent a text telling her to put the telly on the news - so she wasn’t worried about him. What she felt was more along the lines of...sadness. Longing. She wished she’d been there, being a part of everything like she ought to be.
Jackie sat down beside her just as a tear left a sliver streak down her cheek. Her mum took her hand and patted it, bracingly. “Cheer up, love. You’ll be back out there doing God-knows-what in no time.”
“I doubt it,” she pouted. “How could I go putting myself in danger with the girls to think about?”
“You’ll leave the babies with me, of course, so you can go find a spot of trouble with your barking mad husband.”
Rose wiped her eyes. “I couldn’t do that. I couldn’t leave the babies and go with him. And the Doctor needs someone with him. What if he finds someone else to travel with, better than me? What if he just wants me to sit at home while he has mad adventures without me?” she cried.
Jackie put her arms around her daughter and hugged her tight. “Now, now. You know you’ll be back to running around with that nutter in no time. And you know, too, that that husband of yours won’t be leaving you behind.”
“But he met a friend today! What if this new bloke is more adventurous than me? Less jeopardy-friendly? He always complained about how I tend to wander off...”
“Come now, love,” Jackie said, stroking the back of Rose’s head. “There now. The Doctor isn’t about to pick up a stray and leave you at home, now, is he? You know he’s not. You’ve gone and got yourself a case of the vapors, you have.”
Rose snuffled quietly into her mum’s shoulder while Jackie murmured soothing nonsense until her phone went off. She sat up and reached for the phone, lighting the screen.
[Doctor] 06/10/07 - 9:34pm: on our way back. bringing my new friend Donna. you’ll like her. parking the tardis in the alley. love you.
“‘Donna’! His new friend is called ‘Donna’!” Rose cried. “He’s gone and met a girl, mum!”
She wept into her mother’s shoulder, only half-listening to Jackie’s calming assertions that the Doctor would never do something so daft as to go off snogging some woman, and then come back to rub it in her face. “He’d never dare,” Jackie assured her. “God knows the Doctor and I don’t get along all the time, but he loves you, Rose. He truly does. He’d never do that to you - and if he did, he’d have me to answer to.”
Rose just nodded and hugged her mother. She knew all of that, cognitively. Just as she’d known he was the Doctor all along. But sometimes...sometimes the insecurities of being pregnant just got to her. She told her mother as much. “I’m sorry, Mum,” she said, wiping her face. “I know the Doctor would never do anything like that, but my emotions are just all over the place these days. And look at me! You lost weight for Pete, and I just keep growing and growing! What if someone else turns his head?”
“No one else will, Rose,” her mother reassured her with a firm pat to the hand and kiss to the forehead. “And don’t worry about feeling so scattered. When I was pregnant with you, I would cry if your dad told me I looked beautiful because I thought he was lying, and then cry when he didn’t because I thought he didn’t love me anymore. Being pregnant makes you a little barmy. We all understand.”
Rose let her mother brush her tears away, then stood up and went to the loo to dry her face- and, of course, to pee, since it seemed she peed every fifteen minutes or so these days.
A few minutes later, Rose was washing her hands when she heard the Doctor’s voice along with her mother and a voice she didn’t recognize. She stepped out of the loo in time to see her mum following someone - ‘Donna’, she assumed - into the kitchen.
“Rose?”
The Doctor came rushing to her, his eyes bright with concern, one of his hands going to cup her jaw and the other settling gently on her belly. “Rose? What’s wrong, love?”
She lay her hand on his and let her mental walls down, seeking him and his comfort, letting him feel her hurt and loneliness and fear.
His eyes widened then softened as he understood. “Oh, Rose,” he said in a soft, sad voice. “Why do you do this to yourself, love?”
He sent back wave after wave of his love and devotion. She could almost feel him picking up the rejection, hurt, sadness and anger that she’d left lying about and placing them back on the shelf, where they belonged.
“I love you, Rose Tyler,” he murmured, then pressed a kiss to the tip of her nose. She just bathed in the warmth of his love and let him wipe a tear away.
“Oh, sorry,” she heard, and they turned to look at the new voice. A ginger-haired woman in a business suit stood next to Jackie, a smile fading from her lips. “So sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt.”
“No bother,” the Doctor said, turning away from Rose to face the new woman with a smile. The hand that had been cupping her jaw fell to his side and snaked around Rose’s waist. Rose brought her hand up to cover the babies, sizing up the ginger woman. “Was just going to introduce you. Rose, this is Donna Noble. She helped me today with the Adipose. Never would have sorted it without her. Brilliant, she is!” Donna beamed, seemingly pleased with the praise, and Rose smiled politely.
“Donna,” he said with a huge smile, turning to look at Rose and putting his hand back on her belly. “This is my wife, Rose Tyler.”
Rose didn’t miss the way his face softened when he looked at her, nor the stroking of his thumb on her belly.
“And these are our girls!” he looked back at Donna and patted Rose’s belly. “Smidgen and Moppet.”
Donna looked at him curiously. “You named your daughters Smidgen and Moppet?”
“They’re pet names,” Rose spoke up and pointed at the Doctor. “And he came up with them, not me. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Donna,” she said, stepping forward and offering her hand.
Donna shook it with a smile. “Likewise.” She jerked a thumb towards the Doctor, never looking away from Rose. “So this skinny streak of bacon is yours, eh?”
“Oi!”
“Oh, I like her,” Jackie said from the doorway to the kitchen.
“M’not bacon!” the Doctor protested.
Rose smiled. She rather liked seeing the Doctor being wound up, and she felt no threat from Donna - she seemed to be a genuinely good, kind person.
“Yeah, he’s mine. I’ll claim him.”
“Good of you,” Donna said. “If you don’t he might just blow away in a good wind.”
“Oi!” the Doctor shouted - again. Nobody paid him any attention.
“Good to know that you really do exist. I thought he’d made you up.”
“I didn’t make her up!” The women still ignored him.
“No, I exist,” Rose said. “Why would you think he made me up?”
“Because he wouldn’t shut up about you...went on and on, blabbering about his wife and how wonderful she is and how lovely and really, I started to think that perhaps he was having a particularly nice delusion.”
“Oi!”
Rose looked up at him with her tongue between her teeth. “You said nice things about me?”
“‘Course I did,” he huffed. “What else would I say?”
Donna huffed a laugh. “What didn’t he say? Blimey, the gob on this one…”
“Oh, I really like her,” Jackie reiterated. “Can we keep her?”
Rose looked at Donna and caught the twinkle in the other woman’s eye. She beamed. “Yes, I think we rather need more Donna Noble in our lives. Don’t you think, Doctor?”
The Doctor didn’t answer, he was pulling his cheeks down with his hands in a gesture of dismay. “Bloody hell, I should just run and hide now.”
“Don’t even think about it,” Rose grinned up at him. “You owe me a backrub and daft TV show.”
Notes:
Couple of things....
~Someone asked last week about bringing Donna in...and I got that message just after I put this chapter in the 'completed' file in my gdocs! So...I hope you guys like it!
~We're winding down, y'all! According to the outline, there are seven more chapters, but it might go to eight. We'll see how things play out.
~Announcement - THESE GIRLS HAVE NAMES! And oh, I think you're going to love them. They still need middle names, though, so if anyone has a suggestion I'm still taking them!
~There will probably be a supplement/between-chapters interlude this week...it depends entirely on whether or not I can get 36 finished soon. **UPDATE** I made a lot of progress today, so be looking for the supplement tomorrow or Wednesday (more than likely tomorrow)
~Speaking of...Chapter 36 is refusing to be written. I'm struggling with it and doing my best to wrestle it into submission - that's my entire goal for the day - but it may be late this week if I'm not successful.Thank you guys for reading! Your comments mean the world to me. <3
Chapter 36: Celebrations
Summary:
Rose, the Doctor and their family celebrate holidays and more.
Notes:
We're in the home stretch, folks! Almost done!
Chapter Text
*~*~*Thirty-Four Weeks*~*~*
Rose adjusted the banding of her costume for what seemed like the millionth time, trying to get everything just so.
“Rooooose”, came a familiar whine from the other side of the room. “Why do I have to dress up?”
“Because it’s a Halloween party,” Rose replied simply. “Everyone will be dressed up. You need to be, too.” She went back to preening in the mirror. “Besides, you look simply adorable.”
The Doctor wandered into the ensuite, sporting a hodgepodge of clothes that he said were from his previous regenerations. He wore a long, colorful coat with celery pinned to the lapel. Around his neck was the long scarf that Sarah Jane had spoken of several times, and to top everything off, he wore a large hat with a tag in the band.
“The Mad Hatter isn’t supposed to be adorable, Rose, and Time Lords are most certainly much too dignified. They’re austere. They’re serious. They’re solemn. They’re not adorable.”
“Mine is,” she smiled, then stood on tiptoe and kissed the tip of his nose. With a little giggle she wiped off the lippy she’d gotten on him. The Doctor grumbled.
“Cheer up,” she said, patting his cheek then turning around to check her makeup and adjust the banding on her costume just one more time. “It’s only one night, and then you can go back to pretending you never wore any of that on a regular, daily basis.”
~*~O~*~
Rose had come very close to wearing herself out while party planning. Looking around the room at her friends and family, all dressed in various costumes, laughing and talking with each other, she had to say that it had all been worth it.
The only people yet to arrive were Pete and Jackie. Pete had texted Rose and informed her that her mother was having ‘wardrobe trouble’. Rose didn’t envy Pete at the moment - she’d been around enough of her mum’s wardrobe crises to know that Pete was probably a miserable man at the moment.
Speaking of miserable men, the Doctor had cheered up considerably once people began showing up and he got the opportunity to run his gob. It wasn’t often that he got to prattle at his leisure to someone besides Rose, and he was taking full advantage. Rose smiled, chuckling a little at the people he was talking to trying to get a word in edgewise.
He’d whined and complained about having to dress up for the party until Rose had thrown a pillow at him a couple of days before and threatened to regenerate him again if he didn't knock it off. He didn’t stop entirely, but his loud, constant complaints had been reduced to disgruntled mumbling - just low enough that she couldn’t quite catch him at it - and whining just before the party. Now that he had an audience he was positively cheerful. He beamed proudly as he showed off his costume to Sarah Jane.
Sarah Jane, for her part, was dressed as a witch, although her pleasant smile didn’t exactly make her appear ‘wicked’. As she chatted animatedly with the Doctor about his long scarf, her broad smile gave way to a laugh and Rose thought she looked years younger.
“Bet they’re laughing at me,” Mickey grumped from beside her. She turned to smile up at her friend and tried not to snicker at the painted pink nose and whiskers, or the little ears he wore attached to a headband.
“I don’t think anyone’s laughing at you, Micks,” she said loyally.
Mickey and Martha (who was chatting with Shareen and her bloke) looked adorable in coordinating costumes. Martha had dressed as a black cat. In an uncharacteristic show of coupledom, Mickey had donned a pair of fuzzy mouse ears and painted his nose pink with black whiskers. When they’d come in, he’d pointed at the Doctor and warned, in as fierce a tone as she’d ever heard him use, “Not one word.”
The Doctor had made a show of pretending to zip then lock his lips.
Apparently, not everyone had gotten that message.
“Hey, hey, hey! It’s Mickey Mouse!” Jack heralded as he sidled up to them, raising his glass in salute.
Mickey scowled at Jack. “What are you supposed to be, then?”
Jack struck a pose, raising his arms in the air. “Why, I’m Carmen Miranda! Do you like my tutti frutti hat?”
“Would have thought you’d dress like a Captain. Captain Cheesecake.” Mickey tossed out the lame jibe and Jack didn’t seem the least bothered by it, in fact, he actually seemed to revel in it.
“Hello, Ianto,” Rose said pleasantly, taking in his formal suit. “You decided not to dress up this evening? Or are you dressed as Jack’s handler?”
“Oh, he handles me, alright,” Jack smirked.
Ianto ignored him. “I’m dressed as the Prime Minister,” he explained to Rose.
Mickey snorted. “You just didn’t want to dress up,” he said.
Jack and Ianto opened their mouths to retort at the same time, Ianto with a furrowed brow and Jack with a smirk, and Rose interrupted. “If you’ll excuse me, gentlemen, I need to say hello to some other people as well. If you two,” she pointed to Mickey and Jack, ”would please behave yourselves.”
That shut them down effectively (at least until she was out of earshot) and Rose gave them all a smile as she walked away.
Donna was dressed as a flapper and standing over by the fireplace chatting with an older gentleman that Rose had never met. She made her way over to them. “Donna! Hi!”
The ginger-haired woman turned around and smiled brightly at Rose, then they hugged. “Look at you!” she said. “A mummy! Oh, that’s just darling! And clever!”
Rose looked down at herself and smiled: the white dress wrapped in bandages had turned out much cuter than she’d expected it to, and she was pleased. “Yeah, well, it was all I could think of, really.”
“You look beautiful. Rose, may I introduce my grandfather, Wilfred Mott?”
“Pleased to meet you, Mr. Mott. I’m Rose Tyler.”
“Oh please, call me Wilf. Pleasure’s all mine, I assure you. It’s an honor, truly, Donna speaks so highly of you.” Rose smiled pleasantly as the older man bent over her hand and kissed it.
“Well now, Rose, you’re not going to be swept away by this dashing gangster, are you?” the Doctor asked cheerfully from just behind her, and she felt his arm slip around her waist. Rose fought to keep from rolling her eyes at this tiny display. Her Doctor, ever jealous - even of a senior citizen.
“You never know,” she told him with a cheeky grin. “I just might.”
“And I just might sweep her away, too, lovely lass that she is,” Wilf said with a wink to Rose.
Donna swatted Wilf’s arm. “Knock it off, Grandad. Spaceman, this is my granddad, Wilfred Mott. Granddad, this is the Doctor.”
The Doctor extended his hand. “Mr. Mott, welcome.”
“Just ‘Wilf’, and thank you.”
“So you’re Donna’s granddad, eh?”
“That I am,” Wilf said with a huge, proud smile. “Heard a lot about you, Doctor.”
“Oh, good things I hope.”
“Very good. Pleasure to meet you.”
“Pleasure’s all mine,” the Doctor said, beaming and pumping Wilf’s hand again. “Very clever granddaughter you’ve got.”
“Aye,” Wilf said proudly, putting his arm around Donna. “Best granddaughter I ever had.”
“I’m your only granddaughter, Granddad,” Donna interjected with a tone that indicated she’d heard this joke many, many times.
“Makes you the best, now, doesn’t it?”
Rose snickered.
~*~O~*~
She watched as Rose chatted to Donna and Wilf. If she had cared to do so, she would have admitted the "Mummy" costume was really quite clever. Naturally, Rose being young and beautiful, she didn’t look anything like a rotting corpse - more’s the pity. She’d put on a white minidress that clung to her body - despite the large swell of her belly - and then wrapped herself all over with gauze. She managed to be beautiful, cute, seductive and adorable all at the same time.
Cassandra hated her. She despised Rose even more when she thought of the male body she was currently occupying (some caterer’s assistant named Ben that she’d taken over for the sole purpose of getting into the house) and just how un-beautiful, un-adorable and un-cute she felt just then in the tuxedo she was having to wear as a server.
The Doctor was loathe to leave Rose’s side; encouraging her to sit and prop her feet up, offering to get pillows or nibbles. He was solicitous, just short of hovering. And he looked utterly ridiculous in mismatched clothes and a large hat, but she supposed it was Halloween and that’s the way this backwater century did things.
Still, obnoxious as this party had been, it had been informative. She’d been able to slip away and explore the house a bit without anyone noticing, and she’d overheard the Doctor and Rose discussing going to London in the next week, what they had planned there and how much longer there was to go before the babies came: all of which was valuable information for her. She needed to plan, and this party had been a huge help. She congratulated herself on stealing Ben’s body - she’d never approached them as a man before, and they didn’t seem to suspect her.
Cassandra had even had a handsome young man paying her attention, a blonde fellow who’d dressed in long robes with a green emblem bearing a snake on the breast. The young man - Jake, he was called - carried a wand in his hand and had poked the boy dressed as a mouse with it a couple of times, threatening to turn him into a goblet. Jake had chatted her up, making a not-so-veiled innuendo about his ‘wand’.
Cassandra would have leapt on the chance under normal circumstances, but she felt horribly uncomfortable in this male body she’d commandeered for the night - no matter how useful it had been.
“So the mummy,” Cassandra started the next time there was a break in conversation with Jake, looking over at Rose. “She’s the lady of the house?”
“Aye,” Jake said. “Rose.”
“She looks as if she’s about to pop!”
“S’only because she’s carrying twins. She’s still got a few months to go.”
“Poor thing,” Cassandra said, hoping she sounded sincere. “How much longer?”
Jake shrugged. “Sometime towards the end of winter, s’all I know.”
“Will they be having the babies here?” Cassandra asked.
“Dunno. In a hospital, I’d reckon,” Jake answered, taking a sip of his champagne, then giving Cassandra a curious look. “Why are you so interested?”
Cassandra laughed, and was dismayed to hear the deep chuckle coming from Ben’s throat. “Oh I just love babies. They’re so sweet.” The lie was delivered smoothly, and Cassandra was smugly satisfied.
Jake started to say something, but was cut off when the man dressed as a centurion stood, clinked his glass and cleared his throat. “If I could have your attention, please. I’ve an announcement to make.”
The room quieted and looked at him expectantly. Cassandra saw the Doctor put an arm around Rose, who looked confused.
“As you know, Jackie and I have been seeing each other for a while, and we are both very happy.” He held out his hand to the woman in the elegant white dress and laurel crown, and Jackie stood beside him. The centurion put his arm about her.
“We’re so happy, in fact, that we’ll be getting married in two weeks.”
The party-goers squealed and burst into congratulations, but Pete held his hand up to shush them a bit.
“And a few months after that, there’ll be another little Tyler running around, as we’ll be parents.”
The room burst into cheers again, but Rose sat down hard.
“Rose!” The Doctor and Jackie were at her side at once, and Rose looked up at her mother.
“A baby, Mum? Really?”
Jackie nodded at her. “Really. Due in April, around your birthday.”
Rose burst into tears and threw her arms around her mother, who hugged her back just as fiercely. The Doctor, seeing that Rose was alright, kissed the back of her head and stood up to clap Pete on the shoulder. “Good man! This calls for even more of a celebration! Scotch?”
“I’d love some, thanks.”
Jake turned around to ‘Ben’, smiling. “Well, it looks as if you’ll be back for baby showers, eh?”
“Suppose so,” Cassandra said absently.
“That’s good. I’d like to see more of you…”
“Would you now?” Cassandra said, attempting to affect a sultry tone, but losing it in Ben’s unfamiliar, masculine voice.
“Oh, yes. Wouldn’t mind starting tonight, in fact. Could show you that I really know how to use my...wand.”
Cassandra laughed at the blatant innuendo. What the hell, she thought, setting her tray down and following Jake as he led her out of the room..
*~*~*Thirty-Five Weeks*~*~*
The Doctor was dressed and ready to go out shopping, but Rose was, of course, not. Instead, as far as he could tell, she was trying out dresses to wear to her mother’s wedding the following week so that they could shop for one, if needed, when they went to London. If they ever made it to London, that was. This was the third dress she’d tried on. Somehow, she had found something wrong with all of them..
“All I’m saying,” he called into the bathroom from his place on the bed, “is that I don’t understand why you don’t let Pete and your mum go to a judge like they’d planned.”
The Doctor heard her click her tongue, and even though he couldn’t see her, he imagined her rolling her eyes. “Because, Doctor,” she snarked at him, and he grinned to himself at her exasperated tone, “she’s my mum, and I want to see her get married.”
“You already saw her get married once,” he pointed out. “Might I add that she, essentially, married the same man already? And that we were there?”
“That’s different.”
“How is that different?”
“She deserves a nice wedding!”
“She can have a nice wedding other places besides here,” he grumbled.
Rose popped her head out of the bathroom to give him a glare. “What was that?”
“Nothing. I’m delighted.” He gave her a brilliant smile.
“S’what I thought,” she said, satisfied.
He let out a sigh that was indicative of just what a supportive and well-behaved husband he really was, then a corner of his lip quirked up and he crossed his hands behind his head.
“I suppose it will be fun to see them get married a second time. Care to lay a wager about whether he gets her name right this time?”
Rose just rolled her eyes then pointed at him, one finger aimed right at his chest. “Behave.” He smirked at her, and she went back into the bathroom.
The Doctor sighed again, long-suffering. Rose had told him on their first trip together on Platform One that you should never argue with the designated driver. The Doctor had learned through trial and multiple errors that one should never argue with a hormonally-charged pregnant woman.
And now there were going to be two of them! Bloody hell.
“I just can’t believe Mum is getting married next week,” Rose went on. “Or that there’s a baby on the way!”
The Doctor didn’t answer. He had grown a bit bored and was ready to hurry things along - just a bit. He followed the sound of Rose’s voice into the bathroom and walked up behind her, sliding his hands around her waist and covering her belly, putting his chin on her shoulder.
“What do you think of this dress?” She was wearing a black-and-cream gown with lace at the top and flowing chiffon from the empire waist. The Doctor thought she looked lovely, and told her so.
“I don’t feel lovely, I feel fat,” she complained, covering his hands with her own. “Completely huge.” Her lower lip came out in a little pout, and the Doctor wanted to nibble it.
“You’re pregnant, my love,” the Doctor assured her. “But you don’t look fat. Not at all. You look beautiful,” he murmured before he kissed her neck.
Rose’s tongue made an appearance between her teeth when she grinned at their reflection. “You just want to get into my knickers.”
“Might do,” he conceded. “Doesn’t change the facts, though. You’re stunning.”
She turned around in his arms, laying her forearms over his shoulders and linking her fingers behind his neck. “The dress giving you ideas?”
He fairly growled. “Oh, I always have ideas.”
She cocked an eyebrow at him. “You know, I could do with a bath. And we have this gigantic tub over here…”
It was his turn to cock an eyebrow at her. “Why, Rose Tyler. Are you suggesting we bathe together?”
She stood on tiptoe to press her lips to his neck, and he closed his eyes happily. It never failed - Rose could bring him all over wobbly with the lightest touch.
“I’m suggesting we get in the tub together. And maybe - maybe - we’ll get clean after.” She nibbled his earlobe. “Before that, though, I rather think I’d like to be quite dirty in the tub.”
The Doctor felt his knees tremble and he drew a shuddering breath. Sod London. “Whatever my lady wants…” he said, just before he captured her mouth with his own.
~*~O~*~
Three hours later, a worried Doctor sat in Martha’s office, holding Rose’s hand.
“Right. So, when you orgasm, your uterus contracts. Normally that’s not a problem during pregnancy, but given that your uterus has a weak spot, it’s a bit more complicated for you. The muscles of your uterus contracting creates pain. You shouldn’t be straining them. So, to that end, you’re on pelvic rest for the foreseeable future.”
“Pelvic rest?” Rose sounded confused.
The Doctor was blushing furiously. “She means no...you know…” he stammered.
“No sex,” Martha said simply. “Any. Of any kind. Until further notice. Excessive strain could lead to a uterine rupture, and those are very, very serious.”
The Doctor looked grim, but Rose didn’t understand. “How serious?”
“Potentially fatal for both mother and babies.”
“But -” Rose started, but stopped at Martha’s raised eyebrow.
“You’re already looking at bedrest at some point in the future, Rose, I’d take it easy if I were you,” she advised.
The Doctor squeezed Rose’s hand when she opened her mouth to protest, shushing her.
“You can keep your hands to yourself, can’t you Doctor?” Martha teased.
“For Rose and these girls, I absolutely can.”
*~*~*Thirty-Six Weeks*~*~*
The wedding was small and lovely.
Rose had had the formal lounge cleared of its usual furniture and chairs brought in. A florist had placed pink roses all over the room, and each chair was covered in white with a big pink bow. The formal dining room had been similarly decorated, with a large cake and nibbles.
Rose stood with her mother and Jake stood with Pete as they exchanged vows and rings. Jackie’s dress was a simple floor-length skirt with lace covering the top and creating elbow-length sleeves in a pretty off-white. She carried a little nosegay of pink and white roses with sprigs of greenery, and the Doctor conceded to himself that she looked quite lovely.
He, however, couldn’t take his eyes off of Rose. She stood beside her mother in a short, pink dress that draped rather becomingly, holding a small nosegay of pink roses that matched her dress almost perfectly. He and Rose had had a row over her desire to wear heels, and he had eventually won the argument by reminding her that if she fell, she might hurt the babies. She would never admit it, but he was sure that the ballet flats she wore were much more comfortable, anyway.
Watching her as she stood by her mother and brushed away tears, the Doctor thought ahead to their own earth wedding. They’d done nothing in the way of planning, and as beautiful as this little ceremony was, he wanted Rose to have the wedding she’d always dreamed of. He imagined her wearing a white gown and pledging herself to him forever, and his hearts tripped over each other. They’d already given each other their forevers a while back, but it would be lovely to hear it again, this time as they promised each other in front of their friends and family.
Pete and Jackie kissed, sealing their vows, and the small crowd clapped and catcalled for them. The newly-married couple headed down the makeshift ‘aisle’. Rose, beaming, slipped her arm through Jake’s and the two of them followed her mother and new stepfather.
The Doctor stood to go find Rose, but caught an elbow to his side first. “You’re next, Doc,” Jack beamed.
He couldn’t wait.
Chapter 37: Christmastime
Summary:
She couldn’t help but think back to last Christmas. Last year was actually the first time they’d celebrated Christmas together, excepting the time they’d meant to go to Naples on Christmas Eve and ended up in Cardiff. That had been right at the very beginning of their time together.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
*~*~*Thirty-Nine Weeks*~*~*
Rose watched the Doctor as he hung ornaments on their tree and smiled to herself. Her particular method had always been to hang the ornaments where she thought they’d look pretty, but the Doctor wasn’t content to just put the baubles up there willy-nilly. He kept up an endless stream of chatter as he carefully placed each ornament in its optimal spot, judging spacing and how each ornament looked in close proximity to the ornaments surrounding it. Rose had to chuckle at him for his method. It was so...bizarre. But this was the Doctor, and of course he couldn’t trim the tree the same way a normal person would. He was lovable and ridiculous in everything he did, so, of course, he had to be lovable and ridiculous when he trimmed the tree.
She couldn’t help but think back to last Christmas. Last year was actually the first time they’d celebrated Christmas together, excepting the time they’d meant to go to Naples on Christmas Eve and ended up in Cardiff. That trip had been right at the very beginning of their time together.
Last year at Christmas, they’d just made love for the first time a couple of days before, then landed themselves in Jackie’s flat for a week. A week or so after they left, Rose found out she was going to be a mother. A few weeks after that, they’d found out about having twins. Then they’d come to Earth, found out they were having girls, gotten engaged, bonded, settled into a new home (a manor, no less), he regenerated and they went through all of that trauma, then come out stronger on the other side. It had been a hell of a year.
Now the Doctor was decorating their own tree in their home while their daughters played footie in her abdomen.
She was frankly amazed at how far they’d come. And even more amazed that every day, she loved him a little more than she had the day before.
That didn’t mean she didn’t want to throttle him sometimes. He’d withdrawn into himself when Martha had put her on pelvic rest, not snuggling her as much and generally being less affectionate. She’d cried herself to sleep more than one night, alone, convinced that his love was somehow less because she wasn’t able to make love with him. He’d found her crying after a few days and held her until she told him what was wrong. He’d actually laughed when she confessed that she was afraid he wouldn’t love her anymore because they couldn’t sleep together.
“Rose,” he’d said, sobering up, “I went for centuries without having sex. Centuries! And I knew that the day would come during this pregnancy when we wouldn’t be able to make love until after the babies came. Why would you think I’d run out on you for that. Do you honestly think so little of me?”
“Then why have you been avoiding me?” she’d demanded.
“Because you’re too tempting by half,” he’d confessed, catching the protest she was about to utter with his mouth before she could even get it out.
Now, as she watched him trimming their tree, and he continued to mutter to himself about too many reds clustered together, she chastised herself for doubting him. Of course he’d not stopped loving her. In hindsight, she felt foolish for even thinking such a thing.
It seemed that logic had no place in a pregnant woman’s brain.
At least she knew she wasn’t alone, feeling as if she were going mad because they couldn’t have sex. Thankfully though (at least for her), her libido was dropping off simply by virtue of being pregnant and her constant state of discomfort. The poor Doctor didn’t have anything to deter and diminish his libido.
There was a light at the end of the tunnel, though. In just a couple of months, they’d have their girls and be able to start a brand new adventure together.
Rose was more than ready. Slowing down wasn’t in her nature, and she wasn’t pleased to have to do so now.
She’d actually already begun to take it more slowly when Martha had laid down the ‘no-sex’ rule. The planning of the Halloween party had left her tired and sore more often than not, and she’d decided to allow herself more time to rest - even going so far as to hire people to do the majority of Jackie’s wedding. Her body simply demanded that she do less, and she ended up achy, swollen and exhausted if she pushed herself too hard.
She’d still gone to lunch with Donna and Shareen or her mum when she was visiting London with the Doctor, but the marathon shopping trips had become little outings, instead. Most of these were done outside of the Doctor’s approval; he’d much prefer for her to be at home, resting, and made no secret of that. When he found out that she’d done something other than relaxing and...incubating, he always screwed up his face in that little way he had of letting her know he wasn’t pleased. She could see him fighting his own instincts, but he (thankfully) said less than he thought.
That was, until the pain had come again a couple of weeks before.
Rose and Donna had gone shopping together for Christmas, and Rose had found a wall mirror that she thought her mother would like. When she picked it up to show it to Donna, the pain was back, as bad as it had ever been.
It was only through the force of Donna’s personality that the Doctor stayed at UNIT and let them come to him and Martha there, but there was nothing Donna could do to calm him once they arrived and he saw Rose in pain. He’d been panicked, desperate to know that she and the babies were alright, that she hadn’t ruptured.
Once Martha explained that the hernia had simply been aggravated and no damage was done, Rose had watched as he nearly sank to the floor in relief. She’d just let out a huge, grateful sigh of her own. Then less than a beat later he’d been on his feet, angry, ranting at her for being so negligent and shouting about how she needed to be more careful.
He’d carried on with his tirade until Rose was crying and Donna had called him down. Then he’d left in a huff - only to return a couple of minutes later, raining kisses all over her and apologizing for his outburst.
Modified bedrest, Martha had ordered. One hour of rest with feet propped up for every half hour to hour of activity. The Doctor had nodded fervently, grim but victorious at the proclamation that Rose couldn’t ignore.
Rose had simply felt defeated.
Now, however, three weeks later, she refused to admit that she’d probably have worked out a similar plan on her own, regardless of Martha’s orders. Her body simply demanded it.
Besides, there were upsides to all of the additional rest. The Doctor had told UNIT that he would only be available to consult in person when Rose came to visit Martha, and that for anything beyond those few hours per week he’d have to be consulted via telephone. UNIT, of course, acquiesced to his wishes without any complaint. Rose was glad. As much as he hovered sometimes, she preferred to have him around than anyone else.
After her appointments, he’d either take her home or, occasionally, he’d take her back to Jackie and Pete’s new flat with strict instructions for everyone present that Rose was not to do anything. More than one rude look had passed between the Doctor and Jackie, both of whom wanted nothing more than to look after and pamper her. Rose had rolled her eyes at both of them and told them to cut it out.
The Doctor had been attentive and gone to great lengths to keep Rose happy in what she jokingly called her ‘gilded cage’. He’d rubbed her back and swollen feet every night while they watched telly together, and he spent most of his time in bed with a book, saying he wanted to always be there when she woke up. She believed him, of course, but she was also convinced that he simply wanted to be right at hand in case she woke up in pain.
Rose hadn't had many cravings throughout her pregnancy, but boy did she have them now. The Doctor was, once again, a saint. He’d run to the kitchen to make a Caesar salad for her when she woke up at 3am and wanted one, kept her steadily supplied with Dr Pepper (even through his grumbles of disapproval) and had even made a dash to the grocery at half-ten one night because Rose suddenly needed a pear. She’d been amazed when he came home with a bagful; she’d fully expected him to balk at the last minute. He’d snorted at her lack of faith in him, but confessed that he considered that buying the much-maligned fruit for her was the ultimate show of his devotion.
“There,” he announced, breaking into her thoughts and sounding very pleased with himself. He stood back from the tree and put his hands on his hips, surveying his work. “Look, Rose. Every bauble and decoration is placed in the optimal position in relation to each other and the fairy lights. Everything is spatially sound and perfectly placed - oh, I like that, great alliteration, ‘spatially sound and perfectly placed’ - why are you laughing, Rose?”
“You,” she told him on a giggle. “You’re just cute.”
“Time Lords aren’t -”
“Time Lords aren’t cute. Yeah, yeah, I know,” she soothed him, then held out a hand for him. He followed the gentle pull of her hand until he was beside her, his arm around her shoulders. Rose curled her legs under her as best she could and lay against his shoulder, making herself as comfortable as possible.
“I just want to give you the best possible Christmas, is all,” he grumped.
“It’ll be brilliant,” she smiled at him, then kissed his scowl away.
He sighed, a content little sound, and nuzzled her. “What were you thinking about when I was hanging the baubles?”
“Nothing, really,” she said, looking at the tree. “Just trying to figure out what you were doing most of the time.”
“Don’t try to pull the wool over my eyes, Rose Tyler. You were ogling my bum. Admit it.”
She laughed at this, then gave him another little kiss. “You got me. I’m such a ball of hormones that I can’t help but eye your bum every minute of the day.”
“I knew it!” he crowed, and Rose laughed again before he settled her back down into his side and kissed the crown of her head. “But really, what were you thinking about? You looked serious.”
“Did I? I didn’t mean to. I was just thinking back on the last year - and the year before.”
“Last year, we had Christmas at your mum’s, didn’t we?”
“Mhm, we did. Mum made turkey and candy potatoes.”
“Do you think she’d make the turkey this year?”
“Liked my mum’s turkey, did you?”
“I did,” he said, and Rose tittered at him. “What?”
“Just thinking that last year this time, you didn’t want anything to do with my mum.”
“Well, things are different now, aren’t they?”
“That they are.”
He nuzzled into her ear. “Last year, at Christmas, we’d just made love for the first time.”
Rose blushed. “Yes, and we’d made these girls, although we didn’t know it yet.”
“Best decision I ever made, seducing you.”
“You seduced me?” she demanded, then laughed. “I seem to remember spending nearly an entire year flirting with you, touching you, curling up into you while you read or we watched telly…”
“Yes, that was me seducing you.” He sounded self-satisfied, clearly thinking his answer was the final answer.
Rose was put out. “And I suppose you’re going to tell me that when I asked you to dance during the Blitz, that was you seducing me as well?”
“No,” he said patiently, as if explaining something very obvious. “You asked me to dance, that’s true. But only because I’d seduced you already by that point. I’d used my mysterious, aloof brand of charm on you, and you were smitten.”
“Smitten!” She snorted. “I was madly in love with you, I’ll grant you that - no denying it, really - but you did not seduce me, Doctor. In fact,” she cut off whatever denial was on his lips, “I distinctly remember you walking me to my room that night and leaving me there with just a kiss on the forehead.”
“See? Seduction. Always leave ‘em wanting more, Rose Tyler.”
Rose clicked her tongue at him, but settled back into the crook of his shoulder. “You’re barmy, you are.”
“I might be barmy, but it worked, didn’t it?”
She grinned up at him and he kissed her smile. “Yeah. I’d say it worked.” He was smiling when she pulled away, and she settled back into his side.
“Are you sure you’re up for having your entire family here for Christmas?”
“It’ll be fine, Doctor. I’ll just make you do all the work,” she grinned.
“Good.” He was quiet for a minute, then spoke up. “Your mum’ll come make her turkey, right?”
Rose giggled. “Yes, she’s coming to make her turkey.”
“Molto bene!”
“She's coming more and more and staying longer and longer, you know. It’s just a matter of time before she wants to come stay around the clock to take care of me.”
The Doctor sighed. “I know. I don’t like to think about it.”
“Cheer up,” Rose encouraged him. “I think she’d be here already if she weren’t a pregnant newlywed.”
“Thank Rassilon for Pete, then,” the Doctor deadpanned, then yelped when Rose swatted him.
They sat quietly for a little while, just enjoying the fire and each other’s company. Rose felt herself start drifting towards sleep, but the Doctor’s voice startled her.
“Rose?”
“Hmm?”
“Should I be wearing a ring?”
She furrowed her brows in confusion. “A ring?”
“Yes. A wedding ring.”
“Why are you asking this, all of the sudden?”
He shrugged, moving her head just a little when he did. “When I met Donna, she didn’t believe we were married because I wasn’t wearing a wedding band. I just wondered if I should.”
“Well, an exchange of rings usually happens at the wedding ceremony - the earth version - and that hasn’t happened yet.”
“I know, I know. I just..." He sighed. "I don’t know. I just wondered if you thought I should be wearing one.”
Rose pondered for a second. “Doctor, do you want me to want you to wear a wedding band?” He stammered, and Rose knew that she’d caught him out. She decided to have mercy on him. “If it’ll make you feel better to wear a ring, then we’ll get you a ring. But I don’t need it to feel secure in you. I can wait until June, like we’d planned.”
“Are you sure that’s what you want?”
Rose shrugged. “I’m not going to lie and say I’m not looking forward to the day that you’re mine and the whole world knows it,” she said, “But I can wait. I feel like you having a plus-one who’s actually a plus-three is a bit of a giveaway.”
“You were never just my plus-one, Rose,” he said, solemn.
She gave him a sweet kiss. “I know. We belonged together, right from the beginning.”
“Quite right, we did.” He pulled her close to him.
“I’m ready to get to that day, though,” she confessed. “We haven’t planned anything yet.”
“Sure we have,” he said. “We’re getting married here.”
“But we haven’t done anything else. Haven’t looked at flowers, haven’t talked about attendants. You couldn’t wear a ring right now just because we haven’t picked one out yet.”
“Well, I suppose that’s true.”
Rose sighed and snuggled into him a bit more. “At least we have the catering company selected.”
“I told you, if we keep it small I’ll do the cooking myself.”
She snorted. “Not likely. Besides, Jake might kill me if I don’t bring back the caterers. He was rather fond of one of them at Halloween and mum’s wedding.”
“Is Jake going to be as bad as Jack?”
“God, I hope not!” she laughed. “Is that even possible?”
“Rose?”
“Hmm?”
“I think you should stay Rose Tyler. After we’re married.”
“Oh?”
“Yes,” he nodded, threading his fingers through hers. “Smith is not my name, so it really shouldn’t be yours, either. John Tyler was an American president, and a right bastard, to boot. So I’d rather not take that name if I can help it.”
“We could be Tyler-Smiths.”
“We could, I suppose. But I like the way your name sounds as it is.”
“Well,” she said, threading her fingers through his. “We have time to think about that.”
“That we do. I’m just ready to be married to you in the eyes of the law, is all.”
“Donna thinking we weren’t really married really shook you up, didn’t it?”
“A bit.”
She kissed the tip of his nose. “I’m ready to be married to you, too, Doctor. But more than that, I’m ready to have these babies.”
The Doctor didn't say anything, and she sensed he was troubled. “Doctor? You alright?”
“Me? M’always alright,” he responded, his voice bright.
“Out with it,” she demanded, sitting up and away from him.
“Out with what?”
“You’re fretting about something. Anytime you say ‘I’m always alright, I know that you most certainly are not. So go on, then. Tell me.”
He didn’t say anything, then heaved a heavy sigh. “Oh, alright.”
Rose waited for a minute or so, but he didn’t say anything. “Well?”
“I’m worried about you, is all. Wellll,” he tugged his ear, “maybe ‘worried’ is the wrong word. I’m sure you’re going to pull through just fine. I’m more...guilty, actually.”
“Guilty?” She was taken off guard.
“Yes, guilty. You’re pregnant with the girls, and it’s going to hurt you when they’re born. No matter how they come out, it’s going to hurt you.”
“Doctor, that’s just how childbirth works,” she said patiently. “Every species we’ve ever encountered has had some kind of pain when they have a live birth.”
“Except the Time Lords,” he reminded her.
“Except the Time Lords,” she conceded.
“And that’s just it, Rose! These are Time Lord babies, little Time Ladies. Their birth is not supposed to hurt their mother, yet I’ve hurt you. I've already hurt you!”
“How have you hurt me?” she demanded.
“Welllll,” he tugged on the back of his neck, “not yet, I don't suppose. But the babies are already making you uncomfortable. You can barely sleep at night anymore!"
Doctor," she soothed, "That's just what being pregnant is like. It's no big deal."
"But it is a big deal! You're miserable and it's my fault. And then when the babies are born... I put the babies there, and they’re going to hurt you. Are hurting you. I did this to you.”
“As I remember it, Doctor,” she said with her tongue between her teeth, “we did it to each other.”
“Cheeky.”
“You love it.”
“Always,” he agreed. “But I’m going to be causing you pain, Rose. Don’t you see? All I ever want to do is keep you safe and happy, but you’re going to be in pain because of something I did. Already are.”
“Doctor, if you’re regretting this, it’s a bit late.”
“No, not regret. Just...worry.”
“I am safe and happy, Doctor.”
“But you’re not, Rose!” he exclaimed. “Having these babies is dangerous. Having a baby anytime is dangerous, but you're carrying twins, and then Time Lord babies are more taxing on a mother’s body. You’re starting to see that now, I think. What if something happened to you when you’re having them? I couldn't stand it. And then there are the people who keep cropping up and asking questions about you…”
“Was there another one?”
“Some bloke at a pub tried to chat Donna up, said he’d seen her out earlier in the day with her pregnant friend.”
“What did Donna say?”
“She threw her drink in his face and told him to sod off. I believe her exact words were, ‘Fuck off, mate’.”
Rose chuckled at the mental image, and her friend’s protective instinct. The Doctor broke into her thoughts. “So you see, I have good reason to be worried about you. There’s danger lurking about.”
“Doctor, I’m fine. I’m healthy and happy.”
“But you’re not, Rose. You’re getting more and more uncomfortable all the time. I did that to you.”
“Allow me to remind you - again - that we did this together.” Her voice was a bit sharp in her ears, but she wanted him to understand.
He scrubbed his face with one hand. “I know that, I know.”
“Doctor, everything is going to be fine, yeah? I'm no so uncomfortable that I can't stand it. I mean, you've dragged me into much more uncomfortable spots than this," she indicated her large belly, and he gave her a wan smile. "In just a couple of months, we’re going to be a happy little family of four. And when we finally get Smidgen and Moppet in our arms, it’ll all be worth it.”
“You think?” He sounded a bit unsure.
“I know so,” she answered. “And think - next year this time, we’ll have two little ones, toddling around, pulling the baubles off that tree you worked so hard on.”
He gave a big, false groan. “I suppose they will be into everything, won’t they?”
“Well,” Rose grinned at him with her tongue back between her teeth. “They’re predestined to be mischievous little girls. Just look at their father.”
“Oi!”
Notes:
You guys are the best readers in the world. Just...I'm in awe of you.
Four more chapters! We're in the final push!
Chapter 38: The Baby Shower
Summary:
Rose's baby shower.
Notes:
The existence of this chapter and the fact that it's going up on time is a miracle.
Three more chapters to go!
Chapter Text
*~*~*Forty-Five Weeks*~*~*
“I mean it, Rose, if he doesn’t leave…” Jackie had both hands on her hips on either side of her slightly rounded belly, her jaw set firmly and her eyes were boring into her son-in-law.
Rose sighed, blowing her bangs out of her eyes, trying to contain her frustration. “Mum, I can’t just kick him out of his own house, you know.”
“You want me to do it?” Jackie offered, testily. “I’ve no problems.”
The Doctor snorted. “I’d like to see you try.”
“Don’t antagonize her,” Rose snapped, and the Doctor fell back into the stubborn, arms-crossed stance he’d adopted when Jackie started demanding he leave.
“Rose,” Jackie said, sounding more wheedling and pleading now, obviously trying a different tactic. “It’s your baby shower.”
“Yeah,” the Doctor retorted, immediately forgetting to be quiet. “And they’re my babies.”
Jackie gave a derisive laugh. “I don’t see you carryin’ ‘em, mate.”
Rose blew out a heavy, exasperated breath as the two most important people in her life bickered with each other - again - from either side of the love seat she was occupying. The two of them had become increasingly hot-tempered towards each other since it had become more and more difficult for her to get around. She’d been spending additional time off her feet, relying on help from others more every day. The Doctor and Rose had just managed to keep Jackie from moving in - so far - but Rose felt certain that the time that her mother could be put off was drawing to a close.
“What’s she need a baby shower for, anyway?” the Doctor mumbled for the umpteenth time. “Haven’t we already got everything these girls could ever possibly need? And if we don’t, the TARDIS will provide it.”
“That’s not what this is about, you ruddy, stupid alien!”
“Mum!”
“Oi!”
Jackie had worked herself into a snit, and Rose shifted in her seat, prepared to stand between the two of them if necessary.
“Mum, that was rude. You know that was over the line. No call for that.”
“He’s being stubborn, Rose!”
“And so are you!” she snapped. “Now listen, both of you,” she demanded, looking from one ot the other. “I am ten months pregnant. Everything on my body aches and is swollen. I can’t see my feet and haven’t for months. I waddle now. I can’t sleep, I belch all the time, and I spend the better part of every day running to and from the loo. To sum up: I’m sick of being pregnant, I feel like shit, and I honestly don’t feel like putting up with a bunch of shit from either of you!”
Jackie crossed her arms and set her jaw, looking away. The Doctor looked mildly chastened.
“You are my two favorite people in all of time and space and I hate to see you fight. Now, if you don’t mind, knock it the hell off.”
Pete had apparently been alerted by the noise and rounded the corner, taking in the scene. Rose looked at her stepfather with pleading eyes, and he took a deep breath before he went to Jackie.
“Jacks, c’mon. You know what Dr. Kohl said about your blood pressure.”
Jackie ignored him. “But he doesn’t understand, Rose! That’s what’s so alien! This day is supposed to be about you, so your friends and family can shower you with affection and gifts before the baby comes! We don’t need your bloke here for this!”
“He’s not my bloke, Mum,” Rose said in a low voice that indicated she was intentionally being calm, putting her hand on the Doctor’s arm to stop him from saying whatever had sprung into his mind. “He’s m’husband. And the father of these babies.”
“See?” the Doctor challenged, putting his hand on Rose’s shoulder, apparently having decided himself the winner. Jackie huffed.
Rose turned to look up at him. “Doctor, go.”
He goggled at her, his eyes wide in shock from her betrayal. “What!? But Roooose…”
She held her hand up to stop him, then lay it on his hand, curling her fingers around it, softening the blow. “I know you want to be here and I know you love me and the girls and I know, Doctor. I know. But Mum is right, to a point. This is meant to be an afternoon for the girls. You go out with the guys! They’ve made plans to take you out for something of a stag night.”
“I don’t want to,” he pouted. “What if you need me?”
Pete slipped his arm around Jackie’s waist and led her away. “C’mon, Jacks. Let’s give them a minute.”
Rose waited until they were gone and pulled the Doctor down beside her, lifting his arm so that it would encircle her. “Doctor,” she started.
He interrupted her. “Rose, I really don’t want to go. I want to stay here with you.”
“I know you don’t want to, but I’ll be fine, Doctor. Really.”
He sighed. “I know you’ll be fine, I just...I don’t like being away from you right now. Can you understand that?”
“I can. I don’t like being away from you, either, not with only a few weeks to go. But this is a wonderful opportunity for me to see some of my friends. I’ve not seen some of these girls in a long while. I’d like to spend some time with them, while I still have time to spend.”
“That’s lovely! Great! Molto bene! Why do I have to leave for you to be able to see them and spend time with them?”
“It’s tradition, Doctor.” He started to say something, but she nuzzled into him and cut him off. “It’s not just that, though. It’s something that I want, too. I’ve been to lots of baby showers growing up, yeah? And every one I’ve been to, it’s always been women sitting around talking about babies and treating the mum-to-be like a princess. I always wondered what it would be like to be in her shoes, you know? Now is my chance - we may not do this again, two may be plenty. So I want to do this, now. Please?”
He didn’t say anything for a moment, just let her talk. Finally, he tipped her chin up to look at him.
“I’m going to go. Everything in me is screaming to stay with you. But I’m going - only because I love you and can’t say no to you.”
She smiled up at him, and he bent down to kiss her smile. “Thank you, Doctor.”
“You owe me one.”
“I owe you everything, Doctor, but not for this. For this, I owe you squat.”
Jack stepped into the lounge and clapped his hands once. “Is the dad-to-be ready to go make some trouble?”
The Doctor scowled at Jack, then looked back at Rose.
“Go,” she said, giving him one more quick kiss. “I’ll save you some cake.”
“With edible ball bearings?”
“With edible ball bearings,” she agreed.
“Oh, alright then.” He stood up and slipped on his coat, then pointed at Rose. “But the next time your mum and I row, I expect to win.”
“Don’t count on it, mate,” Jackie snarked from the next room.
~*~O~*~
[Rose] 22/01/08 - 4:34pm: how are things?
[Jack] 22/01/08 - 4:36pm: great! the dancing girls should be here any minute.
[Rose] 22/01/08 - 4:37pm: haha
[Rose] 22/01/08 - 4:37pm: how’s Doctor?
[Jack] 22/01/08 - 4:39pm: oh you mean the oncoming killjoy?
[Rose] 22/01/08 - 4:42pm: that bad, huh?
[Jack] 22/01/08 - 4:43pm: he’s pouting
[Rose] 22/01/08 - 4:45pm: shall I call and talk to him?
[Jack] 22/01/08 - 4:46pm: nah, he’ll be alright. another two beers and he’ll be having fun. we may do shots
[Rose] 22/01/08 - 4:49pm: drink one for me
[Jack] 22/01/08 - 4:50pm: Rosie, for you, I’ll drink two
[Rose] 22/01/08 - 4:51pm: thank you for your sacrifice
[Jack] 22/01/08 - 4:54pm: I’m a giver
~*~O~*~
Jack pocketed his phone and went to the bar. The Doctor was there, parked in the same stool he’d been in since they arrived a little over an hour ago. Jack got the impression that he was just counting down the minutes until he could go home to Rose.
He slapped his hand on the Doctor’s shoulder and slid into the seat next to him. “Cheer up, buttercup. You’ll be back home to her soon.”
“You’re the only person that might have any hope of understanding, I don’t expect the rest of this lot to.” The Doctor waved over his shoulder at Jake, Mickey, and Pete. “But my mind and entire body is screaming to go back home to her, right this instant. Not to let her out of my sight.”
“Premonition?”
The Doctor shook his head around his sip of cider. “No. Cognitively, I know that nothing’s going to happen to her. She’s fine; she’s there with her mother and her OB-GYN, for heaven’s sake. The only thing that could make her safer is if you and I were there. I know all of that, Jack, I know it. But the thing is, I can’t make myself understand it.” He took another sip of his cider. “No matter how much I tell myself that, my instinct is still to be right by her,” he gestured and emphasized with his hands, “directly by her side. Not to leave her.”
Jack flagged down the bartender, ordering more drinks, then turned to the Doctor. “I’m not going to try to convince you everything is fine, because if you can’t convince yourself there’s nothing I can do to persuade you. But I am going to shove drinks down your throat until you lighten up.” The Doctor made a noise to protest but the bartender interrupted by setting down two shots of whisky.
“Now,” Jack said, sliding one of the shots over in front of the Doctor. “The way I see it, Rose sent us out here to celebrate.”
“She didn’t send me out to get drunk, Jack,” he griped.
“So much you know. She wanted you to loosen up and have a good time.” The Doctor just rolled his eyes. “But as I was saying, she sent you out here to celebrate, and I think that calls for a toast.” He nodded towards the Doctor, indicating that he should pick up his shot glass. The Doctor rolled his eyes again, but picked it up.
“To family,” Jack declared, “specifically the families you create around yourself.”
“Cheers,” the Doctor said before downing his shot.
Jack looked over his shoulder. “Speaking of…” he said quietly.
“Oh, are we doing shots?” Mickey walked up behind the two, putting one hand on each of their shoulders.
The Doctor just grumbled.
~*~O~*~
The cake did, indeed, have edible ball bearings, but Rose didn’t think she was going to be able to get a piece for the Doctor before it was all gone. She did, however, manage to ask Donna to grab a couple of the cookies that looked like pink converse to save for the Doctor.
She’d been surprised by the turnout to her shower, especially given how absent she had been in most of these people’s lives over the last couple of years. Her mum was there, of course, as were Donna, Martha, and Sarah Jane. Shareen had come and brought Tricia Delaney, and Rose was glad to see her old friends. Honestly, Rose would have been happy to just have that small group around her. It would have felt more intimate to her, she thought.
It seemed, though, that her mum had invited half of the estate - and that all of them had shown up. Most of the people milling around were the people that Rose knew. She recognized childhood friends and some people that her Mum knew from work, but there were a few faces that were completely unfamiliar to her. It made her distinctly uncomfortable, and she kept Donna, Martha, or Sarah Jane by her side at all times.
Jackie was in her element. She, herself, was about two thirds of the way through her pregnancy, and had just found out that she and Pete were going to be having a little boy that they planned to call “Tony”. She was having a marvelous time expounding on the joys and miseries of pregnancy to the crowd of people around her. Rose didn’t mind - she was much more content to sit on the love seat next to one of her friends and chat quietly. She didn’t feel the need to be the center of attention, but her mother thrived on it.
The shower had been a bit different than she was expecting, honestly. The food was amazing, the catering company had done an amazing job. The decorations were stunning, and she had Martha and Donna to thank for that. There were games and they seemed fun - although she didn’t participate. She’d had tons of people come talk to her where she sat, but it all felt shallow, like there was no connection between herself and the people she was talking with. It just didn’t feel the way she always thought it would.
Rose didn’t know if it was because she’d been gone so long and had seen miracles and wonders that made a baby shower in Kent seem mundane, or maybe she just had such limited movement at the moment and thus wasn’t able to socialize as well. Maybe part of it was Jackie also being pregnant and inadvertently stealing a bit of Rose’s thunder. She’d been pampered, surely, but it wasn’t quite the whirlwind of pink she had expected. She couldn’t complain but...it was almost as if she felt like she didn’t belong amongst the people who were walking around her house.
Looking over at her mum, who was, herself, a whirlwind in a pink ‘grandmother’s’ corsage, Rose figured she didn’t mind being disappointed this time.
“So, how are you feeling?” Sarah Jane asked, plucking a glass of champagne from a passing server then taking the empty place next to Rose on the loveseat.
“Alright, I suppose,” she said, stroking her belly absently. “Tired of being pregnant.”
“How much longer for you?”
Rose looked around the room to make sure no one was listening in, then answered in a low voice. “Time Lord pregnancies are supposed to go for fifty-four weeks, and I’m at forty-five. So, hypothetically, nine more weeks. Martha says that twins tend to come earlier, though, and given...well, given that I’m human, she expects I’ll have them before that.”
Martha had a seat in a nearby chair while Donna sat on Rose’s left side, offering her a glass of punch. “That’s true,” Martha confirmed. “I think we’ll have a pair of baby girls very soon.”
“I know I’m the new girl in this little circle, but I’m quite excited to get my hands on a little, wee one,” Donna said, popping a pastry in her mouth.
Sarah Jane smiled politely at Donna. “Do you want children of your own?”
Donna made an indelicate little sound. “Not me, not yet. I prefer to be Auntie Donna. Spoil ‘em rotten and send ‘em back, that’s my method.”
The little group of ladies laughed, and Rose felt her own contentment mix with the twins’.
“Have you picked out names?” Martha asked.
“We have,” Rose confirmed, “we’ve given them both lovely names. I’m delighted with them. But we’re keeping them a secret until the girls get here. Only Jack knows.”
“Jack?” Donna looked surprised.
“Why Jack?” Martha asked. “I’m their doctor…”
“Well, yes, Jack fancies himself responsible for the Doctor and I being together. Says if he hadn’t come along, the Doctor never would have gotten off his arse and made a move.” Rose laughed. “Do you know, I think he may be right.”
“He certainly seems excited about becoming an ‘uncle’,” Sarah Jane smiled. “He’s almost as excited for these girls as the Doctor.”
Donna snorted. “Nobody’s as excited as the Doctor. How’d you get him to leave, anyway?”
“Mum threatened him with bodily harm. And when that didn’t work, I said ‘please’.”
Martha laughed. “I’ve never seen a dad quite so ridiculous over impending fatherhood, and I thought I’d seen it all.”
“He went on for almost an hour the other day on the fact that you can wear babies now,” Donna said, rolling her eyes. “I told him, ‘Doctor, Rose is wearing those babies now. She’s not going to want to strap them right back on.’ He told me he wasn’t talking about you, he’s going to wear them himself!”
Sarah Jane looked shocked and amused. “Are you serious?”
Donna made an ‘x’ over her heart. “Hope to die. And Jack said he’d be wearing the other one!”
The women laughed together at the mental image of the Doctor and Jack with babies strapped to their chests. “It’s true though,” Rose said, “the Doctor and Jack are both positively beside themselves over these girls.”
Rose winced and shifted in her seat, and Sarah held out her hands, to offer help.
“Are you alright, dear?’
“M’fine,” Rose smiled. “Just have to go to the loo.”
She shifted, preparing to stand, and she accepted the help that both Martha and Donna offered.
“Do you need me?” Martha asked, looking at her carefully.
Rose shook her head. “M’fine. Just need to pee. I’ll be right back.”
Martha nodded and kept her hand on Rose’s elbow for a moment longer. Rose stepped out of the little circle they’d been sitting in and turned back, looking around at her three friends. “Can I get anyone anything while I’m up?”
Donna gave a little laugh. “Leave it to you to offer to take care of people at your own party.”
“We’re fine, Rose,” Sarah Jane said graciously. “Are you sure you wouldn’t like someone to go with you?”
She waved a dismissive hand. “Nah, I’m fine. It’s just the loo. No big deal.”
“We’ll be here when you get back,” Martha said.
Rose didn’t have time to wait and answer, she just waved over her shoulder while she waddled to the loo.
~*~O~*~
Jack was rather proud of his handwork, if he said so himself.
He had cut himself off after one drink a couple of hours ago, and he’d had the bright idea to channel the drinks meant for him to the Doctor, in an attempt to loosen him up. It had worked gloriously.
Jack had proposed toasts for everything he could think of. They drank to the Doctor, to Rose, to each of the girls, to friendship, to nights out with friends. If it seemed like something that could be toasted, Jack shoved a shot in front of the Doctor while Mickey, Jake, and Pete each took a swig of their beer.
The end result was a pleasantly tipsy Time Lord who was currently taking much delight in soundly thrashing Mickey at billiards.
“It’s all physics and geometry,” the Doctor was saying, only slightly slurred. “And I happen to be an expert in both of those things. Really, there’s no reason for you to be ashamed that I keep running the table, Mickey.”
Jake and Pete, also nicely buzzed, just laughed and encouraged one or the other on.
Jack was rather pleased with himself, indeed.
His phone buzzed in his pocket, and he pulled it out to look at it.
“Hello, Donna,” he said with undisguised cheer in his voice. “What can I do for you? Please say it’s kinky.”
“You need to come home and bring the Doctor. Something’s wrong with Rose.”
Chapter 39: Resolutions and Revelations
Summary:
The Doctor returns to Smithwoood.
Notes:
This is the penultimate chapter. Only one more chapter to go. Thank you so much for reading!!
Chapter Text
The Doctor spent the time on the way back to Smithwood mentally chastising himself, while Jack was breaking every traffic law known to man .
He’d known better. He’d known he shouldn’t have left Rose behind, but he’d allowed himself to be convinced that she would be okay. To be fair, he’d honestly had no real indication that something would go wrong, only the overwhelming urge to be right by her side. Things had been so quiet and peaceful, he’d let himself believe Rose and Jackie and Jack and everyone when they told him he should lighten up and go have fun.
Just for one evening, they’d said.
Then Jack’s phone had rang.
What a fool he’d been.
The Doctor had immediately used his superior physiology to burn through the alcohol he’d consumed when he’d realized something was wrong, but Jack still wouldn’t let him drive back to Smithwood, stating outright that he was too dangerous to drive at the moment. Had he been able to think more clearly, the Doctor would have realized that Jack’s own mental state wasn’t much better. As it was, he didn’t care. He just had to get to Rose.
Rose was in trouble. Donna hadn’t told Jack much at all, only that something was wrong with Rose and that she was acting out of character. The Doctor had drilled him for more information anyway, demanding answers that Jack didn’t have until Jack finally snapped at him to shut the hell up and let him drive.
Jack whipped the SUV into the long driveway and sped towards the house. The Doctor jumped out of the car before it even stopped moving and sprinted to the door, throwing it open.
“Where’s Rose? What’s going on?”
Donna rushed forward to meet him. “Doctor, listen -”
“Where’s Rose?” he demanded, ignoring her.
“Doctor…” Donna started again, following after him.
The Doctor ploughed past her, looking into empty rooms off the foyer. “I don’t have time for fucking chit-chat!” he nearly shouted at her, forgetting himself and his surroundings. He felt only the slightest bit chastened when a few people turned to look at him reprovingly.
He should have known Donna wouldn’t take kindly to that. She grabbed him by the arm and yanked him back towards her. “Oi! Spaceman!” she chastised him from between clenched teeth. “Nobody knows that anything is wrong but me, Martha and Sarah Jane. Everyone else thinks everything's all hunky-dory. So get over here and talk to me so you know what you’re dealing with, Dumbo!”
The Doctor gave her his most Oncoming Storm-worthy glare, but Donna didn’t flinch. Her jaw was set and her eyes flashed at him just as much as his likely flashed at hers. He admired her, grudgingly. She was right, he knew, and her instincts were good, but that didn’t help him one iota at the moment.
“What is it then?” he hissed, knowing as he said it that he would regret his tone and apologize later. “Hurry up!”
“You need to be calm when you go in there. You’ll only make things worse if you go in to talk to her like this.”
“Tell me quickly what’s happened,” he said as Jack came skidding to a halt beside him, Mickey, Pete and Jake close on his heels.
“Rose went to the loo. She was gone a while, but nobody thought much about it. When she came back out she was acting...differently.”
“Just saying ’differently’ doesn’t tell me what I need to know! Differently how?”
“Oi, don’t get stroppy with me, Spaceman, I’m trying to help!”
The Doctor took a deep breath to calm himself and then continued. “I know, and I’m sorry. Please, just finish, alright?”
Donna looked mutinous, but went on. “I don’t know how to explain it. It’s Rose, but she’s just...different. Her mannerisms, the things she says...even her voice sounds a bit different. It’s like there’s a different person inside of her.”
The Doctor felt his mind whirling, and Jack broke into his thoughts. “How is that possible, Doc? Who could do that?”
“I don’t know,” he said through gritted teeth, “but I mean to find out.”
~*~O~*~
Rose was sitting in the same seat he’d left her in a few hours before. Martha and Sarah Jane were sitting around her with concerned, alarmed looks on their faces. Even if Donna hadn’t told him, he’d have instantly known something was wrong with her. Her posture was different, the look on her face was almost a smirk - a smirk that intensified when she saw him in the doorway.
“Oh, Doctor, hello!” she cooed. “Did you miss your bonny bride?”
“Jack, get everyone out of the house,” he muttered over his shoulder in a low voice.
“Everyone?” Jack returned just as quietly.
“If they know I’m a Time Lord, they can stay.”
Martha and Sarah Jane looked from him to Rose with wide eyes, and then back to him. He nodded at them.
The Doctor saw Jack’s curt nod from the corner of his eye. “C’mon, ladies. Help me clear the house,” then Jack was gone, taking Martha and Sarah Jane away from Rose’s waspish glare, leaving him alone with her.
“Oh, now, what kind of a party pooper are you?” she taunted, reaching to the table beside her to lift her glass of punch with a pinky extended. “We were just having some quality girl time, is all.”
“What’s going on, Rose?” The Doctor approached her cautiously, wary of making any sudden moves in this situation that felt so dangerous. “Are the babies alright?”
“Oh,” Rose said, waving her hand dismissively when she sat down the glass of punch. “They’re fine. Snuggled in their mother’s womb like the little angels they are. I have to tell you though, Doctor, I’m quite anxious to meet our children.”
The Doctor felt dirty at the thought of this...this creature calling his daughters her own. “I get the feeling that they’re not your children,” he said, stopping a few feet away.
Rose laughed. “But of course they’re mine! Look at how fat I am!” She got to her feet and gestured to her large belly. “Surely you don’t just think this is all for nothing, do you? That I’m just ...rotund?” She laughed, and the false, hollow tones were a complete departure from the normal, pleasant, musical sound of Rose’s mirth. This sound felt like glass in the Doctor’s bones and he cringed.
His mind reeled. This wasn’t Rose, that much was clear. But who had possession of Rose’s body?
He flinched at the sound of a familiar voice from the next room, growing louder as it approached him from behind. “Doctor? What are you bloody doing here? Why are you making everyone leave? Oh, I knew you wouldn't leave well enough alone. You’re a bloody menace, you are! What’s going on?”
The Doctor felt the tension in his shoulders ratchet higher with the grating sound of Jackie’s voice behind him, and he turned to address her and block her from entering. Before he could speak, Jackie spoke to Rose.
“Rose? What’s going on sweetheart? Everything alright with the babies?”
“Oh, mother, everything is just lovely,” Rose simpered.
“‘Mother’? You never call me mother’...” Jackie started.
Rose gave a fraudulent, tinkling laugh. “Don’t I? Perhaps you just haven’t been paying attention. You let me run away with an alien, after all. Stellar parenting, that. I suppose I’ll just have to do better for these dear ones.” She patted her belly.
“Doctor?” Jackie asked, stung, her voice becoming more shrill with alarm. “What’s going on here?!”
“I don’t know, Jackie,” he ground out, “but I need you to leave and let me figure it out.”
“Not bloody likely!” she proclaimed. “S’my daughter! And my grandbabies!”
Rose laughed. “Always so proprietary, Mother! So demanding. I love the way you just order him about. Do it some more.”
“Jack!” the Doctor called over his shoulder, never taking his eyes off of Rose. When Jack appeared, the Doctor jerked his head towards Jackie. “Get her out of here.”
“Now you wait just a minute!”
“Now, Jack.”
Jackie flailed and smacked at Jack, then Pete came in behind him to help, speaking soothingly to his thrashing wife. Between the two, they dragged a squawking Jackie out of the room.
“Well that was just mean, Doctor,” Rose grinned at him, a slinking thing that didn’t touch her eyes. “Are you always so high-handed?” She started towards him, and the way she was trying to sway her hips seductively despite her waddle would have been laughable, except it really, really wasn’t. “It’s really quite a turn-on, you know.”
“Who are you?” he asked in a low voice.
“Why, I’m your wife, sillypants,” she purred, taking the last couple of steps and closing the space between them. “Don’t you recognize me?”
“You’re not Rose.”
Rose fluttered her lashes up at him. “Silly Time Lord, of course I am. Who else could I possibly be?” She put out a finger and traced the length of his tie.
“What have you done with Rose?”
Rose tugged the tie out of his jacket and gave it a pull, bringing him down to her mouth before he could stop her. The kiss lasted for 0.18 seconds before the Doctor pulled himself back with as much force as he dared, mindful not to push against Rose and potentially cause her to fall.
“Don’t touch me,” he ordered. “You’re not my wife, you’re just using her body.”
Rose rolled her eyes. “You’re a daft pain in the arse, you are.”
The Doctor’s hearts clenched with what he was about to do, but he didn’t see a choice. He pulled out his sonic and aimed at the body of his pregnant wife.
“Tell me who you are, and then get out of my wife’s body.”
Rose looked startled for just a moment, then laughed. “So much bravado,” she commented, turning away from him and walking back to the table that held her glass of punch. She walked over and picked up the glass, taking a swallow and then, to the Doctor’s intense horror, tossing a pair of small, white pills into her mouth alongside. The sonic drooped in his hand as fear washed over him.
“What did you just-”
Rose waved her hand as she swallowed. “Nothing harmful, I assure you. Let’s just call it ‘aspirin’.”
“Time Lords are allergic to aspirin!” he roared.
“Well how was I supposed to know that?” she challenged.
“You would have known that if you were Rose,” he snarled. “What have you done to my children? My wife?”
“Oh, pipe down,” she dismissed him. “It wasn’t actually aspirin. Just a little synthetic hormone. Well, more than a little, to be fair. Just enough to kickstart labor.”
“Labor!?” he cried, rushing forward to grab her by the shoulders then bellowing over his shoulder. “ Martha! I need you!”
Rose threw his hands off and took a couple of steps away from him, then clutched her belly with a short, ‘oh!’ The Doctor rushed towards her again, but she swatted his hands away and stood upright again.
“Why do you need Rose?”
Rose didn’t answer him. Instead, she said, “You should feel honored, Time Lord. I’ve been through at least a dozen bodies trying to get to you. Oh, but I’ve been patient. Gathering the information I needed, lying in wait, biding my time. Immortality is well worth a few months on this backwater cesspool of a planet, don't you think? This century is absolutely dreadful, you know. I should be commended for tolerating it, really.”
“Immortality?”
“Yes, catching on now, are we?” she taunted him. “Really, Doctor, I thought you were much more clever than that.”
“You’re trapped now,” he told her, his voice menacing. “There’s no escape for you. Just how did you think this was going to play out? That I wouldn’t notice that my wife was a completely different person? You’d just take what you need and then be on your way?”
A spasm of pain rocked Rose’s body, and she cried out, curling over her hands again. The Doctor stepped towards her, his arms extended to help automatically. He was struggling to hang on to coherent thought, the panic for Rose and the girls cluttering his thought processes and making his mind feel sluggish.
“You know, I don’t usually make mistakes,” she panted when she stood up straight again a minute later. There were beads of sweat on her reddened forehead and she brushed her hair back from her eyes with a pained expression. “But I’m thinking that I may have been better off to wait until after your brood mare had her litter. It would have made much more sense to come along then and take their blood.”
“What have you done? And what do you mean, ‘take their blood’?”
“I meant just what I said, 'take their blood'. Honestly. Do you think I really want a couple of brats? No, just a bit of their blood, with those gorgeous, Time Lord stem cells, will do, s’all I need.”
Another contraction hit, and Rose cried out, breathing heavily for a moment while the Doctor did his best to remain calm and come up with a solution. So far, he was coming up with nothing.
“You and I have met before, Doctor, although I looked quite different then.” She looked down at her body with disgust. “I was a lot thinner then, that’s for sure.”
Martha and Jack came rushing back into the room, stopping beside him. He held out a hand to keep them back. “Who are you? I demand that you get out of Rose this instant! Give her back to me!”
Rose curled over her belly again, her eyes widening with pain, and took a couple of deep breaths. Martha started towards her, but the Doctor held her back. When she straightened, she looked at him with defiant eyes. “Oh, just calm down. You’ll have your precious Rose back as soon as I get the cells I need.”
“Why do you need blood?” The Doctor felt panic crowding his mind even more. “Will mine work? If I give you my blood, will you get out of Rose?”
Rose looked thoughtful for a minute. “I think your blood may work, better, actually, come to think of it.” She looked satisfied with herself. “Yes, I think we could make a deal. Oh, I should have thought of this from the very beginning. All I would have had to do is hold the little chav hostage and gotten what I need. Oh well, I suppose I learned my lesson.”
The Doctor stripped off his jacket, tossing it to the side and started rolling up his shirtsleeve. “Martha, get what we need to draw a pint for...for…” he stumbled, realizing that he still didn’t know who he was dealing with.
“Who are you?” Jack asked.
Rose cried out in pain again and Martha pushed past the Doctor to rush to her.
“Answer him!” the Doctor demanded. “Tell me who you are or so help me, I’ll not give you a drop!”
“I’m…” she ground out, “I’m the...the last human.”
“Cassandra?” the Doctor asked, incredulous.
“You know,” she ground out, pushing Martha’s helping hands away, “I didn’t think to secure the body of the little waiter I’ve been inhabiting for use after this one is used up.”
“What do you mean used up?” the Doctor demanded in a harsh, frightened tone. “What will become of Rose?!?”
Cassandra waved a dismissive hand. “These bodies never last long when I take them over, but that’s what the serum is for, isn’t it? Means I can stay in a host forever. Still, I doubt I’ll have enough time to save this body once I have the blood...not that I would want to,” she said with distaste, looking back down at her body. “I’ve been nothing more than stretched skin once before - no, ta. I’d rather be someone young and....” She gave Martha a speculative look, then traced a finger down her cheek. Martha shuddered and took a large step back. “Beautiful. You’ll do nicely, won’t you, love? I’ll be sure to come and find you. Oh, don’t look so glum. You’ll get to live forever, now, won’t you?”
“So that’s it?” the Doctor demanded, his mind racing. “You just psychograft yourself into bodies and use them up until they die, then find a new host?”
“Yes, that’s exactly it, but I won’t have to do that anymore, you see? The serum made from the stem cells of a Time Lord will let me stay young and beautiful forever! My, but I thought Time Lords were supposed to be clever.”
“Oh, I’m clever,” he said in a low voice. “Clever enough to know that your plan has failed already. You’ll not be hurting anyone else, Cassandra. You’ll not be using up any more hosts. It ends here, now. Get out of my wife!”
Rose’s body bent double against a powerful contraction that wracked it, and Cassandra cried out. The Doctor ached to rush forward and alleviate the pain Rose must still be feeling, but first he had to figure out how to get rid of the consciousness inside of her as well without causing her further torment.
“I’m not leaving until I get my blood!” Cassandra shouted back at him when she seemed able to speak again. “Until then, I am staying in this…” she gestured down to her large abdomen, “body, and if it burns like the rest, so be it!”
Martha stumbled backwards from Cassandra and the Doctor bent automatically to catch her. She pointed up at Cassandra, and the Doctor followed her finger.
Rose/Cassandra had stood straight up. Her eyes glowed gold, her arms extended, and she held her head erect, staring at nothing. Tendrils of light swirled all around her and she opened her mouth to speak. He’d heard this voice from her lips before, in desperate, desperate circumstances. Fear enveloped him and he let out an involuntary little moan.
“I am the Bad Wolf,” she said, wisps of light escaping with her soft voice. “The protector of Time’s children.”
“Rose,” the Doctor implored, taking a step towards her, begging the deity before him. “Please…”
Bad Wolf looked down at him. “You are afraid, my Thief.”
“Please, please, keep my daughters safe, and my wife…”
“This assault on the daughters of Time shall not stand,” Bad Wolf said, and she glowed brighter. “The Lady Cassandra sought to make herself immortal, sacrificing others and attempting to take the daughters of Time. She is no more. The Vortex within my veins has delivered justice.” Bad Wolf’s light intensified again, burned brighter for a moment. The threads of light emanating from her like an aura of flame crackled with beautiful strength, dangerous, but somehow alluring.
“She is erased,” Bad Wolf declared.
The Doctor felt hot tears splash onto his cheeks. “Please...the girls…”
The glow surrounding Bad Wolf receded, leaving only her eyes illuminated. She turned and looked at him. “You fear for the daughters of Time and Rose. There is no need. I made them possible, and I am their protector. The danger is passed. The threat has been vanquished. You now have forever with your bondmate, my Thief. My Rose is yours.”
The Doctor felt his hearts pounding in his chest. “You mean -”
“I mean that you will keep the gifts that you have been given. Your family is safe, my Thief. I will always keep my Thief, his Rose, and Time’s children safe…always safe…”
The Doctor felt himself sway in his spot, relief loosening his resolve to stand. “Thank you,” he whispered. “Thank you.”
“Cherish your family, Time Lord. I will always be with you…”
She tilted her head back and held her arms out from her body, and golden light poured from her mouth and fingertips. When it stopped, she swayed on her feet and the Doctor rushed forward, catching her before she could fall.
As the Doctor eased Rose down in his arms, onto the ground, he heard Jack call to Martha for help over his shoulder
Rose’s head rolled on the Doctor’s arm, and he just stared at her, not sure what to say or do. He barely noticed that Martha was there, on Rose’s other side, checking vital signs.
Rose’s eyes fluttered open and she looked up at the Doctor, giving a weak smile. “Doctor…” she murmured, her voice thin.
“It’s alright, Rose. You’re safe now. She’s gone. Everything is alright.”
“I was Bad Wolf again, wasn’t I?”
He nodded. “You were. And you were brilliant, my Rose, my precious girl.”
“I’m sorry, Doctor…” she whispered.
“No, no, my sweet alalia, don’t apologize.”
“I’m so sorry, Doctor…” she persisted, even as the Doctor shushed her, watching one of his own tears splash her face beside a silver track cut by her own.
“There’s nothing to be sorry for, precious girl. Hush now, Martha is going to check you and the babies.”
“I couldn’t save you any cake, but there are cookies,” she murmured, just before she succumbed to sleep.
~*~O~*~
Rose awakened a short while later and looked around, trying to get her bearings. She was on the TARDIS, in the medbay, and she seemed to be alone. She raised her hand to examine the IV that was there, narrowing her eyes at it. Why’s that there, then?
“Doctor?” she said, her voice foggy with sleep.
There was a clang of metal on metal. “Rose!” He rushed towards her and bent over the bed, showering her with kisses. “You’re alright. Oh, Rose, you’re alright!”
“Course m’alright, Doctor. What’s going on? Are the girls alright?”
“Yes, yes, you’re all fine, all of you are safe. You’re fine. You’re here, with me,” he seemed to whisper to himself. He pressed his lips to her cheeks a couple more times, fervently, then dropped a soft kiss to the end of her nose. It made her smile.
“So what happened, then?” her memory was foggy, but she tried to make sense of the last couple of hours.
“You were...you were possessed.”
“I was what?!”
He settled himself into the chair beside her bed. “Do you remember Cassandra? From Platform One?”
“The bitchy trampoline?”
The Doctor smiled. “That’s the one.”
“What about her?”
“She psychografted herself onto you; basically, she put her consciousness inside of you and used your body as her own. She did it to multiple other people, too; as best I can tell, everyone we’ve been encountering who has acted oddly since we got here has been her, trying to get at you and the girls.”
Rose was stunned. “Why would she do that?”
The Doctor stroked her hair away from her face before he answered, and she leaned her cheek into the palm of his hand. “She wanted the babies,” he said. “Specifically, she wanted some of the babies’ blood. Stem cells.”
“Why?” she asked with wide eyes.
“Because with it, she’d be able to create a serum that allowed her to claim a body and keep it indefinitely. Eternally. She’d never die, and she’d stop killing off host bodies as she infected them.”
“And she wanted our babies for that?”
The Doctor nodded. “But you stopped her, Rose. She’s gone now.”
“How did I stop her?”
“Don’t you remember?” Rose shook her head. “You were Bad Wolf again,” he said, awe in his voice. “Bad Wolf said she gave us these babies, and she’s going to keep them safe.”
“Bad Wolf,” Rose sighed, laying her head back onto the pillows and closing her eyes for a moment. Bad Wolf had come to her rescue again. “What did Bad Wolf do?”
“I don’t know exactly, but Cassandra’s gone.”
“I killed her?”
“You protected yourself, these babies, and who knows how many other people, Rose.”
Rose didn’t answer for a moment, letting the the Doctor’s words settle in over her. She wiped her eyes after a while. ““So you were right all along. We’re having the girls because Bad Wolf wanted us to.”
“Yes,” he agreed, threading his fingers through hers. “But there’s more, Rose…”
She didn’t like the tone he had, there was something like warning in it. Dread.
“What is it, Doctor?” He hedged and she snapped at him: “Just tell me!”
“The Bad Wolf tied your timeline to mine,” he said on a rush. Then lowered his head, laying his forehead on her thigh. “I’m sorry, Rose. I didn’t know...I suspected, but I didn’t know for sure...we were going to do more testing…”
Realization was dawning, but she wanted to be sure. “Suspected what?”
The Doctor took a deep breath, then looked up at her with pleading eyes. “Your timeline is tied to mine, Rose. It means that...it means that while I’m alive, you will be, too. I’m so sorry…” he held her hand in both of his and bent to kiss it. “I’m so sorry, Rose...but you’re going to outlive your whole family…”
Rose watched his head roll, anguished, on her thigh and put her hand into his hair absently. There was something fighting its way into her thoughts, some memory from months ago that was almost there...she could almost touch it...and she concentrated on plucking it from the recesses of her mind.
I owe you a great debt, Rose Tyler. You saved my thief. You healed him. Made him whole again.
“All I want is him. Healthy. Happy. Not alone. Only him. Forever.”
Yes, the Vortex sang. I see that.
“Please take me to him,” Rose repeated.
I see your desires and share them. My thief desires you. He needs you. I have the power to give you both what you want. You can become the Bad Wolf, and I can set the timeline in motion. Or I can take you home, and the current timeline can continue.
“Please, not home. Don’t take me home.”
Very well, but if you do this, you must understand the life you are choosing, the timeline you’re setting yourself upon. It is all your choice…
The Vortex spun before her, and she saw timelines spreading, criss-crossing each other and spider webbing out into eternity. Everything seemed so intricate and delicate, as if an exhaled breath from her could sever any number of the frail, silver threads she saw. Is this what the Doctor saw all the time? How he felt? As if one tiny little movement could destroy everything?
She narrowed her eyes and searched, not knowing or caring if she should. There. There was her timeline, and it seemed to be moving in more directions than any of the others. Distantly, like an echo, she could hear the Doctor’s voice. ‘You could spend your life here; work, telly, beans on toast...or you could come with me.’
The glittering rose gold of her timeline crossed with a brilliant blue that she knew instinctively was his, and they spun around each other once.
‘Blimey, you’re beautiful,’ the Doctor said, then she heard her own voice; ‘Better with two.’
Again, the two lines twisted around each other.
Rose saw an image of the Doctor cupping her face then pulling her into a hug in 1987, and the two of them curled around each other on the couch. Their timelines mimicked their posture.
The Doctor and Rose danced around the console, and the helix of their timelines grew tighter.
She saw herself with the Doctor in the Shogun’s gardens in Kyoto. The Doctor gave her the bowl and told her he loved her. Rose felt the slide of his lips against hers.
Now, Rose Tyler, you have a choice to make, the Vortex sang to her, removing the timelines from her sight. Do you bind your timelines further by going back to my Thief? Or do you unwind them and return to your uncomplicated, human life?
“Take me to him. Please.”
If you go back, you will be with him, Rose Tyler, always. His eternity will be yours, and you will share it with the lives you create.
“The lives we create?”
The Vortex showed her herself and the Doctor, each cradling a little bundle, and the sound of children’s laughter echoed faintly.
‘Mummy,’ the little voices said. ‘Daddy.’
“That’s my future?” Rose asked, awestruck.
If you go back for him and bind your timeline to his, that’s your destiny. The choice is yours.
“I chose this,” she stated in a quiet voice, the memory of her choice crystallizing.
“You what?” His head jerked upwards beneath her hand so that he could look at her. She smiled down at him.
“I chose this,” she repeated. “I remember now. When I opened the heart of the TARDIS, when I first became Bad Wolf, she offered me a choice. She showed me my destiny if I stayed back on Earth in my timeline where you’d sent me, or if I came back for you. She showed me this, all of this,” she indicated her belly. “She left the choice up to me, and I chose this. Us. I chose to be with you, forever.”
The Doctor looked stunned. “You...you chose to tie yourself to me for hundreds and hundreds of years?”
Rose nodded at him, a smile growing and taking over her entire face before she bit her lip to hold it in check. “Told you you were stuck with me.”
“But...but your mum and all your friends…”
“Yeah? What about them?”
“They’ll all die eventually, but you won’t.”
“Well, I guess that means we’ll just have to visit Earth a bit more than we had planned, so I can see them as much as I can before that time comes, so I won’t have any regrets.” She ran her fingers through his hair. “That is, if you can stand it.”
“Oh, Rose...oh Rose!” He shot to his feet and pressed his lips to hers fervidly, kissing her hard. “We’ll stay here as much as you like; we’ll live in the stars as much as you want...we’ll...we’ll live here during the week and take to the stars on the weekends...whatever you want! It’s yours, my Rose, my alalia, you just name it!”
Rose beamed at him, the knowledge that a few decades with him had now been extended indefinitely making her heart sing.
~*~O~*~
A short while later, the Doctor had crawled into the large bed in the medbay to rub Rose’s back until she fell asleep. Once she’d drifted off, he put his hand on her belly and started communicating with Smidgen and Moppet.
He knew that they had been aware and afraid when Cassandra had taken over their mother’s body, and he did his best to soothe them now, letting them know that he and Rose were there, and that they were safe in the care of their parents, and that Mummy and Daddy would always be there to protect them.
‘Always’ carried a bit more weight now, he thought with a giddy smile.
“Rose?” Martha said from the door, and the Doctor shushed her, even as he waved her in. Martha smiled, and the Doctor set about waking his sleeping wife while the young doctor came in and sat beside the bed.
“Did I fall asleep?” Rose asked in a drowsy little voice.
The Doctor kissed her shoulder. “You did, but that’s alright. You need your sleep. You can get back to it in just a few minutes. Martha needs to speak with us right now.”
Rose rolled towards her back, and the Doctor slid out from behind her and onto his feet, accommodating her, helping her to get comfortable and propped against pillows. Once she was settled, he took her hand in both of his and sat gingerly on the side of the bed.
“Hello, Martha,” Rose said with a smile. “I hear it was an interesting baby shower.”
“That it was,” Martha smiled in return.
“Did the Doctor explain to you what happened?”
She nodded. “And what he didn’t, Jack filled in. A goddess of time and space, huh?”
“Yeah, well, go big or go home,” Rose laughed. “Probably should have warned you that life around us would never be calm and quiet.”
Martha waved a dismissive hand. “Don’t worry about it. How often does a girl get to say that she’s friends with an actual deity? Besides, it was an adventure. How are the girls?”
“Still in there,” Rose rubbed her free hand over her large belly. “For now. Did Cassandra have any effect on them?”
“Well, yes, and that’s what I’m here to tell you about.”
“Are they alright?” Rose sounded alarm, and the Doctor sent her a wave of peace through their bond.
Martha nodded. “They’re fine, they’re fine. It’s all good news. Well, mostly good news.”
The Doctor raised an eyebrow. “Mostly?”
“While you were asleep, I ran some tests. And it seems that the labor-inducing medication that Cassandra gave you did its trick: it kickstarted labor. I was able to stop it, but not before you effaced to 80% and dilated to three centimeters.”
“Isn’t it still too early?” Rose asked, alarmed.
“The babies seem to be fine,” Martha assured her. “They would be completely viable if they were born now. However, every day in the womb for a fetus is a good day, so we want to keep you pregnant as long as possible. To that end…”
“Bed rest,” Rose finished for her in a dull voice.
“Yes. Bed rest. Complete bed rest. You can go to the loo and have a shower, but either I or the Doctor need to be with you when you do.”
Rose nodded, accepting.
“But there is good news. I think that, at best, you’ve got another three to four weeks to go. So it’s not forever. And there’s the small matter of the hernia…”
“Won’t that complicate things?” the Doctor wanted to know.
“It would, if it were still there.”
“It’s gone?” Rose was incredulous.
“It’s gone,” Martha smiled. “You are in peak physical condition to give birth to healthy baby girls. All there is to do now is wait.”
Rose smiled; a smile immediately kissed by the Doctor before he turned back to Martha.
“So we’re going to have healthy babies in a couple of weeks? No complications?”
Martha nodded at him, still smiling. “None that I can foresee. It should be as easy as any birth ever is. The babies are in position and just waiting for their cue to exit. It’s just best, in most cases, to let the babies decide when that time is on their own.”
The Doctor jumped to his feet and hugged Martha, then spun back around to kiss Rose. “We’re going to have these little girls in our arms in just a couple of weeks,” he said happily.
“I know,” Rose beamed. “I’m ready.”
Chapter 40: From Here We Look Out On Forever
Summary:
The girls make their appearance.
Notes:
Here we are, folks! The end of this tale.
The very first thing I need to do is thank each and every one of you who have been reading this fic. I never expected this little story to get much attention, but you guys have made this the most-commented fic under both the Nine/Rose and the Ten/Rose tag. I'm honored beyond words. Thank you so, so much. Your comments and encouragements and flailing and ranting have been what's gotten me through this story...you made this possible!
Credit for the babies' first names go to hanluvr and ten-and-a-rose...thank you ladies so much!
If you guys will indulge me, I want to take a minute to recognize Tenroseforeverandever. TRFE has beta'd every word of this fic, talked me out of bad ideas, talked me into good ideas, and there have been times (like this chapter) where she's held my hand to the point that she's practically co-written. She and I didn't know each other very well when we started on this fic together almost six months ago, but we've become good friends now and I'm so, so thankful for that. TRFE - I owe you huge. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart.
Now...without any further ado...the conclusion of Kintsugi!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
*~*~*March 5, 2008*~*~*
“Ugh. I’m sick of being stuck in this bed.”
“I’m with you, though,” the Doctor volunteered.
Rose rolled her eyes. “Yes, but you can get out of bed. I’m stuck here.”
“Not for much longer, love,” the Doctor said, kissing the hand he held. “It’s almost time. Martha said any day now. And besides,” he smiled, “you’re getting to watch my favorite show.”
Rose sighed and shifted her weight a little in the bed. “I know. I’m just bored.”
“How can you be bored with the West Wing! It’s the greatest show of all time!” Rose made a little noise and the Doctor poked her arm gently with his finger. “Go on, admit it. You love it, too.”
She favored him with a small laugh. “Alright, I won’t deny it. I do love -”
“Ha!”
“...Josh,” she finished with a tongue-touched grin.
“Josh!?”
“Oh, yes. Josh ‘Lemon’ Lyman.”
The Doctor looked utterly affronted. “You love Josh?”
“He’s adorable. I just love him to bits.” She leaned over and kissed the tip of his nose. “But not like you.”
The Doctor harrumphed, slightly mollified. “I would have pegged you as a Sam kind of girl.”
“Sam’s pretty.” The Doctor looked wounded, and Rose patted his hand. “But not as pretty as my Doctor.”
“Quite right, too.”
Rose giggled and reached for the glass of water on her bedside table. “I’m still convinced you only wanted me to watch this show for that one joke about Toby’s wife being a minivan because she was pregnant with twins.”
The Doctor looked mischievous. “Well I admit - ”
She froze.
“Rose? What is it?”
She looked down at what she could see of her lap and her eyes widened. “Doctor, I think my water just broke.”
~*~O~*~*
The Doctor had lived nearly a millennium and traveled all over time and space. He’d seen civilizations rise and fall; he’d seen wars and peace; he’d seen the dead walk; he’d watched his own planet burn. He’d met gods of every make and model and believed in the miracles of none. There were wonders in the universe throughout time, and he’d seen plenty of them. But there were no miracles. For everything, the Doctor believed, there was a logical explanation.
Then he met Rose Tyler.
She’d done it. Rose had actually done it. Not that the Doctor had ever really doubted her, but still... She’d actually given birth to their twin daughters.
He looked down at the small bundle of miracle in his arms and into the soft, pink face of his younger daughter. Ella. Her older sister, Ginny, lay in a cot beside Rose’s bed on the TARDIS. All three of the women in his life were sleeping soundly and they were beautiful. All just so... so achingly beautiful.
The baby in his arms was tiny; much smaller than he had expected. Her lips pursed into a little moue in her sleep, and she suckled a little. Her peachy-pink skin was so soft he couldn’t resist nuzzling her tiny cheek. The baby made a sound and squirmed, knocking her little cap off. He brought up his free hand to let his fingers trace the unbelievable downy softness of her dark, almost black, hair.
“Daddy’s little Smidgen. My precious little Ella,” he breathed. Ella fluttered her dark blue eyes open for a moment, then let out a little breath and slept on.
The Doctor felt the TARDIS’ joy in the back of his mind. He and Rose had talked about the best place to have the babies, but both knew that the only place they could ever possibly complete their family would be on the the TARDIS. The Old Girl had been pleased with this. To accommodate them and their needs, she had brought all of the medical equipment they might need into their bedroom on the TARDIS, so that Rose could give birth at home. Rose had taken advantage of it, laboring for a while in the large tub in the ensuite before getting back into the bed so the girls could make their arrival.
The TARDIS was happy, and her contentment washed over the Doctor, mixing with his own.
“Ella,” he said quietly, “I think it’s time for you to meet someone very, very important. Someone who’s been very much looking forward to meeting you.” He walked over to the wall and tugged at her blanket a little bit, freeing a tiny little hand. Ella’s fingers closed around his instinctively, and he felt the clench in his hearts. He left her fingers curled around his for a moment, then took a step closer to the coral strut and lay her little hand against it. The Doctor felt a surge of love as soon as the contact was made. He let go of Ella’s hand and put his own against the strut to communicate with his ship. “You’ve got your work cut out for you, girl. Lots of baby-proofing to do.”
The TARDIS laughed in the back of his mind, a joyful sound, and he smiled up at the ceiling.
Ginny was stirring in her cot and the Doctor walked over to her. She was swaddled in a pink blanket, just like Ella’s, that was decorated with little flowers. Her sleep seemed to be over, though, and she was beginning to fret. “Hey, my little Moppet,” he said, bouncing the baby in his arms and reaching down to her, offering his finger. “Hey, now, Ginny, don’t fret. Daddy’s here.”
Rose heard the babies and began to wake. “They alright?” she muttered, sleepy.
“They’re fine,” the Doctor said, still bouncing Smidgen and smiling as Moppet squeezed his finger tightly, even as she began to stir more. “Getting restless.”
She yawned then sat up in the bed, moving slowly, tentatively, as if it hurt.
“Don’t,” he told her, unable to actually stop her, both hands occupied.
“S’alright,” she said. “Let me feed them.”
“Really, Rose,” he said, trying to put her off. “You need to rest.”
“Give me one of my daughters, Doctor. Quit hogging them.”
He sighed, then gently - so gently - deposited Ella into her mother’s waiting arms before he scooped up Ginny and took her over to the coral strut, just as he had Ella.
“Are you introducing them to the TARDIS?”
“Yes, best for them to know their home, don’t you think?” he offered.
Rose situated Ella on her breast and smiled over at the Doctor. “Don’t you just look like a natural,” she remarked with a smile in her voice.
“Do I?” he asked, turning back towards her, genuinely pleased.
“You do,” Rose smiled, leaning back into the cushions of their bed. “Fatherhood looks good on you.”
The Doctor beamed, then walked to the other side of the bed and clambered in beside Rose, gently, Ginny still bundled in his arms. The two of them gazed down at their children, these swaddled little miracles in their arms.
Ella finished eating and drifted off to sleep. Rose raised her to one shoulder and patted, looking for a burp.
“Knock, knock,” came a voice at the door. The Doctor looked up to see Jack poking his head around the door. “Martha said we could come down. You’ve got visitors. Is it safe to come in?”
“Yes,” Rose smiled. “The girls are sleeping.”
Jack turned around and indicated that they needed quiet with his finger on his lips, then opened the door and came in, followed by Pete and Jackie. As soon as Jackie came around the corner and spotted Rose, she waddled across the room to her daughter. “Oh, my sweet Rose,” Jackie cried, tears already wetting her cheeks. She arrived beside the bed and leaned over to hug Rose awkwardly, then kissed her forehead.
“You did it, sweetheart,” Jackie said proudly, through tears.
“So proud of you, Rose,” Pete chuffed.
Rose smiled up at her mother, then adjusted Ella to hand her to her grandmother. “Mum, I’d like to introduce you to your granddaughter, Arella Grace Tyler, also known as ‘Ella’.”
Jackie snuggled the baby close, looking down into Ella’s sleeping face with something akin to rapture. “Hello, sweetheart. I’m your Nan.”
The Doctor looked up at Jack, who was taking in the scene. He hesitated for a moment, then made a decision. “And, Captain Harkness, this is your niece. Ginny.” Jack reached his arms out to take Ginny, and the Doctor pretended to hold her back for a moment. “I trust that I don’t have to remind you that I’m a very powerful man and will think nothing of exercising that power if you corrupt my daughters, Jack,” he warned.
Jack laughed and held his arms out. “I’m sure I’ll corrupt them at some point, but not today. Let me see my niece.”
The Doctor handed Ginny to Jack with a smile, then settled back against the headboard with his arm around Rose.
“Is Ginny short for something?” Pete asked, peering at the baby in Jack’s arms.
“Not short, no,” the Doctor said. “Her given name is Gin Alina Tyler, but we’ll call her Ginny.”
“Gin!” Jackie squawked. “You named my grandbaby after alcohol?!”
Rose laughed. “No, Mum. ‘Gin’ means ‘silver’ in Japanese.”
“And ‘Arella’ means ‘gold’ in Latin,” the Doctor volunteered.
“Why silver and gold?” Pete asked.
Rose settled against the Doctor’s shoulder. “It’s in honor of kintsugi.”
“Kintsugi?” Jackie and Pete looked nonplussed, but Jack just gave a little smile.
“It’s an ancient Japanese art. The Japanese take broken pottery and mend it using gold or silver lacquer. We felt it was appropriate.”
Appropriate indeed. So very appropriate. The Doctor looked at Rose and his beautiful babies and his love for them swelled his hearts until he thought they would burst. Letting his memory wander back two years, he was in awe of how one little London shopgirl had managed to take the hand of a broken, self-destructive man, and give him hope for a new life; had begun to heal him with just a touch of a compassionate hand and a tongue-tipped smile.
He remembered taking her hand in the Shogun’s gardens, and giving her the little kintsugi bowl. He had told her how she’d healed him, and he’d meant it - Rose had, with her golden personality, mended him expertly. She’d filled in the cracks and made him whole again. It was the most apt example he could have given. He recalled, with a hug around Rose’s shoulders, his regeneration and accidental betrayal of her trust. He’d broken her heart and left both of them bereft, but together the two of them had made each other whole again. She’d allowed him to heal her, to shore her up, to help her find her love for him again.
He’d thought, in the months after his regeneration as they waited for these babies, that he’d known what completion felt like. He’d thought he’d known, in the nights he lay beside Rose in their bed as she slept, his hand resting over the babies, bathing them with his love, that he’d known exactly what it meant to feel whole.
Now, as the Doctor looked around the room at Pete and Jackie cooing over Ella, and Jack making little faces at Ginny with suspiciously wet eyes, he realized that he may have known what it meant to feel mended, but something had still been missing. In the three hours since their birth, his daughters - Gin and Arella, silver and gold - the gifts that his alalia had given him, had filled the cup that Rose had mended. The Doctor was full.
Now, he was healed. He was complete. They were complete.
“Ginny and Ella,” Jack mused, smiling down at the sandy-haired little girl in his arms. “Perfect names for perfect girls.”
He felt Rose touch their bond, sending him a wave of joy and her boundless love. Pressing a kiss to her hair, he took her hand in his, and with a gentle squeeze sent his own love and gratitude back.
The Doctor had spent most of his 900 years chasing experiences. He’d sought adventure in every way he could think of, on every planet he’d visited. He’d learned languages and cultures, met untold numbers of people, influenced countless events across time and space. He’d toppled regimes, halted wars, explored uncharted lands, been worshiped as a god and reviled as a demon. He’d had friends, enemies, and the rare lover.
But in all of his roaming, he'd never found the peace he craved - until now. He had found, in Rose, the experience he’d been chasing for all his lifetimes: in the slide of her hand in his, and the smile that she gave him when the two of them were alone.
And as Jack handed a fussing Ginny to back to Rose, he realized that that old life had ended, and he had an entire future full of love and hope to look forward to.
“From here we look out on forever,” he told Rose in a quiet voice.
She looked up at him and smiled. “Together.”
Notes:
I'm not sure about the pronunciation of "Gin", but for the sake of the fic and the name "Ginny", we're going to give it a soft 'g' sound. :)
A couple of lines from this are cribbed from 37 chapters ago in this very fic. :)
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TenRoseForeverandever on Chapter 1 Tue 15 Dec 2015 07:18PM UTC
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