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Eye of Newt and a Ten Dollar Mop by lovelyirony
Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Iron Man (Movies)
01 Oct 2020
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Summary
In which Tony finds out he's magic, finds out that mops are not proper substitutes for broomsticks, and Rhodey is remarkably nonplussed by magic.
(Also: Rhodey told everyone that Tony moved to Italy for a highly extensive D&D campaign. Asshole.)
Bookmarked by FaylenLupus
08 May 2026
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https://archiveofourown.org/works/26760157
Eye of Newt and a Ten Dollar Mop by lovelyirony—
-Tony can’t fucking fly on a fucking mop.
-One broken arm later and a phone call to his mother later, Maria Carbonell is sitting on her son’s dormitory mattress and wondering just why the hell he lied to her about how he broke his arm.
Here was her son’s lie:
“Um. I broke my arm because dinner sucked.”
A.) There was no follow up.
B.) Her son is as bad at lying as she is.
Unfortunately, she did not announce her arrival, and so she gets Tony’s roommate opening the door and screaming that the liquor is in the second cabinet from the left.
Maria raises one eyebrow.
“Did Tony at least pick out good wine?”
“Uh...you’re Tony’s mom?”
“Yes.”
“I didn’t think you were coming to visit until move-out.”
“I...we had an interesting conversation. You wouldn’t happen to know why Tony actually broke his arm, would you?”
“Um...no.”
(Rhodey is also a bad liar.)
-
Tony gets home about ten minutes later and promptly says:
“Oh fuck.”
“Is that any way to greet your mother?” Mom asks, already sipping delicately on her glass of water.
“Um...move-out isn’t for another month.”
“I know. But you lied to your dear mother.”
“How did you know?”
“You can never hide anything from your mom, and your excuse needed work, honey,” Maria answers. “So. How did you break your arm?”
Tony sighs.
“Promise me you won’t laugh. And don’t tell Jarvis.”
“What did you....what?”
-
The mop.
Maria doesn’t laugh at first, at least until she sees the pictures that Rhodey took and chuckles.
“You promised me you wouldn’t laugh!”
“What were you doing? And why?” she asks, laughing. Tony rubs the back of his neck nervously.
“Um, well...funny story...”
-
Maria should have known that her son would have her...abilities. But she had hoped that if he had never known the family, had never known what she could do, that maybe...maybe they wouldn’t come.
“So what you’re telling me,” Tony says, nostrils flaring, “is that there’s magic?”
“Yes,” Maria says. “And what we deal with specifically is good magic.”
“Oh, so I could’ve put Glinda the Good Witch on my family tree project,” Tony says sarcastically.
Maria scowls.
“Don’t sass me, Tony. I did it for your own good.”
“I set a car on fire!”
“Well, what kind of car was it?!”
“A Mustang!”
“Then that makes sense!” Maria says. “Your father drove one, and we all know how that turned out!”
Tony blinks for a moment.
And then laughs.
Maria starts laughing too, until they’re both giggling in the apartment, and Tony tells her about the grocery store incident.
——
“I was already wreaking havoc when I was eight,” Tony whines. “But, this also raises the question of when are we doing a family reunion?”She stops, looking at him.
“They weren’t exactly pleased when I married a millionaire.”
“Not even when he became a billionaire and you got half his fortune?” Tony teases.
“Not even then,” she answers. “I have a...complicated relationship with magic.”
“As in, you don’t use it.”
“Correct,” she answers. “You don’t need magic in your life, and quite often, it gets you in more trouble than you anticipate.”
“Are you going to give me a ‘magic has consequences’ speech?”
Maria laughs.
“No. Magic, as far as I know, doesn’t really have consequences. The actions you do have consequences. You could blast up an entire country and as long as you don’t get caught, no consequences other than what you do to yourself.”
“Like having guilt?”
“Like having guilt. But enough about that, it’ll make you feel weird for a week if you keep thinking about it. I want you to light candles from two feet away.”
“Of course I can do that,” Tony scoffs.
“Sure you can.”
-
Tony also sets the curtains on fire!
-
Maria realizes that her son is perhaps just a tad (okay, a lot) more powerful than she was (and is).
So, she regrettably calls her mother.
——
Tony groans.“Sure, Nonna. I will come.”
“BRING FRIENDS. HAVE GIFTS FROM POPE FOR YOU.”
“You...when did you have time to get gifts...the pope?”
“HAVE FRIENDS. COME!”
— -
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Summary
It took a while but Sam had come up with a plan that may work getting a request to the billionaire. They just had to talk to the only one who knew where Stark was always being taken to when not at the Compound.
Continuation of 'Where is Tony?'
Series
- Part 2 of The Sorcerer and Scientist
- Part 9 of Post CA:CW AU Tony-centric oneshots
- Language:
- English
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- 4,613
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 1
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- 39
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- 2,186
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Bookmarked by FaylenLupus
06 May 2026
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https://archiveofourown.org/works/15792804
Confronting Stephen by Silver_KnightShade -
Please Know You Can Come Home by martianwahtney
Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
26 Sep 2021
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Summary
childhood friends James Rhodes and Tony Stark have never met in person. Instead, they use what Tony calls the Shine to communicate with each other.
As they grew up, their Shine diminished and they lost touch with each other, and in time assumed the other was nothing more than a figment of their imagination.
After countless fuck ups and tragedies, Tony ends up as a hospice worker in a small town. He uses his Shine to ease people into death and soothe their worries, earning him the peculiar title of Doctor Sleep.
It takes just one more tragedy for him to be reunited with his childhood friend, James Rhodes.
Series
- Part 2 of Tony Stark Bingo V
- Part 2 of ironhusbands bingo 2021
- Language:
- English
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- 8,173
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 3
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- 14
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- 116
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- 22
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- 1,227
Bookmarked by FaylenLupus
04 May 2026
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https://archiveofourown.org/works/34092571
Please Know You Can Come Home by martianwahtney -
My Prince by EchoSiriusRumme for Fluffypanda
Fandoms: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
06 Jan 2017
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Summary
Kneeling beside Jarvis, Tony looked up to meet his warm gaze. All at once the last of his façade shattered away, voice cracking as he asked, “But what if it doesn’t? What if James ends up hating me?”
In which there's an arranged marriage, Tony is super insecure, Bucky is misunderstood, and Howard is - unsurprisingly - a massive dick. Oh, plus magic spells and banishments.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,054
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- 1/1
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- 1
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- 21
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- 587
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- 58
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- 10,750
Bookmarked by FaylenLupus
28 Apr 2026
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https://archiveofourown.org/works/9223478
My Prince by EchoSiriusRumme -
belief by LadyCrimsonAndBlack
Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
06 Nov 2020
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Summary
"Do you know how gods get power?"
"By people believing in them."
― Terry Pratchett, Small Gods
Gods are not born. They are made.
Bookmarked by FaylenLupus
17 Apr 2026
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https://archiveofourown.org/works/27410275
belief by LadyCrimsonAndBlack-
Fury aims a furious – hah! – glare in his direction. “It is, if you’ve somehow become a goddamn metahuman, Stark. It’s kind of in our job description.”“Don’t worry,” Tony says with complete sincerity. “I’m not suddenly a metahuman, Fury. That’d be ridiculous.”
Tony’s beginning to suspect that he’s no human at all.
--
There is something familiar about Thor and Loki, a crackle of energy that is both similar and different to one Tony’s become used to since Afghanistan. Thor is a harsh wildness of a lighting storm in motion, dangerous and untamed, as opposed to Loki’s ice, so cold it burns. Both of them share nothing with the comforting bite of metal and smell of motor oil that Tony’s started to associate with himself, but the energy of it, the feeling, is irritatingly similar.Loki looks at Tony with amusement alight in his green eyes, while Thor greets him with a nod and a booming, “Brother!” that makes Romanov and Rogers regard him with suspicion for the rest of the flight.
Rogers is similar too, in a completely different way. There’s an energy to him too, but it’s an old thing, stale and musty, as if it’s stood neglected for years and years, forgotten and undisturbed. It makes hair on the nape of Tony’s neck stand on its end.
Tony stays away from him.
--
“You’re almost there, Man of Iron,” Loki grins at the top of the tower, widely, madly. “I wonder what you’re going to be, when the forging is over.” He pushes Tony out of a broken window. “Do try to be interesting.”
--
Tony puts a nuke through the portal.Tony puts a nuke through the portal, and the whole world watches, holding its breath. There are millions of people crying, begging, praying, and Tony hears them all.
Tony goes through that portal and sees the vastness of space, the darkness of the void and the brightness of the galaxy. It is too much for a human brain, searing and burning and trying to cram itself into his head, unreal and impossible and beautiful.
Tony falls.
When he opens his eyes, they are as bright as nebulae, stars being born and dying in brilliant spikes of light.
He is made anew.
--
That's the beginning.
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