CalicoKitty402
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The No Good Week And a Half by CalicoKitty402, TheFearsomeJabberwock, yelloskello
Fandoms: Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, Elder Scrolls
18 Jan 2026
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Summary
“You’re too late you furry half breed cunts!” Frisli shouted, gesturing rudely at Farkas and Alinor as they seethed on the dock. Alinor paced left and right, eyes narrowed into thin slits. “I’ll remember you when I break his mind and drain him dry!” she cackled, wrapping an arm around Xantos’ neck as she leaned back against his shoulder. “You’ll remember this as th’day you shouldn’t have fucked with the clan Volkihar y’ Dawnguard pissants!”
Alinor eyed the water for a moment, taking a breath before shucking off his cloak and boots and preparing to dive.
Frisli was standing on the boat, her eyes wide and afraid. She looked left, and right, and brought her hands up– swirling them into a circle. The mist started to thicken around them as Alinor struggled against Farkas, shrouding everything into a thick fog.
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Everyone has a very bad week and a half.Series
- Part 20 of You're Gonna Go Far, Kid
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 29,880
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Hits:
- 20
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Alinor's Guided Drunken Tour to Skyrim by CalicoKitty402, TheFearsomeJabberwock, yelloskello
Fandoms: Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, Elder Scrolls
29 Dec 2025
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Summary
Murray was having a weird week.
That was a given, really. He’d practically volunteered for it. During the festivities, he’d seen a deceptively sober looking Alinor wandering off somewhere nonsensical, and his damnable need to make sure his people remained in one piece led him to follow. He knew what a Sanguining looked like. He’d been Sanguined plenty of times; really, could call him something of a chum, now. Or… As chummy as a daedric prince was willing to be with him, at least.
This would be fine. He’d just… Round up the lad, gently usher him back into the Ragged Flagon with promises of treats and shenanigans, and then put roughly four to six guildmates on his ass to make sure he didn’t wander off again.He hadn’t accounted for Alinor ignoring the gentle ushering.
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Alinor takes a drunken tour of Skyrim, on one Sam Guevenne's suggestion.Series
- Part 19 of You're Gonna Go Far, Kid
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Pants Origami by CalicoKitty402, TheFearsomeJabberwock, yelloskello
Fandoms: Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, Elder Scrolls
30 Nov 2025
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Summary
“Aye, what makes pants origami any different from jus’ foldin’ y’trousers?” Xantos asked, tilting his head as Gnives sensually undid each lace.
“Well, this seems to be done with some sort of… Seductory intent,” Alinor would almost seem sober if Xantos didn’t know the high elf as well as he did. The lad was soused, veritably pickled even if he was holding his own.
“Is not a matter of seduction,” Gnives said seductively, trying to take a step across the table and stumbling over the pants now around his ankles. He dipped down to collect them in one hand, giving a pantleg a quick, swaggalicious swing in a circle. “Nor is it folding trousers.” He pretended to spit on the table. “Blasphemy. Pants origami is art, old elf. A ritual practice. Does one create sculpture to honor the gods when one folds trousers?”
“I ain’t got none on.” Xantos whispered to him, other hand reaching down to gesticulate with the fabric of his kilt.
“...Sangiin will make an exception,” Gnives offered, his eyes flicking up to the dunmer’s face as he gave him a toothy grin.
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Osprey and Xantos go at it again after a celebration in the ragged flagon, and Alinor joins an ill fated drinking contest.Series
- Part 18 of You're Gonna Go Far, Kid
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Osprey Ascends To Godhood by CalicoKitty402, TheFearsomeJabberwock, yelloskello
Fandoms: Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, Elder Scrolls
31 Oct 2025
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Summary
“Pweaf,” she said, her voice muffled by the blankets.
“That is not any language I am familiar with, girlie, n’ I am familiar with quite a few.” Xantos told her, his hand leaving her tit to gently take her by the jaw and hold up her head. She fixed him with a sardonic little look, and breathed in deep, enunciating as clearly as she could: “P l e a s e.”
Xantos grinned wider, giving her cheeks a little squeeze to purse her lips. “Please what?”
“Pleashe rearrange my damn inshidesh, Xhantosh Ashborne, before I bite your damn noshe off,” Osprey said as he wiggled her face for his own amusement. She made a noise similar to a cat getting its tail stepped on, whipping around as he got up. She rolled over onto her back- mouth open to give him a lecture... only to have him catch her mouth as he held himself above her. His hair had come out of the braid, creating a curtain around them.
“Y’wish s’ my command,” he whispered to her, voice low and rumbling out of his chest.
-Osprey and Xantos make up for lost time, now that he has recovered.
Series
- Part 17 of You're Gonna Go Far, Kid
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The Gang Needs To Talk About Franc by CalicoKitty402, TheFearsomeJabberwock, yelloskello
Fandoms: Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim, Elder Scrolls
27 Sep 2025
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Summary
“The little Magpie, I presume?” He asked, his voice like velvet over the words before he placed a piece of bread with cheese and meat into his mouth. “You’ll have to forgive my tardiness, I was waylaid.” He started to stand–first uncrossing his legs in a way that Osprey would only describe as flourished, before he rose to his full height. Not as tall as Xan, but… Close. Certainly. “It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance, madam,” he said, giving her an equally flourished bow. “I am–”
“Franc fuckin’ Delacourt,” Osprey breathed, staring at him like she was seeing a ghost–which, as far as she was concerned, she might as well be.
A wide smile spread across his mouth, the man looking entirely too pleased with the fact she knew him by name. “The one and only.”
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The gang really needs to talk about Franc.Series
- Part 16 of You're Gonna Go Far, Kid
Recent series
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You're Gonna Go Far, Kid by CalicoKitty402, TheFearsomeJabberwock, yelloskello
Fandom: Elder Scrolls, Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
18 Jan 2026
Summary
The great doors of Dragons Reach swung open, pillars lining a massive mead hall with great arching ceilings and balconies above. Once upon a time, in Skyrim’s more peaceful days, it would be host to every Jarl in the province, great moots held to determine the fate of Skyrim’s people.
As it was, the hall was empty save a single older man sitting upon a carved wooden throne and the court wizard in sleep clothes who went to stand behind him. His eyes had drifted closed, his breathing gentle and soft as he leaned hard against his palm. Ireleth took the steps up the dais two at a time, coming over.
“So the dragon has been driven off?” he asked quietly as the guards pulled Xantos up the last flight of stairs. One pattered up further, moving behind the throne while holding Xantos’ sword.
“Killed, my jarl, and I have brought the ones responsible- you’re... you’re not going to like it, my jarl.” Irileth looked over her shoulder to where the collected misfits were standing. "One of the heroes is a companion, the other is a dunmer girl, and a small breton mage-”
“And the last one is Xantos Ashborne.” Balgruuf finished. “How in oblivion did he end up fighting the dragon?”
- Words:
- 844,794
- Works:
- 20
- Bookmarks:
- 6
Recent bookmarks
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‘Anakin was like my brother,’ he admitted, a little sadly. ‘Cody was… different.’
‘And they’re both gone. Anakin and Cody are gone,’ Luke whispered, a wisp of sorrow and a wisp of hope intermingling in the Force. Ben hated that he had to be the one to kill the hope.
‘Yes, darling. They’re both gone,’ Ben whispered, running a callused hand through Luke’s soft hair. ‘But they both live on in our memories and in the Force.’
‘What was he like then? Tell me about him so he can live in my memory too.'
Or, Luke's Uncle Ben goes missing and a mercenary who shines like the sun helps find him.
Bookmarked by CalicoKitty402
20 Jan 2026
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Waterlogged Wonderings by Avaara_Nuor18
Fandoms: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Clone Wars (2003) - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
16 May 2022
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Obi-Wan didn't even think he had a soulmate until he was pulled out of the waters at Tibrin, thoroughly concussed. If only he had been aware enough to ask for his name, and Force what had he said to make the man laugh? oh, Force. Hopefully, he can clear up anything stupid he said when he figures out who the Trooper who saved his life is
Cody didn't even know what soulmates were until he pulled the (absolutely kriffin gorgeous) Jedi out of the waters of Tibrin. He was almost tempted to break protocol and ask for more information while they waited for medics to arrive when "if all I had to do to get held by a hot man in armor was get a head injury and nearly drown, I would do it more often. you must be my soulmate, cause you make my saber sing." and damn if that didn't make for the most awkward and strangely attractive opening ever.
Bookmarked by CalicoKitty402
20 Jan 2026
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Summary
On the winter solstice, a lone firewood peddler is rescued by the lord of the forest.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,675
- Chapters:
- 1/2
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 6
- Kudos:
- 87
- Bookmarks:
- 19
- Hits:
- 1,043
Bookmarked by CalicoKitty402
11 Jan 2026
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Diverging Tracks | Summer Pearls by Nastya_M_Steel
Fandom: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon - All Media Types, Pocket Monsters: Black & White | Pokemon Black and White Versions, Pocket Monsters: Diamond & Pearl & Platinum | Pokemon Diamond Pearl Platinum Versions, Pokemon Legends: Arceus (Video Game)
24 Sep 2022
Summary
Natsu didn't sign up for any of this. Granted, neither did Miyo.
Meanwhile, Emmet and Ingo adopt two traumatised teenagers while trying to find each other again.- Words:
- 34,745
- Works:
- 3
- Bookmarks:
- 34
Bookmarked by CalicoKitty402
08 Jan 2026
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Change of Fate by Yavannas_Tits
Fandoms: The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power (TV 2022)
07 Mar 2025
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Summary
Bilba Baggins has already done this once—survived a dragon, dwarves, and one particularly broody king. But after an old, tired life in the Shire, she wakes up to find herself back at the start of her journey, young and stubborn as ever.
This time, she’s writing everything down. This time, she’s making better decisions (probably). This time, she will make sure the line of Durin lives and that Frodo never gets his sweet hands on that blasted ring. And this time, she’s definitely not falling in love with Thorin Oakenshield again.
…Right?
Armed with a sharp tongue, handkerchiefs, and the exasperation of a grandmother wrangling a bunch of overgrown, bearded children, Bilba is determined to do things her way. Even if that means scolding dwarves, outmaneuvering Thranduil, and figuring out just what is going on with this new, stranger version of Middle-earth.
Because if she has to do this all over again, she’s going to do it right.
Bookmarked by CalicoKitty402
22 Dec 2025