Ineedthisname



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    Summary

    A series of Heated Rivalry crack/crack treated seriously fics. Primarily Yuri!!! on Ice crossovers, with a couple of canon compliant fics thrown in as well.

    Words:
    188,000
    Works:
    6
    Bookmarks:
    338

    06 May 2026

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    “Can’t hang out tonight, Hayd. I have plans.”

    “Bullshit,” Hayden responds. “You never have plans.”

    Objectively, this used to be true. Nowadays Shane has many, many plans, between his nightly plans to look at Ilya’s penis through Skype and his various long-term plans laid out helpfully in his notebook, Canva (For Ilya’s sake. He is a visual learner), and more recently, Excel. Shane loves that excel sheet. He’s colour coded it.

     

    In 2017, Shane Hollander spirals and proposes to his boyfriend of 4 days (or 7 years, or 9 years, or not his boyfriend at all, depending on how you look at it), which leads to a lot of plans, weird theories in the Montreal Voyageur locker room, some Twitter drama, and Ilya Rozanov entering his WAG era.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    118,858
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Comments:
    3,579
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    16,009
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    427,055

    03 May 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Unconnected one shots of me pushing Shane over the edge a bit just to see what happens. Will he punch someone? Yes. Will there be meltdowns? Also yes. Will he be a dick? Very likely.

    Words:
    21,776
    Works:
    4
    Bookmarks:
    204

    22 Apr 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

    Words:
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    Works:
    3
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    831

    13 Apr 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    “My boyfriend thinks I’m an idiot,” Ilya says. "Well, not really but a bit, maybe.”

    “Your boyfriend?” Sandra, the queer studies professor sits down, hard.

    “Yes, he thinks it is not smart to say faggot in the locker room when you are locked in the closet and Russia has the keys.”

    Ilya had been talking about himself when he’d said it. Making a joke. Sailing a little close to the wind, sick of listening to the background hum of homophobic bullshit. But someone had been filming. The video went viral. The Raiders panicked under the terrible PR. Now he was here.

    Sent to Queer Studies 101 to appease twitter. Because he’d been cancelled. For being a homophobe. If was fucking ridiculous.

    He turns to the professor. “So, can you help me take on Putin and NHL at same time or I need more advanced class for this?”

    Plus Chapter 2 – Social media chapter. Once they've been outed, Ilya gets to demand an apology from twitter.

    Language:
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    Words:
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    Chapters:
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    Comments:
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    12 Apr 2026