Mondwolf



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    The closest Alastor's ever gotten to romance comes in the form of—in order of increasing hilariousness—a couple of botched youthful attempts at kissing, cheap mass-produced smut comics, and the wildly entertaining tales of other people's sordid affairs.

    He's never wanted sex. He's never wanted love. He's never seen a problem with this.

    It's taken about a century, but he's pleasantly surprised to discover that the rest of the world is finally starting to catch up with his perspective.

    More than anything else, he’s pleased that these new modern attitudes have given him extra opportunities for bad puns.

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    18 Jan 2026

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    “Can ya teach me to play cards?”

    Husk’s wings retract. The glass nearly slips, but he’s quick to catch it, before rearing back on Angel with widened eyes. His pupils are like pinpoints — like a cat, Angel thinks, before shoving the thought away and taking a casual sip of his drink.

    (Husk had an inkling that Angel was a little ditzy, but not this ditzy.)

    “You want me to teach ya cards?”

     

    Husk and Angel bond a bit (and maybe flirt a bit too)

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    11 Jan 2026

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    Naturally, Husk’s kindness goes straight to Angel’s head. This is why he doesn’t do heroin — you try that shit once, you always want it. You may never take it again, but you’ll carry the gaping-aching hole in your chest until the end of your days. Or the end of eternity.

    ***
    Angel never needed aftercare before; he puts the blame squarely on Husk’s huggable shoulders.

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    26 Dec 2025

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    The cards weren’t in his favor. “Husker, are you infatuated with that arachnid strumpet?”

    “Yeah, yeah, I am,” he said, going for sarcasm and missing because of the weird panic that was edging into his laugh. “I’m thinkin’ a June wedding.”

    “It’ll lead right into a July funeral, I suspect,” Alastor laughed, slapping his hand on the bar. “No wonder you’re so interested in releasing him from his contract. If Valentino heard there was someone who loved his prized star, why he would be absolutely livid.”

    The cackle was unnecessary and Husk said as much, glowering. When that failed to shut him up, he waited until there was a lull and hissed, “Ya done?”

    There was a pause, a ‘no,’ and then another chorus of maniacal laughter that sent Pentious, who had come into the parlor for something, slithering away with nothing more than an eep and an apology.

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    21 Dec 2025

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Philosophers liked to pose the question, observation against perception: If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?

    Aziraphale would argue that sound was something witnessed, and Crowley would argue that if sound had to be witnessed, then why was virtue unwitnessed a nobler thing?

    But first, Crowley would point out that he himself had fallen, alone and without witness, and it had bloody fucking hurt.

    ---------------

    Or, in the aftermath of the Antichrist debacle, Heaven has other plans than Hellfire, and Aziraphale gives away his halo.

    (In which Season 2 is part of a time loop, London's Angel Station is highly questionable, and Aziraphale takes Crowley's memories. Written for the Ineffable Idiots Big Bang.)

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    16 Jul 2025