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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Damian pulls out his phone and dials Richard’s number- his chauffeur has been unfortunately painstakingly instructed to answer no calls whatsoever from Damian, and Alfred has begun to pretend that phones do not exist during school hours. Unsurprisingly, as it is eight in the morning, it goes to voicemail. Damian waits impatiently for the beep. “Richard,” he says, in tones of the deeply suffering, “this place is a hostile environment. I must be collected post-haste, as after this latest indignity I am dropping out. Come at once, or I may die here.”

    The dynamic duo attend a parent-teacher conference. No one has a good day.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,727
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    214
    Kudos:
    2,594
    Bookmarks:
    766
    Hits:
    15,090

    29 Dec 2025

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Babysitting. They'd woken him up to babysit.

    He should have stayed in the coffin.

    ~

    Damian scowled, folding his arms. "Where is father? And I'm nothing like you."

    "Kid, you're so much like me that Ra's once caught his bodyguards referring to you as 'little red riding hood'." He swallowed another bite before jumping off the counter, dusting his hands off. "And the rest of the clan went to Bludhaven till Saturday. S' just us."

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,218
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    83
    Kudos:
    1,139
    Bookmarks:
    240
    Hits:
    4,915

    07 Dec 2025

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Danny’s looking at him like he’s crazy. His hair’s dried up into a mess of waves, and there’s some tomato seeds on the corner of his mouth. “You just bailed me out of jail. And you think this is a good idea?”

    “I don’t have bad ideas, Fenton. And like you’ve just said, I have collateral on you.”

    “So you’re blackmailing me into pretending to date you?”

    Tim shrugs. “Or you could just sign the NDA.”

     

    OR

     

    Danny's trying to recover all the shards to an entity's chalice so that it'll stop destroying the zone while tensions rise amongst his subjects- and trying to finish high school.

    Tim's juggling his case load, his work as CEO, and does not have time to be embroiled in a sex scandal right now. If that means he has to pretend to date a very suspicious heir to a rival company, then so be it.

    It's a mutually beneficial relationship. So what if Tim's becoming a little too intrigued by the illusive, powerful Phantom? So what if Danny can't stand the Justice League for leaving him to deal with all of Amity's problems when he was just 14? That's a superhero thing.

    And their fake boyfriend has no clue that they're a superhero.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    282,278
    Chapters:
    50/50
    Comments:
    9,813
    Kudos:
    11,611
    Bookmarks:
    3,454
    Hits:
    410,017

    08 Aug 2025

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    A Disclaimer From Your Friendly Neighborhood Oracle:

    The following is a transcript of Patrol Communications Audio written by state of the art transcription technology, IRIS (Interpretation of Recorded Intelligence Software). IRIS was created to provide easily searchable records, automatically, and eliminate the need to transcribe each patrol audio log manually. That being said, IRIS is still experimental, and may not always be entirely accurate.
    -
    (01:25) Red Hood: (Mild static) (Out of breath, slurred) You motherfuckers. Put some fuckin-

    Batman: (Shaking) Red Hood-

    Red Hood: Shut up. Put some fucking respect. On my name. Start fucking copying me. I just got thrown fucking. Um. 40 feet. Into a fucking uh. What's it. Ditch. I'm still fucking conscious.

    Batman: Red Hood, do not move, we're en route-

    Red Hood: What'll I win if I stand up.

    Batman: (Loud) Do not stand up.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,825
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    652
    Kudos:
    6,482
    Bookmarks:
    2,634
    Hits:
    42,965

    26 Jul 2025

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Damian brings a cat to the manor. Jason knows that's no cat.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,215
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    23
    Kudos:
    653
    Bookmarks:
    118
    Hits:
    4,996

    25 Jul 2025

  6. Public Bookmark *

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    Tim's never regretted his decision to go to Barbara Gordon when Batman began to fall apart after Robin's death. He does reserve the right to complain when strange men in masks begin to use him as an intermediary for Oracle though.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,705
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    210
    Kudos:
    8,171
    Bookmarks:
    1,439
    Hits:
    129,794

    11 Apr 2025

  7. Public Bookmark *

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    He needed Peter.

    So he followed him. Quietly. Carefully. Religiously.

    He mapped Peter’s class schedule in his head. Memorized his grocery list. Noted the exact way his fingers scratched behind his ear when he was deep in thought, the way he hummed low and off-key when he didn’t think anyone could hear. Tim knew he liked the rain, that he always paused for it. Knew he hated silence — filled it with podcasts, music, half-spoken thoughts, anything to keep it away.

    He didn’t expect Peter to notice. He certainly didn’t expect Peter to turn around one night — high above the city, where the air was thinner and the noise finally died down — and look him dead in the eyes.

    “You know,” Peter said, one eyebrow raised, “most people would just ask for my number.”

    And just like that, the watcher became the watched.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,606
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    187
    Kudos:
    5,846
    Bookmarks:
    1,316
    Hits:
    38,298

    08 Apr 2025

  8. Public Bookmark *

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    Tim Drake had absolutely no intentions of ever becoming anyone's sugar daddy when he met Superboy.

    This would have worked out better for him if Superboy had ever had an actual legal identity or an actual legal guardian or just . . . literally anything whatsoever in life. Ever. At all.

    Just a bank account, even.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    81,629
    Chapters:
    10/?
    Collections:
    9
    Comments:
    1,756
    Kudos:
    6,345
    Bookmarks:
    1,937
    Hits:
    98,359

    01 Apr 2025

  9. Public Bookmark *

    Summary

    Conrad is just your average Crime Alley street-rat.

    Ignore how most of his extended family actively Hench for various Rogues, he went no-contact years ago.

    Ignore his unreal fighting ability and expansive range of random skills, it's the bare minimum of what anyone would need to make it to 20 while homeless in Crime Alley.

    Ignore the Red Hood's attempts at flirting with him, he's pretty sure he's just misinterpreting his overboss' perfectly platonic actions.

    Ignore the people who say he comes back from the dead, no one around here knows how to check for a pulse.

    Ignore the Bats, he's certainly trying to. Whatever they're after, it's certainly not him.

    He's just a completely normal Crime Alley kid, after all.

    Words:
    203,053
    Works:
    7
    Bookmarks:
    451

    20 Mar 2025

  10. Public Bookmark *

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    Losing Damian not only hurt beyond measure but also made Dick the last Bat standing. He had nothing keeping him in a broken world so goes back in time with only one ally (Damian begs to differ) and no plan except to protect everyone he can, at any cost.

    Dick starts with making sure Jason never dies at the hands of the Joker and proceeds to track down and love his siblings (while maybe also plotting the destruction of the League of Assassins). He just doesn't realize that a clan of highly trained vigilantes are more than capable of realizing that Dick is not okay, and of returning his devotion with their own.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    89,785
    Chapters:
    18/18
    Collections:
    69
    Comments:
    3,159
    Kudos:
    19,254
    Bookmarks:
    5,768
    Hits:
    603,616

    12 Mar 2025

  11. Public Bookmark *

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    “So, what, you were just watching me in my sleep?” Jason snarls. “Do you have any idea how creepy that is?”

    “Well, you did say my name,” Slade says wryly. “Sounded an awful lot like an invitation.”

    [In which Jason gets injured and lets Slade take care of him... in more ways than one. This is filthy, but also a whole lot softer than it has any right to be.]

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    23,480
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    315
    Kudos:
    1,596
    Bookmarks:
    303
    Hits:
    30,915

    10 Mar 2025

  12. Public Bookmark *

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    “Before you ask – that is absolutely a gun in my pants and no, I am not happy to see you.”

    Or, Red Hood accidentally swipes one of Deathstroke’s contracts, and Slade hasn’t stopped stalking Jason since.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,326
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    174
    Kudos:
    3,144
    Bookmarks:
    666
    Hits:
    29,786

    08 Feb 2025

  13. Public Bookmark *

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    Jason had known Louise for years. She’d been his getaway driver, his alibi, a co-conspirator. He had bailed her out of the trouble she got herself into more times than he could count. With a straight face she told Batman she had never even heard of the Red Hood, while he was passed out on her couch. He confirmed to many an HR department that she definitely worked for him, uh-huh, five years in accounts? Absolutely, best accountant he’d ever had. She’d been ‘borrowing’ his vacuum cleaner for years now. He attended her grandpa's funeral.

    Boyfriends and girlfriends came and went. Heroes and villains, dubious costumes and harebrained schemes.

    They remained.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    125,737
    Chapters:
    34/34
    Comments:
    1,925
    Kudos:
    2,673
    Bookmarks:
    887
    Hits:
    55,197

    03 Feb 2025

  14. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Intergalactic negotiations are difficult.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,157
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    298
    Kudos:
    12,020
    Bookmarks:
    2,353
    Hits:
    73,307

    25 Jan 2025

  15. Public Bookmark *

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    When Tim presents as an omega, his parents decide to get the only use they can out of him by marrying him off.
    To Bruce Wayne.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    62,185
    Chapters:
    25/?
    Collections:
    7
    Comments:
    1,771
    Kudos:
    4,873
    Bookmarks:
    1,026
    Hits:
    101,162

    06 Jan 2025

  16. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Tim Drake stops stalking Gotham’s nocturnal wildlife when she goes to college. Unfortunately, they don’t return the favor.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    48,880
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    496
    Kudos:
    3,373
    Bookmarks:
    1,307
    Hits:
    32,198

    28 Dec 2024

  17. Public Bookmark *

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    “I want it on record that I think this is a terrible idea and I’m only doing this to mitigate the damage."
    AKA
    Red Robin decides it's a great idea to livestream patrol while Batman's off-world. It goes about as well as you'd expect.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,822
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    102
    Comments:
    517
    Kudos:
    18,025
    Bookmarks:
    5,517
    Hits:
    98,363

    26 Dec 2024

  18. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Jason Todd wakes up every morning in a desert compound. Trapped. Empty. Alone. He doesn't remember much, but it doesn't matter, because one thing is for certain.

    He has an infant to protect.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    173,982
    Chapters:
    65/65
    Collections:
    16
    Comments:
    8,570
    Kudos:
    11,459
    Bookmarks:
    2,941
    Hits:
    359,119

    22 Dec 2024

  19. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Jason Todd presents as an omega. This doesn't fix everything, but it does change everything.

    Or: Jason dies, un-dies, gets dunked in a Pit, presents, and is given Damian. Having a purpose - something to protect - lets him heal, and eventually, he goes home.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    84,917
    Chapters:
    18/18
    Comments:
    1,977
    Kudos:
    10,377
    Bookmarks:
    2,623
    Hits:
    207,372

    16 Dec 2024

  20. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    If anyone asked the Batfamily which Robin had the funniest ’joining the family’ story? Well, everyone would start with, “Well it seemed like Jason had the spot taken for good after having the audacity to try and jack the Batmobile’s tires and hit Bruce with his tire iron.” And then they’d say, “But then tiny Tim decided to try and steal the whole thing.”

     

    Or: When Tim is 11 he figures it’s not hurting anyone if he. Ya know. Takes a picture in the Batmobile. But then the power goes to his head and all of a sudden he’s hacking the Batmobile and tearing through Gotham on a rescue mission.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,115
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    884
    Kudos:
    17,821
    Bookmarks:
    4,538
    Hits:
    121,606

    11 Dec 2024

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