CharlieThePheyPhemMess

Dan Howell on a treadmill looking fruity asf



Recent works

Recent bookmarks

  1. Public Bookmark 3

    Tags
    Summary

    After Crowley creates trouble for Aziraphale in the court of King Henry VIII, a new form of apology is devised.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    800
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    30
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    143

    26 Apr 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    CROWLEY: I try not to make a habit of gratitude, but I must give our appreciation to everyone out there who’s been listening and subscribing to The Ineffable Plan.
    AZIRAPHALE: Ooh, yes, we’ve become quite popular, haven’t we?
    CROWLEY: Yeah, just hit number eight on the advice charts … No advertising at all.
    AZIRAPHALE: Mm. How … miraculous.
    CROWLEY: … Aziraphale. You did not.

     

    ***

    Crowley and Aziraphale are very possibly the people least qualified, on the entire planet, to start up an advice podcast.

    But what else is there to do when the world isn’t ending anytime soon, you’re technically on indefinite sabbatical from your lifelong careers, and you need a plausible excuse to spend more time with your best friend who you’re definitely not, absolutely not, maybe just a little, actually maybe overwhelmingly in love with?

    ***

    Now in podfic form!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    16
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    4
    Comments:
    98
    Kudos:
    728
    Bookmarks:
    230
    Hits:
    12,086

    15 Apr 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    CROWLEY: I try not to make a habit of gratitude, but I must give our appreciation to everyone out there who’s been listening and subscribing to The Ineffable Plan.
    AZIRAPHALE: Ooh, yes, we’ve become quite popular, haven’t we?
    CROWLEY: Yeah, just hit number eight on the advice charts … No advertising at all.
    AZIRAPHALE: Mm. How … miraculous.
    CROWLEY: … Aziraphale. You did not.

     

    ***

    Crowley and Aziraphale are very possibly the people least qualified, on the entire planet, to start up an advice podcast.

    But what else is there to do when the world isn’t ending anytime soon, you’re technically on indefinite sabbatical from your lifelong careers, and you need a plausible excuse to spend more time with your best friend who you’re definitely not, absolutely not, maybe just a little, actually maybe overwhelmingly in love with?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,541
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    9
    Comments:
    1,196
    Kudos:
    22,241
    Bookmarks:
    5,910
    Hits:
    145,283

    15 Apr 2026

  4. Public Bookmark 12

    Tags
    Summary

    After his disastrous attempt to wipe out the entirety of the Pride Ring, Vox has hit rock bottom.

    Sick of repeatedly needing to clean up after Vox's mess, tired of the constant worry and stress that follows babysitting a suicidal man-child for 3 weeks straight, the other Vees are almost relieved to hear they have the option to hand Vox over to the Hazbin Hotel as a punishment ordered by Heaven for his attempted uprising.

    Vox isn't happy about his situation at all. Stuck in the same hotel he worked so hard to ruin, with none other than the bane of all his problems, Alastor, who finds the media demons predicament more than amusing to watch and meddle with.

    Still, as time passes, Vox has to consider - is trying to change for the better really the worst punishment?

    Probably, yeah.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,168
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    37
    Kudos:
    68
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    1,079

    18 Jan 2026

  5. Public Bookmark 23

    Tags
    Summary

    During a depressive episode, Dan starts thinking about how strange it is that water is necessary for human survival, but can also be deadly in so many ways (waterborne illnesses, flooding, accidental drownings, etc.). The more he thinks about this, the more his mental and physical health start to deteriorate. Phil doesn't understand Dan's obsession with water at first. By the time he realizes what's going on, damage has already been done.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,866
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    173
    Bookmarks:
    23
    Hits:
    1,026

    04 Jan 2026