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  1. *

    Words:
    145,995
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    3
    Bookmarks:
    109
  2. *

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    Quick oneshot that I needed to get out of my head!

    Inspired by a work I cannot find on AO3 any longer: "What?" wherein Bilbo gets her period and the dwarves believe she has been injured.

    Language:
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    1,552
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    21,025
  3. 33

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    Unpleasant words overheard in a tavern of Minas Tirith prompt Legolas and Gimli to ponder the nature of mannish identities—a question whose answer lies far beyond the ken of both Elves and Dwarves. (Fortunately, they know a certain White Lady of Ithilien who may be amenable to shedding some light on the oddities of her people's culture for them.)

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    16,130
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    41
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    Bookmarks:
    33
    Hits:
    2,051
  4. *

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    When Gimli is but a child, he gets lost in the mines of Ered Luin. It is dark, and it is cold, and he is alone.

    He will never recover.

    With his shaking hands and his Stonefear Gimli cannot perform as well as he wished, as a Dwarf. He can't go on a Quest to reclaim Erebor. He can't go on a Quest to reclaim Khazad-dûm.

    He can, however, force his way into the Quest to save all of Middle-Earth.

    There he meets Legolas, who reminds him too much of his friend Ori, in many ways.

    Language:
    English
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    11,633
    Chapters:
    5/5
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    Comments:
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    973
    Bookmarks:
    225
    Hits:
    6,944
  5. *

    Words:
    18,221
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    6
    Bookmarks:
    409
  6. *

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    Bilbo emerges from the Battle of Five Armies with a bit more than a knock on the head.

    Language:
    English
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    23,376
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    38
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    893
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    180
    Hits:
    9,002
  7. *

    Words:
    19,224
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    354
  8. *

    Summary

    In which Legolas has anxiety and Gimli learns how to become his rock. Fits with book canon.

    Words:
    433,720
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    Bookmarks:
    228
  9. 80

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    Why was it called "The Hobbit" when most of the people going were dwarves?

    Why is our point-of-view character supposed to be a little Englishman wandering the world, and not the people fighting to reclaim their own homeland?

    Here's my attempt at a decolonized retelling of the Quest for Erebor.

    Stone-sense, culture clash, plenty of porn, and the enigma of Nori: the Quest, as experienced by Dwalin son of Fundin, Company Master-at-Arms and Defense.

    Series
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    Chapters:
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    Comments:
    1,675
    Kudos:
    442
    Bookmarks:
    80
    Hits:
    18,665
  10. *

    Summary

    Stories featuring Legolas and Gimli, set within the bounds and confines of canon. They have been assembled here in chronological order although they do not necessarily all exist within the same continuity or abide by the same internal canon or sequence of events; but they are all stories that could, and might, take place within the canonical Legendarium. Because I think we can all agree that it is indeed time to say more on this matter.

    Words:
    116,241
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    122
  11. *

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    Chapter 2 added: now complete!

    Bodies, sex, gender, culture, politics: everything is different between them, and nothing fits.

    #
    I like it, Legolas thinks. How he looks, how he is. And it’s just too strange a thought to handle.

    Language:
    English
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    11,792
    Chapters:
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    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    127
    Kudos:
    1,898
    Bookmarks:
    329
    Hits:
    17,200
  12. 33

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    Bilbo Baggins left Erebor, before Thorin Oakenshield’s fate was certain. For all that they shared (including their bed), the chasm between them seems too deep to bridge, even when Bilbo returns to Thorin’s side in time of need, selflessly devoting himself to the King even when he has reason to believe Thorin doesn’t feel the same for him.

    A story in which our two favourite idiots manage to talk circles around each other without getting to the point, Bilbo meets Thorin at death’s door a second time, Dís is sort of bullying Thorin into happiness, and there’s a whole lot of miscommunication and world building just the way Erebor is rebuilt.

    Language:
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    Chapters:
    18/?
    Comments:
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    Bookmarks:
    33
    Hits:
    4,837
  13. *

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    Third in a few one-shots/short stories that I have written about how Billa Baggins adjusts to life post-quest and the struggles that the Company of Thorin Oakenshield face as they try to understand Hobbit customs (and teach Dwarrow traditions).

    Several months after "On Courses," Billa and Thorin are settling into married life—though it is not without its ups and downs with their busy schedules. Billa is also about to realize her education in terms of Dwarrow culture is quite lacking when it comes to one topic: children. When a Dwarrowdam is pregnant, she always wears a shawl with a specific pattern and symbol on it to make sure others know she is pregnant. Moreover, expecting Dwarrowdams are worshipped—Dwarrow will do anything for them and are even more overprotective due to low birth rates. We all know; however that children are far from rare in the Shire—and a shawl is a shawl, isn't it?

    Series
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    Chapters:
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    Comments:
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    Bookmarks:
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    Hits:
    27,669
  14. *

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    Second in a few one-shots/short stories that I have written about how Billa Baggins adjusts to life post-quest and the struggles that the Company of Thorin Oakenshield face as they try to understand Hobbit customs (and teach Dwarrow traditions).

    Dwarrow are incredibly secretive when it comes to their culture, and especially their Dwarrowdams. What few outsiders know is that part of their infertility issues stems from Dwarrowdams only getting their period once or twice a year—and it’s an over the top painful thing. So, in Dwarrow law, when a Dwarrowdam has her courses, they can get away with pretty much anything but murder, aren’t expected to do anything, and any Dwarrow around them trip over themselves to do their bidding—lest they face their Dwarrowdam's wrath. For Hobbits, your courses are monthly, and Billa is quite confused why the Company is tip-toeing around her.

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    Hits:
    27,265
  15. *

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    The first dwarf Kíli tells is Fíli and it surprises no one.

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    Hits:
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  16. 39

    Words:
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    Works:
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    Bookmarks:
    39
  17. 1

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    Based on the Sonne MV!

    Once upon a time, there were six little dwarves who lived in the forest and mined for a living. They were happy together and all in love with each other, but then everything changed...

    The six Rammstein Dwarves are not having a good time. Their lives were once simple and fulfilling, but now things have gone badly wrong. Controlled by the cruel Snow White and her gold addiction, they're reduced to nothing but her servants. But when Flake is sent out late one night, he stumbles upon you, a powerful witch who lives alone in the woods. Can you be the one to help them escape their evil mistress?

    Language:
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    9,076
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Collections:
    1
    Kudos:
    5
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    138
  18. 2

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    Overworked and with a grandchild on the way, Balen the dwarf is offered a reprieve unexpected place. However nothing in this world is free and the cost of salvation will cost him more than he anticipated.

    Language:
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    Kudos:
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    Hits:
    312
  19. 33

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    An interlude set in the universe of "No Heir of Durin" - Dwarven gender is complicated, and Frodo is Thorin and Bilbo's biological son. This was not exactly planned.

    Of course, Dwalin was the first one to figure it out.

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    Comments:
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    Kudos:
    647
    Bookmarks:
    33
    Hits:
    9,415
  20. *

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    In which Frodo is Bilbo and Thorin’s son.

    Not mpreg or fem!Bilbo. Canon compliant, save for a bit of fiddling with timelines and genetics. That’s what makes it hurt.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,788
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    116
    Kudos:
    1,159
    Bookmarks:
    148
    Hits:
    18,571

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