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  1. Tags
    Summary

    On a drunk night out with Dev and Niall, Baz writes on a wall in the loo at a pub 'Cure to loneliness XXXX-XXX-XXX (his number)'. Simon finds a phone that one of the boys at the home left when they got adopted but doesn't use it because he has no one to text. Agatha would tell him not to because the Mage forbid it and Penny doesn't like texting. A few months later, Penny visits Simon at the care home over break and sneaks him out to a pub. Simon sees the number written in the loo while he's tipsy. And so, begins the texting.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,083
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    1
    Hits:
    9
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Once, Simon Snow was just a boy—plucked from obscurity and given a place among nobles. A future as a knight. A hero. There, he met Baz, an arrogant young prince who, in a rare moment of trust, revealed himself to be something else—something more. Over the years, as political tensions surged, the two forged a bond deeper than duty. One that could ruin them both.

    At twenty-five, Simon Snow isn’t a hero. He’s broken. Disillusioned. Angry. And he’s searching for something.


    Updates every other Sunday.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    31,159
    Chapters:
    6/20
    Comments:
    178
    Kudos:
    131
    Bookmarks:
    30
    Hits:
    2,652
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Simon is getting nervous about the slump in his relationship with Agatha as they get close to entering their Senior Year of high school, so the obvious solution is to send her a dick pic! Unfortunately, the picture is accidentally sent to none other than the only son of White Chapel's First Family, Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch. Will Simon's already sordid reputation in the small town going to take an unrecoverable hit? Or will the picture spark a new wave of even more sordid secrets and incorrigible behavior?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,840
    Chapters:
    1/7
    Collections:
    1
    Kudos:
    7
    Hits:
    44
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Simon Snow, once a child star in David Cadwallader's hit movie trilogy The Greatest Mage, now a messy young adult, is trying to promote his director debut, while his rival, Baz Pitch, a pop star, is rolling out his new album. After being noticed together at an event and immediately shipped by fans, both become more popular than ever. They decide to grab the opportunity and arrange a fake relationship. For the sake of PR, obviously.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,188
    Chapters:
    4/10
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    21
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    213
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Placing his hand back on Baz's stomach, Simon felt the movement again. Sucking in a sharp breath as the notion that this was real stuck in his mind.

    "I-I..." He was at a loss for words. Baz was right, his magic was strong enough to do anything. This was his doing. And he hadn't a clue how to feel about it.

    All he'd ever wanted was a real family. Not to mention he'd been having those dreams - of him and Baz in that little cottage with a child. Whenever he had them, he woke up elated.

    But there was a difference between dreams and reality. The reality of Baz actually being pregnant was terrifying.

    Sitting back to let Baz up, Simon pulled at his own curls. Looking to Baz with desperation in his voice. "What do we do?"

    Or, one drunken night knocks the course for their entire eighth year and quite possibly their entire lives.

    (Updates every Sunday)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    43,841
    Chapters:
    23/?
    Comments:
    74
    Kudos:
    173
    Bookmarks:
    18
    Hits:
    4,588
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Beep.

     

    “He’s waking up!”

     

    Beep.

     

    “Hey, are y… sir?”

     

    Beep.

     

    “...hear me?”

     

    Beep.

     

    “Simon?”

     

    Beep.

     

    Beep.

     

    Beep.

     

    Beep.

     

    “Ugh,” Baz groaned, reaching over me to turn off the alarm.

    I didn’t move, even when his hand dropped onto my chest, tracing a line connecting my moles.

    “Morning, love,” he breathed, voice groggy. I brought a hand up to play with his hair absently.

    “I… had the weirdest dream.”

    ____

    Simon's been feeling strange. He tells himself that he has no reason to be on edge; they defeated the Humdrum and the Mage, and now he's spending every day in domestic bliss with his best friend and boyfriend.

    But something nags at him, fills his dreams with strange, vague messages that he doesn't understand.

    He's stumped, and at this point he's almost able to accept it as one of those trauma-responses Penny keeps going on about.

    Almost.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,579
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    18
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    120
  7. Tags
    Summary

    A month into fifth year, Simon has the perfect plan to prove that Baz is a vampire, and to thwart any plots he might plan against him.

    Too bad he dragged an unwilling humdrum into this entire mess.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    36,542
    Chapters:
    12/?
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    15
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    455
  8. Tags
    Summary

    Simon Snow has been the Chosen One for most of his life, but when Lucy comes through the Veil, he learns that he's actually the problem he was raised to defeat... What's he going to do?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    577
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Kudos:
    3
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    23
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Simon’s in his thirties and suddenly unemployed. His old job had its downsides, but he felt useful, full of purpose—and he didn’t have to worry about pesky things like making more than one friend, or minding his personal safety, or even picking out his own clothes (the uniform might have been the best part). Now he’s adrift, and he can’t even talk about it—revealing even an ex-Batman’s secret identity comes with some pretty hefty penalties, after all. But that shouldn’t be a problem—who’s he gonna tell, anyway?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,331
    Chapters:
    5/6
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    83
    Kudos:
    47
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    694
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Simon Snow had known Baz Pitch for years. But after everything they went through, Simon just couldn't make it work. So when he found their bands playing at the same festival, he knew he had one last chance to piece them both back together.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,013
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Kudos:
    9
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    424
  11. Tags
    Summary

    Every year in Watford's Department of Theatre Arts goes just about the same way. Simon Snow gets the lead, Agatha Wellbelove plays the love interest, and Basilton Grimm-Pitch is stuck with the villain. A tale as old as time and type-casting. But what happens when Miss Possibelf decides to switch things up in their 8th year and casts Simon and Baz as lovers? How will Agatha cope with taking on a much brighter place in the spotlight? How will Simon put up with Baz's constant plotting and manipulation? And most importantly, how in Aleistar Crowley's name is Baz going to survive having to kiss the hopeless idiot he's in love with onstage?

    OR
    Simon Snow getting to be the theatre kid he was always meant to be.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,002
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    22
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    219
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Because if you want it to be, dancing can be well gay.
    Simon and Baz spend several chapters attempting to have a dance together and of course their world comes entirely too close to ending before they succeed, because this is SnowBaz and it’s supposed to be dramatic. Featuring a Simon Snow who has no idea what Drag Race is (when would he have seen it) and a Tyrannus Basilton Pitch who knows but has bigger things to worry about, like surviving this fic.

    Expect angst, fluff, hurt/comfort, hurt/no comfort, platonic queerness, dance trivia, and frequent edits. This idea came to me days ago but I wrote the last chapter first before I figured out that I want to tell the story backwards.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    670
    Chapters:
    1/4
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    8
    Hits:
    67
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Kent, England- Summer 1986.
    Through dangers untold, and hardships unnumbered, Simon Snow must fight his way to the castle beyond the Goblin City, and take back what the Goblin King has stolen. Simon must learn that he cannot rely on sheer strength and reckless determination alone to make his way through King Basilton's Labyrinth, where nothing can be taken for granted.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,743
    Chapters:
    3/13
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    6
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    117
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Simon Snow reluctantly embarks on a renovation project at Pitch Manor, owned by Baz Pitch, his former school nemesis and ex-roommate. Despite initial reluctance, Simon finds himself drawn to Baz's unexpected kindness and the memories of their complicated past. As they navigate the restoration together, old tensions give way to a newfound understanding and undeniable chemistry. Simon begins to see Baz in a better light, noticing how time has softened his edges and maybe he's more than the unemotional statue he was a decade ago. When the dust of the renovation is settled, Simon wonders if it'll be the last time he sees Baz.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    26,857
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    79
    Kudos:
    126
    Bookmarks:
    20
    Hits:
    2,244
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Something is wrong with Baz. And no, it's not the fact that he's a blood-sucking vampire or that he's been missing for almost two months. And it's not the actual thing wrong with him that I've non-stop ranted about for the entirety of our time at Watford—he's evil—no, something is just off. Ever since he came back from his brief holiday from eighth year, something's not been right. Penny thinks I should stop worrying about it. Is that what I'm doing—worrying? He's not the same Baz, almost as if he's a shadow of himself.

    ---

    Simon Snow always thinks his vampire (and evil) roommate, Baz Pitch, is plotting his demise. But when he comes back late to their eighth (and final) year at Watford, Simon can tell that something is not right. After breaking up with his long standing girlfriend, Agatha Wellbelove, and the war against the Humdrum and the Old Families coming to a close, Simon is feeling a little lost, something that Baz is also feeling. Maybe, somehow, they'll bond over their miserable lives and just maybe, something more will bloom in the process.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,823
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    6
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    103
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Simon Snow Cadwallader is looking for answers and hoping not to find them. His father's notebooks with him, he roams the world trying to prove that the supernatural isn't real. That there are no prophecies, no Chosen Ones, no hidden meanings in the history of humanity.

    Basilton Grimm-Pitch is tired of asking the wrong questions. Stuck in the basement of the British Museum, he looks at decades of stolen history piling up around him and knows that there is something more concealed inside forgotten crates of dusty terracotta.

    When Simon's quests lead him to seek Baz's expertise, they soon realise that maybe they've been looking for the same thing all along.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,894
    Chapters:
    1/19
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    9
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    109
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Every time I see someone at risk, I run down a list of questions:

    1. Can I save them?
    2. Will I put anyone else at risk by saving them?
    3. What comes after?

    Penny says that she used to think that whenever someone entered into your life, if you took your relationship with them seriously enough to, for instance, save their life, that you became responsible for them. That it was like picking up a piece of litter. If you see it and you don't pick it up, it's not your problem, but if you pick it up, you can't just drop it again. That makes you the litterer.

    Or something.

    I don't worry much about litter anymore. No one is coming to empty the bins, and saving someone's life isn't a contract. It's a Tuesday.

    Or: Simon Snow and the Zombie Apocalypse

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,968
    Chapters:
    1/2
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    11
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    77
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Simon Snow, bastard son of the late Lord Stark, hopes to escape his tainted status by joining the Night's Watch. It pains him to leave his best friend and half-brother behind, but he wants to be somewhere his name doesn't matter. It seems to work out, except for a mysterious high born man who just keeps pushing his buttons. Can these two survive The Wall together? Or will they kill each other before the Wights have a chance.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    35,735
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    47
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    526
  19. Tags
    Summary

    “I think Agatha’s in love with Baz. And he’s not even here! He should be here.” I’m so frustrated and exhausted that I’m losing control over my magic once again. I can feel it rolling off of me in waves.

    Penny sighs.

    “Agatha’s not really in love with Baz. She’s just looking for something that sticks. It’s romantic to be in love with a dead vampire.”

    My heart stutters in my chest. “Dead?” is all I manage to get out, though a hundred responses to Penny’s statement are suddenly swirling around my head.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,941
    Chapters:
    3/10
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    18
    Kudos:
    27
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    197
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Baz would like nothing more than to walk away from a fight over a crown he doesn't want, but a certain knight in shining armor has him captivated and stuck in a house that doesn't understand him.
    Simon never thought he'd live this long, let alone become a top knight in the King's regime.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,410
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    15
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    241

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