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“I ever tell you I used to be a stripper?”
No, Eddie thought, some hysterical kind of indignation slipping into his mind. No, Buck hadn't told him. And why not? Was he planning to use those skills with the guy who looked like the walking personification of a weed pen? Was he just planning to…
Eddie got lost in his quickly forming images of Buck.
As a stripper.
Stripper Buck.
Buck stripping.
Buck naked.
Straight guys sometimes pictured their friends naked. So normal. Just human nature.
OR -
Eddie works out what his joy looks like enough to start making moves on Buck, but does not get far enough to figure out what that means for him. He is also haunted by Chappell Roan.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 26,070
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 154
- Kudos:
- 3,668
- Bookmarks:
- 731
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- 36,852
Bookmarked by oldfashionedmorphine
04 Apr 2025
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When Bobby had arranged the camping trip, it was with a particular goal in mind, one which he had expressed to his wife early on in the planning.
“And how are you going to make that happen? They’ll get a whiff of you interfering and it’ll be game over,” Athena had commented, but despite sharing her namesake’s wit, she didn’t understand the 118 quite as well as he did.
“I don’t have to do any interfering. All I need to do is get them there, and the rest will work itself out.”
And he was right. A little too right.
Secrets are spilled and truths brought to light when the 118 and their partners go on a camping trip.
Oh, and there’s malaphors. Lots of malaphors.
Series
- Part 1 of Camping Fic
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 19,762
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 127
- Kudos:
- 1,904
- Bookmarks:
- 465
- Hits:
- 21,864
Bookmarked by oldfashionedmorphine
02 Mar 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
loved every second of this! and the art made me giggle 🤭
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He saw what Tommy must have seen, Buck who was so obviously jealous of them. Buck who always defaulted to Eddie’s side. Buck who asked Tommy to move in despite wanting Eddie to go to the stupid basketball game with him a few hours earlier.
My attention?
You can take Eddie if you want.
I’m not your last.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh no.
Oh fuck.
OR -
After Buck gets dumped, he remembers he agreed to go to Abby's wedding with a date. Eddie steps up and pretends to be his boyfriend. All hell breaks loose.
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“Someone referred to me as your wife the other day.” Buck started.
Eddie choked on air. His cheeks were so pink. Why did he blush like that? Buck was paler than him, and yet somehow he didn’t blush anywhere near as hard as Eddie himself did.
“Do you think of me as your old ball and chain?” Eddie asked, going along with the joke despite the frankly upsetting colour of his cheeks. How was this Buck looking in love with him? Obviously they were comfortable with each other, but still.
Buck gasped, his eyes big, his back straightening out as he got ready to fight with God himself on this topic. Eddie knew immediately the rant he had started, Buck’s mockingly serious voice raising as he stared Eddie down intently.
“I would never refer to my wife as the old ball and chain. You don’t hold me down, you pick me up, you dirty little bitch. You’re the wind beneath my wings. God.”
OR -
Buddie as The Basement Yard boys.
Series
- Part 1 of Buddie as the Basement Yard
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 18,431
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 193
- Kudos:
- 4,469
- Bookmarks:
- 870
- Hits:
- 44,232
Bookmarked by oldfashionedmorphine
26 Dec 2024
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LAFD Updates (@L*A*F*D_Metro)
LAFD Alert: Red-level traffic on Gardiner Road this morning. If you are trying to get into the city centre consider taking Westerley Lane.buck 🔥🔥 (@firebuck)
so true bestie
or, Eddie mans the LAFD Twitter account. Buck tries to be supportive.Series
- Part 1 of Mr LAFD Updates Man
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,000
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 5
- Comments:
- 823
- Kudos:
- 20,741
- Bookmarks:
- 3,411
- Hits:
- 161,755
Bookmarked by oldfashionedmorphine
19 Dec 2024
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“I’ll do it,” Eddie repeats, looking at Buck in one of those silent conversation ways again, but Buck actually can’t figure out what he’s trying to say this time. It messes with his brain, until Eddie speaks again, “I’ll pretend to only be a little offended none of you have thought to ask me before, but Buck, I’ve fixed a lot of cars. I can look at yours.”
(or, the check engine light comes on in Buck's Jeep, Eddie volunteers to fix it and carpool with him in the meantime, and it all breaks down from there, literally and metaphorically)
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Eddie can’t move. Like this, Buck is illuminated by the sunlight streaming through the window; dust motes shimmering around his head, his hair haloed in gold. Beautiful, Eddie thinks. And to his surprise, he doesn’t feel any sort of guilt about doing so.
Except — he should. Because Buck is dating Tommy, and he’s happy, and Eddie would rather go to his grave repressed and miserable than ever take away from Buck’s happiness.
Or: Eddie starts to untangle his complicated feelings about himself, and Buck. Mainly Buck.
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burn the straw house down by rarakiplin (gmontys) for catchingpapermoons
Fandoms: 9-1-1 (TV)
06 Sep 2022
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Summary
“Why the fuck are you even in this loop? This day isn’t about you.”
“Well, I die,” Eddie comments idly, not sounding as offended as he maybe should be. “Haven’t you heard? I’m always dying.”
“That’s not funny.”
Eddie shrugs, not really agreeing or disagreeing. It’s a few seconds before he says, eyes still closed, “Maybe I’m here so you’re not alone.”
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or, buck gets stuck in time, has a break down and then, relatedly, a break through
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 40,271
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 236
- Kudos:
- 2,936
- Bookmarks:
- 1,010
- Hits:
- 42,136
Bookmarked by oldfashionedmorphine
01 Sep 2024
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Summary
There's a beat of silence. A smile blossoms on Buck's face. It starts with a twitch at the corner of his mouth, then spreads inwards. He purses his lips, almost like he's trying to contain it, then gives up and lets it bloom into a brilliant smirk, crooked and devastating on his warm lips. He cracks open one eye, the left one. The smirk creases his birthmark. It's the same shade of pink as his lips, the same color as the lightning scar.
"Oh yeah?"
Eddie clears his throat and frees his own sandwich from its plastic prison. "Eat so you don't collapse. Save us both the trouble."
He can still feel Buck's eyes on him. "I don't break that easily."
Or:
Chris is 800 miles away, and Eddie's house feels emptier than ever. As always, Buck is right there, ready to have his back, to catch him without hesitation if he falls. This is familiar, this is normal, this is the way they've always been.
This is fine, until it isn't.
Until Eddie finds himself drawn to Buck in ways he never expected—ways that might not be so new at all.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 108,000
- Chapters:
- 16/16
- Comments:
- 471
- Kudos:
- 1,266
- Bookmarks:
- 493
- Hits:
- 36,190
Bookmarked by oldfashionedmorphine
28 Aug 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
simply one of the best things i’ve ever read and can’t wait to read it again ❤️❤️❤️
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#thosetwofirefighters starts to gather a following on social media, as everyone tries to figure out if those two cute firefighters from the 118 in LA are a thing or not.
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it was only a kiss (how did it end up like this) by itsfckingwalnutmist_mate
Fandoms: Ted Lasso (TV)
08 Jun 2024
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Summary
5 times Roy and Jamie fall in love (and kiss) in different countries/cities. +1 time they admit their feelings at home and finally do something about it, realising they don’t have to be out of London to love each other.
Bookmarked by oldfashionedmorphine
02 Apr 2024
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Summary
1 - 20 of 586 Works in Roy Kent/Jamie Tartt
Roy and Jamie separately learn about the existence of footballer RPF and proceed to be completely, utterly, 100% normal about it.
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Roy Kent stopped in front of him. Looked at Jamie, right in his eyes. Time seemed to stop. Jamie opened his mouth, just as he saw Roy Kent open his.
"Absolutely fucking not."
The words hit Jamie like a blow.
No, like a… burn?
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i hate accidents (except when we went from friends to this) by instantcaramel
Fandoms: Ted Lasso (TV)
22 Sep 2022
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Summary
Jamie starts showing up sometimes. Roy never fucking invites him. He just fucking shows up, all times of day, any day of the week. Roy has no fucking clue what he’s done to deserve this, but Jamie Tartt will not fucking leave him alone.
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in no uncertain terms by acheforhim for aisjustrunning, fangrrlsing
Fandoms: Ted Lasso (TV)
15 Mar 2024
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Summary
“You ever feel like you’re stuck?” Roy asks.
“Stuck?”
He doesn’t imagine they’ll believe him, so he can’t outright say what he thinks is going on. “Living the same day over and over again.”
Ted hums. “Like in Stranger than Fiction?”
“More like Groundhog Day.”
Both Ted and Beard turn to look at him. “Expound,” Beard says.—
Roy worries his one-on-one time with Jamie might be done with soon. The universe finds a way to make him realise what that actually means.
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Summary
So when Jamie got the call from Roy’s sister, and an astoundingly clever and important little girl invited him to a sweet and silly little celebration, just them four — that was that, really. He didn’t think too hard about it. Two hours of travel to get here in the middle of a whirlwind training with the fucking National team and he follows the draw, the pull, the immeasurable force guiding him here. Not a single thought of protest, of resistance, even occurred to him. He just made it happen.
He’s really fucking gone, ain’t he?
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Cartrick’s blabbering is muted in Jamie’s ears, as if he’s under a layer of blankets and he feels rooted in place, eyes fixed across the room because-
Roy.
There’s a fault line along Jamie’s chest, the jagged edges splitting his body into two separate halves, along with a heart that hasn’t felt whole for a decade and a half. Roy meets his eyes and the cavern widens, Jamie’s sternum breaking in two. It’s no wonder Jamie can’t remember how to breathe anymore.
or: childhood best friends, a study.
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Summary
When Keeley breaks up with Roy after his spontaneous plans to whisk her away to Marbella for the summer, he makes the trip by himself, intent on forgetting about the break up as best he can through as much booze, tapas, and sunshine as one person can manage during one miserable summer. The last thing he expects is for his car to break down during a road trip up the Spanish coast, where he finds none other than Jamie fucking Tartt - who fell off the face of the Earth after his stint on Lust Conquers All - working in a seaside bar.
Post-season 2 AU where, after getting kicked off of Lust Conquers All, Jamie decides not to return to England or football.
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He can’t hang out with the boys, but he hates going home too. He hates being alone in his new flat, terrified that his dad will find out where he lives now and send them after him again. He’s taken to hanging round the club after training. He’ll find a quiet place to sit, pull out his book, and settle in for as long as he can before the stadium locks up for the night and he's forced to leave.
He’s onto the 34th book to read before you die — Emma — and is surprised by how much he likes it. In comparison to his own drama, gentle scandals and gossip are a nice escape. Today’s reading location is the boot room. The new kitman has some magic way of making it smell of lavender instead of sweaty feet, and if Jamie puts a couple of towels on the bench, it makes a nice pillow to sit on.
Mr Knightley is in the middle of yet another stern lecture — in his head, Knightley looks a lot like Roy, but he's not sure Keeley quite fits as Emma — when the door bangs open. Jamie jumps and is surprised to see Keeley standing there instead of Will, a guilty look on her face.
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After a traumatic event Jamie falls apart, then puts himself back together again. He does the hard work, but he has a little help.
Series
- Part 1 of Lonely Hearts Club
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Summary
He’d known Tartt could do it, but knowing it and fucking watching that masterpiece of a goal happen with his own eyes are two very different things. And best of all, he got to feel responsible for it. He had gotten to set that in motion for Richmond, for his player.
Ted grabs him in celebration, and Roy’s still roaring and oh, fuck. Careful what you wish for, Kent. Jamie’s seeking out his gaze, flipping him off from the middle of the pitch and smirking before accepting praise and hugs from the rest of the team, and Roy had wanted Jamie to spark some emotion in him, but this? This is electric, this is overwhelming. Roy wants to fucking run out there, grab him in a bear hug of his own, and not let go. This might become a new problem.
___Roy wasn't about to admit it, but he'd been sort of excited to see Tartt again. Except when he returns to Richmond, Jamie is... different. On the pitch and off it, he’s quieter, more reserved, a shadow of the person Roy remembers from last season. He’s determined to get to the bottom of the change.
Roy's POV of I Get By With A Little Help
Series
- Part 2 of Lonely Hearts Club
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 46,825
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Comments:
- 223
- Kudos:
- 1,290
- Bookmarks:
- 144
- Hits:
- 36,186
Bookmarked by oldfashionedmorphine
10 Feb 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
this series is simply amazing. loved every second of it ❤️❤️❤️