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  1. Tags
    Summary

    “Don’t—don’t come any closer.” His hesitance betrays his nerves.

    An eyebrow is raised. “Or you’ll what?”

    Tommy gulps. “Kick your ass?”

    “Are you telling me or asking permission?” the man asks, and Tommy groans.

    “Dude, fuck off, just hurry up and get the murder thing over with!”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,539
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    159
    Bookmarks:
    15
    Hits:
    1,017
  2. Tags
    Summary

    “Sources say you went looking for a friend,” Phil says, and Tommy’s heart lurches.

    A friend. That’s what they’re calling him. A friend. Tommy scowls at the table, and Phil’s voice is mockingly soft.

    “Can you tell me when your friend—”

    “Fuck off.”

    or: Tommy has been in hiding for six months to keep his brother's name clear. Phil drags him out of a graveyard at three in the morning, flashing a detective badge that seems a little dull.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,514
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    155
    Bookmarks:
    21
    Hits:
    886
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Something crash landed in his garden.

    “Are you dead?”

    Tommy grew up on an isolated island in a cult that turned him into a paranoid hermit. That is, until the third spring season on his own—when an otherworldly being is dropped right on his doorstep.

    or: 3 times Tommy makes a mistake, and 1 time he doesn’t.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,260
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    7
    Kudos:
    77
    Bookmarks:
    13
    Hits:
    554
  4. Tags
    Summary

    “Sorry I didn’t tell you.”

    “Just as long as you stop lettin’ him run your pockets,” Techno scolds, and Tommy grins, sharp as ever.

    “Fine by me. Big men never get scammed.”

    “Lesson one of many,” Techno drawls sarcastically.

    or: a young Tommy suffers repeated damage to his wings, and Technoblade spends his afternoon prying what happened out of him—and patching him up to boot.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,804
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    123
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    815
  5. Tags
    Summary

    “Why?”

    For a split second, all Tommy wants is to be able to see his own breath in front of him again. He gets the sense this is his true hell—being haunted by these little moments forever, tormented by how badly he wants to live in the past. “Why? Techno, I told you why I came.” He frowns insecurely, arms crossed over his stomach. “What d’you mean, why?”

    “Why me?” Technoblade demands, and it tears Tommy apart to know that he’ll never have an answer for him.

    or: what if Tommy died in the prison for good—and only one person could see his ghost?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,405
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    42
    Kudos:
    256
    Bookmarks:
    41
    Hits:
    1,305
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Tommy thinks, We’re so fucking back.

    Technoblade sends back, I’m goin’ to strangle you when you get home.

    or: a very tired The Blade must take Theseus—a.k.a. his supremely obnoxious roommate—into custody for his vigilante chicanery.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,128
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    34
    Kudos:
    178
    Bookmarks:
    23
    Hits:
    871
  7. Tags
    Summary

    "You said you analyze people when they fight," Tommy says thoughtfully. "So you know what I fight like, right?”

    Technoblade seems reluctant to answer. “Yes,” he says, and Tommy leans forward, eyes wide and curiously interrogative.

    “Well?”

    “You fight like you’re dying.”

    Tommy "Theseus" Soot is the seven-time champion of the seasonal tournament hosted in Hypixel's Arena. Each season, he hopes to be paired with his best friend Ranboo, but the two never seem to get lucky enough. This winter, Tommy hopes for an easy eighth win to make his win streak two years long. When he's paired with temperamental Technoblade, who looks like he could kill someone with a glance, things start to seem like they might go south. Quickly.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    137,501
    Chapters:
    9/10
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    759
    Kudos:
    1,541
    Bookmarks:
    377
    Hits:
    42,213
  8. Tags
    Summary

    One hand presses into Tommy's chest, his own hand, trying in vain to stop the ticking time bomb locked inside, and Techno says, “Theseus,” in a voice that suggests he knows more than he should, and everything in Tommy is coiled tightly, ready to spring. He’s in the house and the house is on fire and his skin is made of glass and all he can do is feel it melt.

    post-exile canon compliant

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,768
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    27
    Kudos:
    393
    Bookmarks:
    38
    Hits:
    3,200
  9. Tags
    Summary

    “Your move, kid,” Blood God says in his body, before disappearing entirely over the edge of the roof. Tommy hears another loud crackling zap of electricity after that, and then another, and realizes that the man is jumping from roof to roof, escaping between Tommy’s fingers before he even has the chance to act.

    He doesn’t want to panic. He shouldn’t panic. He’s still smart, and capable, and a hero.

    He’s totally panicking.

    or: hero Voltage and villain Blood God accidentally switch bodies in a scuffle involving a potion. Nothing goes well, because when does it ever?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    31,241
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    195
    Kudos:
    2,272
    Bookmarks:
    547
    Hits:
    17,221
  10. Tags
    Summary

    “It’s a lot more interesting up here on the roof than it is in the ballroom," Technoblade says simply.

    Tommy bursts into laughter. When he realizes it’s not a joke, that Techno is looking at him with honesty in his eyes, Tommy cuts short and squints. “What? What are you talking about? There are dozens of people in there who are all more interesting than me.”

    “And I’ve been to hundreds of balls,” Technoblade replies wryly. “They don’t get any more interestin’ after the first fifty, I’ll be real with you.”

    or: the prince of the Antarctic Kingdom skips a ball to spend his time with a castle hand on the roof instead.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,062
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    61
    Kudos:
    798
    Bookmarks:
    123
    Hits:
    4,532
  11. Tags
    Summary

    A rumbling laugh is pulled from Technoblade’s chest, the first time Tommy has heard it. It’s strangely melodic for how intimidating he is at first glance. “This body is not human, if that’s what you’re wondering. I have animalistic traits.”

    “Uh-huh,” Tommy agrees, pulling his gaze back to Technoblade’s eyes. “This body?”

    “I can change my form at will. My true form may well send you into a catatonic state.”

    “Oh.” Tommy inspects him for a second. “Well. Don’t show me that, I guess. But this one’s not too bad.” 

    or: Tommy is yanked rudely from prison to serve as a sacrifice to bring an ancient god out of dormancy. Technoblade is not happy when he awakes and finds out they're planning to kill Tommy to complete the ritual.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,833
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    81
    Kudos:
    1,256
    Bookmarks:
    167
    Hits:
    6,321
  12. Tags
    Summary

    “Hey, dickwad,” Tommy begins, kicking at the man’s legs as the house comes back into view, and the bird hybrid sighs begrudgingly in acknowledgement. “What’s your name, anyway?”

    “It’s bad manners to ask someone’s name before offering your own,” is the reply he gets, and Tommy scoffs.

    “Yeah, yeah, we already went over my bad manners, no one gives a shit. Tell me your name or I’ll break your face.”

    There’s a quiet whistle, and the man’s wings— which Tommy has a great view of, being behind him— shuffle. “Name’s Technoblade,” he finally says, “and I’d like to see you try.”

    or: Homeless piglin hybrid Tommy expects an enemy out of the bird-man he steals a pie from. What he actually gets isn't quite what he's expecting.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,137
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    30
    Kudos:
    739
    Bookmarks:
    88
    Hits:
    5,380
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Techno gives him a look, one Tommy knows too well, one Tommy can recognize anywhere: you’re hiding something, and you’re doing a shitty job of it. “You need to come eat.”

    Tommy blinks. “Come eat?” he echoes lamely, and then scrambles to weary, aching feet, untangling himself from the cloak. “You got, like, food and shit?”

    Exile didn't treat him well. Techno's house will be better.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,832
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    32
    Kudos:
    1,073
    Bookmarks:
    123
    Hits:
    7,127
  14. Tags
    Summary

    “You want to hide,” Purpled replies, in disbelief. “You want to hide instead of being ready if they come in?”

    “We can hide and be ready,” Tommy argues, and Purpled grimaces.

    “Yeah, but then we’re backed into a corner.”

    “Well I’ll take that over facing them head on,” Tommy gripes, pushing past Purpled and into the hallway. “Wilbur’s sending us help anyway. So you can either be fuckin’ Mr. Lone Wolf and get your ass beat in the living room without me, or you can come with me and help me pick somewhere they won’t find us as fast.”

    or: Purpled and Tommy's guide to escaping the government.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,096
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    36
    Kudos:
    343
    Bookmarks:
    55
    Hits:
    2,627
  15. Tags
    Summary

    The suspense kills him. Finally, Techno draws in a breath, speaking. “What were you thinking, Tommy? What were you thinking?”

    His chest falls. Dizzy, Tommy lurches forward and back, white-knuckled as he grips the chair. “I was— I was,” he mutters breathlessly, and it’s then that his body chooses to give out on him, his knees buckling under him. Whether it’s from fatigue or fear, Tommy doesn’t know, but it elicits a displeased chuff from Techno, who takes two long strides to catch him before he can hit the floor.

    Decades ago, the age old god Technoblade made a promise to a companion to return a favor: protect his next of kin. Later, when this promise is threatened, Techno is forced to save Tommy Ingrahm's life by introducing him to godhood. Tommy is expected to be grateful and satisfied, but the boy has his own swarm of problems— and trying to combat them all on his own isn't working out so well.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,908
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    73
    Kudos:
    536
    Bookmarks:
    85
    Hits:
    3,958
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Techno stops, narrowing one eye and glancing to Phil. “He’s almost eighteen.”

    “No,” Phil replies firmly, a deep-set worry in his face. “Techno, no. They are children.”

    Techno exhales. “Well, we aren’t here for the runt,” he mutters, and Phil makes a wounded noise. “Just the King.”

    or: newly crowned after the death of his parents, child king Wilbur Soot thinks he's hiring a royal advisor and a captain of the guard. In reality, his council has contracted Phil Watson and Technoblade as assassins on the grounds that the entire kingdom is unhappy with Wilbur's rule. Throughout it all, Tommy wastes away in his room, some sort of mystery illness chipping away at his health.

    Wilbur and Tommy are none the wiser, and Techno and Phil have to make a decision.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,852
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    85
    Kudos:
    1,499
    Bookmarks:
    262
    Hits:
    9,298
  17. Tags
    Summary

    TommyInnit did not grow up coddled by two loving parents to show him what it was like to be human.

    He did not grow up with gently sang lullabies, and he did not grow up searching for the calm before the storm— no, Tommy was the storm. Tommy grew up with a knife tucked into his waistband, slop food, and the promise of money as a reward to simply surviving. He has fought his way to the top, and now, he reaps the benefits.

    When Technoblade left, things changed. Tommy was no longer half of the most powerful duo the Pit had ever seen. He was placed under strict watch and lock and key for two weeks until a new face appeared: Wilbur Soot, who claimed to want him as a running mate. When Tommy accepts, breathing fresh air for the first time in nearly a decade, the Pit will not release the grip it has on his ankles, dragging him back down every time he dares to close his eyes.

    He will never stop looking for the ones that did make him human.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,849
    Chapters:
    5/6
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    196
    Kudos:
    540
    Bookmarks:
    135
    Hits:
    8,532
  18. Tags
    Summary

    “How do you know I won’t have what you really need?” Tommy demands, lips quirking down, and the masked boy shoots him an annoyed look as Tubbo grumbles.

    “Because no normal guy carries a nuclear reactor around in his backpack,” he says, shortly, and Tommy blinks, proven wrong.

    “Oh.”

    or: Tommy, Tubbo, and Ranboo get absolutely Fucked Up by the apocalypse. smiles

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,000
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    61
    Kudos:
    439
    Bookmarks:
    97
    Hits:
    3,745
  19. Tags
    Summary

    "Police and officials alike have deemed these beings as Alternates. It is possible for them to impersonate the appearance and body language of humans down to a T. Some Alternates will appear human, but will have unnatural proportions...”

    "Avoid unnecessary trips out of your home. Avoid interactions with unfamiliar faces, and be certain that family members and friends are feeling healthy and acting like themselves. Under no circumstances should you interact with an Alternate."

    or: Tommy and Wilbur suffer in a Mandela Catalog horror AU.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,700
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    97
    Kudos:
    257
    Bookmarks:
    58
    Hits:
    2,757
  20. Tags
    Summary

    “You aren’t fucking protecting me!” Tommy shouts. The car is heavy with jagged breaths, Wilbur catching his and Tommy finding his own, too. “You’re stifling me! You’re fucking killing me like a bug! I’m dying, Wilbur, I can’t live like this—”

    “Oh, please—”

    “Don’t pretend like you’re not happy to see me like this!” Tommy interrupts sharply, leaning forward in his seat and craning his neck to get a good look at him. “If you’re so fucking obsessed with controlling everything I do, you must like it when I’m fucking miserable, right?”

    or: When Phil dies and Techno moves across the country as a result, Wilbur and Tommy are the only ones left in the house. Tensions rise over the months, and after the nastiest fight they've had in ages, Tommy catches the first bus he can find out of the state to crash at Dream's house. After a handful of days, when the anger has subsided and he's ready to go home... his bus money has made a mysterious disappearance, and Tommy is officially stranded.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,455
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    142
    Kudos:
    1,132
    Bookmarks:
    199
    Hits:
    9,822

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